Can you Feel my Heart?
The aftermath of the angst yall! Finally some happy happy feels 💖💝💓💕
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Ava had finally been released from the emergency room, passing her cognitive exam with flying colors. Daya says it was because of the promised ice cream at home but Jasmine knew it was because the little girl finally had her mama back. It was insane how calm Jasmine felt the second she saw Daya with Ava in the exam room. When she left rehearsal for a bathroom break and checked her phone, she nearly fainted seeing so many missed calls and text messages. Camden told her everything and she sprinted out of the studio, Ms. Edwards staring in confusion. She would definitely have to text her later she thought, but right now she had to take care of her baby and her lovely partner.
They had just made it back, Ava asleep holding onto Dayas shirt and her koala tightly. Jasmine finally felt like she was back home again. She couldn’t stand to be in the apartment when Daya was gone, everything hurting her heart. Now, it felt like home.
“Alright Ms. Ava, that better be your only time in the ER okay?”
“Considering the fact that she’s a Kennedie, highly unlikely. I broke my first bone at three.” Jasmine laughed, watching how comfortable Ava was with Daya. Jasmine may have been utterly destroyed after Daya left but Ava’s entire world was shattered. That little girl woke up without a word from Daya; no hugs, no kisses, nothing. She couldn’t possibly understand why her mama was gone. Jasmine hated listening to her baby cry for hours, sobbing for the one person she needed most. It was amazing how instantly that changed as soon as Daya held Ava, as if everything had been fixed in a single hug and kiss for the little girl.
“That makes me feel even worse.” Daya said in a deadpan tone. “Guess this little miss thing is living in a bubble forever huh? No more heart attacks for mama.” She suggested, tickling the girl's belly. That was also what made Jasmine's heart swell. Hearing how openly and calmly Daya called herself that title made Jasmine’s heart leap, knowing that Daya must've done some serious soul searching. She was also going to have to thank Camden and Bosco for knocking some sense into her.
“Oh please. She’ll be fine. She has her mama there to protect her.”
“Damn straight.”
“Language.” Jasmine reprimanded. Daya rolled her eyes as Ava yawned.
“Looks like the pain meds are kicking in.” Jasmine said, chuckling at how Ava tried to fight sleep. Daya just smiled and pressed a tiny kiss to her brow.
“I’ll go put her down.” Jasmine knew Daya wanted to do it. She wanted to know that nothing had changed, that Ava didn’t magically get taller, or shorter. She wanted, no needed, to know that this little girl she was holding was still the same little girl. Jasmine came up to Daya and placed her cool hand on her back.
“We can put her down, together.” Jasmine's other arm coming up to wrap around Dayas chest. She squeezed and began to walk, Daya smiling at her.
The nursery was the same. Nothing had changed, not even the open storybook by the rocking chair. Daya couldn’t help but stare in awe at the little Time Capsule the room was. “Wow… it’s like I never left.”
“She wouldn’t sleep in here. She slept in the napper in the bedroom.” Jasmine said, her hand caressing Avas soft downy baby curls. Daya nodded, trying her best not to cry at the thought of her little girl so distraught.
“Can you-“
“On it.“ Jasmine finished. Both nodded and they fell back to their routine. Daya with Ava at the changing table and Jasmine passing her clothes and wipes. Jasmine could cry at how comfortable she felt to be back to it.
Daya laughed, holding up Ava for Jasmine to see. “You kept it?” It, being the shark onesie Daya got her. Jasmine smiled, the onesie still being big on the sleeping baby.
“Only thing she wanted to wear. You wouldn’t believe the stink in that thing.”
“Knowing how messy this little dirt magnet is, I’m surprised this thing isn’t radioactive.” That got Jasmine to nearly keel over in belly laughs. She could see Daya smirk in the corner of her eye as she avoided looking at her dopey smile. Ava started to stir and that’s when Daya brought her to the crib, Jasmine joining her.
“Goodnight Avi girl.” Jasmine whispered, kissing her head thrice and rubbing her incredibly soft baby hands. “Mommy loves you so much.”
“See you soon dragonfly. Love you.” Daya said, kissing the little button nose. She lay Ava down gently in her crib and watched as her arms reached out for her koala, her lips quirking as her hand gripped the plushies grey ear. Jasmine looked at Daya and smiled. She could see everything she was feeling; all the joy, sadness, guilt, but more importantly, all of the love that was just bursting behind those comforting blue eyes. She wrapped her arms around Dayas neck and sighed as Dayas hand crept back to its destined spot on her hip.
“I’m so glad you’re back.” Jasmine said, listening to Dayas heart as she watched her daughters chest rise and fall.
“Me too.” Daya agreed. “I nearly died without you both. It felt like I couldn’t breathe, like my entire world just stopped existing.” Jasmine nodded, knowing the feeling.
“But you came back.” Jasmine said, turning to face Daya in her arms. A tiny smile gracing her lips. Daya chuckled, squeezing tighter on the soft flesh of Jasmine’s hips.
“I did. Because I love you Jasmine, more than life itself. I was an absolute idiot for leaving and I never should’ve left. I’ll never stop loving you or Ava with my whole heart. I’ll never st-“ Daya couldn’t finish the rest before Jasmine cut her off with a tender kiss. Daya was shocked but still kissed back, missing the feel of those holy lips. They pulled away smiling.
“I love you too.” Jasmine said, her heart beating loudly. Daya leaned in for another tender kiss. Her big hand came to cradle her cheek and Jasmine hummed into the kiss. She decided to test the waters and bit on Dayas lower lip. She was not disappointed to hear a groan escape Daya. She inhaled sharply feeling her hands start to roam, feeling as if she’d never touched Jasmine before.
“Daya.” Jasmine breathed. “I need you.”
That was all Daya needed to hear. She picked up Jasmine swiftly, loving how she gasped again. She walked them out of the nursery and towards the bedroom. Jasmine wrapped her legs around Dayas waist as she felt those familiar hands hold on her ass. She pushed open the bedroom door and walked through, kicking it closed.
“Fuck baby, you don’t know how much I missed you.”
“Not nearly as much as I did.” Jasmine said, running her nails through Dayas hair the way she knew she liked. Daya growled and tossed her to the bed, loving her little laugh. Jasmine lifted her head and gasped, feeling her arousal shoot through and make her toes curl. She watched as Daya crawled up the bed, never breaking eye contact, a devilish grin on her lips. Jasmine bit inside her cheek as shivers ran through her. She’d missed this, them. She needed to have Daya and feel her.
“You wanna bet?” Daya asked, stopping as she was face to face with Jasmine. She could feel Dayas hot breath against her own. She leaned down to capture Jasmine's lips in a bruising kiss, sweeping her tongue into Jasmine’s mouth after she moaned hotly. Their hands were tugging and pulling at each other’s clothes like crazed animals.
“Show me.” Jasmine commanded, her heart racing and her cheeks a fine shade of pink.
“With pleasure.” Daya said, her lips traveling down and biting, loving how Jasmine moaned so beautifully. She bit her lip and gripped the sheets tight as Daya traveled lower, eyes level with her covered chest. Her hand snaked around her and ripped the bra, smirking at the tearing sound. Normally, Jasmine would’ve lectured Daya to no end but she didn’t care. She needed her, she needed to feel her and be with her. Dayas shirt was finally off and Jasmine raked her nails over her back, loving the groan Daya gave as she sucked more bruises.
“Daya, I need you, please.” Jasmine whimpered, that sickening heat burning inside her as Daya kissed back up to Jasmine’s lips.
“Let me spoil you baby.” Daya whispered close to Jasmine’s ear. Shivers ran through her as she bit back another loud moan. “I need to make up for lost time.” She could feel Dayas hands snake under the waistband of her pants and she knew she was done for.
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Jasmine lay cuddled into Daya, positively spent. “I missed you.” She whispered, looking up to see an equally exhausted Daya. She laughed and kissed Jasmine’s head. Her arms were wrapped tightly around Jasmine, pulling her close.
“Me too baby.”
Jasmine was so incredibly happy to have Daya back, but she needed something answered; that one little inkling of doubt in the back of her head that wouldn’t go away. She turned to face Daya, obviously nervous. “You never stopped? Loving me and Ava, I mean.” Daya furrowed her brow. She pulled Jasmine up into her arms, taking Jasmine’s hand and squeezing it tightly. She lay Jasmine’s hand against her chest, her heart thumping underneath.
“Can you feel that?” Jasmine nodded.
“My heart only beats for you, Jasmine.” Daya whispered, watching as Jasmine’s eyes watered. “It never stopped because I love you and Ava so much.” She pressed a kiss to Jasmine’s forehead. Jasmine nodded and sniffed, wiping her eyes. She took Dayas other hand, placing it on her own chest to feel the rhythmic thumping.
“Neither did mine.” Jasmine said quietly, tears trickling down her face. Daya smiled, her thumb swiping over Jasmine’s chest. Daya rested her head against Jasmines, closing her eyes and letting the moment wash over her. Jasmine could feel the brightest smile gracing her lips. “I love you so much, Daya.” She tilted her head up and cupped Dayas cheeks, going in for one more soft kiss.
They pulled away, both looking absolutely drunk on love when a shrill cry was heard from across the room that made both girls laugh.
“I’ll go get her.” Daya said, almost bouncing off the bed to get to Ava. Jasmine smiled, loving how Daya practically skipped out of the room. Her eyes widened seeing how red Dayas back was from the scratch marks. Daya came back quickly, cooing to a red-faced Ava. Jasmine wanted to laugh at how quickly Avas cries turned to little hiccups as she cuddled into Dayas chest.
“I think someone just wanted her mama.” Jasmine said, moving closer to Daya. Jasmine giggled, watching how Ava’s eyes closed and her little head rested perfectly against Dayas heart.
“I think so.” Daya said, kissing the baby’s soft curls. She adjusted her hold on Ava, snaking her free arm around Jasmine's waist and pulling her closer. Jasmine hummed and soaked in the warmth radiating from Daya. Daya sighed, kissing Jasmine’s brow once more. “You girls are my world. I feel like I’m back home.”
“You are.” Jasmine added, her own eyes fluttering and trying to hide her yawn. “Now come on, family nap.” Daya laughed and laid down, cradling both of her girls. Jasmine sighed, her hand gripping Dayas tightly as she finally closed her eyes.
She couldn’t explain it, but her heart was full. It was as if that gaping hole that used to be was filled. She was back where she was supposed to be; right there with her daughter and Daya, her partner for life.
She was finally home.
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7 + 10?
7. Is there anything you used to like but can’t stand now?
somehow, and i'm not sure why, but i initially liked casifer? i think it was the reprieve from the hallucifer version and an overwhelming (completely misplaced) sense of relief that pellegrino wouldn't be acting as lucifer, so i rolled with the casifer version quite happily.
now i'm like ?????? i think there's some interesting things about casifer, particularly when he's attempting to pretend to be actual!cas, but mostly the smarm and the exaggerated expressions and all of it are ... Not It.
the thing about a being as powerful as lucifer is that restraint is so much more effective. jared plays lucifer with cool movements and with restraint, and it comes off as chilling. pellegrino played him more that way in s5 as well, alien and calm. i really enjoyed it. i wish this is the approach mischa had taken, since he did a lot to set the tone for later season lucifer with his portrayal, when we could have had a reset from the hallucifer characterization.
10. Most disliked arc? Why?
this is a toss-up for me because i have some real issues with s6-8a, but i think i have to say my most disliked would be the apocalypse world and its fallout. meaning like... half or more of s13-14.
it's just - Bad.
under-realized, at times with weird characterization, it throws mary and bobby together in one of the most awkward side stories to exist on the show, it throws away so much potential for vessels and for what michael could have been, and brings back characters like ketch for us to suffer through even longer for no good reason, and everything it does with the alt-world hunters who live in the bunker is... deeply pointless.
tbh i checked out of most of all that from s12 onward, basically once lucifer was back in play and so poorly written and making crowley lick the floor, and asmodeus was about as interesting (actually less) than if the KFC colonel was written into the show.
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