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heyhihellowhatsup0 · 5 years

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Dark Webs (Dark! Peter Parker x Reader) - Chapter Three

Warnings: Topics of death, PTSD and depression, substance abuse, angst, violence (this chapter does get a little graphic for those sensitive to gore and violence) ignoring some of the MCU timeline/AU

Word Count: 5562 (A bit longer - but I promise, it’s worth it!)

Summary: Still not giving up on Peter, you continue to try and find a way to get him back. Only to find out that Peter has other plans for you...

A/N: Thank you all so much for giving me your feedback on this series! Please continue to send me your thoughts and if you want to be added to the taglist, please Inbox me or reply to the post! Love you all!!

Prologue | Chapter One | Chapter Two

“Look at what we got here! Peter’s lightsaber collection,” you teased him, panning his camera towards his shelves, “Jeez, Parker. I thought you were dorky, but didn’t think this much. You even have them alphabetized,” you let out a giggle, panning over each and every one slowly before Peter grabbed the camera away from you.

He pointed it towards you, extending his favorite lightsaber at you, “If you mock the Jedi, you must fight the Jedi!” Peter exclaims as he lights it up to show off for you.

“Yup, you just got dorkier,” you tell him with a laugh. You grabbed the the red one with a maniacal look, “The First Order will seize you now…” you told him as you lit your saber up to match his.

“No!” Peter shouts for dramatic effect, slamming his lightsaber up against yours. He let out a roar of laughter, his camera falling to the bed as he begins to get into his reenactment, “You’re dead, Y/N!”

You rolled your eyes as you fall on your back on his mattress, your lightsaber pressed up against his as he hovered over you, “Not today, Parker!” you shout back. But before he’s able to finish you off, you slide his plastic lightsaber into his own chest.

“Ugh!” Peter shouted out, pretending to die. He collapsed on top of you, making you laugh as he gurgled, “You killed me, you killed me!” He groaned as his hands went to his chest.

Peter turned his lightsaber off, sliding it into his belt loop with a confident look, “The force is strong with me. Don’t you ever forget it, Y/N,” Peter told you as he stuck his tongue out at you playfully.

You finally open your eyes, coming back to life as you sit up on your elbows, “You could never kill anyone, even if you wanted to,” you said to him, turning your lightsaber off and tossing it over to him.

“That’s a good thing, right?” Peter asked, giving you a look as he placed the lightsabers back in the organized order he had them in originally.

“I would say so. You don’t have a murderous bone in that spider-infected body of yours,” you joke, grabbing his camera and pointing it directly at him, “Am I wrong?” you tested him, zooming in on his face.

Peter inhaled, thinking about his response before he leaned forward closer to you. His face close to yours as he looked directly in your eyes instead of looking into the camera.

“Y/N, I’d never hurt anyone unless I really had to,” Peter said with seriousness in his eyes. You knew he was telling the truth right then and there and that he was certainly one of the good guys.

“Well the best part about having Spider-

“-Hey, you’ve been here a while, you okay?” Harry asked, poking his head into his office where you were sitting at his desk, trying to work on your next piece.

Startled at the sudden interruption, you slammed your laptop shut, wiping a tear away from your cheek as you tried to pretend that that video you watched wasn’t real.

“Uh, yeah. Just got a little side tracked, I think,” you told him, still feeling uneasy from the events that occurred last night, “I think I need to just finish this in the morning,” you finally decided.

Harry shuffled over, leaning his chin on your shoulder as he kissed below your ear, “Maybe you should call out from work tomorrow,” he suggested.

“I can’t, I have a deadline,” you let out a sigh, thinking about the article that needed to get done.

Late the other night when you were with Peter, some of the tech that Peter had stolen and given to Kingpin a few weeks ago was used in a local robbery from a hospital, stealing high tech medical supplies. Now you were convinced whoever was buying the tech from Kingpin was using it for further gain. This went far beyond Stark Technology and Peter.

“I may stop by the hospital and see if I can get behind the police tape too. You used to work for that hospital right?” You asked Harry, remembering he worked in the science labs there while working under his father before his passing, “Do you think maybe you could get me in there?”

“Y/N, stop!” Harry told you. He swiveled your chair around to look at you. Putting your face in between his palms, his crisp green eyes stared back at you with worry and fear, “You just came back with bruises up and down your arm and I didn’t ask what that was about. But now you want to go back out there? For what? For Spider-Man? To prove that none of this is your beloved Spider-Man? You’re going to get yourself killed, Y/N!” Harry said, trying to knock some sense into you.

“What has Spider-Man done for you in the last few months, Y/N? Come on,” Harry said a bit more aggressively.

You were silent. You wanted to be angry with him, but how could you be? Spider-Man had been missing since Tony Stark died. The remaining Avengers were doing their parts in all areas of the world, and New York was in utter chaos. In a time when the city needed Spider-Man the most, he ran away from his responsibility. And nothing that you were doing was helping.

Harry may not have been the biggest fan of Spider-Man, but many people weren’t. Especially now. And sadly, you were beginning to become one of those people.

“I know you’re trying, you want to bring Spider-Man back but,” Harry stopped, licking his lips in frustration, trying to form the words, “I don’t think he is coming back, Y/N. He’s...the one doing all of this, don’t you see?” He finally spoke the words that made you cringe.

“It’s not Spider-Man, it’s…” You trail off as tears form in your eyes as Harry continued to hold you still, swallowing the large pill stuck in your throat, “It’s just not him. I know for a fact that this isn’t Spider-Man. You have to trust me, Harry,” you told him as you felt your voice grow weaker.

Harry nodded, swiping a tear with his thumb, “I do trust you. But you have to trust me. You need a break from this,” He told you. The edges of his mouth curving to form a smile.

You knew Harry was just trying to protect you, but you couldn’t help but be annoyed at how nonchalant he was about all of this. This was your job, your career that you had chosen. Working for The Daily Bugle wasn’t exactly your dream publication, but it was a start. And you were getting really good at your job. Why couldn’t he see that?

But arguing with Harry wasn’t going to get you anywhere. If anything, it would just make him think your agitation just meant you needed even more time off. Which you didn’t, you were just agitated because Peter was making your job a living hell.

“I think I’m going to work from here tomorrow, and get this done,” You finally told him, trying your best to hide your irritation as he pulled his hands away from your face, “I’ll call the hospital in the morning to get some quotes, and then stop by my place and pick up some of my things?” You tell him, trying to ease his mind a bit, even though you were still annoyed.

You wanted to stop by your place anyway. You were running out of fresh clothes at Harry’s, and in addition, you knew you needed to get some of your notes about Peter’s plans in a safe place before Harry came snooping around. It was only a matter of time.

“How about I take you to dinner tomorrow night at that new lounge in the village?” Harry asks, pressing a gently kiss to your lips as he stands up and grabs one of his folders of paperwork from his desk.

You blink slowly, unable to process right away. You had so much going on right now, a date night was on the lowest portion of your to-do list, “Yeah. Sounds..uh, great,” You told him with a forced smile. He didn't seem to notice though.

Harry shut the door behind you, to leave you with your work again. You opened up the laptop, forgetting to X out of the video you were watching earlier. It started replaying again, and your thoughts went back to exactly how you were feeling earlier.

------

Peter tossed the bag of goods on the table. Pulling out the contents of the bag, one by one. The blasters, an older Chitauri gun, and last but certainly not least, Iron Spider. He was absolutely ready to part ways with that thing.

“This is the most powerful batch I’ve brought you so far,” Peter told Kingpin, putting a blaster on his hand and shooting it across the room, burning a hole into the wall in the blink of an eye.

Kingpin looked at the suit with a smirk, noticing it still in perfect condition, “That couldn’t have been easy to get,” He remarked, holding the suit in his hand to examine it.

“Nope. And the next heist I’m doing is going to be worse, so I’m gonna need an advance,” Peter answered back, folding his arms in front of his chest. He looked around the room, it was just him and Kingpin, surprisingly.

“Do you have any idea what this suit can do?” Kingpin asked, but it was more of him telling Peter. He looked down at it in awe, looking at the iron mask that came with it.

Of course Peter knew, he thought to himself. He wore it. He was in that thing when he died, and came back to life. He defeated Thanos in that stupid suit. He even witnessed Tony Stark, the man who made the suit for him, die while he was wearing it.

“Don’t know, don’t care,” Peter answered bluntly. He looked unamused when Kingpin shot him a menancing glare, “Anyway, I’ll take my money when you’re done fucking that stupid suit with your eyes,” He told him flatly.

Kingpin glared furiously at him, shocked that he was talking to him in such a manor, “I’ll give you 150k for the suit, 25k for the rest of it. I’ll give you 5k in advance if you can get the product here in three days,” He told him, staring down at the suit.

“Whatever, not the first time you fucked me over,” Peter scoffed at him. Money was money and he just wanted to get rid of the suit, “Whose buying this trash anyway?” He finally asked.

“New guy,” Kingpin answered, handing the suit over to his subordinate to put it in storage until it was sold, “Never met him, he just wires the money and we drop it off at his shipping station on the loading docks,” He answers Peter flatly, without even looking him in the eye.

Peter wrinkled his nose as his other peers walk over with his money waiting for him. He wasn’t in the mood to talk, he just wanted his money, maybe a drink, and to go home. Typically, he’d ask what this new guy was doing with it, but honestly, who cares. It’s not like Peter was doing any better when he was Spider-Man.

He grabbed the briefcase, tucking it under his arm. He didn’t thank Kingpin because, why would he? All Peter wanted was his money and to get the hell out of this shithole.

“That damn reporter!” Someone shouted, barging into the basement. It startled Peter, making him jump as he and Kingpin saw the guy running towards them holding a copy of The Daily Bugle, “She’s saying the hospital and Stark are connected,” He screamed, slamming a copy of the paper onto the table.

Peter looked and saw your name on the byline. Tensing his jaw, he folded his arms as he took a step back, “Well, they are,” He answered wisely.

“Shut up,” Kingpin lashed out at him, staring down at the paper as he read the first few paragraphs of the article on the cover of the paper.

New York Medical Center has fallen as the most recent victim in the recent burglaries that have been taking place across the city. The hospital’s laboratory was targeted, having over $3 million in supplies stolen. Supplies including radiation injections, several DNA kits, and other drugs such as oxycodone were taken from the lab.

Police have yet to comment on whether or not this robbery is linked with the recent ones that had taken place over at Stark Tower, but a recent matchbook from “The Devil’s Pin” bar was discovered at the hospital. Possibly making these two in fact, a connection to a possible mob heist.

“Who’s the fucking moron who dropped the matchbook in the hospital, huh?” Kingpin shouted, flinging the newspaper across the room with fury. He looked over at the two men who participated in the heist, staring at each other with terror.

He walked around as more people filled the room. Peter inhaled sharply, just wanting to get the hell out of here, “Can I go the fuck home? I wasn’t even a part of this hospital shit,” he told the group.

“Weren’t you the one we asked to take care of her to begin with?” Kingpin asked, walking closer to Peter with his cane in hand, “You call this taking care of her?” He asked.

Kingpin raised his cane over his head and brought it down hard onto Peter’s back, causing Peter to hit the floor instantly. He cussed as the pain stung throughout his body, trying to get back up slowly.

“I ought to kill you right now for getting us into this mess,” Kingpin said, pointing his cane directly underneath Peter’s chin.

Peter sat up a little more, his healing powers coming in stronger than he had thought as he felt himself get some of his strength back.

He wasn’t afraid of Kingpin. He wasn’t even afraid of dying at this point. He could take Kingpin and all of these guys out right now in a matter of seconds if he wanted to.

He just didn’t want to.

“If you want to kill me, then do it,” Peter groaned out, standing back up on his feet, “But you need me. I’m the only one who can get in Stark Tower without setting off alarms and get you your product. So if you want to kill me, kill me. But let’s be honest Fisk, I’m the best you got,” he spat at him.

Kingpin looked at Peter with thoughts running through his head. He looked back down at his cane, and then back again at Peter.

“Yes, I suppose you are a good resource. And it would be a shame to waste you,” Kingpin answered, his back towards Peter as he walked towards the group, “So let’s call this next task a punishment to clean up this mess you started,” He said, pointing towards two of the other guys that Peter knew were involved in the hospital robbery.

Kingpin handed the blasters Peter had stolen for him over to the two guys, pivoting back towards Peter, “Since you three screwed up, you three fix it,” he answered, taking Peter’s briefcase off of the floor, “Get rid of her, for good this time,” he said as he walked away, slamming the basement door shut on the three of them.

------

You look at the time on your phone and realize it’s already 6 PM. You promised Harry you’d meet him at the lounge for dinner by 7, which only gave you about an hour to head back to your apartment to grab some of your things.

Barging through your front door, you almost let out a sigh of relief. You hadn’t been home in about two weeks, and sometimes with Harry, it felt a bit suffocating. You missed having your apartment to yourself. It was much smaller in comparison to Harry’s penthouse, but, it was yours.

You grabbed some fresh clothes, stuffing them into your bag as you selected your favorite cocktail dress to change into before you went to meet up with Harry for your date along with a matching pair of heels. Maybe Harry was right, and a night out would be a decent enough distraction. At least for one night.

Taking your notebook with all of Peter’s blueprints and secrets in it, you figured you had enough notes at this point where you didn’t need it right now. You went in between your floorboards where you kept a bunch of things that confirmed your connection with Peter. Evidence, if you will.

Lifting the floorboards up, you stuck the notebook beside your favorite framed photograph of you and Peter. It was one of you both when you went to Coney Island on a school trip. You remembered you and Peter laughing as Ned got sick on Cyclone and MJ refused to go on any of the rides. But she took that photo of you and Peter. You brushed your thumb against the frame, letting all of the memories flood back to you. You turned your head away from it as you slid the floorboard back into place.

After changing into your cocktail dress, you heard your phone ring from the other room. It was probably Harry wondering if you caught the subway you told him you were going to take to meet him. He was already assuming you’d be late, you figured.

Glancing down at your phone, you didn't recognize the number. But Source had told you that he wouldn’t be contacting you for a while. No way this was him?

“Hello?” You answered the phone, continuing to pack your belongings in your bag. Your heels were beginning to make it a little more difficult to walk around, so you moved slowly around the apartment, making sure you had everything you wanted before you went back to Harry’s.

“Get out of there. Now,” The deep, dark voice said on the other line, “We got an alert that they are on their way to you, and they aren’t happy,” They said.

And then they hung up. That’s all you had was a short warning before there was a banging at the door. It was already too late. You run towards your drawer where you kept your stronger taser gun, and grabbed it.

You heard the door beginning to rattle, and there was no time left to leave. The only thing you could do was hide. But these guys were professionals, and just hiding in a closet was going to be the first place they would check.

Your apartment was a tiny one bedroom, and the hiding options were very limited. In the pinch you were in, you opted towards the fire escape. Crawling as close to the edge, and away from the window as possible.Your taser clutched in your hand as tightly as humanly possibly.

Placing your hand over your mouth, you turned your taser on when you heard the voices enter your apartment. They shined a flashlight into the living room and you could see the light being cast against the fire escape.

“Not in here,” one man with a deep voice said. You heard them stomping around with their boots as they made their way from room to room, “Do we even know if she lives here right now?”

“I don’t think she’s here,” someone said, a voice that you recognized.

Peter’s voice.

Your eyes grew as you heard his voice. Sounding so matter-of-fact as the flashlights scurried throughout your apartment. He came to kill you, that’s why Source was warning you to run.

Peter walked around your apartment, looking at the things that you had left around your place. No photographs, which seemed so unlike you. He remembered your old room, how you had Polaroid pictures of him, MJ, Ned, even Flash covering your wall. He remembered all the decals of quotes about friendship you had under each and every picture. He even remembered the particular quote you had underneath a photo of the two of you.

You were the one who got him into photography in the first place so it didn’t feel like you without photographs of you and your friends and your family. But Peter changed a lot, so he wouldn’t be surprised at all if you did as well.

“What makes you think that, Delaney?” the other one asked Peter, stepping into the bedroom. He pointed at the closet, noticing the clothes have been rummaged through.

“I think he’s trying to get out of this again, what’s up with you and this reporter?” the opposing one said, pointing at Peter. He gave him a shove against his chest, “Do you know her?!”

Peter wasn’t going to take anything from these two morons and shoved him right back, forgetting how strong he actually was and pushed him into the kitchen table, “No, I don’t fucking know her. I just don’t think she’s here,” he answered back.

The blonde guy didn’t like Peter’s aggression and wrapped Peter in a chokehold, pulling him backward to knock him off balance, “You know something we don’t there, Tony?” He asked him in a calm voice.

You grabbed your taser and unlocked it. Staying as quiet as you possibly could, you saw a good shot of the bigger guy who Peter knocked over still trying to get himself back up. While Peter and the blonde guy were squabbling you took a deep breath before pulling the trigger.

Aiming directly at him, you hoped that you were in a good enough range that it would attach to him. You squeezed the trigger gently, setting it off as the electric current ran a wire, clipping onto his neck.

You let out a sigh of relief as you unclipped the wire, watching him jolt and yell as he fell back onto the floor. The blonde guy threw Peter down, his eyes now on you as you stood still on the fire escape.

“And you said she wasn’t home,” he said as he smiled in your direction. He pulled the blaster out of his belt, and slid it onto his wrist, never taking his eyes off of you.

Recharging your taser, you tried to shoot at him, but he wasn’t close enough. Instead, it landed on the ground, right in front of Peter’s feet. You swallowed thickly, feeling a large lump forming in your throat.

I will not die today, you said to yourself as he took a step towards you with the blaster in his hand.

You looked over at Peter, dead in the eyes as he looked at the blonde guy walking towards you. He saw the look in your eyes, begging for him to help you. Begging for some sort of assistance. To become Spider-Man again and help you.

“I guess you’re not here looking for me to autograph your newspaper,” you told the blonde in a snarky tone, leaning up against the fire escape railing. You were trying your best to keep your composure, but on the inside, you were terrified.

He pointed the blaster right at you, “We gave you a warning, and you didn’t listen,” he reminded you, taking another step.

“Yeah, because I love listening to mobsters telling me how to do my job,” you leaned against the railing, with nowhere else to go but down. You took a glance at the height you were at and were beginning to regret taking the apartment on the twelfth floor.

The blonde guy had enough of you, and fired the blaster towards your foot. Your head hit the railing as you fell to the floor, your eyes still on Peter who wasn’t far behind him.

“I swear, I should’ve killed you instantly,” he told you as he stared down at you, groaning on the metal of the fire escape.

Peter froze, feeling his chest tighten…

“Karen, activate instant kill!”

All different types of armed creatures, coming after Peter. His iron arms and legs helping him out as he clawed his way through. Peter continued to web them up and fight, his abilities amplified in a way he never felt before. He observed limbs being torn off, and what he suspected was blood hit his face. He was killing, wasn’t he?

They weren’t human. But they were living, breathing things, weren’t they? They were beings and Peter was..killing them. Even if it was with the help of his suit, he still initiated it. He made the call to kill. He was the one responsible for ending their lives, regardless of whether or not they were attacking him.

He was the one who ended all of their lives. He pulled the trigger. Something he never done before...

“Ugh, I don’t got this! Help!”

Peter lunged after the blonde guy. He grabbed him by his scalp and brought his forehead down onto the railing of the fire escape. Blood sprayed out from the top of his head as Peter repeated his actions. You laid there motionless and in pain, trying to call for Peter to stop, but you could barely get your words out.

You watched as Peter took the blonde and pummeled him over and onto the ground. You tried screaming out for Peter, but still nothing. You were able to pick yourself back up as Peter pinned him down. He removed his blaster from his hand, and tossed it to the side.

“I knew it. I fucking knew it, you lying shit!” the blonde shouted at Peter. You looked over and saw someone you didn’t recognize anymore. Whoever that was, was no longer Peter, any hint of him that remained was gone now in this moment.

Peter screamed in his face before punching him right in his jaw. You could see the blood spurting out from his mouth as he kept punching. You stood there frozen, completely terrified as you watched Peter refusing to get off him.

You heard him gurgling over Peter’s wails between punches. There was already so much blood, and he was choking on it. Peter wasn’t even aware of his own strength, you thought. The sounds coming out of the both of them were some of the most unsettling sounds you’ve ever heard. Especially coming from Peter.

Finally feeling yourself coming back from the blast, you moved as quickly as you could over towards them. You pulled on Peter’s shoulders, trying to move him off of him, but he was too strong.

“Peter! Stop it! Stop, Peter!” you shout at him, realizing you called him by his full name in front of these guys.

But Peter took a sharp breath before giving him one last hit, right in his face, where you finally got a good look at him. A knot tied around your stomach when you realize exactly what Peter had done.

You managed to pull Peter off of him finally. His breathing was ragged and you could have sworn he was crying, he’d never tell you but, you could definitely hear it in his voice as he tried catching his breath. There was blood all over his knuckles, all over the metal, and his hair was drenched in his own sweat.

Both you and Peter stared down silently at the lifeless body, your hand on his shoulder as he managed to stand back up, “Fuck,” you breathed out, not sure of what you should or shouldn’t say right now. Maybe silence was the best way to go.

Peter leaned over the railing, beginning to empty his gut over the edge and onto the ground floor. You just stood there, completely helpless until you realized the two of you weren’t alone. You pivoted your head to turn back towards your apartment only to see the body was missing.

Just great, you thought.

“We need to call somebody,” You finally suggest, looking down at the body. You felt your stomach turning like Peter’s, wincing at the body that couldn’t stare back at you because it’s face was entirely deformed.

“Get out of here,” Peter finally spoke, wiping his face as he stared down at the body, “Don’t ever look for me again. Just get out of here,” he said, reaching down to pick him up.

You felt tears beginning to prick your eyes, noticing every hair was sticking up on Peter’s arms and neck, “No. Let me help you, I can figure this out,” you told him, hearing your voice quivering with fear.

“Don’t you fucking get it, Y/N?! I don’t want your help, I never asked! And because of you, look!” He practically screamed as he pointed towards the dead body lying beneath them, “So stay the fuck out of my life. I am not. Him. Anymore. Do you understand? I came here to kill you, Y/N!” He shouted.

You shook your head, swallowing what he told you harshly, “But you wouldn’t have done it,” You tried to say, but you weren’t even sure if that was the truth anymore.

“Yes it is. I am not your fucking Spider-Man anymore! I killed him just like I killed him, okay? Just like I killed Tony, so knock if off.” he screamed, now getting in your face.

The only thing you could do was nod your head. With Peter inches away from your face, venom in his eyes, and now, with a taste of blood; you weren’t sure how to answer other than to just agree with him. You were afraid. And Peter was no match for your taser gun. You hoped deep down, he wouldn’t actually hurt you. But you also believed at one point Peter wouldn’t hurt anybody. Maybe this meant you really needed to let go of Peter once and for all.

“Good,” Peter answered as he lifted the body over his head. He stood on the railing, and you finally saw his web shooter attached to his wrist, “Because I will not hesitate to kill you if you don’t,” he said before springing up to the next high-rise.

------

Peter stood on the loading dock with the human-sized garbage bag sitting by his feet. He stared down at the bag, gritting his teeth together with anger. Not even angry that he killed him, he knew it was only a matter of time before he had to since beginning to work for Kingpin.

No, he was angry that you made him do it. If it weren’t for you, he’d be able to get away with most of the stuff he did. Was he proud of stealing Stark’s technology for who knows what? No, but he wasn’t exactly proud of killing Tony either.

If it weren’t for you, he wouldn’t have been forced to go to your place and try and kill you to begin with. But you were still alive, because of Peter. And now, that was another thing Peter had to deal with now. He killed one of his own, and you were left alive. There was no way Kingpin was going to let Peter go scot free now.

Why the fuck did he even save you? It was as if something had come over him, and he had to kill this guy to make sure you could live another day. Even if that meant risking Peter’s now. No, he didn’t want you dead, but he also didn’t want you around him either. He needed you out of his life, and was willing to do anything to push you out. But you continued to make his life worse.

The police were already on the scene due to one of your neighbors calling about a noise issue. There weren’t any bodies for them to look at. There wasn’t even blood on the scene. Peter assumed you went back and cleaned up after him before the cops showed up, but he wasn’t sure how you snuck around them so quickly.

It was only a matter of time before Peter would see a report in The Daily Bugle that you had written, calling it another break-in, poking your nose where it didn’t belong, no matter how many countless times Peter had asked you to stop. You would never quit, and he hated it.

He was done saving you. He was done saving himself. Whatever happened, happened. If Kingpin found him and killed him, so be it. Maybe he was finally ready to die.

Shoving a few more rocks into the back to make sure it would go all the way down, Peter tied a knot on the end of the bag. He really was dead, Peter noted. His skin was cold and hard, and his eyes stared at Peter with total emptiness.

Peter swallowed, picking the body up in one swift motion. He inhaled sharply as he heaved the body into the river, the excess water splashing up and hitting Peter at his ankles as soon as it hit the water.

He stayed until the bag sank down, until he couldn’t see it anymore. It was almost as if the Peter you once knew was in the bag with him, sinking down to the very bottom of the river, and the new Peter could no longer do anything to try and save them, they were cold, hard, and dead.

Chapter Four

#tom holland #peter parker #spider-man #tom holland x reader #peter parker x reader #dark! peter parker #peter parker x you #tom holland imagine #spiderman x reader #spiderman #far from home

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hollyand-writes · 5 years

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A Review of the Year – Writing Meme 2018

I haven’t actually been tagged in this one this year, but I’m gonna do it anyway because I want to 😂 Here’s the 2017 writing review for comparison -- I was tagged for that one by @thejourneymaninn, who I tag again (among others at the bottom of this post! SORRY FOR TAGGING YOU ALL TWICE TODAY) for this year’s version ❤️

Most of 2018 was spent writing a book I was hired to write by a client, which was published at the end of summer, so I had to put all fanfic writing largely on hold until then. So -- considering how busy I was writing (and then later helping to edit and publish) The Book™, I’m happy with my output for 2018 tbh.

Strangely enough, while I certainly published fewer fics in 2018 than I did in 2017 (1 one-shot and updated 2 longfics), I actually wrote more words, both published and unpublished, despite being far busier professionally!

Total number of completed stories:

31 completed on AO3, 3 still in progress.

1 of those completed fics was written in 2018 (and 1 of the 3 longfics in progress was started in 2018).

Total word count:

47,213 words posted to AO3 in 2018 (226,518 total from 2013–2018)

Plus another 28,100 words written but not posted anywhere

Fandoms written in:

Dragon Age 2. I’m only interested in DA2 fic, and I don’t see that changing.

Looking back, did you expect to write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d expected?:

Until I did this review, I didn’t realise I actually wrote more in 2018 than I did in 2017, despite being so busy writing The Book™? Which has really shocked me -- I wasn’t actually expecting to write much this past year, but I didn’t realise I wrote as much as I actually had!

I wrote 75,313 words of fanfic in total in 2018 (compared to just under 59k in 2017, and about 150k in 2016) and won NaNoWriMo this year -- something I failed to do last year -- and published only one completed fanfic (an M!Handers one-shot) to AO3 during the year, while continuing another longfic started in 2017 and posting another longfic in 2018 (most of the latter was written in 2017, though, just not posted anywhere).

What’s your own favourite story of the year?:

I hate to admit it, but I’m going to have to say “A Chance Engagement” -- the Regency AU Carver/Merrill WIP written in the style of Jane Austen (currently 41,971 words and 25 chapters long), if only because I continue to have a ton of fun writing it, even though it’s hard work (especially with all the research) and it’s much harder to write than any other fic I’ve ever written.

Did you take any writing risks this year?:

I think the main risk I took in 2018 was publishing longfics before I actually finish writing them (like “Employer Relations”, the Gym AU M!Hawke/Anders WIP), especially with my poor track record of finishing WIPs I’ve posted on AO3. (I didn’t even get to update “The Templar And The Blood Mage” this year, let alone finish it, and that one’s been going since 2013!) So I guess I’m taking the risk that I might not finish the longfics I have in progress on AO3 😂

Last year I said “Everything I ever write and post is a risk, because I never know how anything will be received.” That also stands for this year, I think.

Do you have any fanfic or profit goals for the new year?:

I would like to finish and fully post at least one (ideally all three) of the DA2 longfics I’ve currently got in progress on AO3, and start FINALLY posting up (and finish writing) “How To Push Up A Daisy”, the Carver/Merrill Gym AU longfic I started writing in 2016(!!!)

Best story of the year?:

My one and only finished work published in 2018 is a 1,505-word fanfic called “Open Book” (rated M, pairing M!Hawke/Anders, canonverse setting), and while I wouldn’t call it my best story I suppose it is my best finished story, if only by default. With 483 hits, 49 kudos and 7 people leaving comments, it did OK on AO3 in my opinion, though.

In terms of my best story, though, that would probably go to one of my longfics in progress in 2018.