#so much different from eddie and yet so similar it feels like everything's the same. sigh. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

itsoutrageouss · 2 years

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Can you do an Eddie x reader angst where reader is a cheerleader that has a MASSIVE crush on Eddie. She asked him out but because she’s a cheerleader he thinks it a joke and mocks her etc

a/n: hey sweetheartss- thank you so fkn much for all the love on my last Eddie post. This is sorta similar but a different scenario- hope you enjoy <3

warnings: kinda mean!eddie in the beginning obv, reader feeling humiliated, super mega fluffy cute ending!!!!

Nice fucking try - e. m.

—☕️

He was never at any of the games- which fair enough, why would he be?

Yet you couldn’t help the disappointment when you scanned the crowd for a specific mop of curls with no luck. You had practiced the fuck out of this routine and yet no one would probably be looking at you- they’d all look at chrissy instead.

It was like this often. You’d search for Eddie, and when you finally caught him, you’d sit and watch his sporadic movements and tales, admiring him from afar. He had sent a couple of sweet smiles your way; that was your only lifeline to him and you being a possibility. You were a cheerleader after all, and you knew how the basket team treated people like Eddie. You knew he probably thought the same of you but you were aching to prove him otherwise.

You had to do something about the way your heart was on fire for him, a bird beating itself to death in a cage, a moth around a lamppost- you couldn’t keep letting it burn until there was only ashes left.

You knew he had his usual hellfire club meeting today, and suddenly the routine you were doing was the least of your concerns- you even stepped on someone’s toes in the process but it didn’t matter. You were going for it. You were gonna give him the sweetest smile and the most sincere smile and ask Eddie Munson on a date, no matter what any of your friends thought. No matter to what depths your social status would go. You would risk it for him, you were head over heels after all.

After changing quickly while ignoring the annoyed look from your friends ‘cause of your routine slip up, you hurried to the hellfire club room.

Rocking back and forth in your converse, you leaned against a locker while fiddling with the strap of your gym bag. No sooner did the door fling open and several members left the room, mainly ignoring you or giving you a suspicious side-eye, except Mike who waved to you, since you knew Nancy. She was one of the few people who you trusted with your feelings about Eddie. When all had left, you stepped inside to see Eddie packing up from the campaign.

You didn’t say anything, heart suddenly in your throat and palms sweaty. The fabric of his white t-shirt was stretching over his back and he reached over the table, not yet noticing your presence.

“Eddie?” You asked softly, but he still jumped at your voice, a few dices clattering to the ground. The room was ominously lit, casting amber shadows over his pretty face.

“Uh, yes?” He asked slightly confused- suspicion already bleeding from his tone. He picked the dice off of the floor and continued to pack everything away while you stood.

“I uhm- well I don’t know if you know my name-“

“- y/n, yeah. I know.” He grumbled, not seeming particularly interested in what you had to say. You tried not to let it defeat the courage that had etched into your skin, dripping on your tongue.

“Was it a good… campaign?” You asked with a weary voice. You had secretly picked up a little starter guide to the dice game Eddie seemed so passionate about, to try and understand him better.

He scoffed. What kind of fucking foolery was the jocks up to now?

He didn’t even bother replying, knowing that wasn’t the reason you were here, was probably a fucking trick question already. You cheerleaders were like little heathens.

When he didn’t reply you felt your face flush in embarrassment- had you said something wrong?

“Okay well uh- I was wondering if,” you stuttered, fumbled over all your words as you kept fidgeting with your bag. The bird in the cage surely almost done for. The moth was growing tired.

“- if you’d like to do something with me sometime? Like hangout? On- on a date or something like that?” You asked. Your voice was breathy and the words came out a lot faster and unsure than you would’ve liked.

Finally he diverted his attention to you, his figure turning torturously slow, a finger raised in the air in front of him. “You’re asking me out?” He asked incredulously. He didn’t believe they would try such an old trick on him.

“Nice fucking tryyyy Princess,” he said loudly, voice dragging out the words- in case any of your friends were on the other side of the door laughing their asses off.

“What, you’d take me out to a nice dinner, laugh at my jokes and let me take you home to my scrappy little trailer? Is that what you want?” He laughed humourlessly, tongue rolling around his cheek while he stalked towards you.

“I- I mean that sounds fine to me?” You tried, voice more unsteady than ever. You couldn’t tell what was happening but the bird and the moth were lying helplessly in your heart and hot tears tickled the corners of your eyes.

“That sounds fine to you? I’m not falling for this shit, little witch. Run back to your friends, will ya?” He didn’t even spare you another glance as he finished cleaning the table and flung his leather jacket on.

You stood motionless, throat bobbing in an effort not to cry. He hadn’t just rejected you, he had completely misjudged you with no after thought- discarded you because of prejudices. You stormed out of the room with a horrible mix of rage and shame washing over you.

—☕️

“Something sick happened when all you little sheep left hellfire yesterday,” Eddie began as he placed his lunch tray drown dramatically. He glared over to the jocks table, surprised to instead find you sitting alone, sulking.

“What’s up?” Dustin asked curiously, biting into his apple.

“Little miss y/l/n tried to ask me out yesterday. Tried to humiliate me- but this mighty fucking game master didn’t fall for it,” he said almost proudly, digging into his lunch.

“Woah she asked you out? Was that why she was outside hellfire?” Mike said, voice borderline serious in a way that caught both Dustin and Eddies attention.

“Yes, so? Was expecting me to waltz right into that little trap,” he scoffed.

“Y/n asked you out? Dude she likes you! Seriously- I heard Nance and her talking about it a couple weeks ago in the car. She’s like over the moon for you, man.” Mike gestured around wildly to punctuate his words and their meaning.

Eddie stopped eating instantly, whatever was in his hand clattering to the tray as he looked over to your hunched figure again- head down, not eating, not talking.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck- please tell me you’re joking kid.” He tried desperately, looking between Mike and Dustin who didn’t waver at all. “Nope. No joke. Can’t stop talking about you I swear.”

Eddie buried his head in his hands.

A pretty, nice cheerleader had asked him out- had a fucking crush on him and he mocked her like that? Scared her away? The realisation hit him like a ton of bricks as he dragged his palms over his face and through his hair, reliving the whole experience yesterday; how nervous you had been, how you asked him about this campaign.

Before his mind could prepare him more, he jumped from his seat and ran through the cafeteria, nearly stumbling and drawing all eyes to him as usual.

You looked up, throat twisting into knots as you saw Eddie sit, literally, on his knees on the floor next to the bench where you sat in your solitude.

“Y/n-“ he said, almost out of breath. His eyes were so big and soft, so pleading and glossy, it touched your heart despite the way he broke it yesterday.

“Y/n I’m so sorry. I thought you were messing with me yesterday. Thought it was some kind of joke from your friends or- I didn’t- I didn’t know you meant it but Mike-“ he breathed again, pausing. Everyone was looking at the two of you, your eyes wide at his hasty, guilty confessions.

“Hey, hey-“ you said, placing a hand on his shoulder “-lets uh- go somewhere else, hm?” You tried, standing from the bench. He swallowed loudly before looking around.

“Yeah, yeah okay,” he breathed. When he looked at you then, he swore there was a gleam of something in your eyes.

It was hope.

You took his warm hand and dragged him out into the hall, ignoring the mocking from where your former friends sat. Where you used to be.

Eddie stuck his tongue out devilishly as you passed them before disappearing into the silent hall with you.

“Hi,” you said then, a soft smile splaying on your lips. It made Eddie’s insides flutter, knowing you were being genuine.

“Hey,” he replied with a huff, a broad grin adorning his features now too.

“I’m sorry-“ he began again but you cut him off quickly; his dramatic cafeteria gesture was enough of an apology to you, and you couldn’t even blame him for thinking like that with you being a part of the cheer squad.

“It’s okay, Eddie. I know I don’t seem like the type, but I promise you I- I think I really like you,” you confessed nervously, eyes darting around the tile floor “and I’m not friends with those dickheads anymore. Swear.”

The bird was beating around the cage, wilder and wilder and the moth dances excitedly around the bright burning lamppost.

“So the offers still- its still on?” He asked hopefully. You couldn’t possibly resist those puppy dog eyes he flashed you, the way his hands fidgeted with the rings adorning his slender fingers.

You nodded eagerly, not daring to believe any of this was really happening. “I’m not much for dinners, though” you added. He laughed. A warm sound you could see yourself getting very used to.

“Me neither. We’ll figure something out, hm?” He asked rhetorically, head tilting to the side to peer down at your hopeful face. Your expression made the guilt from yesterday wash away from his conscience, albeit slowly. God you were gorgeous, and he had half a mind to believe he was dreaming in this moment.

“It’s a date, then.” You stated. Before he could reply, you raised to your tiptoes and kissed his cheek gently.

A furious red blush crept up on his cheek and neck, his lips parted in surprise.

“Yeah. Yeah, it’s uh- it’s a date,” he smiled, flustered as he squeezed your hand.

So damn gorgeous, he thought.

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tawaifeddiediaz · 4 months

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something about the diaz home as a symbol of everything sacred to eddie.

something about the diaz home representing eddie's privacy and his life and by extension, christopher's, and that it's a constant, recurring motif of a life that he's built with his son. and it's always interesting to see that his home is always warm (in terms of lighting, color combos, etc etc) and welcoming, which feels so vastly different to the other two homes we've seen for him in eddie begins

something about the way he has to physically open the door to let people in to his life, and how many shots of that we've had of just him opening the damned door since. something about the way he physically lets shannon in in 2x07, or the way he braces himself with chris' encouragement before opening the door to ana in 4x08, or the way he happily lets carla in in 4x13 or the way he softens and smiles when he opens the door to buck in 6x12. it's in the way the only people we've really seen in eddie's home as "not guests" are the ones that he chooses to let in.

in that same vein, we can always tell when there's someone in there that doesn't quite belong. 5x11 is a prime example of this, and not just because of the episode title, "outside looking in." it's evidently obvious that the only reason taylor's in his house is for buck's sake, and maybe that's why we never see eddie actually letting them in. 5x03 is similar to that, in the sense that ana stays for three days with chris at the diaz home, but when eddie comes back, it's a metaphorical and physical mess that he's left standing in the middle of, alone.

and it's very, very interesting that we've never seen his parents in his house. ever. and yes, it could just be the fact that they rarely come to los angeles period, but i just think it's interesting in terms of eddie's journey with them, that the closest we've gotten to them physically being there is that facetime call with his dad, and that phone call with his mom - both of which happen after he goes back to texas in 5x17 where he point-blank tells his dad he's trying to be better for himself, and his dad meets him halfway. it only happens after his relationship with his dad starts improving.

i just constantly think of the diaz home front door, and now that i've thought of it, there's so many other moments that scream at me:

buck unlocking eddie's door in 4x14 and swinging it open to the party, and then later standing in the open doorway almost like he's protecting eddie and the life he's built in this one way because he couldn't protect him in the other way

buck unlocking eddie's door with his own key in 5x13, then bursting through yet another door to get to eddie, just to step in and sit with him in his grief - and how much that scene symbolizes that eddie may have built this life but it was after burying demons that later just crawled up through the cracks of his new home.

buck standing inside the diaz home after eddie gets home from therapy in 5x14 like this is a regular occurrence.

the way eddie's discomfort is visible in that split second scene we get of the police officers storming his home in 2x15

eddie asking shannon to leave through the back door because he may have let her into his life but he's not ready to let her into chris' and thus, he doesn't truly let her into his life - and actually, even the shot of eddie, chris and shannon at the end of that episode takes place outside the diaz home. which is...telling methinks.

eddie opening his door post-date in 4x07 to buck meeting him at it (always meeting him halfway), and just. the domesticity of it, set off by the warm lights, the discussion they have, and the looks on their faces the whole like

eddie opening his door to buck in 6x12, looking apprehensive for a second before he realizes who it is and his smile grows and eyes turn into heart-eyes and buck just pushes past him without waiting for eddie to step aside, only to go and swing his feet up on the coffee table like the diaz home is his, too.

there's so many examples but @sevensoulmates and i put this whole meta together because the symbolism in this tv show is off the charts

#zee rambles #meta #911 abc #911 on abc #eddie diaz #is some of this a reach? probably #do i care? no #because fr it's so bold of a motif to use the diaz home as a symbol for eddie and it's not just house is a home #it's also my home is my heart and you are my home and here's my heart #idk #it's a lot of things at once #there's a complete separate meta about the buddie implications of this all #and from a visual standpoint there's something about the fact that eddie clearly prefers lamp and warm lighting (as he should)#we rarely see overhead lighting used and that's just...that #long post #i should be writing my midterm rn but alas

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tastefulstars · 11 months

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Of Wolf and Man 4/?

steve harrington x f!reader x eddie munson

a/n: all 4 parts total 14.6k words and we've just gotten a kiss, we're moving up in the world lads.

w/c: 3.9k

warnings: 18+ only mdni. slow burn. r is a werewolf. body horror. mutual pining. body horror. grief. angst. hurt/comfort. pov change halfway. r is Going Through It. eddie and steve take care of r. not proof read. kidnapping. violence. murder. blood/gore + descriptions of the aftermath of torture.

masterlist

part one / two /three

tags: @steddieloverrr @cherrycolas-things @5sosjay

You've always dealt with pain, you have to being what you are but this was a new level. There wasn't a moment of the day where you weren't in agony, longing for it to stop.

Your arms and wrists burned from the chains holding you, your flesh bubbling and tearing under the silver. Your legs were adorned with cuts, varying in length and depth and the hunters sprinkled something over the wounds to stop you from healing too quickly.

Your back was a mess of torn flesh and gaping wounds from the whippings they subjected you to daily.

Everything hurt and ached, and you weren't sure how much more you could take.

It had only been a couple of days since the hunters took you. You knew Steve and Eddie and the rest of the group would be looking for you, that they'd probably gone to Hopper and Joyce for help, you just had to find a way to hold on.

"This one isn't breaking as quick as the others" One of the men mutters to his companions, his voice making your skin crawl.

"Does it matter? It'll break eventually. They always do."

"And, means more fun for us"

You wanted to hurl at their tone, at their voices, wanted to lash out and break free and go home. You waited, lost in your memories of Steve and Eddie and your parents, knowing that either they'd get bored and kill you or your boys would find you.

Another couple of days go past in a blur of blood and agony when you realize the hunters had made a mistake.

The youngest had been put on watch for the evening while the others rested, only he hadn't secured your chains properly and there was enough slack for you to slip out of them. You knew you wouldn't have another opportunity to escape them so you waited, watching as the hours ticked past and he started yawning, his eyes slipping closed.

You ignored the pain and carefully slipped your restraints. Your heart in your throat and you held your breath as you crept over to the hunter.

He barely had time to react before your hands were gripping his head tightly, twisting and snapping his neck, the noise bringing bile to your throat. It was a quick death and not one he deserved, but it was quiet.

You crept to his companions, each one suffered a similar fate - a crushed throat or suffocated with a pillow. They all died quickly and you resented it, wishing you could have taken your time - made them suffer for the pain they caused you, for the deaths of your parents and so many others.

You stumbled away from them, hands shaking and vision swimming with unshed tears. You didn't want to be the killer they thought you to be. You hated wanting to inflict pain and suffering on others - no matter how much they deserved it.

Your wounds weren't healing yet and you knew you couldn't stay here. You look around for something to cover yourself, not wanting someone seeing your flayed back, cut up body and wanting to help but you can't see anything besides the hunters jackets and the idea of putting on their clothes made you want to scream.

You grind your teeth and decide to risk it. There was so much blood covering you, so it wouldn't make much difference. You stumble out of the warehouse, distantly realizing that it was the same one that you crawled out of the upside down of all those months ago.

You walk.

Rocks and sticks tear at the soles of your feet and each step was agony. Tears seep down your cheeks, creating tracks through the blood staining your skin.

You walk.

It feels like hours, but eventually, you shuffle closer to your home. The houses of your neighbors creep closer and closer and you nearly sob in relief when you see your house.

Steve's car was parked in the driveway, and you could hear too many heartbeats and voices inside, and you know that all of your friends are there.

You steel yourself, taking a deep breath before you push open your door and walking inside.

The noise stops.

You turn, and everyone is there - Steve and Eddie and Robin, Nancy, Jonathan, Hopper and Joyce, Max, El, Mike, Will, Lucas, and Dustin. You could have laughed at their stunned and horrified expression if you weren't so tired.

"Oh my god," Joyce breathes out, and you let go of the lungful of air you were holding.

You move, hands shaking as you reach for a pack of smokes that were thrown on the table and taking one and lighting it.

"I'm gonna shower," you say, voice muffled around the cigarette stick, and you leave everyone in a stupor for your bathroom.

You keep your eyes lowered when you enter, not wanting to see the absolute carnage that was your body.

You stand under the cold spray of water, watching blood swirl around your feet and down the drain, when the door creaks open and you're overwhelmed with the scents of Eddie and Steve.

"Honey?" Eddie's voice is small and worried, and your lower lip trembles.

"Smoking in the shower was a bad idea." You choke out and Eddie slides the door open, plucking the wet cigarette out of your fingers and tossing it into the sink.

Eddie's hands grip yours tightly, holding onto you while you cry silently.

Steve moves closer and begins to gently wash your body. Fingers careful and slow, ensuring he wasn't putting any pressure on your slowly healing wounds. He peels your undies down your legs and tosses them into the sink along with the abandoned smoke.

"We've got you," Eddie murmurs, "we've got you, love."

Eddie holds onto you while Steve cleans you and when the water stops running with blood, they wrap themselves around you.

You sob into their chests and arms and they hold you through it until your breathing settles and you sway in their arms, your legs giving out on you and there's a knock at the door.

"We're comin', hang on" Eddie calls.

He gently passes you to Steve and steps out of the shower, reaching around the two of you to turn off the water. Steve lifts you easily, cradling you to his chest and hums when Eddie places a towel over your form, tucking it around you carefully to ensure you were covered.

You close your eyes and listen to Steve's heartbeat, strong and there, against your cheek. Eddie's voice soothes you as he talks to Hopper, your pain easing the longer they're with you.

"Hop, just give her a minute," Eddie's saying as he follows Steve to your room.

"It's been nearly an hour, Munson" Hopper sighs, "I need to know what happened and make sure nothing's going to cause problems."

Eddie turns and glares at him.

"No. It can wait until we've dressed her wounds and she's got clothes on" He snaps, shutting the door in Hoppers face.

You hear Hopper sigh and mutter about damn stubborn kids before retreating back to the living room with the others.

Steve sits you down on the edge of your bed, carefully patting you dry with the towel. He's so gentle with you and your heart shatters, tears welling, and you're not sure what you did to deserve it.

Eddie sits on the bed, angled behind you and begins to inspect your back, inhaling sharply.

"Shit"

You don't notice the desperate look he sends Steve but you feel Steve moving and his quick intake of breath.

A hand cups your cheek and it takes everything in you to pry open your eyes. Steve's face is an open book for his concern, worry written plain for you to see.

"Bug, we- your. Your back is healing which is great, but there's some. Most of the wounds have knitted back together right? But there's some skin that's - we might need to cut it off"

His voice is wavering but soft, his thumb strokes your cheek as he talks. Your mind is numb and you trust him and Eddie so you nod.

Steve's eyes are warm and filled with love and you watch him as Eddie begins cleaning up your back. Steve and Eddie murmur to you, soft nothings that wash over you and settles your brain into a mindless buzzing.

"All done, Baby" Eddie murmurs as he finishes wrapping your torso with bandages, tying it off and tucking the excess.

You glance over your shoulder and wish you hadn't. Eddie had placed an old towel behind you and it was covered in scraps of your flesh and bloody bandages.

"Here" Steve's hands gently lift your calf and you feel the soft fabric of your pants slide against your skin. They work quickly to dress you in loose comfortable clothes and clean up the mess.

"You okay to talk to Hopper?" Eddie asks, pressing a kiss against your shoulder.

"Just him, please" Your whisper, eyes on the floor. Shame fills you as you remember your actions, what you did. Your head falls and you cover your face with your hands.

You don't hear Eddie and Steve leaving, or Hopper entering the room, and you startle when a hand comes to rest on your shoulder. Your head snaps up and your heart leaps into your throat before you realize you're still safe, that Hopper wouldn't hurt you.

"You alright, kid?"

His voice is gruff and your face falls, tears welling in your eyes and you can't stop your body from shaking. You shake your head 'no' and Hopper's arm wraps around your shoulder, pulling you into his side.

"What happened?"

His voice held no judgement and you took a deep breath, pulling away from him and sitting up as straight as you could with your injuries.

"Did the others tell you everything I've told them?" You ask, not really wanting to talk about your entire life story right now and he nods, "Okay. Okay. They found me, knew where I'd been for a while I guess, took me to the old steelworks."

You absentmindedly rub at the healing burns that wrap around your wrists and forearms as you speak, feeling the raised skin under your fingertips.

"They're dead, Hop" You admit quietly, "They killed my parents and now they're dead."

"Tell me what happened" He matches your volume, keeping his voice soft.

You do, you tell him everything that had happened over the past few days, from the moment they busted down your door to stumbling back home covered in your own blood, and he listens until you're stumbling over your words and falling silent.

He sighs deeply, hand coming back to rest on your shoulder.

"Kid, listen to me" He leans forward and catches your eye, "It was them or you, alright? Like you said, they would have killed you and you ain't gotta feel guilty for doing what you had to to survive."

Hopper pauses, waiting for you to acknowledge his words with a small nod.

"Alright. Now, I don't want you to worry about this, I'll take care of the steelworks. You just stay here and heal, let those boys take care of you, okay? I'll take care of it."

You nod again and relief floods through you, making your body sag. Hopper pats your arm and grunts as he wanders out of the room. You lay down, knowing that Steve and Eddie would make their way back to you soon. Your eyes slip closed and you feel your exhaustion slam into you like a truck.

When they'd arrived to your front door kicked in and the coffee table knocked over, it took every ounce of self control to not freak out. Eddie carefully stepped through your living room, calling your name and Steve was reaching for the phone - intent on calling for Hopper because he knew what this meant and he needed help.

He's not surprised when the kids show up not too long after the phone call, El's guilty face greeting his.

"I heard you and Dad talking" She says softly, "We want to help, he'll be here soon."

Sure enough, Steve spots the cruiser pulling up behind his own car and he just sighs and lets them in. Eddie's sitting on the couch, knee bouncing rapidly as he chews on his thumbnail. Steve meets his eyes and see's his own fear reflected back at him.

Steve sits heavily on the couch beside him and hooks his fingers with Eddies, leans on him in a quiet show of support.

"Alright, what's the emergency?" Hopper asks, frowning at the gathered group.

Steve takes a deep breath, squeezes Eddie's fingers, and talks. He tells Hopper everything you had told them months ago, about the hunters, how you'd warned them of what they could do, and how they'd come over to the front door kicked in and you missing.

The kids take over once he finishes, explaining their experiments to test your abilities and ideas on what to do to find you, making Hopper pinch the bridge of his nose before growling at them all to be quiet.

There's not much they can do, besides driving around town and looking for places that you might have been taken. Hopper instructs the kids to go home, not do anything stupid, that he'd look into it and ushered everyone out.

Eddie's eyes are glassy and his lashes clumped together with tears, his lower lip trembled and Steve felt his heart break in his chest.

Steve cups his head and wraps his other arm around Eddie, cradling him in his arms and he feels his own tears wetting his cheeks.

"Can't loose her again" Eddie's voice trembles, wet and broken, "Stevie, I can't- we can't loose her. Not again, we just got her back."

"I know, honey" He murmurs into Eddie's hair, "She'll come back to us."

They cling to each other for a few moments before Eddie pulls away, wiping at his eyes and sniffing.

"We need to go find her" He says, standing and pulling at Steve's hands.

They drive for hours, Eddie practically hanging out the window like it could help him see better, with no luck. They stumble back into your home in the early hours of the morning, collapsing into your bed with aching hearts.

The following days pass in much the same manner, driving around town trying to find you and collapsing in bed together - wrapped around each other with clinging hands.

The group gathers again, Hopper bringing Joyce into the fold and updates everyone with what he's found - a couple of new face's had been seen around town but there wasn't many more leads when the door creaks open and you stumble in, looking like you'd stepped in a shower of blood.

You were practically naked, skin cut open and torn all over, and you take one of Joyce's smokes and mutter about a shower and limp down the hall.

Steve and Eddie shoot up and follow you, acid rising up the back of their throats as they take in the mess that was your back. They hold you as you sob and clean you, Eddie nearly throws up when he gets a better look at your back.

His hands shake as he lays out a towel behind you and puts on a pair of gloves. He dry heaves as picks up a pair of scissors taken from your first aid kit, and gently lifts a piece of skin that was hanging off you and begins to cut.

You looked like you'd been shredded. Your back torn apart and knitted back together with bits of flesh hanging. Anger burns hot through his veins at the men who tore you apart like this and he clenches his jaw, not wanting to accidently hurt you.

By the time he's done, there's a small pile of your skin on the towel and he drops the scissors onto the mess - intending on throwing the whole lot out once he's done.

He continues to patch you up, wrapping you in gauze and bandages until every inch of the still healing wounds were dressed and covered.

It takes a while but he patches you up and helps Steve dress you and you talk to Hopper, and then everyone's gone again.

Steve's standing in the doorway to your room, watching you sleep when Eddie's arm encircle him and his chin rests on Steve's shoulder.

"Should we wake her? She'll need to eat" He murmurs, staring at you unblinkingly.

"Let her rest for a bit," Steve whispers back, stepping towards you and pulling Eddie along with him.

They gently climb into bed with you, putting you securely between them. Steve's arms wrap around you and Eddie, who tangles his legs with yours. You snuffle, snuggling deeper into their embrace.

Eddie and Steve quietly hold you and each other while you sleep, taking comfort in your soft breathing. They lay there for hours, watching you, watching the wounds still visible close and fade into light scars, until you sniff - nose scrunching and a soft groan slips from your lips.

"Baby?" Steve whispers and your eyes open, flickering between them.

"Stevie" You answer, just as quiet, "Eds"

"God, Honey" Eddie breathes out, "no more disappearing okay?"

"Yeah, I think I can do that"

Your lips twitch into a small smile and Eddie's chest grows three sizes and he's leaning closer, pressing his lips against yours in a soft kiss. You make a little noise of surprise before pressing back into the kiss, your hand sliding up Eddie's arm and tangling in his hair.

Eddie presses a couple of quick pecks against you before pulling away and Steve's hand is cupping your cheek and then he's kissing you. He's not as soft as Eddie, kissing deeper and messier.

He pulls away when your stomach growls loud enough to hear and you groan.

"'m so hungry" You mutter, realizing just how long it's been since you ate last and how much energy you were burning through while healing.

Eddie springs up from the bed, gathering you up and wrapping his hand around Steve's.

"Should we order in or cook?" Eddie asks as he leads you and Steve to the kitchen, "what do you want, Baby?"

"Don't care, Eds" You say, peering into the fridge.

"How about you two go relax and I'll put something together for us?" Steve offers, soft smile gracing his face and Eddie smiles back before pressing a kiss against Steve's lips and pulls you to the couch.

You practically climb into Eddie's lap, almost purring in contentment when he wraps his arms around you and holds you tightly. You let your eyes slip closed and press your nose against Eddie's neck, breathing him in and listening to Steve in the kitchen.

You relax, the sounds and smells of your boys filling you with a complete sense of safety and home that you feel yourself going limp, your heart slowing, matching Steve's and Eddies.

Steve's hand gently strokes your arm and you lift your head, eyes half closed and feeling a little drunk from Eddie's scent. He sits flush beside Eddie and you slide over to his lap, wanting to bury your face in his neck and drink him in as well but you're stopped with gentle but firm hands on your waist.

"You gotta eat first, Bug" Steve tells you, voice fond and warm and you want nothing more than to just crawl into them and live there forever.

You look at the food and realising just how hungry you were, you practically inhaling the food much to the boys' amusement. Steve rubs your back, hand warm against your newly healed skin.

"Still hungry?" He asks, already slipping you back to Eddie's lap and moving back to the kitchen to fetch more food for you.

"Need lots of food" You mutter around a mouthful, "takes a lot to heal like this"

"I'm going to order something" Eddie states, sliding out from under you and joining Steve in the kitchen.

You're not really sure how much exactly you eat but you watch your boys faces go from amusement to incredulous, their eyebrows creeping higher the more you eat. You sigh and lean back into the couch, hand patting your stomach.

"Alright, I feel better"

Eddie laughs and you feel your lips curling into a smile and Steve kisses your temple, murmuring a quiet 'good' against your skin.

"I- You don't have to worry about this happening again" You admit, knowing they would want answers but not pressuring you into talking before you were ready, "They're um, I. They're dead."

Eddie takes your hand and Steve holds your thigh, their touches grounding you and you nod.

"Yeah, I. I don't think I'll have to worry about hunters again"

"Are they the only ones?" Steve asks quietly, not wanting to upset you.

"Probably not" You concede, "but they were the only ones who seemed intent on y'know, hunting I guess. I've never heard of any issues with any other groups."

"Either way," Eddie starts, squeezing your hand, "we'll be with you."

"Hmm, yeah." Steve agrees, "we're not letting you out of our sight ever again, Bug."

Something settles inside you and you're overwhelmed with how much you love them, how much you feel like you belong with them. You feel your wolf simmering under your skin and you know you'd need to shift in the next day or two after so violently suppressing the change over the past few days.

Your knee starts to bounce without you noticing and Steve gently holds it.

"You okay, honey?"

"Yeah. I just-" You don't finish your sentence, feeling like you had ants crawling under your skin and memories of the hunters voices flash through your mind, "I. It's a lot, I don't know."

"Do, would changing help?" Eddie asks, resting his cheek against your shoulder.

"Yeah, I think so," you admit, "everything's always simpler when I'm a wolf. Easier."

"Then, let's go downstairs, yeah?"

"Wait-" Eddie's voice stops you in your tracks before you reach the basement door. He starts rushing around the room, collecting pillows and blankets and snacks until his arms are full and he can barely see over his load.

"Might as well make it cosy," He says, voice muffled behind a pillow. Steve laughs softly and pulls a few items from him, helping carry the items.

Your stomach flutters at their easy acceptance, and you knew that you'd never love anyone the way you love these two. Completely and all consuming. They were a balm to all your agonies and a light in the dark.

Your throat closes up, chest tight with the weight of your emotions.

They worked together to create a little nest of blankets and pillows while you strip, letting the change take over and its the first time in a very long time that the shift doesn't have you screaming in pain.

You shake out your fur and huff, trotting over to your boys and sticking your nose into Steve's neck, making him yelp and Eddie laugh.

You wait for them to sit, curled into each other before you wrap your large form around them and settle in for the night.

Your mind and body settles, and the only thing that runs through your thoughts was home love mine home safe home home home.

#stranger things imagine #stranger things x reader #stranger things x you #eddie munson #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #steve harrington #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steddie x reader #steddie x you #werewolf #steve harrington x eddie munson #eddie munson x steve harrington #steve x reader x eddie #story:owam

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withlovemark · 2 years

Text

everywhere.

warning: i noticed someone put cliffhanger last time so yes, this one also has a cliffhanger, brace yourselves. and angst! oops

pairing: steve x female reader

words: 6.3k (this is barely edited, im sorry, im still under a time constraint)

settings: s4 vol 2 except it's a bit different (light spoilers!)

an: i honestly just sat down and wrote for 2 days straight so yall are getting this earlier than promised. i think i've tricked myself into thinking this is a masterpiece lmfao. enjoy reading! and thank you so much for the kind words! <3 please feel welcome to send more in! im a slut for validation lol

one. two.

three.

a crunching sound makes its way to your ears, replacing fleetwood mac, as soon as you make contact with the ground.

mike’s player - broken.

the vine unwrapped itself, freeing you after it has served its only purpose. branches rapidly piling on the portal above you and blocking you from view.

“you can’t leave, y/n,” a dark whisper causes you to stand up, eyes swiftly inspecting the room you just had the privilege of leaving. vecna comes into view, slowly walking towards you, like he had all the time in the world. bastard.

“don’t worry, you still have time, i just want to show you something,” you run, seeking safety in what you thought would be eddie’s room. it wasn’t. instead you were watching a little boy seated on a laboratory chair, the numbers 001 being etched onto his skin. so similar to the ones you’ve seen on eleven. ‘what the hell?’

“all done. not so bad, was it?” the man you’ve only heard off from the rest, now seated right in front of the boy, Dr. Brenner.

“see, there’s nothing to be afraid of, is there… y/n?” the sound of your name passing through his lips snaps you back, “why don’t you take a seat?” he continues, his voice distorting and morphing into the one that sends goosebumps throughout your skin. you quickly run out of the room, hoping to be back in eddie’s trailer yet things never go your way.

standing, now, in the middle of what seems to be a hospital. the flickering lights, the blood splattered walls and the numerous dead bodies greeting you. you immediately run towards the exit, just your luck – blocked.

“y/n… what are you doing?” it’s him again, the same malicious voice. “it’s not time for you to leave,” he’s getting closer and closer and you can hear your heart thumping in your chest.

“s-steve!,” you call out, just wanting to be as far away from there as possible, “steve! help! please!!” pounding on the blocked door, you knew that it was useless. that no matter how much you plead, no one will hear you.

“now that you’ve seen where i’ve been, i would like very much to show you where i am going,” his voice is much closer now. you desperately try to rid the barricaded door of the pieces of wood attached to it, finally making your way through.

and when you thought things couldn’t get worse, you're face to face with Dr. Brenner once again, “take a seat, y/n,” his white, glossy eyes boring into your soul before you were suddenly yanked and wrapped into a laboratory chair, tentacles tightening around your arms and legs.

you’re trapped. there's nowhere to go. vecna was making his way closer and closer, his heavy breathing getting louder and louder, occupying every corner of your mind, “i want you to tell eleven, i want you to tell her…everything you see,” he darkly whispers, bringing his scrawny. branch-like fingers up to your head, showing you the future, “no!,” you screech.

the clock, chiming. a portal, large enough to destroy hawkins, opening. steve, robin, max, lucas, dustin, nancy, eddie, all dead.

“tell…her…everything,” vecna continues and you can’t help but feel like you’ve already lost.

in a second, you were back in eddie’s trailer, still in the upside down, tears slipping freely from your tired eyes as you tried to catch your breath. you need to get back. to warn the others of what's about to come. but the portal above you was still tightly shut.

how dare he not open it for you after giving you a task? frustrated, you try and think of where an open portal could be.

and then you heard them, through the other side.

–

they try to come up with a plan of rescue. your anguish yell when you fell through the portal was the only sound replaying in steve’s mind as he tried to listen in to the suggestions that were falling around the group.

“we can’t go back to lover’s lake, that gate is blocked” eddie announces, recollecting the memories of the bats that are now guarding the portal.

“ok, well, does anyone know where freddie died?” max asks. the group shares unknown glances, all afraid to make eye contact with the despaired boy. steve feels more hopeless with every second that passes.

but then the lamp beside him flickers.

“y/n?” it flickers once again, capturing the group's attention. “y/n! is that you?! if it’s you tap it three times!,” he yells through the walls, hoping to god you were there.

the light flickers, exactly three times. steve feels relief wash all over him, knowing that you were still alive. he needs to get to you. now.

“w-we’re coming to get you, okay!” he continues, feeling a little crazy that he was yelling at a lamp. “just stay safe and wait for me, i will be there!,” he reassures you and himself. the light flickers once again, letting him know that you heard every word. he looks back at the group, hoping someone knows what the next step is.

“i uh know the general vicinity...” nancy declares, “it’s around this area, just pass the woods,” at that, steve immediately dashes out of the trailer, the group right on his heels.

–

you hear the sounds of their footsteps getting further and further away. running out of eddie’s trailer, you grabbed the bike you were once on, speeding out of there and back into the dark forest.

it doesn’t take much effort for you to find the portal in the middle of the road, exactly where freddie died but only because another set of vines were rapidly piling on top of it, just like the ones in eddies trailer. you curse vecna in your head.

he wanted you to disseminate information yet he can’t even let you out of here? the whole situation is stupidly annoying and you wish you could just march up to him and give him an ugly slap across the face.

“what is your game!?” you yell out to the skies above you, not even caring about what kind of monsters lie in this world, those that could possibly hear you.

“you want me to tell eleven, don’t you!?” the skies grumble, like it was responding to you. “then let me out!,” you cry.

like some sort of miracle, the portal opens.

the familiar face of the boy you love immediately comes into view, “y/n, i’m here, let’s go!,” he says hurriedly as you run towards him, hands intertwining with his. however, instead of the warmth you usually feel when steve was around, coldness enveloped your fingers. his fingers feeling like branches. you look up at his hollow, white eyes.

“well, are you going to save us, y/n?” he taunts you. you can’t help but feel like this is all some sort of sick joke, “are you finally going to do something or are you just going to expect us to save you…like you do all the time?,” he continues, his voice now unrecognizable.

“i-im trying,” you whimpered.

why was vecna still torturing you?

“you’re useless and you really believe i could love you back?,” he continues taking jabs at your heart. you know it’s vecna but the fact that these words are slipping from the lips of the man you love makes it hard for you to disassociate his face from his words. you continue to cry out for help, trying to wriggle yourself out of his hold.

–

“we’ve been walking down this same road nancy, are you sure it’s here?,” steve's impatient. his leg bouncing as he inspects the location that they found themselves in for the umpteenth time.

“i could’ve sworn it was here,” nancy muttered, confused.

robin starts wandering around until she spots a similar view, “guys!, it’s here!,” she called out. the rest of the group making their way towards her, right in front of the portal that looked exactly like the one in eddie’s trailer, “you’ve got to be kidding me,” eddie comments, looking at steve, who had the same hopeless look as before.

“y/n are you here? can you hear me?” steve calls out into the air, desperate for some sort of sign from you. the group looks around, trying to see if any of the street lights would flicker, assuring them of your existence.

it does.

various lights start flickering at a godly speed, signaling the group that it was no longer you on the other side. simultaneously, nancy is pulled away from reality, causing the group to burst into chaos. she sees the same visions that vecna shared with you. and then she sees you, on the other side, hand wrapped around vecnas, “y/n!,” she yells for you, trying to catch your attention. she hears vecna taunting you, your whimpers, your cries for help.

“don’t you see, nancy,” vecna calls out to her for the first time, causing the hairs on her arms to rise.

“the power of guilt is the strongest of all.”

“nance!,” steve’s voice snaps her back to reality, her consciousness slowly creeping back in as she stared back at the boy, “i saw her,” she admits.

the group hurriedly made their way back to eddie's trailer, it’s not exactly safe to have a suspect just roaming around the streets. nancy explained everything she saw. vecna’s past, the future he has planned, and the present of the upside down, which involves you.

they figure out vecna’s plan – four kills, four gates, end of the world.

“if that’s true, he’s only one kill away,” dustin spoke, fear rising throughout the room.

“so why hasn’t he killed her then?” lucas asks the question that was playing in everyone's minds, “y/n could be the fourth kill and then he wins… what’s stopping him?”

“that’s the thing, he’s feeding off of her, increasing her guilt to make him stronger,” nancy claimed, sympathetically looking at steve.

it was all too much for the boy. he gets up from the comfort of the couch, walking out of the trailer, trying to collect his feelings, desperately wanting to avoid a second mental breakdown. every second away from you is eating him away. the fact that he’s here, sitting on the steps of eddie’s trailer, safe, angers him. he should’ve held on to you. he should’ve paid more attention.

his thoughts were disrupted when a certain red head called out to him, “hey!”

quickly, steve wipes away the tears that have made their way upon his cheeks, “just give me a minute, okay, max, i just need some time,” he pleads with the girl.

“we don’t really have a lot of that left,” she replies apologetically, carefully taking a seat next to him. “she told me about her visions,” she starts, capturing steve’s attention. max indulges in him, the information you’ve only shared with her. starting with your visions of will and then of steve.

“he’s using you… to get to her… convincing her that you can never love her,” max concludes. steve feels nothing but dread. maybe if he just told you what he felt a little earlier then vecna would’ve never gotten to you. maybe the both of you would be in his car right now, just laughing about everything and anything, his hand tightly wrapped around yours as you place quick, small kisses on the back of his hand. but you weren’t there and he has no idea if you were okay.

to think that he thought max was there to comfort him.

letting out a shaky breath “that…that’s not true,” he sounds so broken. he can’t even imagine what you were going through, “i-i love her more than i’ve ever loved anyone else,” he admits, causing a sad smile to form on the red headed girl.

“so then stop moping around and prove it to her,” she gives him a hard stare. he doesn’t need to be told twice. in a second, he’s back in eddies trailer. for the second time, the group comes up with a more stable plan.

get a car. buy a gun. find a portal. rescue you. kill vecna.

it shouldn't be that hard?

–

you’re running.

visions after visions attacking you.

just a second ago, vecna had embodied your father. the same father that abandoned you when you were six years old. sputtering sentences like, “ever since you were born, you ruined your mother and i’s relationship,” and “you’re so hard to love, that’s why i left!” every single word adding sins to your contaminated heart.

before that you were at the gym, trying to find comfort in the place you’ve spent the most days in. vecna found a way to taint that memory too. chrissy cunningham making an appearance in the middle of the room, looking straight in your eyes, pleading, lips quivering “why didn’t you help me?” “i would still be alive if you just tried harder!”

each voice, always distorting into the intrusive yet familiar sound that you fall for every time. fear enveloping your soul at every moment.

now, you’re here, facing your home. just wanting to be able to breathe, even for just a second. you just want the pain to stop.

time has been lost on you, you’re not exactly sure how long you’ve been down here. it could be a couple of days? or maybe just a few hours? all you know is that you’re so tired. entering your home, your footsteps carry you into the comfort of your own bed. laying there, just for a while, you tell yourself, staring at the ceiling, trying to calm the erratic beating of your heart.

at this point, you’ve run out of tears to cry. eventually, you doze off, hoping to god that this was all a bad dream. that when you wake up tomorrow, steve’s arms will be around you, the sun shining brightly out the window, your alarm clock signaling the start of the next day.

–

surprisingly enough, the group didn’t have much trouble getting a car, well, in this case.a camper van, thanks to eddie who was taught how to hotwire by his father. steve drives it like a madman, not caring about its exterior, just wanting you to be seated on the passenger side, instead he was comforted by his ex-girlfriend.

“hey, we’ll get her back,” nancy breaks him out of his thoughts, another sympathetic smile directed at him, “you can’t lose her, remember,” nancy reaffirms, encouraging the boy to not lose hope. he sends her a grateful smile before his eyes were once again, focused on the road.

the group are now buying guns, explosives and everything else they thought might come in handy. still a pretty easy step. until jason carver spots steve harrington.

“harrington,” he calls out, gun in hand.

“carver,” steve nods, barely acknowledging his presence. of course they knew each other, they were once in the same basketball team.

“have you seen y/n?” he asks the brown haired boy. your name slipping from the boys lips leaves a sour taste in steve’s mouth. he never wants him to say it again. in fact, he never wants him near you.

“no…why are you looking for her?,” steve lied.

“i have to say sorry to her,” jason admits, his voice far from being sympathetic, “you know, for that night where she helped you and sinclair escape…i may have held onto her wrist too tightly,” jason replied, provoking the boy. steve’s eyebrows slightly furrow, the grip on the bottle he was holding, tightening. how could he not have even noticed that night? he’s not too sure who he was more furious at, jason or himself.

“don’t worry pretty boy, she’s handled worse from me,” jason pokes at steve and he knows he’s implying the times you were involved with the blonde boy.

“i haven’t seen her, i don’t know what you’re talking about,” steve continues. not wanting to get mixed up with jason even more. but jason sees right through him.

“you know…she’s beautiful, that one…every guy in hawkins high would love to get even the smallest of taste…how does it feel, harrington?,” he continues to probe, the question leaving steve confused, “what?”

“to be chosen by her,” he stated like it was the most obvious thing in the world “you see, she ended things with me, stating that she was in love with someone else, then after that…i started seeing you with her, kind of just put two and two together y’know, it was so obvious,” steve is left shocked, you told him you weren’t seeing jason anymore because he got with chrissy.

steve makes up his mind, he’s furious at himself. if jason carver was able to piece it together, why couldn’t he? why did it have to take losing you for him to finally realize his feelings?

“oh,” jason chuckles darkly, “don’t tell me?,” he eggs on, “you didn’t know?” he ridicules, mocking the boy. “god, you really are stupid.”

steve feels his patience diminish with every second, he lets go of the bottle, fists getting ready to make an impact. if it wasn’t for robin pulling him away, maybe he would’ve ended up with another black eye. jason watches his retreating figure, scoffing before busying himself once again with the pistol in his hand.

“we don’t have time to fight a little blonde boy, ok,” robin exclaims once they're out of the store, steve groans, annoyed. “focus! steve, jason’s obviously just trying to get you riled up but he’s not important right now…y/n needs us,” he knows that. he doesn’t need to be reminded the fact that you’re still in the upside down and he feels like he’s been wasting so much time.

–

the telephone on your bedside table rings, you answer it, eyes still closed, mind still foggy. “hello?”

deep breathing makes it’s way through the phone, “y/n, where are you?” causing you to sit up, the room around you in color. you sigh, it was all a dream.

the ease that washes over your body only lasts for a second, “i need you!” a blood curdling scream echoes throughout the whole room, painting it blue. a younger version of will byers was standing at the foot of your bed, eyes petrified, the color drained from his face, mirroring the time he was possessed.

“will,” you whisper, afraid to hear your own voice because then that would mean that this wasn’t just a nightmare, that you were now back in your new reality.

“you weren't there!,” the boy roared, in complete rage, “and now everyone’s about to die!... all. because. of. you!” he continues taunting you.

“i’m sorry!,” you heaved, your chest feeling heavy, “i-im so sorry, p-please, please just stop,” you sobbed, closing your eyes and hugging your knees close to your body. you’re not sure how much more of these you can take. you feel so weak. every vision feels like a life source is being taken away from you and all you want to do is succumb.

once vecna has you, all your suffering would be over, the thought is starting to sound tempting.

but the figure of will byers reminded you of something. there must be a portal in the place where it all began, right?

you stare back at the boy, repeatedly telling yourself that it wasn’t really him.

quietly, you reach for the phone sitting beside you and in one quick motion, you cruelly jammed it onto the side of the boy’s head, causing him to fall to his side. his figure morphing into the branches you absolutely hated.

running out of that room as quick as you can, “don’t you think i know what you're doing!,” the husky voice behind you bellows, causing adrenaline to pump through your veins even harder. you run and you run until you no longer feel his eyes on you.

you’re not sure what’s happening, but you’ve noticed some of the branches hissing away, almost like they were hurting, vecna was no longer after you. this was your time to test your theory, you ran all the way to the byers’ house.

stepping in, you were greeted with the same christmas lights hanging on every corner of the ceiling. the alphabet written in black ink is still evident as day. shivers going down your spine. you remember this. you were here, standing at the exact same spot, when it all started.

you look around the living room, spotting steve’s makeshift bat. you carefully grab it, hands gripping it tightly, it was heavier than it looked yet somehow the weapon gives you comfort. you decide to hold on to it.

searching the entire house, you don’t find a portal. however, you do find a tape player in jonathan’s room. quickly scanning around the boys’ drawers, you hope to god everywhere was around here somewhere. music was the only thing that took you away from vecna and you’re going to need more time if you ever want to get out of here and help the others.

the sound of the front door opening halts your movement. swiftly grabbing steve’s bat, you make your way out of the room, ready to come in contact with vecna once again. raising the bat a bit higher, you get ready to swing.

the face of the man you love comes into view and you’re frozen, unable to move. you can’t do this anymore. “no!” you cry, backing away from him, fear evident in your eyes “p-please, please just stop,” the bat in your hands lowering, you close your eyes, not wanting to see his hollow eyes again. not wanting to hear the malicious words vecna has managed to come up with this time.

not wanting to taint steve’s image any longer.

“i give up,” you whisper, your hands unwrapping itself from the bat, dropping it straight to the ground, it’s sound ringing through the air, “you win.”

he felt relieved yet heartbroken at the same time. the fear in your eyes crushes him. you are a beautiful tragedy, small cuts evident on your face, your clothes sporting multiple rips, some of those were colored in red. and your voice - so small. you’re fragile and he’s afraid that you’ll break at any moment yet he walks over to you anyways.

the important thing is you’re alive.

footsteps make their way closer to you. having accepted your fate, you ready yourself for the pain that lies ahead. instead, warm hands make their way upon your cheeks causing you to slowly flutter your eyes open.

steve’s brown eyes.

“i’m here,” he whispers only for you to hear.

you’re not too sure what’s real anymore. your visions always started out like it was.

hands immediately go to his chest, up his shoulders, exploring his body, trying to make sure that this isn’t just another trick. he watches you even though all he wanted was to wrap his arms around you, to let you know that it’s really him. he knows that it will overwhelm you so he waits, giving you all the time in the world.

he feels so warm. “y-you’re really here,” you whisper, finding it hard to find your voice, hesitantly, you look up at him once again, his eyes are still brown and you can’t help but release your tears, hands immediately wrapping around the boy’s neck, pulling him as close to you as possible. you can feel his heart beating in his chest further confirming that it was truly him.

steve pulls you even closer to him, arms around your waist, his own tears falling freely from his face, the two of you relishing the feeling of finally being back in each other’s arms.

he pulls away first, hands cupping your cheeks, trying to wipe away your fallen tears, eyes intently boring into yours, he has so much he wants to say he doesn’t even know where to start. he chooses to settle with three words. three words that made you feel like you were alive again. “i love you,” he professes before his lips we‘re finally on yours. it was a slow kiss, one that held so many emotions and you can’t help but let your tears continue to flow, the salty taste mixing in between your lips. his words replaying in your head, taking away all feelings of agitation in a way fleetwood mac never could.

maybe if it wasn’t for the gravity of the situation, you would’ve awed at how sentimental this moment is, taking place exactly where you first met him, hell, even on the exact day. but you couldn’t think of anything else, for once, your mind felt at peace. the pounding in your head is only a distant memory, one that you’ll happily get rid of.

pulling away, steve wipes away your tears, you do the same for him, the both of you chuckling at your actions, finding the situation you’re in hard to believe, “i love you… so much,” he continues, placing a soft kiss on your forehead, “i’m sorry it took me so long to finally tell you,” his eyes quickly flashing with regret, forehead softly colliding with yours as he listened to the sound of your breathing. his hands under your shirt, just wanting to feel your skin. “h-how did you get here?” you ask, finally finding your voice.

“molotov cocktail,” he shrugs like it was the most normal thing in the world. you piece it all together, the branches hissing, vecna leaving you alone, all because the boy in front of you threw a bomb at a portal.

“that was very smart of you,” you point out, steve’s quiet laugh sounds so melodic, “how did you know i was here?”

“intuition, i guess, something in my gut just brought me here,” he explains.

vecnas was wrong. guilt isn’t the strongest of all.

love is.

it’s always been love.

you take him all in before leaning towards him once again, capturing his lips into a greedy kiss. he kisses you back with the same amount of force. you’ve missed him so much. you never want this moment to end. besides being in the upside down, with vecna being able to walk in at any given moment, you felt absolute bliss.

the sound of a guitar from a distance causes you to pull away. hands quickly gripping the boy's arm. this cannot be another vision or you’re not too sure what you would do with yourself if you find that you were making out with vecna.

steve’s cheeky smile comes into light, his eyes still holding that warm brown, holding so much love for you, “it’s eddie,” he states and you look up at him, confused, “what?”

“c’mon, we have to go,” he grabs your hand, pulling you out of the byers‘ house and running away from the commotion. he explains to you the plan that was being set in motion — eddie and dustin distracting the bats; max and the sinclairs distracting vecna; robin and nancy heading to victor creels house.

he continues, letting you know about nancy’s visions and how she saw vecna feeding off of your guilt. you swear you want nothing more than to burn this bastard to the ground, steve’s makeshift bat in your hand.

the two of you maze through the neighborhood, trying to avoid every branch to get to nancy and robin. steve’s hand never leaves yours, the bats above you flying towards the direction of eddie’s trailer, master of puppets still ringing through your ears.

finally making your way into the house, you notice robin and nancy on the front porch, waiting. robin immediately envelops you into a hug, a sigh of relief falling from her lips “oh my god, you look like shit,” she says bluntly, earning a chuckle from you.

“thanks, that’s really what i need to hear right now,” you reply sarcastically. your eyes dart over to nancy who has a small smile playing on her lips. mirroring her expression. you mutter out a soft, “thank you,” and she gives you a knowing nod.

“we’ll, let’s kill this son of a bitch so we can get out of here,” steve breaks off the small reunion.

“sounds good, this place gives me the creeps,” robin comments before the four of you opened the door and were met with numerous vines coming out of the floors, oozing unto the walls, it was everywhere.

steve carefully starts making his way into the house, not letting fear get the best of him. he gets to the bottom of the stairs, sending the three of you a smile, “oooh, what? does he want us to clap?” robin playfully whispers for only you and nancy to hear and you can't help but share playful grins.

you retrace steve’s steps, nancy muttering out a, “be careful.”

soon after, the two followed. in a matter of minutes, the four of you have made your way to the top of stairs, all determined to get this over with.

the ground rumbling from beneath ruins the plans, your head immediately pounding, you wince, steves hand’s quick on your shoulder, stabling you. his eyes held nothing but concern and you shoot him a small smile, letting him know that you’re okay.

the small, intimate moment interrupted by robin’s cries, “steve!” she yells out to her best friend, the vines grabbing her and wrapping her into the wall. steve was in action as soon as his name slipped past the girl’s lips, his axe quickly swinging in motion, viciously hitting the vines who were wrapping tighter and tighter.

the vines were fighting back just as hard, eventually capturing steve and nancy, pulling them to the other side of the wall, somehow leaving you, unharmed, desperately trying to free your friends using only the bat in your hand. it doesn't work, the vines seeming to get tighter with every second. you look into your friends eyes, robin, nancy, then steve’s. you just want them out of here.

“stop!” you yell out into the air.

“let them go!,” you cry out, the three watching you, struggling to breathe as they try to pull away the vines that were tightening around their necks.

“you want to win, don’t you?!,” you continue, you know vecna can hear you. you can feel him watching your every move.

“then do it!, take your last kill!,” you tempt him.

“y/n, no,” steve was able to mutter, catching your attention, you don’t look at him. you’re not sure you’ll be able to handle it.

“kill me!,” your voice, hoarse, tears once leaving your eyes. the vines around your friends slowly unravel, causing them all to fall to the ground, gasps and coughs slipping past their lips. all of vecna’s energy rushing towards you as you were transported into another memory.

steve was quick to run to you, blank, white eyes making contact with his, “no, no, no,” he says hurriedly, “hey, hey, come back to me,” he whispers. it’s not okay. the amount of time he’s gone through this. he just got you back and now you’ve drifted off once again and this time, he’s not sure if you will ever come back.

“his body is still up there,” nancy reminds everyone, giving the boy the slightest of hope.

“c’mon nance, lets do this,” robin quickly adds. she’s well aware they wouldn’t be able to drag steve up there with them. he’ll never leave your side, it wasn’t even a question.

nancy nods, “we’ll be quick,” she says, trying to reassure the boy.

–

you find yourself in another memory, this one, not yours. eyes scanning the room, you recognize it as the gym, decorated in what seemed to be the snowball decorations and then you spot a familiar figure.

“max!,” you call out to her, she quickly looks back, scared.

“it’s me… i promise, it’s me,” you say gently, making your way over to her.

“no,” she shakes her head, looking at the ground. your hand making contact with her shoulder provides her some comfort and in a second she has her hands wrapped around you, crying into your shoulders. you held her just as tightly,

“are you ready to watch me kill her, y/n?” vecna’s voice breaks the two of you out of your embrace as you step in front of max, trying your best to shield her from him. it doesn’t work. he’s so strong.

vecna flungs you against the wall, your head making hard contact. “y/n!” max cries out, running after you. you try to shake away the feeling of unconsciousness, quickly getting back to your feet, both of you running towards the exit.

you were in another place now – one that max has drifted to before. you see chrissy’s distorted figure wrapped around the tree, the sight alone making you want to empty your guts. you continue to run, max’s hand in yours. vecna following.

vines clung their way around max’s ankle, pulling her back and dragging her across the floor and you can’t help but let out a battle cry, grabbing the first rock you see, you run as fast as your feet can carry you, smashing it upon the vine, freeing max. the girl continued to run in the opposite direction.

vecna just stands there, watching you both. you’re so tired of his bullshit. you’re so tired of running. and so you stop. turning around, you walk towards him. max halts her steps, “y/n, what are you doing?” she half shouts.

max is so afraid, her mind not allowing her feet to follow you. you don't want her to. at this point it was either you or her. and you don’t think you’d be able to live with yourself if anything were to happen to the red headed girl.

the rock still tightly clutched around your fingers, you make your way towards the figure that has been tormenting you, gaining confidence in every step.

now in front of him, you face him, no signs of fear nor guilt entering your body. you have truly given up, accepting your fate. you had one last fight in you, ready to smash the rock upon his face but he’s much faster. vecna’s fingers make their way upon your head, the rock flying god knows where, all you could see is the red sky between the space of his fingers.

“it’s time,” his sinister voice makes it’s way to your ears. max is frozen, unable to move as vecna starts to suck out the life that remains in you.

you can hear steve’s cries from the other side, you can feel him grasp onto your hand, desperately trying to keep you grounded.

“do not leave me!” he commands, voice laced in nothing but heartbreak and desperation. he calls out to robin and nancy, not knowing what to do any longer. your body was getting so high, taking his breath with you. he’s struggling to form coherent sentences, the girl he loves seconds a way from her death and all he could do was stand there and watch.

the sound of your arm cracking mortifies the boy below you, “please!, p-please, stop! i love you, you have to come back,” he’s muffled pleas surrounding you, a tear escaping your eye as vecna continues to take you away.

and then you hear a yell, vecna being flung away from you – eleven.

your body makes hard contact with the ground, the skies above you still red, no signs of steve anywhere. max makes her way towards you, you can’t move. one of vecna’s vines impaling you, blood slowly sputtering out your lips, “y’n… y/n stay with me,” max pleads, her blue eyes coming into view, hands supporting your head.

you’re struggling to breathe, your own blood suffocating you.

everything feels a bit hazy and then you see him, brown eyes, filled with tears as he holds you close to his chest, hands in the same place that max’s were.

you felt like you were going back and forth in between the worlds.

“hey, hey,” he whispers, “you’re okay,” he tries to console you. trying to convince himself in the process. blood continues to spill from your lips and he notices the gash that appeared on your stomach, painting your shirt a deep red.

“s-steve,” you croak out, your hand from your unbroken arm, gently making it’s way to his cheeks. he holds onto your fingers, keeping you there.

you feel so cold.

“don’t talk, okay, it’s okay, we’re gonna get you out of here,” he hushly whispers, staring into your eyes that were beginning to droop so low, “just keep your eyes open for me,” he begs.

your thumb softly grazes upon his chapped lips, the faint tune of everywhere encompasses you, you’re sure you’re imagining it. a series of happy memories makes its way into your mind. i guess its true, what they say, about your best memories flashing before you meres before your death.

you envision steve that halloween night, beer bottle in hand, laughing over a joke you said. all the days spent with him and the kids just goofing off at starcourt mall, giggling at his sailor outfit. every drive where you were sitting on the passenger seat, the pretty boy next to you up to the moments in steve’s room where it was just the two of you, enjoying each other’s presence. even moments from this whole chaos makes their way – robin, nancy, eddie, all of it playing out like a movie.

feelings of comfort, happiness, love rushes in at once and you know it's time to go.

“i-i love you…steve, s-steve harrington,” you managed to whisper out between your very red lips, only for him to hear. your thumb gently wiping away his tears, before completely slipping off, hands going limp, eyes shutting.

steve can’t help but let out whimpers of cries.

max, on the other side, mirroring him.

four

an: oops? vol 2 absolutely destroyed me and i refused to accept the fact that max and eddie are rip so i killed you instead ... or did i? hehe ... one more chapter left??

taglist:

@preciousbabypeter

@dabria14

@earthkissedcalum

@lettyshush

@m1ke-wheeler

@fujiihime

@zeusmyster

@buckys-bbarnes

@rexorangecouny

(ok i have no idea if i tagged you guys correctly, hoping this works. thank you for reading!)

#steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington x you #stranger things season four #stranger things x you #stranger things x reader #stranger things x y/n #steve harrington angst #stranger things #love.c.#everywhere we were there #i’ll follow you everywhere #everywhere

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itwoodbeprefect · 9 months

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Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 🤍

thank you!! ❤ sooo @actingcamplibrarian also sent me this one, and i'm going to take this opportunity to cheat (shamelessly!) and just. give another five fics. because there are more than ten of them on ao3, and because i can.

so again (mhuahaha), from five different fandoms, in no particular order:

Silly wrong but vivid right [sga, john/rodney]

i adore this now, but i went through a weird thing while writing it where i really loved the first half, and then i had to end it somehow and i came up with something that i didn't like very much, and i ended up posting it anyway because i still liked the first half a lot and felt it deserved to see the light of day. which is interesting to me because when i reread it now it doesn't feel wildly out of balance at all, and it all fits just fine, and i just still really really like the idea of 1) gay john getting some freedom and actually taking it, 2) rodney on the sidelines having Weird Feelings about it and drawing a very wrong conclusion, and 3) both of them still being idiots, at the end of the day.

Tell me the sky is falling now [starsky/hutch]

i like the way i opened this! and the way it ended too, and nearly all of what's in the middle. most of all though i like starsky Finding Out and being confused and maybe trying to freak out but hutch is right there, and he loves hutch, and he doesn't want to freak hutch out, and then he comes to some other conclusions, because it's hutch, and he's starsky, and that's the important part. this is one of those fics that i keep sort of almost rewriting in the sense that i have very similar ideas for a story and then have to try to figure out how to bend that new idea into a shape that's at least slightly unique so i don't actually end up writing a pale imitation of this one.

Cause if we’re all gonna die (Now’s the time to be alive) [h50, steve/danny]

in terms of my h50 fic this is definitely on the older side, but i still firmly stand by the headcanon behind this, i like that it has a good dosis of team banter, and it has some lines that i think of fondly from time to time, like this: He tumbles until he’s kissing Danny, awkwardly boxing Danny and his soft heat in against the cold and rough wall, not quite sure yet if this big bang is a creation myth or a mass extinction event. and, of course, taking the sappiness a step further still: Everything that comes after this point in time will forever be witnessed by eyes that have to send images off to be processed in a brain that also stores the memory of this kiss, which logically and inescapably prevents anything from ever being experienced the same as before.

Coming Up Aces [911, eddie/buck]

i don't know if i'd call this one a favorite writing-wise (at least overall - there are definitely parts that i do really like), but it does rank on a list of favorite fics i've written in the sense that, just. the way people connect with fic like this means something to me. and one of the things it means is that there should be more ace rep in (mainstream) media so people don't have to have these huge epiphany-like moments only while reading fic, but another is just feelings, big and warm and human.

Abandon your sad history (and meet me in the fire) [top gun, iceman/maverick]

top gun is A Movie, for sure, and i'd been trying to write some fic for it for a while when this finally came together. i loved playing with identities here, and the extended metaphors pretty much wrote themselves (iceman!), and every time i reread it and come to the line that mentions iceman is drinking an old fashioned while trying to fend off maverick's very queer advances i give myself a little pat on the back for subtle jokes.

#my fic #i was going to give the mr. blandings fic as the last one but then i came across the top gun one and that edged it out #but mr. blandings is here too in my heart. you ask me for five fics and i give you eleven #*#tag stuff #h50 #starsky and hutch #top gun #911 #sga

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what-do-1000-swords-look-like · 1 year

Text

So while watching the episode last night, I noticed that the talk between Buck and Eddie gave off a very partner vibe, something similar to Maddie and Chimney or Bobby and Athena for example.

I knew it was in the details such as the lighting, the set up, the dialogue, the framing, and the overall feel of the scene but I also just noticed this little parallel:

youtube

Eddie is making a sandwich when Buck walks in and gets Buck water to drink. Then they have their talk.

Chim is making tea while talking to Maddie about Buck and pours her a cup.

youtube

And then we have the contrasting vibe of the two scenes (despite Maddie and Eddie being paralleled consistently throughout the last couple of seasons) of Buck opening up and talking:

youtube

And yet the parallels are still there:

Maddie: "And I didn't want to ask for help because I didn't want to be a burden. But then I just kept drifting farther away until..."

Buck: "Until you were gone."

In this very same episode both Maddie and Eddie are now in a position to help Buck go through his own ordeal, the difference is Eddie is not pushing & he's going at Buck's chosen pace while Maddie is pushing (that's not a criticism, she's the big sister & he did technically die so I get it, she wants him to be okay) which brings me back to:

5x04 -

Buck: "He just doesn't know her the way I do."

Eddie: "Or you don't know her the way he does. When you think of your sister, you see this person you've always looked up to, the woman who's taken care of you, but maybe that's not who she is right now. This time, maybe she's the one who needs taking care of." (him attempting to reassure Buck while also explaining where Chim was coming from)

6x12 -

Maddie: "He was suspicious of the pot roast but he figured it out by Sudoku."

Chim: "As much as I like making fun of your brother, he's not an actual idiot. Which is good news because I know you're worried about him doing too much too fast, but I think he's taking his recovery seriously." (him attempting to reassure Maddie and pull her back a bit)

Which very much plays into Buck and Eddie's scene in 6x12 in the kitchen, and then the dialogue of that scene comes back into play in Buck and Maddie's later scene:

Eddie: "Every day you open your eyes in the morning, you feel a little less surprised the world's still there."

Buck: "When I wake up, and I mean like every single time, I have this checklist now, run in my head. A way to test that I'm really here."

Maddie: "What do you check?"

Buck: "First, time of day. It's never night in my coma dream. Then I text Bobby..."

And while Buck is opening up to Maddie about this and didn't give Eddie this detail, there is also another contrast they gave us between the two scenes.

When talking to Maddie, Buck is very much Buck. Even when telling her about his checklist. He's not completely vulnerable.

But when talking to Eddie, when he asks if he can ask if Buck is okay, we see a truly vulnerable Buck:

Oliver plays this scene in this way with the dialogue of "Honestly, Eddie...I don't know."

And the vulnerability continues as Eddie talks to him:

We didn't see vulnerable Buck with Maddie (in their earlier scene as well), Josh, or Connor. And while that makes sense for the last two, it doesn't with Maddie. We saw a little bit with Hen, but here his vulnerability is on full display.

They really went all out this episode to not only connect Eddie's and Buck's stories together even further, but also I think to start showing us (and the GA) how these two are going to become the 4th main pairing of the show.

There was no other reason for that Eddie and Buck scene to happen the way it did. The fact that it happens in the kitchen with dimmed lighting should tells us everything we need to know.

Especially since:

And even:

#buddie #buck x eddie #evan x eddie #buddieposts #buddie meta #metaposts #911 #911posts #eddie and maddie parallels #madney and buddie parallels #buddie parallels #911 parallels

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sunshinereddie · 1 year

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a continuation of the last ask and your response: but what if it does become a point of contention between richie and eddie because richie is (rightfully) traumatized and concerned about leaving eddie alone and wanting to make sure he’s recovering but eddie is so tired of being smothered and even though it’s so different from his mother or myra he can’t help but feel the similarities and they have to come to a conclusion that they both have stuff they need to work on. i just love dysfunctional post-canon reddie where yes they’re in love with each other but they also underestimate how difficult it’s going to be to actually be together

ohhhhh yesss!!!! as much as i love writing cute and fluffy post-ch2 reddie, i think it’s also so so important to remember that their relationship probably wouldn’t be perfect right away. it would honestly probably be far from perfect. they haven’t seen each other in 27 years, and they have both gone through their own traumas in those years, and it will definitely take them both some time to work through their own and each other’s!

like im imagining the tension has been building up between the two of them for a while, and eventually one day eddie kind of snaps and compares richie to his mother or myra in a moment of frustration. this of course would hit both of them pretty hard, because richie KNOWS everything that sonia and myra have done to eddie, and the last thing he wants to be is just another iteration of control and possessiveness over eddie, and he’s hurt that he has made eddie feel that way. but he knows that this is a sensitive area for eddie, and he feels guilty about it, but he just can’t help but worry whenever he thinks about all the times eddie just narrowly missed death.

and eddie doesn’t really know what to feel, because he KNOWS that richie is just trying to care for him, but even though it is richie that doesn’t change how eddie feels about being fussed over about his health. he obviously doesn’t want to compare richie to his ex-wife, or even worse his mother, but he can’t help it. being smothered, no matter by who, has that same effect on him. he is traumatized, and that doesn’t magically go away. he loves richie, and he can appreciate that richie wants to make sure he’s okay, but eddie needs him to know that he’s not quite ready for that yet.

AAAHHH THANK YOU FOR THIS IDEA it’s giving me lots to think about hehe

#sunshinereddie asks

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dapper-nahrwhale · 2 years

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ive been thinking abt It and dndads (and stranger things kinda) for hours now its like. the monster has always been here and has shaped your life in ways you cant even perceive and you want to outgrow it but you cant and you never will. and the monster is a living breathing creature but it's also your parents and grandparents and it's also You and youre just continuing to act it out. nick leaves taylor like glenn (kind of) left him like bill left him and so on. eddie and bev marry people just like their parents. lark and sparrow literally have the doodler in their bloodstreams. augh

LITERALLY. it refuses to leave my head. The paralleling in these stories ahhg! Dndads and it (two of my favorite things in the world) hit the same thing!

Gawd just. Everything about these makes me go insane. The way the cycle repeats. You cant stop the monster that ruined your childhood from ruining your adulthood too. You are that monster. You cant move on past what happened when you were a kid. You the exact same kid you were when it happened except you're nothing like that kid at all. You can never change from the shit you went through and you'll never be that kid again. You became your parents without even realizing it.

Its about the generational trauma!

Also. Grant parallels Darryl by talking about things too much instead of too little. When he said the "we'll talk about it later" in the recent ep I lost it. The fact that they were all so irreversibly changed by that happened to them as kids that they cant change back to who they once were. He is not the boy you knew. I'm never over how they dealt with the consequences of episode 1 by grant becoming a fundamentally different and unrecognizable person to avoid that curse thing. Like that fucked up his whole shit forever man.

Lark and Sparrow are SO like henry whether they realize it or not. The Lark and bill denbrough parallels <3. They both feel insurmountable crushing guilt over something they think was entirely their fault. They were just kids. They make amends for this in the worst way possible. By trying (and failing) to kill the creature they're guilty for (insert obligatory fma03 ed and sloth reference). They let their guilt consume them. If they cant kill the horror they made whays the point of them living though it

I'm not assigning rigid roles to each character, just noticing the parallels. But I'd say the potential for sparrow and stan to be similar is so interesting. They both try as hard as they can to lead a normal regular life in spite of everything that's happened and yet they fail on that.

I realized immediately ep 1 that nick was like glenn and bill and ect ect with the not being there. But not by choice! But the cycle continues none the less! (I dont know if we'll be able to find nick and have him be reunited with the others in s2 or not. I think they all need to be there and alive to defeat the doodler, to end the eldritch horror that took their world. But if hes not there how do they kill it?)

The concept of nick needing an inhaler but never using it because he doesnt want to be lame in front of his dad vs eddie not needing one but continuing to use it because his mom says he needs it! (Smth smth the unconscious and conscious power their parents have on them smth smth)

Terry holding everyone together like mike is so chefs kiss yes! Terry and (maybe) ben being the most well adjusted of the groups. And well adjusted is very loosely said here because are any of them really? Terry being the researcher and the one to find the spells and the one to try so hard to save everyone he can (like mike).

Instead of just them forgetting the events like in it, they remember it all but the rest of the world forgot. How fucking lonley that must be either way.

Off topic but. One thing about it I adore is the 90s tv miniseries, where out takes place in the 60s in flashbacks and 80s/90s in present time and then in the new movies it take splace in the 80s and the present is the present! The exact 27 year gap between them is insane when you see the production for it had been in production hell since the 2000s!

I'm going to be thinking about these stories for the rest of my life I think...

Feeling the shrimp emotions about this rn.

#dndads #it (2017)#it (movie)#dndads s2 #b.text #i could go on abt this forever. so many thoughts. so little time.#just!!! i lose it about this! aaaaaaaa #today has already been such a Day. to this is giving me so much joy <3

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bettycanavosio · 2 years

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you know i feel like vito and henry are both kinda getting tired of The Life but in different ways, like...vito's clearly been having thoughts of quitting for a long time but he doesn't feel like he has any other options so he just soldiers on. henry on the other hand will never be anything but a gangster and he knows it, but the whole "next thirty years breaking your ass" speech (especially given he mentions eddie–i think he's picturing luca) gives me the vibe that he's tired of being pushed around by other people and coming to the realization that twenty years of taking shit from clemente wasn't worth it. i think in leo's kitchen especially (i know that's an optional scene oops) with both "those aren't the people who pay me" (showing he no longer cares about the rules) and the fact he ends up sparing leo for vito's sake, he starts realizing what his actual priorities are and that he really doesn't give a shit about anything but himself and his two friends. so his solution is to start trying to make his own money, and when vito's dissatisfaction becomes obvious, henry thinks roping him into his plan will somehow make things better quite possibly because he doesn't realize why vito's tired of the life or thinks he'll get over it once he's got some cash in his pocket–like he misinterprets it as "all this hard work hasn't paid off how i expected" and not "i don't like who this lifestyle has turned me into/the cost hasn't been worth the material success" (especially given he expresses those doubts before the house fire or frankie cutting him off, and right after marty comes up...) god this is so long i'm sorry

never apologise i’d literally read a whole novel if you sent one. however i think i somehow managed to write a fuck ton about nothing in response oops

anyway i love this you’re so right. i do think the complete miscommunication between each other’s wants and perceptions of The Life is what ruins them and their friendship. i feel like henry has been forced so hard to have this mentality that money will solve everything that when he gradually breaks out of it, it’s so similar to trying to gasp for air not knowing you were ever underwater. he’s in this weird grey area between i want money and i want my friends whereas vito is in an area between i want my friends and i want to recognise myself again.

the terrible thing is that, whilst they have one desire in common, it’s the other desire that gnaws on the string that binds them. vito eventually just doesn’t seem to think anything can compensate for the loss of his family (both to death and estrangement), and so his friends become his strongest attachments. he thinks he can find himself in them. unfortunately, these same friends present the extrinsic want for money (e.g. c’mon, don’t be stupid, vito. twenty fucking grand in one afternoon) so he forces himself to think if it works so well for them it must work for me, but it doesn’t and he knows that, but he can’t be all let’s give up and do our own thing because that doesn’t feel like an option for him. it’s just easier to endure the life now. not to mention the selfish nature of leaving completely opposes vito’s altruism.

of course henry doesn’t give a fuck about being selfish (and after all those years, i don’t blame him). the only problem is that, like before, he blurs the lines between the things that actually make him happy. vito’s wants (friendship and self-discovery (?) for lack of a better term) are tied into each other, but money and friendship are things that are hard to bind. yet it’s the only thing henry knows. i honestly think henry could hand vito bags and bags of cash and he just wouldn’t understand why vito is still unsatisfied. henry’s very much i realised all i’ve ever wanted is my money and my friends, why isn’t this enough for you? why don’t our ends meet? while vito is like i don’t want your money. you don’t want your money. be honest.

but they don’t even get the time to have that full conversation after all the fragments we get that build to it, and henry doesn’t get the time to grow away from what holds him underwater because he fucking dies. just so much unfinished business.

anyway tl;dr have this quote about sisyphus

#i don’t know if this makes sense #also i’m sorry this took ages to write #a*#harry

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mi4016tomberry · 1 year

Text

Ouseburn Project 2

I decided that this time I wanted to keep my project simple and avoid biting off more than I can chew as I did in my last project. I wanted to focus on just one or two skills I could really develop like learning to Animate speech.

After realising I wasn't limited to the 20th century for my project, I began delving deeper into Ouseburn as a place to try and find a subject of focus for my documentary. I browsed through website after website finally much the same on each page and so far nothing had grabbed my attention. Not until I started looking on YouTube and found this video:

youtube

It wasn't the information in the video that got me, it was the guy himself. He came across as a bit of a character and someone I could base my documentary on; his awkward deadpan delivery and how close he stood to the camera just seemed like something I could caricature and use as the foundation of the documentary. His appearance, bald head and oddly pointy ears, initially led me down the road of turning him into a goblin or some kind of character inspired by the folklore I was researching previously.

I had a play around with some different ideas from everything I'd collected so far and played around different directions for the documentary. Primarily they focused on his approach to video making and making his features more cartoon and exaggerated.

I sketched him out so I could get a feel for the sort of look I was heading towards with the documentary and started to plan out some different scenarios for him to document in Ouseburn.

I wanted pick an area of Ouseburn that I use as the topic of my documentary. When coming up with ideas I always wanted to stray away from the truth and instead create a fictitious documentary inspired by and set in Ouseburn. I initially liked the idea of Eddie (the man from the Tyneside Life YouTube Channel) doing a similar educational video based on Ouseburn but have him record it on a boat as he flows through Ouseburn, eventually getting stuck in the boat and, unable to swim, he floats down the Ouseburn until he finds himself stranded on the Tyne.

I did a couple more sketches focused around Eddie to get used to his face shape so I understood which features stood out and could distort. I also had a very quick look into the different mouth shapes for lip syncing to build up a general idea of the kinds of shapes I would be using in the animation process.

I went back and forth on a few ideas with Eddie and decided to dip my toes back into some research of the area. Because I'd look through so much garbage related to Ouseburn, YouTube started recommending me videos about the place and the general area. I browsed through a few more videos until I came across something distinctly different from Eddie's content and I was introduced to Alan Robson and his ghost hunting escapades in this video:

I'd found another character to base my project on. It was yet another older geordie gentlemen, this time with a proclivity for spooky tales and ghost hunting. But Alan just stood out more, there was more of a personality there and better yet, Alan gave me a topic for my documentary. I'd skipped through a lot of the video to skim through and find something juicy to use and I was pleasantly surprised when I reached around the 50:20 mark. This man has spent 50 minutes walking around Newcastle at night in the pouring rain, filming every single alley he passes and seeming have a story about each and every one. To sprinkle a little more ridiculousness into the video (other than his cowboy hat) the man pulls out what I learnt to be an EVP (electronic voice phenomenon) device. In theory they generate white noise which the ghosts can interact with and voices can be heard during the white noise. Now that I've explained what these devices supposedly do, I can move onto Alan's EVP device. It essentially sounded like a compilation of random sounds and noises he'd stuck together on a loop himself and was then wandering around at night acting like this wasn't the stupidest thing he's ever done. I just thought the acting and the general silliness of the whole thing was really entertaining, I'm pretty sure it's all made for kids on Night Owls UK and if its not that even better. It just seemed like a hidden gem that would be a perfect premise for my documentary - Alan ghost hunting around Ouseburn.

#Youtube

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wackybuddiemewbs · 3 years

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Buddie Moodboard - 27 Dresses AU

Because one wedding planner!Buck moodboard is not enough (it totally was 1 too many already, but... I have 0 impulse control). Anyway. 27 dresses become 27 suits (okay, there should be one dress in this, but you know what I mean). And I show zero respect for canon-compliance. How else would it be???

Evan "Buck" Buckley is what you could call a wedding enthusiast. Luckily, he happens to have a lot of friends and acquaintances who want to seal the deal. Thus, he's happy to help wherever he's needed. Even more so when his colleague Chimney announces that Buck's sister Maddie said yes when he asked her to marry him.

Though truth be told, he is a bit worried about Maddie's and Chimney's wedding. Because Maddie refuses to talk to Chimney about the issues she is facing with a divorce she has to get through before she can finally be with the man she loves. And Buck feels like he owes Maddie to let her do things her way while supporting her the best he can while also feeling like Chimney should know the truth. Because Buck knows Chim would want to be there for her, simple as that.

Be it as it may, weddings ought to be happy occasions. So he tries to focus on that. He literally runs into a writer named Eddie at one of the two weddings he attended this Saturday, after he got knocked out by a woman way too eager to catch the flower bouquet. Thankfully, Eddie is both an ex-Army medic and charming. So he helps Buck get back home and shares the Uber with him while Buck tries to clear his head again.

What Buck doesn't know is that Eddie is his favorite writer for the L.A. Journal, author of the best Commitment pieces Buck ever read. Eddie, for his part, is perfectly intrigued with the guy he saw jumping between two weddings in a single night. He convinces his editor to let him run a story on Buck, more so after he found Buck's phone still unlocked in the car and now knows that those were already his sixth and seventh wedding this year.

Luckily for Eddie, Buck's mom hired him to run a story on Chimney and Maddie, which provides him with the perfect cover to dig deeper into this most curious case insisting on being called Buck.

Buck is shocked when he a) receives a call from his own phone, b) it turns out to be the charming guy he met at the wedding, and c) that same guy is E. Diaz. To say that he is a bit nervous may be an understatement, but Buck will do whatever it takes to get Maddie and Chimney the perfect wedding, even more so if that means Maddie gets the time and space to finally have that overdue conversation with her fiancé.

Sadly for Buck, Eddie turns out to be nothing like he imagined E. Diaz to be like. Eddie loathes weddings and everything it stands for, for what it seems. And still, he writes about those weddings as though he believed in eternal love and the magic of the moment when the bride walks down the aisle.

The two are off to a rocky start, especially since they continue to clash on the matter of the true meaning of marriage. Buck accidentally discovers that Eddie has a son - after he gave the guy a lift to the hospital where his grandmother was taken after she fell down while babysitting. Just like he learns that Eddie used to be married, but Shannon filed for a divorce and took off.

Strange, how different yet similar they seem to be. Buck himself had his girlfriend walk out on him, too. Just that Abby simply ghosted him and they weren't actually married. Yet. Because Buck would have hoped for it that he'd be the one for Abby. But that wasn't the case.

To make up for it, Buck "hooks up" Eddie with Carla, to help him figure out how to navigate the healthcare system to get his son the care he needs. And to open up the possibility for Eddie to consider something else, as he is feeling miserable as a writer in the Commitments section. He'd rather do something more purposeful, simple as that.

Eddie, for his part, finds himself increasingly conflicted. He asked his editor to let him run this story on Buck, but there is so much more to the guy than a great story to please the readers. Buck is a kind and generous person who instantly took Christopher into his heart. He is someone who shows up, someone who is committed.

He is forced into some more realizations when Buck takes him along on a call as a bystander, only for them to learn that Abby's fiancé is in dire danger. When Buck wants to head out for an almost suicidal mission without telling his captain about it, Eddie steps in and speaks up. Buck can be pissed at him all he wants. He just doesn't want him to throw his life away for the woman who dumped him out of a false sense of obligation.

Buck isn't wavered, though. He goes through with the rescue. And while he manages to pull it off and bring Abby's fiancé and himself to safety, Eddie is deeply shaken by how close he came to losing someone important to him all over again. Buck is taken aback being told as much. He doesn't really have the expectation for anyone aside from Maddie and the 118.

Things are a bit tense thereafter. Coupled with a bit of bad luck, the two wind up in a minor car accident, leaving them stranded in the middle of nowhere for the night. They have a blast at a local bar, and letting all walls fall, dare to fall into each other's arms.

Sadly, the romantic bliss is short-lived when Buck gets to charge his phone and has to read online that he is apparently the headline of the latest issue. Eddie is petrified. He told his colleague Taylor to pass on the message to hold the story for another week, but the story was published anyway, before Eddie could make some overdue changes.

Buck storms off angrily, believing himself a fool for having trusted anyone but his family. He should have known better than to fall for that again. He is happy for the distraction of the wedding preparations, as this gives him good reason not to take any of Eddie's calls. He is busy making at least two people he cares about happy, after all.

Eddie is frantic to explain to Buck what happened, as there was a misunderstanding between him and Taylor that led to her handing the story over in his absence. Even more so because Christopher misses Buck terribly and keeps asking when they are going to see each other again. Because just like that, it seems like Eddie failed yet again when it mattered.

If all of that wasn't bad enough already, Buck discovers a dark family secret while going through the photographs for the slide show his mother asked him to prepare for the wedding reception. Feeling hurt and betrayed, he makes some slight changes to it to finally get some truths out of his parents, only for them to drop truths about Maddie's divorce right in front of Chimney.

And just like that, Buck's entire life lies in ruins, which makes him think that maybe he really has no purpose outside his job...

Find more moodboards here.

#buddie #buck x eddie #eddie x buck #evan buckley #eddie diaz #evan buckley x eddie diaz #eddie diaz x evan buck buckley #evan buck buckley #buddie moodboard #buddie au #buddie aesthetic #moodboard #aesthetic #fanfic in smol #I HAVE A MIGHTY NEED FOR WEDDING PLANNER! BUCK #SO GOD HELP ME

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bandsanitizer · 3 years

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Okay but that scene in the hospital as letting Buck know what he means to Eddie and Christopher, not just as Eddie’s coworker or firefighting partner. Not just as someone who cares about Christopher. Not just another person there to help make being a single parent easier for Eddie. No, that scene was Eddie informing Buck that he is family—for real. That he’s Eddie’s best friend and the person he trusts the most. That he’s both a good friend to Christopher, but a remarkable guardian in his life, too. And this is so important in timing. (Explained after the “Keep Reading” because it’s a long post.)

Disclaimer: I recognize that everyone has different experiences, views, and definitions, regarding family, parenting, and the interpretation of canon. This is mine and yours are yours. This isn’t heavily romantic-Buddie inclined, nor is it intended to be, but it can be read as such. Also, spoilers for up to the s4 finale.

At the beginning of season 3, we learn what Christopher means to Buck. In his fight to save and find Christopher—risking his life—Buck showcases that he loves Christopher, that Christopher is important to him, and, in how he doesn’t have the “Oh, shit! How do I tell Eddie?” moment until he sees Eddie, it solidifies that Buck’s care for Christopher is not lenient on Christopher being Eddie’s son.

Later in s3, in the market, we see how Eddie views Buck regarding Christopher. By bringing up Christopher in the argument (“Christopher misses you.”), Eddie acknowledges a level of responsibility Buck has regarding Christopher. Granted, Buck loves kids and he’s a softie so that comment would hurt either way, BUT Eddie is not the kind of person to just use Christopher for the sake of a guilt trip. Eddie knows Buck cares about Christopher, Eddie knows Buck probably didn’t think things through, and Eddie wishes that Buck did. As much as that stands, however, it’s made clear that Eddie expected Buck to consider how it might affect them and Christopher. A big responsibility to place on a typical friend.

Yet, since this is coming right off the tsunami incident, Eddie’s expectations aren’t unexpected, but an extension. He said that there was “nobody else in the world,” that he would trust with Christopher more than Buck. And then for Buck to cut everyone off? Like it wouldn’t even matter? That doesn’t fit the way Eddie views how Buck cares—particularly, how he cares about Christopher.

Then jump to Eddie Begins. This is where we clearly see how Buck views Eddie and further confirmation that Christopher is in fact Eddie’s everything.

Buck’s reaction to the well collapsing on Eddie is very similar to his reaction to losing Christopher in the s3 tsunami arc. Distinctly different levels of reaction than he had towards Bobby being in danger and Maddie being held hostage with the rest of the dispatchers. Something Buck mentions to Sue about the latter, is that Maddie has Chimney. Bobby also has Athena. Hen has Karen. Eddie has... Well, Eddie has Buck and Buck has Eddie. The show has been pairing off characters and naturally, Buck and Eddie are one.

So his reaction to losing Eddie being similar to his reaction to losing Christopher, is a way of non-verbally conveying that Buck cares about Eddie a lot. To the same degree or within the same intensity as he cares for and loves Christopher. That it’s not just what they mean to other people in Buck’s life, but what they mean to Buck, himself. And with the contrast for worrying about Maddie or Bobby, it’s a recognition by Buck that in the same way Eddie and Christopher have a place in his life very different from the rest of the firefam, so does Buck in their lives. That he knew Maddie needed Chimney in that moment, and in losing Christopher and Eddie that he was that person in their lives. The one that’s supposed to fight with everything they got to make sure they’re okay.

We already knew how much Eddie loves his son prior to Eddie Begins, but we see his love and care for Shannon, as well. Plus, we get some sort of recognition that Eddie has much regrets over not being there for Christopher when he was younger. This is significant, particularly if you ship Buddie, but even without a romantic lense, it emphasizes the relationship between Buck and Eddie & Christopher.

The show pushes the idea that Shannon fell short at being a good mother to Christopher. Granted her running away wasn’t great parenting, but so did Eddie, and it’s not like Shannon didn’t try later. (Also that’s a completely different post.) What matters here is that Eddie trusts Shannon with Christopher. While it isn’t easy and he certainly has hesitations about Shannon leaving again and how that instability affects Christopher, it’s not that Eddie doesn’t trust Shannon with caring for Christopher. Eddie expects her to also be his wife and to have his back, and it’s in the emphasis on their marriage and getting a divorce, that focuses in on how much Eddie&Shannon weren’t working, not how much EddieShannon&Christopher were not. They both ran, under different circumstances, and they both stepped up to the plate when it came to caring for Christopher. (Again, it’s a different post for me to go into my thoughts on how them running wasn’t ever out of a lack of love or care for Christopher, and how much it was likely their marriage not working and worries about how that would affect Christopher.)

So, anyways, the point is that Shannon was there to care and love Christopher when Eddie was not. Eddie was there to care and love Christopher when Shannon was/is not. And in the s4 finale, Eddie points out the fact that Buck was there for Christopher when he was not. This, also tied to the having each other’s backs being used with Eddie and Buck in the beginning of s2 and later with Eddie and Shannon, points out that Buck role in Christopher’s life is heavily parental.

In the living room scene about Hildy and video games, the tactic of Christopher switching from reasoning with Eddie to asking Buck is very much the “ask the other parent” strategy. The look Buck gives to Eddie then (similar to the one he gives in the playdate scene in the s3 Christmas episode) is very easily read as “Eddie is the parent,” but Eddie giving Buck a look back becomes permission for Buck to handle it and that’s not just Buck being Eddie’s best friend, but Buck as someone with a parental/guardian role to Christopher. (Also consider Buck’s dynamic with the other kids of the 118–he’s very much and very strictly young fun (uncle) Buck, no?)

And with Christopher running to Buck when he was upset with Eddie and didn’t know how to express everything he was feeling—a moment when Buck was there for Christopher when Eddie couldn’t be, as well as something along the lines of knowing parents talk but still going to the other parent for something you don’t know how to talk to the other about.

The brief phone call was very parental—there’s no discussion regarding why Christopher would go to Buck or if Buck was okay with it or Eddie apologizing for it or any realm of discussion outside of Christopher is okay and Eddie is on his way. Granted, as a parent, priority just being Christopher being okay since he was missing makes a lot of sense. But there’s this underlying sense of “Of course he’s at Buck’s” as well as the innate trust Eddie is displaying with Buck.

This trust in Buck is also seen with Christopher as Christopher opens up to Buck. And the tone Buck takes & the conversation they have, is also fairly parental. Buck’s empathetic to Christopher and he listens and he gets it—he knows how scary it is to feel like you’re losing people—but he’s also pretty clear that Christopher running off wasn’t okay and that he needs to talk to somebody. And then, Buck says Christopher has him and promises that Christopher isn’t going to lose him.

This is an promise of permanence. Buck can’t technically promise he’ll always be there for Christopher—that’s something that cannot be truly certain. And interestingly, Shannon and Eddie have also promised something vaguely forever towards Christopher as well. Notably, in Shannon’s letter about loving Christopher “even if it’s from a distance” and like everything that went on in the flashbacks of Eddie Begins. So, the scene becomes Christopher and Buck recognizing the importance they have to each other.

Which means: Buck knows he cares for Christopher and Eddie. Eddie knows he cares for Christopher. Eddie and Buck knows Christopher cares for both of them. Buck and Christopher are aware of each other caring for each other. Buck’s always been aware how much Christopher means to Eddie. So what’s left?

Eddie recognizing he cares for Buck and the two of them being aware that they both care for each other. The first of which the s4 finale tackles and the second that becomes alluded to by the end of the hospital scene.

There’s a lot of reasons for why that over the year Eddie never told Buck about changing his will. It’s scary, it’s a lot of responsibility, etc. It means that while Eddie is aware of how much Buck loves and cares about Christopher, the responsibility of being a parent is a whole other thing. And yet, Eddie doesn’t really have many doubts about it. Yes, there’s the small thought that just maybe, just maybe, it’s asking Buck for too much—but as it’s said in the finale, Eddie knew Buck wouldn’t refuse.

So why not tell Buck and why tell Buck then? Because Buck needs to know that Eddie cares about him. That in telling Buck earlier or even going to Buck earlier, could come across to Buck as Eddie measuring something—whether that be how much he cares about Christopher or how much he can trust Buck or something else—it leans heavily on Buck means something to Eddie because he cares about Christopher. And while that’s true, that’s not it.

Eddie says he’s telling Buck now because Buck said he thought it would’ve been better if he was the one that got shot. Because Eddie is well aware of Evan risk-taker, doesn’t think before he does, “it would’ve been better if I was shot” Buckley does majority of what he does and thinks majority of what he thinks because he believes he’s expendable—but he’s wrong. And Eddie is trying to show Buck he’s wrong.

That Buck matters to Eddie. That Eddie trusts no one with Christopher the way he trusts Buck. That if he can’t be there, then there’s no one Eddie wants more than Buck to be there for Christopher. It’s a huge responsibility to say, “If I die, you’ll have to take care of my son,” but it’s also privlege. It’s a trust. It’s saying that I’d trust you with my world if I wasn’t around to care for it. If Buck didn’t matter to Eddie, Eddie couldn’t have possibly changed his will like that. If Buck didn’t matter to Eddie, then Eddie wouldn’t have set forth the very possible risks of upsetting the family he has—that Christopher has. That while it comes from caring about his son and wanting the best for him, considering not just what is best for Christopher but what Eddie believes is best for Christopher is very fueled towards caring for Buck.

Because, note that logically there’s a lot of ways that Eddie and Christopher moving back to Texas would’ve been better for Christopher. There’s a lot of ways that Christopher being taken care of by Eddie’s parents that would’ve been better for Christopher. Because it would mean being surrounded by family. It would mean foregoing many of the real financial struggle single-parenting can have. It would mean 100% security that Christopher would have people to care for him—given Eddie’s risky career. And yet, that’s not what Eddie believed was best for Christopher—or at least it wasn’t what he wanted for Christopher. That Eddie would fight tooth and nail to secure a stable and fulfilling life for Christopher on his own, if it may be, if it meant Christopher being with his father. Because Eddie wasn’t there for a few years, and he regretted that, and wanted to be a father for Christopher now that he had a chance to.

So, where logically, leaving Buck to have custody of Christopher if Eddie dies doesn’t make the most sense because Christopher has extended family in both Texas and LA, it was what Eddie thought was best. It was what Eddie thought was right. Almost like how it’s pretty clear Eddie’s parents didn’t like Shannon, and yes their relationship was rocky, but Eddie stands by the similarities in their running from the family and Eddie doesn’t put up with insults on Shannon’s parenting. That while between the two of them, yeah there were issues and they both can agree they weren’t great parents to Christopher in the times they weren’t there, Eddie also doesn’t let it only fall on Shannon, doesn’t stand for implications that Shannon did anything less than love her son and do better when she came back. Like literally the worst part of both of their parenting comes down to the one instance they left. Yes, not great, but, especially as a tv drama, it’s never to say that they don’t know how to be good parents. Outside of leaving, they’re capable of caring for Christopher and loving him fully. (Again that’s a whole other post)

But the point! Is that Buck loves Christopher. Christopher loves Buck. Buck loves Eddie. Eddie loves Buck. And there is no one in the world Eddie trusts more than Buck to be there for Christopher when he can’t be and to fight for Christopher. Both are also notably traits that both Shannon and Eddie display to each other (taking over parenting when the other isn’t present & overall fighting to be part of their son’s life).

All in all, this is to say that the finale points out how much Buck means to Eddie—something that hasn’t be made completely clear before. And by Buck’s face after Eddie says Buck isnt expendable, it’s a bit of a new thing for Buck to realize, too. That while they’re both well aware how much they care for the each other and how much they care for Christopher—there’s been a lack of realizing how reciprocal that care is between the two of them. (Which like romantic shipper goggles on, that’s part of where Shannon&Eddie fell apart. That while they both saw they loved Christopher and loved each other for that, sometimes there was a lack of loving each other outside of that.)

This coming within the same time of them individually starting (sort of for Eddie) romantic relationships, emphasizes a permanence in each other’s lives (that is explained nicely by @/mistmarauder (link will be in reblog/notes).) It considers the many ways that them being best friends and family is a for-life sort of thing, that isn’t bound or restricted by romance or blood or anything of the sort. They chose each other. They choose each other. And whether or not Buddie becomes canon, Buck-Eddie-Christopher are 100% an established family unit within the 118/firefam and the s4 finale was meant to establish that clearly. That where Buck & Eddie naturally pair off as the 118 does, Buck-Eddie-Christopher form one of the smaller family units that are focused on within the 118/firefam.

And if, you want to take it more romantically, Buck and Eddie realizing how much they mean to each other as something reciprocal (so far on Buck’s end, we still need a clearer moment where Eddie goes “oh! Buck cares” but the “are you hurt?” moment came close) is a great continuation for growing feelings and extended slowburn, friends to lovers Buddie-endgame. Like they’ve established Christopher loves Buck, Eddie loves Buck, Buck loves them, and Buck fulfills the sort of parental role well. Not much more checkboxes to fulfill for canon Buddie excepting navigating feelings, epiphanies, and the romance of it all. It’s not set up to only allow for Buddie, so there’s, as usual and expressed, room for other paths of canon, but it’s good set up should they choose that to be the direction they decide they want to go in.

#buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #diaz family #christopher diaz #shannon diaz #911 fox #911 spoilers #talk about an essay #alison speaks?#okay so anon is off bc i don’t trust posting my opinions on things here and idk i don’t think there’s anything bad but yeah #hskajdjskdjdksjdjsj I HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS ABOUT THAT ONE SCENE

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forever-rogue · 3 years

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Afterglow - Part 8

A/N: Is it time for some much need talking? Hmm....perhaps. As always, feedback and comments are welcome, and if you’d like to be tagged, let me know. xx 💕

Pairing: Frankie Morales x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 6.2k

Warnings: drug and alcohol mentions; slight language

AFTERGLOW MASTERLIST

MASTERLIST

»»————-　♡　————-««

You drifted in and out of sleep that night, waiting up several times due to the jolt of a startling nightmare. At first you almost forgot where you were or what was going on - why were you asleep on the couch? But it hit you like a ton of bricks; Frankie Morales was currently asleep in your bed.

A few times throughout the night you’d gotten up and stretched your stiff bones and wandered to the bedroom door, opening it just a crack to peek inside. Each time, Frankie was fast asleep with Daisy next to him. It caused you to relax a little, knowing that he was okay, and you needn’t worry about an overdose or anything like that. But it didn’t ease the pain of seeing him again or knowing that he was struggling with an addiction...or something.

The universe had put an odd situation on your plate.

Once you couldn’t sleep any longer, and had gotten tired of lying on the couch, which it had turned out was not an ideal sleeping situation, you made your way into the kitchen to start breakfast. You weren’t even sure what to do really, but it was a bit of normalcy to offset your otherwise shaken up routine.

As soon as you started the coffee, something that was an absolute necessity, you’d left messages for your clients apologizing for the early call and canceling their appointments due to a last minute emergency. Hopefully they wouldn’t mind. As the coffee percolated filling the kitchen with warmth and the delicious smell, you reached into the fridge and started pulling eggs, bacon, and other items to make breakfast with. Grabbing a bowl and a pan, you quickly settled on pancakes, wondering if they were still his favorite. He’d always loved them when you were younger and on more than one occasion had your little date nights ended in a small 24-hour diner, where’d he chow down on them.

The memory made you smile, as you recalled one particular time when he eagerly topped off his pancakes with fresh fruit and whipped cream, which had gotten on the corners of his mouth. You’d reached over and wiped the whipped cream away, licking it clean from your own finger. It seemed like yesterday, even though it was so long ago.

Sighing, you pushed the memory away and carried on preparing the batter and throwing some bacon into the oven. As soon as your coffee pot signaled that it was done, you grabbed your favorite mug, followed by another and poured the black coffee in. You finished yours off as you liked, topping the other off with a sprinkle of cinnamon. It amazed for a mere fraction of a second just how well you still remembered the things he liked. But your amazement was quickly cut short when you heard a quiet throat clear from the opposite side of the counter.

“H-hi,” he said quietly, almost tentatively as he seemed to look anywhere but your eyes. You took the cup you had prepared for him and set it down in front of him, motioned for him to take a seat at the bar.

“You look like hell,” you commented as he sat and clutched the steaming cup between his hands. He made a small sound of agreement as you turned back to your pan and poured some batter in, “I made it how you used to like it....I presume it’s still the same?”

“Yeah,” he said as he put the mug to his mouth and took a long sip, “thank you.”

“Mhmm,” it was a small, noncommittal sound as you focused your attention on the pancakes and eggs. Daisy came over and you offered her a treat before getting her into the backyard and preparing her breakfast. The tension in the air was palpable and you could see that Frankie was eager to say something. But he didn’t dare to be the one that broke the silence. Gods knew you were just as eager to say something, a lot of things honestly, but all of that could wait for now.

Once everything was finished, you grabbed two plates and piled them high with a spread of items, topping them off with some fresh berries on the side. Daisy had been a good girl, clambering between the two of you, so you offered her a piece of bacon and a few berries, which she eagerly took and ran off with and into her bed to eat.

Handing a plate to Frankie, you set down your own, as far away from him as possible at the small bar. It didn't create a huge divide between you, but the point came across loud and clear.

The two of you ate in silence for some time, the only sound in the kitchen was the scraping of utensils and a few small huffs from Daisy. She gave you an almost pathetic look a few times, and you just rolled your eyes at her. You knew she wanted to be out and in the company of others; once she'd overcome her initial fear of people, she thrived in attention.

"Oh hush," you told her before passing her another strip of bacon, "we'll go for a walk later, good girl. Or maybe you can go play with Eddie."

Frankie remained silent as he watched you, doing his best to keep a smile from stretching across his features. But you were too quick and caught him staring.

"I've been bringing her into the office with me every day," you explained, "she likes being around the people and they often find just as much comfort in her. It's a win-win really."

"Hmm," he commented as he shoved another bite in his mouth, "office? W-what kind of office?”

"Yeah," you said softly, "I, ugh...I'm a therapist.”

He caught your eye and offered you a slightly confused look. Never once had you ever mentioned wanting to be a therapist. In fact, you had wanted to avoid anything you had once deemed similar to your parents as a big no. Coming from a surgeon and a doctor wasn’t a far stretch from a therapist. When the barista at the coffee shop had referred to you as ‘doctor’, he had envisioned...many other things. This was very similar to things you had proclaimed you'd never wanted to be, "oh. I thought you wanted to be a zoologist. That’s what you always wanted to...study animals. UCLA-"

"Yeah," you cut him off sharply, "I did once. In another lifetime. I had to make decisions back then.. Ones I didn't think I'd make or have to make. I thought things were going to play out in a very different way but the joke was on me, right? So, here we are. I'm good at my job and it just...worked out."

"But do you like it?" he asked tentatively as you narrowed your eyes at him. No one ever really asked you that...it was just sort of assumed that you did, or if you didn't, that didn't matter one way or another..

"What does it matter, Francisco? A job is a job," you almost snapped at him, "but yes. For the most part I enjoy my job. I'm glad to be helping people that need it.”

"It just didn't seem like something you wanted to do..." he trailed off softly.

"Well, I also didn't think I'd go to college alone and have to make an entirely different series of choices. I didn’t think you’d just leave me and go into the military - and you were going to leave me in the dark about as long as you could. Remember that?" you knew it was a dig, the lowest of blows, but in that moment you didn't care. Things had ended a long time ago and at the end of the day, it didn't matter anymore, "because I do. So yeah, my life plans changed. But you know about that just as well. How did that work out for you?!"

You hated yourself in that moment, and as soon as the words left your mouth you wished you could take them back. You hated how much venom was lacing your words, how angry you still were with him. It was twenty years worth of pain and hurt bubbling to the surface all at once. And yet - the look on Frankie’s face was enough to make your heart break. Sighing lightly, you tossed the fork onto your plate and slid out of the bar stool. Tears were prickling at the back of your eyes as you held up your hands in surrender, lips trembling slightly. You tried to slick past him, but he reached for your arm to try and hold you back, "honey-"

"I gotta go," you said, pulling out of his grasp as motioned for Daisy to follow you. Nervously looking between the two of you, she trotted over and perked up slightly when you grabbed her leash, "I-I'll be back. I’m sorry.”

You dashed out the door as swiftly as possible, letting it shut softly behind you as Frankie stared at it, a heavily, weary sigh escaped his own lips. Setting down his own fork, he pushed his plate away, no longer feeling hungry. He wasn’t mad at your words, or the spite you still held for him. If anything it made him hurt just as much. He’d always been confused on why and when you finally decided to cut your ties with him, but he never blamed you. If the roles were reversed he might have done the same. But he’d never hated you for it. He could understand why you did what you did. He was just Frankie after all, he wasn’t worth waiting around for you. Just because he’d never let you go, didn’t mean he expected the same of you.

Standing up, he picked up his own plate, followed by yours and brought them to the sink. Turning on the tap, he set everything under the warm water to soak before quickly deciding to just clean up the kitchen then and there. It was the least he could do. Frankie carefully put everything away, making sure everything was going into what he was sure were the proper spots before loading the dishes into the empty dishwasher. He stopped himself when he reached for your empty coffee mug, holding it delicately in his large hands as he examined. It was a soft yellow, covered in little flowers and beehives and bees. A forlorn little smile crossed his features as he decided to hand wash the mug, drying it with the utmost care before putting it away in the cabinet.

The whole process to getting everything clean again took him some time, but by the time he was satisfied with his handiwork you still weren’t back from your walk with Daisy. It gave him pause to wonder if he should just head home or if he should wait for your return. Eventually he decided to opt for the latter, figuring it would be rude to just run out on you. If nothing else, he’d thank you for the help from the previous evening and then leave, but a smaller part of him hoped that you’d ask him to stay. To talk. There was a lot to talk about after so many years.

And yet - there was nothing. The relationship was done. Ended. Nothing.

He went back down the hall to straighten your bedroom up and gather his shoes, but he trekked slowly, taking a moment to study all the pictures on your walls. Some of it was more or less generic artwork, some were photos of you with friends and family over the years. He had admired each of them, how you had changed from the beautiful girl he had fallen in love with to the still beautiful woman he was infatuated with. It was amazing to him that you still looked the same after all this time - the same soft eyes, the same sweet smile, the aura of kindness that seemed to follow you everywhere. He was nothing like he once was, not in his mind anyway, instead of ragged and worn out. A sight for sore eyes.

Shaking his head to himself, he finished the walk back to your room and began to tidy up, making it a point to keep away from anything that looked personal. But in his keen attempt to make your bed, he accidentally knocked over what liked a journal from your nightstand. Groaning at his carelessness, he picked it up and attempted to set it back, but instead, a couple of photographs fell out of it. He swooped them up and curiosity got the better of him as he studied the pictures intently.

They were of you - you and him.

One of them was from one of the winters you shared together, the two of you were bundled up in thick jackets and scarves, Frankie’s old beanie on your head, with the skating rink visible in the background. You both looked so young, so carefree, so happy. You were smiling for the camera but his eyes were slowly focused on you, the grin on his face speaking volumes.

The other one was from Halloween, and the two of you were dressed up as Morticia and Gomez from the Adams Family. Your feeble attempts at costumes had been laughable, but the joy in your faces was undeniable. This time he was smiling for the camera, an arm wrapped tightly around, but you were looking at him as though he was your whole world.

You had kept the photos after all these years. He let out a long breath before tucking them back into the journal and setting it back on your nightstand. As he finished making up the bed and slipping his shoes back on, he heard the front door open, followed by the sound of Daisy’s footsteps. She eagerly nudged open the door and wagged her tail at him, trying to get his attention for pets.

"Frankie?" your soft voice reached his ears as he gave Daisy a nervous look before slipping out of your bedroom. He stood in the hallway, nervously twist his hat in his hands as you stood at the other, an unreadable expression on your face.

"Hey," he softly as you just nodded. The two of you stood there for a moment, silently staring at each other. When you didn't say anything he started walking down the small way, "I should go..."

But before he could slip past you, you reached out and grabbed his wrist in a surprisingly firm, but gentle, manner. He turned and gave you a confused expression, "stay. W-w should talk...instead of just running every time we see each other."

"Okay," he agreed as you gave him a momentary smile before leading him outside, to the small little backyard sanctuary you had created. It was crisp and cool, the promise of fall and new hope with the changing season lingering in the air. Daisy was close at hand, bringing out a toy to play with as sat down at the patio table, Frankie taking a seat at the other end of the table. It was silent for some time before you finally mustered up the courage to talk to say anything.

"I'm sorry for earlier," your voice was quiet but Frankie heard you loud and clear, "I shouldn't have exploded like that at you. It wasn't fair."

"'S okay," he insisted. In his mind he deserved a lot more than just a few angry words. A new silence loomed over you as you watched your dog run around play, easily keeping herself amused.

"I was supposed to get married," you blurted out suddenly and Frankie's attention was hyperfocused on you, his deep brown eyes trying to decipher every expression, "in a few weeks actually."

"Oh," he said casually as he if hadn't noticed that you weren't sporting the huge engagement ring you had been wearing when he first ran into you again, "I-I figured...the ring and all."

"Yeah," you said with a scoff, looking over at him and rolling your eyes dramatically, "was going to. Completely dodged a bullet with that one."

"W-what happened?" he wouldn't deny that the fact that your engagement ended instilled a small sense of hope in him, "if you don't mind me asking..."

"A lot of things, honestly,” you shrugged lightly. It wasn’t a complete lie...there were a lot of factors that ultimately led to your decision. The fact that Frankie had appeared out of the blue, out of nowhere, was just another incidental happenstance that seemed to jog you into making the decision. But you weren’t about to admit that to him...not yet anyway, “I basically realized I was unhappy...that he was everything I never wanted and the life I was leading was the one I had wanted to avoid for so long.”

“Oh,” he completed quietly as you threw up your hands in exasperation, more at yourself than anything else. It was just…a hard situation. It wasn’t easy for anyone and with Frankie right there next to you it was hard not to picture a life with him. What would it all have been like if he had been the one?

“I was becoming...became everything I hated,” you laughed dryly at yourself, casting a quick glance over at him as he was watching you intently, “all those things I said I never would be. I ended up being them. I ended up as this quiet, pathetic excuse of a woman that just did what everyone told her to do, what everyone expected of her. I became the model daughter my parents always wanted - working in what they deemed a proper job, never speaking out of turn, marrying the successful lawyer, never straying from the line. And then...I just realized...this isn’t me. This was never me. It’s not who I’m meant to be. I knew that if I went through with that wedding and everything that came afterwards I would never be happy again. Despite the years of self loathing, I couldn’t do that to myself.”

Frankie was listening intently as you seemed to work this out within yourself as the words poured out of your mouth. He knew exactly what you meant, and at the end of the day, he was proud of you for being able to make the decisions you needed to for yourself, “so you just called it all off?”

“Yeah,” you dabbed at the tears that pearled up and slipped down your cheeks, before laughing lightly. In the moment, it had been a bold, dramatic move, one that you considered almost worthy of a cinematic masterpiece, but looking back on it, you had probably seemed like a mad woman, “basically. It was the day of my last dress fitting and it just...hit me. I was with the dress maker and her niece and they were asking me all about my fiance and asking me if I was excited and how in love we were and everything. And it hit me then and there - I couldn’t do this. So...I bailed and left. Called it off an hour later. You should have seen the poor things! Oh Frankie, they looked so surprised, but they understood. I paid for the dress and I told them to donate it to someone that deserved it.”

“Holy shit,” he breathed out as he pictured the scene. You caught his eye and the two of you started laughing together. Gods, in that moment, it was easy, so easy to just laugh and not think about anything else. It still felt so effortless with him, even despite everything that happened between the two of you, “you just did that!”

“You know what they say about mad women, Frankie,” you teased, taking a moment to collect yourself. Looking back on it now it was funny, but in reality...it had been a harsh end to your previous life and a bumpy start to your new one, “but...at the end of the day it was the right thing to do. I couldn’t marry Chad and just be Mrs. Wadsworth forever.”

“Chad? Wadsworth?” Frankie couldn’t help but snicker at the names as you nodded before hanging your head, giving him just a glimpse of that smile that always made him weak in the knees, “oh honey, you should have known from the name alone.”

“I was a fool,” you admitted with a dramatic sigh, “a self righteous fool. At the time it had seemed...right.”

“Did you love him?”

“I-I suppose I did,” you said softly, “at one point or another. I don’t know where along the line it just ended up as routine and just me going through the motions but obviously it did…”

“I’m sorry you had to do through all of that,” he said quietly as you shrugged. It wasn’t his fault...that was all of your own doing, “how did your family take it?”

“About as well as you'd think,” you bit the inside of your cheek to keep more tears from flowing worth, “you know them, Frankie, they’re the same as they’ve always been. At first it seemed like my mom understood, and she seemed to care, but by the next day it was like a flip had been switched. They had seemed to side with Chad and somehow none of feelings were relevant. And all of the friends we’d had basically decided that I was the bad guy. So it kind of...left me to figure things out on my own. Luckily, I do have a few really good friends left. They helped me out a lot...even to find this house actually. Things could have been a lot worse...they were rough but they’re getting better.”

“Still,” he almost whispered at you, “I’m sorry you had to go through all of that. You don’t deserve it.”

“Such is life,” you looked at him and offered an almost teary smile, “but about you? Did you ever get married or anything?”

“No,” he answered quickly as you tried to ignore the small skip of your heart. He tapped his fingers against the glass top of the table for a few moments, “there was never really...anyone else.”

“Really!?”

“Nope,” he was almost nervous as he swallowed the lump in his throat, “I was in the military for a long while...overseas, special ops...never really had much chance to worry about that kind of stuff back then.”

“What about when you got out?”

“There were a few here and there,” he admitted quietly, “nothing serious, nothing that lasted more than a few months.”

“Oh,” it was your turn to be surprised. For some reason he had struck you as the type that would have settled down...the type of man that would almost yearn for domestic bliss. Little did you know he did exactly that, just not with anyone that he encountered so far.

“Yeah,” he exhaled sharply through his nose, “it hasn’t been much of an exciting life.”

“Surely it must have been,” you insisted, “special ops? That sounds like it be one adventure after another...but it was the military…”

“I was glad to get out when I got out,” he insisted and you could tell there was a lot more he wanted to say. But he tensed up lightly and you weren’t going to push him to tell you anything. If he wanted to, he would, but as far as you were concerned he owed you nothing. And yet...a small part of you hoped he did still want to open up and confide in you.

“What...what do you do now?”

“I’m a mechanic,” he stated simply and pointedly looked away from your eyes. He didn’t know if he wanted to see the expression in them, to know if you suddenly thought him to be much lower, “it’s nothing much but I-”

“It’s brilliant, Frankie,” you insisted, quickly cutting him off and causing his head to whip in your direction, a small smile tugging on the corners of his mouth, “you had always had a knack for stuff like that - it never made any sense to me, but you? You always had a sharp mind.”

“I was a pilot too!” he eagerly told you, and you could have died at the excited expression on his face, “in the military and…”

“And what, Frankie?” you asked, noticing the rapid change in his mood, almost as if he hadn’t meant to tell you quite that much. He stilled for a moment before looking away, “Frankie?”

“And for a while after that for private individuals,” he almost murmured, “but umm...n-not at the moment.”

“Okay,” you replied, telling him in that one word that he never needed to go past what was comfortable for him, “Frankie, I’m glad that things worked out for you...really.”

He just nodded, and gave you a weary look before silence fell over the two of you again. You pulled your knees up to your chest and hugged them, watching as Daisy sniffed everything before bringing her ball over to Frankie. He gently took it from her and tossed it across the yard, repeating the action several times over before she grew bored of it and went to follow around a squirrel.

After some time, you cleared your throat, deciding that now was as good of a time as any to lay everything out on table. What was the worst that just happen? He would get mad, you would get mad and then he left? It wouldn't put you in a worse position than before. There was literally nothing left to loose, and you'd hate yourself if you didn't at least tell him. If nothing else, you would get it all off of your chest.

"T-there was another reason I called off my wedding..." you admitted and slowly shifted his gaze back to you, "umm, everything kind of...I realized how unhappy I was and that things weren't right after...after running into you. That day at the coffee shop when I spilled coffee all over myself."

Frankie tried his best to keep his expression neutral but it felt like a swarm of butterflies had just been released into his stomach. He was trying not to read too much into your words but he was loathe to deny his excitement. That meant you had felt it too; he wasn't wrong in thinking it was just him. He looked at you to go on, making a small sound in his throat, "I-I remember..."

"It set off...something," you said softly, "and that's what caused me to realize everything else."

"If nothing else, I'm glad the spilled coffee led you to realizing that you deserve better...that you deserve the world..."

"I...I never stopped loving you," the words shot out of your mouth before you could do anything to stop them and Frankie's jaw dropped and practically hit the floor, "seeing you made me realize that...there was never anyone else that I could ever love because they weren't you. Even after everything that happened, all this time, it always came back to you."

"Honey bee," the nickname flowed easily and you didn’t bother to correct him. You liked the way it sounded, you had missed it even. It was so much better than sugar plum, which still made you cringe to even think about, “you…”

“I know,” you said quietly, bringing your hands up to your face as you tried to hide and make yourself feel smaller. You hadn’t, not in a million years thought you would see him again, let alone admit this to him or yourself, “I just...the more I thought about it, especially with Chad, I kept comparing everything to you. Even if I didn’t admit it out loud to myself, that’s one of the main things that it was. It was always you.”

“I-I don’t understand…” he said quietly, “you never...I called you and you never called me back. I thought...I thought...why?”

“I know,” you admitted, “I just...I couldn’t, Frankie. You left me and I hung around waiting for you all the time. My life revolved around waiting for to call, or email, any little hint from you. It wasn’t healthy - I was missing out on so much, because I was always waiting around for you. I couldn’t do that anymore, to wait to hear from you from an hour once every two months whenever you got the chance? It wasn’t fair to me or you. So I just...decided not to anymore.”

“But I-I came back,” he said meekly as you shrugged lightly.

“When? How many hours was your life devoted to the military? How many years were you gone for the majority of the year? It wouldn’t have been fair to me to have to wait for you, and it wouldn’t have been fair to you either, to only get to see me once in a while. Wasn't it easier to just not have to worry about it?” you tried to rationalize it to yourself and him at the same time. But as the words left your mouth you wondered if it had been easier that way. Maybe it would have been easier, maybe you would have been happier if you’d tried to make it work...but now you would never know.

“I don’t know,” he sighed heavily as he leaned his elbows on the table and rubbed his tired eyes, “I don’t know...but I do know it was hard for you.”

“You left me Frankie,” you said softly, trying not to cry again as you thought back to the day you had discovered that he was leaving for the military. It had been the worst day of your life back then. It still was to this day, “we made all these plans, our future, and you left me.”

“I did what I had to do back then,” he said softly, and while you never believed, even back then, you knew he had his reasons. You knew that the choices he made for all calculated and thought out - he was never one for rash decisions, “the choices I made helped become the man I am now. And look where you needed up - a therapist. A successful therapist. That counts for something, right?”

“I know....I know you did. I understand that now. A small part of me still thinks I would have rather have been with you, Frankie,” you said softly, turning to face him and resting your head on your knees, “even looking back on everything now. I wish you would have let me come with you -”

“So what?” he almost snapped and you jumped slightly at the sudden change in his voice, “you could have been some military wife that’s never happy?”

“I would have been happy with you!” you retorted with just as much edge as he had given you, “I would have been happy if I got to be anywhere with you. You were my everything, Frankie, and that never changed.”

“You would have been alone half the time,” he sighed heavily, “and I never...I never wanted you to have to worry if I was dead or alive or if I was coming back at all.”

You remained silent as you mused over his words. He had a point...if you had been with him, when he was overseas, you would have been wondering every minute of every hour if he was alright or not. That was a fate almost as cruel if not more so than what you were put through.

“I wanted you to have a chance at happiness,” his tone softened as he looked at you with big brown eyes. They were full of emotion, holding so many things inside of them, “without me you had a shot.”

“I thought I did too,” you agreed, your lips trembling effort to keep from crying. Gods, you felt like you had been crying more recently than you had in many years, “turns out we were both wrong.”

“Yeah?”

“In some ways I wished I’d just gone with you anyway,” you shrugged and he made a small sound. You were both stubborn fools in your own ways, “in some other ways I wish I never met you.”

It felt like his whole world stood still as he cautiously met your eyes. Now those were words he never thought he’d hear you saying. He opened and closed his mouth a few times before stumbling over his words, “w-what? I thought…”

“If I had never met you, I never would have missed you,” you explained, “I never would have gone through the heartbreak of you leaving, of loving you and looking for you in everything and everyone else, never finding you. I would have been…”

“Maybe you’re right…”

“Yeah...but I’m not,” you concluded, “because if I had never met you, I would have never been loved by you, or gotten to love you. I never would have...discovered how to be myself. You showed me that it was okay to be different from my family, to be my own person. It worked...even if I got lost along the way and things changed. At the end of the day, it was you. And just when I was about to make the biggest mistake of my life, you came back. Out of all the times. That-that has to mean something right?”

Just like that every piece of his heart that had felt like it had hardened and decayed over the years seemed to come back to life. His heart started racing in his chest as he stared at you, long and hard, and you stared back with just as much ferocity and intensity. You were thinking the same thing he was - the timing, you both coming back together, it couldn’t be for naught. It just couldn’t. The universe was a strange and wondrous thing, but maybe...maybe this time it was getting it right…

“M..maybe…” Frankie stood up as you tried to collect your thoughts and slowly strode over to you. Extending his hand slowly, he held it out to you and you stared at it for just a moment, contemplating taking it. Taking his hand was a lot more than just the simple action of taking his hand, you were both well aware of that fact. Swallowing the lump in your throat, you let him help you to your feet, and you stood directly in front of him, “Francisco.”

His large hands found your face, his touch gentle and saccharine as you relished in the feel of his soft, yet calloused skin on yours. Your lips parted slightly as he traced over the highs and lows of your features, making it a point to commit this version of you deep into his mind, just like he had twenty years ago when you were younger. His thumb swiped along your lower lip and your body was practicing screaming for him to touch you, to kiss you, anything.

“You are still as beautiful as the day I first laid eyes on you,” he whispered, inching incrementally closer and yet not close enough, “honey bee, I loved you then and I never stopped. I will never stop.”

“Francisco,” it was a soft plea as your hands found his wrists, gripping onto them tightly and vowing to never let go, “please.”

Please kiss me. Please don’t ever leave me again. Please just love me.

It was so many things all in one simple word.

“May I kiss you?” he leaned in and his lips were practically ghosting over yours, his breath warm and sweet. You nodded quietly before closing the almost nonexistent gap between your bodies, weaving your arms around his neck as his hands found purchase on your hips.

It was slow, sweeter almost than honey as he kissed you, and you allowed yourself to get lost in him. If you thought kissing him back then had been amazing, this was that and then some. Every part of him melded perfectly against you, an ease to your movement like neither of you had to think or even try. It was like it had always been meant to be. In some ways, you supposed it was. It was always supposed to be you and your Frankie.

“I love you, Frankie,” you murmured against his lips when you parted for a breath of air, “it was always you.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

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