#think of the toys people! think of the stupid kids buying our toys!!!

[ilovebeingaturtle]

Their weapons btw

#AHDKAHS #if you’re wondering about Jennika I wanted to try think about how they would have been if they were made /for/ 87 #so Jenny’s usual claws might have been seen as too similar to Shredder which they wouldn’t want if they were making toys #think of the toys people! think of the stupid kids buying our toys!!! #so tonfa! plus I just think that’d be fun for heR #Venus gets a tessen because she’s had them before in the past and also #the p u n potential #they’d allow her to be silly and that’s the most important thing for an 87 weapon #she could like blow opponents away and all other types of visual gags AHA #and then yeah I don’t think I need to explain Lita you guys get it #87!Venus AU #87 to the max

[mr2swap]

The incident: This man is my son

- Nate What the hell are you doing? -From falling my Briefcase to the ground while The funny creature that was in my new armchair began to bark without moving from its comfortable place in the muscular arms of my little son Nate, the long and smelly feet of my son stank the entire room with the musky odor of the sweat from his feet.

- Isn't it great dad? her name is Zoey, Mom and I rescued her on the way home, and don't worry about taking her for a walk I'm going to start jogging in the mornings before I go to school, and I'll pick up everything I do in the garden and I'm going to…- I made a hand gesture for her to stop and immediately there was silence, with the same hand I rubbed my hundred to try to alleviate the migraine that was beginning to attack me -Just... it's fine just don't put her on the sofa and clean what she does- I continued on my way towards the kitchen while Nate smiled at me with those lips hidden in a beard recently shaved by my wife Naina, in a second Nate wrapped his long arms around the dog and lowered her to the ground.

-And don't put your feet up on the table! - I yelled before entering the kitchen, once again Zoey the new member of the family barked at me and stayed while she and my huge and noisy son stayed in the living room, as soon as I entered the kitchen I almost tripped over one of my son's toys, put away the little red tricycle with a soft kick that my son usually plays with after coming home from the gym, maybe I should buy him a bike before he breaks it with his new weight of 265 pounds and his height of 6.5 feet tall but I should teach him how to drive it first just like I taught him how to shave.

The government psychologist assured me that it was only a matter of time before me to get used to my new son and his new body, but for me, it is still embarrassing to have to explain to the neighbors that the manly, muscular, shirtless white man who is playing basketball in our front yard is actually my little son Nate.

I couldn't do anything but get used to having another "man" at home, the government is trying to reverse the random exchanges but the terrorists altered the gas so that the effects would be indefinite, maybe forever, I went to the stove to prepare a chamomile tea, while I waited for the sound of the kettle to alert me, I tried to remember my life before that stupid accident in the subway.

Before Nate was the huge 6.5 feet tall hairy gorilla sitting in my living room he was an ordinary kid coming home to his grandfather from elementary school, the same way thousands of people inhaled the gas that a group of terrorists had stolen from a Swap Corp truck and when they woke up they found themselves trapped in the body of some stranger next to them!

The incident destroyed many lives and separated many families But Nate doesn't seem upset with his new body I don't think I've ever seen him smile so much now that he's a 33-year-old man, He doesn't have to go to school so while I and his mom are working he spends his mornings at the gym or playing video games but he still visits his old friends from elementary school to beat them at basketball and tell them all about his new life as a white man.

Of course, my father was also affected by the body-swapping gas, and right now he is spending his retirement money on his vacation in South Korea Before he left he said something about connecting with his new culture and his new age.

He was really lucky to end up in the body of “Yoon” a 25-year-old Korean man who was just at the station to take a couple of photos for his Instagram, at first Grandpa was puzzled by his adorable face and body. of a Greek god but now from all the pictures on the beach and in clubs on the other side of the world, it seems that he is having fun with his second chance. I can't say the same for the real Yoon, The term in my father's fat and old African-American body, and is living in a government asylum for people affected by the incident that's another story...

Hey folks! if you like bodyswap stories take a look at my patreon, I have a lot of more stories, and you can help me keep creating more stories!

#body swap #male body swap #bodyswap #body switch #male transformation

[bro-atz]

rooftop philosophy

in which: all hunter wants is a place to eat his lunch peacefully, but you disrupt the peace

pair: hunter/gn!reader

word count: 2k

content: fluff, a lot of unpopular opinions, slight heartbreak, kissing, teasing, and a box of chocolates?

apply for the permanent taglist here!

Hunter never thought that he’d have to share his safe place. He discovered that the roof was always unlocked one day by accident because he ran to the top of the stairs and tripped, his hand pushing the door open. He was running away from club recruiters that day. The school’s club fest was going on, and each booth tried to grab him before the other one could, hence the running away. Hunter was popular, and he knew that and he didn’t hate it, but he wasn’t a huge fan of all of the attention either. He needed a place he could go to and decompress in the middle of the school day.

So, when you showed up, he was flabbergasted. He was pretty careful about coming to the roof. All of his friends knew that he would go some place else to have lunch— they assumed with his significant other or something— and they all respected his privacy. You, on the other hand, were not close with Hunter in the slightest. You noticed every day around lunch time that he would sneak off somewhere, and one day, you decided to follow him all the way up to the roof.

The boy reluctantly shared his space with you because he was nice but also because he was scared that you were going to tell someone about the fact that the doors to the roof were unlocked and then the school would lock the doors and he’d have to find a new place. You, however, did not know this fear. You just wanted to enjoy the air outside, and the only times to do that were either during gym class or lunch.

You weren’t one to talk much in class, but you loved talking to your friends. You didn’t know if you could consider Hunter your friend on that kind of level, but talking to him was easy because he would just sit and eat his lunch in peace and occasionally agree with you while you talked about all the things in the world that concerned you, most of them being unpopular opinions.

“I still don’t get why people say money can’t buy happiness,” you started one day. “Money can totally buy happiness. My neighbors were really upset with their grandma died, and two weeks later, they were happy because they bought a dog. A dog. That’s literally buying happiness.”

Hunter nodded slightly in agreement, but you didn’t notice.

“I can’t make myself happy without spending money nowadays. No one can. If you want cheer up by eating chocolate or something, you have to buy it, right? That’s buying happiness. Little kids always want stuffed animals or toys, and when they’re sad, parents usually buy something to make them happy. That’s also buying happiness! Whoever said money can’t buy happiness is stupid.”

You continued talking while Hunter cleaned up the wrappers around him— he was pretty much done eating.

“The quote came from 1750 or something, so it makes sense for then, but now? Money is happiness. Material wealth is tied to happiness, and you can quote me on that.”

The bell rang. The unspoken agreement between the two of you was that you would head back to the classroom first, then him a couple minutes later. It’s not that he didn’t want to be caught with you, but he didn’t want his hiding spot being found, and if people thought you two were together, then it meant risking the discovering of his spot.

“Fairy tales are horrible if you really think about it. They tell you that there’s always a good person and an evil person and that you’re either one or the other. Fables are where it’s at. Those have lessons and morals, and more humanizing. Give me a lesson over a conquest any day.”

“Christmas is not the best holiday. Halloween is. We should be celebrating Halloween and having that day off to work on our costumes and enjoy the weather before it gets freezing cold outside.”

“Trying to put sweet and salty things in the same snack is gross and doesn’t work. They should come together but be packed separately so we can balance the flavors the way we want to.”

You would come upstairs with a new opinion everyday, and Hunter would listen to your opinions everyday.

As the school year progressed, there was one boy in Hunter’s friend group that caught your attention: Junghoon. Every time you saw him, your heart would flutter. He was always smiling and always laughing, and you knew that you didn’t stand a chance with him because of how immensely popular he was with the rest of the student body. Until…

“Forgetting to hit send on a message really does happen! Why do people automatically assume that it’s a white lie?! I literally forgot to hit submit on my homework last night, and now I have detention. I swear, I did the work…”

The bell rang. Hunter got up, and you left first. Same as usual. When you stayed back in school that day to serve your detention, you ended up getting to spend it with Junghoon, who was also in detention for the same reason as you. 

“I do this all the time,” Junghoon sighed as he admitted to you. “I just suck at responding and pressing buttons. I’ll have something I want to ask someone and have it all typed out, but when they don’t respond, I get upset, and then check my messages to see that I never sent the damn thing. So annoying.”

“Haha, tell me about it,” you said as you stared dreamily at him. That was also the shortest sentence you said that day.

It made you so happy that your opinion was actually a fact that was proven by Junghoon, but it also made you happy that you got to spend time with him.

You never stopped thinking about Junghoon after that day. You fell for him. Hard. You were planning on confessing to him for Valentine’s Day because, as far as you could tell, he was single, no one else was in pursuit of him, and there was no harm in trying.

What a lie. There was totally harm in trying. You got him a cute little box of chocolates and waited for him before school in front of the gates. You were going to pull him aside and hand him the box of chocolates then confess, but before you could even do that, you saw Junghoon walk towards the gate hand in hand with another student in your class. You wanted to lie to yourself again and say that they were just friends, but then when you saw them hug and kiss, your world came crashing down. You quickly shuffled your way back to the school building, shoved the chocolates back into your bag, and sat at your desk.

Your eyes were misty for the first half of the day, but as the day progressed, your sadness morphed into humor as a defense mechanism then into cynicism. By the time you got to lunch, you justified to yourself why someone like Junghoon was totally out of your reach.

“Here’s the thing, Hunter,” you started with your lecture the second the rooftop door closed behind you. “Things are beautiful. People are beautiful. The world is beautiful. But! Not everything is beautiful. Not everyone is beautiful. The entire world is not beautiful.”

You plopped down on the ground next to him. He continued eating, you continued talking— lunch as per usual.

“I wonder what it must be like to be beautiful. I imagine those people are always, “oh my God, being beautiful is so hard! My life is so tragic!” and then they’re just sweating sparkles and gold and you’re annoyed with them because living a beautiful life is nothing. Nothing! They don’t have to work for anything! Things just fall into their hands.”

Hunter raised an eyebrow because this was a different rant for once.

“I will never know that feeling because I’m not beautiful,” you explained. “People are attracted to and love beautiful things… And I am not one of them.”

“Y/N, shut up,” Hunter said— he had never, ever said anything during your rants or lectures, but this time was different because the rant was different.

“What? It is true. Beautiful things, beautiful people— no one can resist them. Meanwhile, me? I’m not someone’s first choice, and I’m not really a choice anyone considers because I’m not beautiful or even pretty. I’m just… Okay. I’m mid. I’m aight. Not attractive, just aight.”

“Stop it, Y/N.”

“What’s your deal? Since when do you care about what I talk about? You usually just ignore me, anyway.”

“No, I don’t.”

“See? You don’t care—”

“I do care, Y/N,” Hunter interrupted. “And I don’t ignore you. I always listen to everything you say and stay quiet because I usually agree, but right now? Right now, you’re so wrong.”

“Huh? Wrong about what? Liking beautiful things? Do you not like beautiful things?”

“I do, but that’s not what I’m taking about. You’re not just okay, you’re not mid… I’d say you’re aight, but you’re beautiful, too.”

You stared at Hunter for a solid minute before bursting out laughing. He had such a serious look on his face, and he made the funniest joke with that straight face of his. “That’s a funny joke, Hunter. You should be a comedian,” you said while wiping tears from your eyes.

Hunter’s face didn’t even flinch, causing you to laugh all over again. His stone face was incredible. You continued to laugh, but he still didn’t laugh; he didn’t even smile because he wasn’t joking.

“Hunter, you don’t have to lie to make me laugh and feel better, but thanks for that. I needed it.”

“I wasn’t lying.”

“Wait, but wasn’t the joke the fact that it’s a lie? See, wait. Let me look it up…” You took your phone out and typed quickly pulling up the definition of the word. “Okay, it says here that beautiful means “pleasing the senses or mind aesthetically, and of a very high standard,” and that definition is definitely not—”

Hunter couldn’t take it anymore. He grabbed your wrist and moved your phone away from your face before pressing his lips firmly against yours. Your eyes went wide, only for you to squeeze your eyes shut when you felt Hunter’s other hand move to the back of your head and hold you gently, his lips leaving an additional kiss, then two, then more until your phone slipped out of your hand. You were completely flabbergasted when he finally stopped and moved back, your eyes staring into his.

“W-wh-what…?” For once, you had no words.

“Now you listen, and let me talk,” he said gently. “Originally, I let you come up here because I didn’t want to lose the access to the roof. I was slightly annoyed at first because I wanted to eat my lunch in peace, but every day, you come up here with something new to talk about, and I’m always intrigued and entertained.”

“I had no—”

“Shut up, I’m not done,” Hunter held a finger to your lips. “I like your company, Y/N, and I like you, so it kills me to hear you say those kinds of things about yourself. So, stop it.”

You stared at Hunter, eyes wide, jaw dropped. 

“I always care about everything you say and think and do, Y/N. If I didn’t, I would have made you stop talking like I did today.”

Hunter let go of your hand and moved away from you while you were still shellshocked. Your mind was blank for once, until a tiny intrusive thought entered your head.

“I have a question,” you told him.

“What is it?”

“So, if I say things you don’t agree with, will you make me stop talking?”

“Yes.”

“Would you make me stop talking the way you did just now?”

Hunter took a second to process the question before going hot red in the face. He let out a couple of empty noises before looking away from you, steam literally rising from the top of his head because of how embarrassed he was. You had to stifle a laugh as you watched him react to your genuine inquiry.

“Love isn’t a choice,” you teased him. “You only like me because you spend so much time with me.”

“Y/N—”

“You just don’t want to be alone on Valentine’s Day.”

“I swear to God—”

“You just want me to give you a box—”

Just as he said, Hunter shut you up, and he shut you up by kissing you again. You couldn’t help but giggle as his soft lips encompassed yours and his fingers tickled your neck and cheek. You kissed him back, suppressing the urge to smile in between each one. It was only when the bell rang that the two of you separated, a slow exhale leaving your lips as he moved away. A small smile settled on your face as Hunter looked away shyly, his face a light shade of pink. You stood up and helped him clean up before heading to the rooftop doors.

“I’ll head down first,” you told him.

Just as you took one step down, you felt him grab your wrist. You turned to look at him, his face still pink, and his eyes barely able to maintain contact with yours.

“Yeah?”

“Um… You said something about a box…”

“What, you want me to give you a box of chocolates?” you asked with a snicker.

“I wouldn’t be opposed…” he mumbled.

“Okay, I’ll give you the box… Tomorrow.”

You shuffled down the stairs while laughing to yourself, and as you turned to take the second set of stairs down, you looked up to see Hunter with a huge grin on his face. He, like you, couldn’t wait for tomorrow to come.

#xikers #xikers hunter #hunter xikers #hunter x reader #park hunter #xikers park hunter #park hunter xikers #papungkorn lertkiatdamrong #xikers fluff #xikers imagine #xikers fanfic #xikers fanfiction #xikers hunter au #broatz

[clarkes-and-god]

Cherish's Diary:

I don't know what to do. Tobias has been arrested for assaulting a public officer, and there's no way we can get him out. His bail is $5,000! He keeps phoning me about it, and I feel so bad but there's no way I can even pay the $500 to get a bond for him. I have some tips from work, but they make up barely half of that, and there's nothing in the bank account he's been managing. Only all the stupid stuff he buys, and I can't really give a bondsman video game skins and packs of cigarettes. I did ask Momma and Daddy if they could help pay it, and we'd pay them back soon, but Daddy reminded me that I'm grown and I should have managed the finances better and saved some money to prepare for this sort of stuff. That's what he always told me growing up, and I know he's right; but Tobias said he wanted to manage the money, and I can't argue with him, he's my husband! I could ask Esther, but I'd feel awful asking an elderly widow to pay for things that are my responsibility, and I don't think she has much to spare herself, with that boy who does the yard work for church looking after her.

I know Tobias is a good man really, he just gets a bit worked up sometimes, and that's what happened when that social worker came over. He just was upset that our kids might have been at risk! I mean, to me the social worker seemed nice, but men's brains work differently, so maybe he realised there was an issue and I didn't. I just hope whoever is in charge of sentencing him understands the situation and isn't harsh, seeing as it was just a mistake. We really need him at home, he's so sweet when he's happy, and I don't think we can do without the money he gives me from Christ Chicken. Luckily, I've told my manager that my schedule changed and she's given me some extra shifts. So we should be ok for now, but I do need to ask someone to watch Neveah and Travis.

The kids are all shook up from what happened! Poor Mandy is just in hysterics because she thinks it's all her fault -- she told her teacher what she was doing at the weekend and the teacher didn't seem happy according to her. Honestly, I wasn't too happy when she said that Tobias had left her all alone with the little ones -- she's still only 7 -- but I will have to tell her not to talk about things like that to people who won't understand. I'll leave it until she's a little less upset though, I don't think she'd cope with that sort of talk at the moment. For now, she's been praying for her Daddy, which is very sweet of her.

Tyson and Neveah haven't been any better. Tyson has got such an attitude, he won't listen to anything I say. He's been moping in his room and yelling at his siblings. And after school today, his teacher pulled me aside and said he had to be sent out for distracting the class! I know he's always been loud and energetic at school, he's a boy after all, but that's never happened before! The teacher did say he understood with the situation at home, but I can't believe it. He's always been such a sweet boy and now he's just being awful! I'm praying it resolves itself soon, and Mandy starts coping a little better, because it's honestly horrible to be in the house with the two of them. They're just setting each other off at the minute, and then that upsets Neveah and Travis. I think poor Neveah doesn't understand enough to know what's going on, but she knows something's changed and Daddy's not here anymore, and it's really upsetting her. She's normally such an independant little girl, but it's like she's gone back to being a baby. She won't let me leave her alone, and she's not sleeping through the night. She's slept through the night since she was about 8 months old! And if I do leave her alone, she's just breaking all the toys or trying to ruin the furniture. I feel like I need 3 extra pairs of hands to deal with them all at the minute. I know they must be missing their Daddy, but I am too, and they're not easy to parent just now. Lord, I am praying that everything will go smoothly for Tobias and we can all go back to normal soon, because I don't think I can manage all on my own for long. You designed man and wife to be joined together in marriage and not seperated, and I am really feeling why You designed it that way with these struggles at the moment. Please give me strength.

#cherish #tobias #tyson #mandy #fundie sims #quiverfull sims #fundie snark #fundie simblr #modest sims #satire #homeschool sims

[splendentmoon]

Incorrect Quotes/6/

hello!! hehe I haven't posted in a while, huh? I'm sorry, I was having some personal problems but I'm back!

enjoy! ✨

----------------------------------

-Jin in the middle of a call with Yin, driving a stolen car with Red Son bleeding-

Jin: don't worry Yin, I'm already taking Red to the hospital!

-Jin turns to see Red Son and notices that his eyes are closed-

Jin: RED IS DEAD!!

Red Son: JUST REST YOUR FUCKING EYES!!

----------------------------------

-Jin in the passenger seat next to Yin who is driving-

Jin: ............Bro, where are the kids?

Yin: in the back seat.

Jin: Bro, they're not...

Yin (stop the car suddenly): HOW ARE THEY NOT THERE?! WHERE THE FUCK ARE THEY?!

Little Sprindax: they forgot us at the McDonald's games...do you think I can?

Little MK: I guess...

Little Spindrax: well....... THEY ARE SONS OF-

-Spindrax shouted several bad words with MK covering his ears until Yin and Jin picked them up-

----------------------------------

Yin: do you really think it was a good idea to buy MK that squeaky toy?

Jin: yes, don't worry, MK is very quiet and calm, we won't regret it!

-After 2 weeks without sleeping or concentrating thanks to MK liking the toy-

Yin: did you say?

Jin: yes, my fault

----------------------------------

-when the trio of idiots decide to give MK drugs-

Yin: this kid is crazy...

Jin: BACK FOR YOUR OWN SAFETY!

MK: LET ME GO FUCKING FUCKING COPS! DO NOT TOUCH ME! THEY DON'T KNOW WHO I AM?! I AM THE FUCKING MASTER ASSHOLE!!

Spindrax (holding the stoned MK): damn, MK is being a jerk right?

MK (pointing to Red Son): AND YOUR FOUR EYES ARE GOING TO FUCK YOUR MOTHER!! YOU WILL SEE!!

-Spindrax and Jin manage to take him home to keep people safe-

----------------------------------

Red Son: So, what's the stupidest thing you believed as a kid?

Jin: I thought that if Santa didn't have a chimney he couldn't enter the house.

MK: I thought I was going to be happy...

Spindrax: I thought that-...wait, what the fuck did you say MK?!

----------------------------------

-Yin, showing her garden to the whole group-

Yin: look, here are my crops, aren't they great?

Yin: People think they are potato crops, but no, they are weed crops.

Jin and Spindrax: Oh, you invite?

Yin: let me think about it...... NO! It's my fucking speck to sell! Where do you think I get money for bullshit? From Narnia?!

Jin and Spindrax: selfish...

----------------------------------

-the stupid trio (MK, Spindrax and Red Son) were caught drunk by the police for vandalism and were taken to Yin and Jin, who robbed a store, MK came up with something to escape-

MK: I can get my pulse down to zero but only for a minute RUN! -snaps his fingers and temporarily dies, all the officers surround MK and his friends escape-

Yin: MK scares me sometimes....

Spindrax, Red Son and Jin: same....

----------------------------------

-Spindrax and Red are in a fancy restaurant for demons-

Spindrax: They used to give bigger glasses in this restaurant.

Red Son: really?

Spindrax: Yes, but they changed them because people were taking food hidden inside them.

Red Son: and how do you know-...

Spindrax: the people were me jsjsjsjs

----------------------------------

Red Son: I'm the only one who can do it!

Jin: you're also the only one who doesn't trust his friends.

Red Son:

Yin:

Spindrax:

MK: run Jin....

Red Son: HOW THE FUCK DID YOU TELL ME?!

Jin: I'm screwed!!

----------------------------------

MK: Why does he call you baby in the chat you have with Mei?

Spindrax: How about we stop talking for a while?

----------------------------------

Spindrax: Red Son won't wake up, what do I do?

Jin: Did you try to kick it?

Spindrax: Yes.

Jin: I ran out of ideas.

----------------------------------

Spindrax: A party is the celebration of life, bringing people together so that the guest of honor knows how much they are loved. DBK has done a lot for us. This is our chance to do something for him.

MK: Forcing him to have fun at a party he doesn't want to be at?

Spindrax: I knew you'd understand.

----------------------------------

Red Son (to his parents): I tell you, my friends are competent -a call arrives and he answers-

MK (on ​​the phone): Red Son! Spindrax tried to make pasta in the coffee pot and now it's broken!

----------------------------------

Teacher: Your brothers got into a fight.

Yin: What they what?!

Jin: Did they win?

----------------------------------

Spindrax (at Red Son's funeral): I need a moment with him.

All: Of course. -They go-

Spindrax (leaning over Red Son's coffin): Okay, listen, you little shit. I know you're not dead.

Red Son: Yeah, don't fuck around

----------------------------------

-MK and Spindrax set fire to half the kitchen-

Yin: I hope you have an explanation for this.

Spindrax: We have three actually-

MK: Pick your favourite.

----------------------------------

Spindrax: Alright, listen up you little idiots.

Spindrax: Not you MK. You are an angel and we are delighted that you are here.

----------------------------------

Red Son: I'M GOING TO SET FIRE AND BURN EVERYTHING TO THE GROUND! I AM ANGRY-

MK: Awwww, you're so adorable! Come on give me a hug~

Red Son: NO, I'M SUPPOSED TO BE AFRAID! TREMBLE BEFORE MY WRATH-

Spindrax (recording): -laughing- awww how cute

----------------------------------

Yin: MK, how is it possible that you have gotten into so much trouble in one day?

MK: No... It didn't take all day.

----------------------------------

-Trio of idiots on the roof of a very drunk building-

Spindrax, Red Son and MK: JUMP!! JUMP!! LETS JUMP!! -the three jump-

-at home with Yin-

Yin: something just happened...

----------------------------------

Jin: I'm fast at math.

Red Son: Ok, what is 38 times 76?

Jin: 24.

Red Son: That wasn't even close.

Jin: But it was fast.

----------------------------------

Spindrax: You think you're smarter than the rest.

Red Son: I don't think I'm smarter than the others. I know that I am.

----------------------------------

Spindrax: We need to open this locked door. Red Son, give me your credit card.

Red Son: Here. -He gives-

Spindrax (pocketing it): Thank you. MK, break down the door.

Red Son: ...DAUGHTER OF-

----------------------------------

Red Son: So I might be in love, but you're not gonna like it

Spindrax: just rip off the band-aid

Red Son: ... is your brother, MK.

Spindrax: put that damn band-aid back on.

----------------------------------

-Spindrax is holding MK to prevent him from falling off a cliff-

Spindrax: hold on please! That without you there is no team!

MK: Bye, Sis! Thanks for giving me a hand, but it's slipperyyyyyyyyyyyy.... -falls off the cliff-

Red Son (catches it in the air): uff....... BUT HOW DO YOU DROP IT ANIMAL?! DON'T YOU SEE YOU'RE USELESS?!

Spindrax: WHY DON'T YOU SAY IT TO MY FACE?!

Red Son: YES I TELL YOU QUADRUPE!!!

Spindrax: SHUT UP VIPED!!!

----------------------------------

#lego monkie kid #lmk mk #lmk qi xiaotian #mk #lmk spindrax #lmk yin #jin lmk #venomdragon #VenomDragonShipping #lmk au #abandonedprinceAu #spicynoodleshipping #spicynoodles

[folieadeuxdy]

stupid entitled rant or whatever under the cut but

i wish people would stop buying us presents for our animals. very, very few people in my life (ok, one person who Knows Who They Are) know enough about *correct* animal husbandry practices and keep getting us toys and treats that are actively harmful and then getting sad when they don’t get pictures of my pets playing with the toys, because I threw them away immediately! at christmas we got this stupid stocking full of cat toys my dog would absolutely eat and throw up but it had some crinkle balls my cat might have liked and I had already thrown away the other 4 toys we got for them that day and i thought “ugh fine i’ll just keep this one where the dog can’t get it” but the problem is my cat doesn’t understand that Certain Toys have to stay in the gated-off area of the house and she’ll carry them away. so after the third time my dog woke me up at 3am throwing one of those toys up i said fuck it and threw them all out like i should have done in the first place. but did the throwing up stop? no! because by that point she’d distributed them throughout the house! i just got back from a stupidly exhausting travel day at like 10p last night and passed out but guess who was up cleaning ANOTHER pile of eaten and un-eaten cat toy at 6a today? me, motherfuckers! he had barely been home for two hours yesterday, where did he even find it???? just. everyone stop buying the shitty toys please. i did not ask for the shitty toys. this is happening because EVERYONE on both sides of our family view our pets as our “children” so since they can’t get us toys for our “kids” they get us pet toys instead, but none of them have ever taken good care of an animal! they are universally shitty pet parents! i have much, MUCH higher standards and frankly think they’re all only barely taking care of their pets well enough to stop me from calling animal control on them. they don’t know what treats are terrible for pets. they don’t know which toys are dangerous. my mother in law keeps walking my dog on his collar instead of his harness when she babysits but that’s tangential it’s just fuckin stop…spending your money…when i didn’t ask you to spend your money…because my devotion to my pets not getting sick is MUCH higher than my devotion to letting them have a toy just because you bought it. it’s the best part of having pets, they don’t speak human and have no concept of christmas and will not notice if they get no presents. it will go in the trash. or, the best case scenario is that it will get played with for 5 seconds, eaten, partially digested, vomited, and THEN go in the trash. just stop. everyone for the love of god stop

#vomit mention in here #just. aaaaaaaaa

[smileymoth]

This is Daniel!! He is my pride and joy, and drawing him truly makes me feel really happy ^_^

Under cut is a whole lot of information about him!!!

I originally created him in April 2013, but he was a girl named Kristina back then. I feel like I have to acknowledge the mess that was Kris the Cat before I get onto more relevant information: She was THE scene kid, THE evil girlie who wanted to poison everyone. THE one with dark blue wings and awful lot of make-up even though IRL I couldn't dream of putting make-up on ever (Repressed emo kid with "grr tomboy" mentality). She stayed with me for a whole year until 2014 June when I decided... hmm what if I Genderbend Her since I had seen some artists who I liked genderbend their own ocs. So I did. (That artwork I made is lost in the sauce forever, i think i deleted it off the web and then my dads computer got fucked so its gone permanently.) And that design of him kind of stuck with me more for unknown reasons so I made him my main sona.

Here's the timeline of his designs that I made back in 2020:

The reason why his name is Daniel is mostly due to Danny Murillo and Danny Worsnop, the lead singers of the 2 bands I was extremely in love with at the time. Hence my own name too. At the time I was 12, and because me and my bestie (hi Evan!!!!) were playing toys with our ocs on DeviantArt and wanted to make a band, we came up with 3 extra characters (he made Ethan and Aiden, I made Jack) and Danny became the lead singer of Fallen Soldier (epic cringey band name from cringey teens!!! I even made a failgirl logo for them!!) (The name originates from them probably listening to too much Rise Against and 5FDP)

I haven't changed his backstory too much from since we made it up the first time, since there's really no need to. When I say that my best friend is very intertwined in this world, I mean it. We built the world for these furries together and I will cherish it forever :3

ANYWAY let's get to the character info

***

Name: Daniel Varing, stagename Danny Smileymoth. (when I gave him that last name I was 12 so do not bully me for it literally meaning 'avalanche'. it would be an excellent scene kid name on myspace. danny avalanche. lol)

His friends call him Danny or Dan Dan sometimes.

Birthday: 1. February, (aquarius sun, libra moon, cancer rising) <- this part matches w me too

Gender: non-binary, he/she pronouns. (he doesn't care about gender since he doesn't understand it's importance)

Personality: He's very sweet and kind, and enthusiastic about the things he enjoys. He gets attached to people quickly, that also means he can be quite possessive over them, sometimes feeling unnecessarily jealous when his friends don't pay as much attention to him as he'd like. He understands that this is a personal flaw and doesn't act upon it. His social battery drains real fast when he's out in crowded places, and mostly just enjoys spending time alone or in a small circle of friends. He enjoys art and music greatly. He needs a little bit help sometimes understanding social cues and such. She hates the Sun and tries to stay in the shade as much as possible, it makes her overheat. He likes to purr and knead when he's happy... he sometimes forgets to retract his nails so umm yeah. Meow. He likes people watching. He's normal I promise. (lie). He likes taking care of his friends.. he will make them gifts, buy them clothes or treats. He does have a bit of a short temper but he feels guilty about it, and tries to not lash out over stupid things that have no importance.

I mostly draw Danny wearing feminine clothes that can be related to emo/scene/goth/just alt fashion. Aka a lot of black. He does really like velvet and skirts though!!! Unlike me he does actually wear jeans too. :3 he just doesn't like them to be ripped, is all. He almost always keeps his hair down.

He loves the paisley pattern, velvet, corduroy, leather jackets, lacey skirts and shirts, leather shoes... you get the drill. He also always wears the metal bracelet on his right hand and the 2 necklaces around his neck. (just like meee)

Backstory Factoids:

As of right now he lives in California. He grew up in Estonia. He has been best friends with Jack since early childhood. He met Kratis at a local library where the mans was working. He got introduced to Kratis' friends, Ethan and Aiden. They had been planning on starting a band, and since Danny could sing, they just took him and made him the lead singer. Jack joined the band later on after Danny introduced him to the rest of his new friends.

He found Inbawez (weird freak of a pet) when wandering around a nearby forest, Inba took instant liking to him and never left.

Beside being in a band, he goes babysitting every now and then. He is also a freelance illustrator who does cute art commissions on the web.

The "California" they live in is not a representation of the actual USA Cali since I have never been there and we refuse to change their living location. All we know is that Daniel lives in the middle of the forest in a 2 story house with his boyfriend.

pre-danny lore Kristina lived in a hollow tree with her shadow pet Inbawez. She was obsessed with Kratis and due to forgotten circumstances she and Kratis are blood bound. lol

I think this is about it? I am definitely missing something but I want to post this since IT'S BEEN A MONTH SINCE I FINISHED THIS REF AAHH!!!! my pride and joy. feel free to draw her if you want :3 :3 :3 meow

#oc #danny #smileymothart #furry #this was supposed to be posted a month ago its been sitting in my drafts for too long. i am releasing my baby into the wild #reference sheet

[90s-html-lesbians]

About the immortal roommates au, it's a well-documented fact that the average human height has gradually increased over time, with ancient people actually being on the short side and viewing tall people as rare, special, and/or unnatural. Alba is 5'3", but Lorena is taller for a woman at 5'7", so for most of the time they've been alive, Ava would be considered normal height while Lilith would be looked at as a giantess. She would constantly have to duck her head under doorways and buy extra fabric to lengthen her clothes.

Ava teases her ENDLESSLY about her height, she's got jokes in languages and cultural contexts that don't even exist anymore, and it drives Lilith nuts!

But then! People mysteriously start getting taller... until the average person on the street is at least an inch or two taller than Ava... And people suddenly don't think Lilith is some freak of nature anymore, she's just tall for a woman. Then suddenly society is built for tall people, with high shelves and long clothes, and the number of short jokes skyrockets while tall jokes dwindle to almost nothing.

So who's laughing now, Ava? (It’s your girlfriend. She's towering over you and laughing in your short, little baby face.)

lmao i’m cackling

making me realize there’s probably a lot of holdovers from past millenias and stuff they’re all “back in my day over”

ava being the oldest has the most amount of “back in my day” stuff but she’s also the least self aware of it because she usually fits in the best as “one of the fellow kids”/young adult of the current generation and the stuff she’s all “back in my day” is mostly about obscure stuff and/or stuff that doesn’t usually come up in conversation, like the most popular way of tying a rope knot now vs back in the 15th century or something

also this isn’t related but i’m hcing ava as having several lives. they’re not infinite though and once all those lives are used up, she’s dead as a doornail. she’s at least used two or three by now, some from when she was first getting used to the “coming back from the dead and finding out you have more than one life.” and was kinda clumsy and careless

she’s super careful now though and plays that knowledge close to the chest i think in large part because it’s all ??? for her, she knows jack about it including how many lives she has left, which means every time she dies she’s very aware of the fact that the life she had up until now might’ve been the last and this could be the one to stick

(Or maybe she doesn’t even remember her previous lives and/or she only has limited memories, and the muscle memory from them and stuff like “avoid cliffs at all costs” ((because that’s how she died last time)) that she chalks up to “very strong instinct”)

toying with lilith having a bit of blood bending when she’s in a close vicinity to someone just for funsies

lilith won’t admit it but she’s lowkey a very hopeless romantic (is it really hopeless if she’s literally been in a steady relationship with ava for millennia?), and she’ll often get stuff like “this thing is stupid but it reminded me of our partnership over the ages and you like stupid, so 🤷, here it is”

kinda cat bringing dead animals to someone to express affection energy

she’ll also often get literature centered around close friends (literally close friends, because lilith and ava “reluctantly” consider each other their bff along side being their partner ((and later on same for beatrice ofc)) so they also like stories about very close friends) or romance stuff and be like “this reminds me of us but if i/we were in this situation i/we’d be significantly less stupid”

they’re all kinda sappy useless romantics but lilith especially, their apartment is littered with stuff that lilith’s got because it reminded her of them

both of them would be such critics of religion (not in a “anti any and all religion itself” way), especially given they’ve literally seen the birth of several religions including christianity into it becoming the big religion it is today)

both of them are really wary of religious figures and of immortals who have very little to no non human or supernatural aspects to them aside from their immortality/long lived/hard to kill, because they’ve usually done or are doing some shady shit to get and retain that

which is part of why lilith was initially very wary of ava, especially as she’s had personal bad experience with immortals pretending to be nice or helpful but actually being manipulative

the millenia of being alive has absolutely given ava & lilith such a weird and nerdy concept of fun which is made worse by their competitiveness, like one time they spent their time counting literally all the pebbles on the shore of some lake or beach, and another time building a whole home from scratch after the place they had been staying at was torn down, including the tools they used

i think they probably like trivia quizzes both because learning like what’s considered current pop culture is helpful for them to fit in, and it also helps them sharpen and exercise their memory, which is good because between the amount of years they’ve been alive, it’d be harder for them to realize if they’re forgetting or misremembering stuff, and they especially don’t want to forget the important stuff like stuff about each other and friends and family they’ve had over the millenia

they probably like crossword puzzles and sudoku and bingo too 😭, they really got the grandparent tastes and behaviors at times

#warrior nun #ava silva #sister lilith #fallenhalo #immortal roommates au #lilith villaumbrosia #wn #au #apologies for the late response but this week had me a bit busy and tired #the-darkness-not-bargain #ask #thx for the ask!! This au really living in my head rent free rn sjsjs

[memestockpile]

falsettos, act 1 (1992) feel free to change as needed.

bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, all the time.

what we need is a miracle!

we need to know our worst sides aren't ignored.

the guilt invested will in time pay wisely.

we're good in bed.

who stole the bed?

i'm nauseous.

i do not wish to offend.

i divorced my wife, i left my child, and i ran off with a friend.

i want a tight-knit family.

so it's [year], and we don't go by the book.

i love the way they cook linguine.

i swear we're gonna come through it.

sit down, my dear. i hear you have a problem.

take a load off your feet.

that's a question with no answer.

let's not discuss the weather, let's face the facts.

love isn't sex. that's a thing my husband once told me.

breathe deep, my dear.

put your head in my hands.

maybe, darling, so do you.

you're a lovely girl.

love is blind. love can tell a million stories. love's unkind, spiteful in a million ways.

[name] is a prick.

will you be my valentine?

i've a scalpel up my sleeve.

do not ever slit your wrists.

love reads like a bad biography, all the names are changed to protect the innocent.

i think she's very insecure, but so am i.

i never married. work is my passion.

yeah, i don't care to discuss it.

i admit, i admire you.

hang up all your clothes.

god, you're impossible.

we are the salt of the bourgeoisie.

[name] doesn't share my devotion to style.

men in cufflinks make me forget my name.

what is this, wash and wear?

[name] has unlimited knowledge of dreck.

i was rich, he was horny.

ha, don't be a fool.

i was trained in karate.

i'll kill for that thrill of first love.

do you love him?

it makes me feel i'm sort of smart.

well, that's not quite true.

the pitcher's handsome.

is it my fault, though? should i be blamed for that?

i don't live the life of a normal child.

i'm too smart for my own good, and i'm too good for my sorry little life.

honey, why don't you go out and play?

sweetheart. i worry.

what is normal?

please see a psychiatrist.

hey, kid, listen!

they don't make house calls.

that's what pretty boys should do.

this had better come to a stop.

this has been a tragic and horrible flop.

i'm frightened of questions.

don't touch me!

why is it always ourselves who have to change?

you've got a temper than redefines temper.

i'd like to be a princess on a throne.

my life is shitty.

i can cry on cue.

i'm breaking down.

it's just he's so damn happy, that it makes me so damn mad.

please come to our house.

it's a slight exaggeration, but he's sick in the head.

what should i say to the man? should i be mean to the man?

let's eat some food.

the kid looks pretty miserable.

ugh, ain't that the truth.

i get apoplexy thinking of my father. i resemble him in far too many ways.

stop! look around you. no one's screaming at you.

why don't you feel alright for the rest of your life?

her hand is ready, it only needs a ring.

i'll buy confetti and sing.

it's not my responsibility to ask you, but i wonder if it's ever crossed your mind?

i think you're swell.

i crave your wrist. i praise your thigh.

i'll love you until i die.

they grow, but don't mature.

their toys are people's lives.

it's a goddamn surety.

does this mean that i'm a fairy?

what a stupid theory!

i've made a decision to get the things i need.

i'll beat the odds, i'll have good sex.

please, don't watch me.

have a little scotch.

shit, i blew it.

i fear i've lost my head.

do you want my help?

i can think it through myself.

god, you're pretty.

maybe we should call it quits.

checkmate!

this had better come to a stop.

visit when you please. you are not required to phone.

i've a good and a bad side, but they're one and the same.

ask me to arouse you, i will rise and obey.

i screw every morning, then bathe and drink tea.

it's tough, my friend.

these are the games i play.

goodness, [name], i am relieved.

they are pseudo-romantic and sick!

how i despise your need for stupid conversation.

how could you ever deny what we had?

i never wanted to love you.

i hate the world!

i love the things i never had.

i think girls are the most beautiful thing.

what i've done to you is rotten.

this here is love, when we're talking face-to-face.

i've made my choice, you can sing a different song.

you'll be a man, kid.

#ask meme #roleplay #askbox meme #rp meme #inbox meme #inbox rp meme #ask #meme #askbox #roleplay meme #askbox rp #tumblr rp #rp #tumblr roleplay #rp inbox meme #rp sentence meme #sentence starters #sentence starter meme #sentence meme #roleplay sentence meme

[spaghettificationandpretzels]

Hello!! From you Kinkfest Pick and Mix, can I please have:

Raymond Smith

Bondage with Cuffs

Voice Kink

Sex Toys

Hand on Neck

I loved the last one you wrote for me so I'm back!!! Thankyou😘😘😘

My first Raymond Smith request, thank you so much!!! I am so so happy you liked your last one.

Masterlist

Solace

Contains: Fluff, mild angst, hurt/comfort, protective Ray, caretaker Ray, cuff bondage, voice kink, sex toys, hand on neck, fingering, P in V, aftercare.

2.3K words

Comment if you want to be tagged/removed or follow #sp's kinkfest pick and mix

Ray helps you out after a bad day at work

"Hey honey, can you come and pick me up?" Ray knew that something was wrong by the tone in your voice, dropping what he was doing and pressing the phone to his chest to muffle the sound of him talking, then tapping Mickey on the shoulder.

"I got to go boss, stuff at home needs my attention." He knew Mickey would let him go, and with a soft smile and a nod from his boss, he was off. He lifted the phone to his ear, caught between asking what was wrong there and then and waiting until you were safe in his arms so you could speak without the stress of people around you. "I'll be there before you know it, just hang tight."

He almost sped, having promised you he wouldn't put himself at risk on your behalf when it came to something small. When he got there you weren't waiting outside, rather he could see you at the front desk in a heated conversation with a customer.

He parked the car and walked in, calming down when he saw you relax at the sight of him. He walked behind the counter and looped his arm around your waist, ignoring the irate man in front of him. "You're closed, what's he doing here?" The man deflated, he clearly had an idea of who Raymond was.

"He wasn't happy with his order, I've told him a million times that ingredients vary but he won't listen." Raymond turned to him, his face impassive but unwavering.

"Pay her and leave you or I'll make you leave, do you understand me?" His voice was calm, his tone filled with authority. The man nodded, throwing the cash on the table then racing out. "You wanna head home?"

You nodded, "please, I feel gross."

He hung your coats on their hooks when you got inside, dropping down to remove your shoes then standing up and pulling you into his arms, "you wanna tell me what happened? There's no way your feel like this after just one dickhead."

You sighed, "I've just been putting our fires all day long, I'm exhausted from all the fucking thinking. The day started with some of the kids from the private school up the road coming in and taking up all my time asking stupid questions, they didn't buy anything and did it just to take up my time and I couldn't tell them to leave because their parents would ruin me. And then a delivery didn't come and I had to sort that, then that asshole this afternoon. I've had it."

He took your face in his hands and looked into your eyes, "go and have a long, hot shower, I'll put out your favourite set of PJs then put dinner on. You won't have to think for the rest of the night." You smiled, already feeling the stress of the day melt away.

"Thank you Ray, I love you so much." He smiled, dropping his forehead onto yours.

"I love you too, now go and bathe, you'll feel better once you've had some time to yourself."

****

You could hear Ray getting your night clothes ready as you washed the day away, your muscles relaxing as the scent of your soap filled the steamy air. You stood under the stream until you felt comfortable in your skin again before getting out and drying off. You took the time to apply lotion to your skin and then slipped into your PJs and headed downstairs.

You could smell something wonderful coming from the kitchen, "what's for dinner my love?" Ray slung the tea towel over his shoulder and walked over to you, wrapped his arms around your body while he pressed his face into your hair. "Your favourite, plus chocolate lava cakes." You smiled and spun in his arms, pressing your face into his chest.

"I am one lucky woman." He smiled and pressed a kiss to your forehead.

"It will be ready in a moment love, go and sit at the table and I'll bring it over." You did as he asked, sitting in your spot next to Raymond's at the long dining table in the middle of the room. He was there with the plates a few minutes later, setting one down in front of you and plopping himself down in his seat before placing his free hand on your leg.

"Eat up, you'll feel better once you've got something in your stomach." His hand never left your leg during the meal, his thumb running back and forth over the top of your thigh. "Good?"

You nodded, "really really good, thank you Ray."

He smiled, his hand leaving your leg briefly to stroke your cheek, "I'm glad, you ready for dessert?"

"Oh, yes please."

****

After dinner, you moved to the couch to enjoy some trash TV while Raymond rubbed the ache out of your legs, "you feeling any better?"

You shrugged, "a little, I still feel weird."

"Alright, you remember what we did together the last time you felt weird?"

You smiled, and pulled your legs away, moving to sit in his lap, "yeah, I do. Are you saying you want to do that again?"

His voice was gentle as he replied, "of course I do love, do you want to do that again?" You felt your skin get hot as his fingers moved from your cheek to your neck, stroking it so he could feel the thump thump of your pulse under his thumb.

"I would like that very much." He stood up, taking you with him and took your hand, walking you upstairs and into the bedroom. He sat down with you on the bed, your legs touching and linked his fingers with yours. "Would you like to pick the toys for tonight or would you like me to do it?"

You thought for a moment, "can you do it please?" Raymond smiled and stood up, walking over to his huge walk in. You could hear him in the cupboard with all the fun things, he must have known what he was looking for because he was back in a flash and dropping the super fluffy cuffs on the bed.

He went to your bedside table next and pulled out the wand, then checked that it worked before setting it down and coming to sit next to you again, "remind me what you're going to tell me if you want to stop."

"Stop, no, that hurts, the usual."

He smiled, "good girl." He started on your top, running your hands over the uncovered skin until he reached the buttons of your sleep shirt. He went one by one, grazing your bare skin as it was revealed to his eyes. He pushed the shirt off your torso then took your hand and stood up before running his fingertips down your stomach and to the ties of your shorts.

With a tug, the shorts were undone and he pulled them down your legs with your panties in one go, "arms please love." You held them out and Ray took them in one hand while reaching across and picking up the cuffs in the other, he leaned down and kissed your skin before sliding the cuffs over your hands and tightening them over your wrists.

"You good?" You nodded and Ray smiled, "great, lay down and get comfortable for me." You did as he asked, settling down with your head on the pillows while Ray moved to your legs. He gave them the same treatment, kissing your ankles then sliding the cuffs over your feet and tightening them before fastening them to the corners of the bed, "you still comfortable?"

"Yeah, I'm great." He smiled and removed his sweater, leaving him in a comfortable T-shirt and his pants. Ray smiled at you again then his lips found your ankle just above the cuffs, alternating from leg to leg until he reached your inner thigh. He kissed up your stomach and to your breasts, flicking his tongue over your nipples one after the other then to your upper chest and finally your mouth.

The kiss was soft and full of affection, his hand coming up to caress your cheek. He took over quickly, leaving you breathless and desperate. He pulled away, looking into your eyes, "hi."

He smiled down at you, kissing you again before pulling back, "hi love, you ready for more?" You lifted your head and brought your lips to his, Ray indulging you before pulling back just out of your reach, "I'll take that as a yes?"

"Yep, I can't wait." Ray rolled onto his side, reaching over your body to take the vibrator off the table and putting it on the bed between you then he ran his hands over each inch of your skin. He looked into your eyes when his hand reached your core, biting his lip when he found you wet.

"You're so good for me, I haven't done anything yet and you're already soaked." His voice was rough, tumbling over each sound as they came out of his mouth. His fingers were gentle as they moved through your slit, collecting wetness from your entrance to make sweeping circles over your centre.

He came in close, pressing his cheek to yours as he whispered in your ear. "You know love, you're all I thought about all day long. Unlike you, my day was very uneventful so my thoughts wandered, all I could think about was what we were going to do when we got home. I have to say, even though it was under upsetting circumstances, I'm glad you called me, I don't think I could have waited much longer."

You went to reply, your voice stuttering and Ray stopped you, "shhh, you don't need to talk, just let me look after you." You relaxed back into the pillows and Ray smiled, "there you go, now where was I?" His fingers became more insistent, working you up while his voice filled the air again.

"Right, work. We did have a new food truck on the street, I had a fish pie for lunch." Ray noticed how your breath quickened the more he spoke, his thumb found your clit as he slid two fingers inside you, moaning at how wet you were, "my good girl, always so wet for me." He lifted his free hand to your neck, going back to the earlier movement of running his thumb up and down your jugular.

You turned your head, exposing your neck and he took advantage, wrapping his hand around your neck and holding your gaze to his, "what's got you all hot and bothered love?" There was only affection in his tone.

"I like the sound of your voice, it's nice." He smiled and kissed you, then pulled his fingers from your body and picked up the toy, turning it on low and pressing it to your clit. He rocked the wand back and forth, turning it up as he pushed your hips towards him, "so eager, what am I going to do about that?"

You couldn't really think with his huge hand around your neck but you knew he didn't want you to respond. He clicked the wand one last time, turning it up all the way and chuckling as you flinched away from the intense sensation.

He kissed you, waiting until you adjusted to the vibrations before removing his hand from your neck and running his hand down your body. He shifted himself so he could slide two of his thick fingers inside you. You could feel the ridges of his knuckles as he pressed his fingertips to your G-spot.

Then he stopped, "hey, what gives?" He chuckled and kissed the tip of your nose.

"I just wanted to lose the clothes, don't worry, I won't leave you unsatisfied." He rushed to get naked, your eyes raking over his lean muscular body as he took his shirt off then his pants. He stood there is his tight black boxers, looking down at you with a smug smile on his face, "like what you see love?"

"What do ou think?" He shook his head, "yeah, I know what you're thinking." With a wink, he pulled his underpants down and his hard cock sprang free. He climbed back on the bed and onto you, running his hand up the outside of your thigh and back to your centre. "You're going to cum for me and then I'm going to give you my cock, how does that sound?"

You gasped as his lips found yours and his fingers met your flesh again. You moaned into his mouth as you came and then Ray was pulling his fingers away and slamming himself inside you just as the orgasm faded out. He buried his face in your neck, whispering praise into your ear, "my good girl, you're so sensitive for me. What would you like now, do you want the toy or my fingers on you?"

It was hard to respond with pleasure filling your body, "whatever you want." Ray kissed your neck, his beard scratching your skin. He picked up the wand again, flipping it back on and pressing it to your clit, "is that alright love?"

You moaned out a yes and his hips picked up speed, pushing you over the edge one last time before he painted your walls with warmth. "There you go, you feel better now?"

You nodded, your brain foggy. "I'm great, I can't think but I'm great." He chuckled, "that was the point, wasn't it?"

You sighed, "yeah, it was. Can you stay with me for a little while longer, I don't want you to get up yet." Ray smiled and kissed your cheek, moving to free your wrists first, rubbing the stiffness out of the skin before moving to your ankles. He pulled you into his arms and rested your head on his chest, running his hand up and down your arm.

"I'll stay with you for as long as you need but I know you don't like being sticky so I'm going to get up in a bit and get something to clean us up but I'll be right back. How does that sound?"

You sighed, knowing he was right, "sounds good, give me ten minutes?" Ray pressed his lips to your forehead, "that's fine with me."

Fin

#raymond smith #raymond smith x reader #raymond smith x you #charlie hunnam smut #charlie hunnam #the gentlemen #sp's kinkfest pick and mix

[imthedoctortobiasfunke]

wIt now u gotta share the other webkinz grudge

Oh right ok so when I was in elementary school webkinz had just hit the East Coast and had yet to make their way over to us in OR. My grandparents lived in Michigan and heard about this cool new toy for kids so they got me one, a Pegasus webkinz. I thought it was the coolest shit ever and started bringing it to school and getting my friends into it even though you still couldn't buy them where we were.

For a little bit webkinz was just this cool niche thing that only i had and only myself and two friends cared about. Then cut to Christmas or whatever the closest holiday was and two boys in my class get a couple of their own, I think they got dogs. These were the popular boys (of 4th grade) so all of a sudden the whole class, then grade, then school was interested in webkinz and wanted their own, which was cool. What started to piss off little 8yr old me was that people said those boys were the first ones in our school to get webkinz, and if I brought up mine they acted skeptical and condescending. Again this is a 4th grade grudge so it's stupid but wtf guys... I had that Pegasus for WEEKS at school before anyone cared.

Anyways I'm not mad at anyone in particular bc that would be stupid (not that the whole thing isn't) but lil 8yr old me still holds that grudge. Also the Pegasus was discontinued shortly after!! So not only was I the first but I had an exclusive pet!!! Those kids knew nothin

#webkinz #that pizza game was my LIFE #also i loved hunting for gemz

[sadistic-softie]

LORE DUMP ABOUT ME (I'm that bored)

I've been itching to write and also to share information about myself nobody asked for, so why not kill two birds with one stone? This could be considered an autobiography.

I think there was something fundamentally wrong with me from the start. As a child, and I mean in the single digits, I, for lack of better words, didn't give a shit about anyone but me and my family, and I cared much less about my family than the average kid. I found myself constantly annoyed whenever someone was being friendly with me or expressing something I disagreed with or didn't understand. I saw everyone as an annoyance and a lesser person. I was selfish. I hid it though. I would pretend to smile and laugh. Pretend to be interested. Pretend to care. That's how I made friends and got people to give me whatever little things I wanted. Toys, school supplies, food, etc.

If I wanted something I couldn't buy or sweet-talk myself into getting, I would steal it. Only if I knew I would get away with it, though. I didn't feel bad. I didn't feel bad when my friends would cry after I stole their toys. I felt satisfied. I just felt oddly proud. I did that. I caused them to cry and they don't even know it. This likely would have gone on if not for my stepfathers suicide.

I was nine when it happened. It destroyed and traumatized my mother, giving her PTSD, as she found the body. His death made me do nearly a complete 180 in personality. I really had cared about him, and it hurt. I gained the sense of empathy I once lacked and started treating people with a more genuine kindness and appreciation. I loved my friends for real. I felt bad when I stole, so I stopped.

I stopped caring about myself and began to value all other lives over mine, to the point where I thought to myself that if I ever had to sacrifice myself for someone I didn't know, that I would and I should, because they're worth so much more than me. I would constantly put myself in everyones shoes. Constantly wanting to understand them deeply and psycologically. In my head, I was useless if I couldn't aid or protect my family, but I was still so young. This mindset has now proven to be detrimental to my mental development.

As I, my mother was changed significantly by the trauma. She was paranoid about our saftey to the point where she would angirly panic if we did not immediately respond to her or if she heard a loud sound. Over time, she slowly became more and more difficult to please. Every action I took was more and more scrutinized. I began being yelled at and scolded for a lack of intilligence. Being told over and over for years and years that I'm not using my brain, "You're not fucking stupid! I don't know why you act like you are!"

No matter how hard I tried to avoid it, I always ended up being scolded harshly for stupidity. I was doing something innefficiently, I didn't think of something I should have, I didn't know something I was supposed to, I didn't do something I should have thought to do, whatever it was, I was subjected to scoldings of at least 2 hours if clocks were right, though it felt longer, of course. It would be continually bought up again and again in later hours and days and especially in later scoldings, being told, "I don't know what's wrong with you, but you need to find a way to fucking fix it!"

I began a spiral of self-hatred and became desperate to, "get smarter," getting higher and higher grades in school, averaging Bs and As. It didn't help. Reading endless numbers of books and articles and anything I could get my hands on. It didn't help. Doing brain strengtheing activities. Mostly puzzles; solving riddles, crosswords, cryptograms, sudoku, memory games, etc. It didn't help. I contiued doing everything I could think of, obsessively, in desperation to stop being so stupid, but it never got any better. It only got worse.

I just wanted to stop failing her. Stop disappointing her. Stop being subjected to that look in her eyes that made my heart sink into my gut, the voice that stung my ears, and the words that dampened my eyes and cheeks. It was all impossible. I spent the rest of my time with her, roughly ten years, overworking myself to try and avoid it, but it only continued getting worse.

I had to learn how to shut my feelings back off. Force myself into a blank state around her. It didn't prevent what she did, but lessened the chances of it enough to be worth it. I could show nothing but calm joy or neutrality. Never get caught crying, never be sad, never be angry, be quiet, remain calm, never laugh without a good excuse to laugh, and most importantly, don't show that you're afraid. If I did any of those things, life was so so much worse.

When I turned 12, I began to develop intense and vivid intrusive thoughts that were exclusively violent and homocidal. They went against my nature of caring about others over myself and caused me so much distress that, by 13, I attempted. Tried to drown myself in the tub via waterboarding with a towel. Freaked out and quit when I got really desperate for air. Mom never found out. The strangest thing about it though, was that the more I loved a person, the more frequent and violent my intrusive thoughts about them were. My best friend was the one I though of in this way the most.

I thought of violent tricks, mutilation, stabbing, dismemberment, torture, staged accidents, cannibalism, burning alive, poisoning, drowning, and many other violent things one could do to another. I didn't understand why. Regardless, I had a mental breakdown and confessed my intrustive thoughts. Because my mom was scared for my saftey and didn't know what to do with me, I was temporarily sent away to live in a large building with other teens who had various mental illnesses.

We were on suicide watch. Constant survailance. Reinforced windows that couldn't open. Bedrooms with six beds. Staff watched us sleep. Every activity and meal was monitored. I was at peace, but after a month, I became restless. Therapy sessions were too frequent. I had no privacy. I wasn't allowed my hobbies because pencils were not allowed. There were no books to read either. Everything there was so boring. All I got to do was watch awful childrens shows, listen to clean karaoke sessions, and watch people play "Just Dance." I felt like I was getting worse.

Luckily, I got to go back home. Those days, I got about an hour alone in the house after school. I used it to cry and scream. The thoughs subsided at 15. At 18, my best friends betrayed, spread rumors about, and abandoned me. I won't go into too much about what they did because it hurts too much, but it was the most traumatic period of time in my life. One of the friends was also an ex I'm still not over. Everything with my mother continued and kept getting worse.

Still had to hide all my feelings. You have no excuse to be sad! I give you everything and you have nothing to worry about! Being blamed for things out of my control, never being able to be enough, overworking myself, feeling guilty for resting, being insulted, talked down to, and threatened. So tired. I noticed my pet rabbit lost a significant and dangerous ammount of weight when I was away on vacation with my father. When I came back and saw her, I had to shut the door because I had started to cry. She was noticably lighter and I could feel all her bones. Yeah, I told the kids to take care of her. I did notice this morning she'd lost some weight. It had never been so hard to hold back my anger.

This mental pain went on and on until I reached a breaking point. My mom had had one of her breakdowns due to work stress and my innability to help her well enough and ran away from home for the night. I thought, This is my only chance. She's never away. If I don't do something now, I'm going to kill myself later. I couldn't take it any more. I felt trapped. I just couldn't let my family suffer through another suicide. I called several crisis lines over and over. I called 988 as well.

All they wanted besides to talk me down was get DCF involved. Fucking mandated reporters, of course. They don't understand nuance. They see only "good" and "bad". The see my mom as some evil, irrideemable monster, and me as some sort of damsel in distress. From experience with a close call, I knew better. The day DCF called my mother was a terrifying day. It was't even about her. It was about a neighborhood case, yet she still lashed out. DCF rarely ever helps anybody, I've heard. It makes things worse, if anything. It's a dangerous trap that would destroy my family. I wouldn't let them do that. I didn't let myself share too much.

I gave up on 988 and the crisis lines and called my father instead. I told him everything. He said he knew this was coming. That she was always like that. That it was why they divorced. I didn't know what to believe, but I felt safe every time I was over there, and they treat me with respect and humanity. I took the chance, packed my shit, and I'm living with him now. Safe. Healing slowly. And I took my best friend with me. The one I trust more than anyone. My beloved rabbit. I will see to it that she never starves again.

#tw violent imagery #tw violent thoughts #tw violence #tw violent language #family trauma #trauma #tw trauma #tw sui ideation #tw sui talk #tw sui attempt #tw sucidal ideation #tw intrusive thoughts #mental illness #tw mental illness #animal neglect #tw animal neglect

[the-firebird69]

Me: “can I take your picture?” Joker and Batman:

And I'm not really a man can I get a real picture what do you say is this beautiful way out of line and that's us and he knows why it's just hard to survive and scary and it's horrible and we're at each other and it's stupid s*** especially the pseudo empire that's the worst thing I've ever seen and you're out there fighting he doesn't want you doing that so he doesn't get captured but I guess if heated it up during a time of mass of war is he let he says have to think about that. But here it is we're doing the Halloween thing it's kind of and we're going to have a lot of fun. We're wondering if he wants to be the f-117 pilot and he said the flight suits are like ancient and they kind of are they should have some kind of gear a little hard tack. And it would make our day but it look old it's like a war two vest or something strange. And the car is going to be awesome both of them and the toy and Batman will probably get one not to fight him and I won't be able to see him

The joker as seen here

We have to have a fight apparently but it's fake as for promotion and it was for the movie and we are in Hollywood and we're doing this and people are filming and taking pictures it works pretty damn good what he did with the pictures of the f-111 f-17 was awesome and people are going to do it he's going to buy these kits and they're going to build these and they want to see the kid today

True too people are going to copy the kids but it needs to be mid-engine and to do that you have to buy the kit and those parts are going to be unique he says and strong and was reinforcing with reinforcing and your friend might not copy the whole thing and we know how that goes it's going to be plenty of that it's going to be a pain in the ass all sorts of CDs it's going to be really funny so I can order my kit as soon as I hear about it and what this is going to be a strange vehicle so fast nothing goes that fast I can't wait

Batman I seen here and yes me Daniel

This is what our boys are up to and it's good they should be he's trying to find out what to be for Halloween and that stymied already everything's too small and a small people we're not that small this is ridiculous I can't fit into any of my old suits they're all too big for me and he's 5'9 and he used to be 5 ft 11 it's pitiful but he's huge now he was not that big

Mac Daddy we talked to the boys and they said if they look like that when they're young and he's going to be tremendous he's got the signs of being huge and some of it's in the hands and he said it's when he makes a fist you can see it it's a little like him but his face are huge on the on the top of the fist and just some other features his shoulders are gigantic people are commenting too and say it's mutating it's the turtle and it's supposed to be

[just-a-fly]

I don't know what's wrong with me

But I know that something is wrong with me.

You know that relative or an ex of your friend that you know is a shitty person?

They're abusive to their kids, cheat and lie to their partners, they're selfish to no end.

I have two people in my life who are like this.

My grandmother and my aunt.

My grandmother is a capricious woman who never took care of her daughter and abused her son severely.

She would throw tantrums every night whenever my grandfather came home.

She left her daughter at her mother's place and never came back.

She abused and ruined her son's love life, making him bound to be in horrible relationships with awful women.

My aunt is no better. She left her daughter to her mother too, never caring for the child whatsoever.

She never seems to find love because she's unbearable to be with.

These two women are examples of people who are just shitty.

Shitty people out there to ruin people's lives.

I think I'm one of those shitty people.

Shitty people don't necessarily need to commit war crimes.

Shitty people is that dickhead bully in your school.

A nasty teacher that hates everyone.

A boss who is heartless and cold and doesn't care if you broke your bones, you need to come at 9 tomorrow.

Shitty person is a person who does shitty things to people. And I'm one of them.

Ever since I was little I was always aware of the fact that I'm extremely capricious and throw tantrums whenever I don't get things my way.

I wanted a toy and mom couldn't afford it. What would I do?

I would yell and scream, fall to the ground, throw my feet in the air, and demand mom buys me the toy or else she's a horrible mother who doesn't love me.

My poor mother would relent and buy me the goddamn toy even if it broke her bank.

Even if I didn't ask for anything or didn't need anything I still found a way to throw a tantrum.

My favorite move was to scream at mom she doesn't love me and then threaten to leave home.

I was 12 when I would pull this move and at this point, my mother would be too tired to entertain my antics and tell me "do as you wish".

I remember sitting in my car and being emotional over something I don't even remember.

I screamed at her that I hated her and that she was an awful mother. My mother just looked out the road, tears on her face, and whispered "am I really that horrible?".

My mother, who wasn't even responsible for how I felt at that moment, had to hear her grumpy daughter berate her just because she can.

I realized what I said and felt horrible. I wanted to say sorry but felt that a simple apology was not enough.

I didn't apologize and never did anything to show I was sorry.

I just waddled in my self-hatred and acted like nothing happened around my mom.

My sister would never throw such tantrums.

She was very loving to our parents. She always said nice things to them and compromised when needed.

Even though I made it so difficult for my parents to not pick favorites, they never did.

My parents loved me and my sister all the same.

We were both equally loved.

And yet despite no trauma in life, I'm still like this.

I'm still a capricious child who throws tantrums every time things don't go my way.

I was 14, not an adult but certainly old enough to not throw tantrums.

My family got an apartment during that time and my parents decided that I should stay in the bigger bedroom among the two bedrooms for kids the apartment had.

I threw a tantrum around that ordeal because, unlike the smaller room that my sister got, my room didn't have a bathroom.

I had screamed at my parents to let me have the room with the bathroom but my father told me no and that was final.

After my outburst I couldn't step foot in my room for a good week because of the guilt I felt about my outburst.

I felt stupid screaming over something so insignificant.

But I did because I'm just shitty like that.

My recent tantrums happened at university.

My first tantrum in my first semester happened because I felt angry at my father.

I never liked my father and I always preferred my mother.

You see, my father was absent during my childhood.

He was too busy working and trying to support us, and by the end of the day, he was too tired to engage with his kids.

My hatred for my father grew as I got older.

Not only was he an emotionally absent father who couldn't attend my high school graduation, but he wasn't that great of a husband either.

My mother would get sick and my father, instead of helping her get better, would just leave to work or stay at home and expect her to cook for him and clean up after him.

Every time my mother left to hang out with her friends, my father would throw a tantrum, calling her to come home so that she cooked for him already.

His anger extended onto me and my sister and he would force me to cook for him.

He would barge into our rooms, scream at us for being selfish and then drag me to the kitchen counter to cook for him.

I remember the words he said to me when he would shout "You're just like your mother, just using me for my money".

I didn't know how to cook since my mother did all the cooking and cleaning. She took the grunt of the housework and never pressured me and my sister to do anything.

I was around 10 to 12 when all of this transpired. I'm still left scared of his voice.

But besides the outbursts, he was a calm man.

Every time I'd throw a tantrum he would instantly relent and do as I say.

I said no and that was the law in his mind.

He would bend over backward to try to appease me to stop my tantrums.

I would always get what I wanted at the end of the ordeal.

But back to my father's outburst.

After that whole ordeal, I stopped loving my father.

Every day whenever he would come home from work he expected all of us: me, my sister, and my mom to greet him at the door with a peck on the cheek.

When I was 14 our relatives came to our house and they decided to crash in my room.

My parents offered me to sleep with them and I agreed to do so.

I slept in between my parents and promptly fell asleep.

I woke up at night feeling something on my body.

Someone was touching my body.

His hand was groping my breast and his other hand was trying to grab onto my vulva.

I pushed him away from me but he never stopped.

I left the bed and went to my parent's bathroom.

I remember looking down at the floor and feeling like I needed to vomit.

I checked my phone to see what time it was and it was 3 am.

I went back to my parent's bed and lay next to my mom, avoiding my dad.

Next morning he told my mother that my body is great and that my boobs are bigger than hers.

I wanted to cry when I heard those words from my mother as she chuckled.

From that day onward I couldn't love him.

I decided to not greet him at the door with a peck on the cheek, instead just sitting in my room and pretending to sleep.

That trick didn't fly past him as he had another outburst directed at me.

He told me that I didn't love him and that I was ungrateful. Both of which are true.

I didn't love him and I am ungrateful.

My grades weren't great and my Korean sucked, even though I'm half Korean from my father's side.

He drilled into the fact that I didn't even study at all and that I didn't even try to learn Korean.

He made me apologize and I started greeting him at the door not because I loved him but because I was scared.

I graduated high school and went to Korea to study, a decision I didn't make out of love for my ancestry.

My mother decided that me and my sister go study in Korea because we barely knew the language there.

She said we needed to learn our mother tongue so that we could at least talk to our relatives.

I could care less about learning Korean.

Originally I wanted to go to Sweden, to study architecture there. Then I wanted to go to Italy or Switzerland. I wanted Europe, not Korea.

But now that I was studying in Seoul in my first semester I threw a tantrum at my father specifically.

My mom wanted me to have amicable feelings towards my dad, to love him.

I remember her calling me about it and I lost it.

I blocked her and my dad on all social media and decided to not talk to them unless they apologized.

I wanted my father to apologize for sexually harassing me and I wanted my mom to say sorry for standing up for him, not me.

I started to despise the fact that my mom came in defense of my dad, saying that he used to touch his mother the same way and that sexual touches mean nothing to him if family is involved.

I hated the fact that she decided that her husband is more important than me, her daughter.

I unblocked them after they screamed at me for being selfish and I apologized crying.

I still feel resentment.

And now in my second year, I throw tantrums again.

My father promised to buy me a laptop during winter break.

Not only did he not buy me a laptop but he also didn't send me and my sister our monthly allowance.

He didn't have the money yet and some people back in Mongolia owed him some.

I threw a tantrum again because he promised a laptop.

Despite having no money, he relented. Agreeing to buy me a laptop, but at this point, I felt guilty about asking anything and throwing a tantrum.

It's not the laptop's lacking CPU that triggered me, but the unkept promise of a laptop, something I so badly need, literally, to pass my digital design course next semester.

It seems like I can't stand when things don't go my way and I wonder why.

Why can't I just be happy about life and be grateful like my sister?

Why do I feel jealous every time my sister outdoes me?

Why do I feel such burning hatred for my mother's figure? Why is she thinner than me?

Why am I capable of being jealous of my most beloved people and why am I capable of being so illogical with my anger?

It seems I'm just like my aunt and grandma in that I'm capable of hating even those whom I love with all my beating heart.

It seems like I'm just a person who can't love anyone as much as I love my shitty self.

I asked my mother if she ever felt jealous of the people she loved and she said she could never do that.

I asked my sister the same question and she answered she couldn't even imagine feeling jealous of me.

I know for a fact that if she ever becomes thinner than me I'll start resenting her. I know the moment her GPA is higher than mine I'll resent her.

I know I only love her as long as she's below me. As long as I outshine her.

Why is my love so conditional?

Why can't I love wholeheartedly like my sister?

Why can't I just love my parents despite my father's outburst?

Why can my sister love our parents and our dad despite being on the receiving end of his hurtful comments too?

Why am I incapable of feeling happy when my friends do good on tests, always comparing myself to them in my head as I congratulate them?

Why am I such an awful girlfriend to my exes?

Emotionally abused my first ex by telling him he was worthless and meant nothing to me whenever I felt like his attention was not 1000% on me,

Or blatantly flirting with my first ex right in front of my then-boyfriend.

Why can't I be a good person who doesn't hurt those around her?

Why do I have to berate my friend's every move, and make her feel stupid for every breath she makes just because we don't agree politically on things?

Why am I such a shitty person?

And why am I so aware of my shitty behavior?

No matter how much I feel guilt, I know I will act just the same as before because this toxic trait of mine is who I am, it's part of me.

This is who I am and this is my main personality.

Unlike my grandmother and my aunt, I'm self-aware.

I'm self-aware of my shit and my toxic hatred for everyone who opposes me and who is better than me.

But what's good in being self-aware if all I do is wallow in it, let it consume me, as I do nothing to change myself.

Because I know that this is who I am and there's nothing I can do about it.

You cannot mold your feelings and emotions.

You can't just stop your thoughts.

Even if I do nice things once in a while, I do them not out of place for love, not out of place for kindness, but out of place to try to trick myself into believing that I can be good. Only if I know that what I'm doing is good and that will stroke my ego.

Even when I got a call from my friend's boyfriend, telling me that she was unconscious in her lab my first thought was "ugh, why the fuck is she making herself collapse in her lab? She's ruining my fucking day".

As I walked to the lab with my sister, I was filled with excitement. Excitement in knowing I was about to be her hero and save her. Excitement in knowing I'll do something good.

I saw her lying on the floor and was too scared to call the ambulance. My sister, despite being extremely mysophobic, tried to lift her even if she was covered in vomit.

I, a non mysophobic person, couldn't stand touching her.

The ambulance came and I was shaken.

I've never seen paramedics up close but they gave me anxiety.

Sitting in the ambulance, and staying in the hospital with her roommate till 4 am gave me such an ego boost.

For once I was doing something nice for someone.

For once I could claim credit for me being such an amazing friend.

Even though her roommates called the ambulance, came running to her lab and one joined her in the emergency care unit.

I felt slightly irritated at her roommate for staying with her inside the care unit while I and her other roommate had to sit inside the reception of the hospital.

I wanted to be near her so I could be the sole hero.

But alas, none of my "heroic" actions were truly heroic. As they all served the purpose to boost my ego.

I'm not a good person and I'll never be capable of any kind of love towards anyone but myself and I'm so awfully self-aware it hurts.

No matter what I do I'm just a shitty person and there's something wrong with me.

#vent tag #vent

[danurso]

The little witch and the noodle

Many years ago, Irina arc got sick with an incurable disease, and to save her life, her husband goes to a witch living in the forest. A deal is made on that day, and in exchange of saving his wife's life, he would hand over his first son once he reaches maturity.

On the present day, Jaune is celebrating his eighteenth birthday with his father, mother and sisters, and in the middle of the party, a black fog covers the area and the witch shows up to take her part of the deal.

Alexander: You can't do that!

Witch: Of course I can, we made a deal, remember?

Jaune: What is she talking about dad?

Witch: Your father promised to give me his first male child once he reached maturity age in exchange for your mother's life.

Alexander: Then take me instead! I'll give you my life, my body and my soul if you want! Just don't take my son!

Witch: Too late for that, you're not the one I need.

Alexander: *standing in front of jaune* Wait! Please! I beg you! Kill ME if you want! but leave my son alive!

Witch: ......wait, you think i'm gonna kill him?

Alexander: ......you're not?

Witch: Of course not! Geez, do people still believe in those stupid stories of witches that use animal limbs to make potions and eat people to stay young?

Alexander: You don't do that?

Witch: OF COURSE NOT!!!

Alexander: Then why do you want my son?

Witch: To gift him as a husband to my daughter.

Pyrrha: *runs in* MOM!

Jaune: Pyrrha!?

Witch: Hello sweetie, I was just talking about you.

Pyrrha: WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

Witch: Getting you your husband. That's the boy you're always talking about, right? The one with soft blonde hair, pretty blue eyes and cute goofy smile?

Pyrrha: *red* MOOOM!!!

Jaune: *blushes*

Pyrrha: You can't do that! You can't force anyone to do that!

Witch: Of course I can! That's the deal. I saved his mother, Now I own him, and he's my gift to you.

Pyrrha: You can't do something like that!

Alexander: Yes! My son need to have the right to cho-

Irina: *pushing jaune towards the witch.*

Jaune: Mom!?

Alexander: W-wait, what are you doing!?

Irina: A deal is a deal dear! You can't go back on it!

Alexander: Are you really going to force our son to do that!?

Irina: Force him? Take a good look at that girl! You think our son is going to be sad marrying all of that!?

Alexander: It's not about that! It's about-

Irina: Shut up! He already likes her, he just didn't realize yet because the stupid genes he got from you!

Jaune: *red* w-what?

Alexander: WHAT!? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!?

Irina: Oh for the love of god Alexander! You only asked me out on our second high school year!

Alexander: It took me a year! So what!? Its not that big of a deal!

Irina: I WAS CRUSHING ON YOU SINCE WE WERE FIVE YOU DENSE MORON!!!

Alexander: . . . . . . . .

Irina: AND I'M NOT LETTING THIS POOR GIRL GO THROUGH THE SAME!!! *pushes jaune against pyrrha* NOW GO OUT AND MAKE ME SOME GRANDBABIES!!!

Jaune: *red* MOM!!!

Pyrrha: *redder* . . . . .

Witch: . . . .i like your wife alexander.

Irina: And you! You can keep my kid, but the grandkids are mine too!

Witch: Fair enough. But I'm gonna buy the clothes, and name the first baby.

Irina: Then I'll get the toys, the crib, and name the second.

Witch: *shakes her hand* Pleasure doing business with you, irina arc.

Irina: The pleasure is mine, miss nikos.

Jaune: *deadpans* Did my mom really sell me for grandbabies?

Pyrrha: Y-you don't have to go through with this! I can talk with my mom about it and-

Jaune: N-no, it's okay.

Pyrrha: Really!? *Pink* i-i mean, really?

Jaune: Yeah, I'm just shocked my mom would make it that easy, b-but. . . .*red* it's not a bad deal to be honest, if you're okay with it.

Pyrrha: Of course! I. . .i don't mind it at all. . .

Jaune: cool. . . .

Pyrrha: cool . . . .

Jaune: *red* . . . . .

Pyrrha: *red* . . . . .

Irina: Dear, you're being awfully adorable right now, but I would like it more if you already left to consolidate your marriage.

Witch: If you two are still feeling too shy about it, I have an aphrodisiac potion that will fix that in a second.

Irina: Do you have potions for fertility too?

Witch: What kind of mother would I be if I didn't have some?

Jaune: You think we should. . .

Pyrrha: Run away?

Jaune: Yep. *Grabs her hand and runs away*

Pyrrha: *blushes but follows*

Irina/Witch: *on the chase* GET BACK HERE AND START MAKING US GRANDBABIES!!!

Alexander: . . . . .saphron

Saphron: Yes?

Alexander: Please don't ever make a deal with a Witch.

Saphron: *holding a baby with terra's hair and skin tone but with marine blue eyes* Yeah, a bit too late for that pops.

Alexander: *facepalms*

#rwby #jaune arc #pyrrha nikos #jaune x pyrrha #jaune arc x pyrrha nikos #rwby arkos #arkos #saphron cotta arc

[dolugecat]

On some Japanese social issues I had learned about at uni and abroad):

(Rb ok!)

Legit had an epiphany about the true hidden meaning of the last arc of Mob Psycho 100. It’s hella projection but for real there is nothing neurotypical about Mob or Mob Psycho. I do not wish to enforce my interpretation on others (ironic bc I do that all the time but this is a serious social theory). There are some interesting and very sad social issues in Japan that the west really doesn’t understand but would I think help people understand a lot of context behind not only Mob Psycho, but also a lot of other anime. I learned this at my shitty university (prestigious but horrific) and while studying abroad in Japan and talking with Japanese peers. Get ready here we go (and tw for bullying and darker things):

Unfortunately in East Asian education systems, bullying can be extremely intense. Growing up I assumed it was over exaggerated extremely in anime for drama but it really can be so horrific. From what I’ve heard, there is often a single kid or so who is just shit on by everyone else, even the teacher. Mogami land *is* the reality of some Japanese kids. I’ve read that in Korea, this social punching bag sometimes is just the darkest skinned person (yayyy colorism /angry) and or someone who does not fit in. I mean, we have that in America too, but maybe not as common for the bullying to be as focused on one misfit rather than several. These kids just can’t escape the stigma too, kids from other schools find out they were a major victim at their old school and it starts anew. Thus there is so much stigma and incentive to join in on bullying so you aren’t the one. Sadly, this also ofc leads to higher suicide rates. That’s where the “shoe on building roof” anime trope comes in, bc somehow taking off shoes is relayed to death (I forgot why sorry)

There is a difference in how intense in general high school vs college is too. In the West, commonly college is the more intense curriculum and is harder than high school, but in Japan it’s usually the opposite. Grind suuuupppeeerrrr hard for entrance exams (huge standardized tests that determines what college you can qualify to) bc unlike the ACT or SAT here, that test is by far the most important factor for college admission. Then chill and relax a bit in college. Can’t relate. Name and prestige is very critical for job application, more important than here. That’s why planning out your future is sooo much more intense for Japanese high schoolers than in America, and why there is sooo much more pressure to excel in high school than here. Japanese school years and holidays are done different than ours, I’d suggest looking it up.

Social prestige of going to an American high school or college is nuts. Like whyyy do you value our shitty education, Japan’s is much higher quality (it’s bc we neo colonized them). Being able to speak English is very, very highly valued and any association with Americans make you cooler. From my experience, some Japanese students got very excited to practice speaking English with us, and their biggest issues with learning it is pronunciation, lmao. Wasai english is unique slang that is indeed English words but it’s kinda different and it’s kinda jarring to remember lol. So, Teru having parents that are working overseas isn’t too uncommon, idk about leaving him absolutely alone, but I did have a ex-friend who just came from Japan in middle school who’s situation probably wasn’t too far off from that. Empty wealth with no love, it’s no wonder those kind of people can end up being huge bullies (minori?)

I did a presentation on 引きこもり(hikikomori) for which means “shut in”, (like Serizawa) and it’s fucked up. It’s a social phenomena where according to some Japanese researchers a mix of undisciplined parenting, guilt/not living up to expectations, and hopelessness makes an alarming amount of youth/ young adults literally never go out side their house/room. Often a parent is “enabling” the behavior by supporting them, but idk the articles seemed a bit victim-blaming to me when I read it, but I don’t think I should make a judgement too hard, not my place. I will say I do suspect and believe I read something to support that ASD might play a role in hikikomoris (there is pitiful resources for autistic people in Asia, much much less support than even here, to the point I don’t think most know it exists). Like come on, with the other points I laid out my personal opinion as an Asian American with autism is that it really seems it’s unknowing ableism against autistic classmates, but I didn’t grow up in Asia so I don’t want to say.

Mental health in general is tragically quite abysmal in Japan, and with it being so hyper competitive and brutal work culture, it’s no surprise birth rate in Japan is so low; some Japanese young adults say it seems unethical to bring a life to such hostile world. Suicide rate is of the highest in the world. It’s fucked, I’ve interacted with some of the locals in Tokyo and they were so nice, but the business men just looked dead inside, it’s so sad.

Relationships between child and parent is also strained bc of this intense work and school culture. Quality time is too scarce when you gotta work so much. And the pressure from parents to do well in education or else you might end up socially stigmatized is rough. Bc your job is who you are, it’s hyper capitalism (thanks us for making them do this)

With autism being so unknown, support for parents in raising autistic kids is almost nonexistent. What happens if the “darker” side of ASD shows up in kids? I used to be a menace when I had meltdowns, I felt so bad but really just became so indiscriminately violent. See where this is going? Legit, I think ESP is a sort of metaphor for neurodivergance to ONE. There is so much stigma around it, and even less way for kids to understand why they are different than the others. My Korean family can’t admit we all got ASD, too much fear and internalized shame.

I got finally diagnosed with ASD as an adult and I’ll tell ya, I relate too much to Mob hurting Ritsu. I felt so bad, but also not in control, I knew what I was doing but not how to stop. Luckily, is was blessed in that my hyperfixations involved science and logic, so I did well at school. Sadly, our boy Mob just don’t got the passion or ability to do well at school. His kanji is very bad, even to point of not being confident he wrote a kanji (世) they learn when they are 9, in elementary school (thanks @katyatalks). Him being a bit berated by his parents for having bad grades and bending spoons seems harsh to Westerners I think, but IMO it’s pretty tame from what I’ve seen of some Asian parents (I get to say that lmao). Ofc, however the shaming is very real and Mob just agreeing with them about how weird and stupid he thinks he is so sad. There is even more pressure for the eldest to be better than here, I feel from some interactions. Nonetheless, it’s implied Mob is quite emotionally detached from his parents, even though he loves them, which also adds to his emotional complex. Combined with originally fragile self esteem and feelings of worthlessness, we got one emotionally stunted boy. However, contrary to common belief people with ASD are sometimes hyper empathic and experience emotions very intensely. We are prone to having “meltdowns” which if not assisted with can be quite violent if very intense. For me, my worse meltdowns as a kid came from when I didn’t understand why I wasn’t getting what I wanted, it seemed selfish and cruel of me but I couldn’t control it. I wanted to be a good kid, so why did hit my moms leg at target when she refused to buy me Pokémon toys? I couldn’t come up with a good reason for why my mind just commanded my body to do bad things, just a single thought was controlling me, I want I want I want I want I want ____. Which I argue could be what ???% represents… bc well…. Yeah….. hmm….. not in control of self (mob unconscious), selfish (not actually, I’ve forgave myself but my “normal” kid self was so ashamed), destructive, hurt family, wanting to stop but can’t, that’s kind of…. Too relatable.

But legit, since realizing my new HC, I’ve started to think of the last chapter of mp100 when I “explode” and it helps me feel better and I do gain “control” a bit easier. I don’t feel so bad anymore either, Mob!

#mp100 #mob psycho 100 #my post #mp100 headcanons #welcome to my hc #asd #autism #actually autistic #kageyama shigeo #mob #mp100 meta #Japanese society #japanese culture #meta #mp100 analysis