#this started out as bullet points BULLET POINTS at least i've polished it a bit more than that

[scyllas-revenge]

Leap of Faith

aka an Only One Bed headcanon with no context whatsoever

because this popped into my head and I wanted to be able to write and finish something for once god damn it. @the-girl-with-the-algebra-book this is for you 🥰

Legolas/Human Reader (gender-neutral)

Word count: 663

Rating: G

Read on AO3

New!! There’s a part 2 here!

Legolas is instantly flustered at the sight of the single bed, his eyes darting between you and the pillows and back again. Despite himself, he’s half-contemplating diving out the window to freedom—but at the look on your face, he forces himself to take a shuddering breath.

You’re more than happy to share the bed, you reassure him: there’s plenty of room, and you’re a heavy sleeper, so he won’t disturb you. But he rejects the offer smoothly. Elves do not sleep like mortals, of course, and he need not lie down to find his rest as you do.

For the first time, he regrets it.

Legolas is a gentleman: he turns away quickly as you slip out of your traveling clothes and boots and slide under the covers, but the rustling of your garments and slide of fabric against your skin is so loud in the silence of the little bedroom, so intimate, that his heartbeat lurches in his chest. By the time he risks a glance back at you, you’re buried in blankets and pillows, looking more at peace than he’s ever seen you.

And now there is nothing to do but wait for dawn.

He pours water over the coals in the fireplace as your breathing evens out in sleep. He paces quietly. He sighs. Time slips by, and his eyes dart to you more and more often.

He’s curious. That’s what he tells himself, anyway. Legolas has so rarely been around mortals, and the way they sleep is fascinating. You’re deeply, wholeheartedly asleep—no wide-open staring eyes, no mind still active and wandering, elf-like.  

He’s curious. Your chest rises and falls under the blankets, your breaths even, calm. In through the nose, with the slightest snore, then out through the mouth in a warm puff. He finds himself stepping closer to the bed, transfixed.

He’s curious. That’s all. His elven eyes can make out the darting of your pupils beneath their lids, the slight parting of your lips. He leans closer, unconsciously. Perhaps you’re dreaming—and he hopes, with a sudden jolt, that you’re dreaming of him. And as though in answer, your lashes flutter restlessly, a single word escaping your parted lips: “Legolas.”

Oh, fine. He’s far more than just curious.  

Legolas is perched on the bed beside you before he is aware of it, his heart in his throat. Perhaps it meant nothing—very likely it meant nothing, for rarely was there sense to be found in mortal dreams. He should move away, and stop staring longingly at your sleeping form. You would hardly appreciate it if you knew.

Or would you? You had invited him to share the bed with you, after all.

Thoroughly defeated, Legolas slips under the covers to join you. Even in sleep, you’re enough to overpower him. And even in sleep, you turn toward him, clutching at his torso and pressing yourself close. His breath hitches.

Your hands clutch tight to his tunic as you nuzzle into his side, and Legolas curls against you, your legs tangling together. A shudder runs through his body.

He breathes in and out as evenly as he can, in imitation of you, and closes his eyes against the pillows, just as you did. Perhaps he can sleep as you do, just this once, so he can survive this overwhelming closeness. Keep his eyes shut tight and his mind closed off from the world, so he can outlast it.

It frightens him for a moment—the uncertainty of his tight-shut eyes, the lack of awareness of the wider world. How odd this mortal sleep is. It feels like a leap of faith. But your breath is warm and even against his neck, your hair soft as it splays against the exposed skin of his neck and collarbone, and his heartbeat slows, sleep—true sleep—stealing over him at last.  

This leap is an easy one to take, for he has faith in you utterly.  

#legolas #lotr fanfic #legolas x reader #only one bed #oh god i've written in the present tense for real this time #what have i done #this started out as bullet points BULLET POINTS at least i've polished it a bit more than that

[minuy600]

The Ported Arcade Games of 1981 #0: 1980 Games I Missed

Back to the grind it is. Firstly, let's go over some stuff that has happened in these 4 months of complacency.

First things first; I've changed the format for these reviews again. There'll still be a 40 point scale of rating things, because I enjoy being consistent, however everything around it will be changed to something more... manageable for me. You'll see, I don't think there's a point in a lengthy explanation.

Secondly, I feel baaaad for the games I have to skip because it's multiplayer-only, or didn't get an accurate port in a game I have the means of owning. So i'll give 'em a mention, even if I won't go into detail about them, let alone grade them. Cool? Cool. Let's get this started then. Here's a game that actually got added to Arcade Archives during my LEGO-riddled hiatus...

Tank Battalion

Other name(s): タンクバタリアン (JP name) Developer: Namco Publisher: Namco (JP), GamePlan (US) Release date: October 1980 (JP) What did I play it on?: Arcade Archives on Switch What's the game about?: You're a tank fighting off other tanks by shooting bullets at each other. There's 20 of those per stage, and they alternate between hunting you down or your base (oddly shaped like an eagle). If you get hit too many times or your base gets destroyed, that's game over. What's the game look like?:

What's the sound like?: Rumblings of your tank, booming noises when you shoot and explode tanks. The occasional beep happens when you put in credit or gain an extra life. What's new about this one?: Most notably, any shot that hits a brick wall will break it bit by bit. Allows for a bit more strategy as you could carve out a shortcut. These walls are absent in every 3rd stage, though, so strategy flies out the window there for the most part. How much singleplayer content is there?: There's no real limit to how long you could keep playing, but aside from, oddly, the 22nd stage, there are no new layouts after the 8th. How far did I get?: I got to the 6th stage and felt verrrry satisfied to leave it there. I kinda feel that with enough luck, I could improve to the 8th eventually. That's my definitive goal, reaching stage 22 is nigh on impossible. Any multiplayer?: Errr, does alternating turns count? Quick thoughts: This feels almost laughably out of place when put alongside Namco's other 1980 contributions from the latter half of 1980. Still uses the Warp & Warp engine and it shows. Minor stage altering aside, which IS neat, this is another game where you feel like it left zero footprint. Graphics: Yyyyyeah. Even with the flat colors and basic as hell title screen, the game still appears to struggle to run with the admittedly fair amount of tanks on screen. I would've forgiven it a year ago, but now? Not when Pac-Man and Rally-X are around, sorry. (4/10) Sound: Another sign that this is a polished up geriatric, these noises are very close to the ones i've heard in Navarone and Cutie Q. I will admit though! I actually think the explosions are nice and impactful. Then again, most games of this era had that down pat. Could do without the beeps, but overall it's still decent. (6/10) Fun Factor: Unfortunately, the whole 'game struggling to run' thing makes this a hard game to salvage. It makes the controls way too... chunky, with the tanks moving in blocks rather than being smooth. The whole luck factor is also quite stupid, the tanks seem to do whatever they want in this one, even if WHERE they show up is consistent. It's a shame cuz I do feel there was potential to make it more manageable and consistently enjoyable... At least Battle City exists. (4/10) Longevity: It says a lot I managed 12th plays on the Hi Score ranking by only reaching stage 6. If your idea of fun is playing through 12 identical levels to get a single new layout, do I have the game for you. Still, getting to stage number 8 in itself is a big feat and despite how unfair it can be, it's still reasonably addicting. (6/10)

Conclusion: It's a cute attempt to innovate with outdated hardware. I don't think they succeeded due to how it plays like a creaky war veteran. Namco's talent made it not awful, but they've done a lot better before.

Onto a game that pretty much made me debate if it was even worth playing stuff outside of Arcade Archives...

Defender

Other name(s): ディフェンダー (JP name) Developer: Williams Electronics Publisher: Williams Electronics (EU/US), Taito (JP) Release date: December 1980 (EU, presumably) What did I play it on?: Midway Arcade Origins on Xbox 360 (played on Series S)

What's the game about?: You're a spaceship trying to avoid aliens from taking over the planet. They come in all shapes and sizes, first there's just some green alien dudes (called 'Landers') trying to snatch the 10 humans away by turning them into far more agressive mutants. Following that, you also get electric... squares that leave behind hurtful static and electric... pulses that turn into multiple small red particles. Gotta shoot those as well. Failing to protect the humans causes the planet to be destroyed and you're left fighting mutants in space. Yikes. At least you got an Asteroids-esque hyperspace button and screen-clearing smart bombs to delay the inevitable. What's the game look like?:

What's the sound like?: All kinds of weird alien bleep bloops dominate as you shoot your Atari 2600 laser. The humans that cry for help sound like squealing rubber. What's new about this one?: This game more or less created the horizontally scrolling shooter genre. The whole mutant thing is also brand new, and I don't think i've seen screen-clearing weapons used to this degree before. Same with the degree of variety in enemy patterns and how cleverly they've been interwoven as they've been given different 'tasks' of sorts. The lander chases the humans, the rest chase YOU. Also, uhhh... this is the first video game by Williams Electronics? Damn, that's one way to start. How much singleplayer content is there?: This took me ages to figure out cuz Midway Arcade Origins put me on the wrong foot, but it APPEARS that the difficulty peaks at stage 5. You don't get increased score multipliers after that, so... How far did I get?: I did get to that point when I gave myself 9 lives and 9 smart bombs, though that's hardly an achievement in my eyes. On the default setting (3 lives & smart bombs), I got to the third stage, which is a decent feat in itself as it propelled me up the online rankings. This game is brutal. Any multiplayer?: Alternating turns, again. Gonna be a bit before co-op becomes much more mainstream. Quick thoughts: Say hello to the game that brutalised my motivation to keep going. A very vague release date (i'm still not sure if I did it right), it's extreme difficulty and my own doubts on whether to cover games rereleased on Xbox made it the ideal cocktail for my ADHD brain to pretty much give up for a while. Upon revisiting though... Eh, although I don't think it'll ever be my favorite, I can appreciate it's huge influence on the shooter genre. Plus, if reaching the 3rd flipping stage is a serious achievement from what I can tell, I don't feel nearly as bad about my supposedly low skill level. This is another game i'll give a hat tilt. Graphics: Probably, PROBABLY the best looking space shooter thus far. I don't know for sure. But I mean, horizontal scrolling as smooth as this along with all the massive explosions that happen when things die, that's extremely impressive. Definitely makes it feel fairly modern, futuristic even. I'm surprised it is as much as a leap upwards as it is. Only Rally-X really comes close with being as advanced as this sucker. (9/10) Sound: Can get a bit overwhelming at times, all the shooting combined with the weird otherworldly noises, it's a bit much. Though nobody can deny that they sound COOL as hell on first impression. Very sci-fi. I'll let the incorporation of some 2600 noises pass. (7/10) Fun Factor: Depends on what you wanna get out of it. If you like games that will absolutely kick your ass with the smallest error and makes you feel extra guilty with every astronaut lost, this is a gaming HEAVEN for late 1980. I can't say i'm part of that crowd, but the more time I put into it, the less gruelling it becomes. There's only 2 things reeeally bothering me. You frequently have to be too precise with your movement to stick a shot or just straight up not die for one. The amount of buttons and therefore tactics on display, that's also a bit too much. Found myself frequently overwhelmed by this one, i'm sorry. If you're a gaming nut who doesn't mind an overload of spectacle and can deal with extra precise movements, then you can add two points to the score next to this sentence. (6/10) Longevity: Someone played one round of this game for 21 and a half hours straight. Huh. Reaching stage 6 will take you a WHILE, but at least it's a bit more based around skill rather than luck this time. There's people that only leave one astronaut alive or straight up lets them all die and focus on the shooting action, and manage to survive for a long while despite that. Seems like I may have to try that too... Also glitches. Lotsa glitches to extend playtime. Those are always a hoot. (8/10)

Conclusion in 3 sentences: My love-hate senses are tingling with this one. It's not a game for the faint of heart, but if you put your mind to it and grind it out, it can be a magical experience. Especially for the time.

The games that couldn't:

All of these are included on one of the Taito Legends games on PS2. The first game is outta reach entirely, while the second one is doable, just a bit too expensive to be worthwhile right now. I MIGHT come back to the balloon duology later. Don't count on it though.

Phoenix (Taito): Shame I couldn't give this one a go. This was THE game to bring boss battles into the mainstream. Was curious to see how well it'd fare compared to the seemingly very intricate way Sasuke vs. Commander did it. From first impression, it seems a bit less deep, though on it's own, it's still a fun spin on the ol' Space Invader formula.

Balloon Bomber (Taito): A hilariously out-of-tune jingle plays as you shoot single-colored balloons with bombs attached to them. ...Wait, did Pyoro on WarioWare copy the concept of destructible land from this game? Whaaaa?

Crazy Balloon (Taito): The balloon of Balloon Bomber fame must now traverse dangerous obstacle courses by floating around. Crrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaazy.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If there's any feedback you wanna give on this new format, be sure to let me know! We'll be heading into 1981 next time. For realsies.

#minuy600 #review #sona #arcade #taito #williams electronics #namco #tank battalion #defender #retro gaming #1980 #phoenix #crazy balloon #balloon bomber

[elizabethplaid]

feb 15 notes, part 2!

Today's a game of good-news/bad-news, but I'm feelin' pretty chuffed (not my usual slang, but it feels right). Notes from earlier in the day are here.

Starts with some bullet-points, then into slightly longer discussion of the near-future.

G- Was in bed and horizontal before 7:30am, phone down before 9am

B- Woke up a couple-few times, maybe got 4 hours of sleep total.

B- Woke by realizing I was picking at my skin in my sleep

G- Put on lotion instead of picking at my skin more, to help me calm down. Somewhat helpful? Clearly, I need to stim, but I need it in a more positive sense than picking.

N- Up and out of bed around 1:30ish. Little jittery but mentally fine.

G- Used acetone to remove my nail polish, then clipped my nails. It's been like 3-4 weeks since the last clip. (Should help with picking, I hope)

N- Nearly out of acetone. Considering I got that big bottle 10+ years ago, that's pretty good. Will need to get another bottle of that and maybe some non-acetone nail polish remover, specifically for non-hobby use.

G- Our late-xmas Amazon order items are arriving. Today was a new camera remote (for the dslr) and a Breaking Benjamin cd

------------

I plan to knit this evening, hopefully catch up with the YT videos I've been avoiding. (I'd wanted to be in a certain mindset while making the bracelets, so I limited what I'd watch during those instances.)

Need to revisit some of last night's music. There was a fun compilation of 90s music, and a few songs were delightful nostalgia. Got misty with a few, too. Those and the ASMR thing from earlier are things I want to make separate posts about. Not quite a "crying log" like @champagnemanagement does, but at least wanting to note things for this time period (eg February, the time I've set aside for mental health).

I've asked to have stew for dinner on Sunday. That day marks 11 years since mom has passed. I had some metaphoric connection of her passing/my grief and stew, but I've forgotten the exact words. It's a comfort meal; it's got more veg than other things I eat. Dad was always more of a cook than mom. He likes to do all the work for this meal, but I enjoy getting to chat with him while he chops veg and such.

Phone friend has expressed interest in visiting, which I've mentioned to dad before. I hope to discuss these plans with my dad, while he's busy prepping the stew. I think dad and phone friend would get along well in person. But we're gonna hang out in Ellsworth for this visit, rather than hanging out in my town. (I still plan to inflict the "Pledge of Allegiance" Burma Shave signs on them, muahaha.)

Amid all our texting, I've had some good insights - stuff worthy of recounting to my counselor. So I'm thinking of taking screenshots, then transcribing the images. I have another week until the next session, so I have time to at least skim for notes. I like having that record, for better recollection and processing of info for later.

Revisiting older notes from previous years earlier has been helpful. Certainly gives me perspective and comfort about how far I've come. When going through some books a couple days ago, I found my copy of Steven Levenkron's "Cutting: Understanding and Overcoming Self-Mutilation", including some notes I stashed between the pages. I'm curious to observe my growth since those days (ie 2009). Though I didn't cut, my skin-picking has been similar.

I know that this isn't LiveJournal, and I don't reveal all my thoughts and secrets like I used to on that platform. But I hope some of these discussions might help others, as I have been helped by others' writings over the years. The shame and stigma of mental health adventures will still linger, even as our cultural understanding develops over time. Sharing these bits of our inner-selves with others gives me hope that we'll be okay in the end. Progress is progress, even in tiny bits and steps.

#daily notes #mental health

[aceonice]

Hello, I've never done that before, but I would like to give you a prompt from the list: 22. Space AU + 18. Circus AU with Magnus Bane, Ragnor, Cat, Raphael and others of Magnus found family. I wouldn't say no to Malec either. But I like the focus on family and friendships. Uhm. I hope I did this right. I don't have a Tumblr site, but I'm Sashy on ao3.. Any way. Have a good day/night.

Sorry this took a while, but I’m so slow with prompts oops. Anyways, enjoy “Space Circus On Edom (Surprisingly It's Not A Crack Fic)” below or read on AO3.

When Magnus finds Camille cheating on him, he does what he does best. He runs.  

He doesn’t know where he’s going when he storms out of the apartment, his stuff thrown haphazardly into a duffle bag, but he knows he can’t stay there any longer. He’s considering buying the first flight he can find out of New Manchester when he stumbles across a worn poster. It’s torn at the edges and stained from rain, but the words are still bright, if slightly blurred, and it catches Magnus’ attention.

Got An Interesting Talent?  

Audition for the Space Circus!

Competitive salary with free room and board.  

Experiences you won’t find anywhere else!

Call the number below for more information.

Magnus has never been to space despite his continuous travels. At twenty-three he’s seen almost every part of the earth, but something (usually money) always kept him from  the space cruises.  

Now he pauses, runs a finger along the poster, feeling the torn edges and wondering if they’re still looking for performers.  

He’s not sure anywhere is far enough away from Camille, but space is probably his best bet. He programs the number into his phone and makes the call.

A day later Magnus takes the bullet train to Old London to audition. The entirety of his belongings, nothing more than the duffle bag he’d packed when he left the apartment. He knows that even if he doesn’t get into the Space Circus, he’s not going back. There’s nothing left for him in New Manchester.

But he does get in. The interviewers, long-time performers and high-ups in the lucrative industry, appreciate his ability to throw flaming batons while dancing around the room to an upbeat song, not missing a step.

He’d never put his talents together in that way, but he’d picked up juggling when he was twelve and living in New New York, an entirely man-made island built over where the state had sunk into the sea nearly a century ago. Then, at fifteen, he’d joined a dancing group for a year while visiting Spain. He’d continued learning on his own ever since.  

A week of practice was all it took for him to put together a routine impressive enough to get him a place in the circus aboard the Edom Spacecraft. It makes him wonder if they’re truly desperate of if he’s more talented than he believed, and he chooses to think it’s a combination of the two.

It only took another day after auditions before Magnus had signed all of the paperwork and read all about Edom. It was one of the most popular space crafts in the Space Circus industry. Edom was one of the many crafts that provided entertainment filled cruises to the moon and back, each trip lasting five weeks in totality. Magnus would be preforming five days a week for four weeks out of the cruise with the rest of the circus, having two days off as well as the week for which they were on the moon.

It’s a surreal experience being loaded into a pod ship with another new recruit, the pod set on an automatic course for Edom. They’re joining a week late, the craft already a week into its route the moon, but the hiring managers had been desperate for more performers. Something about someone getting horribly motion sick and having to leave, throwing the circus into disarray.  

Magnus takes a moment to study the inky blackness of space as they cross out of Earth’s atmosphere, the stars sparkling in the distance, the planet getting gradually smaller below them. He thinks perhaps he should feel sad to leave it behind, all of the people on earth, all of the places he’s been, all of the memories he’s made. He mostly feels excited and a little nervous. There will be people on Edom- only around three thousand compared to earth’s nine million- and there will be chances to make new memories. He thinks he might miss the greenery, the plant life and the scenery, but it’s been replaced with the sight of  space  and he can’t find himself to be disappointed in that.  

There was never much keeping him on earth anyways. The thought itself makes him a bit sad so, rather than focusing on that, Magnus turns to the man beside him.

He looks barely old enough for space travel, meaning he’s at least seventeen. His hair is cropped short and his lips are pursed tightly together. He could be a statue for how much he moves.

Magnus sticks out a hand, the black polish on his nails chipped away from the fresh application he’d done before the audition. “Magnus Bane.”

The kid studies him for a moment with a cool gaze before reluctantly shaking the proffered hand, his grip solid. “Raphael Santiago.”  

He has a slight Spanish accent that Magnus picks up on. “What’s your act?”

A hint of a smirk crosses Raphael’s lips. “I’m a knife thrower.”

Magnus raises an eyebrow. “Are you good?”

“I haven’t killed anyone yet,” Raphael says dryly. “What do you do?”

“I dance and throw fire.” Which, now that Magnus thinks about it, is probably the coolest profession he’s ever had. And it’s  in space.  It’ll certainly diversify his already staggered résumé.  

Raphael glances at his hands. “Have you ever burnt yourself?”

Magnus snorts at the question, turning his hands over to show his palms. A scar crosses the palm of his right hand, but they’re free of burns. “I use cold fire, just in case. It’s safer.”

“Boring,” Raphael mutters, but there’s a spark in his eye that suggests he’s interested.

They make easy conversation the rest of the ride, blatantly avoiding any talk of their pasts. It becomes abundantly clear to Magnus that he’s not the only one running away from something.  

When their pod lands in the hangar of the spacecraft, a woman with dark skin a kind smile greets them at the entrance. “Hi, welcome to Edom! I’m Catarina, but everyone calls me Cat. I’ll be working with you in the circus. I’m supposed to show you to your rooms and then to the dining hall so you can get acquainted with everyone. Actual training won’t start till tomorrow.”

She shakes Raphael’s hand and then Magnus’ as they introduce themselves. She hands them each a packet. “It has a map of the craft, the keys to your rooms and the staff hallways, and some additional information.”

She leads them down the hall, “It looks complicated at first, but you get the hang of it pretty fast. This is one of the main halls.” Magnus takes in every bit of it, admiring the long window that seems to run along the entire side of the ship, displaying the star-speckled sky. He can make out the moon in the distance. “They told me you’re a knife thrower. And Magnus, I heard you’re a fire baton-twirler.”

“That sounds correct,” Magnus says, refocusing on the woman leading them, “though I’ve never heard it called that. What do you do?”

Catarina grins back at him, dark eyes alight with joy. “You probably noticed the craft is gravity controlled?”

“I imagine people would be less interested in circus stunts if gravity wasn’t an issue,” Magnus muses.

She nods as she swipes her keycard over a lock and pulls open a heavy silver door. The hall behind it is all one shade of gray and Magnus has to assume it’s one of the staff halls. “Exactly. Even more so for aerial acts.”

“You do aerial?”

“Silks and trapeze,” she confirms with a bit of a smile. “I’m starting to learn lyra now.”

Magnus doesn’t know what most of those words mean but he nods along as if he does before asking, “How long have you been here?”  

A flicker of a shadow pass over Catarina’s face and her next words are spoken softly, “Almost two years. And now? I wouldn’t trade it for the world. Literally, I guess. But we’re here! Raphael, this is your room. Magnus, yours is the one across the hall.” She pointed to the corresponding doors. “You can leave your things here and we’ll head for the dining hall.”

Magnus took the time to set his single duffle bag on the bed in the center of the room. The bedroom isn’t large by any means, but it’s comfortable looking. It’s all shades of gray, remarkably similar to the hall but there’s a large window against the wall that shows the space unfolding around the ship. The bed is soft enough and there’s a dresser and a nightstand with a lamp. Magnus thinks it will make a decent living space.

“I know it’s not much,” Catarina says from the door. “But we get free meals and access to all ship activities as well.”

“It’s fine,” Magnus says as he joins her in the hall. Raphael is there as well, leaning against his door. “Not the worst place I’ve lived.”

“Seconded,” Raphael mutters, running a hand through his hair.

Catarina nods like she understands too well. Magnus supposes people with  nice  upbringings don’t run off to join the space circus. “Let’s get to the dining hall. I’ll introduce you to some more of the circus members.”

The dining hall is extravagant and filled to the brim. Soft, upbeat music plays over the speakers but it’s barely audible under the drone of conversation. Most of the occupants look like they make more in a day than Magnus has made in his entire life. They’re dressed in extravagant fashions, their hair styled perfectly. Although, some of them are wearing swimsuits and appear to be damp which makes Magnus wonder if the ship has a pool. He’s sure they’re all paying guests. People rich enough to afford space cruises.

There are several options for food which Catarina points out, informing them which booth has what kind of food. “You can get anything you want, but let me introduce you first.”

She leads them through the throngs of people to a table occupied by a large group. To Magnus’ relief, most of them are dressed fairly casually like himself. They don’t appear to be overly concerned with their looks. Catarina stops at the head of it and taps the man sitting closest on the shoulder. “Ragnor, this is Magnus and Raphael, they’re the new recruits.”

Ragnor studies them with a stone expression before nodding. When he speaks it’s with a distinctly British accent. “Welcome to Edom. Has Cat told you how the dining hall works?” He stands and places a kiss to Catarina’s cheek.  

“Of course I did. I just wanted to bring them over before they got food.”

With introductions out of the way, Magnus splits off from Catarina and Raphael to get Asian food while they head for the Italian booth. Ragnor accompanies Magnus, explaining that while the circus is technically run by a highly paid official in charge of the entertainment on Edom it’s handled mostly by him and Catarina for all intents and purposes.  

“I’ve been here five years,” Ragnor says as they fill their trays with a selection of mouth-watering food. “Best years of my life.”

“Catarina said something similar,” Magnus remembers “You really enjoy it?”

Ragnor nods. “There wasn’t much left on Earth for me. These people have become my family. You’ll understand soon.”

Family. Magnus hasn’t had anyone to associate with the word in longer than he cares to think about. It causes a pang of longing in his chest.  

“Of course, there’s nothing wrong with not being invested in the circus outside of training hours, you’re free to enjoy the craft and mingle with the cruise-goers, many people do. But a lot of us also tend to stick together, look out for each other. We’re the ones that are still here cruise after cruise.”  

The idea of having someone, multiple people even, who will look out for him feels foreign. He’s always looked out for those around him, the girls and boys he’d dated, but rarely did they return the favor. He desperately hoped what Ragnor was saying was true. “And what’s your act?”

“I help with a bit of everything, but my most interesting act is aerial stunts. Catarina and I do a few routines together.”

“I look forward to seeing that.”

“Everyone is fun to watch,” Ragnor says dismissively as they make their way back to the table, curving around the groups of people. “But you get used to it.”

Magnus blinks. “To being around ridiculously talented people?”

Ragnor smirks back at him, “To being around freaks. Oh, don’t look so offended, we’ve all made peace with it. I recommend you do the same- you'll be a lot happier here.”

He quietly sits down, contemplating Ragnor’s words. He supposes he’s never been  normal , what could it hurt to try on another label? Everyone did seem to be happy with their uniqueness.  

His first day of training is almost overwhelming. It goes by in a blur of names and faces and helping the others with their acts. Cat helps him with his dance, figuring out the parameters of it on the stage they’ll be using. He has to change a few steps, but it remains largely the same.

Somewhere near the end of practice Magnus finds himself watching Raphael practice, throwing knives at a spinning board around the cutout of a human body. His aim is perfect, each blade embedding into the board only an inch from the cutout.  

“Wow! You know this is my least favorite act to participate in, but at least it looks like you won’t be accidentally slicing me up!”

Magnus and Raphael turn at the sound of a new voice. Simon, one of the other members he’d been introduced to earlier, is at Raphael’s side. He looks less like a circus performer and more like an accountant in Magnus’ opinion. Then again, none of them really look how he imagined circus performers would. Certainly none of them wear clown makeup- thank goodness.  

“Only if you get on my nerves,” Raphael says in a way that Magnus  thinks  is sarcastic, but he doesn’t know Raphael well enough to be sure.  

Simon holds up his hands in a gesture of surrender. “Message received! Want to practice with a real body?”

Raphael nods and Magnus watches as he removes the cutout, helping Simon onto the board, latching the holds in place.  

Magnus feels his stomach twist in sympathy when the board begins to turn. He can’t imagine it’s fun to be up there. Still, Simon looks relatively calm. Raphael’s face is scrunched in careful concentration as the board begins its second rotation.  

Then Raphael lifts his hand and throws five blades in rapid succession. They land on either side of Simon’s head, one under each armpit, the last between his legs. Raphael goes to stop the board’s spinning while Magnus whistles lowly. “Impressive.”

“That’s always terrifying,” Simon mutters as he hops down. “But I’m unscathed so not bad.”

“Magnus!” Ragnor calls out for him. Magnus turns and sees him standing beside a lithe brunette. Ragnor waves him over. “Help me hold this.”

It’s a pole, long enough that when he picks up the other side, it puts a difference of at least fifteen feet between him and Ragnor.  

“Don’t drop it,” the brunette warns before climbing onto it and standing precariously on the thin bit of metal. She doesn’t weigh enough to make it truly heavy, but Magnus steadies his posture to ensure he won’t drop it. He’d hate to send a fellow performer to the medics on his first day.  

“Lift it to your chest,” Ragnor calls. Together they lift the pole. The brunette barely moves despite the change. Magnus watches as she takes several easy steps before jumping into a front flip, grabbing the pole with her hands to spin around it before righting herself.  

“Dot, watch your posture,” Catarina instructs as she comes to stand by Magnus’ side. Dot nods in response, clearly focusing on her routine and balance, before jumping into a cartwheel. Catarina turns to Magnus. “How’s your first day going so far?”

Magnus doesn’t take his eyes off Dot, carefully holding the pole as still as possible. “Everyone is amazing to watch.”

“Years of training. You’re not so bad yourself,” Catarina says, patting him on the shoulder. “If you can help out with Dot’s act regularly, we’d really appreciate it.”

“Of course, I’ll help however I can.”

“Great, thanks. Let me know if you need anything.” She moves away as Dot jumps off the bar, doing a backflip before landing on the floor.  

Magnus lowers the pole as she makes her way to him. She looks friendlier than when she had first approached him. “Thanks for not dropping me.”

“Of course.”

“You’re the new guy, right? Magnus or Raphael?”

He holds out a hand. “Magnus.”

Dot shakes it, looking him over, “I think you’ll fit in well here.”

He wonders if she’s calling him a freak, but he looks over the performers, takes in the smiles and looks of concentration and thinks being a freak might not be so bad if it comes with friends.

#my writing #sh fanfic #found family trope

[igb220-n10063013-blog]

Platformer Development

Ok wow so this week was...insightful. Learning the ins and outs of GDevelop took a lot longer than I was expecting, and I spent even more time just trying to get the platform-spear throw idea to work.

Thankfully the tutorial provided me with a pretty decent skeleton for a platformer, basic jumping and enemy "AI" so they can patrol around and be menacing, I basically just ripped this project for my own development as a good jumpstart (I even kept the name Bingus Platformer because the default model we were given looked like a good Bingus to me). In Chapter 7 of Game Design Workshop a Playcentric Approach to Creating Innovative Games (Fullerton, 2019), Fullerton discusses the loop/technique of visualising, building, playing, then refining or building upon a prototype, this method of design was much more helpful than I would have thought and I found it to be very fluid and engaging. She also emphasizes that a design should almost solely focus on "the fundamental mechanics, and if these mechanics can sustaint the interest of playtesters". Using this knowledge, as well as a bit of my learning from IGB181, I built a white-box style space with a single enemy in it to playtest my mechanics as I was designing and developing them. This would also force me to play the same pieces time and time again and eventually helped me polish and tweak little things here and there (such as the enemies model being slightly too high to jump over, so I added a double jump to make it easier and more expressive to move around, plus its cool ninja stuff).

Spear Mechanic Development

First things first was the core mechanic, throwing a spear. Immediately I realised I had absolutely no idea how to do anything more complex than a jump in GDevelop so consulting youtube was a must. I found a few tutorials recommending the use of bullets, which made a lot of sense to me I'm basically trying to create a projectile that sticks into walls. The bullets worked in that they shot out when I pressed the Q key and it was pretty straightforward to make it kill the enemy using collision/delete logic, I even gave it a spear model, but for the life of my I couldn't get it to stop when it hit a wall and turn into a platform.

Eventually after playing around for far too long, as well as realising that the the enemies "AI" was basically just a blank sprite with a force applied to it, I found my solution. Instead of creating bullets I could just create a platform object (I eventually made it a jumpthru platform) that looked like a spear and apply a force to it from wherever the player was standing and determining the direction using the same direction text variable assigned to the player, then if it hit a specific type of wall it would simply stop all momentum. Honestly this revelation alone felt amazing and it worked exactly how I wanted it to, at least at first glance.

Unfortunately because it was a platform the player would glitch in and out of it until the spear was safely far enough away, this required all kinds of weird fixes like fine tuning a spawn displacement over and over again.

Above is the basic whitebox I worked with to test features, at this point I added some simple instructions as well as an ammo mechanic, since I was planning on making ammo management part of the puzzles (EDIT: there were no puzzles created past me was far too ambitious, also the character is mid jump because screenshots require holding shift which is apparently a default jump button, fun).

I let two of my friends play this very basic concept as they were partly watching me develop the game on discord. One friend thought he was very cheeky finding an erant pixel outside the map to stand on.

and another found that a spear would get stuck in the wall if you were too close to it, the sacred benefits of testing have already become apparent (but also no, I didn't bother fixing this)

"Finished" Development

So its now been a week since I implemented the spear mechanic and here's what I've done .

I was far too ambitious in my pitch but this is the completed version for now so let's break it down with some quick thoughts.

Wanting to develop extra skills and abilties to unlock was beyond what I should have realistically expected given the time it took to develop what I have so far. (maybe slightly lazy but time was also a big factor)

A nice-ish backdrop was added as well as a decent level

While creating the level I realised it kinda bland to just have the same enemy over and over again, it was also pretty hard to think of new ways to throw a spear at a wall.

A jumping frog enemy was added, the samurai enemy could not be jumped on but would always drop a new spear, while the frog enemy was the opposite and forced you to risk goomba-stomping him or spend a spear

I added a little floating cloud (and a recall button to pull it to the starting point) the player would stand and have to keep up with while navigating a little challenge

Bonfire finishing point

Easter egg if you can finish the level with a spare spear and jump over the wall next to the bonfire (the easter egg has not been shown as while it adheres to player reward theories discussed by designers and academics, Im not so sure they would approve of my reward (no, its nothing vulgar just an inside joke for my friends who will playtest the game shortly))

A lot of this process was pretty straitforward thanks to me prior experimentation in my "white-box", I felt pretty comfortable coming up with new pieces of content and implementing/iterating upon them. One particularly interesting mechanic was in response to my friends very initial playtesting where they found it was cumbersome not being able to drop down from through your own spear (Terraria platform style).

I figured out how to make his suggestion work by disabling all spear objects platform behaviour upon pressing the down key, then re-enabling the behaviour once the player was falling fast enough (I tweaked this amount to be just enough to fall through and be caught by another spear just below it)

This logic for this mechanic is shown below, I've also thrown in the spear-platform logic as well because why not

So that's that, my level is finished in my eyes, time to move onto player testing and then the postmortem before checkpoint 1. Here's the link if you'd like to play it, not sure why the background doesn't work though: https://games.gdevelop-app.com/game-56eaf9d8-8391-4669-ab73-60f081963ef2/index.html

Fullerton, T. (2019). Game Design Workshop: A Playcentric Approach to Creating Innovative Games.

Re-Logic. (2011). Terraria [PC].

#development #platformer