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medium-rare-bimbo · 10 months

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Perv! Eddie munson x naive! Innocent! Reader

♡Smoking with Eddie <3

☆ if there are any spelling and grammar mistakes no there arent

♡masterlist♡

MINORS DNI

contains: Dubcon, drugs, darkish! Eddie

༺*:ﾟ･✧･:*:ﾟ･♡ readmore ♡･ﾟ:*:･✧･ﾟ:*༻

When he invited you over to his trailer you first thought that he need extra help with his english work, which was true he did need help with his english work but that wasnt why he invited you over. He had noticed the interest you had expressed around getting high, it started off as innocent questions that he didnt think much of such as;

"why do people get high?" "do all drugs feel the same?" "Why do you do drugs?" And much more similar questions, eddie was heavily against it when he picked up your unsubtle questions however after some heavy thinking (and masturbating), maybe having you fuzzy and malleable was a good thing, if he was lucky he would get you so high you wouldnt remember the groping he'd do.

You had arrived to his trailer with your bag filled with school and revision work, you had been hesitant to knock afraid that he hadnt actually wanted you to come over and it was all a misunderstanding, overthinking on your part. fortunately for eddie you pushed aside the anxieties and knocked. Almost immediately eddie opened the door as if he was waiting for your knock, he quickly invited you into his room, sitting you on the bed, you begin to open your bag to pull out the equipment before he stopped you. "Actually.. I- uh I was thinking we could do that later y'know? Like let's- lets hang out for a little"

"Oh yeah sure! What do you have in mind?" You quickly closed your bag placing it near the end of his bed, looking up at him, you noticed the slight nervousness that radiated off him

"We can um- read some comics- just dont touch the ones you find under my bed or the ones in my bedside table they're- uh they're... limited addition? Yeah limited addition, definitely dont want anyone to touch them-" his voice cracks inbetween words as he desperately tries kick one of the "comics" in question under his bed "- o-or we can just talk.."

"I dont mind it if we just talk, i- I don't really like comics that much.. no offense or anything I'm sure they're great!"

Eddie released a breath he didnt know we was holding in and awkwardly sat on his bed next to you, glancing at you as the room became silent minus the low sound of his mixtape playing in the background.

"So um how is the hellfire going? I heard that will byers joined recently that must be fun h-hes a sweet kid I used to babysit him, sometimes I'd join in with the game but I never understood it-" your face turned hot as you spoke slightly embarrassed that you were saying this to the dungeon master himself "s-sometimes steve and Jonathan tried to join but they didn't know much either so it made me feel better about it. One time nancy joined and got so-"

He cut you off "are you close with Jonathan and steve?" His nose flared and hands clenched as he asked you

"I mean i guess- i-i um I used to babysit will and dustin and- and sometimes I still do so it's hard to not be close to them y-y'know?"

"Do you like them?"

"I- what of course I do they're my friends-"

"No- do you like LIKE them?"

You breathed in feeling exposed and vulnerable letting tears well in your eyes the thought if your fleeting crush being so visible mortified you "I- well I um- I used to have a small crush on both of them like a long time ago b-but I never tried anything! I dont like them anymore- I-" he placed his hand on your thigh

"Hey hey hey its okay I was only asking, I'd go for steve 'the hair' harrington too" he joked, quickly easing your nerves and calming you from the breakdown you were possibly about to have. Soon the conversation picked up and you both began talking about school, games, music, life and anything that crossed your mind. Eddie had seen the way you reacted to his questions and a part of him felt bad for upsetting you, he didnt mean to make you almost cry, he just wanted to know if he had any competition he didnt mean to embarrass you.

The conversation soon died down lulling you both in a comfortable silence, clearing his throat "do you um- do you mind if I smoke? I know you dont do that stuff so I just wanted to ask incase-"

Almost like a dog being asked to go on a walk your eyes lit up and you nodded your head cutting him off from his sentence "yes sure go ahead I dont mind i- this is your room" Eddie exhaled and pushed himself near the wall of his bed, he sat snug in the corner and put his hand between the mattress and the wall pulling out a box containing his secret stash and various pre rolled blunts and joints, he had hid before you came thinking that seeing it would scare you off. he pulled out a joint looking at you for approval before lighting it, as he dragged the joint to his lips he took notice of your eyes following his movements, the way your pupils would dilate when he flicked his tongue out to dampen his lips.

He inhaled the drug, holding it in his lungs before exhaling away from you, he smirked as you watched the smoke crawl around the room. "D'ya wanna try it?" Your head whipped back to face him, you looked at him with wide eyes before trying to form a sentence that he could understand

"I've never done anything like that so- so I dont know how um I- think you should just- um just do it" you avoided his gaze that bore into you, he grabbed your hand and tugged you closer to him forcing you to shuffle to get closer to him , he placed the joint near your lips

"Its easy, all you gotta do is breathe in and breathe out-"

"Like breathing?"

"Exactly like breathing sweetheart" he smiled pushing it closer to your lips, your hand holding his trying to comfort yourself aswell as allowing yourself to push it away at any moment. You looked him in his eyes as you took a drag, holding back a groan he waited a moment for you to pull back and exhale. unfortunately when you did you immediately started choking on your breath, tears brewing in your eyes and falling as the coughing continued eddie chuckled and patted you on the back praising you despite your fail.

"You did so well for your first time, so good even if you did choke a little. How about we try again-"

You shook your head as soon as the words left his mouth "nuh uh, no. s'too hard hurt my chest" you said, voice wavering still trying to recover from the assault on your lungs. Eddie smiled and lay back patting his chest for you to lay on it, he took a drag and let you wiggle yourself across his bed, your leg straddled his thigh, tangling themselves with his. Sighing into his chest you breathed in his scent feeling better now that you had some comfort

Your head lay on his chest where he raised a hand to your hair and started to trace patterns and shapes into the side of your head gliding his fingers through the baby hairs along your neck and up the side of your cheeks, he pulled your head up and leaned down, you tried to back away not wanting to take advantage of his high state, as his lips were centimetres away from yours he blow his smoke into your mouth, this time you didnt choke. As he pulled back he looked at your large pupils and smiled "y'like that?" You didnt respond too awestruck with what had just occured, unconsciously dragging yourself forward to get closer to him.

Eddie took another drag, before repeating his actions, he didnt think it would take much to get you feeling warm, you were a virgin in this field and he was a prostitute. You lay your head back on his chest looking up at him with adoration, the drug clearly kicking in. Eddie began his plan and moved his free hand from your head taking his time to feel your body as he makes his way down to your thighs.

You melted as he pulled you closer forcing your clothed cunt to press against his thigh, taking this as a hint, he took a drag and blew the remnants into your mouth. Your hips, without your control, began rocking against his thigh making him groan under his breath, your eyes were half lidded and your hands were resting on his chest, "that feel good?"

You slowly nodded "makin' me all fuzzy" as you continued your grinding

"Yeah? You like it?" He cooed at you. pushing his leg up to meet your lazy thrusts, moaning, you dumbly nodded your hips jerking up against him trying to get release, something you've never had before. Eddie softly bounced his leg, forgetting about the joint and placing it on his table moving his hand to your hips, pulling you flushed against him, the other groped around your body feeling as much flesh as he could manage to get his hands on.

"Eddie feels s'good 'like it- f-feels nice w-want more"

"Yeah? M'not giving you enough? You're so greedy"

He pressed you down on his bulge, your clit knocking against the zipper of his pants causing you to jolt away from it as if it burnt you. Eddie forced you to stay put letting you sit up to look down at him, he let you continue your pathetic thrusts letting you get used to the feeling of direct contact to your clit before guiding you like before.

"Ah- eddie! Again!- w-wan' more"

You whined from above him as you could feel your orgasm build up, your panties were now soaked seeping into the material and ruining his pants. luckily eddie enjoyed that he could feel your juices against him, pulling you down harsher he bucked his hips against yours pushing you over the edge refusing to stop even when you cried that you coudlnt take it.

"S'too much eddie stop! S'too much feels weird don' like it eddie dont like it"

"Ssshh-shut up- shut the fuck up- oh god fuck- take it for me c'mon fucking take- make me feel good baby-"

Eddie was in heaven right now and hed be damned if he let your overstimulation ruin it for him. he continued to use you for his own purpose soon flipping you over so you lay under him, thrusting against your clothed pussy which was now soaked and puffy from his abuse. The sight beneath him was a sight for sore eyes. youre face soaked with tears, drool coating your lips, a light bucking of your hips, it pushed him over the edge forcing him to cum in his pants like he was a virgin.

His head fell into the side of your neck as he prolonged his orgasm, your legs flinching as he grazed over your clit once more. Desperate for comfort you moved your face to muzzle the side of his head, he tilted your face and kissed your drool coated lips "did s'good for me baby, so so soo good" eddie pulled you up turning you around and pressed you back against his chest, one of his hands resting on your spine and the other in your hair.

When you woke up the next day you were none the wiser on why you were laying on top of eddie or why your thighs were so sticky, you barely remembered last night but you assumed it had been good because eddie was smiley the entire day

"Was last night good? I dont remember"

"Oh absolutely you were so high, you'll get a higher tolerance as you get used to it we can do this again if you want" almost as if god was on his side you agreed

#stranger things x reader #eddie munson x reader #eddie x reader #dark eddie munson #eddie munson smut #perv x reader #perv!eddie #perv!eddie munson #perv eddie munson #perv eddie #innocent reader #innocent!reader #x innocent reader #eddie munson x innocent!reader

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hattersarts · 10 months

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gomens s2 thoughts, all spoilers!

I spent 10 hours talking to my housemate about the season after we binged the whole thing in the morning but here are the highlights and the biggest takeaways from the season.

okay i did love the ending, i love that we get the conformation of love AND going into the divorce arc next season (if they're not properly together by the end of season 3 however, i am rioting) they're slow burn and a whole season of them getting to the final 10mins was tasty.

HOWEVER. it was an extremely clunky season when it comes to writing, lots of either set ups missed OR set ups repeated 4 times that they're drilled into out heads. there was also lots of dialogue that really needed to be tightened up. the lesbians were so poorly written i thought they might have needed to be cut BUT they just needed to have more bearing on the rest of the plot AND say things like real people would say things and LITERALLY SHOW ONE SINGLE REASON WHY THEY WOULD LIKE EACH OTHER WITHIN THE FIRST EPISODE.

gabe/bulz romance was the one that should have been cut, have them do more of a oh-my-god-my-boss-sucks kind of thing, lean into them complaining about having to avert a civil war after armageddon stopped and touch on the "structural problems" the angels mention later. Have gabe/bulz be super punished for working together which puts huge fear into az and crowley about what happens if you try to team up as an angel/demon pair (but an extra reason why az takes the job at the end so he and crowley can be the same)

imo it works more if the only mirror of their romance is the HUMANS which should lean into themes to season 3 of how they need to team up with humans (re:"us vs them" line at the end of season 1) to actually achieve their happy ending.

Nina and maggies best scene was their last one telling crowley he needed to talk to az but i think that was one that needed to be cut, it would have been far more satisfying to have crowely work out it out himself that he loves az and wants to tell him (still via maggie and nina but more subtle rather than them telling him to his face AND via spending more time with az in the season)

flashbacks were all pretty good, loved the jobe one and that final "lonely" scene. the nazi one needed some trimming the most (why did all three come back to earth, it made scenes too crowed, have them fight to be a zombie)

shax was disappointing, she was kind of just incompetent the whole way through which didnt make the stakes very exciting, (that whole scene of her talking to the legion was unfunny and pointless) i wanted crowley to mentor her more like when he gave her advice in the first few meetings we saw (kind of in a very non-demonic way, not expecting anything in return) and her to then meet him on equal footing in the finale. would have been a little accidental taste for Crowley to have his good deeds come back to haunt him while showing he's different to demons.

speaking of the finale fight, that halo had NO set up, it was sick as hell but ??? the fuck did that come from. the fight should have been won by az and crowley performing another HUGE miracle together, discorporating the demons (which then would alert heaven and hell something was up in the bookshop and the final scene can happen)

az taking the job from metatron was very good, its consistent with his character where he still hasn't let go of his faith in good/god, he's only been upset by the angels running heaven and still has faith in the system while crowley has realised none of it works and it's only them together that matters. it was nice to show he still hasn't truly accepted crowley for who he is now (tho imo he knows he loves him, he just hasn't quite unrepressed himself) and him not turning down the job after crowley confesses to him shows he still thinks he can fix it. Crowley on the other hand thinks he's now lost him, az has broken he the trust he had in him, he's going to be in big depression mode

few thoughts of good directions for S3:

finally delivering on what crowley said at the end of S1 I think is the most satisfying. the final showdown should be humans Vs heaven/hell with Crowley and az on the human side, helping them win the conflict. there would be suggestions that this is actually god's ineffable plan, this is a conflict she wants to happen and the things that Crowley and az went through are what make them perfect ambassadors to help the humans.

the set up for az in S3 to finally work out he and Crowley can't work out within the unfair rules of the system and for him to abandon heaven (tho not I think, becoming a demon) is good. a sucky ending imo for season 3 is if az somehow "fixes" heaven and via bureaucracy and not via blowing it all up.

growth moments for Crowley in S3 might be having more contact with humans since he's already abandoned hell and it would put az & crowley on similar footing (as az very much loves humans already) when they decided to side with humans for a humans Vs heaven/hell conflict.

anyway, gay people

#this is all the surface stuff really #im having fun re-plotting the episodes for thr same end but tweaked to be more satisfying

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dreamerwitches · 30 days

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Scene Zero for Dummies

I'm going to be a martyr and list out all the important plot beats for scene zero so that no one else has to slog through it like me. Let's goooo

Scene 1

Mabayu loves movies, is bad at socialising and lying, is most likely autistic, very lazy and works at her aunt's - Sakie - cafe. She's a year above most of the girls at school, in Mami's year.

While watching a movie, time pauses because of Homura and Mabayu gets paused too. She can resume the paused TV when she touches it.

Time pauses at school for her and she uses this time to copy a students answers during a test.

Mabayu sees Kyubey outside but Sakie doesn't see them, thinking she saw Amy. A cat that visits outside the cafe regularly.

Mabayu has a soul gem ring but doesn't remember where she got it from. She has no idea she is currently a magical girl.

At the cafe Mabayu gets a sudden vision of Amy getting hit by a car. She goes outside and sees it happened and Madoka is crying over her. Madoka and Sakie go to the vet with Amy while Mabayu looks after the cafe.

Amy suddenly gets better at the vet with the vets declaring it a miracle. This was because Madoka made her wish to save Amy.

The school goes on an annual visit to an auto plant (what a lame school trip huh). Mabayu accidentally wanders into a witch's labyrinth but Mami pulls her out with her ribbons.

Meanwhile, parts of episode 10 are happening during this. Homura is in her second loop. Eg. tells Madoka in class she's a magical girl too. Homura actually tells Mami and Madoka about her wish and being from the future here but the two have a hard time believing it.

Homura struggles fighting witches so Mami actually gives her a book on how to make explosives (guess she didnt look it up online this time eh?)

Mabayu follows Mami after being curious of her being a magical girl (she still doesn't know about them) but Mami acts weirdly saying she'll kill her (I have no idea why this is so out of character). Mabayu runs away in fear into a Bartels barrier and it kills her and later Mami (sigh)

Episode 10 plays out where Madoka becomes Kriemhild and Homura finds out about witches

Film 2

Mabayu is surprised to wake up at the beginning of the loop and thinks everything was a dream.

Kyubey finally approaches Mabayu saying they've already made a contract with Mabayu.

The Amy incident happens just the same as last time as Mabayu forgets to interfere.

Meanwhile, Homura is unsure about sharing the truth with others.

Mabayu uses her magic at school. She can turn invisible in her magi form by bending light. Her magic can also let her hear conversations from a way away as well as basically zoom in in real life.

She spies on Madoka and Mami in Mami's apartment. Homura enters, telling them not to listen to Kyubey but doesn't elaborate as she doesn't think they're ready yet.

Mabayu wants to find Homura's address at school so she can meet her but cannot find it in the staff room.

At the auto plant visit, Madoka and Homura fight the witch with Homura finally explaining her past. (but not the truth about witches) Madoka is fine with this, trusting Homura. Homura isn't ready to tell Mami yet.

Kyubey makes contact with Sayaka but she is dissuaded from contracting by Homura.

Sayaka knows about Madoka being a magical girl and is a little jealous she's so amazing. The scene with Kyosuke plays out ala episode 4 and she is swayed to contract.

Homura encounters Elly similar to Madoka in episode 4 and Sayaka saves her.

Madoka, Sayaka and Homura find Anja and Kyoko interrupts like in episode 5. Sayaka is suspicious that Homura knows Kyoko's name but is hesitant about telling Sayaka the truth.

Ala episode 10, Homura meets with everyone to tell them the truth. She tells them about witches but Mami and Sayaka don't fully trust her.

At the hospital, Sayaka wants to visit Kyosuke but Hitomi is already there. She overhears him saying he thinks Hitomi's visits are what cured his hand and Sayaka is very upset.

Sayaka's suffering arc plays out with it ending in Mami's breakdown.

Madoka and Homura fight Walpurgis with it ending in Homura killing Madoka before she can become Kriemhild. Mabayu resets along with Homura.

Film 3

Homura becomes coolTM

Homura shoots Kyubey outside Madoka's home, believing them to be dead now.

At home, Homura realises she can't tell the truth to anyone and will kill Walpurgis on her own. Mabayu arrives in her home, telling her Kyubey isn't dead.

The girls are two late and Madoka saves Amy, becoming a magical girl.

Homura is mad at Mabayu for spying on her and Mabayu gets nervous, running away.

Madoka is fighting the Minotaur witch at the auto plant but is struggling. Mabayu tries to help, using her weapon for the first time.

Homura stops time, stepping in. Mabayu is shocked Homura was going to abandon this Madoka just because she's contracted. Homura explains she doesn't want to connect to Madoka to feel the pain all over again because she knows she'll have to reset eventually in this loop.

Mabayu has a future vision. This shows that Homura can win but Mabayu will die. Knowing this is the best outcome, she goes along with it, dying.

Mami rushes over, upset at Mabayu's death. She later dies by Charlotte despite Madoka's warning. The two fight Walpurgis but fail.

Film 4

Mabayu visits Homura and both of them remember the last loop. She is at first rude but soon thanks Mabayu for sacrificing herself for the best outcome.

The two team up with Homura killing Kyubey outside Madoka's home again.

Kyubey visits Mabayu at home but she plays dumb, pretending to not understand them. She makes up a warning that if Kyubey tries to make Madoka contract something terrible will happen.

Meanwhile, Homura deals with Mami by making a truce. She'll tell her where witches will appear with her past knowledge so that she won't make any other girls contract.

Mabayu and Homura discover that the car that hits Amy was caused by a witch so they find the cause, defeating a familiar.

At the auto plant, Mabayu manages to stop Madoka and Sayaka from falling into the witch's barrier by helping them find the exit. Mabayu and Homura successfully fell the witch.

Unfortunately, Kyubey manages to meet Madoka and Sayaka, talking to them.

Kyubey tells Mami about these new candidates but since she made a deal with Homura she refuses.

Mabayu and Homura deal with Gertrud but Sayaka is injured in the crossfire. Homura uses this to warn Madoka from contracting as its dangerous.

Madoka approaches Homura and Mabayu, asking about magical girls. She is sad about Homura fighting alone and wants to help but Homura tells her adamantly not to.

Mabayu is worried that if Homura keeps telling Madoka about the danger of being a magical girl, she'll just want to help Homura more. Mabayu suggests they emphasise the fact she will no longer be human. Homura wonders if telling her the truth will help.

Madoka gets lost in Charlotte's labyrinth at the hospital. Homura decides to tell Madoka the truth about witches. Madoka then makes a wish to save Charlotte from despair, creating a strangely coloured Nagisa.

The girls then have to look after Nagisa who acts similarly to usual but more childishly. The group think that they can deal with Nagisa by fulfilling her wish.

Nagisa has nightmares of killing Mami as Charlotte and begins to think she's not a good person. She goes on a rampage, killing witches as well as Kyoko.

This film explains Mabayu's mother's backstory. She had a future vision that was never wrong but one day saw that she was going to die of illness and it broke her. She became a different person, begging no one to approach her in hospital.

Seeing no option to save Nagisa, Mabayu uses her magic to alter her memories. She cuts it like a film, removing her memories of killing Mami and Kyoko.

Nagisa gets a cheesecake baked by Sakie.

The girls fight Walpurgis and Nagisa is finally at peace so disappears. Homura resets

Film 5

Homura states they cannot let Madoka know about witches as they'll have another mess like Nagisa to deal with.

At the auto plant, Mabayu helps out Madoka and Sayaka again. Homura freezes time and kills Kyubey so that they cannot talk to Madoka and Sayaka.

Homura has sent Mami to another city so that she's out of their hair.

Mabayu is tasked with stalling Madoka and Sayaka from running into a witch at the mall but she's nervous about talking to them. Mabayu decides to ask Sayaka if she wants to work at her aunt's cafe.

Sayaka asks Mabayu why she wanted to hire her for work. Mabayu states she knows she collects DVDs but Sayaka is suspicious of how she knows so. Mabayu tries to lie but Sayaka sees right through her.

Kyubey tries to contact Sayaka to contract but she doesn't understand what they're saying.

Homura defeats Charlotte in the hospital. Kyubey appears and Mabayu uses a borrowed gun to kill them, masking it in the public space as a fire extinguisher going off.

Mabayu discovers that Madoka and Sayaka visited the hospital to see Kyosuke. Both Mabayu and Homura were unaware of him before now.

Homura asks Mabayu to see into the future but in it Sayaka has contracted. Homura realised she overlooked Sayaka while focusing on Madoka.

Homura is mad at Sayaka so prepares to fight her however Mabayu butts in. She doesn't want Sayaka to get hurt so asks Homura to let her deal with Sayaka instead. She plans on becoming her friend so she won't turn into a witch or have a bad effect on Madoka.

Kyoko doesn't interfere with Sayaka as she doesn't visit Mitakihara in this timeline.

Mabayu continues to fail at becoming closer friends with Sayaka as she's too bad at conversations. She's also put off by the fact she thinks of herself more as a senpai (an older classmate) than a friend.

Sayaka later fights Elsa Maria with Homura aiding. She is mad at Homura and an incident makes Mabayu appear where she was previously invisible. Sayaka is mad that Mabayu was working with Homura all along. The three tussle but oh what a surprise, Madoka contracts to make Sayaka no depress any more wow

Madoka and Sayaka fight Walpurgisnacht but fail, Homura resetting time.

Film 6

Mabayu apologises for messing up but Homura is fine with it since they learnt a lot. She honestly doesn't want to kill Sayaka at the end of the day.

Mabayu hires Sayaka again but this time knows her better, pointing out her love of classical music.

Sayaka discovers Mabayu is a magical girl but the two seem on good terms about it. Mabayu explains what she can remember of her wish (as it is still unknown to her) and that it was a wish for another person.

Kyosuke's tantrum from episode 4 plays out as Mabayu watches in hiding.

Sayaka is about to make her wish but Mabayu intervenes. She tries to dissuade her but fails.

Mabayu and Sayaka go witch hunting together. Mabayu chooses a song for Sayaka to fight to which apparently improves her strength.

Mabayu spies on Hitomi and Sayaka having their conversation like in episode 7. Mabayu is unsure how to cheer Sayaka up from this.

Sayaka asks Mabayu if she can see into the future about Hitomi's confession but backpedals, losing confidence. Mabayu hopes Sayaka will confess instead.

Sayaka seemingly decides to confess but Kyubey tells her she's no longer human and loses her resolve.

Sayaka faces Elsa Maria like usual.

Sayaka skips school the next day and later is found on the Soul-gem-throwing-bridge and does the deed herself. Unfortunately, this hustle makes Madoka contract whoops (she's really an idiot in scene zero huh)

Reset time whee

Film 7

Mabayu decides against letting Sayaka contract this time.

Mabayu pretends she has fortune telling abilities, trying to dissuade Sayaka from thinking about a contract and suggests maybe raising money for surgery for him instead.

Mabayu fucks up and Sayaka contracts anyway wow

Homura realises that Sayaka absolutely can't contract because clearly she's a fucking idiot

Madoka becomes a magical girl for Sayaka NEXT

Film 8

After Sayaka has the Kyosuke incident of 2011, Mabayu decides to cut her memories of it. She reveals that the target has to be thinking of the memories in order for her to cut them (great writing there…)

Walpurgisnacht comes and Madoka contracts, becoming Kriemhild.

Film 9

Mabayu practices fighting witches alone

Wow nothing really happens in this one huh. But it seems like the loops are finally getting to Mabayu mentally

Film 10

Homura and Mabayu leave town to stock up on grief seeds but Mabayu is killed by Kyoko

Kyoko kills Mami too wow thats so out of character…

Film 11

Mabayu realises that she continues fighting because of her admiration for Homura.

Kyubey suggests Mabayu replaces Madoka as the big entropy ending power source

Film 12

Mabayu suggests they get Mami to help them but Homura is against it

Homura instead recruits Kyoko, swaying her with the promise of plenty of grief seeds

Homura and Mabayu grow a little closer with Homura allowing her to call her by her first name. This makes Mabayu upset I think because she’s worried about getting too close with Homura

Kyoko tells Mami the truth about witches. Mabayu decides to cut Mami’s memories but sees herself in them, leading toooo

Film Mami Tomoe

Wow Mami is finally important thank fucking god! This is set before everything btw

Mabayu meets Mami with Kyubey and decides on a wish quickly. To remove her mother’s future sight so she no longer knows about her predicted death.

Mami and Mabayu work together by Mabayu holding back but using her future sight and Mami fighting for her, sharing the grief seed.

After an incident with a rookie magical girl, Mabayu learns she can cut memories. The girl seems to go missing and the two are worried, Mami thinking it's her fault

This bit is weird, it seems to play out like film 1 but from Mami's point of view. Mabayu suddenly seems to not know her. (Kyubey is affected too)

Homura is coolTM so its not film 1 I guess. Homura tells Mami not to talk with Mabayu.

Mami thinks Mabayu erased her memories of their time together.

Kyoko tells Mami the truth about witches.

Mabayu meets up with Mami and sees her memories which brings her old ones back. She realises Mami is guilty about leading other girls to their deaths by making them contract. Mabayu thinks she's a coward for cutting her own memories but leaving Mami with the burden.

It is revealed Homura was trying to keep Mami and Mabayu apart so that Mabayu wouldn't regain her memories of Mami and the time they spent together. (I dont really know why...)

Mabayu uses future sight for Homura, saying they'll win and fix everything, but this is a lie. She actually saw herself becoming a witch.

As Mabayu is close to falling into despair, Madoka wishes to save her.

Then we go to film 0, I dont know why this is getting so hard to follow...

It seems like this is the first timeline, the start of episode 10.

Madoka makes a contract to save Amy.

Mabayu is friends with Mami here.

Meanwhile Mabayu meets Ultimate Madoka??? It seems she is showing Mabayu these events.

Mabayu helps Madoka with the minotaur witch.

Mabayu sees Walpurgisnacht while future-visioning for the minotaur witch and tells Mami and Madoka.

Episode 10 plays out

The girls defeat Charlotte with Mami surviving.

Walpurgisnacht comes and Mabayu uses her future vision but sees they will fail and both Mabayu and Mami will become witches.

Mabayu lies, saying they'll defeat the witch.

At Walpurgisnacht, Mabayu confesses she lied before and she suddenly sees numerous films of the anime.

Mabayu says something dumb and cuts her own memories "Her future vision shows her a film with a future in which her vision of the future is already woven in. So if she erases her memories of despair, then the future will turn into hope!" like what the fuck does that mean? But Mami knew she was lying anyway cause she's a terrible liar so Mabayu you fucking solved nothing

Mami and Mabayu both die by Walpurgisnacht and Homura contracts.

Mabayu awakes in a new timeline and goes to cut Kyubey and Mami's memories of her.

And now we're FINALLY back to the main story

Mabayu cuts the film of her fate(?) I guess making it so she forgets about witches.

Madoka, Homura, Kyoko and Mabayu go to find Mami in the school where she's laid out a trap. She wants to 'free Mabayu of Homura's brainwashing' and wants to run away with her.

Mami doesn't want her memories to be cut because she doesn't want to stop being Mabayu's friend but in the end she accepts it, Mabayu cutting her memories.

They fight Walpurgis but fail, reset!

Film 13

Mami no longer comes up to Mabayu in the morning, she no longer remembers her as a friend.

Mabayu decides to cut Homura's memories of her and then from the entire film(?) I guess from everyone else.

At the cafe, Mami visits to buy cake and gets along with Mabayu.

The anime then plays out like usual.

And well that's it :T what a lame ending huh. Can you tell I was super fed up at the end? But... the story is here... sorry if things don't make sense in places, they don't make sense just as much in the story...

#madoka magica #puella magi madoka magica #pmmm #magia record #scene zero

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sanigopiece · 2 years

Text

why uta is a well-written character

reposted from twitter since i saw uta get a lot of hate on there. a lot of people seem to not get her character so i am writing this post in hopes of getting people to see the light. anyways here we go,

1. her motivations are well supported by her backstory. it all began in the tragedy in elegia years prior where shanks took the blame for the destruction of the city and left uta in the care of gordon. this led uta to being forced into a life of loneliness and isolation for the rest of her growing up years.

these feelings accumulate while she studies music until she eventually finds a den den mushi to livestream her performance. here she learns of the harshness of pirates in the outside world and coupled with her resentment towards the red haired pirates for leaving her motivates her to revisit her old dream of starting a new genesis. this is a solid way of story cohesion between uta's backstory and her actions in the present. everything ties in very nicely & its easy to understand & empathize with.

2) i've seen some complain about how uta saying that she knew all along that she had caused the destruction of elegia & called it bad writing. this was actually her way of coping with the years of isolation but also her grief in shanks leaving her.

i speculate that uta realized she caused the destruction of elegia when she learned about tot musica and when faced with this, she chooses to find someone else to blame because guilt ate away at her so she chose to continue believing the lie that shanks did it. so it isnt bad writing because we are given more context on her mental state at the time and it is meant to be a gateway for viewers to empathize with her more but i guess people missed that.

3. she is not entirely evil. yes she is a villain because she believes she is doing whats right in order to achieve her goal however she still has goodness in her heart. she could've easily kept people trapped in the song world after tot musica was defeated.

but she didnt because she realized that what she did was wrong and she changed for the better. yes there's moments in the film where she does upsetting things like tearing shanks's hat but these were done in her mentally unstable state so it is unfair to entirely fault her for her actions. she is merely a misguided and misunderstood lonely girl with a dream so dont be so hard on her. she is good deep down.

4. her character is unique. already a given since we dont have that many music centric characters except maybe brook but even brook's powers aren't linked to music so uta is really special. also her songs carry so much meaning and not only does it set the mood for most scenes but it also adds to the story. i highly recommend checking out the lyrics of each uta song because they really tie in to the events of the story and you might just enjoy her character more.

5. her canonity adds more flare to the story. oda recently confirmed uta to be canon and this means a lot to both shanks and luffy's backstory. it does not detract from their backstories but rather it gives more context like how we understand a lot more about luffy's dream and why he wants a musician in his crew thanks to uta.

as for shanks, he now has more reason of being and we also got some clues to his lineage in the movie. this is really nice since most shoe horned characters have issues when they're added to canon.

alright so thats all. its been quite the long thread but i love uta and i want more people to appreciate her instead of hating or mischaracterizing her. if i missed anything do let me know. thanks and have a nice day <3

#one piece #one piece film red #one piece film red spoilers #uta is well written #uta one piece #im tired of dudebros mischaracterizing uta #imagine hating uta wtf #for the fans of uta #i love uta so so much #shanks #luffy #elegia #UTA MY BELOVED

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spacexseven · 1 year

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to let a good deed go unpunished

NOTE: for the anime-only's, there may be a few spoilers about tecchou below, so please keep that in mind. i and Hopefully this isn't too ooc lol :< still waiting for more tecchou content ^^ i'm spelling his name as tecchou here, instead of tetchō :>

REQUEST: general y! tecchou headcanons from @shumidehiro

CW: yandere character, manipulation, unhealthy relationships, obsession, jealousy, stalking

- an encounter with tecchou is an opportunity that is hard to come by outside of his work, since he's more devoted to his duty of upholding justice more than anything

- that's not to say it's impossible. besides, as long as he recognizes you share the same values as him, you'd easily make an impression on him, even if you didn't plan to do so

- due to tecchou's nature, he easily focuses on things that pique his curiosity or admiration. he can spend hours watching you display your sense of justice or leadership (much like the ants he watched without moving)

- while tecchou can be either a platonic or romantic yandere, his overall intentions are the same. he wants to protect you from the cruel, imbalanced world he's used to. he knows your beliefs can change in a moment once you realize the true nature of people, and doesn't want that to happen

- tecchou doesn't like lying to you or deceiving you. he's an honest person by nature and hates using force or mind games to get you to do something. since he believes sincere discussion is the best way to ease tensions, arguments with tecchou never get out of hand - most of the time he's not able to pick up on what you're feeling, nor does he stop to consider how you're affected as a consequence of his actions. in fact, he's surprised to know that you actually feel more paranoid than safe because of his constant surveillance - because unfortunately, as you'll quickly realize, tecchou genuinely believes his actions are helping you. you may be upset at his rigid rules but he only wants to protect you - he thinks you don't understand that his actions come from a place of good intentions, so while he's ready to hear out your concerns, it's impossible to get him to change his ways when they're so rooted in his personal values, and so he'll keep justifying his own actions to you. - tecchou feels responsible for protecting you from the evil intent of anyone else. due to this, he indirectly restricts your social circle so that all your friends are all either in the hunting dogs or involved with them in some way

- tecchou doesn't ever toy with you or harm you. however, that's not to say he won't hurt others...

- he revels in his ability to make any potential target tremble in fear from just his glare. and even if they don't back down from that, he has an array of methods to silence anyone who dares come in his way

- while tecchou doesn't consider himself violent, he's willing to dirty his hands to protect you. but at first, he doesn't actually consider hiding it from you

- it's likely a hunting dog member (jouno) would be the one to advise him about keeping it a secret. jouno's the one who explains to him that even if he was protecting you from who he deemed as 'evildoers', you'd probably not appreciate the sentiment

- in fact, you'd likely be horrified at the thought that tecchou would be so cruel as to harm someone who only wanted to talk to you. you could only justify tecchou's actions if you believed he was only truly apprehending criminals, which is ultimately why he makes sure you never catch him hurting someone else

- he doesn't want you to lose your trust in him, which is why kidnapping and imprisonment are also not in tecchou's plans; not unless he absolutely has no other choice. he fights off the evil from your shadow, and ensures that you are none the wiser

(softer hcs below that i felt didnt match with the rest)

- tecchou's not used to physical affection, but will quickly adapt to your preference. since he's physically a lot stronger than a regular person due to his modifications, it'll take him a while to figure out if he's holding you too tight or if he's hurting you

- he'll be happy if you want to join him while he's working out. whether you want to help out, watch or try working out alongside him, he'll appreciate the company

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crystallizsch · 3 days

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And here I am bringing yet another song that reminds me of ur ocs sigh... Well, kinda, more like a relationship your oc has with someone 😭

I do not want to force u to ship Yuuna and Riddle, let me just get this out of the way😔 In fact if you wanna use this you can use this was just Riddle's little unrequited love for Yuuna<3

Anyways enough😭 ok so one of my favorite singers, Laufey, released a song a while ago called Must be Love and it's just??? So Riddle?? Like it's very Riddle falling for Yuuna kinda thing...

Like especially these two parts... Yes it made me think of him because of the word "Wonderland" but listen!! It's so funny (and cute) to imagine people asking Riddle why he's so distracted and the reason being because he just can't help but be entranced by Yuuna🥺🥺 and the fact that he's so strict with himself and others and now he just acts so dumb and lovestruck because of them

ARHHHHGGG I HOPE IM MAKING SENSE

And then she rejects him😀 oh well

AARUGHH NOOO THAT'S SO CUTEEE

I GET YOU I GET WHAT YOU MEANNN

THE LYRICS ARE ALL SO RIDDLE

like any mild mention of yuuna or reminder of them would get him all unnecessarily flustered and defensive and he doesn't know why at first

and then he finally realizes "oh no" he like likes yuuna

You made a sappy stupid something out of me The kind I swore I'd never be

AUDSGHDSKJFLKD

ALSO SMALL TANGENT. THAT REMINDS ME OF THAT ONE SCENE IN BOOK 2 OF RIDDLE FIXING THE PREFECT'S TIE WHICH GOT ME INTO RIDOYUU IN THE FIRST PLACE

AND IT DIDNT HELP THAT THE MANGA ALSO MADE IT SO CUTE

(YUUNA DOESNT HAVE A TIE AHHH SO HE'S FIXING THEIR COLLAR INSTEAD)

RIDOYUU IS REAL (i am delusional)

okay anywaysss i kind of. did a small comic (+ some extra ramblings) of the confession under the cut ----

i’m still debating on whether i want riddle to already know hes gonna be rejected bc of a reality check from ace/deuce/grim

or if i want him to find out all by himself

because with the first one it’s a slow buildup and dread knowing the answer and when he finally receives the confirmation, riddle allows his heart to 100% break and finally come to terms that there isn’t going to be that kind of reciprocation from yuuna

for the LATTER, I want it to be like he mistook their friendliness as them undoubtedly having the same feelings, like he’s so certain about it. "they're acting this way towards me, so why not?? they'll give me a chance. I'll just make the first move" but he's still nervous, of course, but when he got rejected, it completely upended him because all of what he thought he had misinterpreted. of course he wouldn't blame yuuna for it, he would be more upset with himself for not being able to get it right and assuming in the first place

but EITHER WAY it's good good yummy angst

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kkbardd · 10 months

Text

so uhh i got summoned to asurei court, if anyone's interested in my testimony papers, theyre down below the cut. (aka my whole take on how i believe their dynamic would develop in cannon)

asurei isn’t for everyone & its whole point is unhealthy dependence.. toxic yuri if u will.. anything resembling a healthy relationship would only be in one of the alt universes created by the 3rd impact 💀 rei and asuka both have what the other wants (whether it be the worth asuka puts on recognition of piloting skills or rei's desire to break from mindless obedience like asuka seems to do so easily.) They both hate and admire each other for this, and asuka specifically expresses this by lashing out at rei. asuka's whole relationship w lesbian comphet plays a HUGE role into all of this but let’s gloss over it for the time being. (now, with asurei u gotta get a bit delusional cuz cannon doesn’t give us much so from here on out is just my opinion on how it'd play out.)

in terms of rei's POV in this:

rei hates the attention they gets from men, and is especially disgusted by gendo's fake kindness. he sees rei as a replaceable doll and pushes yui's image on them. gendo has never actually seen rei for who they really are, and rei later begins to hate and despise not only gendo but themselves too. in the anime, rei is shown to have self destructive tendencies & suicidal ideation because not only are they constantly being replaced & having their memory wiped, but each time they forget any sort of emotion that they learn in the meantime. recall the scene in which rei, right after being "revived" and left with no memory, sees gendo's glasses. although they cant remember anything, its hinted that their "soul" still remembers and hates him. rei tries to break the glasses but in the end, they’re still unable to defy and break free from their situation. feeling frustrated and helpless, rei starts crying & remarks how this should be the first time they've experienced it but somehow it feels like its not. back to the present, reis acting very reckless in battle and basically using themselves as a meat shield. they're so full of self-hate, and seeing asuka's obvious inferiority to them just upsets them even more. why does she put so much worth on the one thing that acts like a plague to them? compared to these pointless test results on a screen, asuka has something so much more valuable. the ability to think for themselves, to not be someone's doll. asuka's inferiority is almost insulting. rei verbally lashes out at asuka in the elevator, showing defiance that they never knew they could produce. it felt almost liberating. they find that being around asuka gives them emotions that they've always longed for, no matter how ugly they may be. they soon find themselves seeking asuka out, and the inferiority that was once insulting became a means to control and keep her close. asuka, someone who was seemingly invincible and can roam free without care, has one weakness that causes her to crack and shatter from the slightest touch. and that weakness is none other than rei themselves. rei becomes possessive in a way that they've never known possible. so much so that a part of them starts to hate themselves, fearing they've become just like their abuser gendo. nonetheless, rei begins to value their life more. they become deathly afraid of dying & being replaced by some mindless clone that has forgotten everything they now know about asuka and themself.

now what is asuka doing in all of this?

asuka deals with a lot of comphet and its an integral part of her character, so much so that it doesn’t seem right to not mention it. but to quickly summarize, because of this she has a love-hate relationship with attention from men. she feels disgusted by it but gets extremely jealous when it seems like another girl might replace her. then comes rei. (now what most ppl don’t seem to notice is asuka didnt start off hating rei, she tried to be friends but ever since the beginning misato has ALWYAYS pitted them against each other. this of course led asuka to feeling threatened & seeing rei as an enemy. especially since it involves piloting ability, something that asuka sees as her whole point of living.) she begins to hate her because how can someone who is so good at piloting be so brainless and doll-like. that’s exactly what asuka was trying so hard to not become! in this aspect, rei's entire existence defies what asuka has tried so hard to believe in up to this point. her hate & inferiority towards rei is only made worse when she sees that they're not only being objectified by men, but are seemingly unbothered by it unlike asuka. rei is now constantly on her mind, and asuka starts to realize that what she's feeling towards them isn’t just hate. its around the time of the elevator scene that these confusing emotions and inferiorities are at their peak. right after this, asuka goes into battle & is ordered to be rei's backup. she defies this order but receives a mental attack from an angel that causes her to re-live all of her trauma & comphet issues. the person that saved her from this is none other than rei. at this point asuka is at an all-time low, and states that she'd rather be left for dead than saved by someone like rei. she’s still confused by her feelings towards rei, but right now her hatred and insecurity is taking priority. its right after this battle that her synchro rates plummet and she loses the #1 thing she based her life worth on. she then goes out to die in an abandoned building but is eventually retrieved by NERV. I believe that during this time alone, she’s also wallowing in her feelings for rei and coming to terms with a lot of comphet stuff, especially after that psychological attack. right after this the world like ends or whatever but lets forget that for now & extend time cuz the gays need it 🥰 .

rei and asuka at this point realize their feelings in one way or another, and there's a lot of tension in their conversations. asuka is at a very fragile point rn bc of all the stuff that just went on, and rei is unsure how to go about things, half due to their inexperience & half due to their fear of becoming like gendo. however, asuka realizes rei is acting different from before, and advances on them as a way of lashing out. but to her surprise rei is undefiant and actually willingly helpless in her hands. she feels a rush of superiority and is amused by how inexperienced rei is. she also realizes that unlike her previous experiences with men (like when she tried to kiss shinji but didnt want to see, smell, taste, or even feel it & had a mental breakdown afterwards lol ) she actually likes it!? the romantic/sexual affirmation that asuka has always wanted from men like kaji is being fulfilled by rei in a way that asuka feels completely in control & comfortable. she's not forcing herself or being objectified, but rather is taking the lead. this is something she never imagined possible before. and all of this is with rei to boot! the rei that, in asuka's eyes, has always looked down on her and been unobtainable is now melting in her hands like putty. there’s a sense of accomplishment she feels, which makes her want to push rei even more. she finally has authority and to make herself feel better, she takes it out on rei through advances like this. she goes further and further, and in an ironic way, uses intimacy as a form of self-harm. she feels shame and despises herself for doing such things with ill-intent, and with another woman at that. its a toxic relationship that tries to fill the hole in her heart, but only leads to a bigger one forming.

when asuka first advanced onto rei, they felt something unlike anything before. unlike when gendo would often touch their shoulder, rei didnt recoil from asuka's touch. rei also felt something similar to asuka, in that the person who always seemed unbound by anything in now giving them her undivided attention. the fact that this came from an act of anger didnt really bother rei, since they knew from the beginning that was one of the only ways to get asuka to even spare them a glance. rei would gladly become hated if it meant binding asuka to them. in a mix of touch-starvedness & unhealthy dependency on asuka, rei kept looking forward to any interacting with asuka, since it was what really made them feel alive. asuka slowly becomes rei's world and meaning for living, but they eventually realize that causes a great insecurity. asuka is independent and can go anywhere she wants if she feels like it. from rei's pov, asuka desperately wants attention from men, something that rei could never give her. rei's afraid that asuka will leave them, & to tie asuka down they play the role of a villain. rei keeps asuka feeling insecure by becoming what asuka envisioned them as, and slowly starts hacking away at asuka's Achille's heel. rei desperately uses the short time that asuka has given them to engrain themself into her, so much so that asuka would be nothing without them. rei cannot let asuka realize her worth for fear that she would leave them. rei notices that asuka enjoys seeing them helpless and plays the part, almost like a honeytrap. slowly tho I believe that rei starts to take control of the relationship in hopes of making asuka dependent on them.

Asurei is in no way a wholesome relationship, and ik that’s not for everyone.. my vision of a happy end for them would be both of them becoming comfortable in their relationship and finding that the actions they once used to express hatred for themselves and each other is now slowly becoming fueled by love and desire for each other. They form a very unhealthy co-dependence on each other, but for them it works. They cant envision a world without the other in it.

#asurei #i was so surprised i got summoned #am i seen as some kind of asurei-connoisseur #toxic yuri #thats all it boils down to

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puhpandas · 7 months

Text

Rough Night

(2,580 words)

Gregory and Vanessa both have scars from The Mimic. Mentally and physically. (Gregory was bait for trapping the mimic and has scars to show for it. Vanessa's scars are mentally, though)

The scar is nothing new, really. Three thick gashes cut cleanly through his calf, each coiling around his leg like a snake, only made six short months ago.

They had needed bait. They'd needed someone to lure the thing into their trap to shut the doors on it. They knew how smart it was. They knew it wouldnt be fooled so easily. No. They had to be smarter than it. They had to give it something to chase. They had to put one of the things it hates most right in front of it. They had to make it think only of the prey it could catch.

It was him, of course. Turns out, when you break free suddenly from somethings control, then proceed to free every other minion of its and leave it back at square one, that thing can develop a really bad grudge against you.

Gregory remembers now. He didnt back then. He remembers how he was its favorite, once upon a time. It had selected him like it had selected Vanessa.

Thinking back, maybe that's why Vanessa insisted he was the better choice for bait. Maybe the thing felt betrayed in a way. Maybe its angry that its former favorite had been its downfall. He doesnt know.

It doesnt matter, anymore. Shutting down useless thoughts is apart of what hes learned at the therapy he and Vanesss have started together. The thing is trapped now. It doesnt matter to him.

It's hard to not reminisce, though. Not when those same three long lines sliced jaggedly through his leg were from the things claws. When it got him at the last second in the vent.

Not when those same lines running all the way up his calf and then some flare up in the night. Not when it didnt heal properly. Not when it still hurts him.

Like the scar, the pain is nothing new. It's not the first time its woken him up in the night. Usually, he bites it down until he falls back asleep.

This time is bad, though. It's not as easily ignored. Usually, if he lays still, the pain will fade long enough to drift back off.

This time, though, it sends stabbing pain up his leg that causes him to twitch and shift, and the burning never ceases. He bites his tongue, frustration palpable in the groan he let's out.

Stupid, stupid robot. Stupid claws. Stupid vent. He usually doesn't get this upset, but this night is a bad night, apparently. His leg is so irritated it's impossible to ignore, and no matter how much he tries to lay still in bed and clear his thoughts, the knowledge that theres scar gel in a drawer in the kitchen bought specifically for nights like these linger in his minds eye.

He groans one more time when his annoyance doesnt cause the pain to magically wash away, and he throws the covers off of his body, hissing when the movement irritates the scar tissue even more.

He bites it down, pushing through with furrowed brows. He just needs to make it to the kitchen, use the gel, sit for a little while, and then hopefully go back to sleep.

He never bothers Vanessa with things like this. Shes sleep deprived enough as it is. Gregory has the mercy of not remembering everything. The things he does being not so vivid.

Vanessa doesnt get that. The memories plague her the worst at night. As clear a day. Shes always telling him how glad she is that he doesnt have to deal with them like she does.

Gregory thinks it's kinda funny. How Vanessa got the mental scars and Gregory got the physical ones. The thin, jagged slice on his cheek never went away, either. It's still there. A permanent reminder of that night.

A permanent reminder that they killed him. Gregory reminds himself. A permanent reminder that hes gone. Like how my leg is like a symbol of how that thing is trapped forever now.

Gregory and Vanessa are victims, sure. But they're also survivors. They won the battle. They won the war. And they have the marks to show for it.

He tiptoes past Freddys slumped, charging, patchwork body with practiced precision. The feeling of sneaking past an animatronic is all too familiar. He turns the knob of the door of his room gently, mindful of where it creaks, and swings it open.

He makes it to the kitchen easily, after that. Being quiet in the silence comes naturally when he pulls open the drawer he knows they keep it in, grabbing the tube as soon as it's in sight.

He avoids all of the floorboards that creak when he makes his way to the couch in their small living room, sending a look to the door of Vanessa's room when he sits down.

He sighs. He'll be quiet. He doesnt want Vanessa to wake up.

He doesnt want to bother her. She has her own demons. He wants her to rest as much as shes able.

He doesnt want to add on to the reasons shes so exhausted every day.

Vanessa knows exactly what kind of night this is when she filters back into conciousness slowly. When she becomes aware or her body, her joints are sore and her mouth is as dry as a desert.

Shes warm, tucked safely into bed, and plenty tired. Usually, all of these factors lead to a great nights sleep.

Not for her, though. Her rough nights are nothing new, really. When she'd first gotten back, freshly freed, only ten short months ago, sleep had been scarce. Every time shed try, flashes of what she'd been forced to do those two years would play behind her eyelids like a slideshow.

That only happens half the time, now. An improvement, sure, but a good night's sleep is still rare for her.

She doesnt even try to fall back asleep. She knows she won't be able to. Better to stop the memories before they arrive by busying herself. Shes used to being tired, anyway.

Its nothing new, really, when she peels herself off of her covers and stumbles her way through her pitch black room to her door. She'll sit in the living room. Watch a movie, maybe. Get a snack. It's what she usually does on her bad nights.

Shes halfway through a silent, jaw creaking yawn when she catches sight of the couch already being occupied, and the TV already on.

She only stands there and stares for a moment, but she understands quickly. She sighs sadly, resigned.

I guess we both had a rough night. Vanessa thinks when she catches sight of Gregory's scar gel on the coffee table.

She makes herself known silently, inching into Gregory's line of sight so he'll notice her himself. He still startles when she catches him unexpectedly, but she doesn't apologize. She knows him. She knows he doesnt like acknowledging it.

He huffs out a sigh, seemingly coming to the former conclusion she just did moments ago. He shimmies down the couch, making room for her in the little nest of blankets hes created on the couch.

She sits down without a word. She knows, and she knows that he knows, and she knows that he knows that she knows. Theres no point in voicing it.

She always finds comfort in the silence, anyway. It's nice. Knowing that somebody gets you enough to not need words. Before, shed always needed to confirm. To deny. To explain. To answer.

She doesn't need to do that, with Gregory. Something about being in the same boat helps her understand. It helps them understand eachother.

She digs into the open box of Cheez-Its Gregory has propped up on his leg, crunching down on a handful. She gazes up at the TV, her eyes burning from the light that shines as bright as a beacon, but she ignores it easily. Gregory's put on some sort of YouTube video about customizing an animatronic.

She huffs in amusement, shimmying to get comfortable. She was already planning on distracting herself with the TV, why not do it with a buddy?

Its silent, for a while. A comfortable silence. Shes glad that she can find contentment with Gregory with little words, even in their predicaments. The TV is the only thing keeping the apartment from being so silent you could hear a pin drop.

Every once in a while, Gregory's leg twitches, and she has to fight to not glance over. It's not good for her. She knows. It's why Gregory wears pants instead of shorts now. Every time she sees those three deep tunnel-like scars in Gregory's leg, all she can think about is how much it shouldn't have been him.

She doesnt know how to explain to him that she was scared. That she couldn't make herself do it. That she took advantage of how sure of himself and confident Gregory had been. How she let herself be weak and put him into the fray. How he had gotten hurt because of it.

Because of her.

It's only now that she realizes that shes failed in not falling into that hole she does every time she gets a look at those scars. They're like the opposite of Gregory's face scar. While the scar on his face represents how she succeeded, how he succeeded, how he freed her, how he stopped the long line of killings, all the scars on his leg remind her of is how she failed. How she failed to protect him. How she failed to take care of him. Of possibly the only family shes ever had.

Gregory notices. He always does. Even though on the outside, all that's changed is the wetness to Vanessa's eyes and the clench in her jaw.

He looks at her. Silently, she knows it's an invitation. It's a request.

She forces herself to look back. Even though her skin crawls. Even when her stomach churns with guilt. Even when she almost cant even stand to see the scar on his face that she associates with hope so often.

He conveys so much to her in one look when she meets his eyes. Like a silent conversation. Its not your fault He says. I dont blame you, so dont blame yourself.

It is, though. She conveys back, hands shaking. You should. Everyone should. I should have been stronger. I should have been better.

He doesnt say anything else. He just turns his attention back to the TV, grabbing her hand with his own and squeezing it enough to let her know he isn't letting go.

A disagreement. Is what Vanessa realizes this is. No, you're wrong. Hes saying. You're healing. We both are.

She takes another glance at the scar gel on the coffee table, and sighs out, relenting. Theyve had this conversation a million times. Enough for it to be second nature to reassure eachother.

Vanessa thinks shes like Gregory, in a way. His scars have healed, supposedly, but they haven't really. They still flare up. They still hurt. They still stand for something. They still are a mark of something that will never disappear. Not fully.

But its manageable. His scars have become less of a gaping hole and more of a reminder there once was one. It can be pushed to the back of his mind, a lot of the time. Sometimes, it's a minor inconvenience. Sometimes, like tonight, it flares back up. An old pain.

But that's what hes become to them, isnt he? A minor inconvenience. He no longer affects them day to day like he did before. He no longer hovers over them, ever present. He no longer has that affect on them he did before.

He became a distant memory. Something theyve learned to manage as something apart of their lives. Of theirs. They survived him. They have the marks to show for it. Theyve outlived him, and so have the wounds hes created.

Sometimes, on nights like these, it's hard to remind herself of how far theyve come. But they have. Theyve built a little life for themselves. With their hobbies and responsibilities and little family theyve made of themselves. It's a country mile compared to what Vanessa had thought only ten short months ago. When she couldnt imagine a life a week from then.

It's like shes heard Gregory say before; they survived, and they have the marks to show for it. A night or two or three spent on the couch at 4am because of a rough nights sleep, or old pain flaring up is nothing in the grand scheme of things.

Because she can hear Gregory snort at something funny the people on screen said, and she smiles herself just at the sound, and they're alright. Theyve carved a hole, jagged as can be, where he used to be in their lives, but they're working on filling it. No matter how patchwork it may be.

She wouldnt change her little family and her little life for the world, she decides. Her hand twitches in Gregory's own, and when she remembers she even has ahold of it, she squeezes.

"How about we treat ourselves to some ice cream?" Its the first thing Vanessa's said to Gregory all night, and he lights up like a Christmas tree quicker than Vanessa can even get up off the couch.

She gives him a look that says Stay down. Your leg hurts tonight., and he does. If not wiggling a bit.

"I want the big spoon. Kay?"

Vanessa chuckles, grabbing the carton straight out of the freezer and making sure to pick the appropriate utensil. "Alright. But I get to pick the next video, kay?"

Gregory nods, snatching the spoon straight from her hands. "Okay, room service. Just hurry up and sit down already."

Vanessa rolls her eyes, muttering "I could use the extra pay..."

"Yeah, sure. You're poor. Whatever. Can we watch the Sims?"

Vanessa's scoffs. Sitting back down on the couch and draping the shared throw blanket across her legs. "I get to pick the video, remember, pipsqueak? And pass the ice cream."

Gregory grumbles, setting the large carton in between their knees and getting a huge spoonful when Vanessa snatches the remote.

But despite her comments, she scrolls down to a recent search and puts on one of their favorite series of the Sims, shimmying to get comfortable.

She doesnt miss the way Gregory looks suprised, but neither acknowledge it. They just sit, content, smiles on their faces, stuffing their faces with ice cream.

The sun rises, eventually, and the tiredness feels more bearable when the birds are chirping faintly and the blue sky begins to peek through the blinds.

Its nights like these where she really becomes aware of how much theyve healed. Of how much he has been reduced to nothing but a phantom pain. A lingering inconvenience. Something ignoreable.

They defeated him. It continues to suprise her. Day after day. But they did.

They defeated him, and now, they'll outlive him.

And so will this little family theyve made for themselves.

Freddy eventually joins them in the living room, looking panicked. She and Gregory share a look. They both understand.

Okay, so maybe they still have some healing to do. That's apparent when Freddy tucks himself tightly on Gregory's other side after sitting down. But the idea feels a little easier with her family beside her.

ao3 link

#can you tell im obsessed with the fact that gregorys backpack is left abandoned and unzipped right by the vent leading to the mimic.#almost like it had been left in a hurry. the implications.#i got too carried away with what could come from the mimic scar with gregory and this happened #pandas writes #3 star fam #gregory and vanessa #ggy #dr rabbit #gregory #vanessa #oneshot #my fics

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bridgyrose · 2 months

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Ruby and Jaune used to be a couple. They put it on hold after the fall of Beacon, but the love had passed long after, especially after Penny's death and the Ever After. They reflect on it in Vacuo, where they're still uncomfortable being near each other.

(This was a fun idea to run with)

Ruby walked along the border of the city of Vacuo, eyes focused on the horizon in front of her so she could try to take her mind off the fact that she was paired up with Jaune. Again. The reminders of what had been lingering in the back of her mind every time she saw him. All of it she wished she could forget.

“This… almost reminds me of the hikes we’d take around the forest during the semester break,” Jaune said as he followed behind Ruby. “Just the two of us.”

Ruby gave a small nod as she grimaced a bit at the memory. “Can we… not talk about this right now?”

“And just forget about what we were?”

“Yes!” Ruby spat out as she turned towards him, a single tear running down her cheek as she tried to push back the memories from Beacon. “Do you really want to get back together after everything we’ve been through? You lived a long life without me and I’ve seen how uncomfortable you’ve been around me.”

“Y-yeah, but I…” Jaune let out a soft sigh. “We… we were never going to work out, were we?”

Ruby shrugged and sat down on a rock as she watched the sunset. “I… I dont know… we might have but… I’m not sure I-”

“Loved me? I… I think I know what you mean.”

“You do?”

Jaune nodded. “I saw the way you looked at Penny when we saw her again.”

Ruby glanced over at Jaune, and then back to the sunset as the sun started to drop below the horizon. She took a deep breath as she listened to Penny’s voice run through her head over and over again. “I-it wasnt like that… I-I saw her as a close friend, you know? Nothing more than that.”

“It seemed like more than that in the Ever After.”

“Like how you were after Pyrrha died?”

“She was my partner!” Jauned snapped. “Of course I was upset. She pushed me away when I could’ve helped her. She didnt have to die alone.”

“And this is exactly why we had to put our relationship on hold.” Ruby shivered a bit as the air started to get cold once the sun had disappeared. “You… you always seemed to care more about her than you did me.”

“Ruby-”

“You almost got yourself killed in Haven.”

“And you almost died in Argus. And then again in Atlas.”

“That was different.”

“Not, it wasnt.”

Ruby took a breath to try to calm herself and looked up at the shattered moon. “When… when did we stop loving each other.”

“I… I think after we went to Atlas. Or… or after we split up before Argus.” Jaune sighed and leaned back a bit. “I dont know. We’ve been through so much over these last few months and we’ve changed. I grew up, you died… I dont think we could ever go back to how we were.”

Ruby pulled her cloak around herself to keep herself warm as she watched the horizon and listened to Jaune. He made it sound so easy to figure it all out, but the more she thought about it, the less certain she was that she had ever even loved him to start with. Meeting him was a breath of fresh air, and spending weeks with him and going on dates were great and she had loved them. But after meeting Penny, getting caught up in fighting Roman, Beacon falling, losing a few friends… it was almost as if love was never there.

She stood up as she saw movement on the horizon, another mob of grimm had been heading towards the city. Her eyes practically reflected the moonlight as she grabbed her scythe. “Go get the others.”

“I’ll call them-”

“Just go!” Ruby took a breath as she watched Jaune run off out of the corner of her eye. Her mind raced as she tried to calm herself, focusing on the ones she loved. A tear rolled down her cheek as the memories of friends she had lost ran through her mind, her memories stopping on Jaune and the last date she had with him the night before the Vytal Festival. As the grimm started to get closer, she watched in determination as her eyes started to glow. She didnt care if she didnt love Jaune anymore, but she refused to lose anyone else.

#rwby #ruby rose #rwby ruby rose #jaune arc #lancaster #ruby x jaune #angsty drabbles #well I guess this is a past jaune x ruby au #a love that didnt work out

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 5 months

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Am I the asshole for ditching helping my friends on a school project to hang out with someone else? I know this sounds bad.

So my friends are all in an english class im not in and they have a big final project due where they have to make a movie based on the hero's journey or whatever, and I agreed to play one of the roles. I haven't had this agreement long bc they werent originally allowed to let me participate because im not in the class, but the teacher agreed. I also only have a small role that would be two or three scenes at the very beginning and very end.

Everyones had a hellish time trying to schedule together, and theres not a huge amount of time left for the project. Monday was off this week because no one was prepared, thursday and tuesday were off cause two of the people had other school stuff, but that leaves wednesday, friday, the whole weekend and monday as well.

The thing is, everyone was planning on filming on wednesday to get it done as soon as possible- but I agreed to hang out with a different friend wednesday (ill call him Z). Z and i are besties and would spend hours talking every day last year, but since he graduated and has college he's been scary busy, and we've barely been able to hang out at all. We've been trying to schedule a meetup for weeks and finally got free time matching up wednesday, which was prettymuch planned before my friends gave me a role in their project.

I'm not the only person who cant film wednesday, another friend will be gone, and they said thats fine and they'l just film his scenes another day. They seemed really stressed and upset that i couldnt make it, though, but I dont understand why we cant just film mine & his scenes friday or the weekend.

It feels weird too because they're okay with him being gone because he had plans with his girlfriend, but i just have mine with a friend. Many of them know and love Z too and have barely gotten to see Z either so I thought they'd understand. I know I said I could be in the project while still having plans with a friend, but the plans are only one day. & i didnt know everyone elses schedules were so tight too. It's also not my class & this project isnt gonna affect my grade, so I'm not taking it as seriously as a lot of my friends- but the friend seeing his girlfriend is also not part of their class and it wont affect his grade either. I feel like im really disappointing them all but im not gonna pass up hanging out with Z after months of not seeing him in person.

aita ??

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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mihai-florescu · 28 days

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i think i feel pretty similar to you in that the world is terrible, depressing, it sucks. that’s it’s natural state and we will always return there. but i thank that even though it hurts there are ideals unhampered by reality, stories we can create where that cycle ends for a moment in a happier direction. it isnt our job or duty as there isnt any grand purpose like that, but there is an opportunity out there to create a story with our lives. whether it’s a well known story or lost by the wayside, those who acknowledge the layer beneath the cheery “reality” that is peddled can be writers of their own. i might be delusional and there really is no hope but i hope to create stories for people to enjoy that elusive dream in if only for a temporary respite and cant give up until i well and truly fail. i don’t know if any of my thoughts speak to you in any meaningful way, but i felt compelled to share as while i think we share beliefs we seem to have come to rather different conclusions. i want to give my life to a story, an art, that will hold ideals the real world can never truly embody and thus cannot really give up as every taste of the real reality only strengthens my resolve. is there something like that for you? i’ve read your blog for a while and in my mind (which is an inexperienced mind so I apologize for sharing its fallible perceptions) you seemed like a fascinating person who holds ideals the world refuses to embody and is slowly sinking under that weight. i know it’s not really my place, so i apologize for my audacity, but i believe that you are the sort of person who can create a true happiness for yourself eventually. well, i mean i kind of have to if i believe that for myself. i have more to say, but it seems this is become a ridiculously long message. i apologize, my words likely have crossed between ideas and lost sense at times. i hope they help, or at least don’t harm. i hope you find loveliness loveliness in your day as you deserve it.

I've been journaling about this yesterday... my entire outlook on life i guess? I know i used to be creative and make projects that i found fun, but i cant find this drive in me anymore, i'm more than ready to give up (if only upset at the way it ended so im pressuring myself to make a good Last Project, but nothing is good anymore. It's all so...plain. useless. banal. there's no wit or multilayer to anything i can come up with anymore. I cant develop an idea anymore. There are enough stories, enough artworks, plenty of them bad, theres no need for me to add to it). Im sure it's just burnout stacked on top of depression and general worsening misanthropy and paranoia, but i don't think i will ever feel more hopeful again.

However i do think art, literature, games, even just stories from other people are keeping me grounded. They're also humanity's only redeeming quality - imagination will save our souls... but my position isn't to be an artist anymore, i cant spare the energy and i dont see a point in it either. I cant do a single basic living thing anymore that others seem to be able to do? I very much feel like an npc trying to do my most necessary tasks as best i can, failing more often than not. I hate getting asked what i'll do on a day off (it used to be often at my internship. I dont even want to imagine what they thought about me, that's another can of worms that still haunts me and contributed to why i became like this). The answer is quite literally Pretend I Dont Exist. I will not do anything. I cant do anything. I stop existing the second you stop seeing me, im just in bed dreading the next time i have to be human. I think when other people say they didnt do anything it's a hyperbole, but i can go weeks, and i have gone months even, without leaving the house, if i wasnt expected to.

Part of me wants to think, hope, i could maybe even get interested in making things again if there was no expectation for me to be a person for a few years, completely disappear off the grid (the expectation to be a person that just doesnt come natural to me anymore... and a specific one at that - achieving goals and moving forward, working, with ambitions or any sort of drive, young and energetic, an only child with a good education earning a living... i despise the idea of making money. I despise consumerism too. I want to fund artists, family owned restaurants, bookshops, cafes, and i do, i spend so much money without realising, but i'm really worried i'll run out and not be able to make any to survive once im older and wont get funds from my parents anymore. So i try to save and fail... My family friends, same age or even younger, are buying their own cars and apartments, successfully working multiple well paying jobs at the same time, with plans for the future...? Id like to know both how and why. How do you have the energy and why do you care. But even if they tell me the answers it doesnt change how i feel in my own life)

But this also has skewed my perception of other people... it connects to how i dont actually understand friendships anymore, im sure i mentioned it recently. Like with being an artist, there was a time i did understand and had deep friendships, i think, but it's quite alien to me now? In the way im not real until i have to interact with someone else, and even then, debatable, theyre not real to me either. Like i know this isnt a good mindset to have but it's either everything is real and i genuinely believe we need to disappear, to put an end to this sad species soon, or nothing is real and everyone's just playing a role in a story i get to watch. In a way taking away people's humanity and making them characters in my head is out of kindness, im being delusionally optimistic and quite frankly parasocial even with "friends", but it keeps me floating, stable. Ish. Still kind of empty but entertained enough. But then actually having a conversation outside my head with them is scary, unpredictable... on good days that can be fun too. My roommate always says i end up on side quests a lot if i leave the house, i think im just open to witnessing new stories... just on good, no, great days though, i cant stress that part enough. Great days are getting rarer and rarer. Most days pass by while im in bed and in my head trying to process anything, where i can barely have a coherent thought, and i wait for the day to end. Today was good for example but i still didnt manage to do anything to earn me the title of person, yet it was good because i 1. Ate, and 2. Didnt cry.

The part of your ask that hit me the most was when you said i seemed like a fascinating person, past tense. Im sure i was, but nowadays im very little even a person. Cant be helped. I hope i managed to explain how and why. If you ever want to share your art, my dms are open, i can maybe tell you about my gallery of failure wips i cant stand to look at anymore. I saw the followup ask with your personal info but im not quite sure what else to say... even this ask took too long to answer and now i need a nappp

#ask #anon #long post

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seaweedbrain3 · 2 months

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i had to get on my laptop for this because i didnt know if i was gonna get a little upset and start angry typing cus angry typing is uncomftorable on my phone BUT ANYWAY ENOUGH WAFFLING

i dont like how unreasonably joshua is, i dont care if you dont like him for like no good reason cus i hate characters for no reason but THE REASONS PEOPLE HATE HIM ARE NOT ACTUALLY GOOD!! i think im very upset about this because when i read over the transcripts with him i relate to him on some level, like his alpha male thing is just him using metaphors to help explain his points which is how i see it, and people think its weird or him being some alpha man, which he isnt, he was explaining how he doesnt want to be replaced just in a way that makes him seem like some alpha male, and it alos angers me how in that session he wasnt being taken very seriously, is his way of explaining things weird?? yea it kinda is but thats not excuse to not take him seriously or dislike him, he had a valid reason to be upset, and yea his solutions were not good at all, but tbh if i were him i would also want juniper out of the cabin, and by the end he understood that his solutions weren't good and he just came to terms that juniper will just be there for one more day, he also showed genuine concern for what it being taught to the kids, he wants them to learn life lessons and be responsible, not little shit stains who run around with no remorse for anyone, which isnt bad at all, he wants the kids to be good people when they grow up, does it cause him to be a little up tight?? yea, but theres always that one person everywhere, wether it be school or camp or again everywhere, persnally if i was there i would understand him completly, hes also like me in the sense that he cannot express his feelings well, so he tends to make up excuses to avoid actually stating his feelings, yea sure its annoying but its not something to hate someone for, also that whole mediation session is just joshua explaining how hes upset that his routine was broken and how it got taken over and he was replaced, which i would be upset over too, and what is this a trait of?? both adhd and autism, which goes into my point that joshua is neurodivergent, is that one of the only traits i found?? yea, and why is he still neurodivergent?? because hes literally me, (please do not take my word for it, i just see a few neurodivergent traits in a character that fit me and i make them neurodivergent) i also think sydney's hateful attidute towards joshua made some people feel the same which goes into my previous argument that i said in a past post about how syd is an unreliable narrator, and also, his reasons like the life lessons thing and stuff they may hjave been excuses but they're still reasons, and his main thing was being jeaslous but HE STILL HAD SOME GOOD POINTS

please take this post with a grain of salt, im very bad at explaining things and i dont know if i explained everything the way i wanted to, i might reedit it at a further date when i actually find the words to explain everything correctly and i might be wrong about some things so again TAKE IT WITH A GRAIN OF SALT

(also i swear tumblr hates me cus i've been posting shit for a while and after many hours they still have 0 notes)

#camp here and there #chnt #joshua #joshua macheath #LEAVE HIM ALONE HE DID NOTHING WRONG

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clockworkcheetah · 9 months

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not me coming here with an analysis on the 2x07 brotzly arguement that nobody wants. this kinda fell into me going and aNOTHER THING, but i'll try and keep it vaguely coherent

also these are just interpretations/theorising- they're just ideas to chew on. obviously i'm coming to todds defense a little bit here (lbr he gets the most flack for a scene where i dont think anyones to blame) and at the end of the day its just a bit of fun innit

firstly and the main take here:

dirk did not want to be comforted right then and there. sounds a little odd, right? when you're upset you expect someone to hug you and tell you everything's fine. well... not always. especially when you're angry. especially when you're someone who needs time to process everything. he didn't want to be touched- throughout s2 he flinches away from todd (2x03) and he often uses something to shield himself- a cushion/the filing cabinet (2x03 and 2x04). he also distances himself from everyone when obviously upset. aka he wants space. the point is, todd picked up on that. he isnt gonna try and give dirk a comfort hug because how well would that go down, really? also i will point out in that scene todd never does try and touch dirk- when he notices dirk's upset, he kneels down close and speaks softly, but doesn't go further. it's similar to other times- close, but doesn't touch- dirk actually puts the distance between them. compared to how beast is with dirk, how BW treats dirk too, and how miserable he is the entire time with unwanted touching.

what todd normally does- and what seems to have worked before, is words of encouragement- they inspire him! except... he didnt want todd's words of encouragement or pep talks this time. at that point they would be just empty words, completely meaningless. he very clearly wasn't in the state of mind where any of that would've helped to me, i think dirk just really needed to vent and rage and eventually cool off and be in a better enough mental state to actually talk it through. but it's entirely possible even then he wouldn't wanna talk to todd- he clearly has a lot of self-blame to what has happened to him, even if todd doesnt blame him for that. and thats not todd's fault for not knowing that (todd not knowing will come up alot). hes not a mind reader, he has other priorities, and todd's own mental state isn't exactly great in s2, either. (another reason that occured to me why dirk might not talk to todd even afer he had time to process is the simple fact that todd was there. he spoke to francis and beast about the events of either the spring or cardenas case. hell! he even unloaded onto hobbs within knowing him a few hours. yet with todd, he doesn't... he could've told todd about the timeloop, the spring case, ect, but he knew todd was going to be there. maybe i'm reaching but its interesting- and falls back onto dirk keeps todd at arm's length (this will also come up alot). might make another post on that specifically)

so lets talk about todd now. a lot of flack he gets is that he shouldn't have left dirk, his words were harsh and his frustration came out of nowhere

i've already dived into the leaving thing (although he didn't abandon dirk. i kind of hate that narrative- he didn't tie dirk to a tree in the middle of the woods and drive off) dirk didn't want to go, wasn't in the state of mind to go and todd had a motivation to go. todd didnt force dirk to come with- even though he very much wanted him to- and dirk didn't force todd to stay. (and amanda at this point was still his main priority- was this a good priority? no! his arc was learning to let her go. dirk wasn't todd's main focus throughout s2 and this isn't a revelation. dirk still mattered- todd didn't stop caring for dirk just because he went off on his own.) and yes maybe he should've indicated he was coming back more clearly, because like todd, dirk isn't a mind reader either (but i'll come back to the communication thing)

todd's words were harsh. they were, i'm not pretending they weren't and they're supposed to be, because the brotzmans tend to be harsh when angry. i'm not justifying, but i can think of reasons: 1. self-projection. pretty much all of todd's really angry moments (directed at patrick and dirk in 1x07 and also suzie in 2x10) you can tell he's talking about himself at the core of it. with 2x07, i'll admit this falls into fanon speculation, but this line: 'Friendship isn't just about someone being there for you. It about you being there for them too.' there's weight there. there's no way this was just said on a whim, imo. todd is friendless at the start of the show, and yeah his selfish choices fucked them all up- but i think people tried to be there for him, and he pushed them all away (and probably hates himself for that.) I don't think dirk's being selfish, but todd had a point in indicating people have been trying to help and dirk wasn't accepting it. from the audience's pov yeah, we know why. todd's pov? he's given speeches, coaxed dirk into talking to him, or to engage with the case (dirk's indicated plenty of times he's a detective and wants to do cases). he is trying in the friendship, but dirk keeps him at arms length. for todd this would eventually become frustrating. (once again, i'll come back to this) 2. the blackwing line. hoo boy. 'I'm sorry they didn't teach you that at Blackwing' like i said, i doubt this was suppose to be favourable to todd here. but, a thing to consider: he doesn't know how bad blackwing is. '"Blackwing," it's a defunct CIA program that's after Dirk.' (1x06) 'Well, they don't exactly let us just wander around the halls' (2x02) 'I was in a government prison for psychics.' (2x02) todd was def given a watered down version of BW. todd wouldn't have known dirk was small in there- he says he hasnt seen mona in 15 years, we dont know dirk's exact age, probably early-mid 30s, though. todd is likely imagining dirk to be late teens-early 20s- and no context to how long he was in there the first time. another thing is, dirk talks about BW in a particular way- with humour, he downplays the trauma, and plays up that ~he was in a psychic prison~ to impress people. so in todd's pov, BW almost sounds like a very strict school (like how teens describe school as a prison). of course dirk doesn't- and shouldn't- have to traumadump anything, but todd has a specific idea of BW that he's been holding to for two months with no corrections to it and no real context provided. to add to that, todd is woefully optimistic. all throughout s2 he was desperately holding onto hope for things to be what they were. at the end of s1 he seemed ok(ish) with letting amanda go, then he got her phonecall and he spiralled- to a near delusional degree, basically in denial with the idea things can never go back to what he wants- until amanda tells him that is reality. self-improvement isn't smooth and linear, so him reverting isn't too shocking nor is it ooc of him. he needed to be called out and he was.

his frustration came out of nowhere. no it didn't. won't lie i'm not entirely sure how to word this one without being really blunt, but it very much was building up, dirk wasn't making it easy. ultimately i think there was some compassion fatigue- he had been trying to motivate and encourage dirk throughout s2- this wasn't a one-off time, at some point it was going to wear thin. todd has finite patience- but he did try. not to mention, todd never got openly angry with dirk in that scene, he stays relatively calm. the only time the frustration really came out was at the end, when he realised dirk wasn't coming with. also the whole yet again, dirk keeping todd at a distance thing. eventually that distrust is also going to wear todd out.

next thing, priest. todd's not stupid i mean he is but sometimes he's smart he would've picked up that priest did something to dirk- nobody knows what specifically, but there's obviously something. the only info we get (from todd's pov) is:

'-that man, Mr. Priest, I've met him before, Todd. He kills people.'

couple things to take from this: - 'i've met him before' suggests they didn't interact all that often- it sounds like they met once and a lot can happen in one meeting, of course. could be dirk downplaying his trauma again, pretending priest wasn't his childhood monster, or that he's in denial that priest did something really bad to him. but we don't know! todd isn't going to know that either - the 'he kills people' line doesn't really hold much weight for todd. how many people does he know who kill people? quite a lot at this point. priest is just another guy on the long list of guys who kill people- he doesn't know much more than that.

something else i picked up on is this scene parallels quite well with 1x01. aka dirk givig a motivational speech and todd responds with: 'No. You know what, no, I don't want to hear all that from you right now.' whilst dirk never directly says he doesn't want to hear what todd had to say in 2x07, it certainly read like he didn't want to. maybe todd recognised that (the whole self-projection thing) and decided to back-off. yeah, he was bitchy about it, but giving breathing room isn't bad and honestly? seemed like the smartest move in the heat of the moment- the whole dirk wants space when upset. not too mention, todd 100% knew what dirk was doing- pushing people away, trying to make todd hate him- see him as a bad person who hurts people, because todd does the same thing. tbh that's probably why todd got bitchy with his response- he likely saw through it and the brotzmans when they sense shit aren't gonna be that soft in their replies

i think that's all the main things i noticed about that scene. but i have a few smaller ones that link back to previous points:

dirk is dismissive, keeping todd at arm's length- he is in s1 (brushing away todd's questions) and moreso in s2 (the wet circles, not wanting todd to be in the house within a house with him,ect). the constant dismissal is going to start becoming discouraging. how is todd supposed to help someone who wants help but also doesn't want help? plus todd wants to help dirk! finding amanda is his main priority, yes. but he is down to be his assistant

todd knows dirk cares for him- doesn't know just how much- but being told that to dirk 'he's just a guy whose life he ruined' we can 1. add a big old dose of guilt on todd's end, and 2. that probably feels like a slap to the face, even if todd likely knows dirk did that on purpose. (also a smaller detail, that admittedly might be reaching a bit, during dirk's rant he mentions that '-And then I end up alone!' despite the fact todd hadn't actually left yet, hadn't given any indication that he has given up on dirk. but it reads as dirk rejecting todd already)

they don't actually know eachother that well. one week, then a two month gap, then s2 was around a week long. they absolutely haven't worked their footing out yet.

to add to that- their communication sucks. especially dirk tbh. he probably was keeping todd at arm's length in a misguided way of protecting him. and tbh i don't think dirk was ready to let todd in yet. this is nobody's fault- todd wanting to be let in, and dirk shutting him out. this could be a sperate post but i think the 2x08 rescue, and the 'don't spin out' in 2x09 was dirk finally letting todd in.

self-recognition through the other. or todd seeing himself in dirk (but not in the sexy way) the way dirk was talking, even the words he was saying, his attitude, his anger... todd's been there. and who does todd hate most of all?

todd put all his faith in dirk. granted, this is todd's own undoing and nothing dirk could've done. but dirk quitting being a detective maybe have been a reason why todd got mean. at this point todd's got no money, no job, no home, no purpose. dirk gave him a purpose that he threw away right in front of him. however, to consider- todd didn't lose faith in dirk. despite the anger and the words said, todd had total faith dirk will work it out. and he did. (this comes back to my thoughts on 2x08/2x09, so i won't delve into them here)

that's all i got for now. it's very easy to fall down a rabbit hole with this scene and these characters. and i can easily do a follow-up on this because i've def missed things. but this is getting so long. ultimately, i don't think either was in the right headspace in that scene- they had differing motivations. and neither was the villain for that.

tldr: messy situation between two messy people is messy on both ends

#theres so much else to say and analyse but this is getting long #dghda #dirk gently's holistic detective agency #todd brotzman #dirk gently #brotzly #gentlyman #dghda meta #dirk stans... promise youll be chill yeah?#im not slighting dirk but ive been in the fandom long enough to notice how dirks treated sometimes by his stans #i apologise if i come across blunt/mean but i am tired of the common narrative of this scene #dghda 2x07

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trophyposting · 9 months

Text

TROPHY HEADCANONS bc i am spinning him around in my mind 24/7

•he LOVES studio ghibli movies bc of the art. he saw some of the residents watching ponyo in the lobby and he did that thing where he just stood in one place not sitting down to watch it bc he didnt wanna seem like he liked it. but he does. his favorite scenes art-wise are the big zoomed out landscapes and that one scene in ponyo where the town is underwater

•he cries like super easily (see waffling about and this post) and he doesnt even have to be very upset either it just kind of happens. crybaby ass

•he is an (probably undiagnosed) adhd-haver. i dont really have any evidence for this i just feel it in my bones

•he has NPD. i do have evidence for this one actually but that would be a whole post on its own honestly

•eventually his interest in photography extends to an interest in things he likes to photograph (eg. plants/flowers and butterflies)

•when clover comes to the island trophy ends up photographing (and by extension hanging out with) her a lot because she's, like, supernaturally photogenic and trophy loves how photos of her turn out. they become friends :-)

•he actually does genuinely dominate at dodgeball bc it involves two of his favorite things: 1. violence and 2. targeting the most autistic people he can find. cheesy just happened to throw him off with that joke about balls (also one of his favorite things)

•there's gotta be like some actual psychological warfare shit going on between trophy and tissues bc not only are they both petty bitches (more accurately tissues is a petty bitch and trophy is quick to anger and holds grudges which creates a self-perpetuating cycle of bitchiness) and they also spent like,., months in a closet together which is of course a recipe for disaster. in the case of limegold they're like that post about having sex by standing on opposite sides of the room fully-clothed trying to explode each other with their minds

•if trophy and cabby met i think they would actually hit it off bc he loves talking about himself and cabby loves knowing things about people. i even think he would be understanding of her memory issues bc his adhd ass would be like "? you forget things sometimes? hey me too dw abt it" bc like. even if her memory problems are more severe than his he still, like, understands yk (i do NAWT CARE if this is ooc they mean everything. 2 me)

•if trophy and silver spoon met silver spoon would dislike him for being "uncivilized and uncouth" and trophy would dislike him for being a snob. i love the aesthetic of those two as a duo but sadly i can't imagine them befriending each other

•he's probably from some totally obscure and random state in the midwest. like, iowa or nebraska or something. minnesota perhaps

•he kind of knows, at least on some level, that his decision-making skills aren't. great. that knowledge has not and never will stop him from continuing to make questionable decisions

•he loves relaxing and being alone, probably more than anyone would expect. he does have a workout regimen as fan said but working out is really more of a meditative and stress-relieving activity for him even if he isn't really fully aware of it. this is also (at least part of the reason) why he loves photography

•he kind of hates sleeping in his room bc of tissues' sneezing so he's developed insomnia and kind of just. wanders around at night. when he does get tired he just falls asleep in random places, usually on the couch in the lobby but sometimes he just. passes out on the floor

•that is. it :-)

#🏆#my headcanons #k talks #trophy ii #suggestive tw #ig? bc of sex mention

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stopscammingartists · 19 days

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apology doc guy again and im going purely off memory here but heres some extra info. glip claiming pengo forced feelings out of them really doesnt makes sense based on what I know and witnessed even aside from the apology. glip very much wanted to hear pengos side at the time of the docs and talk about their mutual experiences with marl. I got the feeling that's a lot of why pengo was willing to speak with them again since at this point glip believed him and was willing to listen to what he went through with marl back then. like he felt vindicated finally and wanted to feel some form of closure. from my knowledge glip initiated all of that (like with the cryptic messages to get his attention with buying his music and shit). I dont think either of then forced feelings out of the other during that time. it seemed more like a mutual vent session between two people who experienced the same horrible guy.

glip has this habit of retroactively rewriting their reality when they feel they need justification for their anger or behavior imo. this could be some weird trauma response or just baseline narcissism but they always feel they need to explain why they're upset with someone and will pick at things in the past to do so. kinda wish they'd realize sometimes youre just mad lmao. and for what it's worth, back in 2020 when writing the docs glip really did seem more open to change and more sane for lack of a better word or at least they played it off that way. even had pengo sending them examples of the things they've done (cruel posts/name calling victims/just general shitty behavior) so they could answer for it and didnt react to it with anger or aggression. i mean I was involved in that whole thing and they never attacked me despite me being one of those that called them out openly. also at this time there was only one dog so there was no reason to doubt their claims that marl forced them. this whole thing had been a mess to see and I honestly hate that its turned out this way. really had hope back then that glip was genuine.

This all lines up with what people have told me who were close to Glip around the time.

glip has this habit of retroactively rewriting their reality when they feel they need justification for their anger or behavior imo.

I agree with this observation. A more blatant example of this is how when Glip released that 'consent' podcast a few months back, someone called them out on their hypocrisy when it comes to consent on cohost - specifically talking about Routine Maintenance, a rape VN Woz wrote that Glip hosts based off the time Woz raped someone on a bus and to express Woz's 'feelings' (of wanting to rape!?!?!?) Rina at the time........someone who happened to have been raped on a bus and was groomed by Woz under Glip's watch as a child.

They pointed out that they really should have Rina's consent to upload this and Glip just.....rewrote reality? and said Routine Maintenance was about 'their character'. Meanwhile in another comment on the same post Woz was readily admitting that yes the rape visual novel was based on their feelings of how they raped someone and their feelings of wanting to rape Rina. Because. Of course.

this whole thing had been a mess to see and I honestly hate that its turned out this way. really had hope back then that glip was genuine.

Honestly?

I did too. This blog sat inactive around that time until Rina's zine last year because of that hope.

It's sad, Glip really didn't deserve that benefit of the doubt even back then I think, but even still they got it and still trampled all over it.

#floraverse #glitchedpuppet #forbidden flora #pengosolvent #forbiddenflora #foxflux #fox flux

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