#professional goofballs | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

daisynik7 · 6 months

Note

“freak-a-leek” by petey pablo for a jean and eren threesome if that’s okay plz

Freek-A-Leak

Pairing: Eren Jaeger x f!reader x Jean Kirstein

Rating: Explicit – MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

Word Count: ~1.9k

cw: modern setting au, explicit language, p*rn w/no plot, smut – threesome, PIV sex (missionary), cunnilingus, blowjob, sex toy use, masturbation, cum-eating, dirty talk, sex without a condom, pet names (baby, sweetheart), reader has multiple orgasms, creampies, just some overall smutty silliness

Summary: You’re on a business trip with the two cockiest salesmen in your department: Eren Jaeger and Jean Kirstein. After a long day of dealing with them clashing over the silliest things, you decide to unwind in your hotel room the best way you know how.

Author’s Note: This is the last song on the y2k karaoke party playlist! Thank you so much for the request anon! I had fun with this! It’s all horny and just plain silly, so I hope you like it. Thank you so much for reading! MDNI divider by @/cafekitsune.

It’s almost 10 PM when you finally make it back to your hotel room, completely spent from today’s activities. It’s the first day of the conference here in Marley and being stuck in the middle of Eren Jaeger and Jean Kirstein has proven to be much more exhausting than you anticipated.

You’re not completely convinced you needed to come on this business trip with them. After all, they’re the top two salesmen in your department, and this conference is solely for selling your product to new customers. Your boss, Hangë, encouraged you, the lead design engineer, to tag along in case they needed any technical support while demonstrating the ODM equipment. You were reluctant at first, but when they emphasized the fact that this trip would be completely paid for, including the lodging and food, how could you refuse?

Unfortunately for you, because of the two clashing personalities between Jean and Eren, you ended up playing mediator throughout the day rather than engineer. The two bickered as usual, from where to eat, to what side of the table they wanted to stand on. In front of the customers, they were professional and charismatic, no hint of animosity lingering around them. As soon as it was the three of you alone, it was nonstop arguing and snide remarks, with you doing your best to either ignore it or alleviate it until the next fight arose.

Luckily for you, Hangë set you up with your own room at the hotel while the other two shared the one right beside you. There’s an adjoining door for easy access into each other’s space and Jean begs you to open it when you first check in, not wanting a single moment alone with his temporary roommate. But after today’s festivities, you’re desperate for some private time by yourself.

Jean steps into your room, leaning against the doorframe. “So, should we watch a movie?” he suggests, still in his dress shirt, tie loosened around his collar.

Eren appears behind him, on his tip-toes to get your attention. “Why don’t we play video games instead?”

You yawn, shooing them away. “I’m exhausted, so I’m going to sleep.”

You try to shut the door on them, but Jean pushes back, persistent. “You’re not seriously going to leave me alone with him, are you?” He points his thumb to the man behind him.

Eren scoffs. “I don’t want to be alone with you either!”

“Dude, you are breathing down my neck! Give me some space.”

“Then move so I can talk to her!”

“It’s not your turn to talk!”

“Guys!” you yell, losing your patience. “I am tired. Try to get along so we can all get some sleep. Please?”

They grumble to themselves, shoving elbows at each other before they finally leave you alone, closing the door to give you your peace. You don’t bother locking in, certain they won’t be bothering you the rest of the night.

After a nice, hot shower, you get comfortable in your pajamas, rummaging through one of your pouches until you find what you’re looking for. After a long day with those two goofballs, the best way for you to relieve stress is to have a little playtime. You carry your vibrator with you to bed, one ear bud in, and your favorite naughty audio ready to play on your phone. Only five minutes in, with the fluttering tip pressed to your clit, it doesn’t take long for you to orgasm. Ready for another, you get distracted by the muffled voices of your neighbors, bickering once again. You pop your ear bud out, trying to hear whatever dumb topic they’re arguing about now. The toy is still vibrating in your hands, the tip wet with your arousal. You let your imagination wander, thinking of Jean and Eren just on the other side of the wall. Hot, heated, raring to go. Fantasizing about the nasty, filthy things they could do to you if they knew just how horny you are, pent up with sexual frustration from all the testosterone you were surrounded with today.

Suddenly, the door swings open and Eren stomps into the room, shouting your name. “Who do you find more annoying, me or him?!” Jean follows right on his tail, trying to grab him by the collar of his undershirt, hissing, “She’s sleeping, you dumbass!” They stop in their tracks, staring wide-eyed at you with your legs spread open on the bed, blanket shrugged off, vibrator buzzing in your hand. Completely exposed.

You quickly pull the covers over you, hiding the toy beneath your pillow, mortified. “What the fuck?!” you yell out to them.

Both of them gape at you, blushing all the way down to their necks, speechless for the first time all day. Their silence is louder than any squabbling they’ve done today, and you have no idea what to say to make this any less awkward than it already is.

Before you can think of another response, Eren clears his throat, rubbing the back of his neck. “Hey Jean. Bet I can make her come harder than you can.”

Jean glances at him, hesitant at first, then relaxes into a smirk. “Oh yeah? You’re on.”

Eren steps towards the bed, grinning at you. “What do you say? Will you help us?”

You stare at them, befuddled and also extremely intrigued by this offer. Deciding quickly, you nod at them, releasing the grip on the blanket. They both smile at you, putting a flutter in your belly. Eren laughs, tugging on the covers slowly. “Come on. You can’t hide from us now.”

Jean joins in, dragging it down your body until you’re on display again, pussy glistening from your first orgasm. They both swear under their breaths, Eren licking his lips while Jean bites his. “Fuck, did you already come?”

“Yeah, I did,” you answer, pussy aching to be touched by either one of them. Both of them.

“Fuck, that’s hot,” Eren says, inching towards you. “You’re extra juicy for me, huh?”

“Why do you get to go first?” Jean butts in, scowling.

Eren positions himself at your arousal, his breath hot on your pussy as he replies, “I don’t want to lick your spit.”

“Well, I don’t want to lick yours either! Let me goes first.”

“Fuck you, I’m already here.”

“Then move!”

“Guys!” you cry out, bucking your hips, desperate for anything at this point. “Just hurry up and touch me. Please.”

Eren sticks his tongue out. “You heard her,” he muffles, licking circles around your clit. “Let’s make our girl feel good.”

Jean swallows hard, positioning himself beside you, puckering his lips around your nipples and sucking. You moan, arching your back off the bed, running your fingers through his hair. “Feels so good,” you whine, feeding your other breast to him. He latches on immediately, pulling your teat between his lips while Eren laps at your puffy clit. With your free hand, you grab hold of his hair, gripping it to pull him deeper into your cunt. Soon, you’re gushing on his face, rutting your hips against him while he swallows every drop of you.

“Fuck, you taste good,” Eren says, tongue prodding into your slit.

“I want a taste too,” Jean mutters, giving your nipple one last hard suck before he releases you with a wet pop.

“Not yet,” Eren murmurs, kissing the soft plush of your thighs.

Jean crawls to where he is, shoving him slightly to stick his face into your pussy. “It’s my turn, jackass.” He laps at your clit, determined to be better than his rival.

Eren laughs, collecting your slick slathered on his chin and lips with his fingers, licking it off. “Be honest, baby. Is he doing better than me?” He strips out of his bottoms, lying beside you, stroking his hard cock.

You squeeze your thighs around Jean’s head, bucking into his mouth, already close to your third climax. Your eyes go from Eren’s fist jerking himself off to Jean’s face shaking between your legs, eating you out feverishly. He teases a finger inside you and when you flutter around it, he slides in all the way, adding a second.

“No fair,” Eren breathes out, stroking himself faster.

Jean chuckles against your skin, sucking on your clit while he pumps his fingers in and out of you. You turn your head to face Eren, leaning towards him to kiss him sloppily. He cradles your cheek with his free hand, pulling you in deeper, tongue swirling around yours, slurping up your spit. Once again, you’re pushed over the edge, coming on Jean’s face this time, his nose pressed to your sensitive bud as he drinks up all the slick leaking out of you.

“Fuck me,” you beg, not directing it to anyone in particular.

Eren smiles against your mouth, licking your drool off the corners of your lips. “Go ahead, Jean. You can go first.”

Jean shoves his pants down, releasing his stiff cock, palming it. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah,” he says, kneeling next to your head, tracing your lips with the tip of his cock. “We’re having way too much fun right here, aren’t we sweetheart?” You nod in response, moaning around his dick as you sink your mouth on it, swallowing it until it’s to the back of your throat. “Fuck, you take it so good. You wanted to get fucked like this tonight, huh? Wanted to show us what a freak you are.”

Jean slides his cock inside you, stretching you out until he bottoms out. He spreads your legs apart, holding you open so he can pound straight into you. Eren’s focus goes from his own pleasure to his friend thrusting. “Fuck her harder, Jean.”

He obeys, picking up the pace, shoving himself deeper. You choke on your own moans, pulling off Eren to catch your breath. He cradles your face in his hands, massaging your cheeks tenderly. “You’re okay, sweetheart. Take a break. Just enjoy getting fucked by this fat cock.”

“Fuck,” Jean growls, closing his eyes. “I’m so close.”

Eren licks his lips, watching. “Don’t pull out. Fill her up.”

At that, Jean loses it, spurting his hot load inside you, your pussy fluttering around him. He pulls out, switching spots with Eren, snuggling up next to you to kiss you softly. You smile at him, whispering, “Thank you.”

He plants a smooch on your nose. “Thank you, baby.”

“Hey, don’t forget about me,” Eren says, guiding his hard cock inside you. “I’m going to fuck all this cum right back inside this cunt.”

You and Jean both moan, watching him fuck you with a devilish grin on his face. Jean reaches under the pillow, retrieving the toy you used earlier. “Can I use this on you?”

Incoherent and fucked out, you nod, desperate for whatever it is they want to offer to you. He presses the button, making the vibrator buzz in his grip, pressing the fluttering tip to your clit while Eren continues to ravish you. His eyes widen when he sees what Jean’s doing. “Oh shit. She’s squeezing me so fucking tight.”

You’re in a drunken daze, trembling all over your body from the pleasure, whimpering uncontrollably with Jean toying with your clit as Eren fucks your brains out. When you reach your final climax, Eren comes with you, burying his cum deep inside your womb. You’re stuffed to the brim with both their loads, feeling exhausted and euphoric.

Eren pulls out, cuddling up to your other side, kissing your forehead. Jean sets the vibrator aside, spooning you from the back. You relax in their arms, actually happy to be stuck in the middle of them for once.

After a moment of comfortable silence, Eren asks jokingly, “So…who won?”

“Obviously me,” Jean grins, kissing your neck.

You laugh, snuggling closer to the both of them. “I think I’m the real winner here.”

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moremaybank · 6 months

Text

SOMETHING STUPID — s.h

pairing steve harrington x fem!reader

summary steve's overwhelmed by the love he feels for you and blurts out a question he can't take back. he's sure you'll think he's crazy, but do you?

warnings language, but it's basically just a whole lotta fluff and steve being the cute cutie he is

author's note did i pull inspo from haley’s dad’s speech in oth?? hell yes. also, i'm really happy with how this turned out, not gonna lie. please read if you have the chance, it'll make my day ♡︎

steve masterlist

When Steve steps through the door after work with an exhausted sigh, he’s pleasantly surprised. He’s spent his entire life coming home to an empty house, always filled with a blaring silence that acted as a daunting reminder of how lonely he felt deep down inside. There was never anyone around to ask him how his day was. What was going on in his life, or if he was happy — and not the phoney kind.

He’s so used to weathering the storm on his own, day in and day out, that he’s completely forgotten someone will be there for him this time. The previously empty home is now occupied by you and your bright, loving energy. The quiet was replaced with your music bouncing off the walls. You’re active in the mostly untouched kitchen, baking to your heart’s content and constantly stuffing your Stevie’s face full of sweets.

Steve finally feels as if he truly has a home, and not just a place where he stores his belongings and rests his head at night.

He makes his way through the halls, finally reaching the entryway to the kitchen and leaning against the doorframe. The dimmed lights glow throughout the room, and the artfully scattered candles burn brightly in the darkened space. Further adding to the already homey atmosphere, the sweet aroma of fresh baked goods fills the air, thanks to the chocolate chip cookies you have baking in the oven. Even with all of this going on, though, Steve can only seem to focus on one thing.

You.

Your frilled socks glide against the kitchen floor as you jump and twirl around on the tiles. The sound of Say You Love Me by Fleetwood Mac quells the silence, your record player turned up the highest it can go (because, in your professional opinion, there was no other way to listen to music). You pull out your signature dance moves, screwing your eyes shut and kicking your legs in the air so many times that Steve fears you’re in an imaginary fight with someone — and losing. Terribly. He also takes notice of the spatula in your hand, acting as a stand-in microphone while you lip-sync along to the lyrics.

You’re a goofball, through and through. Still, though, Steve is utterly smitten.

“Sweet moves, baby,” he says, loud enough to be heard over the music.

Your eyes go wide as your body stills, completely mortified that Steve has caught you in your own little world. You turn the music down, swiping the stray hairs away from your slightly sticky forehead and clearing your throat.

“Steve! H-hey. I was just, uh…cleaning the floors. You know, makin’ them all nice and shiny for you,” you laugh uneasily. It’s complete crap and you both know it, but you’re desperate. Frankly, you’ll say anything if it means distracting Steve from this whole performing your own world tour in the middle of the kitchen thing.

Steve cocks a brow, tongue poking his cheek as he tries to hide the grin that threatens to come into view. “Hm,” he hums, “cleaning the floors, huh?”

“Yup.”

“…With your socks?”

“Yeah,” you breathe, still slightly breathless, “It’s a…great way to incorporate exercise into daily household chores.”

Steve tries to stop it, but he can’t help but let a laugh escape from his lips. He walks over to you, arms wide open and ready to encircle around you. “C’mere, you goof. Gimme some sugar.”

You break out into a grin, happily stepping into your boyfriend’s embrace and giving him a tight hug. You feel his hands smooth down your back before wrapping around your waist and holding you tighter to him. After a moment, you pull away, and your hands come up to his face so you can press your lips to his. He hums into the kiss contently, melting into the touch he’s been longing all day for.

“Missed you so much,” Steve pouts, his bottom lip jutting out adorably.

“I missed you too,” you reply, granting him another kiss. “How was your day?”

Before Steve can answer, Say You Love Me comes to a stop, and the soft sounds of Landslide begin to bleed into the silence. Choosing to let you enjoy your favourite song, Steve shrugs it off, “We can talk about that later, wanna dance with you.”

Steve extends his hand toward you, silently asking for you to join your hand in his. You smile, sliding your palm into his and letting him pull you to his chest. He keeps his other hand on the small of your back, and your free arm curls around his shoulder as the two of you begin to sway together in time with the music. Steve feels you nuzzle your face into the crook of his neck and relax further into his hold, and he lets the voice of Stevie Nicks wrap around you both like a warm blanket as he holds you.

The two of you sway back and forth, taking a peaceful moment to feel your hearts beat against one another. Steve never wants to let go. This is the closest and most intimate he’s ever felt with anyone, and that should scare him, he thinks. But it doesn’t, because being with you feels like heaven on earth. He can’t believe that he’s found someone who makes his heart soar the way you do. Who makes him smile so hard his cheeks hurt, and gives him a love so deep and true that it’s become a vital part of him. Just thinking of you makes his knees weak.

He’s completely enamoured by you.

“What are you thinking about?” You ask, breaking him free from his thoughts as you pull away from his grasp slightly.

Steve looks down at you, remaining silent, and his gaze flashes over your features. The kind eyes he feels he’s always known. The tiny scar near your temple from where you’d gotten stitches as a child. The curve of your lips and how he swears he can feel them gliding over his own every single time he thinks about them. He then moved onto the oversized t-shirt your body is clad in — one you’d obviously stolen out of his closet, and the pair of boxers hanging from your hips (also swiped from his wardrobe). Your aforementioned frilly socks pulled your signature at-home look together, one that brought an incredible amount of comfort to Steve. It shows him that you consider his home to be your home too. That you’ve found a home in him, just as he has with you.

He can see himself doing this whole life thing with you forever, and he can’t explain it, but he suddenly feels compelled to speak up, and the words tumble from his lips before he can stop them.

“Do you wanna get married?”

Your head shoots up, and you peer up at him with a look of shock. “I’m sorry, w-what?”

Steve’s eyes threaten to bulge out of their sockets, and his heart rate skyrockets as the panic waves through him. “Oh god, I- I said that out loud,” he says, slowly letting go of you and running a hand through his long chestnut locks. “Wow. Uh— Okay.”

“Did— Did you just ask me to marry you?” You stammer, quiet as a mouse. You don’t move. Steve doesn’t think you can.

It’s obvious that you think he’s gone certifiably insane. His hands raise in defence, and he manages to start blurting out everything he can in an attempt to rectify the situation. “Listen, baby, we can totally act like that never happened—”

“Steve—”

“—In fact, it didn’t. I have no idea what you’re talking about, babe. No freakin’ idea—”

Finally, your hand cups over his mouth to stop him from rambling any further. His last few words sound muffled before they eventually come to a stop once he realizes what’s happening. His fingers curl around your wrist, moving your hand from his lips before giving you a small, sheepish smile. His cheeks flush profusely, “Sorry.”

Oh, the things Steve would do if it meant he could take back the last few minutes of his life and go back to before he opened his big mouth and ruined everything. It’s not that he doesn’t want to marry you. That’s definitely not the case. But the regret he’s currently feeling after watching your horrified reaction play out…it’s enough to make him want to jump into his pool and never come back up for air.

But then…when your eyes seem to light up and a small smile curves your lips upward, he thinks there just might be some hope left for him.

“You wanna marry me?” You questioned, your hands finding solace on his lower arms. “Why?”

His brows pull together in confusion? Why? He can see the doubt eating away at you by how small you’ve become in the past few seconds. Are you truly doubting how much you mean to him? How much you’ve spun his world on its axis and changed him forever?

“I— What?”

“Why would you want me to marry you?”

“Yeah, I got that, I just…are you serious?” You nod, giving him the slightest shrug. Your shyness is peaking through far too much for you to offer him any more of a reaction.

A soft and gentle laugh slips past his lips and his body relaxes. His warm palm smoothes up your arm and finds its resting place at the base of your jaw. His thumb swipes over your skin, and his warmth bleeds through your flesh. All the love he holds in his heart for you floats up to his eyes, and his chocolate orbs soften. He’s never felt so tender and full of affection as he does now.

“You have no idea how special you are to me, do you?”

He says it with such conviction that you know the words are true to his heart. Still, the way they hit you is all too much, and you can’t help but deflect them with a tiny joke. Your eyes fall away from his. “I mean, I figured you liked me a little.”

“Stop,” he chides, albeit gently. He guides your gaze back onto his. “I’m serious.”

It’s your turn to apologize as your cheeks heat up. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. Just, hear me out.”

“Okay,” you murmur.

His left hand mirrors the hold his right one has on your face. The ring you gifted him for your first anniversary is cold against your skin. His tongue darts out to wet his lips, and he takes a breath before speaking. “You— You’re staggering, honey. You’ve given my heart a home. You’ve had it since the moment I met you, and you’ve kept it safe. Cherished it and nurtured it. You’ve given me everything I’ve ever wanted. I— I look into your eyes and it's like I can see the rest of my life inside ‘em.”

Your heart melts, and you feel the tears start to pool in the brims of your eyes. “Steve,” you whisper.

“I have no idea what’s going to happen in the future. Not a freakin’ clue, especially with all the supernatural shit that goes on in this town. But I do know that you’re supposed to be in it. You are my future, baby. I might not know a lot, but I do know this. You are the girl I’m going to spend my life loving. And I’m gonna give you everything if you’ll let me.”

His heartfelt words are almost enough to make you forget about your doubts. You want them to. But you can’t seem to quiet the worries circling inside your head.

“Steve, I love you. You know I do. But, aren’t we too young? I don’t want to risk losing you. I don’t think I could take it if I did.”

His hands slide down your neck and land on your shoulders. His warmth spreads through you again, and already, you feel better. It’s almost as if all he has to do is exist to wash your fears away.

“I know. I know we’re young. But, so what if we are? To me, that just means I get to be with you even longer.” One hand abandons your shoulder, and he hooks his index finger under your chin. The pad of his thumb strokes over the tip of your chin. Eyes boring into your soul, he holds them captive. “You can drive at sixteen, drink at twenty-one, retire in your sixties. How old do you have to be to know that your love will last? ‘Cause I know my answer, down to the second.”

You can’t seem to hide the smile that forces its way onto your lips. The sincerity in his gaze, the vulnerability he’s shown you since day one, it’s all too much. You can’t imagine ever walking away from him, can’t imagine what your life would be like if he wasn’t in it. Mornings you shared where he’d pout as soon as you mentioned getting out of bed. Picnics on warm summer days. Hearing him sing along to the radio in the car. You want those memories and every single one that would come to you in the future — your future with him.

“Ask me again.”

“Yeah?” He smiled.

“Yeah,” you confirmed. But just as he’s about to do as you asked, half of the words leaving his mouth, you can’t contain the excitement. Your lips slam onto his as you pull him closer. You murmur a few yesses against his lips and feel them spread into a grin. Soon, his arms are wrapped around your waist and he’s lifting you up and into the air, spinning you around with joy. The kitchen is soon filled with giggles, and Steve is exclaiming your news loudly, even though you’re both alone.

“We’re getting married, sweetheart!”

STEVE TAG LIST (JOIN HERE): @oncasette @taintedxkisses @findapenny @bmo-bri @hemogloban @slytherhoes @shawnspoems @vigilanteshitposting @poppet05 @earth2starkey @aerangi @cantstoptherecs @sarah5462 @slut4drudy @cilliansangel @darleneslane @sya-skies @gillybear17 @lovelyxtom @rcbuttercup @redhead1180 @runningfrom2am @thejuleshypothesis @scarlettocean @subconsciouscollapse @violetmacher @iluvteyqmm @buckyisveryhot

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gweninred · 3 months

Text

sleeping

melissa schemmenti x reader

I’m kind of embarrassed to post this but whatever 😭 it’s just some fluff

“Melissa! Did you bring your baseball stick?” You pulled the object out of her bag. You were on a field trip to the museum were you had to stay the night with the kids. “What? It might come in handy!” You quickly put it back before any of the kids sees it. “I told you not to bring it!” You whisper yelled at your girlfriend. “Gosh, hon, whatever.” She sighs, pulling out the air mattress for both of you.

While you helped one of your third grade students Melissa called out your name. “Honey?” You finished helping the kid. “Yeah?” You walked up to her side looking down at the air mattress, seeing its a single bed instead of for two people. “Are you serious?” You giggled looping your arm around Melissa’s, practically hugging her arm. “I thought I got the right one.” She kissed the side of your head. During work you both liked to keep things professional, even though everyone knew about your relationship. But after this long day you both were getting a little clingy. Now you also had to sleep on a single air mattress. “You are one goofball!” You laughed at the redhead. Poking her side, a squeal from her mouth. “Don’t! You know I’m ticklish!” You poked her side again. “That’s your punishment!” You both giggled, your girlfriend removing herself from your grasp to escape your tickles.

“Ms. Schemmenti? One of her students pulled her hand. “Yes, kid?” Her smile softened and she slipped back into teacher mode. “You promised to read us a bed time story.” Melissa pulled a book from her bag. Then took her a students hand in hers to walk back the group of children, already laying comfortably in their sleeping bags. She sat down and began reading the book.

While Melissa was reading to her students you checked on your group, seeing most of them already asleep. A few quietly chatting with each other. You grabbed your pyjamas and went to the bathroom to change.

“They’re finally asleep.” A familiar raspy voice filled the room as the door opened. You looked at the redhead through the mirror, you were taking off your make-up. “Mh, I’m pretty tired too.” Melissa wrapped her arms around your waist, pulling you close. A few wet kisses were placed on the back of your neck.

Then the door opened, Ava barged in. “You weren’t about to do anything freaky in here, right?” Melissa pulled away from you. The principal cheered, placing a bag of skincare on the bathroom counter. “Ava! What do you think?” You playfully hit her arm. “I’m just making sure!” You brushed your teeth. “I don’t know about you guys but I’m going to bed.” You spoke, you patted Melissa butt before leaving the two woman.

When you had gotten comfy in bed, almost asleep you felt Melissa’s hand stroking a few strands of hair from your forehead. “You awake?” She whispered, you opened your eyes. “Mhm.” You hummed. You opened the blanket and opened your arms for her. She gladly accepted the invitation and scooted by your side. Due the small bed you were both laying on your sides, facing each other. Melissa’s hand draped around waist, legs tangled together and your bodies flush against each other. You kissed her, stroking her fire red hair. “This is cozy.” She whispered, not trying to wake up de kids. You hummed once again, enjoying the company. Your hand moved down to her back, rubbing it up and down lightly with your finger tips. You moved your head in the crook of her neck. Her scent filling your nose trills. “Sleep tight, love.”

#lesbian #fanfic #abbott elementary #lisa ann walter #melissa schemmenti fanfic #melissa schemmenti x you #melissa schemmenti imagine #melissa schemmenti x reader #melissa schemmenti

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picturesofthearsenal · 2 years

Photo

Aaron Ramsdale of Arsenal during the Arsenal Media Day at the Arsenal Training Ground at London Colney on August 01, 2022 in St Albans, England. (Photo by David Price/Arsenal FC via Getty Images)

#aaron ramsdale #arsenal #afc #media day #professional goofballs #lol #010822 #behind the scenes

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mutiniir · 9 months

Text

bro thinks he's so cool and edgy but turns out he's such a fucking goofball like

"heehee stab, stab, stab~" says the professional gunsman

#tf2 #tf2 sniper

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luveline · 9 months

Note

(if you’re still doing the baby blurbs! 💓👼🏻) maybe something with eddie being a little goofball gentleman? i can picture him like laying down his jacket over the tiniest puddle or sprinting ahead of you to open every door even tho u keep yelling at him every time he does 😊

thank u for ur request! fem!reader

"We can't forget you have that dentist appointment on Wednesday," you're saying distractedly, eyes on the rearview mirror as you reverse into a parking space. "You missed your last one and they charged you anyways, those losers."

You haven't even turned the engine off when Eddie's throwing open the passenger door. He climbs out, slams it closed, and then, with all the speed and dexterity of a professional sportsman (think baseball, or even ice hockey), he flies across the hood of the car to your side and yanks open your door.

"My lady," he says breathlessly, gesturing for you to step out.

You blink at him. Your lips pull up into an open-mouthed, breathless smile, a tear-like warmth collecting in your eyes. "Are you real?"

He grins at your expression, knowing how funny he is, "A real gentleman," he says smugly. "Come, my lady. We've groceries to procure."

You swing your legs out of the car and take his hand, giggling with a sickly, giddy affection. He helps you up and kisses your hand.

"This is one of the silliest things you've ever done," you say fondly.

"Can't a man treat his woman as she deserves to be treated?"

You lock the car. "Not if he's going to almost smash his head in."

"I barely tripped!" he argues, eager to take your hand again, forcing his fingers through yours and swinging them between your bodies.

He's in a ridiculously good mood today, his theatrical excitement at an all time high, joy lighting his features. He looks even more handsome than usual when he's this happy.

You indulge his mood and lean up to peck his jaw. "Thank you, sir."

"The effect might have been grander if my van wasn't still in the shop, but you got the idea," he says, the wind quick to return his newly washed hair to its usual frizz while you walk from the car to the front of the store. "Wait!"

His shout startles you. You stop dead at the lip of the asphalt outside of the store, worried you're about to step on something small, but Eddie's perceived an even smaller risk.

There's a puddle.

He steps over it onto the sidewalk. You get the sense you should wait, and sure enough, he offers you both hands and 'helps' you cross treacherous waters rather than let you wet the bottom of your battered converse.

"Whew. Almost lost you," Eddie says, his eyes squinting gently with his smile. He knows he's being ridiculous. He takes pleasure in it.

You rub his knuckles where your hands are still clasped between you. "My hero," you croon.

He beams, but then he turns on his heel and sprints to the automatic doors, arms out. "Quickly, sweetheart! Before they close!"

You snort at him. "I hope you're not planning on doing this all day."

"Of course not."

Grocery shopping with him is nearly impossible. Eddie tries to guess your every thought, opening fridges and freezers for you before you've so much as looked at them, wrestling a water crate out of your hand lest you strain your beautiful arms. You have to shout at him to stop when he almost hits an unsuspecting shopper in the face with a glass door, but you kiss his bruised ego better somewhere between the pastries and the fresh bread, and he promptly calms down.

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson oneshot #eddie munson scenario #eddie munson drabble #eddie munson fic #eddie munson fanfiction #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things #stranger things fic #stranger things x reader

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andiboyo · 1 year

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HEADCANONS FOR COD MEN

The following includes (John Price, John MacTavish, Simon Riley, Philip Graves, and Alejandro Vargas)

"Price" John Price

-Very professional at first when dating, he’s a very respectable guy but later he’s just mush in your hands

-This man loves you with all his heart, poor man’s an old sap, but he’s your old sap <3

-Prepare for a lot of teasing from teammates

-If you’re in the military, he’s 100% for it, but will treat you the same as his soldiers on the battleground, little cracks include when missions start or end

-He’s very worried for you, he’s scared to see you getting hurt

-If you’re a normal civilian waiting for him at home you bet your ass he’s a domestic goofball

-He loves you, and any chance he gets he’s putting a ring on that finger

-Loves taking you to dinner either way, a gentleman

-You’re pretty much best buds with 141

-Quality time is his best strong suit, he’s an old man so he’s got more time on his hands

“Soap” Johnny McTavish

-Scotsman, 100% teases you 24/7

-Loves the look of his flustered S/O

-Don’t even get him started on if his S/O’s in the military, always one eye open for them

-But otherwise, he believes in your strength, he’s just never had such deep love for a person as he has with you

-After every mission good or bad, kiss on the forehead, he’s affectionate

-If you’re a normal civilian he’s spilling the beans on military life, nothing gruesome though, you're the light of his life and he doesn’t want you hearing too much of his military brutality and sacrifices

-Overall he’s an attentive lover that gives gifts, he’s all for dates but since he’s on the younger side he’s always getting called in

-He loves you though and send you letters every week <3

“Ghost” Simon Riley

-Serious on the battlefield before and after, but in private?

-This man is a cuddle bug

-Love him <33

-He's just so clingy

-If you're in the military he’s alright with that, doesn’t doubt your abilities and has good expectations for having his S/O with him

-If you’re a normal civilian chances are how you met is you are friends with one of the 141 members and they introduced you to him

-One thing led to the next

-And you got together

-It takes time but he’ll take off his mask

-He lets you do the honors, but it takes a bit for him to warm up to that idea

-So expect to sleep with a man still wearing his skull mask

-Overall a sweetheart and a fine gentleman, he likes spending quality time with you whenever he can, little souvenirs too from the battlefield

-Very shy to ask for anything, hugging, kissing, handholding? This man has had a few women in his life maybe, yeah, but you’re his first true love, he’s putty in your hands

(Lord have mercy)

“Graves” Philip Graves

-He prefers a S/O that’s a normal civilian

-If you’re in the military and he takes a liking to you, then he’s gonna be wrapped around your finger

-He’s just so worried of the future that if he knows you face danger every day it’s gonna be a weigh on his shoulders

-He doesn’t mind it, he doesn’t doubt your abilities he’s just very worried

-Now, if you’re a civilian and he falls in love with you, he’s such a protective Boyfriend/Husband

-Loves you to bits

-Will never stop talking to you about missions and just wants you safe

-Hand holding 24/7

-He’s very shy when asking for things like hugs, just not used to it as much

-Gift giving and Quality time

-Best of both worlds with this man

(screaming)

“Alejandro” Alejandro Vargas

-OH

-MI VIDA <3333

-Do not think he will judge whether you're in the military or a civilian

-He loves you no matter what

-Race? Ethnicity? Doesn't matter?

-Having a hispanic S/O? Great! You bond some more!

-American S/O who doesn’t know spanish? He’s using unknown compliments in spanish to his advantage

-Im sorry

-He's just so fine

-Now, he's a man of quality time, compliment giving

-But in his line of work, he’ll tease a lot, though serious, he needs a few laidback moments

-If you’re in the military, he’ll be one step behind you

-If you’re a normal civilian, he's always coming back to you with open arms a̶n̶d̶ ̶o̶p̶e̶n̶ ̶l̶e̶g̶s̶

-He’s only nervous about one thing, kissing, mans always asks you even if you’ve reassured him one-hundred times

-------

A/N

hey all! It's been a bit. Im alive. Been a good minute hasn't it? Not really going to be running a schedule again but if you'd like to request any characters from these fandoms go ahead! It might motivate me to write more! Thank you <3

-COD MW2

-Marvel

-Resident Evil

-Arthur Morgan

-Overwatch

Love you all!

- Andi

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gentlebeardsbarngrill · 2 months

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02/19/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; Cast & Crew; Rhys Darby; Con O'Neil; Kristian Nairn; Samba Schutte; Wee John Wondays; LubeAsACrew; Stats/Trends; Fan Spotlight; Engagement Prompts; LoveNotes; Daily Darby/Tonight's Taika

Hey All, today's been an off day for me, so please let me know if I've missed something. Hope you all had fun!

= Cast & Crew Sightings =

== Rhys Darby ==

Well, our goofball of a captain is back with more Red Dead Redemption II, check out Part 2 below:

youtube

Rhys also did comedy at Bourbon Room Hollywood last week, and = tmiddendorfphoto on IG captured quite a lot of photos of his set. Feel free to visit them:

== Con O ' Neill ==

Whoops! I had this prepped for yesterday then completely forgot, sorry Con! Con was out seeing BettyRules in NYC!

== Wee John Wonday ==

Kristian had Samba on WJW Today! Lots of cool stuff they chatted above! If you're unable to watch right now, there's a small breakdown of various high points below:

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Kristian Nairn (@kristiannairn)

instagram

Highlights/Things We Learned:

Samba baby's name is Ocean

Samba was kind enough to stand in for WJW when someone else had to drop off for work.

Samba loves giving Kristian middle names: Kristian Victoria Nairn / Kristian Alexander Nairn / Kristian Valaria Nairn, Kristian Venereal Disease Nairn / Kristian Damien Nairn / Kristian Nicholas Nairn / Kristian Tabitha Nairn

There were live doves that would shit on you on set, and they shat on Samson

Kristian was a professional Chef

Samba wants to do Cryptic Factor w/Rhys

Samba is big into ufo's and cryptids

Kristian is also into paranormal stuff

Kristian - In New Zealand saw weird things on the lawn of his rental place (weird creatures focused on the balcony of his room)

David Fane - ate all the cheese in Calypso's Birthday

They really appreciate all the fans trying to save OFMD and would LOVE to get a season 3, even if only for 2 hours.

Samba would like ot do a bts/blooper combo but has to get permission first

For the wrap party, the cast members got each other gifts:

Samson got everyone crocs

EDIT: David Fane gave them Samoan necklaces (ty @denizbevan)!

Kristian said his "Gifts got stolen"

Samba gave them pictures / BTS videos

Q: Who was most elusive in regards to BTS?

Joel - also Ewan

Q: Favorite Soup?

Sambas favorite Soup - Chicken Noodle (chicken soup)

Kristian's favorite Soup - Cream of Tomato

Q: Did anything change with Roach in S2?

Yes, he became softer / trusting

Q: Lots of great energy and hanging out between crew members and family, (not something often seen) what do you think led to that?

Casting director Alison Jones - awesome at casting

Energy on set was positive and acceptance from the get go that helped

Sailing training, stunt training, sword fighting together helped bonding

Everyone on the cast was odd, and people moved out together so lots of small found family situations

Long hours together

Note: Stede's story time everyone is actually asleep, cause they've been up for like 18 hrs

Q: What's your favourite dessert, that you could live off forever?

Roach - Chocolate Mousse, really fluffy and airy

Kristian - Black Forest Cake

Q: What was best part of working in New Zealand?

8 hr days instead of 18 hrs days

Nature was gorgeous

Maori Elders did a land blessing

Q: Roach played a lot of roles, what do you think was his main role?

Cook, Doctor, therapist in that order.

Q: Would Aamba release a cookbook?

If enough interest, Yes - OFMD Cast Favorite Cookbook

And Mac and cheese recipe

Cakes and desserts

Q: What's it like being a new dad?

Amazing , no time to catch breath, feeling a lot of protectiveness and excitement and energy to step up and take care of the kiddo So fulfilling, Sambas a great dad.

Original Script / Deleted Scene Stuff:

In original script: Roach was going to end up with the crew of revenge, but then changed the script cause Samba would look like a kid who stole his dads jacket, so Frenchie was cap

Originally Zheng called the crew "beta" instead of "tender" but they changed it.

Innkeeper deleted scenes:

Everyone's eating soup on deck, roach was supposed to be serving people soup, and Fang says "Ah, Leroy, I'm so glad you're alive?" and Lucius goes "I'm sorry do you think my name is Leroy?"

Oluwande was crying, Jim asks if he was, he says no he gets that thing when he's around grass, and Jim says "A yeah lots of grass around here"

Other deleted scene:

Kristian saying "its sizest" doing big guy stuff

And roach says he's stuck doing tall skinnhy guy stuff

Pete asks if he's stuck doing bald guy stuff

More Deleted scenes:

Ewan zip lines over first and yells: "I was born to fly"

Roach zip line screams quietly cause they tell him to be quiet, and then he lands and says, "why its so sticky I wanna go back", and he tries to get back on the rope but Frenchie flys in and knocks him over.

Another Delete scene:

Wee John was going to dress up as cupid, would have encouraged Stede and Ed, who would have danced to "At Last" and then when and boned.

== Samba BTS ==

In honor of Wee John Wonday's, Samba added some more BTS starring Kristian, and shared the video he talked about in WJW regarding Kristian's birthday.

== Lube As A Crew ==

Astroglide sent @Seven_Sugars a carepackage for a lovely review!

== Stats Stats Stats / Trends ==

Thank you @meowzawowza_ as usual for the awesome insight!

Trends! Thank you @merryfinches and @debphotog for catching these!

== Fan Spotlight ==

For those of you not on twitter, you may not have seen @wndrngnomad's collage's she's been doing each day for the cast members! They go back quite a while so I'll add them all to the repo, but they kind enough to give me permission to share them with the everyone outside of twitter!

== Engagement Prompts ==

Over on Instagram @saveofmdcrewmates have some engagement prompts for tomorrow: #CrossoverCruesday. Time to switch it up! What is your fantasy crossover beween another show and OFMD? Crossover AU anyone?

== Articles ==

Special thanks to @heide79728 on Twitter for sharing all these international headlines!

HBO MAX "praised the loyal audience that engaged with the series and contributed to building an interactive community around it." - Article in Arabic

"14 Recommended Series-fans are already deeply engaged in a massive campaign to encourage another network to buy the rights and produce another season to give the story the ending it deserves" - Article in Hebrew

== Love Notes ==

Hey lovelies.

Have you had any water lately? Did you get to go outside and take a walk? Please remember that you need breaks sometimes, even if they're only a few minutes here or there.

You deserve rest-- and when things get rough, your brain needs a couple minutes to reset. Remember to take care of yourself and practice some self-care.

Self care means fun too!

Do something you enjoy that makes you smile. I'm not a fan of sticker/sticky things-- but I know a lot of people who love googly-eyes so I figured this was appropriate.

Anyway, gnight/gday crew, have a lovely one.

== Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika ==

I think I've done this Darby one on these recaps before, but I needed to have a theme tonight, and the them is well, I think you know. Yes that is Taika in the stash, from "Boy".

#Instagram #ofmd daily recap #ofmd daily recaps #daily ofmd recap #daily ofmd recaps #our flag means death #adopt our crew #save ofmd #ofmd #taika waititi #samba schutte #con o'neill #david fane #joel fry #ewen bremner #rhys darby #ofmd bts

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