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turtletaubwrites · 1 day

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Numbers Game ~ Part 24

Pairings: Cross Guild x Fem!Reader x Shanks

Numbers Game Masterlist

Word Count: 4295

Ao3 Link

Ongoing Series Playlist: Youtube Music Link | Youtube Link

Summary: The party has started, but you are adrift. Can you keep pretending with proof of your lovers' betrayal standing before you?

Author's Note: ⚫ !! IMPORTANT TW !! ⚫ We have had quite a bit of blood and pain in this story so far, but this chapter contains the use of a knife during sex. I have bracketed that section off with these symbols ~~~⚫⚫⚫~~~ and you won't miss the story if you skip it! There's aftercare and more smut after that section, so PLEASE DO NOT READ if self harm, knives, or blood may be triggering for you. EXTRA NOTE: This series is about villains, and was always meant to have blood and violence. I won't be able to section off everything, but I know how triggering a scene like this one can be. Please skip it, and know that you are not alone!! 💜

Alternate POV Symbols:

!!! SPOILER WARNING !!! Fic contains spoilers for the end of the Wano arc

Rating/Warnings: Author May Choose to Exclude some Warnings to Avoid Spoilers for Certain Chapters, Explicit Sexual Content, 18+ ONLY, MDNI, AFAB!Reader, She/Her Pronouns for Reader, Reader-Insert, Use of Y/N, Dark Content, Blood & Violence, PTSD, Panic Attacks, Dissociation, Grief, Swearing, Alcohol, Cigars, Smut, Fluff, Angst, Guilt, Drama, Jealousy, Manipulation, Pet Names, Power Imbalance, Cross Guild boys are VILLAINS, Possessive Behavior, Teasing, Threats, Size Difference, Daddy Kink, Masturbation, Blowjobs, Inappropriate Use of Akuma no Mi | Devil Fruit Powers, Shameless Shameless Smut, Pain Kink, Knifeplay, Blood Kink, Other Additional Tags to Be Added

~~~~~~

“I don’t believe you were on the guest list, Mr. Sylvad.”

Mihawk’s cold, dangerous voice didn’t make sense. Lies. Pretend.

They sold me.

“My apologies,” Uncle Cedrick charmed. Your body turned to ice while he held your hand limply, as if he’d forgotten you were there. “Ambassador Siggins was called away for a last minute family emergency, and he was gracious enough to offer me his ticket. I’ve been looking forward to visiting with my dear niece, and meeting her esteemed employers. Perhaps we can share a nightcap after the party? I’d love to–”

“Get your fucking hands off of her.”

Some wicked part of you felt a thrill at the sight of Uncle Cedrick’s eyes going wide with fear. Your body and mind hadn’t decided on what to feel, or trust, or give a fuck about anymore, but you instinctively put yourself between your uncle, and the seemingly furious ex-warlord whose hook was inching closer to him.

“Don’t make a scene. They’ll all turn on you, and you’ll never make another berry for the rest of your lives.”

You felt the violent stillness from both of the domineering forms at your sides, but neither moved.

“Always so shrewd, niece,” Uncle winked, his breath shifting back to his confident ease. “Besides, you know I never travel without insurance. If I’m not back safe on my ship to make a certain call at a certain time, then my location will be leaked to sooo many friends. You know my friends, don’t you, smarty?”

“I know,” you breathed, voice low while you fought to swallow every horrible feeling flooding your body.

“Of course you do,” he gloated, pulling his hand away before touching your face when he glanced at the men beside you. “You were always so smart. See you inside, dear.”

“Rabbit–”

“Sweetheart–”

“Don’t cause a scene.”

~~~~~~

~~~⏰🗡️🔴⏰~~~

“Was it really necessary to cause a scene? The other tavern had much better wine.”

“I didn’t cause the scene,” Shanks smirked, leaning in close while he teased. “I just beat up the asshole that did. No one messes with my friends… Besides, if you drink enough of the cheap shit, it gets the job done.”

Shanks laughed when Mihawk rolled his eyes in a very different way than he planned on making him later. He walked his fingers across the bar, but the swordsman pulled his hand away before they touched.

“Well, Red Hair,” he challenged, a tiny smirk making Shanks’ breath catch, “how many bottles will you be bringing up to the room? How many will get the job done?”

“How many can you carry,” Shanks rasped, eyes glued to that pretty mouth.

~~~

Shanks was grinning.

Mihawk was trying not to.

How many years? How many times had they ended up like this?

And how many more times would he fucking beg for it?

“Please, daddy,” Mihawk whined, “need…”

“Tell me,” Shanks chuckled, digging his nails into Mihawk’s skin while he gripped his face. “What does my slutty, little boy need, huh? You gonna be a greedy whore? Gonna beg me to do so many, filthy things to you?”

“Please–”

“Knew it, you selfish brat,” Shanks scolded, shoving the side of Mihawk’s face against the wall. “What are you gonna give Daddy in return?”

“Everything, please,” Mihawk begged. He tore off his clothes while Shanks kept his face pinned, these moments with the red haired pirate being the only times he didn’t give a fuck about where his clothes landed. “Take everything, daddy, take–”

“Such a desperate whore for me,” Shanks hummed, an evil grin on his face as he released the other man from his grip. “Tell me what you want, and I might be nice. If I think you deserve it.”

Mihawk’s eyes rolled back, the wicked promise in Shanks’ voice giving him so much pleasure and comfort, he didn’t know what to do with it. He fell to his knees, pleading.

~~~⚫⚫⚫~~~

“Make me bleed,” he begged, pulling a knife from his pile of pretty clothes. “Please, daddy. Take my blood, let me–”

“My little freak,” Shanks huffed a laugh, following his friend to his knees. “How would you live without me?”

“I– fuck!”

“My pretty boy,” Shanks purred, dropping the bloody knife so he could smear all that red across Mihawk’s perfect chest. “This what you needed?”

“Y-yes, p-please,” Mihawk shook, back arching while he twitched, his eyes rolling white.

“Need your daddy to hurt you?”

Mihawk was shivering, whimpering, moaning when Shanks showed off those red fingers.

“Poor thing. Let me give my little freak what he needs.”

There was nothing like this.

“Such a perfect body, and you want me to rip it to shreds?”

“Gods, yes. Pleeease.”

Shanks would never have thought to do this with a lover, but Mihawk was hypnotizing. How could he not give him what he craved when he begged and whined for it like this? When the “Marine Hunter” would debase himself, would do anything Shanks asked him to, just to feel this?

“Tell you what, selfish brat,” Shanks taunted, just starting to ghost the tip of the blade along Mihawk’s skin. “Lay down, let me watch my little pain slut jack himself off, and I’ll keep ruining this pretty chest of yours until you come.”

Shanks gave a pleased laugh, deep and dark, while Mihawk fell to the floor, his back arching as he let out a pathetic, needy moan.

“Not gonna last long, are you,” he challenged. “Prove how much you want it, whore. Don’t stop touching yourself, or you won’t get any pain at all.”

“Yes, daddy,” the swordsman breathed, getting to work.

Beautiful.

Shanks paused for just a moment, stunned again by his powerful rival turned friend. Stunned by how wickedly perfect he was. Stunned by how much he wanted him. He’d almost forget just how much every time they drifted apart again.

“Da—“

“Don’t be impatient,” Shanks purred as he teased the blade down Mihawk’s side. He hummed at the twitching, near panicked body he had so much control over. “Tell me what you are.”

“I’m your pathetic slut, daddy’s whore, your— fuuck, Shaaanks.”

Mihawk could barely see with his eyes fluttering and rolling, but he caught that look on his friend's face.

Shanks was fucking glorious, the power he exuded like sweet poison. The swordsman would never let another touch his skin with a blade, would never admit this weakness to another soul. Yet, Shanks… He was perfect. Beautiful. Strong.

And he controlled him so well.

The teasing scrape of the blade turned to unreal pleasure as it pressed into his skin. Mihawk didn’t know why he was like this. Didn’t know when it started, but he didn’t fucking care.

That sharp sting of the knife slicing down, and the heat of the blood he could feel tickling along his skin, had him coming in his hand within the same breath. He bucked and moaned as ropes and ropes of come covered his stomach, his chest, the column of his throat.

~~~⚫⚫⚫~~~

“You did so well,” Shanks rasped, leaning down to taste the weak whimpers and whines still lingering on those lips. “How’s my pretty boy doing?”

“I…” he tried, breathless, with the hint of tears shining in his golden eyes. “Thank you, daddy.”

“You know I’ve always got you,” Shanks promised. He breathed those words along Mihawk’s skin, trailing soft touches, and teasing nails across that magnificent, painted body to bring out more delicious sounds and shakes. “Just relax, baby. Breathe for me.”

Mihawk couldn’t understand. Couldn’t believe the pleasure that Shanks gave him. That he let Shanks give him. There was no one else he could trust. No one else he respected. No one he wanted…

“Shanks…”

The red haired pirate chuckled at Mihawk’s reaching fingers, kissing the man’s temple to soothe that tension.

“Don’t rush, bright eyes. Just feel good for me. We'll get you cleaned up in a bit, then you can show daddy how grateful you are.”

Mihawk could never admit that the weak sound that left his throat was a sob, but he stopped caring when Shanks kept touching him, kissing him, dragging nails down his skin, just enough to make him moan.

He’d never felt safer.

~~~

“Look at you.”

Clean and bandaged, with his black hair still damp from the shower, the swordsman’s breath caught at Shanks’ hushed words, at the way he watched him crawl across the small bed.

Those brown eyes were too soft. Mihawk shivered under that gaze before he found what he was looking for.

“Just like that, baby. So good for me.”

The praise made him dizzy, dizzier than the swollen cock he’d licked and teased before swallowing deep, his watery eyes still locked on the soft, brown ones above him.

“I love it when you do that,” Shanks hummed when Mihawk massaged his balls, still taking that veiny shaft down his throat, so fucking deep. “Such a good boy for daddy. I’m close, keep those lovely eyes on me.”

Mihawk moaned around his cock, and Shanks couldn’t handle the look on his friend's face. He fisted that damp, black hair, and took control, just like his swordsman needed. Fingers gripping tight, demanding, taking and taking as he shoved that pretty face up and down his cock like a beautiful toy.

“Fuck yeah. You love being daddy’s little whore, love taking everything I fucking give you, huh?”

The pleasure of the new pain sent the swordsman to blissful twitching, not caring if he choked, wanting it, wanting to be used.

“Fucking take it. Take daddy’s come, show me how much— fuckin’ hells. You feel so fucking good. Swallow it all like a good boy.”

Those soft eyes and those desperate eyes stayed connected, fighting against the instinct to thrash, to writhe, to look away. They stayed connected until Mihawk’s throat took every last drop of Shanks’ pleasure, the giving and taking between them like another spar, a dance between too-friendly rivals.

“Come here,” Shanks purred, his lovely smile making the swordsman feel the urge to frown. Instead, he moved to sit against the headboard with his friend, hoping the barkeep was still downstairs so he could book another room to sleep in.

The safety Mihawk had felt was dwindling fast, being replaced by the need to leave, to pretend he hadn’t let himself be so weak.

But he supposed a few more minutes of resting by his red haired rival wouldn’t hurt.

~~~

Shanks felt light, almost high, when Mihawk crawled up the bed to lean against him. He was staying. Staying still for once. The red haired pirate let his fingers travel along that perfect skin covered in new and old scars, taking in Mihawk’s intoxicating scent. Taking in every feeling he tried not to carry when they were apart.

“Hey, Hawk?”

“Mm, what is it,” the swordsman drawled, fighting with the exhaustion that was trying to convince him to stay.

The red haired pirate didn’t want to explain, didn’t want to risk losing his courage, so he pulled away just enough to look into those golden eyes.

“I love you.”

Mihawk thought he must have fallen asleep, but it was too real. The scent of their bodies. The sting of the wound on his chest. Those gorgeous, soft eyes.

“Please,” Mihawk laughed. The cruelty in his own voice felt like a storm he couldn’t stop, only watch as it tore through the world. “Love is boring.”

“What?”

Shanks tried to keep that lightness. To pretend he wasn’t hearing this, wasn’t watching those cold eyes go deadly.

“Don’t be boring, Shanks,” Mihawk sighed as he pulled back. The safety he’d felt was a lie, ripped away. He couldn’t think, couldn’t take in whatever that look was on his rival’s face. He just needed to leave.

To be alone. Safe.

“Hawk,” Shanks breathed, staring at the swordsman while he pulled on those fancy clothes. He brought his shaky hand to the sheets, focusing on controlling his breath, his heart, so that his friend wouldn’t hear just how fucking deep he’d wounded him. He didn’t want to feel this, just wanted to shove it down.

“See you next time, Red Hair.”

Shanks couldn’t shove it down. The door closed, and every good feeling he’d ever had seemed to rush out of the room with it. Every good feeling he’d just had in this shitty room turned tortuous as he tried not to suffocate in it. Every word, every touch, every look in those golden eyes.

“Fuck…”

The red haired pirate managed not to yell, not to destroy. He managed not to leave this inn to find another at the risk of running into his friend. He managed to finish all of those opened bottles on the floor while he tried not to choke on the painful heat in his throat.

Shanks managed to drink enough to blame his tears on the liquor, and to lie to himself that he was fine. That he would get over it.

He’s heartless. A pirate without a fucking crew. Dracule Mihawk isn’t capable of love. I should have known he couldn’t love me.

He can’t love anyone.

Those thoughts weren’t as comforting as he wanted them to be.

Mihawk’s thoughts were not as clear as he needed them to be. Not as calm, not as empty, not as safe.

The way he’d fled that room, and avoided that hurt gaze, made him fight to keep steady.

What was he thinking? Ridiculous. Idiotic. How could we even—

Not even worth entertaining. Boring.

Mihawk ran from the feelings within him just as he'd run out of that room, out of that tavern. He ran and shut the door, pretending that it meant nothing.

He stuffed every thought of it away. Every thought of those soft, brown eyes away until he forgot what it was he was truly running from.

Something that couldn’t be real, and could never be safe.

Mihawk could never risk feeling safe.

He could never risk the idiocy, or the blindness, of something as boring as love.

~~~⏰🗡️🔴⏰~~~

~~~~~~

“Welcome, welcome, fine guests, to the Cross Guild’s very first gala affair,” Buggy’s voice boomed, bright and shining on that small stage while he addressed the gathered crowd. “Before our main event, we’ll enjoy a delightful dinner accompanied by the flashiest show you’ve ever seen.”

Buggy winked for the crowd, yet even though you knew it was really for you, you couldn’t feel a thing. Just the ice trailing down your spine.

“For now, please help yourselves to the hors d'oeuvres, enjoy an aperitif, and dance, before we all make too much berry on wicked things.”

Your clown was a bit more reserved than his usual shows, with a mesmerizing lightness to his movements, his body floating just slightly within his clothes. Yet he’d dialed up his dark charm, the tantalizing danger that so many of these bored, high society leeches were hungry for. Just enough to titillate, not enough to scare them away. Buggy had listened to your notes, adjusting his act just enough to still be his, yet still appeal to this privileged group. The excited buzzing of the vultures around you told you that he’d hit his mark.

Galdino nodded at you as you scanned the crowd, his eyes flicking back to watching the select group of pirates they’d deemed appropriate guests to not frighten away the potential backers.

Part of your mind was in work mode, going over every detail, deciding which asshole to shmooze first.

The rest of you was gone. Shaking. You could feel his stare.

Uncle was smirking at you over his drink. He wasn’t paying attention to the leeches at his side that were trying to bask in his glow as if the Sylvad wealth could rub off on people.

They sold me.

“Dance with me, little rabbit.”

Mihawk bowed his head a bit, those dangerous fingers reaching for yours. There were only a handful of couples on the floor, and your employers weren’t supposed to touch you.

He sold me. He’s throwing me away just to line his pockets. Never real, just pretend.

Uncle Cedrick’s charming laugh carried over the music, finally giving the other guests some attention. You could still feel his eyes.

“I’m a terrible dancer.”

“You don’t need to dance,” he smirked, taking your hand in his before leading you toward that gleaming floor. “I’ll do all the work. Just let your body listen to mine. I know you can do that, rabbit.”

Mihawk didn’t give the tease his usual force. It didn’t knock you off your feet, but it was enough to make you sigh, relaxing your shoulders just a bit.

“Breathe with me, love,” the swordsman soothed, and you couldn’t stop yourself from melting as his hypnotic voice washed over you. “No one else exists. Nothing else exists. Just our bodies, our breath, and the music. Will you believe that with me? Will you dance with me, darling?”

“Okay,” you whispered, your body shaking for him now.

Just a little more pretending.

~~~~~~

~~~🐊🔴🐊🔴~~~

Shanks was haunting the corner bar, downing his third aperitif, and trying to ignore the stares he kept getting.

Oh, yeah. I’m Red Haired Shanks.

He chuckled to himself before returning his focus to her, watching Hawk treat her like she was precious, watching him care for her, dance with her. Yet her eyes were still empty.

Y/N. It’s my fault she’s… I thought I was such a good man. So fucking egotistical—

“Red Hair,” came a gruff voice, accompanied by the thud of a golden hook onto the pretty bar top.

“Sir Crocodile,” Shanks replied, still watching her. He finally glanced over after a too-long pause, surprised to find the larger man looking almost pained. “What’s going on?”

Crocodile didn't want to do this. Didn't want to say this.

He wanted to gut this man, then suck the life out of him until all that was left was his stupid, red hair.

I don’t want to be a monster to her. Not to them.

“Will you protect them,” he choked out, forcing the painful words past his lips. It felt like admitting defeat, and his body raged against it. “Will you take care of them?”

Shanks forgot to breathe from the shock of what he thought he’d just heard.

“What—“

“If they choose you, I won’t stop them. If you swear you’ll take care of them, all of them, then I won’t stand in your way.”

…

Crocodile almost lost it, almost reached for the man’s throat. Hesitation was fucking unacceptable.

Shanks felt like he’d plummeted to the bottom of the ocean, dark, heavy thoughts drowning him in a silent death.

This monster, this villain, cares enough to let them all go.

What does that say about me?

“I swear. I’ll protect them. I’ll care for them. I’ll—“

“Good,” Crocodile snarled, holding himself back like a wild beast. Like a monster. “Y/N’s uncle crashed the party, and she won’t let us kill him yet. I’m gonna put you at his table. See what you can find out about him.”

Shanks went to stand from his stool, all those words not fully registering. He stumbled just a bit, and Crocodile let out a vicious growl.

“For fuck’s sake, are you drunk already?”

“Not even close,” Shanks sighed, steadying himself. He couldn’t seem to find his balance in this upside-down world.

“Get your shit together. If you show me you can’t protect them, then I won’t care what they want, I wont care what I want, I’ll just fucking kill you.”

“What do you want?”

Shanks stared up into that frightening face, and couldn’t understand. Couldn’t believe.

“I want them all to be safe and happy. Don’t make me regret trusting you.”

Crocodile felt like his organs were boiling with the need to end this man. To end this man that was taking what’s his. He stared down into stupid, brown eyes, grinding his teeth against his rage.

“I want the same thing.”

“Then prove it,” Crocodile spat, leaving Shanks to sway.

Buggy…

I have to tell him.

The Emperor of the Sea floated through the crowd to sneak backstage again, hoping he could figure out the next right thing to do.

Hoping he could prove it.

~~~🐊🔴🐊🔴~~~

~~~~~~

“You look absolutely enchanting tonight, love.”

“There’s no need to brag about your work.”

The tease left your lips like a miracle, and Mihawk’s eyes filled with that lovely mix of annoyance and pride that you seemed so skilled at drawing out of him.

“My vicious rabbit is always stunning, even when I don’t get my hands on her,” he teased back, still perfectly guiding your body along the dance floor. “Though I certainly enjoy the honor.”

You barely heard the satisfied hum he let out when you shivered, yet his voice was still too much. His voice was a drug, just like his eyes, his scent, and his wicked, wicked fingers.

Mihawk was pleasure, seduction, desire. The pain he added to that intoxicating mix only made you crave him more. He made you feel so many things. Hard things. Soft things. Addictive things. Your eyes fluttered as you fought to stop thinking this way about the man that sold you.

Just for daydreams. Not real.

~~~~~~

~~~🗡️🗡️🗡️~~~

Perfect.

She’s perfect.

Mihawk wanted to kill every single soul in the room, just so he could hear only her. Hear only her lovely heart, beating against his. He could hear it all, but he needed more, needed her.

He needed to keep that spark in Y/N’s eyes. His breath had caught at that glimpse of her, at her brave, little tease. That attitude he ached to punish and praise, and never go a day without hearing.

Everything. Mihawk wanted everything with her.

“Little rabbit?”

“Mhm?”

The world’s greatest swordsman was bested by this strange, lovely girl. The effort, the bravery it took to keep going was almost insurmountable.

“I’m not pretending.”

Y/N stiffened at those whispered words, and his hands had to control her, carry her even more, forcing her body to follow his dance.

“Please…”

“I know I don’t deserve you, but I’ll do anything, darling. Anything to watch you. To watch how your beautiful mind works, to see you be fierce, to hold you when you’re tired.”

Mihawk felt high. He’d finally forgotten the rest of the world existed. Nothing but Y/N in his arms.

Now that he’d started, he couldn’t seem to stop. When she rested her cheek against his chest for a moment, Mihawk almost fell to his knees. She breathed him in before showing him that tiny spark of her, still burning behind those beautiful eyes.

“You’re not tricking me,” Y/N questioned, her voice hesitant, wounded. It tore his insides to shreds to hear her in pain. To know that he’d been the cause. “You didn’t sell me?”

“Rabbit…”

Why didn’t I see what she was before? She believes I could… would I have?

Guilt almost stole his breath, his courage.

“I am so sorry, Y/N. There are no excuses for a villain like me,” he breathed, lost in her, needing her. “You have taken me over. The thought of losing you…”

“Mihawk?”

His name on her tongue. Lovelier than the rarest of wines. The only thing he wanted to hear.

“I don’t care what you decide, rabbit. I will follow you anywhere, if you would have me.”

The swordsman couldn’t read her. Since she’d fallen apart, Y/N had become impossible to understand, impossible to decipher, her body’s new language from some other world.

A lonely world that he needed to pull her back from.

He needed her back.

“I love you, Y/N,” Mihawk confessed. He noticed that his hands were shaking, almost losing his hold on her. A tiny moment of feeling selfish passed before he breathed her in again. “My little rabbit… I love you more than I can fathom, more and more with every moment. You have woken me up, darling.”

Mihawk tried to reach her, tried to read her, but knew that he couldn’t take from her anymore. All he could do was tell her the truth.

“Y/N, you have brought me to life.”

Her heart.

What does that rhythm mean?

“Mind if I cut in?”

~~~🗡️🗡️🗡️~~~

~~~~~~

It was a miracle that your Uncle hadn’t been vaporized on the spot by the murderous glare Mihawk flung his way. His touch that had been so gentle a moment ago went rigid, your bodies gone still in the middle of that shining dancefloor.

“Come now, it’s just a dance,” Uncle Cedrick prodded, and you wondered if he understood how close to death he was.

Mihawk wanted to kill him. Truly.

He really didn’t sell me?

“It’s fine,” you soothed, pulling away from your lover that had violence radiating off of him in waves. “I’ll be fine. Please, don’t—“

“Alright, love,” he conceded, his eyes somehow even more intense as he studied your face. “I’ll listen to you.”

Mihawk placed your hand in your Uncle’s, his own hand tensing before letting you go.

“Much obliged,” Uncle Cedrick purred as your swordsman walked away, his head jerking subtly at the sound of those words.

“So, dear niece,” he smirked, pulling you into position. “Were they actually able to teach you how to dance? Or do you still require a firm, guiding hand?”

You’d fought so hard against it, knowing it would only break you down. Knowing that all it could do was destroy you.

Yet catching Mihawk’s gaze while he studied your uncle like fresh, new prey did something. You knew you should stomp it out, but the rage in those golden eyes had lit a spark. Just an ember, glowing weakly, but it was there.

Hope.

~~~~~~

Likes, comments, and reblogs bring me much ✨dopamine✨ thank you!!

a/n: !!!!! I am eating, sleeping, and breathing this party 😅 I rarely do more than a vibe outline for a fic, usually just a brain dump, but I wanted this party to come together smoothly. Y'all, the OUTLINE for this party is 23 PAGES 🙃🙃🙃 Lol, get comfy (and, oh gobs, please tell me what you think so far, I've been going bonkers 🙏🏼🙏🏼)

Part 25

Operation Olive Branch has compiled a working spreadsheet of ways to help families fleeing from the genocide in Palestine. If you enjoyed this fic, and are able, please click the link to find a list of GoFundMe's, as well as other ways to help.

73 notes · View notes

papirouge · 3 days

Text

This exchange made me realize that many of you tend to forget that Carmy is a late bloomer who never had any girlfriend before Claire which actually explains his awkward behavior. I know it because I too am an awkward late bloomer (around the same age as Carmy and sharing a lot of common with him) and his behavior totally made sense to me lol

I want you all to keep in mind that when you've been closed off romantic elationships for your entire life, you're not handling them the same way people who started dating in their teens or young adult years (Carmy is most likely in his early 30s and never got into any relationships before).

Carmy, like any late bloomer, was used to never being considered romantically, which explains why he freaked out when Claire started flirting with him and stopped thinking rationally (which is very unfamiliar for emotionally avoidant type like Carmy or I - we'll come back to this later). I understand Carmy's move of giving a false number to Claire yet still accepting to go out with her later may be confusing to many people, but as a fellow late bloomer I immediately clocked it : we are not comfortable with the attention people give to us, but we *know* this behavior is not normal/unhealthy so Carmy eventually giving in may be a way of eventually getting into the mold and abide to the "if you don't open up to others and give them chances, how can you expect building actual relationships?" mantra. Because deep down we want to be like others (because being so closed off all the time can become emotionally draining) and seek to find a way to fit in.

Another thing about people like Carmy/emotional avoidant type is that by being so closed off to the world, we are also extremely deceptive about who we truly are. It makes sense to me that Carmy hides his feelings for Syd and would rather project them onto Claire. That's definitely manipulative, but we'd rather do that than get "uncovered". We tend to think very rationally and our sense of self perseveration is incredibly strong. I just know that howing his bare feelings has to be one of the most terrifying and embarrassing thing for Carmy.

We also don't mind getting confused as someone we are not in which we feel some sort of relief because it keeps our real self away from others perception (if that make sense???). Carmy passing himself as "Logan" in that party -while being quite extreme- is totally on brand actually lol. I regularly get mistaken as a male (I'm lowkey gnc) but I never bother correcting people lol I'm fine being whatever they see me as, as long it's not the real me.

Talking about self preservation: we don't ask and don't tell. Carmy sister being mad at him for never asking her whether she was okay was extremely relatable because I tend to get the same reproach from my own sisters. Very typical of us. Fleeing to the other side of the globe to cope with a family member death is something I *get* because we are avoidant in nature. We can also be insane hustlers and tend to cope with grief or unhealed emotions through work.

On the positive side, we are extremely independent and self reliant. The scene in the fridge (last episode of season 2) where Carmy loses his shit and says he was mad at himself for indulging in all "this bullshit" (= love and relationships) I FELT THAT. Countless times I prayed to God to remove from my heart my "shameful" longing for love & intimacy that I always felt hindered me in my quest for excellence & satisfaction in any other aspect of my life. Because we are very rational & practical people and lowkey despise "useless" stuff like relationships and feelings. And that's where the messed up part comes up.

I wouldn't be surprised Carmy lowkey despises Claire for being so clingy and courting him so openly. As I just said, we tend to look down on (bold) displayal of love and emotion which lowkey repulse us. I think that's why Carmy dislikes his sister's husband when he's an all around good guy. He may have a resentment (and even jealousy?) against this man that has no issue showing affection - not only to his sister, but also the rest of the family. Which Carmy still struggles to do so far.

This may also explain why Carmy is suddenly so cold with Claire when he's serving her at the table (beside him allegedly previously making up his mind to break up with her). That's why the moment he hears that voicemail of Claire saying she "loves him" he THROWS AWAY his phone. Because that's disgusting.

I think the CarmyxSyd dynamic is unique because there's a dimension of respect between both. They share the same passion for cuisine, and Sydney constantly pushes Carmy out of his comfort zone. As an avoidant emotional attachment type myself, when I think of the type of people I potentially could be attracted to, I can only think of people I have deeply respect for, and bring objective value into my life AND skills. I've seen people criticize the fact that Sydney was pretty much a "warrior worker" for Carmy (and pretty much the whole Bear crew) and that's true. But regardless it's a good or bad thing, that's pretty much the type of profile that may attract avoidant emotional type of people. Bonding through work & shared passion is our safest field to build romantic connection through. That's why Carmy made Syd sign a partnership agreement instead of a marriage contract 💅🏾 that's the safest way for him to convey his feelings.

Again, we are very rational people and in every type of relationship, we instinctively jauge whether & how this person might be useful for us. It doesn't mean we built relationship with people depending on whether they can be useful for us or not, but that's definitely in a part of our head somewhere. Yes, that's fucked up (1/because we are 2/that's why emotionally distant people can become pretty unlikable - i.e Carmy carmying), but you have to keep that in mind to understand how Carmy moves. Which tracks back to Claire's actual purpose I've elaborated just before. He definitely uses her, but most likely unknowingly.

#sorry for this random essay but I had to let it out there #i see myself in carmy A LOT and that's highkeh embarrassing #the bear #the bear fx #carmy berzatto #sydney adamu #carmy x sydney #sydcarmy #sydney x carmy #jeremy allen white #ayo edebiri #the bear hulu #personal #papi watch

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luizd3ad · 2 days

Note

OH ok ok ok…

Can I maybe request a Pandora x shy!reader who has a crush on Pandora but obviously just admires from a distance; but Pandora Be Knowing (tm) - maybe Pandora just starts inserting herself into readers daily routine and readers like “?!?!?!” and Pandora’s like “!!🥰😇🤗!!”

Hope this is enough? You can message me if you want more 😉 xx

Universes Mistake | Pandora Rosier x Reader

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ࣪˖⤷ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ ࣪ ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ˖ ⤷

Pairing: Pandora Rosier x Fem!Shy!Reader WC: 2,431 CW: Use of Y/N, kinda hints of more social anxiety and awkwardness than shy (??), Reader gets anxious and overthinks. Author's Note: My first request damn😮‍💨 I'm sorry it's taken so long I’ve just had like no motivation? it kinda looks like that been kinda going around rn tho? idk maybe somethings in the air lol. I really hope you like it tho. Summary: You've liked Pandora for years but with you being painfully shy you just like her from a distance but Pandoras not having that.

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°

The first thing you did every time you walked into one of the few classes that you shared with her was look for her.

She was just so amazing that you couldn't help but like her.. a lot. She was always so sweet to the people that were important to her. She was always so happy, so lively, she just seemed so carefree. Always laughing and smiling.

Merlin, that smile. What you wouldn't do to have her smile at you.

You’ve liked her since second year.

You were sitting under a tree by The Black Lake reading, you were almost completely lost in your book but then your attention was stolen when you heard talking and laughing.

Walking past you was Regulus Black, Barty Crouch Jr, Dorcas Meadowes, Evan Rosier and her, Pandora Rosier.

They didn't notice you but you noticed them.

You remember when you heard her laugh the first time, how it made your heart speed up, how your hands got all clammy, how you felt the heat crawling up your face. How you felt like you couldn't breathe.

You were captivated.

You started to notice her everywhere, classes, halls, the library, it felt like she had consumed your life in the best way possible.

You had always been the shy type, finding it hard to talk to people, making friends, you would get embarrassed easier than you probably should, you'd get easily nervous so you had always just kept to yourself, you were alone. That's how you liked it.. or at least that's what you told yourself.

So you were fine with the fact that she didn't notice you. You were happy and content with existing in the same space as her.

When you walked into Divination you noticed she wasn't there yet. You tried not to let yourself feel disappointed so you decided that in the meantime you would just take your normal seat in the back and get ready for class while letting yourself hope in the back of your mind that you'll see her at some point.

You were so focussed on getting ready for class and you didn't notice that someone had sat at the chair across from you until you heard her. “Hello, Y/N.” Your movements froze at the sound of her voice as if you were just hit with the ‘Glacius’ charm. You slowly looked up, trying to control your breathing.

Social interactions, talking to people made you quite nervous but most of the time it was manageable. Talking to Pandora though? That was something you would have never even considered.

You were content with just seeing her, from a distance that is.

“Um, H-hello Pandora?” You internally cringed when you stuttered and your sentence came out more like a question instead of just a normal greeting.

But Pandora just smiled at you, not in a teasing way but in a way that had you get butterflies in your stomach, a way that made your heart skip a beat.

To your relief before the conversation could continue the professor started class and for the next hour and a half you were sitting next to Pandora Rosier trying not to completely freak out or embarrass yourself.

When the class was dismissed you were out of there within seconds. You had never packed up and left a class so fast before. You were rushing to your next class trying to put distance between you and Pandora.

It's not that you didn't want to talk to her, it was just you didn't know how to talk to her.

How do you just talk to the girl that you’ve basically been in love with for years? How do you talk to someone that just made your heart melt by saying ‘Hello’ to you?

How do you talk to someone that makes you want to give her your everything just to hear your name fall off her lips again?

The rest of the day you were distracted by the thoughts of Pandora. You had shared classes with her for years. Why all the sudden did she sit with you? Why did she suddenly talk to you? Maybe she was just being nice? She was a nice person. That was one of the things you loved about her. It just never seemed like she knew you existed, let alone knew your name.

It had been a few days since Pandora had talked to you. She hadn't tried talking to you since.. admittedly it might have something to do with the fact that you didn't share many classes together and you might have also been actively avoiding her.. but who knows?

So that weekend you were in the library studying for a Charms test that was coming up. The library was quite empty since most people were off at Hogsmeade, you never went unless necessary which wasn't often. You liked how empty the castle was on Hogsmeade weekends. It was nice to just calm down for a while.

Especially because you had been spending the better part of the week running around trying to avoid Pandora.

At this point though you were willing to put the whole thing behind you. Just forget about it, move on, act like it never happened. Just chalk it up to a mistake made by the universe, something that would never happen again.

The universe didn't seem to appreciate your thought of it making a mistake because it was apparently wishful thinking to assume it wouldn't happen again.

Your head snapped up at the sudden sound of a chair being dragged on the floor. Across the table from you was Pandora, she sat across from you silently reading a book. She had a faint smile on her face but she seemed focused on her book.

You silently took a deep breath internally debating if you should leave or not.

You were there first. She didn't make it seem like she wanted you to leave. Maybe she wanted your company? Why else would she sit with you? Especially when there were so many empty tables.

You made the choice to stay and keep studying. Neither of you said a word the whole time you were there. You would look at her every so often but she did seem to move at all.

You hadn't realized how much time had passed until Pandora suddenly closed her book and stood up. You looked up at her surprised by her movements, based on the smile on her face you most likely looked as surprised as you felt. “It's dinner time. You should take a break and eat… Goodnight Y/N.” With that Pandora practically floated away, her smile never fading.

You felt your breath get caught in your throat. You mind started to race a bit. Why did she sit with you almost all day? What was her sudden interest in you?

You started to feel a headache creep into the back of your head, because of that you decided to take her advice. To eat dinner and then just go to bed. Once again you just wanted to brush today off as a mistake made by the universe.

Well apparently the universe really likes proving you wrong because the weeks following that day you and Pandora found yourselves in an unspoken schedule.

After classes you would sit at your normal table in the back of the library and start to study then Pandora would sit with you reading or working in silence till it was time for dinner, she always said the same thing by the end. ‘It's dinner time. You should take a break and eat.’ then she would wish you a goodnight and walk away.

You got used to having Pandora around. You stated to grow comfortable around her. You like being around her. You started to become comfortable with your routine.

Today was different though you only knew that when you grew closer to your table and you saw Pandora already there. In the few weeks you two had sat together you had always gotten there first. Pandora would usually follow after about ten minutes, today she beat you there.

Slowly and hesitantly you walked to the table trying to calm your anxiety. As you got closer to the table you notice that Pandora didn’t have her school bag with her but a picnic basket.

“Hello Y/N. I know normally we sit here but I was wondering if you were interested in going on a little adventure with me.” Her voice was as soft as silk and fuck that smile. She could get you to do anything with that smile.

So who were you to deny her?

You silently agreed with a nod of your head not trusting your voice. After she had gotten the picnic basket in one hand she slowly reached for your arm with her other as if asking you if it was okay, you once again nodded in agreement. Pandora linked your arms together with a smile on her face and then she led you out of the castle.

You two silently walked together arm and arm toward The Forbidden Forest. You started to slow your walking when you realized where she was leading you to, you sent her a questioning look. “We'll be fine, I promise. You'll like where we're going.”

A big part of you trusted Pandora more than you'd like to admit, but you couldn't help but be hesitant. You never went into The Forbidden Forest. You had heard the horrible stories rumors of past students that had ventured off into the forest and the beasts that resided in it.

The idea of going in scared the hell out of you but with a simple squeeze of your arm and that damn smile you started to happily follow her in.

As you walked into the forest you realized it wasn't as terrifying as people made it out to be. It was actually quite beautiful in its own way the farther you walked in. Sure it was dark and sometimes the shadows would play tricks on your mind but having Pandora help more than you thought it would.

She somehow managed to calm and spike your anxiety all at the same time.

Eventually she led you to a small clearing surrounded by fireflies, trees, small hills and a lake with grass and flowers covering the floor. Close by there was something that appeared to be a wooden arch, you felt your eyes widen when you noticed what was laying under the arch.

There were two unicorns lying next to each other, they seemed to be sleeping. It was a unicorn den and it was breathtaking.

While you were distracted by the beauty of the clearing and the shock of the unicorns Pandora had managed to set up a little picnic. There were small sandwiches, fruits and candies. She was already sitting down on the picnic blanket patting the spot next to her to have you join her.

You silently sat down next to her, your thoughts consuming you. You didn't want your overthinking to ruin this moment but you couldn't help it.

You had followed her into the ‘dangerous’ Forbidden Forest blindly. You had let her come into your life more than you thought you ever would. You had started to grow comfortable with her. Why was she doing this? Part of you was scared it was just a sick and twisted prank, but the rational side of you knew better Pandora wasn't that type of person, she wouldn't do that to someone (unless that someone deserved it). You just had to know why.

“Pandora? Can I ask you something?” For a moment you thought that your voice was too quiet for her to hear but it seems you were wrong since Pandora turned to give you all her attention with a small nod to let you know she was listening.

It took all your courage to start talking, to not back down. “Why the sudden interest in me? We've shared classes for years now and I didn’t even know you knew my name until you sat with me in Divination. I'm just confused.”

Pandora looked away for a moment as if she was processing your words. “I've always known who you were, Y/N. I also know how shy you are, I never wanted to make you uncomfortable. So I was waiting for the perfect moment to introduce myself.. but I realized that there's no such thing as the perfect moment.”

You couldn't help but be skeptical about her answer, it made no sense to you. What was the need for a ‘perfect moment’? “Why would you need a ‘perfect moment’ just to try to be my friend?”

A small smile spread across Pandora's face while a soft chuckle fell from her lips. She looked at you with those beautiful eyes, honesty with a hint of amusement lingered in them.

“Who said I wanted to be your friend?” Before you could completely process what she meant her hand cupped the side of your face while her thumb crested your cheek softly. “I don't want to be just your friend, Y/N. I want to hold your hand, to take you on dates, I want to spoil you rotten and I really want to kiss you.”

To say you were stunned by her answer was an understatement. You could faintly hear your heart in your ears while a shiver ran down your back.

This felt like a dream. You had dreamt about this, more times than you could count. The only way you knew this was real was because you could still feel her hand on your cheek. You could feel how soft her hand was, how warm it was against your cold skin. It felt perfect.

You two felt perfect.

Pandora was eccentric, lively and so free. You tend to keep to yourself, you're quiet and observant. You balanced each other out.

You don't know what came over you but before you could talk yourself out of it you softly pressed your lips to Pandoras'. Your heart started to race as your lips met hers. A wave of warmth washed over you as you relished in the feeling of Pandora's soft lips.

You drew back slightly, and you felt your breath catch in your throat, your cheeks felt hot. As you look into Pandora's eyes, you saw a beautiful mixture of sweetness and love in them.

She smiled at you and pulled you in for another kiss as soft and perfect as the last one.

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blackhairedjjun · 3 days

Text

second chance encounters

pairing: choi yeonjun x gn!reader | genre / tropes: slight fluff, acquaintances to ???, university -> working adult au, nostalgia & slice of life vibes | word count: 3.6k | warnings: alcohol, some profanity, work-related burnout

summary: it's been a year since you graduated from university, and it always seemed like life had different plans for you and for the resident dance crew heartthrob, choi yeonjun. that is, until you run into him by chance after work.

author's notes: hello! this is one part of a fic idea that has been stirring in my brain for the LONGEST time - i wanted a very slice of life fic about adult life and growing up, and for the longest time i tried over and over to write it. but it was hard especially since it involved such personal feelings and experiences and i wanted to capture it just right. but i managed to get this part out, and once i'm less busy i want to try writing a part 2 too. so here it is, i hope you enjoy!

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It was nearly midnight when you were finally let go from overtime duties at your job. You walked out of your building and, exhausted from staying up for so long, you plopped down on the curb in front of the entrance. At this hour you should try to get a cab home, but you wanted a moment to rest and regain your bearings first.

Despite the late hour, it wasn’t too dark outside; the streetlamps illuminated the sidewalks, and plenty of other office buildings still had windows with the lights on. Next to your building, a 24-hour convenience store was flooded in fluorescent lighting. Maybe you were lucky to have gotten out before midnight when plenty of others were still staying up. But with your eyelids drooping and your whole body feeling heavier than a slab of rock, calling yourself “lucky” felt like a stretch.

You spent the next few moments letting your attention drift, your eyes fluttering shut. You could still see the spreadsheets swimming in front of your vision, and you could still hear your boss’s voice urging you to keep up with the pace. “We won’t go easy on you just because you’re a junior. In fact, you should be working harder if you want to prove yourself.”

Work harder... prove myself... The words were in your mind constantly, even when your body protested.

Your eyes snapped open for a moment and you spotted a tall man in a hoodie exiting the convenience store, plastic bag in hand, headed for a nearby parked car. Perhaps it was just your fatigue making you see things, but he looked familiar.

He turned his head in your direction and your eyes met. You watched his own eyes widen in recognition.

“Uh, excuse me一” he approached you, scratching his head, “did you perhaps go to...?”

He mentioned your university’s name.

You blinked and studied his face.

Of course.

You had spoken to him only a handful of times before, but you still recognized the former captain of your university’s dance crew. Everyone at your major had known him.

“Choi Yeonjun...?”

一

Three years earlier

You swished around the beer in your plastic cup, watching the party scene unfold in front of you. The music blared from someone’s speakers, competing with the loud voices of your fellow university students shouting and laughing over each other, and tipsy students nearly stumbled into one another as they tried to reach the cooler for more drinks. All the while you leaned against the far wall of the common room, taking small sips of your beer, glancing around now and then for a sign of your roommate.

Still nowhere.

She’s probably playing a drinking game with one of her friends, you thought, or in another room making out with that guy from the dance crew. You sighed and drained the last of your beer, but made no move to refill it. The room was full of people you didn’t know or barely knew, their faces vaguely familiar from some common classes you shared with them, and you didn’t have the courage to talk to them. None of them paid you any notice either, instead staying close by the friends they already knew.

You had hoped that your roommate would at least be polite and introduce you to some friends you could stay with, but she had left your side as soon as you both entered the party. You sighed.

Just them a tall man in a baseball cap blocked your view.

He was clearly drunk, from the way his face was flushed red, and blinked a few times at you. You recognized him as a classmate from your literature elective, though you couldn’t remember his name.

“Do I... know you?” he slurred, blinking again. A small spark of hope rose in your chest.

“Yeah, we’re actually一”

He threw his head back and started laughing, nearly dropping the beer bottle he was holding. You tried to speak but he only laughed more. “Ah, what am I saying... who are you... hah...”

Your heart sank.

“Hey, you’re bother 一 you’re bothering them... that’s not nice...”

Another man appeared at your classmate’s side, nudging him. You could he that he was also tipsy from his pink-tinted cheeks and the way he stumbled over his words, but he seemed to have enough sense to stop his friend. He too looked familiar, but you weren’t not sure from where.

“I’m not boooothering,” your drunk classmate whined.

“Heh, okay you’re not... let’s just hang somewhere else...”

He squeezed his drunk friend’s shoulder, which seemed to divert his attention; he turned around to leave the room. The man then turned to look at you and you swore that he was properly looking, not just staring with his eyes glazed over from the alcohol.

“Hi...” He let out a little giggle. Cute.

“Um... hi?”

“Sorry ‘bout that... we won’t bother you... have fun.”

“It’s okay...”

He stood there for a few moments, smiling at you. It was just a lopsided smile from tipsiness, but you couldn’t help the flutter you felt in your chest.

Then, as if awakened out of nowhere, he snapped to his senses. He waved at you, letting out a shy “bye!”, then turned around to follow his friend. You watched his back as he nearly stumbled over the couch and disappeared into a room at the side, and for the first time that night, you smiled.

It took a few moments, but you finally remembered why that man was so familiar: He was a prodigy member of the dance crew, the one that had won countless competitions against other dance crews from different universities. He was only a sophomore and already he was turning heads. Of all the members of that award-winning roster, he was said to be the best one.

His name, you recalled, was Choi Yeonjun.

一

You sat in the passenger seat of Yeonjun’s car with your hands folded on your lap. A jazz-pop playlist was playing from the car stereo, and you glanced over at your driver, who was humming along and drumming his fingers on the steering wheel. His posture was relaxed and he steered with one hand. As the song reached its final chorus, he broke out into full song, singing with such passion that his eyes and nose scrunched up.

Maybe it was a bad idea to accept a car ride from someone you barely knew, but it was certainly a better option than remaining seated and half-asleep on the curb in front of your office building. Besides, you had heard nothing but good things about Yeonjun during your stay in university. You had been classmates with a few dance crew members and they always spoke of him with a tone of admiration.

The song came to an end just as the car stopped at a red light. At this hour, there were hardly any cars on the intersection. Yeonjun turned towards you and smiled.

“I haven’t seen you in ages,” he said.

“Me too.” You fought your tiredness to manage a smile.

“It’s so good to see a familiar face. I just moved here a few weeks ago.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.” He tilted his head at you and licked his lips, thinking of what to say. “I actually got back from visiting my parents... I had to pick up some of my stuff there to move to my new studio. Then I ended up having dinner with them, walking around, catching up, and well... I was hoping to be home by ten.”

Your tired smile turned genuine at his story. “That sounds really nice, though. I visited my parents last month, so I get what you mean.”

“Mm, I miss them already.” The traffic light turned green and Yeonjun turned to face the road again; the car cruised past the buildings of the business district, the lights in some of their windows still on. “Hey, how long have you lived here?”

“Less than a year ago, I guess? Pretty much right after graduation. I got a good job offer so I moved here so that the commute would be a bit easier.”

“Yeah, that makes sense... hold on, the building I found you at...”

“Uh-huh?”

“You work at StarOne?”

You sighed. When you had first gotten the job offer, everyone around you had oohed and aahed, throwing compliments and congratulations your way 一 you had gotten a job at one of the biggest, most prestigious companies in the country. You had blushed and beamed at them and replied with Thank you and Oh my god, I’m so excited too. But it hadn’t even been a year since then, and now all you knew were hours of overtime and unhappy clients, rush projects and evaluations where your boss and his boss peeled back your pride layer by layer. You’re doing good, but we didn’t hire you for ‘good’, they would say. We’ve got dozens of other junior officers and even more applicants standing outside our doors, clamoring for the job that you have.

You took a deep breath and prepared yourself for the canned responses you had developed when asked about your job: Yes, I work at StarOne. The pay is fine. The hours are pretty long, I guess. It’s challenging. But at least I work at a good company.

But instead the car reached another red light and Yeonjun turned to look at you and his eyes softened, as if he had seen the exasperation you so often hid. “Oh... overtime?”

You nodded.

“Ah, sorry. You’re probably too tired to talk about work, huh?”

You nodded again.

He blushed and turned away for a moment. Then he reached to the passenger seat behind him, picked up a thick dark blue blanket, and handed it to you. “Ah, my bad, I shouldn’t have asked... Do you want to rest for a bit? You can sleep for the rest of the ride if you want. Don’t worry, the blanket’s clean.”

Your memory stirred and brought forth a moment three years ago, when you had first run into Yeonjun at a party. In your mind you saw the way he had squeezed your old classmate’s shoulder, keeping him from bothering you too much, and the way he had looked at you right after. You remembered feeling seen, as if he regarded you as an old friend.

The way Yeonjun looked at you now, blanket in hand, felt exactly the same.

“Oh... you didn’t have to.”

“Keep it in case you get sleepy.”

You took the blanket from him, his fingertips brushing yours as he handed it over, and unfolded it on your lap. When you looked back at him you couldn’t help the small smile forming on your lips.

“Thank you.”

He made sure to drive a little more slowly after that, but you could still hear him softly humming along to the songs on his playlist. The sound of his voice wrapped around you even more comfortably than the blanket.

You closed your eyes to let your mind wander. Sleep didn’t come to you, but new thoughts did 一 thoughts of Yeonjun and what you had known about him from university. Though you had barely spoken to him, your social circles did overlap somewhat; you had been classmates with a few dance crew members, and a few of his friends had been in the same major as you. Every time his name was brought up, it was always in a positive light, whether it was him helping out a new dance recruit or inspiring the rest of the dance crew to work harder. Not once had you heard anyone speak ill of him.

Now you understood why.

一

Two years earlier

You watched the rain from the entrance of the campus arts building, its extended roof keeping you and several other students dry. Today the downpour was much better compared to previous days 一 you could actually see ahead of you, for one 一 but it was still bad enough that the endless drumming of the rain on rooftops filled your ears, and the pathway leading out of the building was a blur.

Still, you had a class in ten minutes and Professor Im had not made any announcement of cancellation. The sciences building was a short walk away but you needed all the time you could to get there and dry yourself off. Sighing, you fished your umbrella out of your bag and silently thanked your past self for remembering to pack it this time. With the push of a button (good thing you got one of those automatic ones) the umbrella opened, you held it up, and you hugged your bag more closely around your body to keep it dry. Here you go.

You had barely taken two steps out of the building when someone bumped against your side. Your umbrella shook, causing a few rain droplets to land on your head, but you barely felt them. Not while you were too busy staring in horror at the student who had bumped into you and was now running through the rain, not caring that they were getting soaked to the bone.

“HEY!”

You chased after them, your umbrella swaying as you ran through the pathway, shouting at the student to wait. You were no match for their pace 一 you could see that they had long legs 一 but they finally heard your shouts, slowed down, and turned to look at you.

Oh. Choi Yeonjun.

His hair was wet, with his bangs clinging to his forehead, and his hoodie was so drenched that it had turned from light grey to dark. He was still panting from his sprint and the dampness on his face was a mixture of rainfall and sweat.

You felt your face grow hot. Somehow offering to share an umbrella with someone you kind of knew was more embarrassing than doing it with a total stranger. But you were already here anyway and it seemed rude not to say anything.

“Uh, we can... share...”

You held the umbrella up above your head to accommodate his height and he laughed.

“You don’t have to,” he said. “I’m headed to the gym for dance practice, it might be too far.”

“It’s okay! I’ll take you!”

That was a lie. The gym was in the opposite direction from the science building. But you had perfect attendance in class so far, so you figured that one late mark wasn’t too much of a cost.

Yeonjun giggled and took the umbrella from you. His hands were soft as they brushed against yours. Your whole body felt warm despite the chill from the rain. “I’ll hold it for us then,” he said.

You smiled and moved closer to him. “Thank you.”

“Nah, I should be thanking you. Coach would’ve embarrassed me in front of the whole team for being late. And I told the new members last week not to be late! I would’ve looked like a dummy in front of them.”

He laughed again and you couldn’t help but laugh too. His walking pace was brisk but you didn’t mind, keeping up with him and listening to him talk about his dance practice. A whole other world within the university campus seemed to open up in front of you, one of competitions and prizes and prestige and a lot of blood, sweat, and tears. Yet there was an unmistakable gleam in Yeonjun’s eyes as he talked about the team’s new routine and the higher challenge level for it.

“We’ve only got a week left so we really can’t waste any time,” he said. “So... thank you. This helps a lot, really.”

The two of you were standing in front of the gym entrance. The rain had died down to a drizzle, and he lowered your umbrella. The walk from the arts building had felt like both an eternity and a moment.

You took the umbrella from him and his hands lingered on the handle before he let go.

“See you around,” he said. “Good luck with class.”

“Yeah, see you... good luck with practice.”

Yeonjun turned and sprinted into the gym, and you headed back to find the path to the science building. Not a single worry about being late bothered you, and you couldn’t help yourself from smiling.

一

Yeonjun’s GPS led him to a boxy apartment building. It was painted completely white, reflecting the light of a nearby streetlamp, which gave it a sterile glow. He pursed his lips; not the most homey place to live, he mused, but at least it looked well-kept.

He turned to you and found you asleep in the passenger seat, his blanked draped over your shoulders. Your chest rose and fell ever so slightly from your breaths, and your expression was completely calm. There was no trace of the undertones of stress he’d sensed when he had approached you; whatever worries you had about your job seemed to disappear in your dreams.

Yeonjun lifted a hand to tap your shoulder awake, but he hesitated. A wave of relief overcame him, and for a moment he couldn’t help but admire your serene expression as you slept. You looked so... content. Had he ever seen you look that way? While he had crossed paths with you only a few times, you had always looked as if something was on your mind. He could still see it all in his memories: the loneliness in your posture when he approached you at the party, the nervousness in your eyes when you had offered your umbrella to him. He wondered what worries were always plaguing you, and if anything could be done to keep them away.

At least he had returned the favor for the umbrella incident, he thought. And it only took him two years.

His hand was still hovering over your shoulder when you awoke. You blinked a few times to chase the sleepiness away before turning your head to look at him. A small smile spread across your face and Yeonjun felt a flutter stirring in his chest.

“Are we home...?” Your voice was still hoarse with sleep.

“Just got here.” He smiled. “I can walk you to your door...”

“Mm, okay...”

Your apartment door wasn’t far up, only on the third floor. You had his blanket draped around you like a scarf, and Yeonjun carried your bag for you. He set it down beside your door, its black paint finish contrasting with the white walls, and waited for you to unlock it.

It was only when you pushed the door open that you noticed his blanket around your shoulders. You tugged it off and handed it to him.

“Oh, sorry, I forgot一”

“Keep it.” Then, feeling a little bold, he continued: “You can give it to me the next time we see each other.”

“Next time...?”

His smile faltered. Did you not want to see him again? Was he being too forward? Did he overestimate how much you remembered him? Why did he feel so keen on seeing you again in the first place?

“You don’t 一 you don’t have to.” He reached a hand to take the blanket. “Sorry, I was, I was just...”

But you regained your senses from your nap and beamed at him. The sight of it sent another fluttering feeling through Yeonjun’s chest.

“No, I mean... I was just surprised that you’d want to catch up, that’s all.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I... um. I do want to catch up with you, Yeonjun.”

“Great! Oh shit一” He clasped his hands over his mouth. His voice had come out a little too loud. “I mean, let’s work something out. I can give you my number...”

一

You had been lying in bed for fifteen minutes and you were still awake. You should be trying to sleep for another day of overtime tomorrow, but all you could think about was your drive home with Yeonjun.

You reached for your phone on your nightstand and looked at his contact for the fourth or fifth time since you’d shut the door behind you. He had saved his contact name as “jjunie” with a little fox next to it, and the sight of it made you chuckle.

Did this really happen? You thought of the few times you had run into each other, seemingly at random: his cute little “bye” as he clutched a beer, or his damp hair sticking to his forehead as he held onto your umbrella. His life felt tangential to yours, always passing by you, but never with you. And yet you were holding on to your phone with his number in it and an offer to see each other again.

You laughed again and set the phone down on the bed, on top of the blanket that he had lent you, and rolled to your side. It didn’t matter now, you mused. Old memories gave way to newer ones: his smile as he opened the passenger side of his car for you, his humming to a jazz tune as he waited at the intersection, his soft hands placing the blanket in yours.

No matter how things had been back then, they were different now. Yeonjun would stick around in your life for a little while. You might even have a friend, and the thought consoled you as you finally drifted off to sleep.

#txt x reader #yeonjun x reader #txt x you #yeonjun x you #choi yeonjun x reader #kpop x reader #txt imagines #kpop imagines #yeonjun imagines #txt fluff #yeonjun fluff #tomorrow x together imagines #txt fic #txt fanfic #yeonjun fanfic #bhj: violet's works

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suplicyy · 2 days

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[Prompt Series pt.3]

You sharing a dessert with Goshiki

Summary — Goshiki and you are on a date and you share your dessert with him.

— Fluff

— Gn!Reader

It had only been a short time since you entered into a relationship with Shiratorizawa's future ace, Goshiki, and since then, everything has been amazing for you two. And today would be an amazing time too, since you were going on a date!

And this would definitely be a perfect day, everything would definitely work out, right?

...Right?

That thought was completely burned by the flames of hell when Goshiki reached into his pocket and couldn't find his wallet. At that moment the poor boy felt his soul leaving his body.

And he couldn't even go back to his house and get it back, he was already too far from his house for that.

He was already waiting for you at the meeting point you agreed on, and you hadn't arrived yet. The only thing he was thinking at the moment was: How would he explain the situation to you?

Since the beginning of your relationship, Goshiki has always liked to spoil you, give you your favorite snacks, take you for a walk somewhere you like, and even buy you gifts, even though they weren't those fancy and expensive gifts, you always loved the affection that he has to remember the things you like.

And since he is now without his money, how could he make you happy!?

His desperate thoughts stopped the moment he felt a small poke on his shoulder.

"Tsu, are you okay? I was calling you but you didn't listen..."

The cute nickname you gave him a while ago made his heart race, but it still wasn't enough to get him out of the despair he was feeling about the whole situation.

"N-No- I mean yes!! Everything is fine! Heh..." he says nervously. You thought he was just shy because of the date, since he always has the same reaction when he sees you, so you didn't mind too much and held his hand, guiding him to your destination.

"I saw that a really cute coffee shop opened here recently! What do you think about going there?" you say in an excited tone. "Well... O-Of course! Let's go!!"

Goshiki cursed himself internally, for not having the courage to tell you about the situation. He was generally known for being a very ambitious and courageous boy, after all he even told his team's great Ace to his face that one day he would surpass him. But whenever it came to you, it seemed like his world destabilized, he really likes you and wants to do everything he can to impress you and get what you deserve, so if something he does for you goes wrong, he can get really upset with himself.

He only realized he arrived at the coffee shop when he heard the door bell being rung as you entered the cozy space. The fragrance of coffee beans being ground and sweet breads coming out of the oven reached his nostrils, which made him sad, knowing that he couldn't buy what you wanted at that moment.

"Didn't I tell you it was super cute?? I never make mistakes in my recommendations, right?" You say with a smile on your face, which soon disappears when you feel a squeeze on your hand. "I-I'm sorry [name]..." He looks at the ground with an sad expression, in a way of not making eye contact with you.

"Goshiki what happened?" You reach out with both of your hands to cup them on either side of his face, lifting him up so you can see him better. "You know you can always tell me everything, don't you? I won't be mad at you." Goshiki stops for a moment, but then he lets out a sigh and finally tells you what's bothering him. "It's just... I forgot my wallet..."

There was silence after that. At that time he was convinced that you would fight with him, or even worse, leave him. But all of that went away when he heard your little laugh, that laugh that always made his day better.

"Tsu, is that what you were worried about? You know I have money too, right?" "B-But... then I won't be able to make you happy...!" You gave him a sweet smile, and then planted a soft kiss on his lips, an action that made him blush furiously in the same second.

"You fool, just having you here with me makes me happy! Don't worry about it anymore, okay?" you hold his hand again and guide him to the dessert display, pointing to a delicious slice of cake. "How about this one? I think I only have enough money for one piece... but it should be enough for a drink too!" Before he can protest, you walk straight to the register, heading to place your order.

After you pay, you sit at a table near the window, with a slice of cake and a mocha.

"Y-You didn't have to do that..." Goshiki says in a worried tone. "Well... it's just that you always buy things for me, so I want to spoil you too!" You take a piece of cake with your spoon and bring it to his mouth. "Whether with sweets or other things you like, I want to make you happy, like you do to me every day!"

At that moment, the boy felt his heart warm with your gesture of love for him.

"I-I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!" he shouts excitedly, opening his mouth to eat the piece of cake you offered him. Some people glared at him for shouting in a space that was supposed to be relaxing, but you didn't care at all.

On this pleasant afternoon, you two shared a dessert that you would definitely eat again, but the dessert wasn't as sweet as Goshiki's love for you.

A/N — HELLO FRIENDS!! This weekend I was super busy doing school work that I left at short notice, so it took a while for this one to come out.😭😭

And this week will probably be a bit hectic for me, as my exams start next week, so don't worry if I don't post anything here!

Prompt used for this post — Person A and Person B sharing ice cream/cake/a dessert.

[Prompt Series Masterlist]

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu oneshot #hq x reader #hq fluff #hq #goshiki tsutomu x reader #goshiki tsutomu #shiratorizawa #shiratorizawa x reader

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ghostinthegallery · 13 hours

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I can't believe The Silence and the Storm is over a year old! The first anniversary was May 27th (yes I missed my own fic's birthday in my defense I was traveling and forgot how time works).

I'm trying to compose my thoughts because this sure feels like a time a blog post would be fitting. However, my engrams are scrambled because...wow do I have too many feelings.

As some background, I've been a writer for a long time. And I've written 3-5 books (depends on how you count "completing" a book but it's 5 full drafts, 3 of which were heavily edited). I wanted to be a trade published writer (still do) and for a while I was feeling good about my chances! I got lucky and received some wonderful professional mentorship (and met one of my best friends during that program!). I took that guidance to query agents (a necessary step for access to most big/medium US publishers). I knew it would be hard and take time but...4 years later all I have to show are a few requests, hundreds of rejections, and one agent who asked me to rewrite my entire book only to reject me anyway (me, bitter? No not at all nooooo).

I'm a creative person and sharing my work feels like sharing a part of myself. Something that is not easy for me to do. After a while I just assumed I was missing something necessary. My work didn't resonate, but I didn't know how to fix it. I’d never reach anyone in the way I so desperately craved, and it was my fault for not being good enough. I felt broken.

During one of many major depressive episodes my spouse bought me a copy of The Infinite and the Divine. That book has changed my life. I was never much of a fanfic writer before. Either I thought the original work was too good and I didn't think I had anything to add or it was too bad so why would I bother with it when I could just go read/watch something better? 40k inspired me though. The ideas are incredible but underutilized enough that I felt like I had something to add.

So I started writing necron fic because why not? There wasn’t enough for me to read, and I needed more robot stories. Maybe I could rediscover my love of the craft, make some friends, make some robots kiss. Distract my mind from the horrors. So I posted a little OC fic and actually got some nice comments. Hey! Positive reinforcement! Hadn't had that in a while.

Emboldened, I continued in the most normal way possible. Going from a 7 chapter OC story to a giant civil war epic including every named necron character I could find with 6 (then 7...then 9) POVs. It was the type of grand space opera I've always wanted to write but never did because I didn’t think I had the skill and it's harder to sell. Luckily AO3 is free. Ain't no playing to the market there!

Now, a 40k necron civil war space opera is...niche. So I wasn't expecting much. I would have been happy with some kudos, some comments. Fan art felt like a pipe dream, but what are writers if not dreamers? The main goal was to enjoy myself. It was low pressure fun, I love the characters, what could go wrong?

Nothing, but I was wholely unprepared for things to go as right as they did. Y’all have been amazing. So many great comments and ideas exchanged, gorgeous art, fun asks, a lot of screaming (it’s fine probably don’t worry). I’ve never had such a strong outpouring of support for my work. It feels incredible. But also sometimes confusing. I’ve trained myself so well to handle rejection that I kind of forgot how to handle acceptance. Especially for something so personal. This is a weird story about undead space robots, there’s a lot of politics, sometimes the robots have sex. It’s got out there head canons, and 99% of the tyranid parts are pulled out of my ass because nobody knows how the space bugs work okay. My weirdness being embraced on this scale is one of the greatest feelings of my life. But it’s also new, and way out of my comfort zone. I’m being seen and adjusting to that.

Still, writing in this space has been one of the most consistently joyful things in my life for…well, over a year now! It’s changed how I view my art. I actually can create stories that touch people and make them feel things. I can take risks and have them pay off. I know not everyone will love this, but some people really seem to love it. That is mind blowing to me.

It’s making me reassess a lot about how I approach my art. Writing and other. I still plan to pursue publication. I want to get paid for my work, but this is making me consider alternate paths that might fit my style (and psyche) better. I don’t know what the future holds, but if you’d told me a year and a half ago that a big part of it would hinge on an AO3 gay robot skeleton space opera…I would have thought you were nuts, but also hoped you were right because that sounds rad as hell.

So in conclusion, thank you all so much for reading <3

#Personal post #very very personal post #The silence and the storm #happy one year anniversary folks #Thanks again

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wisheslost · 11 hours

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The white-eye warbles, the camellia blooms.

As a writer of Yae Publishing House, you have to visit the shrine for work purposes quite often— and it is on these shrine visits that you came to be even more acquainted with the yashiro commissioner, of whom you were previously known to only as that writer he had bumped into at the Irodori festival, in his sister's words; the most cliché way possible.

cw : mutual pining, friends/strangers to lovers, fluff, reader gets screamed at but its fine its not by ayato, no use of y/n, reader is technically an oc but is never referred to with a name. pls lmk if I should add more!

a/n : ive been meaning to post this but i kept stalling😭 sorry

wc : 5.4k

Kamisato Ayato is a smart man. The revered head of the Kamisato clan knows all there is to know about what's going on amidst the different commissions in Inazuma, but not a single clue does he have about the feelings you harbour for him, and who knows when he will?

You seldom had the opportunity to go to the shrine, and so, everytime you came down from the shrine, everytime you hurriedly made your way through Chinju forest, you did with the same intention in mind— to see Ayato. It didn't matter if he didn't notice you, just a glimpse of his face made your day better.

One of these very days, Ayato saw you pass, and much to your surprise, invited you in to have tea. In an attempt to be polite, and since you were done with work at the time, you accepted his sweet offer.

And so it continued — each time someone of the estate saw you passing by, they'd invite you in and offer you tea, while you tried your best to decline most of the time, sometimes it was just… not doable. Convincing Thoma was a hard job, but to persuade Miss Furuta to let you go was even more difficult.

Now, Ayato wasn't always there, sometimes he was out for a meeting or was doing work in his chamber ( the same chamber you found yourself too unimportant to enter, the chamber that felt almost suffocating to you the one time you went in there. ) but even when he was, if he heard of you having came, he'd offer you to tea with the condition that you had to wait till his work was done. You loved his company, so who were you to deny it?

And perhaps that love you had for the time you spent with him turned into the love you had for him.

You two weren't strangers. No, not at all. You bumped into each other during last year's Irodori festival, and in the most clichesque way ever, all your documents had fallen down, and being the gentleman he was, Ayato helped you pick them up ( obviously !).

Ayato found himself writing you a letter ever so often, and your reply to it that laid there among his official documents was the last to be opened of the day—but not the least, no, it was a way for him to conclude his day positively, or so he had told you. And as you two grew closer, you only found it easier to share your work with him, snippets of something you wrote that you were somewhat proud of , but that didn't make it into the published version of the story, a verse from a poem you gave up on writing, anything you thought he would like— you sent him, and eagerly waited for his reply.

You'd read him some of your poetry time to time— each time you came by his castle of a house, and each time he simply stared at you until you finished, and would then ask you why you used a certain metaphor to describe a certain thing, to which you'd happily answer, or commend you for having thought of something in such a different way, and at the end, he'd pass a rather funny comment, even if unintentionally, such as one like "I want this framed on my wall." to which you could do nothing but laugh, while he simply gazed at the beauty the sky harboured, seemingly deep in thought. Why he always did that, you did not know, and you could only wonder, what exactly did he think of each time?

Is showing your unpublished work to someone outside the Yae Publishing House breach of contract? No... Well, not exactly. You had agreed to abstaining from showing anyone anything that has to do with your unpublished literary pieces, but you knew the publishing house wasn't ever going to publish the poems you wrote on your own. They would say things like the topic's too vague, the metaphors don't make sense, and that the writing didn't flow, whatever that meant. So, what you wrote for the publishing house was what they demanded from you— quite different than what you actually wrote. Alas, they don’t understand your words when they're not catered to them. But it's fine, Ayato did, and what more could you ask for?

Actually, if given the chance, you would definitely ask for something more.

Kamisato Ayato understood social cues quite well, or atleast one would think he would, as that was a big part of his duty. So why he couldn't comprehend your feelings for him, was a mystery to you. But I guess understanding if someone likes you or not isn't really something listed in the skillset a Yashiro commissioner requires.

Now, what he could and couldn't understand was not your problem, and would no longer be, not after you confess your feelings to him. You figured it would be easier to do if you just played it out like one of your usual interactions, and so you wrote a poem. A poem you'd innocently read out to him one of those days you happen to stumble upon his house, and with it, he'd finally understand. Finally understand you liked him.

Something else popped up. A question much unappreciated. The worst outcome possible. “But what if he didn't like you back?” Well the poem isn't even for him then! It's from the point of view of one of my original characters— yes, that excuse is good enough.

But then the day finally arrived, you were finally there, sitting in Kamisato Estate's courtyard eagerly waiting for Ayato to be done with his meeting that had started just as you came, it was not often Ayato had meetings in his chamber, so it seems you just happened to have bad luck today. Sitting on the cushion, waiting for Ayato to be done, you found yourself making multiple revisions to that poem of yours, and in the middle of that, you were suddenly reminded of the meeting at Yae Publishing House you had this evening, but the thought soon slipped your mind as you thought of another line for the poem.

He had promised it would not take too long, but one hour had gone by just like that, and before you knew it, you were barely keeping awake, you couldn't help it, running on 2 hours of sleep from having worked all night, your mind was starting to shut down. Resting your head on the table was probably the first mistake you made that day— but one could argue there were plenty other mistakes made before that, such as not having slept in the first place.

You usually came to meet Ayato around the evening, not only because his workload was lighter that time of the day but also because the publishing house's important meetings and discussions of the sort were held most often, if not all the time, early in the day. And that was precisely why you had forgotten about that meeting you had this evening. Was it the two hours of sleep or the anxiety from the whole confession thing? whatever it was, it was just making your day harder and harder.

It had been an hour and a half since you arrived at Kamisato Estate, the hour spent waiting and scribbling, and the half spent peacefully sleeping as no one bothered to wake you up. It wasn't that the staff of the estate couldn't care less about you, in fact, everyone around noticed you having succumbed to slumber. But who dare to awaken you, Clan Head's possible significant other?

It's true that Ayato was unbeknownst to your feelings towards him, but those at Kamisato Estate weren't. It was easy to tell you had a thing for him, much too obvious that every time you saw him in the eye your heart skipped a beat, and practically every one of the estate's staff thought you two were together, and just trying to hide it. To them, the way you looked at Ayato, was the way he looked at you. His, a loving gaze that never lets go of your frame, and a soul that so desperately wants to tell the whole world how much he loves you(— but hell, he couldn't even fathom telling you) and Yours, a stare that quickly tries to focus on something else when noticed by him, a heart too heavy with emotions— emotions that cannot find their way through speech, and are expressed only through words.

And that serene and loving gaze was the first thing you saw being woken up, because in that whole house, no one except Clan Head himself would have the courage to wake you up.

It's not until Ayato's voice echoes in your ears accompanied by the faint pitter-patter of the rain that you realise your noses are barely inches away from touching as he knelt down to your level.

“Oh, my writer, it seems you've slept most wonderfully in my absence, and on Thoma's jacket, huh?” his tone had a bit of sneer in it, as if he was jealous of the fact you had used Thoma's jacket as a pillow. And there was that— “my writer”, it stemmed from an inside joke, wherein once when he was transcribing a poem you wrote, you called him ‘my personal calligrapher’ which warranted the “That would make you my writer, hm?” and you knew it was a joke but goodness, he called you that only when people weren't around, and the way he said it everytime, Oh Archons!

But wait— You weren't supposed to be swooning over Ayato right now! You should be at the publishing house, attending that meeting— and so you rose up frantically to leave, apologies leaving your mouth rapidly,

“Lord Commissioner, I'm so sorry but I must go, I had an important work thing and I- I'm sorry! I should hav-'' and that is when you get cut off by Ayato's forefinger upon your lips, if that was an attempt to shush you- it worked. “Just go. I understand.” he said, and the reassurance in his voice and the slight smile on his face brought you right back to your senses.

And so you hurriedly put on your shoes to make a run for it, uttering one final ‘sorry’ to him, much to his dismay. And as you made it out the door of the estate, you heard Ayato's voice calling to you- “Take an umbrella!” to which you could only respond— “I'll be fine! The rain's not that bad!” because right now, saving face at the publishing house was far more important than a few drops on your clothes.

Except it wasn't a few drops, you had greatly underestimated the power of the Hydro Archon, because by the time you reached the doors of the publishing house, you were completely wet from head to toe— and saving face was no longer present in your dictionary. In fact, you never even wanted to show your face again- and god, how many and who even were the people attending that meeting? because you were going to embarrass yourself in front of all of them right now.

The second you entered that room where the meeting was going on, as if your bad luck wasn't bad enough, you saw a figure too striking, bright pink hair.. fox ears.. and those eyes, those eyes that didn't take even a full two seconds to notice your presence and announce it to the whole room.

“Oh, look who's here! did the Yashiro Commission- er, reject you, my dear? or did you finally realise where your priorities should lie?” and right after she had said that, you could feel that theories about you and the commissioner had already began floating in the air of that room— whispers of a mixture of words like yashiro commissioner, head of the kamisato clan could be heard, and among them was that name a bit too familiar- Kamisato Ayato. How she knew about your yashiro commission shenanigans, you had no idea, but you weren't about to question her— Guuji Yae was no god, but people were convinced she definitely was omniscient, the way she never lacked information about the people she worked with.

You could swear on your life that the stutter after the words ‘yashiro commission’ was done on purpose, and you'd live. What she was trying to imply wasn't too obvious, in fact, the way she said it, it could easily be interpreted as something entirely different— but what was also true, only it wasn't something you were comfortable with everyone in that room knowing. You couldn't manage to respond to that, ‘tleast not in a way that would allow you to keep your job. And so Guuji Yae's lips spoke again, this time out of pity for you.

“But hey, better late than never.” she said, gesturing for you to come sit next to her.

And so the meeting went on like normal. You were trembling terribly from the cold, dripping wet still but there wasn't anything you could do about it, and as the guy sitting next to you took notice of that and offered you his jacket, you could feel watchful eyes throughout the room landing upon you two, waiting for your response. With the amount of writers present in this room, you knew this interaction was making its way into a light novel soon. Thinking of a response was hard, accepting it would give birth to more conspiracies, but not accepting it would blatantly prove Guuji Yae's previous comment about the yashiro commissioner right. And before you could think of a response to that awfully nice gesture, you were snapped out of your thoughts by your editor, who was currently explaining something on a whiteboard, something you failed to understand because of the preoccupations your mind currently had. “(Name), are you even paying attention !?” were his words, and as if enough people weren't already staring at you, now the whole room was. A nervously spoken ‘sorry’ was all you could let out, and it wasn't even a proper answer to his question.

The meeting dragged on for another 15 minutes— 15 dreadful, cold minutes. And when it was finally over and people were getting out of their seats and as if your luck wasn't already the worst, it only got worse-r as your editor called out to you right as you got up, “Not you. I still have to talk to you.” Did he not see you shivering? Looking like a sopping wet cat? Did he not have an ounce of sympathy?

As everyone else exited the room, you were forced to sit until who knows when. Guuji Yae was the last to leave, and before she stepped out the room, she called the editor over to speak to him, uttering something along the lines of what you thought was “Go easy on the poor thing, ok?” and was that poor thing in question you? most likely, yes. And good for that— he shouldn't think to disobey the owner of this whole establishment right?

But he did. Or atleast, the words that followed after she left did not seem like him ‘going easy on you’ at all.

The way he had his arms on the desk, the way his figure loomed over yours, that expression on his face… oh, you were about to be scolded big time.

“You, tell me. What exactly is your problem?”

“I'm sorry, sir. It won't happen again, I apologise.” You couldn't even make eye contact with him as you spoke, and while your attempt at an apology was well delivered, it was terribly timed.

“If you were so fucking sorry as you claim to be, tell me, what the hell has been bothering you so damn much to arrive late to an important meeting when i had reminded you so many times the previous day!?”

Oh. That was a first— never before had you heard him swear like this, and you're pretty sure it probably falls under top 10 things you shouldn't do if you don't want to lose your job, but who were you to say? your job was being held together by a single thread made of miracles.

“I'm really sorry sir, it was just something personal- I can guarantee you, it won't ever happen again.” Ah yes, the infamous personal issue: the inability to manage a schedule.

“Did someone pass away?”

“..No.”

“Someone fall gravely ill?”

“..No”

“Family issues?”

“No-”

“Then WHAT the hell’s been bothering so much you show up late to a meeting with GUUJI YAE? Do you seriously not understand how fucking embarrassing it is? For the writer I had to practically beg for the higher-ups to not fire even though you kept being late and crossing deadlines, to show up late again?” He had yanked you out of your seat with his right hand midway through his speech out of the anger he possessed as of current, becoming physical when angry wasn't uncommon, but for someone who you always saw as calm and cool, for someone who always put up with you no matter what, the breaking point had arrived, and it was wholly your fault.

But you understood. Understood the reasons behind his furious reaction, for he was right, it was truly embarrassing, because that thread made out of miracles that was holding your job in place wasn't made out of miracles at all— it was made out of your editor's continued efforts to keep you in this organisation.

When you didn't, well, more like couldn't respond to him, and he realised the outburst he had just made, he let go of your upper arm, and his hand went back to the desk with his other arm, and as he regained his senses, looking down at the desk realising what he just did, he tried to apologise-

“I didn't mean to-”

“I-it's fine. You don't have to say anything.” Cutting him off was usually not something you would do, but at this moment, it felt right.

“I'm sorry, Please leave. And please, please don't tell anyone about this.” You could see the regret in his face as he sat down on his chair, head in hands refusing to make eye contact with you and instead choosing to stare at the hardwood floor instead, and you knew if anyone found out about this you both would be kicked out the publishing house together.

“I won't. Good night, sir.” and as you exited that room, you could hear a faint “good night” from your editor, who was too ashamed to even speak any louder.

And as you left, you failed to notice the bright pink figure of the Guuji beside the entrance of the conference room, who had eavesdropped on that entire conversation.

________

It had been 11 days since then. 11 days of Ayato wondering whatever it was that you wanted to tell him that day, hoping you would at least write him a letter. But no letter came, and neither did you.

While the Kamisato's days went by quite peacefully and ordinarily, yours were much, much different.

Back at Yae Publishing House that day, the Guuji held your editor back to tell him to get you to write some sort of romance novel around this plot– A careless writer who has amazing skill in writing, but barely manages to keep her job due to the troubles caused by her family, and her editor who has to beg the higher-ups to let her keep her job, who's also hopelessly in love with her.

While the plot is good, you weren't too happy having it recommended to you in that way. Does the Guuji think you have romantic feelings for your editor? or is it vice versa ?

Whatever it is that the Guuji thought, it didn't matter right now, because she demanded the first volume of the comic book that was about to be serialised be done in 15 days. With 11 days already gone by, and everything done on your part, you finally had some leisure time to enjoy, leisure time you were spending laying on the floor in front of the fan sipping cold lavender melon juice peacefully, almost on your way to dreamland.

That is, until you heard a knock on your door. When you went to open it, no one was there, or so you had thought, not having noticed the little kid dressed like a mujina at your doorstep at first, looking sleepy as ever.

“Oh, hello! What is it that brings you here to my doorstep, little one ?” as you bent down to greet the sleepy child, you felt a muscle in your back ache. Ah, the consequences of having the worst sleeping posture known to man.

“I'm not ‘little one’. My name is Sayu. I'm from the shuumatsuban, and Mr. Yashiro Commissioner sent me to relay an important message to you.” as she finishes her sentence, she hands you a little paper from her back pocket that says “I have something important to speak to you about. Come meet me. -your personal calligrapher”

Oh. You're done.

What could it possibly be about !? What could Kamisato Ayato, Clan head of the Kamisato Clan and the Yashiro Commissioner have to talk about that would be important to you !? Whatever it was, it was scaring you.

“Do I have to go right now?” as nervous as you were, you were also curious, what the hell was this man upto? and actually, was he even upto something, or was this just something to get you to come to the estate as quickly as possible?

“Yes, that's what he said anyway.” as she said this, Sayu sounded so, so done with you and Ayato that you couldn't really do anything. It seemed like if you didn't go right now, as soon as possible, Sayu would fall asleep right on your doorstep.

“Alright, then, let us leave. But wait- just one thing-” and so, you went to your bedside table to pick up that diary you always took to Kamisato Estate, the one you wrote that damnee confession in- but, it wasn't there? surely you placed it somewhere else when under the influence of fatigue and forgot.. Well, with Sayu's patience running thinner- you should probably just leave finding that diary to your future self.

Sayu was not at all interested in whatever it was that went on between you and Ayato, she kept quiet the whole way from your house to the Kamisato Estate, except for a yawn or two in the middle.

Your attempt at distracting yourself from whatever it was that Ayato wanted to talk to you about by looking at the flowers and the trees as you made your way to the estate was not quite successful.. for as the dew drops fell off from the roses, you could feel yourself perspire as well.

When you finally stepped foot in Kamisato Estate, you saw him, Kamisato Ayato, simply leaning on his balcony ledge gazing at the horizon, unaware of your resence and all he made you feel. You were quite sure this amount of sweating could submerge Jinren Island.

Jinren Island being submerged aside, no one was there at the estate except Ayato. Miss Furuta wasn't standing at her usual place, Koharu wasn't busy cleaning something that doesn't even look like it needs cleaning, and even Mr. Madarame was nowhere to be seen.

As you were busy analyzing the current state of the ground you were standing on, Sayu's voice spoke—

“Mr. Yashiro Commissioner, I brought them.”

Ayato turned around, his eyes finally meeting yours after what seemed to be an eternity to him.

“Oh, thank you Sayu. You may go now.”

As the man came to sit down, he signaled you to sit near him as well, contrary to how you would usually sit, on the opposite side of the table. “Sit here, you sure look like you need to.” his voice beamed, and you could feel your heart burst into eight thousand pieces upon hearing him talk to you again.

While you were most delighted to finally talk to him again, you couldn't help but wonder where the staff went, therefore naturally, you asked him as he poured his tea from the kettle into his little cup,

“So… where's all the staff gone?”

“Disappointed no one's here to give you free snacks, huh? Don't worry, I'm quite generous when it comes to my food, Here, want a sip?” and as his sentence came to an end, he offered you a cup of tea by raising it to your lips, which you pushed away as politely as you could. “You know I don’t drink tea, right? You asking me multiple times isn't going to change that..”

“Well, it was worth a try.”

“But seriously, where are all the staff? in all my days spent procrastinating here, I've never seen it so empty..”

“I told them to take a break as I was going to have an important person over to discuss some very important, urgent matters, and for that discussion, I need some privacy.”

“But then why not have the meeting in your chamber? Enough privacy there, no?”

“Of course, of course, but you see, this client of mine, they think my chamber is really stuffy and feels suffocating. So naturally, I decided to have said meeting here.”

“Oh, so uhm, when is this meeting of yours? considering the staff are already gone..It must be soon, yes?”

“Oh yes, yes.. Infact, for the staff, the meeting has already started.”

“Wait.. Am I..?”

“Go on, you're almost there.”

“Jackass, I'm the ‘super important’ person you were meeting, huh?”

“See, this is exactly why this meeting is being held. The way you address me, the way you talk to me.. it's not exactly the usual way I'm addressed.. Not even my friends behave this way with me.”

“You have friends?”

“Of course I- See ! that's my point, you talk so nonchalantly to me, what do you think people would think of you as when they see you acting like this in public ?”

“Disrespectful? Discourteous? Rude? Impolite? Ill-mannered?”

“My beautiful Oxford dictionary, that's not what I meant. Don't you think people would look at us joking around and think of us as lovers ?”

As soon as you heard that “beautiful”, oh goodness, you were done for. you had fallen so deep in love with this man it was beyond any find and rescue team to help you. you couldn't make an answer to that statement, no, you were busy in dreamland wondering if all these people at the estate saw you and Ayato talk to each other and thought, “oh, these two definitely have something going on.”

Snap. one snap of his fingers in front of your face, and you were thrown right back into reality.

“So?”

“Uhm, we don't go out much, actually, we've never gone out together, so that's not a problem as far as I'm concerned.”

“The way you say it.. it's almost like you're mad we never go out.”

“Well, we don't. I've never even stepped foot on the east side of the estate.. let alone go anywhere with you.”

“Hm? Let's go there then.” near the end of his sentence, he placed his teacup down and got up, walking to the same place he was standing before you came here, and so you followed.

As he leaned on the ledge of the balcony, his body facing the horizon, he looked at you, hands crossed, yours facing him.

“So? What do you think, are we qualified to go out now?” he spoke, turning towards you, and as he turned, he looked up at something and then smirked, his eyes returning to you. Goodness, he looked so hot— but wait, what was he staring at? before you could fully turn your head to face behind you, his left arm quickly got hold of the side of your neck that you were about to turn, “Why are you-”

“Answer my question first.” throughout this exchange, his hand was still there on your neck holding it from turning around.

“Yes, we can go out together, but what the hell is behind me that you don't want me to see?”

Leaning in towards your ear, he spoke. And to say his lips were one breath away from touching your temple is an understatement. “You remember the thing i told you about the staff, right? Well, they've all gathered near the first window of the second floor, and are currently looking at us, waiting for something to happen.” while he said all this, he was staring daggers into Thoma's soul, who, being the one who accidentally spread the rumour that Ayato was going to confess his feelings for you today, was awkwardly smiling at the slightly pissed off clan head, whose confession of love was about to turn into a source of entertainment for his staff, and of course, something to tease him about later for his sister, also present with the staff. Finishing his sentence, he finally pulled away from you.

“But.. waiting for what to happen..?” trying to get the butterflies in your stomach to calm down from what just happened, you focused back on the conversation.

“Waiting for me to confess.”

Stop the clock. He didn't mean confess his love, did he? Surely there's no way.

“C-confess what!?”

“That- ah, I can't believe I'm saying this in such an ordinary way, but listen, I'm not a man of poetry, or atleast, writing it. I tried to, believe me, but it just looked so awkward to me, nothing compared to what you wrote for me in your diary-”

“YOU READ THAT POEM?”

Ayato put his hands on your shoulders, and in an attempt to calm you down, spoke forth.

“Hey now! Let's calm down, alright? I didn't read anything beyond the 9th line because Ayaka snatched it away from me, so please, don’t be mad. I should have realised I was in no place to open someone else's very personal diary, and I don't even know if that poem was meant for me, but I just-”

“No.. Ayato, you're.. You're too sweet. I'm sure you had no ill intentions, I only freaked out because it was so surprising, and since it was indeed meant for you. And you can read the whole poem afterwards, but for now, please, please go on about what you were telling me.”

“I can't just go on like this, not after you've told me you wrote about me- Me, of all people! Me, after you've written about the sun, the seas, the sky, the surreal- after all that, you wrote about me. And so beautifully, too, I can't go on, not with my life, not with whatever it was I originally wanted to say.” his expression was one you had never seen before, so full of innocence, he looked like a wet puppy in the rain, like he'd die of a cold if you didn't shelter him right away, and you could swear you saw tears welling up in his eyes, and all this because you wrote about him, all this because his feelings were returned, all this because he finally felt loved.

You couldn't even respond, hell, you couldn't even choke back tears, and so as you were processing his words, you wrapped your arms around his torso and went in to hug him, sobbing into his chest. He returned the hug, one arm around your shoulders, and one running over your head, a tear dropping on your head as he did.

When you both pulled away from the hug, it was just laughter and wiping away each others’ tears, until you both were staring at each other fondly. And then Ayaka's voice could be heard from the back— “I told you they wouldn't kiss!” followed by a subdued Thoma, “my mora..”

“You know we can hear, right? And betting on my love life? Seriously?” As Ayato turned to reply to his sister, the staff scurried away, not wanting to be noticed by him, and as amused as you were, you didn't join in on the conversation, instead choosing to pull Ayato's collar towards yourself and pulling his lips onto yours. Before Ayaka could respond, Ayato leaned in to the kiss, cupping your face with his hands, and you could feel him smirk a bit.

He chuckled while pulling away from you, turning to a very surprised Ayaka and Thoma, mouths open in bewilderment,

“So... I guess Thoma wins?”

#[ mine 🐳 ]#genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin impact fanfics #genshin impact ayato #kamisato ayato #ayato kamisato #ayato x reader #ayato x gn!reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin fanfic #Kamisato ayato x reader #gi ayato #ayato x you

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venusmage · 2 days

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Commission/Life update for 2024

Just want everyone to know I AM okay now and life has gotten better recently. However the past year and a half have been extremely difficult and I'm only now getting back on my feet. I generally don't like sharing life details publicly, but as a freelancer with clients that have been waiting for a while I feel like transparency is key.

If you don't want an explanation for the delays and just want to know my completion timeline, that's totally okay. Here is all the info up front. I'm going to continue updating my commission queue as usual and will not be accepting any more orders until ALL of the queue is completed. I'm working on finishing the half and full bodies first since they've been the longest waiting in queue. Then the rest. I don't have a set date in mind for when they'll be all done for good but the goal is by the end of the year. I think that's more than doable for me now. If you're a client of mine and have questions/concerns, please message me either here or on Discord and I'll do my best to help you. My username on discord is the same as my Tumblr username. Twitter and Ko-Fi are also options but I don't check them as frequently. I usually work Monday-Thursday so that will be the best time to shoot me a message or expect an update to the queue.

Information on what's been going on is below.

CW for mentions of death, financial hardship and homophobia.

As a few of you might remember, in 2019 I was disowned by my mother for being a lesbian. I made the choice to go no-contact. Since then, up until LAST YEAR, she's routinely harassed me or had other family harass me, stalked me on social media, tried to get to me through the website I take commission orders, and threatened me multiple times. I was forced to move across the country both because I felt unsafe and because my partner had family elsewhere that were more accepting. I've had to change my phone number twice.

It's been extremely difficult both financially and mentally to keep my head above water. In 2021 my grandfather died and I still haven't felt like I've been able to properly grieve. I wasn't able to see him due to her and I wasn't invited to his funeral. We were very close and he meant the world to me. In 2023 my grandmother passed away very suddenly as well, and my mother used it as an excuse to harass me over ko-fi/my professional email. It was such a horrific experience that I fell into a months long spiral that I only just now feel like I'm climbing out of. This is when commissions first stalled. I was also starting to get overwhelmed, as I had to take on more work than I could realistically handle in order to pay bills and rent. That's really it - I just had to take more orders so we weren't kicked out of our apartment, and as my mental state deteriorated I couldn't keep up.

The good news is that my wife and moved earlier this year we're living with supportive(!) family now and our financial burden is much lighter. This gives me time to work on my backlog without re-opening. I'm also going to school again, back in college starting this summer for a second degree. For my own health after commissions are finished I'm likely going to take a break on opening them for a good while, even though I really enjoy doing them.

In the past two months amazing and not-amazing things have happened. The amazing thing is I got an ADHD diagnosis, something I didn't even know had been ruining my life for years. I'm still getting used to the proper medications but I'm already seeing a big improvement. It's as much of a relief as it is frustrating. My mother also reared her head again (like she usually does at least once a year) - this time, though, I learned she'd had a stroke. While I'm not involved with her anymore, I think most people could understand how it would still be a very weird and upsetting situation. As of right now I'm free of her once again, she seems to be making a good recovery and will hopefully continue to live a happy life far away from me. Still, those two things back to back have been a LOT to deal with on top of just trying to get better in general. I stepped away from the internet for a while for my own sanity.

The downside to being a freelancer is that there's not always a safety net. That's what happened to me. Thank you all very much for being kind and patient, I genuinely have had nothing but polite interactions with all of you and I really appreciate it. I'm sorry my personal bullshit got in the way of getting my work done for you. This is the longest I've ever taken to complete commissions and it's something that I'm deeply ashamed of. I promise they will get done. Being medicated and starting to recover from the family drama has revitalized me a bit. If you have any questions or concerns please reach out.

#no art here #life update #this is gonna be pinned and linked on my queue

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magnificentstrawberryomen · 19 hours

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Indisposed (Noah Sebastian fanfiction) chapter seven

18+

Autors note: hello! an update, finallyyy hehe. also, i found it very hard to pick a gif this time, like hello he's gorgeous on every single one pff 🫠. but then i saw this one and i got a hot flash right away so i was like ... yeah okay then this is the one GYUFHIJOF. anyway, hope y'all enjoy this chapter, it's long asf btw lol. oh and, i wouldn't read it in public if i were you. 🙃

chapter seven

As I follow the guys, I look at my phone again, having a whole bunch of notifications: two texts from my best friend, five from my mom… including seven missed calls from her.

‘Oh please no,’ I mumble to myself, not looking forward to whatever she has to say to me. Let’s say that me and my mother do not get along very well.

‘What’s up?’ I hear Noah ask next to me, looking over my shoulder out of curiosity, trying to see the cause of my annoyance.

‘It’s my mother,’ I sigh. ‘Seven damn missed calls from her. Wonder what I did wrong in her eyes this time now,’ I mumble while rolling with my eyes.

As soon as Noah hears that it’s about my mom, a frown appears on his face and his forehead wrinkles. He knows a little about her-that I grew up with her and my dad in a little religious town in the UK, and we especially started to not get along anymore when I became a teenager and developed my own will and opinions.

It all just had to turn that big of an issue for her that she basically kicked me out, making me live with my aunt (her sister) here in the United States since I was thirteen. And believe me… I actually had a way better life with my aunt. I have always been hurt deep inside that my own mother kicked me out and found her religious beliefs way more important than her own daughter, but as I grew older I could accept it piece by piece, and I have always been grateful-and still am-that my aunt took me into her loving home. To me, she became more of a mom to me than my own biological one has ever been. A lot of times I have felt like she never deserved that title.

Of course my older sister, Kate, has always been the perfect daughter to her, following her religious footsteps like some too tall fucking baby duck (she is seriously very tall), making mum and dad always so proud of her. Her noisy ass always has something to say to me too, and makes sure that whatever I share online comes in her greedy hands and my mothers ones as well-hence why she has been calling me so much this night. Of course this has to do something with the picture I have shared of Noah and I-she absolutely does not agree with her brainwashed Christian mind that I work for a band like Bad Omens. Noah-and the rest of the band-do not know everything much by detail, something I for now want to keep it that way, as I am not very fond of talking about my family and our history.

‘That woman again?’ he huffs, shaking his head in slight disbelief of my words. ‘She's such a pain in the ass… What does she want this time?’

‘She probably wants to know why the hell I posed with you like that on our selfie,’ I sigh out of annoyance. ‘Hailey, how can you work for guys looking like that? Hailey, they are covered in tattoos, please tell me you will not do the same! Hailey, how can you work with guys worshiping the devil?’ I mock my mothers words in her annoyingly so called worried voice, the words being something she repeats to me so many times whenever she has the chance to talk to me.

Noah groans in annoyance and rolls his eyes at the sound of my mothers remarks. I know that the woman never fails to astound him. ‘Jesus Christ,’ he curses with a low voice, pinching the bridge of his nose as if I just said something that’s giving him a headache. Well, my mother sure as hell gives me that nine out of ten times.

‘Can’t you just ignore your mother at times? Just until she finally gets the fucking message? Like… how do you even keep up with her bullshit?’

‘Ha, good joke,’ I mumble at him. ‘Nah, if I don’t respond in a few days, she just calls my aunt, because she knows me and my aunt get along way better and that knows more about how I’m currently doing than my mom does. God, I wish she could just accept the fact that I’m an adult and have, and can have, my own life,’ I explain with annoyance.

The more I talk about my mother, the more Noah also seems to become annoyed with the situation, as if he knows where I’m talking about. ‘Damn,’ he groans after I just finished speaking, pinching the bridge of his nose out of stress.

‘Your mom is one annoying human being, you know that?’ he half jokes, but gives me an apologetic look after.

‘Oh trust me-I know,’ I say back, sighing. ‘It's one of the reasons I had no problem getting kicked out by her when she didn’t want me living with her and the rest of the family anymore, back when I was a teen. That’s why I moved from the UK all the way here in America to start a better life with my aunt.’

Noah listens to the words I speak, the annoyance on his face slowly fading away a bit more. ‘I have to say… I still gotta respect you for that. That’s kind of impressive, honestly,’ he softly jokes with a smirk, now nudging his shoulder against me, seeming to try to lessen my stress and annoyance because of my mother by doing so.

‘Anyone would want to escape from that woman,’ I mumble. ‘And somehow I was the bad guy. Just because I didn’t agree nor believe in her oh so holy Christian beliefs when I grew up,’ I mockingly say.

‘Oh God… your mother is one of those Christians?’ Noah asks, the annoyed expression on his face reappearing immediately as he hears me telling about it. ‘Jesus… No wonder she doesn’t like us then. She probably sees us as some kind of Satan worshippers,’ he grumbles out, rolling his eyes.

I can’t help but snort at his words as I nod. ‘Yeah, and she now thinks that I am too. I bet that she probably tried to call me because she saw our picture, all panicked because you ‘lured me into your Satanic beliefs’ or something,’ I say, trying to let the last words sound all spooky to mock my mom and joke about the situation.

It makes a genuine chuckle leave Noah’s lips as I do so. ‘Ha, yeah, that’s exactly it…’ he says with a wide smirk, now shaking his head. ‘Your mom makes everything sound so much worse than it actually is… I mean.. we’re not as evil as she makes us out to be, are we?’ he then jokes.

‘Of course not,’ I laugh, shaking my head. ‘But yeah, she was not exactly thrilled that I have a job as a stylist working for a metal band.’

Noah rolls his eyes as I say that. ‘Your mom is always so over dramatic about everything man, whenever I hear you talk about her… honestly, a girl your age shouldn’t have to worry about keeping her mother from being so dramatic and stressed about her life choices,’ he tells me, smiling with a chuckle, and I know that he means well with those words.

‘I know. It’s just… we have been through a lot together, so sometimes it still kinda hurts that she just won't love and accept me for who I am, or the choices I make and how I decide to live my life,’ I shrug, trying to talk casually about it. As I do, the slight playful smile on Noah’s face turns into a more empathetic and understanding one. He seems to frown at the thought of it, and his brows furrow slightly at the sight of me trying to seem all casual about the situation.

‘Well… it’s her loss,’ he tells me after with a shrug as he shoves his hands in his pockets, now looking at me with an expression that looks a lot more compassionate.

‘Guess so. I mean, my aunt is more of a mother to me anyways,’ I mumble, and then sigh as I click on my mothers name on my phone, just to simply text her back: ‘Don’t have time to talk right now, mum. I’ll call you back when I can find the right moment.’

Noah moves a bit closer to me now after I hit the send button, putting his hand on my shoulder and gently squeezing it to comfort me. ‘There you go,’ he chuckles softly as his eyes gaze over my phone. ‘Hopefully that’s enough to keep her from bugging you for the rest of the night.’

‘Yeah… And otherwise I’ll just turn my notifications off,’ I shrug, and then click on the two texts that I have gotten from my best friend Sarah a couple of hours ago.

‘Girl, since when do you have a boyfriend?? How come it’s Noah?? I know you told me you find him hot and all but oh my god??’

‘Pleaseee text me back asap, I want to know everything!! The tea is hot and I’m sat’

I roll my eyes as I chuckle a bit when I read her texts. Of course Sarah wants to know every detail about what happened, which is fair since we haven’t been able to catch up for a while.

I suddenly hear Noah clear his throat, making me look up from my phone to look at him. He casually-or at least, tries to-walks next to me with his hands still in his pockets, the smirk on his face growing by the second. I raise my eyebrows, as I ask him: ‘What’s so funny?’

He shakes his head and he then meets my gaze, his smirk still big. ‘Nothing,; he says all innocently, the playful glint reappearing in his eyes. ‘It's just… I saw the text from your friend,’ he chuckles, now pointing at the phone in my hand.

I chuckle, while I smile. ‘Oh yeah, she saw the picture of us together. She of course wants to know all the details.’

‘I figured…’ he laughs now, his smirk becoming more and more cocky. ‘Not gonna lie though. I feel honored by the fact that you told her you think I’m hot,’ he admits cockily and winks at me.

My eyes turn a bit wide when I look from him, to my phone, and then back to him, my cheeks turning a deep red color. ‘I… Well…’ I begin to stammer, feeling a bit embarrassed and caught. ‘It’s not polite to just stare at someone’s phone, y’know,’ I just try to casually say, pretending to not be affected by his words.

Noah just starts laughing loudly now as he notices the look on my face, seeming to of course enjoy every second of seeing me flustered at what he just said. ‘Sorry, I just couldn’t help it,’ he chuckles, shrugging his shoulders and then looking at me with a mischievous smirk and teasing glint in his eyes.

‘Hmm. I’ll just let it slip for now, Sebastian,’ I say with one raised eyebrow, deciding to just tease him back.

‘Oh, you will?’ Noah shoots back with still that smirk on his face and raised eyebrow on his own, shaking his head slightly with a chuckle as he looks down at me with a cocky yet amused look on his face. ‘How kind of you.’

The teasing smile on his face grows wider as he again chuckles, the playfulness in his eyes making him more flirtatious and mischievous than ever.

‘Oh shut up you. I need a drink now,’ I mumble, hoping the red in my face will quickly disappear, as we make our way to the afterparty in the building.

Noah again laughs at the sight of the red on my cheeks. For a second his eyes take in my appearance, as he smirks once again. ‘I can get you a drink,’ he responds, then looking at me with a challenging twinkle in his eyes. ‘If you manage to keep yourself from looking at me, and my hot body full of tattoos of course,’ he says so teasingly-of course still referring to my Sarah’s text that exposed me-that it makes me roll my eyes for a second.

‘Oh, I can easily do that,’ I say while narrowing my eyes at him, my voice sounding slightly playful.

‘You think so?’ Noah shoots back with a grin, now tilting his face slightly to give me a challenging look while he still walks next to me. ‘I doubt it. My tattoos are way too cool not to look at, and a cute little thing like you? I can practically bet money on it that you’ll give in after just a few seconds.’

He is clearly testing me and trying to get a reaction out of me with his teasing yet daring words, so I just snort at him. ‘Oh please. A few seconds? A bit cocky today, are we now, Noah?’

‘Cocky? Or confident? I’d say I’m confident,’ he shoots back, smirking proudly. ‘There is quite a difference, you know?’ he then chuckles.

We are nearing the small backstage area that will lead to the afterparty as we talk. The private bar is located for those who are allowed backstage, which I am thanks to our backstage passes and Noah bringing me with him. We walk towards the toilets as we are inside.

‘You wait here please, I’m going to change into something more party-like real quick,’ I say as I walk into a toilet stall and lock the door behind me.

I quickly get out of my simple work tee and pants, getting my strapless maroon dress with open back that’s folded neatly out of my small-but yet big enough that I can fit a couple of things inside-shoulder bag that I’ve brought with me. The dress looks quite nice on me as I say so myself-the dress hugs my curves and lets my roundings from front and back stand out very well. After that I put on some matching heels that are nice looking yet not too uncomfortable to walk and stand on, and after that I put a hand through my hair to get it to look a little more nice. When I feel good about my looks I walk out of the toilet stall, seeing Noah waiting for me while he scrolls on his phone.

‘Tadaaa,’ I say, spinning around quickly so he can see my look.

As Noah hears the sound of the toilet stall door opening, he looks up from his phone and puts it back in the backpocket of his jeans, and as soon as his eyes fall on me walking out of the stall and my little spin, his eyes go a little wider as his jaw drops a little.

‘Oh wow…’ is all he seems to be able to say as he takes in my form, his eyes looking me up and down. He is not even trying to hide the smirk that is appearing on his face after, as he then slowly shakes his head while taking me in once more.

It makes me smirk broadly myself when I see his reaction, jokingly saying: ‘And weren’t you the one saying that I would be the one not being able to keep my hands off you?’

‘I’m pretty sure those words did leave my mouth, yes,’ he responds, his smirk only widening when he hears my sassy comment. ‘And I don’t think I've ever been proven more wrong, honestly,’ he says as his eyes take in every inch of my body again in my dress, not even hiding the way he is practically admiring my every feature right now.

‘Just wait. I bet I can spend the whole evening without touching you. You in? Or are you afraid to lose?’ I mischievously smile at him.

‘Oh now that…’ -he lets out a devious chuckle at my question, the glint in his eyes only growing more and more mischievous as well as he takes a step closer towards me- ‘...that sounds like a challenge.’

As he speaks further, he looks at me through his eyelashes. ‘One I’m gladly willing to accept, even,’ he says huskily, his expression turning darker as he shoots me a naughty smirk.

‘Okay…’ I start, now also taking a few steps closer to him as I return his smirk. ‘Then it goes in now,’ I whisper into his ear when I stand on my toes to reach it, and then when I stand back normally again I look at him through my eyelashes with a seductive look.

‘Oh yeah? I hope you’re preparing yourself to lose then,’ he smirks as he again moves a bit closer to me, leaning in as his face hovers closely to my own, the devilish look on his face showing he’s gonna try his absolute best to make me break the rule. He wishes.

‘Hmm… I think I will be fine,’ I say as I narrow my eyes with a naughty smile, before turning around to walk away, knowing very well that my behind and moving curves are perfectly displayed in the dress I’m wearing.

‘Ha, we’ll see about that,’ I hear Noah mumble behind him, making me shake my head and chuckle to myself.

I walk towards the bar to order myself my first drink, noticing that a few guys standing around the bar at the order side are eyeing my chest more than my eyes, which makes me look at them with a nasty look before turning my back at them, focusing on a talk with my female colleagues I then spot. They excitedly and happily tell me their congratulations when I tell them about the nomination I got from the SMA's.

‘That’s so exciting,’ a light skinned girl from my age, Pearl, tells me when I tell her about the interview and photoshoot that comes with it. Her dark, curly hair is clipped behind her ears, and she wears a short, shiny, light blue-greenish dress that compliments her body and brown skin very well.

‘Tell me about it,’ I smile. ‘Have to admit though, that I’m also quite nervous about it…’

‘Oh yeah, that’s very logical, it’s your first interview for something like this, right?’

I nod, and Pearl returns it with an understanding but reassuring smile. ‘I’m absolutely sure everything will go just fine. Also…’ she now leans more into me, making me lean more towards her as well, and her eyes now wander to Noah standing in the corner of the room with a drink, alongside Nick and another guy they are talking to.

‘Things are getting more serious, huh?’ she smirks. ‘I’ve always wondered if you guys got something going on, to be honest… With the way you two always act around each other and such,’ she adds, making me blush a little.

‘Really?’ I nervously ask, and Pearl nods at me.

‘Yeah… I mean, girl-have you seen the way Noah looks at you? I wish a guy could look at me like that,’ she laughs, and I join her, while also feeling a bit warm about the way Noah seems to look at me when I don’t notice.

‘I just…’ I begin to stumble, feeling a little stuck if I could tell my new madly friend a bit of the truth, since Noah and I aren’t really officially out yet. But by the way she looks at me with such a kind and honest look, I decide that I will, also desperately wanting to share my thoughts and feelings with someone about all of this.

‘Well, let’s say I developed a little crush on him since the day I started working for him and the band,’ I shyly laugh as I begin to explain everything to her, making Pearl knowingly smirk at me. Goddammit. ‘And… when he started returning the jokes I made towards him, and our bond became closer, the jokes just turned a little more into teasing and sometimes even flirting as well… It has been going on for months now, and I couldn’t help but always had some sort of hope because of that, that he likes me back and all…’

‘Well, he obviously does,’ Pearl laughs while she shakes her head at me, taking a sip of her drink. ‘Like c’mon, everyone can tell. The tension between you two…’

I blush one again because of her words, nervously twirling a lock of hair around my finger. ‘You think so?’

‘Duh!’ she certainly exclaims, making me giggle a little, taking a few sips of my drink as well.

‘Well… Something may have happened between us last night…’ I say a little softer now with again a small giggle, making Pear’s eyes turn wide out of curiosity and excitement.

‘Hello-tell me everything!’ Pear exclaims as she seems to almost want to jump up and down of everything I have just been telling, making me try to calm her down as I shoot her a little awkward smile.

‘Okay so…’ I begin, as I take a deep breath with the corners of my mouth curling up again. ‘Me and Noah slept together last night. The night before this show, I mean.’

‘GIRL!’ Pearl now beams because of my words, which makes a couple of people look at both me and her, and as I laugh at her I again try to calm her down by shushing her.

‘How was it?!’ she now wants to know, making me look at Noah again for a moment, still standing in the corner of the room with Nick and the other guy. As soon as his eyes lock with mine, I can’t help but swoon a little when I think back of our intimate moment last night. It also doesn’t help that he winks at me, making me quickly shoot my eyes at Pearl again as I grin with slight colored cheeks. And, it makes me shoot back a lot more of my drink, making me squeeze my eyes shut for a couple of seconds.

‘Trust me… Noah is like some kind of God in bed, and I’m not even religious,’ I slur a little now that the alcohol starts kicking it, making me giggle like some in love teenager, and Pearl groans out of playful jealousy and excitement.

‘Damn girl. Noah Sebastian and Hailey Clark slept together… I must say, you two make quite the attractive couple…’ Pearl then winks at me as she said those words, and I blush for what feels like the hundredth time this night.

‘You think so?’ I ask Pearl whilst still being flattered about it, and she heavily nods.

‘C’mon, look at you two, being handsome and everything,’ she cheers, making me laugh behind my hand.

‘Yeah… Noah is quite handsome indeed,’ I answer, my mind trailing off to daydream about him-shirtless, touching me, kissing me… which then reminds me of the bet me and Noah made, so I quickly try to snap out of my unholy daydreams.

‘You don’t have to tell me twice,’ Pearl giggles, and when we say our goodbyes after because she spots someone else she knows, I walk towards Noah and the other guys he is standing with, with now a wine glass in my hands after I ordered it.

As Noah sees me walking towards him and the others, a devilish smirk appears on his face immediately. When I stand next to him, he glances at me, his eyes slowly trailing over my form, before coming back towards my face again while the smirk on his face only widens.

‘Hi there,’ I greet him with a sly smile, and then nod as a greeting to the others.

‘Noah was just about to tell us about that time you were absolutely shit faced and me and Jolly had to carry him to our hotel room ourselves, right Noah?’ Nick says with a playful smile towards him, making the other guys in the circle laugh and I can’t help but chuckle softly as well.

Noah rolls his eyes at Nick, but the smile still remains on his face as he slowly shakes his head. ‘Yeah, yeah, very funny,’ he says, ‘I can still remember the both of you had to carry me, and I mean I can’t help it if I’m a little weak to alcohol sometimes, can I?’ he now shoots back with a chuckle, and gives me a teasing look after as he turns to look at me again.

‘Ah, no of course not Noah,’ Nick chuckles and I shake my head with a little laughter, my head now filled with an image of Noah having to be carried to the hotel room by Nick and Jolly, it was probably a funny moment.

‘How sad that I missed that moment,’ I now smirk at Noah, leaning towards him just a little, so our hips almost touch each other.

My words make him raise an eyebrow with a small, playful smile. ‘Oh, I’m sure we can arrange that this will happen another time,’ he chuckles, returning my smirk and mirroring my action by leaning just a little closer to me as well, our hips now inches apart. Interesting move, Sebastian.

‘Well, make sure that I won’t miss it this time then,’ I wink, as I then take a sip of my wine. ‘But please not tonight though… I do not really look forward to having to carry you with that other idiot,’ I say, pointing at Nick, who pretends to be offended by my words.

Noah laughs at my comment, shaking his head as he looks over at Nick. ‘You hear that, Nick? Hailey doesn’t want to carry me with you, or the both of us I think,’ he teases Nick with a chuckle, earning him a small punch against his shoulder and a laugh.

‘I think she would rather have you carry her home instead, mate,’ Nick jokes while jokingly slapping against his shoulder a few times before leaving with the other guys, making me shake my head with a little laugh. Noah does the same, his eyes now trailing back to me. He raises an eyebrow as his eyes meet mine again.

‘So, little mouse, you want me to carry you home instead, huh?’ he says, a smirk visible on his face again as he starts to lean even closer towards me, but this time from the front.

‘Maybe… too bad we still have that bet going on, though,’ I teasingly yet daringly smirk at him, putting both my hands behind my bag.

His eyes widen a little as I mention the best, and he lets out a sigh after-a frustrated and amused sigh-as if he forgot our bet for a moment. ‘Oh I know…’ he says, sounding just a little tired, while he trails one of his fingers over my shoulder in the air, then over my chest, and stops it as it’s just inches away from my skin. ‘Do you have an idea how much I have to keep myself back from touching you right now, mouse, hm?’

‘Is that you saying that I’m gonna win the bet?’ I say as the corners of my mouth curl even more upwards.

A low and frustrated groan leaves Noah’s mouth as he looks away, taking a sip of his drink, before looking back at me with narrowed eyes. ‘Don’t be so full of yourself, mouse. I’m going to win-I always win,’ he says in a low voice, before leaning closer again, his thumb now rubbing over my bottom lip… making me almost explode by amusement, but also sexual frustration.

‘Yet… here you are… Already losing,’ I say, smiling against his thumb.

He then freezes as he hears me, and his jaw drops slightly, making me bite my lip harshly to hold myself back from laughing madly. He slowly looks down at his thumb against my lip, then back at my face.

‘I… Oh for fucks sake, I…’ Noah tries to stumble out, before letting go of his glass that he quickly sets down on a small table next to us with his other hand, reaching for my waist with it instead. I squeal, giggling when he grabs me by the waist to push me frustratedly against his body.

‘Oh, how I love to see you frustrated like that,’ I smirk evilly, a playful twinkle in my eyes.

He groans again, his hands trailing onto my waist with a firm grip as he presses himself close against me. ‘You’re enjoying this quite a lot, aren’t you? Seeing me being so frustrated like this…’ he whispers in my ears, his breath ghosting over my skin.

‘I quite do actually, yeah,’ I smirk, looking him straight into his eyes as he leans back from my ear. His eyes lock with mine, and he lets out yet another groan as he shakes his head, closing his eyes as he rests his forehead against mine.

‘God, it just makes me want to kiss you all over, mouse. It’s driving me insane…’ he whispers, as his hands now slide up and down my waist.

‘Not here in public, right?’ I teasingly dare him, and he huffs as his hands suddenly tighten the grip at my waist, his teeth gritting a little while he slightly shakes his head.

‘God… don’t tempt me. Not here, not now, or it will make me lose this bet I made-which starts over again now, by the way. I am not gonna lose again…’

‘Hmm, alright alright, calm down… I won’t tempt you,’ I say with a little mischievous smile, slowly taking a few steps away from him towards the dance floor in the middle of the room, which makes him drop his hands again. ‘Let’s see how good you are at keeping your words as I dance, okay?’

Noah takes a few deep breaths in through his nose, trying to calm himself down again as he watches me walking to the dance floor. ‘Oh, you’re a teasing little thing, aren’t you now…’

‘Maybe,’ I wink over my shoulder, and a tipsy giggle leaves my mouth when I enter the dance floor, beginning to move my hips and making my body feel loose as I dance along to the music in between the crowd.

My hands move over my body to my hair as I get lost in the music, my dress sliding up a little as I do so. I keep eye contact with Noah as I then confidently yet seductively dance.

Noah bites his lip as he sees my dress ride up just a little, and I see him mutter ‘Jesus Christ’ to himself as I look at his lips, a little goran leaving him as his eyes never once leave mine. I see him fight the urge to walk over to me at first, but he decides to do so as he says: ‘You really just can’t stay innocent, can you…’

‘Guess not,’ I say as I then teasingly stick my tongue out to him. A smirk returns to his face as soon as he sees me doing that, running his fingers through his hair as his eyes rake over my figure yet again.

‘You’re going to be the demise of me. You know that, don’t you?’ he says, almost growling slightly at the end.

‘Mhm,’ I giggle with a small nod, now dancing close to his body as I let my hips loose again. A low and frustrated groan leaves his mouth once more, and he can’t take his eyes away from my body, which is only moving closer and closer towards his body, almost inches apart. I love this, I love it so much to frustrate him and tease him so hard like this, seeing him struggle with the desire and need I am building up through him more and more.

And the moment I come close to him when I let my hips loose he can’t take his eyes away from my body, making him seem more and more frustrated by the second. His hands then immediately reach out to my hips, and his fingers dig into my flesh as he lets out a deep grumble. When he pushes me against him, a small gasp leaves my mouth, grinning because I won-once again. His eyes flutter close as he feels my body against his, and his breaths grow deeper. But the smirk soon disappears from his face again though, as his eyes suddenly widen, now realizing as well that he just reached out to me again without even noticing he just did it. It makes me feel quite confident and powerful if I’m honest, and I playfully grind against him a little while I dance, and when I can feel his pants tighten because of that I smirk broadly.

‘Oh for f…’ he mutters, not finishing his sentence when he bites his lip out of frustration, looking like he wants to start walking away, but he then suddenly stops in his tracks when he feels me grinding against him. It makes him bite his lip once again, his grip on my hips tightening.

‘I love how I can wrap you around my finger just like that,’ I grin when I turn around to face him again, playfully giving his nose a boop. ‘It’s just so easy…’ I then say, resting my arms in his neck as a mischievous smile appears on my face yet again.

Noah groans again and rolls his eyes at my comment, but his breath hitches slightly as he feels my arms around his neck. He shakes his head again, a smirk appearing on his face.

‘You’re a menace. You know that, right?’ he then replies to me, before quickly removing my arms again and cursing under his breath when he realizes he’s just once again touching me without even noticing. Oh, how I love this.

‘Well, there I go-losing yet again,’ he mumbles, ‘and that in front of all these people as well…’

‘Fuck them,’ I shrug at his words. ‘I mean, they apparently kinda noticed already that something is going on between us-so I’ve heard-and everyone probably saw our picture together as well… So, just turn that little anxious brain of yours off, yeah?’ I smirk, feeling myself definitely getting tipsy now as I blurt out these words.

Noah’s nostrils flare as he seems to realize how drunk of confidence I am getting of my drinks, and it clearly gets too much for him as he gives his head a firm shake with a groan. His hands grip my hips again as I still stand in front of him with a teasing and knowing grin, having him say:

‘Fine. I can’t fight it anymore. Just… just go crazy, I guess.’

His eyes are almost turning dark with desire, making me slightly chuckle at him. ‘Good. I will, as long as you’ll join me,’ I grin.

Noah bites his lips for a second before a devilish smirk appears on his face as well, and a dark look appears in his eyes.

‘Oh doll… You know I will,’ he says in a low, growly voice, his eyes raking up and down my body. ‘Now come here.’

I am so turned on by his words and dark gaze alone, so it makes me jump into his arms without thinking about it, wrapping my legs around his body instinctively, making him carry us from the dance room to another, small dark room, with just some dim red lights and little furniture. We both don’t really seem to care about where we are, we just want to feel each other-as soon as he closes the door behind him, he takes no more time as he pushes me against the wall, his body pinned flushed against me between the wall and him. He places his hands on my waist and groans deeply as he buries his face into my neck, making a moan already escape from my lips as he begins to kiss my neck, closing my eyes out of pleasure right away.

The sounds of my moan is all he needs to hear, and he starts sucking on my skin, his hands running over my body while he pins himself even closer against me. ‘You don’t know how bad you got me craving to touch you like this with those dance moves of yours, little mouse,’ he whispers in between kisses all over my neck.

I roll my eyes back by hearing him speak those words to me and run my fingers through his hair, as I enjoy every single kiss on my sensitive skin. His own breaths grow deeper and deeper as he kisses and sucks all over my neck now, his hands sliding all over my body as he presses himself even more flush against me.

‘God, you’re driving me wild, doll, you know that?’ he groans lowly, his teeth grazing over my neck. His words alone drive me absolutely wild and hot, so I grab his face to hungirly kiss him.

He lets out an approving groan against my mouth as mine meets his, before kissing me back just as passionately as if he has been craving this all night. ‘Fuck,’ he then hisses against my mouth as his hands hold onto my hips fiercely now.

The combination of his cursing and his tongue circling around mine makes me moan deeply in response, and by the way he keeps pressing our bodies closer and closer together until there is no single space left, my dress keeps on sliding higher and higher.

Noah’s grip on my hips just keeps on tightening as he feels the fabric ride up as well. ‘God damn-it’s so hard to keep that promise just to keep my fucking hands off you right now…’

‘Fuck that promise, honest to God,’ I mumble with a hoarse voice, wanting and needing him to touch and kiss me everywhere at this point.

‘You don’t have to tell me twice… I can’t keep my hands off you even if I wanted to,’ Noah groans against my mouth, his hands now wandering up and down my body as he keeps me pinned between himself and the wall.

I can feel Noah’s hands moving to the part where my dress is raised, tucking on the waist of my underwear, making me smirk against his lips a little. ‘Oh, you want me that bad, do you now?’

His breath hitches as he feels the fabric of my panties, and he bites his lips for a second when they leave mine, his big, hard bulge pressing the inner part of my thigh as he looks into my eyes.

‘Is that even a question, doll?’ he smirks back. ‘You have been teasing me all damn night, and now we’re finally here alone together, all mine…’

The feeling of him getting hard as he is pressed against me makes me a hot wet mess, and before he can say anything else again I already take my panties off, craving him more by the second. His eyes grow wider as he watches me do so, letting out a shaky and needing breath, his eyes looking over my entire form. ‘God…’

His hands move more lower, feeling the outer part of my core, making me gasp and shiver, and I slowly moan as he begins rubbing it. My eyes squeeze shut, enjoying the pleasure so much. He lets out a groan as his fingers explore my center, watching my facial expressions as I let out my moans.

‘You really are such a vision,’ he whispers in a low, husky voice as his fingers start moving in slow, circular motions over me.

And for fucks sake, his hand and fingers are heavenly on and inside of me, so I begin to turn into a heavy panting mess. He smirks as he sees how good I am feeling, still taking in every expression I make, not being able to take his eyes off me.

‘God, that’s it,’ he encourages as my breathing becomes even heavier, his words shooting to my core right away. Noah then doesn’t hesitate as he unbelts his pants with his other hands as he keeps his eyes on his fingers inside of me. His pants slide down his knees and he smoothly pulls off his boxers after, unraveling his length being very excited to wanting to enter me himself, making me smirk widely and evilly.

‘You’re quite an excited boy yourself, hm?’ I say as I shoot him a playful wink.

‘You wouldn’t guess how excited you’ve been making me all night, baby,’ he replies, his voice hoarse and full of lust now. I whimper just by hearing those ungodly yet for me holy words alone, and when he finally enters inside of me in a fast movement full of desire, my mouth jaw drops open full of overwhelming pleasure hitting me right away.

His head suddenly drops to the crook of my neck as his breaths get deeper and faster, and he grips onto my waist again to hold himself steady. ‘Oh, God,’ he groans out loud.

As he moves fastly in and out of me, the sound of our skin connecting fills the room, and with every movement he makes I moan and pant faster and harder. Noah presses his forehead against mine now so he can look into my eyes, the pleasure growing more and more with every movement now.

‘Hailey,’ he grunts out my name, his hands holding even more onto my waist. Every time I think our sex can’t get even hotter than the last, Noah always seems to be able to surprise me by getting wilder and loser every time we get intimate again, and I swear that I am almost a leaking mess around his length inside of me.

‘Noah,’ I moan his name back out loud as he keeps thrusting inside of me. His own breathing becomes faster and faster just like mine, as if his own breathing can’t even keep up with his own movements. I’m drowning in our heath and pleasure, and he closes his eyes as he groans against my mouth.

As I open my eyes my gaze locks with his for a few seconds, his eyes dark with lust and a devilish smile spreading on his face before his eyes squeeze shut, making me feel like he is very close to the edge as well.

‘Not yet,’ I then hear him murmur towards himself, and he then suddenly in a quick movement lets me go, making my heels clack against the tile floor for a second before he spins me around to press my body against the wall. I just gasp out of surprise yet also excitement, as his length enters me from behind with a quick, fluid movement. He pulls a low growl from his throat as he grips my hips tightly again, and it’s like he is overflowing with lust for me right now-he thrusts into me again with a fast pace, making my jaw fall wide open as I can’t hold back my loud moans, making me fall his name over my lips a couple of times as well.

‘Yeah, that’s me,’ he whispers in my ear in a low voice, his breath quickening even more as he moves against me with an even faster pace than before. ‘You know how bad I have been wanting to do this to you all day, ever since I saw you in my dressing room again? Imagining all the things I could do to your body as I was still on stage?’ he groans out, and I grip around him tighter with his thrusts.

And God, I almost can’t handle the pleasure mixed with his hot words all at once, as I cry out my pleasure to him. ‘Fucking hell,’ I groan, trying to keep standing on both my feet as he keeps moving in and out of me.

He lets out a moan against my neck, his hands trailing from my hips to my thighs for a second. ‘You like it, don’t you, doll?’ he whispers with his lips against my neck, turning my head around towards his face so he can give me a sloppy and teasing kiss. ‘You want me so damn bad, don’t you?’

I moan out loud just by his words alone again, and heavily nod as I do. ‘So bad,’ I breathe out with a high pitched voice, ‘always so bad.’

Hearing me saying that seems to make him feel even more excited, as he grips into my hips even tighter, pressing me right against him.

‘You’re mine… all mine,’ he mutters to me with another hungry kiss, his tongue entering my mouth. And that then makes me hit my climax hard, making me squeeze my eyes shut, panting and moaning out the pleasure that hits me, as my arms turn around to grab his bicep, almost digging my nails deeply into his skin, my legs shaking in the moment.

His head drops inside the crook of my neck, his own breathing heavy and quick as he can feel me gripping around him so tightly, gripping onto me tighter as he feels my nails in his bicep. His hair is lightly brushing against my neck as he tries to just take deep breaths, while he groans deeply and loudly as he lets every moment of our pleasure hit him all at once.

‘God, babe,’ he mutters against my skin, not even having the breath for more words right now.

‘Come for me,’ I whisper to him as I still try to catch my own breath, my wet spot almost already drooling all over again by the sight of him getting overwhelmed with his own pleasure. He immediately moans at the words that I tell him, his head burying his face into the crook of my neck again as that alone sends him to the edge. He then slowly pulls out of me, making me turn around so we can share a few more sloppy and hungrily kisses, and after that we let each other go again so we can both catch our breath. A smug grin appears on Noah’s face as he notices that I am still out of breath as well.

‘Fucking hell,’ I breathe out, ‘I have to kick these out for a few minutes if you don’t mind,’ I say with a small chuckle as I kick my heels off-my legs are currently way too shake to be able to still stand on my heels right now.

Noah just shakes his head, not bothering to actually reply, and a chuckle escapes his lips as well as he takes a few more heavy, deep breaths and looks at me. ‘Not at all,’ he then lets out, smiling sweetly as his hands softly caresses one side of my face, making sure I have him to lean onto while I get used to having my feet firmly onto the ground-as if he didn’t just fuck my brains out a minute ago.

I stand next to Noah in silence, blinking a few times as I get in thought. I knew he did not ever lie with the confidence and smoothness he always carried around him, but damn-he can be very wild, seductive and hot as hell when it comes to sex. Not gonna lie, I have always liked it rough and dirty as well, but I have never met someone who reached and needed that same level as me, until I met Noah and got intimate with him. And I’m actually glad, because it always made me feel as if I had to be ashamed of the intense and seductive way I like to be intimate with someone.

I can feel him looking back at me, smiling as he sees my flushed face, his eyes then slipping to my lips, that probably look slightly chewed and messy after our passionate make-out session. He smiles even wider as his big arms wrap themselves around my waist loosely, and he places a sweet kiss against my forehead.

‘You good to stand?’ he asks, a small teasing tone to his voice, but still very sweet and genuine overall.

‘Yeah… I’m fine now,’ I chuckle, and I give him a deep, long kiss before I get on my heels again. ‘Show must go on,’ I huff when I look down at them, stroking my short dress neat again, and then looking at the small mirror hanging randomly hanging in the quite empty, all black room, so I can make sure my hair is somewhat decent looking enough for others to look at again.

‘Show must go on,’ he repeats my sentence, his hand reaching forwards to help fix my hair a bit, softly stroking through them. I enjoy his now soft, gentle hands stroking through my hair, almost closing my eyes as he does so.

‘Mhm,’ I just answer with a small smile, playing a bit nervously with my fingers. This intense, intimate moment got me thinking, worrying and wondering all over again about what it all means-or what it shouldn’t mean, in such a short moment of us trying to calm down our bodies again. It makes me feel anxious-and also afraid, I guess-in such a short second, that it feels like it tightens up my throat, all because of my feelings for him bubbling up again, getting stronger and stronger with every private moment we have.

‘You sure you alright?’ he asks with a slight teasing tone to his voice, but also with just a hint of concern, as he sees through me. ‘You seem a little nervous.’

‘Well…’ I begin with a sigh while I nervously tuck a few strands of still messy hair behind my ears, my feet now ticking on the floor. ‘I just have been wondering something tonight… well, actually for a couple of nights now I guess…’

Noah glances over at me, his eyebrows slowly raising up, as his expression changes to curiosity. ‘And what have you been wondering?’

My gaze then lowers towards the floor, my heart beginning to pound a little faster, as I am anxious for this conversation and the subject itself, and for all the answers I could possibly get-or not get.

‘I have been wondering how you have been feeling. About all of this…’

As I say the last words, I dare to look up at him again. ‘You and me, I mean. Us. Or if there’s no us. Or if there will be an us, or not, or if you like me or not, if you are even into dating at all,’ I continue to nervously ramble at him.

His expression turns a little softer as he understands what I want to talk about, and he then gives me a sweet smile, before he slowly approaches me again.

‘Hey,’ he says, now just softly tilting my head up by my chin, looking into my eyes. ‘I like you. A lot,’ he answers me with confidence, smiling softly as he looks at me.

I can’t help but smile back right away as I hear those words, whilst feeling shy and flustered, my heart beating as if I just ran the marathon. ‘You do…? Really?’

He smiles as his thumb softly strokes over my cheek while he keeps his hand at my chin, holding my face so I can look straight at him. ‘Do you really think I would just kiss you, tease you and touch you like this every time, if I don’t like you?’ he asks as he smirks, teasing me on purpose. Of course.

I let out a chuckle, but bite my lip anxiously after. ‘Yeah… It’s just… I wondered if you also feel more than just being attracted to me, I mean.’

‘I am attracted to you,’ he says as he still smirks, his eyes lighting up a little bit as he can’t seem to help but flirt a little with me again to make the mood a little bit lighter, my anxiety clearly being strongly present. ‘But I know what you mean. Well… I don’t do just stuff like this with everyone or anyone, trust me on that,’ he smiles.

‘And I know what it looks like,’ he then adds after I just give him silence as a response. ‘And yeah, I guess in a way it could make me look like someone who just doesn’t care about commitment that much, right?’

I shrug at that, but my stupid anxious mind still does not have the right answer it is looking for. He again smiles, seeing how nervously I am still about getting the answer I need. His hand moves from my cheek to to the small of my back, bringing me closer to him.

‘What I am trying to say, and ask you Hailey…’ he starts, looking down at me with all the confidence he has. ‘If you would like to get together… Exclusively.’

As my heart beats madly by hearing those words from him, a big and happy smile grows on my face. Yet, I still can’t help but tease him: ‘Still not taking me on an official date first?’ I smirk, but before he can even answer my joke I already wrap my arms tightly around him, while I muffle in his shirt: ‘You know I’d want nothing else but be with you.’

He lets out a breath of relief when he feels my arms wrap around him, squeezing me a little together. ‘Me too. Nothing else but you,’ he whispers against my hair, placing a kiss against it as my head rests against his chest. ‘You're mine.’

It feels like my heart explodes by hearing his words, warmth spreading across my chest as I smile even wider. His head ducks down, tilting mine upwards as he places another soft yet passionate kiss against my lips, his hands now softly stroking my waist and back just as lovingly.

‘I very much love to be yours,’ I smile back against his lips after he presses kiss after kiss on me.

‘All mine,’ he mumbles against my lips, his own brushing against mine again after he said that, just teasing me with the touch more than properly kissing me right now.

‘Yours,’ I say back with a small chuckle, and then slowly get myself out of his grip. I begin to jawn, slightly blushing after out of embarrassment. ‘Sorry. The concert, party, the drinks and…’ I smirk a little as I take a small pause, ‘our activity, has very much exhausted me.’

He smirks as I yawn, rubbing his hand up and down my arm. ‘Well, we do need to get up early tomorrow,’ he says with a sigh, and lets out a small chuckle after that. ‘Maybe it is smarter to go home and get some proper rest, right?’

‘Yeah, guess so,’ I lazily smile back. ‘Also,’ I then start, as I pat him on the chest in a playful manner, ‘you have completely gotten our tour schedule rotten in your head, haven’t you?’ I joke with a small grin.

‘Tonight was the last show. We have a break for like a week now. Which means…’ I stop for a second, to excitedly throw my hands in the air as I chant: ‘Sleeping in!’

Noah softly laughs at my playful tone, shaking his head. ‘Awww, man,’ he groans right away, a sarcastic grin on his face as he jokingly frowns about it. ‘That’s a damn shame-because I was looking forward to spending another day with you,’ he smirks, his hands wrapping around my waist loosely, pulling me closer to him.

‘I mean, that can be arranged,’ I smirk back at him. ‘We can spend tomorrow together, y’know, if you’d like.’

He smiles at my suggestion. ‘Yeah… I would love that,’ he smirks, his hands now softly slipping under the back neckline of my dress, touching the skin there gently. ‘You wouldn’t mind spending another day with me whilst you’re free?’ he jokes teasingly, acting if he is insecure about the thought of that. ‘As long as you make my back survive that, I sure wouldn’t mind, I teasingly wink at him, but it’s also kinda true-my back is starting to kinda tell me that me and Noah have been… a little wild.

‘Oh…’ he teases me as a mischievous grin grows on his face. ‘Did I really do that much of a number on you, that you are now not sure if your back will survive?’ he smirks as his voice is low and still teasing, his hands softly moving up and down my back, touching the skin there just softly enough to tease me with it. ‘Or is that your way of telling me that you want me to massage you?’

‘Maybe both, maybe one of those answers… Who knows,’ I smirk as I shrug my shoulders. He smirks again at my tone and attitude, as his hands continue to move softly over my back, his fingertips sliding over my bare skin gently.

‘How about this…’ he starts, his voice lowering as he now moves his lips to my neck. ‘I’ll massage your back, and maybe take care of some other parts of your body as well…’ he then smiles against my neck.

I grin back, giggling a little as a warm and excited pang shoots through my stomach by hearing his proposal. ‘Deal,’ I say, kissing his cheek after. He then lets his lips press against my lips for another soft, passionate kiss.

‘Well, then…’ he chuckles a little, and with that he just picks me up from the ground in a smooth movement, making me squeal a little and laugh, and I wrap my arms around his neck. ‘Let’s head home right now…’

‘Your place or mine?’ I smirk, knowing that both our houses aren’t very far from the venue we are right now, as we all planned that with the band and crew together since this is the last show for a week.

‘I think mine is still a little closer than yours,’ he mischievously smirks. ‘And, I have proper massaging oil at home anyways, so…’

I giggle again as I nod. ‘Alright, alright. deal. ‘Do we need a cab?’

As he continues holding me in his arms while I talk to him, he chuckles as he shakes his head at my words. ‘Oh, no no no… We are walking this-it’s not that far,’ he playfully and confidently grins at me, glancing down at me again as he sees the playful twinkle appear in my eyes as well, making him smirk at me again.

I teasingly roll my eyes at him. ‘Fine. I would love to see you carrying me the entire way towards your home anyway, because you of course will still be doing that right?’ I grin at him.

‘Of course,’ he smirks as we leave the small room and walk towards the exit, laughing a little in between as everyone at the party looks at us with both confusion and a little laughter as well. ‘I mean… I am already carrying you-I guess I should continue doing that, right?’ he winks at me.

He continues walking through the crowd with me tightly and safely in his arms, and when I look at Noah’s face now and then, my heart grows warm when I see him looking proud and happy, and like he is having a good time. I truly love seeing him like this-the twinkle in his eyes, the big grin on his face, and his excited and happy body language. Nick and Jolly slap him on the back when they see him, big grins and laughter on their faces as Noah informs them that we are headed towards their home. Nicholas looks at me with a sweet, yet proud and deserving smile, raising his glass at me. I nod back at him with a thankful smile, as I am still thankful for the advice he gave to me for me and Noah’s situation, and how he is overall always there for me if I need someone to talk to.

I can’t help but giggle the whole time as we now are outside, Noah walking casually in the direction of his apartment with me still in his arms. Not gonna lie, it’s attractive that he is able to do this all. I nuzzle my head into his neck as a shiver runs over my back, the cold air from outside hitting the exposed bits of my skin. It makes him let out a small, playful groan, holding me a bit closer to him.

‘Well, it is goddamn freezing, that’s for sure,’ I say.

‘I guess that means we will have to warm up the moment we get home together, right?’ he smirks with a teasing tone in his voice, kissing me against my hair, a smirk still on his lips as he does.

‘Hmm, I guess so,’ I laugh back.

We then walk further in a comfortable silence, making comments about our surroundings now and then and laughing at some drunk people stumbling past us this late at night, or just some other funny things we see-to be fair, alcohol in your system makes everything quite funny. Soon, the two of us arrive at the band's apartment, and he turns to look down at me with a mischievous smirk on his face once again.

‘Well, here we are.’

He slowly lowers me down, his arms wrapped around my waist, his hands already slipping under the fabric of my dress the second my feet fit the ground.

‘Slow down boy,’ I smirk at him as I shake my head, and then look at his door. ‘Might unlock the door first? Or did you plan to stand here in the cold with me the rest of the night?’ I tease him as I giggle after. Noah lets out a small chuckle at my words. ‘You’re right,’ he says with a small smile, and he pulls his keys out, unlocking the door and opening it for me to let me walk in first. He follows me immediately afterwards, and as he does, he softly wraps his arms around my waist from behind the dark hallway, only being lit a little by the warm yellow light of the street lanterns outside. The hallway has a familiar scent to me-it’s a mix of cigarettes, a little bit of fabric of clothes and furniture, and scents from basically all the band members and their perfumes and deodorant. He softly kisses my neck as he stands behind me, his hand sliding to the front of my stomach, his fingers starting to gently circle there a bit. I smile as he does so, and before he gives me one last kiss on my neck, he asks as I hear the grin in his voice: ‘Wanna move upstairs?’

taglist: @blackgirlmagicforever @ima1986 @uiscefhuaraithe99

want to be added? let me know!

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mortallynervousfart · 1 month

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EndoPeak Supplements - Health

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daydadahlias · 11 months

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Hell yeah! Look at you with the highest grade!!!! (Make sure you’re taking care of yourself in the mean time too jess)

and if i refuse?

#TAKE CARE OF MYSELF???? r u out of ur mind #fank u tho <3 #IM jess can u believe it!#my pets have been trying to hype man me through this by cuddling with me while i watch the most devastating documentaries ever <3 #whatre u gonna do if i say no huh #u gonna beat me up or smthn?#pigeon #anon #i dare u to do it #i want u to do it #that's my favorite thing to say when i walk across the street and see a car coming at me <3 #I ALMOST?? GOT HIT BY A CAR??? THE OTHER DAY??? and it was like bestie pls #i was on the phone venting passionately and this car sped towards me and slammed on its horn like mf just slow tf down i am on a CROSSWALK?#anyway i flipped them off and lived to tell the tale #so #that has no baring on anything i just felt like sharing im very sleepy <3

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gay-dorito-dust · 2 months

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I have been binging your work!

I don't know if this breaks your trauma rule or not, but (with the guys of your choosing as long as Ratio is there) how would the guys react to losing reader (they haven't confessed feelings yet) during a mission and thinking they died. Then, the reader reappears a week later bandaged up, but alive. Maybe spouts their confession first? ˘͈ᵕ˘͈

I adore your writing. Thank you!

This is way too fucking long, so be warned. It’s like I rammed 4 mini stories in one but got lost at some point cuz I left this ask to collect dust. Also thanks for enjoying my writing it’s much appreciated. :) 🦦🐿️

Sunday:

The moment he got news that you’ve been assumed dead in the aftermath of a dangerous mission, he looses composure really quickly.

Loosing Robin was one thing but loosing you on top of that was the straw that broke the camels back.

He originally doesn’t believe that you were gone, he refuses to as he practically tears his office to shreds in a fit of anger and grief before forcing himself to regain composure and clean up after his outburst. He needed to in order to keep up the illusion that he was the levelheaded leader The Family needed in these moments of chaos and mistrust.

Even if he himself was breaking down internally alongside everyone else, hellbent on finding the culprit for your death and punishing them so severely that they’d beg for death. He’d avenge you in anyway he could, even if it meant sending out the bloodhound family on a wild goose chase that only ends in dead ends, he would get you justice no matter how it may come.

His heart had died alongside you that day.

So when a week passes and he finally has you back in his arms, all the while being carful with your wounds as his eyes searched you over in a way you weren’t use to.

‘You’re alive.’ He breathes out in relief as he then begins to laugh and rest his head against yours, breathing you in deeply as he relishes in this long awaited moment. ‘Of course you’re alive.’ He mutters.

‘Sunday,’ you began but Sunday was quite to cut you off.

‘Do you know how I felt thinking you were dead? Driving myself insane to prove that you were still alive anyway I could as not to bear the idea of walking through this life without the one person I love so dearly.’ Sunday takes a brief pauses in his monologue, feeling out of breath after having put everything out into the open before continuing. ‘I thought my heart had stopped beating that day and now I have you bad in my arms.’ Sunday then chuckles darkly as he gripped you tighter. ‘I’ll ensure that I’d never have to revisit that part of my life ever again.’

‘Sunday-‘

‘Shhh.’ Sunday cuts you off once more, pressing a kiss to your forehead as he holds you close to his chest, rubbing your back soothingly. ‘Just know that what I do after this, I do out of my love for you.’ He says against your forehead before pressing another kiss there for good measure.

Jing yuan:

Loss wasn’t new to Jing Yuan.

He has experienced it in multiple forms throughout his life, but that didn’t made the news of your death any less painful for the General.

While his mind might’ve made peace with the fact that you were gone, his heart however did not as he would find himself in the places that you often vacated to in moments of stress, or to just be left alone for a while with your thoughts. So to no longer see you in any of those hidden spots -waiting for him to find you like you usually did- only worsened the grief he felt in his heart as he sat himself down and allowed the memories to pass over him in waves.

You were both so happy together and felt a sense of fulfilment that could only be achieved when you were within the other’s presence; A feeling that was uniquely yours and yours alone that could never be replicated, ever. For no one could ever come close to replacing you, nor the companionship you and he had for each other that many assumed would blossom into something more; Jing Yuan also shared the same sentiments as they did, but just as he built the courage to push that boundary between the two of you, you were taken from him before he could utter a single word.

So when a week passes and Jing Yuan found your battered and beaten form in one of your secret spots, back resting against a tree with your eyes closed.

‘Y/n?’ He called out and your eyes opened upon hearing his voice and looking at him with a weak smile. ‘Hey General, miss me?’ You said as you struggled to get up to your feet, only to stumble forward and into Jing Yuan’s chest as his strong yet gentle hands hold you in place.

‘More than you could ever hope to know.’ Jing yuan said as he focused on how you felt beneath his hands, warm and alive.

‘I’m sorry I kept you waiting.’ You muttered against his chest as his warmth made you realised just how tired you were from everything you’ve experienced this last week alone. ‘I never meant to keep you waiting in fear that you’d forget about me if I don’t stay in your life long enough.’ You admit and Jing Yuan instinctively presses a soft kiss to the top of your head, holding you protectively.

‘I could never forget about you my beloved.’ Jing Yuan reassured you as he looked you deep into your eyes. ‘You’ve managed to carve your place within my heart and soul, so much that there isn’t a day where you aren’t all I think about, regardless of whether or not your by my side or far away.’ He finished by pressing a gentle kiss to the gauze on your cheek, chuckling upon seeing your cute attempts of burrowing your face into his chest.

‘How long have you’ve been waiting to say this.’ You asked, thankful that he was the one to admit his feelings first, as you would’ve had a hard time articulating your words as fluidly as he could.

‘For a very long time.’ Jing Yuan replied with a small smile as he then proceeded to lift you into his arms, cuasing you to squeal in surprise, as he made sure to be carful of your wounds and began walking to the nearest medics to make sure your wounds weren’t going to be trouble later on.

Aventurine:

He didn’t know what to think when you were pronounced dead, all Aventurine could feel in that moment was an overwhelming numbness that encased him entirely.

The only light left in his life had been snuffed out, plummeting him into utter and total darkness he had once been well acquainted with until you came along, giving him a reason to keep looking forward despite everything.

You were no longer here to hold onto his left hand before he could even think of hiding it behind his back out of habit, you were no longer here to be his reason, his comfort, his safe place. You were taken away from him unfairly and once again Aventurine found himself asking the same question he has been asking himself for a long time; why everyone was born into this life just to die.

So when a week passes and Aventurine finds himself sat on a bench somewhere, still not dealing well then than he was the week of your assumed passing, lost in his own thoughts when someone took a seat next to him. Aventurine was just about ready to tell them to go away, when he saw just who was sitting next to him; you.

‘I know, I look like shit but you don’t have to look at me like that.’ You spoke upon feeling his eyes gaze upon the gauze on your cheek, then towards the array of bandages that littered the rest of your body.

‘I thought you died.’ He hissed, emotion was heavy in his voice as his eyes became bleary with unshed tears as he felt his breathing become heavy with the reality that you were alive. He didn’t know what was real and what wasn’t in that moment as his mind raced. And it wasn’t until you reached out to grasp his left hand and intertwine your fingers together, squeezing, did everything finally became clear to him.

‘I thought I was too at one point but there was something that kept me from journeying over to the afterlife.’ You admit, looking over at him and smiling sweetly, wanting nothing then to calm his thoughts and reassure him that this wasn’t a dream.

‘And what was that?’ He laughs humourlessly as he stares back at you, wanting to hear what excuses you could come up with for faking being dead for a week. ‘Willpower? Determination?’

‘You Kakavasha.’ You replied straightforwardly and his breath hitched in his throat. You rarely used his actual name unless it was absolutely serious. ‘You were all I thought about as I pushed through my injuries.’ You told him as you continued. ‘Kakavasha is waiting for me was just about all I could think about for a week straight.’ You finished as though you didn’t just confess that he was your soul motivator in staying alive.

‘Really?’ Aventurine said softly, finding it impossible that he could possibly be your reason for anything. ‘Why?’

‘Yes really.’ You chuckled, pressing a kiss to his cheek as you rested your head against his shoulder. ‘As for why, it’s because I like you more then did let myself admit, but i just wanted you to know incase anything truly bad were to ever happen to me-‘

‘No.’ Aventurine cut you off suddenly, squeezing your hand as though he were afraid. ‘Nothing is going to happen to you, not now. not ever. I just got you back.’ He adds resting his head against your own in a desperate attempt of feeling more of your against him. ‘Just stay with me…please.’ He begs you in a whisper as he nuzzled further into you. ‘and don’t go anywhere I can’t follow. I don’t think I can bear the thought of loosing you again.’

You smiled softly as you just whispered back against the skin of his neck. ‘As long as you don’t go anywhere I can’t follow. I like my crush to be alive and close by even if he can be a pain in my ass sometimes.’

Aventurine chuckles, his heart becoming whole again as he made you cuddle into his side, kissing your head once more as you took this moment to familiarise yourselves with each other. ‘At least I’m a pleasurable pain in the ass.’ He teased and you pinch his side, causing him to flinch, but his smile remained and this time his smile was genuine.

His light has came home.

Ratio:

Fully believed that he’d see you when the mission ended, knowing just how talented and dedicated to the craft you were, and having faith that this would be a measly walk in a park for you.

Only to receive word that you were one of the many who were assumed dead when you weren’t found amongst the living nor the dead.

Veritas tries to remain as levelheaded and logical as possible during this time and continue life as normal. However found himself retracting from everyone else and going none contact, more so specifically with the people you were once associated with, and instead focused heavily on his studies and academics to an unhealthy extent.

A week passes and Veritas feels as though he’s seen a ghost the moment he saw you in his peripheral vision, bandaged and dressed in ripped clothing but still somehow finding it in you to smile.

‘You idiotic Buffon!’ He exclaims as he walks towards you.

‘Well that’s a nice way to greet someone you care about.’ You replied as you readied yourself for a massive rant about how stupid you were and so on, but instead you were held against his chest as he burrows his head into your neck.

‘I thought you died.’ He says in a whisper as he breathed you in. This went against all logic but in that rare moment Veritas didn’t care, you were alive but he still couldn’t let go of the fact that you didn’t tell anyone you were still alive. ‘Why didn’t you tell anyone that you were alive, send a signal, anything.’

You shrugged as you made yourself comfortable in his strong arms. ‘All communications were badly damaged or completely cut off.’ You told him. ‘I was on my own for a long while before finding my way back to you.’

‘Me?’ Veritas asked, pulling away from you. ‘Why not a medial facility for a proper treatment of your wounds? Have you hit your head so hard that common sense had been left on the back burner when making that decision?’

‘I wanted to see you first you dickhead!’ You exclaimed, shutting Veritas up rather quickly with your confession but you didn’t care. ‘is it so wrong of me to let the man I love know that I’m okay? So go ahead and call me an idiot all you like but that won’t change the fact that I felt more fear about not telling you how I truly feel then dying on some stupid mission.’ You finished your rant.

‘You’re insufferable.’ Veritas said after a moment of silence and you couldn’t help but feel a little annoyed at this that you didn’t notice that Veritas has began to close in the distance between the two of you.

You scoffed. ‘Oh sure call me insufferable as if you-‘ Veritas cuts you off by cupping your cheeks and planting a sweet short lived kiss against your lips before pulling away with a smirk.

‘Glad to know that the feelings are reciprocated.’ He says, taking enjoyment of rendering you speechless as he gently guided you to medical, and remaining by your side for the remainder of the day.

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yandere-sins · 10 months

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Imagine getting isekai’ed into otome game as a background character, watching the main character going down routes as you live your peaceful, mundane life, but you’ve unknowingly been going down a route as well, a route for a hidden character that you didn’t discover during your time playing the game.

That character being the reason the game has a dark content warning.

Gosh anon, that idea is so good!!!! I didn't know it would tickle all the right places in my brain, but when I started I couldn't stop lol. Love it, thank you for sending it in ♥

If this had one of these super long titles that are tmi it would be:

I got Isekai'ed into an Otome Game as a Background Character and now I Have to Finish It with the Secret Yandere Love Interest!!

»»———————— ♡ ————————««

A serene smile spread over your lips as you watched the two lovebirds in the corner of your coffee shop.

Swirling the milk into a cup, it created a little white heart surrounded by foamy coffee, its aroma drifting into your nose. Had someone told you that the little things like a cup of coffee made with love and care were enough to give you the peace of mind you always wanted in your previous life, you would have laughed at them. For you, it had always been the hustle, the making money, finding a partner, and creating a family. Make everyone proud while being successful, whether it costs you nights of sleep or days without proper meals. But looking at yourself now, it all seemed so far away now, and you let out a content sigh before setting down the cup in front of the customer at the bar.

"You seem happy today," your regular at the counter noted, picking up the cup and taking a moment to appreciate the aroma just like you had. A smile sneaked onto their lips, too, after they took a sip, and you couldn't help but feel your heart swell with pride and happiness when they gave you a satisfied nod.

"I am! I'm really getting accustomed to my new life here, it's... been a while since I've been so content."

The truth behind everything that happened to you was something you couldn't speak about lightly. Not when it turned the life you knew upside down, leaving you to start over completely. One day you were an employee of a well-known company, responsible for sales and reports and everything stressful. And the next, you were in your favorite, cozy video game, running the coffee shop the main character liked to visit with all the romance options in the game.

Isekai was the genre that came to mind when you thought about your situation. Luckily you were spared the memories of your death in the real world, the circumstances blurry as you barely remembered going home late from work, only to wake up in this very different universe. Perhaps you were just comatose, and this was a dream. Still, by now, you had managed to slip into your role as the barista of the small coffee shop, a barely mentioned background character, just fine.

Your eyes jumped back to the couple in the corner, giggling and teasing each other over a group project, and you felt an immense relief you weren't reincarnated as the main protagonist and had to go through the years of studying and trying to establish connections with the love interests again. You already did that in your old life, and it wasn't as romantic and fun as the game made it out to be. You only played it because it got your mind off things, the art was pretty, and it had the exact amount of cozy time management you needed to relax. But living as the main character in it? No, thank you!

"Jealous?" your regular teased, and you chuckled, shaking your head. They tapped their—now empty—cup, and you took it from them, replacing it with some water until you had the next cup of coffee ready for them.

"I just think it's cute. I never had someone so interested in me they'd take me out for coffee and share their cake with me when I was younger."

Your words tasted a little bitter on your tongue. Still, you genuinely couldn't wish for anything but the main character's happiness. It was just the feeling of being loved, desired, and wanted that you missed, even though your new life was more than satisfactory despite you feeling a little lonely sometimes.

"Well, it's never too late to start," they chuckled, taking up their fork and cutting off the tip of their strawberry shortcake, including the big chunk of strawberry on top, picking it up and holding it out towards you.

"Oh, I wouldn't dare--"

"I insist! As thanks for the amazing coffee every time I come here."

Nudging your lips with their fork, you let out an awkward chuckle. It was okay, right? They wouldn't sue you for eating the cake they paid for, would they? This was just a silly little game. What could go wrong with you accepting their kindness?

Opening your lips, you let them feed you the cake, taking a moment to let the sweet and fruity notes mix with the fluffy whip cream before you were sent straight to heaven. Not to toot your own horn, but your baking skills had improved so much since you started working at the shop. Who knew you had that in you?

Occupied with the moment of bliss as you let the cake flavor mix in your mouth, you hummed happily before devoting yourself back to making the coffee with a smile on your face. Unaware of your regular fixating on the fork you had just eaten from, staring at it like it was some strange artifact. Your phone dinged softly in its drawer, and you checked it briefly to see the notification pinging up, saying, "Achievement unlocked: Cake-Master - Provide the most delicious cake to your customers."

"Excuse me!" the main character called out to you, stepping up to the counter, and you directed your attention to her, ignoring the little game notification you've been receiving since starting your new life here, the love interest not far away before the two began fighting over who was going to pay the bill this time lovingly. Of course, the love interest won, but you wouldn't have expected it any other way. Seeing the blush on the main character's face after her romance option told her he'd "always take care" of her made you grin like a little fan, and you cheered them on in your head.

By the time you returned to your regular, their knuckles had gone white with how hard they were gripping the fork in their hand, their eyes following the couple who was about to leave. For a moment, it made you wonder if they had a crush on either of them, their sweet interaction surely uncomfortable if that was the case. But you didn't remember there being a jealousy scene in the game. You'd know, almost playing it 100% before your death. There apparently was a secret route you never got but were trying your hardest to achieve. Now you were left to wonder what it entailed.

But the second you returned, they looked up at you, expression softening and the tension disappearing, and you chalked it up to having witnessed a cringe moment that they had gotten so awkward. "Thank you for the cake, that was really nice of you! Do you want another fork?" you asked and were met with a headshake and a smile.

They quickly began eating their cake and complimenting your baking skills, stroking your growing ego when they rubbed their belly.

"I never had a cake that good!" they proclaimed, and you laughed out loud, overjoyed that you had made them so happy.

"Say..." they suddenly spoke up again, leaning on the counter and watching you with gentle eyes. Your heart set out for a second, tension rising as you didn't know what they were going to ask. Ever since you opened the coffee shop, the main character, love interests, and this regular had come by constantly. If you were honest, you enjoyed their visits more and more. Their presence felt like it belonged here with you, and you were a part of something bigger after all, washing away the small, lonely part of you.

And maybe... just maybe... this was how your happy end would play out.

"Are you this nice to every customer?"

Halting your movements, you set aside the brew head that you used on the espresso machine, despite having to clean it, thinking about your answer for a moment. It was a strange question to ask someone who worked in customer service. Still, you appreciated your regular, so you didn't want to give them a snarky answer.

"Uhm, well, I am just trying to make everyone feel welcome! But of course, it's a bit different with my regulars! After all, they come here often, like a second family. So I guess I'm a bit nicer because you really get to know and appreciate these people that stay to chat and tell stories."

"I see," they muttered. "Family, huh..."

After that, you suddenly were swamped with sudden orders, excusing yourself to fulfill them, chatting and laughing with even the people that were just passing by. Maybe you really were just nice? Perhaps this new environment had made you more relaxed and gentle than the harsh world you lived in, and it was showing? But their question was shoved into the back of your mind as you kept fulfilling orders and earning your keep.

Once the rush was over, you returned to your regular, only to find their seat empty. Strange, you thought. You could have sworn that you felt their eyes on you the whole time you were away, but luckily, they didn't walk out on their tab, leaving the money and a folded-up napkin beneath their empty cup for you to find. You quickly stored away the bills, trusting your regular with knowing what they had to pay after so many weeks of the same order.

You were about to throw away their napkin when you noticed some red marks on them, unwrapping the paper to find a note scribbled in what you had to assume was ink.

"You're so beautiful when you laugh."

The surprise wore off quite fast, and you smiled, thinking nothing of it but that it was a nice compliment from your regular. Still, you ended up throwing the napkin away—not knowing if it was dirty, after all—taking the coffee cup and plate to the sink to clean them, overseeing the red tip on the fork that was too dark to be from the strawberry.

The rest of your day was uneventful, and by the time you were closing, you were tired and ready to tug in for the night, wrapping up your business at the shop quickly before walking home. You didn't have a chance to look at your phone since you glanced at the achievement notification, so you took it out, startled when you saw a dozen new messages.

Achievement unlocked: Happy new life - Be content with your new life

Achievement unlocked: A fork for two! - Share a fork with someone special

Achievement unlocked: Jealousy - Make someone special jealous

Achievement unlocked: Soothing - Calm someone special down with your presence

Achievement unlocked: Family - Have someone be moved by your words

Achievement unlocked: The nicest person in town - Be beloved by all, but especially by someone special

Achievement unlocked: Blood in the cup - Have someone hurt themselves at your coffee shop

Achievement unlocked: Wonder-Barista - Complete twenty orders in less than thirty minutes

Achievement unlocked: Strange compliment - Receive a compliment through unusual means

Achievement unlocked: Blooming infatuation - Have someone special fall in love with you

Achievement unlocked: Shop-Pro! - Close the shop twenty times after making a profit from your work

Achievement unlocked: Tired - Hard workers deserve to relax

You blinked a few times, surprised by what you were reading and a little weirded out by some of these achievements. They gave you some extra coins in your shop till and reputation with the townspeople, so you usually didn't mind them. But to say some of their descriptions were weird was an understatement. You couldn't even remember someone getting hurt at your workplace that day.

By the time you reached your apartment, you decided to ignore the strange notifications and just let the day come to an end with a hot bath and your favorite show. But you were startled when your phone suddenly began ringing loudly, even though you had turned off the sound back at the coffee shop after the first notification. The first messages that appeared before you were more achievements, and you stopped turning the key in your door as you read them.

Achievement unlocked: Follower - Have someone special follow you home

Achievement unlocked: Welcome home! - Arrive at home, not alone

Achievement unlocked: Wherever you go, I'll be watching you - Ɨ ΔΜ ΔŁŴΔ¥Ş ŴΔŦĆĦƗŇǤ ¥ØỮ

Lifting your head, you looked around you, glancing over your shoulder and into the courtyard below. No one was out; everyone was at home eating dinner and occupied with their lives. Confused, you swiped all the notifications away before another pop-up appeared.

ALERT! You're about to enter X's route. Do you want to continue?

> Yes > No

Panicked at this point, you pressed "No," but nothing happened. You kept tapping it repeatedly, not understanding what was happening with your phone. But nothing changed, the notification staying in place. The sound of something breaking inside your apartment tore your focus away from your phone, startling you.

You must have finally managed to close it, the pop-up disappearing just as you unlocked the door to your apartment, still having held on to the key when you were surprised by the sound. Darkness and silence greeted you from inside, everything seemingly normal.

Majorly confused, you shook your head, slowly entering the hallway leading inside. "Hello?" you called out, reaching for the light switch. The light flickered on, and... there was no one. Holding your breath, no sound reached your ears, and you groaned, realizing you got freaked out about... nothing.

This wasn't some kind of horror game, and the story never had a murder-solving subplot. True, the ratings for it were kind of strange—it being rated as 18+ on the website—but seriously, what should happen in a cozy little city like the one the game played in? You didn't even think they had a police station here.

Pushing off your shoes as you shrugged off the weird feeling from before, you walked up the hallway to your living room, turning on the light before coming to an abrupt halt. There were broken pieces of glass underneath your living room window, but what really freaked you out came into view only when you lifted your head. You could look into the mirror of your cabinet door from your position, red marker dripping from it as if someone had hastily scribbled on it just seconds ago. You weren't sure it was a pen anymore, judging by its deep red color and the fluidity of it.

"𝘪 𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘥 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘭𝘢𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘥𝘳𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘮𝘦 𝘤𝘳𝘢𝘻𝘺"

Your phone pinged.

Achievement unlocked:

On the Highway to Hell - Unlock the secret route

#isekai #yandere isekai #yandere!isekai #yandere #yandere imagines #yandere headcanons #yandere scenarios #yandere fanfiction #yandere writing #yandere stories #yandere oneshots #yandere oneshot #yandere drabble #yandere x reader #yandere x darling #Yandere TW

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uluvjay · 1 month

Text

Thighs-M. Verstappen

Max Verstappen x fem! reader

In which Max always catches you staring at his thighs and finally does something about it

Warnings?; smut, thigh riding, cursing, kissing, pet names, slight degradation, slight overstimulation, i apologize for any errors I missed!

It was no secret that max had nice thighs, and it was no secret to your boyfriend how attracted you were to his thighs.

The Dutchman had caught you staring at them on multiple occasions yet any time he’d lock eyes with you, your head was snapping in the opposite direction with a growing blush on your cheeks.

However lately he’s caught your eyes locked on them a bit more than usual and since you weren’t going to do anything about, he would.

He had planned a nice dinner for the two of you, not giving you many details besides to keep it casual and to be ready by seven.

“Almost ready Schat?” He questioned as he passed by your vanity on the way to your walk in closet.

“Mhm, just have to get dressed.” You smiled up at him, head tipping back to rest on his stomach as he was stood behind your seated form.

“Me too.” He smiled back, leaning down to place a kiss to your hair before heading to the closet.

He had already seen your outfit laid out on the bed, a smirk forming on his face as he pulled out his own clothes but more importantly the jeans that were a bit tight around his thighs and always had your eyes locked on the thick muscles.

He hadn’t realized how long he had taken until you were calling out for him and asking if he was ready.

“Yeah I’m ready.” He called back, sliding on his shoes and pulling one of his jackets from a hanger.

He smiled as he exited the closet to find you stood in front of your floor to ceiling mirror touching up your lipgloss, dressed in jeans similar to his, a nice black sweater, heels, and the purse he’d gotten you for your birthday.

“You look gorgeous baby.” He praised.

“Thank you.” You blushed turning to face him.

Max smirked at your sharp intake of air as your eyes raked over his body, stopping at the denim that hugged his thighs.

“Everything okay Schat?”

“Huh?-oh um yeah.” You blushed, “You look very handsome.” You said smiling as you made way to him and placed a soft kiss to his lips.

You may have did your best to cover up the lust in your eyes but max had already caught the little sparkle.

“We better get going before we’re late.” You spoke up before turning around and heading downstairs.

The ride to the restaurant was tense to say the least, you could feel the desire growing in your stomach and the dull throb beginning between your legs.

Taking glances at Maxes thighs every chance you got, eyes lingering on them a bit too much and getting caught multiple times in the process.

Getting out of the tight sports car felt like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders and thankfully you and max had been sat across from one another allowing the dinner to be relaxing however, the throbbing in between your thighs never seemed to disappear.

The ride home was a bit better than before, you being able to calm yourself down and force the sinful thoughts of riding your boyfriends thighs until you physically couldn’t go anymore to the back of your mind.

Max walked into your shared apartment first, greeting your screaming cats first before they moved onto you, rubbing their soft bodies against your legs.

“Hi my babies.” You greeted the bengals.

You moved to set your purse down on the entryway table, kicking off your tight heels with a sigh of relief

“Baby?” Max called, “can you come here for a second?”

You followed his voice into the living room, stopping in the doorway as you found his legs spread wide, jacket thrown on the opposite side of the couch while he looked at you with an evil smirk.

“Y-yeah?” You questioned.

“Come here” he spoke softly but you could hear his lustful rasp hidden below.

You made your way to stand in between his still spread legs, a gasp escaping you as his large hands reached for the button and zipper of your jeans.

“What are you doing?”

“Taking care of something.” He mumbled, eyes not bothering to look up as he pulled the denim down your legs revealing you dark blue thong.

He reached a hand out instinctively as you stepped out of your jeans before pulling you down on top of him by the hand you had placed in his for balance.

He positioned your body to rest over one of his thighs, a cocky smirk forming at the way you whimpered when your lace covered cunt came into contact with it.

“Max what’s going on?” You questioned your boyfriend once again.

“You’re going to ride my thigh until you cum, I’ve seen the way you look at them baby, I know you want to do it.”

You couldn’t help the moan that bubbled out at his words, he knew you better than you knew yourself at this point, always knowing exactly what you wanted or needed without you even having to vocalize it.

“Bu-“

“No buts Schat, now be a good girl and get yourself off on my thigh.” He instructed as he leaned back into the couch, strong arms spreading along the back of the couch.

You did as you were told, allowing your aching and dripping cunt to begin moving back and forth starting with a small momentum.

However that didn’t last for long as the new sense of pleasure took over your body and soon your hips were moving shamelessly as you humped your boyfriend’s thigh.

Max was truly struggling to control himself, watching as whimpered on top of him, the wet spot that had formed below you no doubt ruining his jeans but he could care less.

Not when your head was thrown back in pure ecstasy, and your freshly manicured nails began to claw at his expensive shirt.

“Doing so good Baby..this is what you’ve been wanting right? To hump my thigh like a little bitch in heat?” He taunted.

You hated how your pussy clenched at his dirty words, but after all it was the truth.

“Yes, fuck yes max..feels so good.” You whined, opening your eyes to stare down into his blue ones.

That’s when he snapped, one of his hands coming to tangle in your hair before tugging you down and slamming his lips against yours in a hot kiss.

His tongue pushed its way into your mouth, leaving you no room to protest as his mouth dominated yours leaving you breathless on top of him.

You were both panting by the time he pulled away, his lips trailing down your throat as he left wet kisses around your skin followed by small nips.

“max I’m getting close.” You breathed, hips beginning to stutter as you could feel the fire in your lower stomach intensifying.

“Yeah? Gonna come for me pretty girl?”

“Fuck!..yes max, so close.” You cried loudly hips noticeably slowing as you did your best to keep up with your previous pace and the overpowering pleasure taking over your body.

Max dropped his hands to your hips, holding on tight at he guided your body over the thick muscle, repeatedly clenching and unclenching it to add more pressure to your sensitive cunt.

You cried out as your high overtook your body, mind going fuzzy as you slumped against max, thighs and body shaking as he continued working you through your high.

You whimpered into his neck as he slowly brought his movements to an end, finally stopping when your hand shot out to grip his wrist and a pathetic whimper fell from your mouth.

“I know baby, I know..did so good for me.” He praised as he placed kissed to the side of your head, holing your panting body close to his strong one.

You two sat like that for awhile until you finally pulled yourself away from his chest and pulled him into a slow and loving kiss, thanking him for giving you what you needed.

“That was so good.” You mumbled against his lips before pulled away.

“Yeah?”

“Mhm.” You nodded bashfully, a deep blush growing on your lips.

“Could have done it a long time ago if you would’ve just asked instead of hiding it.” He spoke softly reaching a hand up to stroke your cheek, his heart warming as you leaned into his palm.

“I know..but something tells me we’ll be doing it quite often now.” You smirked.

“Oh will we?” He smirked right back, his lustful gaze quickly returning.

“We most certainly will be.” You giggled, dipping down to pull him into a hot kiss.

#max verstappen x you #max verstappen imagine #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen smut #max verstappen #max verstappen x y/n #formula one smut #formula one fluff #f1 fluff #f1 smut #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fic

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dancingbirdie · 7 months

Text

Back with another bout of plotless smut. Read at your own discretion and take note of the tags. <333

Like my smut writing? Find more here.

We Have All Night

Rating: MATURE

Pairing: Astarion x fem!Reader x Halsin

Word Count: 800

Warnings/Tags: Oral sex (fem!Reader receiving), praise kink, hand kink, threesome technically?, mentions of alcohol, pure plotless smut

Summary: You'd been wondering for some time what it would be like to have Halsin and Astarion share you.

*****

You could have easily blamed the events that ensued on the bottles of Blingdenstone Blush you all had passed around camp that evening. But if you were honest with yourself, the position you found yourself in was one you had been fantasizing about for some time.

“That’s it, darling,” Astarion coaxed as his fingers slipped gently through your hair, teasing and massaging your scalp. Your head was pillowed in his lap, pupils blown wide with lust as you peered up at him. He smiled down at you, a wicked, hedonistic sort of grin.

“You so desperately want to hold still for him, don’t you?”

You whined your assent, trying your best to keep your hips from bucking – an impossible task considering the relentless way Halsin’s tongue was licking and circling that sensitive spot at the apex of your thighs.

“Such a good girl. You’re doing so well” Astarion cooed, while Halsin groaned in agreement. The vibrations it created against your skin felt like electricity surging through your limbs.

Your mind was a disjointed haze of lust and alcohol. Totally uninhibited, you keened loudly as the druid suddenly gripped the softness of your thighs and plunged his tongue inside you.

“Shh, shh, shh” Astarion hushed, moving a hand to cover your mouth. “We don’t want the rest of the camp to hear our fun, do we?”

You groaned and shook your head slightly.

“Are you sure you don’t want to join in?” you rasped, your lips moving against his slender fingers.

He gave a mischievous little chuckle. “I’m certain. I’m having a wonderful time just watching,” Astarion returned.

“The night is still young,” Halsin persuaded, pausing his feasting on you to meet Astarion’s eyes. The absence of his mouth left you wanting, aching for contact once more. “If you change your mind, there’s plenty of fun to be had.”

“A tempting offer, indeed,” Astarion smirked. “Let’s see where the evening takes us, shall we?”

You moaned against his hand as Halsin dipped his head to begin circling your clit with his tongue once more. You fisted his gorgeous auburn locks in your hands, eliciting a groan from his mouth that felt absolutely delicious against your hypersensitive skin.

“Our sweet pup has an oh-so-difficult time keeping quiet, doesn’t she?” Astarion crooned, tracing his fingers against the seam of your lips. “You’re trying so hard, darling, I know you are.”

His silken, sinful voice felt almost as euphoric as the deplorable things Halsin was doing between your legs. In a bout of unbridled lust, you opened your mouth to capture Astarion’s index and middle fingers in your mouth.

You sucked down on them, circled them with your tongue, as you imagined having his hard length sheathed down your throat. Your bawdy move drew a sharp breath from the vampire, followed by a quiet groan.

You paused your ministrations, lifting a hand to pull his fingers from your mouth before asking, “Is this okay? Is it too much?”

Astarion chuckled darkly, and you watched as his chest rose and fell with uneven breaths.

“You wicked thing,” he purred. “Yes, it’s okay. And it has the added benefit of keeping you quiet.”

You were beyond laughs and jokes. Hearing his consent, you drew his fingers back down to your mouth and resumed your sucking. You moaned your approval as Astarion pistoned his fingers deeper into your mouth at the same time Halsin inserted two fingers inside you.

You knew you wouldn’t last long. Not with the way the druid was fucking you with his fingers at the same time his tongue was circling your clit. Not with the way Astarion was trailing one hand delicately across your exposed skin while you worshiped the fingers of his other hand with your tongue and lips.

Every nerve within you was alight and thrumming with barely-restrained energy. You could feel yourself climbing higher and higher, your body preparing for the sweetest freefall that would soon ensue. Your heels dug into Halsin’s muscled back as you tensed, one hand still clenching his hair while the other held desperately onto Astarion’s thigh.

“Yes, darling, yes,” Astarion kept coaxing as your body drew more and more taut. A bowstring desperate to be released.

“Let yourself come, you know you want to,” he added in a soft whisper.

It was too much.

Those words, and a final flick of Halsin’s tongue, had you shattering into a thousand pieces. Your cries were barely restrained by the fingers still occupying your mouth. You were lost in pleasure, awash in the tingling aftermath of your release.

Chest heaving, mind reeling, you could barely find words.

“That… that was…” you wheezed, before letting loose a giggle. “Everything I’d imagined it would be.”

“You’d thought about this before?” Halsin grinned, wiping his mouth clean against his forearm before leaning down to plant a reverent kiss against your lips. You could taste yourself on him. It gave you more satisfaction than perhaps it should have.

“My, my. What other sort of depraved carnal pleasures are bouncing around in that head of yours, I wonder?” Astarion added, helping you sit up so that you were lounging between the two of them.

You shared a conspiratorial grin with both elves. “We have all night, if you’d like me to show you.”

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onlyswan · 8 months

Text

summary: in which jungkook is one of your greatest fears and you’re his achilles’ heel.

idol!jungkook x reader, est. relationship / fluff, angst / word count: 4.1k

content/warnings: i love you i want us both to eat well T_T sigh. oc has abandonment issues pls protect at all costs + oc is worried bc jk is working so hard :( + a worm (???) cameo. ily protective and hopeless romantic iw!jk <3 the ending 🥲💔 this drabble literally goes 📈📉

> in which masterlist!

note: *insert my melody mugshot scene* me if planting puzzle pieces in my drabbles + making oc cry (IM SORRY) were a crime. this was sm fun writing <3 i cried and laughed they’re so precious </3

—

“jungkook, baby?”

your silky voice fills the quiet apartment as you pad across the floor. you’re carrying your heeled mary janes by its straps, leaving you only in your white socks.

“babe?”

you frown as the seconds pass and you receive no response from your lover. there’s no music playing, no rustling somewhere in the kitchen or the living room. the lights are dim like they usually are, but the vivid colors are absent.

him? asleep at 9pm? jeon jungkook? it can’t be, but you’d be delighted to finally see him resting early if it was real.

and so, spurred by that tiny glimmer of hope, you carefully crack the bedroom door open, as if you’re fifteen again and you just came back from sneaking out of the house.

but you’re grown now; you live in a building with complete strangers for neighbors. you just got home from work, and you’re no longer used to sleeping alone because you share the bed with another person.

you find it empty. devoid of any creases, sign of life. as neat as a hotel room’s make believe that no one lived there until two hours prior.

the disappointment weighs down on your shoulders, causing them to drop.

he didn’t tell you he was going somewhere else after practice, you think to yourself as your lips permanently shape into a pout. what happened to going out with you for dinner?

agreeing, your empty stomach grumbles angrily.

maybe he got caught up at work. maybe he’s on his way home. maybe he’s on his way to the restaurant and he’s about to text you to come over. maybe he forgot about your plans and he’s having dinner with somebody else.

whatever the reason is, you’re too lazy and tired to whip up something edible on your own. with or without him, you’re going out and you’re stuffing your mouth full with rice and meat. after all, autumn is here, your dear old friend.

in search for a coat that will accompany you in your late-night stroll, you enter the walk-in closet and flip on the lightswitch.

you can count them with just your fingers— the amount of times you’ve felt this type of fear. absent eyes, melting spine, chills running to the top of your head down to your fingertips, mind racing with an overload of thoughts (it appears as a blank page, the same way that white is the presence of all colors of visible light). this fear… you associate it with impulsive mistakes, fire, police and ambulance sirens, and… empty closets.

jungkook’s side of the closet is empty.

clothes. shoes. bucket hats. beanies. belts. everything. gone.

but the floor is scattered with random pieces of clothing that look like they accidentally fell while someone was in a rush to pack them all in a bag. so in a rush that they didn’t even bother to pick them up.

your weak knees almost give way, but you force yourself to stumble backwards until your back hits the doorframe— you refuse to let yourself look like you’ve been carelessly discarded too.

not again. not again. not this goddamn vicious curse you thought you’ve already broken out of. not. again.

you blink away the tears threatening to spill as you scramble to open the zipper of your bag, but they spill anyway when your shoes clatter to the floor. you flinch at the thunderous sound, clutching your phone tightly against your chest. you keep your eyes closed throughout the defeaning silence that comes after.

the empty space mocks you. it knows your intricate design was not meant to live in an empty home.

you guess nothing much has changed. you’re still afraid of jungkook and his power to take away the sun, just as he did before, and you deeply despise being afraid. you don’t like it when the walls are closing in on you, poisoning your mind into believing that you’re small when the heart inside your chest burns with a fire brighter than that of the damn sun.

anyone would be foolish to leave you; it’s only jungkook who could have you mourning the death of the garden you’ve given the past five years of your life to.

—

jungkook returns to the apartment half an hour later. despite the long, grueling hours of dance practice he nearly didn’t survive, the excitement vibrating through his body is manifested through the lightness of his movements. he’s finally seeing his lover for the first time today… awake.

when he brought his natural body warmth along with him to the bathroom this morning, you sunk yourself further into mattress, beneath the thick blankets and against the soft pillows. by the time he had to give you your obligatory goodbye kiss before he leaves for work (or else you’d sulk about it for the rest of the week), half of your face has been hidden from sight. he was only able to press a loving kiss on your forehead, and then your eyelids that were fluttering as you dreamt.

night time comes and he is still deprived of the sight of your beautiful face? he somberly wonders as he finds you slumped over the dining table; he swears that there is a dark rain cloud hovering above you. your arms are thrown over the hardwood as they serve as a makeshift pillow for your vessel— his little firefly curiously bleak.

“baby? are you sick?” he asks, voice dripping with concern as he tenderly rubs your back.

the legs of the chair screeches against the tiled floor, neglectedly pushed behind.

“kook?” you manage to choke out, frantically sitting up once your muddled brain registered the familiarity of his touch on your bare skin.

his heart drops to his stomach as your tear-stained face comes into view. this isn’t how he envisioned your greeting; it usually came in the form of a bright light not harsh as the sunlight, a softness that begs to be held.

“are you crying?!”

your reply only comes out as a pitiful whimper. he stumbles a step backwards when you unceremoniously jump into his embrace, wrapping your arms over his shoulders. he gets a whiff of your sweet perfume, and then it becomes the air that he breathes, but he doesn’t have much time to revel in it.

“baby!”

he squeezes your waist taut against his body, affectionately nosing at your cheek before giving you a kiss. “did something happen? tell me- tell me.”

“jungkook,” your voice cracks as you utter his name, sounding almost like a plea, and then an endless string of heartbreaking sobs comes out muffled against his shirt. “where have you been?”

this sends him into a state of panic. seeing you in pain— it’s his biggest weakness. after all, you are his achilles’ heel.

“why? why, why, why?” you’re weak and pliant as he pulls your arms down, collapsing against his chest when he envelopes you in his embrace. he cradles your head in his palm, soothing you with gentle pats and shushes. “shh, shhh- it’s okay, i’m here now. everything’s okay, you hear me?”

his efforts prove to be fruitless, because you only seem to cry harder as he slowly rocks your bodies back and forth.

you shake your head, hands attempting to hold on to the back of his shirt to regain sensation in your limbs, but they miserably fail and fall on the sides of his hips.

“talk to me… please, mhmm?“ he hums quietly, pressing his soft lips to your temple. “tell me what’s wrong and your boyfriend will take care of it.”

from your sniffles to your hiccups, you remain unable to form any coherent response, and it leads his imagination to construct the worst possible scenarios. he feels his stomach turn with uneasiness, jaw clenching as he carefully pulls away to meet you eye-to-eye.

“did someone touch you? hurt you?” he spits out with urgency, and the unparalleled care he displays puts you in a daze, simply dumbfounded as he strokes your face. “huh, baby? just tell me and i’ll take care of the rest.”

now that you’re being reminded that jungkook could quite literally kill a person with his bare hands if they ever inflict harm on you, the fog is clearing up and you feel so incredibly… stupid.

but that’s more the reason why it’s difficult not to be sensitive when it comes to him; his absence proves to be lethal.

“shit, you’re scaring me.” he breathes out shakily as he taps your cheek lightly to bring you back to him, the distant look in your eyes triggering the emergency alarms in his head.

he unconsciously licks his lips and he tastes your tears; he doesn’t want anybody else to ever come this close.

“okay, okay- let’s put that aside for now. what do you need? should we go to bed and rest instead?”

“i thought you left,” you whisper as you hang your head in shame.

he blinks at you in confusion. “to where? my flight isn’t until next week, baby.”

fantastic! now you sound like the most dramatic, clingiest bitch to ever grace the planet. you bury your face in your hands to hide the battle zone between your heart and mind, but your boyfriend seizes your wrists because he can’t bear another second of it.

“is-is that why you’re upset…?” he asks with not a trace of malice or ridicule. he is only filled with guilt as it dawns on him then— how you’ve only gotten used to always having him around four years into your relationship, when he was taking a break from work.

the changes in his life are also changes in yours, but they still affect you in many different ways.

“then just come with me. i’ll make it work. maybe we can extend for a bit, spend an entire day by ourselves- there’s a lot of museu-”

“i thought you left,” you repeat yourself, exposed and vulnerable, vision swallowed by the darkness because you can’t make yourself look at him. “your clothes… they’re gone, and i was calling but you… you weren’t answering my calls so i thought…”

“my clothes?” he exclaims, eyes going wide as he realizes that they’ve accidentally slipped from his mind. “ahh, i thought about cleaning the closet while waiting for you so i moved everything to the other room!”

you open your mouth to speak, but much to your chagrin, no words come out. you purse your lips as your chin wobbles— the new wave of tears in your eyes mimic shiny crystals.

“____!”

and at the stern mention of your name, you know that you’re about to receive a (loving) scolding from your boyfriend. your lips curve into a frown before a sob inevitably escapes past them.

“why would you think that? why would i leave you? that doesn’t make sense at all, does it…?”

you shake your head, hugging him so tight, possibly tighter than you’ve ever done before. between your bodies, his heart is being unbearably wrung.

“i’m sorry, baby. seeing you cry like this breaks my heart…” he closes his eyes with a heavy sigh, resting his cheek on the side of your head. “but why would that be the first thing you think of…? i must be doing something wrong, right? have i been too busy with work? am i neglecting you?”

you’re breathless, a little dizzy— bloodshot eyes meeting his that are now gleaming with sadness. “no, it’s not like that! i just panicked, i couldn’t think straight.”

“are you sure?”

he looks at you skeptically, scanning your face.

“baby-” his voice breaks, then he pauses with his gaze still trained on you. “okay, i’m sorry. i… should’ve thought about what cleaning the closet would look like.”

“i was just being stupid.” you give him a small smile, rubbing your eyes to chase away the burning sensation. “sorry for scaring you.”

“stop, you’ll hurt yourself.” he tuts, pushing your wrists aside to cup your face in his hands, much gentler in comparison to your own self. his thumbs draw shapes on your soft skin, and then out of the blue, he curiously squeezes one of the space buns on top of your head. “wow, this is so pretty?”

“huh…? oh, thanks.” you mumble, still feeling out of it.

“this, too.” the white silk ribbon wrapped prettily around your neck, he means, which he hooks a finger on to tug lightly. it matches the lace straps on your shoulders that falls across the underbust of your dress, tied together to form a ribbon in the middle of it. that makes two, so clasically you.

and while it may be partly true that he’s trying to lighten the atmosphere, he just can’t defy the urge to express his admiration for you, even in a situation like this. he’s perpetually love-drunk.

“thank you.” you nod, shyly looking away to sniffle. “but you’re the reason why my makeup is ruined… need to wash it off before we go.”

“you’re beautiful either way, baby.”

“i know.” you scoff. “would you date me for five years if i wasn’t?”

he releases a throaty chuckle, capturing your lips in his with a smile of endearment that he fails to subdue.

“you’re so fucking cute. i love you-” he says with merely an inch of distance between you.

he grunts in melodramatic anguish, overcome by the insensity of his affections overflowing past the brim of his very being, leaning so close that the edge of the table digs into your lower back, surely to leave a temporary mark.

and he carries on to kiss you so many times that you lose count; you can only melt as you collect them in that bottomless pocket located somewhere in your soul, where all the love you’ve received across lifetimes is recorded to prove i was once here.

“i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you. i’m never leaving. you’re stuck with me and bam forever.”

if the time comes that the two of you break up, who would bam come home to? jungkook stubbornly refuses to have that conversation.

however, you still can’t let go of something, and you pout as you shove him lightly. unsurprisingly, his strong build doesn’t budge at all.

“but why didn’t you answer my calls?” at last, you gain enough energy to complain, but your face grows hot as the urge to cry returns. “i mean, what else was i supposed to think?!”

jungkook is struck by yet another lightning.

may the heavens have mercy, he’s been making you angry more than usual lately.

“shit, i forgot. i turned off my phone.” he mutters under his breath, feeling extremely regretful that he was not reachable when you needed him most to be. “i wanted to focus only on you tonight. what do they call it again…? leaving work at work?”

he winces guiltily.

“i’m sorry. maybe it wasn’t a smart idea.”

“no, i like that.” you almost interrupt him from talking because of how fast you are to brush off his apology.

he makes a mental note of it— the way you’re gripping at his shirt in small fists. you’re tense and overwhelmed; you need him to stay close.

“leave work at work. focus on me, and let me be your rest.”

unbeknownst to you, jungkook bites back his tears then. after all this time, he still gets mesmerized by the tenderness that naturally governs your every word and action; he thinks that he needs you more than you need him.

—

“just eat, baby. i’ll cook the meat for us.” jungkook coos at you as he cuts more meat into bite-sized pieces using a pair of kitchen shears.

“okay, then i’ll make sure that you eat.” you grin excitedly, dragging your chair closer to his.

you set down the tongs, grabbing your chopsticks to pick up a cooked piece of pork belly from the grill. you don’t forget to blow on it, mindful of burning his tongue.

of course, you don’t want to hurt him, but it would be especially painful for him as a singer.

“ahhh-” still busy with cooking, jungkook opens wide at your cue, catching the meat in between his teeth.

“rice,” he demands as he chews.

you scoop up rice from your bowl, and he devours it happily as he continues to flip the strips of pork belly lined up across the grill.

“mmhmm, it’s so delicious!” he dramatically says out loud. his eyebrows are knitted together and his legs are bouncing under the table, tell-tale signs of him enjoying the food.

witnessing this kind of reaction, any chef would be happy to slave away in the kitchen to serve him a meal. you recognize it in the smile of the owner after jungkook ordered more side dishes, and the way he dashed through the door to reduce the waiting time.

“yah, feed yourself, too!” jungkook chides you after you feed him meat three times in a row, but with an open palm that catches the juice that drips from the kimchi, you still tap your chopsticks against his lips. he spares it a glance before catching it using his tongue.

“i am!” you then rush to wrap a piece of pork belly in lettuce, dipping it into ssamjang before stuffing it into your mouth.

“good job, baby.” he grins in satisfaction, rubbing your back as praise. this makes you preen. “make sure to eat lots, got it?”

but then you’re back to spoiling him rotten, this time with an egg roll. so far, he has only touched his own chopsticks twice.

“i just told you to eat first!”

you glare at him, pouting. “but you worked so hard practicing today and you haven’t even eaten properly yet.”

he is too busy with work, and it’s not news that you’ve been worried sick about his health. it’s difficult to watch him work himself to the bone, but no one truly has the power to stop jungkook from doing what he wants, sometimes not even himself. and you find it impossible to fault him for it when you know that everything he does is done out of love. from the vigorous vocal and dance lessons, and to the deep cleaning of the apartment because his baby has been developing an allergy to dust.

“you need to make it up to your body. here, please?”

he loves being loved, jungkook thinks to himself as he eats the egg roll whole.

—

you were already prepared to go home after dinner, but your night owl for a boyfriend insisted on going on a walk at the park because he wanted to, and you quote, ‘see you awake for a little while longer,’ or whatever the hell he meant by that.

with his tattooed arm protectively swung over your shoulder, you’re engulfed in a wave of nostalgia. for the first two years of your relationship, before you started living together, you only met with each other at night, save for the very rare day-offs that he got. the only places that are still open after midnight are nightclubs, fastfood chains, convenience stores… and well, parks.

and he would always hold you close like this to make you feel safe, and the rest of you melts away while the side of your ribcage that he is pressed against remains to shelter your heart. on the contrary, you also remember how your bodies used to be so tense. you wanted to sacrifice more sleep and to walk to the other side of the park, of the street, to that other convenience store five blocks away because this one didn’t have the flavor of ice cream you wanted, anything… just… anything so you could be with each other ten minutes more.

and it was cold. it was always cold.

“what do you mean ‘it exploded’?”

“it seriously exploded! it was on fire! that’s why i went out to buy a new extension cord!”

“jungkook, it’s because you plug in too many things at once!” you cry out in frustration, your steps becoming heavy stomps. “i told you to stop doing that!”

“what do you mean? if it has six slots, doesn’t that mean six devices is the maximum?” he continues to stubbornly defend himself, and you can only hang your head in defeat. “otherwise, it’s a scam!”

“it is a scam! see…? they made you buy a ne-”

your sentence is cut short as your tongue gets paralyzed.

a dark and striped, long figure approaching ahead, slithering its across the grass.

your mind immediately registers it as the animal you fear most.

oh, no. no, no, no, no, no.

“jungkook,” you utter his name with a tremble.

the same fear you experienced only two hours ago holds you hostage once more, add all the hair in your body standing up and you’re as frightened as a cat.

“what’s wrong? yah! what are you doing?! baby, ba- fuck!” he sputters out as you forcefully pull him back along with you, displaying a type of strength and agility he doesn’t normally see.

the two of you continue to stumble backwards as you struggle to maintain balance, and somehow jungkook manages to switch your positions so that you’re the one who lands on top him instead of the other way around when you eventually end up as a heap on the soft earth.

he begins to feel his throat closing up at the sight of pure, genuine fear in your eyes.

“jungkook, snake- it’s small bu-”

you interrupt your own sentence with a high-pitched squeal, garnering looks from strangers moving and unmoving. in the blink of an eye, your boyfriend has swept you off your feet as if you’re light as a feather, driven by the instinct to protect the love of his life.

you cover your mouth in shock, your other arm coming up around his neck to keep yourself from falling.

you think you may have fallen for jungkook all over again.

“are you spiderman?”

he was too busy searching for the subject of your fear under dim lights, and so he looks at you in bewilderment to ask, “what was that?”

you shake your head with your wide eyes shining with faux innocence. you squeak. “nothing.”

he releases a sigh, followed by a chuckle of obvious relief and amusement as he squeezes your body closer to plant a kiss on your forehead. “aigoo, my ____! why are you so scared today? what am i going to do with you…? it’s just a worm.”

“are you sure? i swear i saw it raise its head!“

“i’m sure,” he lulls you. “i think worms can do that, too?”

your face twists in an expression of mixed bewilderment and distrust.

“that i’m not sure about, but it’s really just a worm! would i still be standing here if it wasn’t?” he clicks his tongue sharply. “we need to get your eyes rechecked.”

you roll your eyes with a huff. you’ve have had enough of his teasing before it even starts.

“uh?! i’m serious over here!”

this is new— you mean bickering with jungkook in a public place isn’t, but being carried by him like a bride while it happens definitely is.

“fine, i’ll go this weekend. happy?” you fake an obedient smile. “you can put me down now.”

he blinks, and then he adjusts the way he’s holding you to ensure that your dress won’t show what’s for his eyes only— for a split second, you were flying.

“i’ll go with you,”

“okay. now put me down.“ you tap his shoulder repeatedly to prompt him to heed your words. “babe, this is embarrassing!”

“nope,” he ignores your protest with nonchalance as he resumes to walk the path you’re on, evidently enjoying the attention he’s stealing and the way you’re curling yourself smaller to hide.

“oh my god! weren’t you just complaining about your body hurting?!”

“you were scared of me leaving,” he smiles, glancing down at you. “so now i’m gluing you to myself.”

that made you quiet for a while. inside your tote, the container of kimchi, wrapped in a plastic bag, rattles with his every stride. you noticed that jungkook loved it so much, so you ordered it to go when he went to the bathroom before you were to leave the restaurant.

“you know, we used to just hold hands,” you mumble with a childish pout. “like normal people?”

“this is very normal,” he argues.

the scenery becomes more familiar as he takes the long way home.

“some would even say romantic.”

a wave of nostalgia hits, and you visibly shiver.

you don’t know if he would remember, but he has said the same exact words once before.

you scrunch your nose, supposedly to give him a look of disgust, but a giddy smile betrays you. you are five years younger again, and the night ends with the moon bidding you an adieu.

—

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#jungkook #jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #jungkook drabble #jungkook one shot #jungkook scenario #jungkook imagine #jungkook fic #jungkook fanfic #jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #bts fluff #bts reaction #jungkook smut

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