#unless ryan finds this then i am sorry

[bunn-iiii]

Absolutely fucking crazy about George Ryan Ross the III

#I'm genuinely crying over him /srs #george ryan ross iii #Ryan Ross #i miss him #ryan ross i miss you and love you so much #please show signs of life #please I'm listening to all of pretty odd again and again rn #i want to google how to summon ryan ross #i went on a 10 minute text rant abt him in my fav discord server #I'm #very comforted by him and emotional about him #ryan please come back #i sound like an estranged ex or something #but I'm not #I'm just a random guy that really likes Ryan Ross #and i know this is really parasocial and soory about that but also I'm not sorry #unless ryan finds this then i am sorry #panic at the disco #ryan ross patd #ryan ross #ryan patd

[corroded-hellfire]

i love as you wish more than words can describe! and luke and ryan!! such sweet babies! i can't stop thinking about eddie and reader having their first fight (other than the conflict around the divorce n stuff) after things have gotten settled and the boys getting worried and scared they're going to break up just like mommy and daddy 🥺 xoxo

I’m so glad that you enjoy the series! @munson-blurbs and I had fun writing it—as we always do when we write together. I hope you like what we’ve come up with 🩵

Words: 1.2k

[As You Wish masterlist]

“Babe?” you call out from the bedroom. You’ve searched your closet up and down, but you can’t find the dress you’re supposed to wear. There’s no answer so you repeat yourself a bit louder. “Babe?!”

“Ya,” Eddie says, not bothering to mute the living room TV. He has Ryan on one side of him and Luke on the other; the three of them are engrossed in an episode of SpongeBob SquarePants. 

You sigh impatiently, resting your hands on your hips. “Where did you put my dress?”

“Huh?” Eddie answers absently. You can hear SpongeBob’s obnoxious laughter echoing through the apartment, which only irritates you further. “What dress?”

Throwing a robe on, you angrily march out to him. “The dress you picked up from the dry cleaners.” You watch as his eyes widen, and his gaze drops to the ground. “Eddie, you did pick up my dress from the dry cleaners, right?”

Eddie scrambles to his feet, slipping into his sneakers and grabbing his keys. “Shit, I’ll go get it right now.”

“It’s Sunday,” you mutter through gritted teeth, determined to keep your cool in front of the kids. “They’re closed on Sundays. That’s why I asked you to pick it up yesterday.”

“Sorry, baby,” he shrugs, “but you have a bunch of others, yeah? You can wear one of those.” He slides off his shoes and plops back onto the couch. “Crisis averted.”

Fuming, you grab the remote from the coffee table and press the power button, watching the colorful backdrop of Bikini Bottom fade to black. Ignoring Luke and Ryan’s disappointed groans, you turn to your boyfriend, lips pressed into a tight line. “Can I talk to you for a sec?” When he continues sitting there, a blank stare on his face, you elaborate. “In the room, please?”

It finally clicks in Eddie’s mind that you’re upset, and he slowly rises from the couch. The two of you are watching one another so you miss the look that the boys share on the couch. You turn around and stalk back into the bedroom. Eddie’s right on your heels and closes the door behind you. 

“Look, I’m sorry, okay?” Eddie says. “I forgot to swing by yesterday, but what’s the big deal? Why can’t you just find something else to wear?”

“That’s not the point, Eddie,” you say with a sigh. “I asked you specifically to pick this dress up for me and you didn’t.”

“Babe, it wasn’t intentional, I forgot.” He walks over and sits on the foot of the bed. 

“How does that make it any better?” you ask, voice rising. “When you ask me to do something, I do it. How am I supposed to feel when you forget about me?”

“Oh, come on,” Eddie says with a harsh bark of laughter. “I didn’t forget about you. I forgot to stop at the dry cleaners. While I was out running a million other different errands.”

“A million?” you snap. “You went to the grocery store and the bank! And the dry cleaners is next to the supermarket!”

“Jesus Christ,” Eddie huffs, pushing himself off the bed. He stomps over to the closet and yanks it open. He dramatically gestures to all the other dresses you have hanging in there. “Are none of these suitable for you, Your Highness? In my humble opinion, any of these would be fine. Unless you think someone is going to show up to the church in a ball gown.”

“Maybe I won’t go at all then,” you harrumph, crossing your arms over your chest in defiance. It’s childish and petty, but you’re too annoyed to care. 

“Yeah, okay,” Eddie rolls his eyes. “I’ll make sure to tell Theo that you missed his first communion because you had a wardrobe emergency.” He pronounces the last two words in a nasal, high-pitched tone. 

“Go right ahead and—” you start to retort, but you’re cut off by the sound of mumbling outside the door. 

“—get divorced?” You hear Luke’s tiny voice, laced with worry. 

“They have to be married to get divorced,” Ryan’s telling him. “They’re just gonna break up.”

“Shit,” Eddie breathes out, raking his fingers through his hair. “Didn’t know they were listening.” He opens the door and gives them a sheepish look. “Guys? You okay?”

“Please don’t break up!” Luke cries out, flinging himself into his dad’s legs. When he pulls back, you can see that his eyes are misty with the prospect of tears. 

Ryan, as usual, is a bit more reserved than his brother, but you can tell that he’s nervous, too. His silence speaks volumes as he looks at you through his long lashes. 

“Hey, hey,” Eddie murmurs, crouching down so he’s closer to their level. “No one’s breaking up, okay?”

“Then why were you fighting?” Luke asks, wiping at his cheeks. “You and Mom used to fight an’ then you got divorced.”

You sit on the ground, tucking your legs under you. “Sometimes, grown-ups fight. Even when they love each other. But it doesn’t mean they’ll break up.”

“Yeah,” Eddie agrees. “And we love each other very, very much. Almost as much as we love you two little eavesdroppers.” This elicits a giggle from Luke and a smile from Ryan. 

“How do you know if it’s a ‘love’ fight or a ‘break up’ fight?” the older boy pipes up. 

“Well, when you love someone, you can get frustrated with them or upset with them,” you explain, “but you take time to cool off so you can talk it out calmly later. That’s the difference; with a break up fight, you don’t wanna work it out.”

“Do you wanna work it out?” Ryan asks softly. 

You nod. “Of course. We’re not going to break up over a silly mistake.” You watch as he visibly relaxes, and you turn towards Eddie. “I’m sorry I snapped at you. And I didn’t have to be so dramatic about the whole thing, either.” You’re cringing internally just thinking about your empty threat not to go to the communion. 

“I’m sorry, too.” He takes your hand in his, rubbing his thumb over your knuckles. “I said I would do you a favor and I didn’t do it. I’d be mad, too.” He offers you a small smile. “Can we kiss and make up?”

“Eww!” Luke scrunches his nose and sticks out his tongue. “Daddy, you’re gonna get cooties!”

Eddie laughs, ruffling his son’s hair. “Nah, don’t worry about it. I got my cooties shot.” He leans in and kisses you with an exaggerated mwah! “Oh, no!” he says suddenly, shaking all of his limbs as though they’re moving uncontrollably. “The shot must’ve worn off. I’ve…I’ve been cootified!”

Ryan and Luke run away from him as he makes grabby hands, chasing them around the apartment. When the boys run by you, you block their path and hold them captive. “I’ve got ‘em!” you proudly announce. “I’ve kidnapped the fresh meat, King Cootie.”

Eddie bows in front of you, where his sons are wriggling in your grasp. “Excellent teamwork, my Queen.” He reaches out and tickles them until they’re complaining that they can’t breathe. 

“Okay, Cootie Family; let’s get ready,” he says. “Boys, nice clothes, please. Ryan, please make sure your brother isn’t wearing anything with a cartoon on it.”

Everyone goes to their rooms to get dressed, and Eddie sneaks up behind you, snaking his arms around your waist. “Seeing as you’ve already infected me with your cooties, can I have another kiss?” he mumbles into your ear. 

“I think that can be arranged, you nasty cootie monster,” you tease. 

“That’s King Cootie Monster to you.”

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson fan fiction #Eddie Munson fic #AYW #AYWS #request

[sunsetsandsunshine]

~ Ticklish Twins ~

HIII! SORRY FOR THE DELAY YOU GUYS! I HAD TO CATCH UP ON SOME LATE ASSIGNMENTS- BUT IT’S ALL GOOD NOW!

Ler’s: Donnie🐢💜, Leo🐢💙

Lee’s: Donnie🐢💜, Leo🐢💙

Warnings: None :) 

Summary: Ever since Leo and Donnie were little, they always argued over who was the older twin, which caused lots of fights throughout the years. But now Leo, being the smartest of the two (obviously), has a solution on how they could settle this once and for all…

——————————————————————————————————

“Nardo! Give me back my book!” 

“Oh what? You mean this book?” Leo grinned, examining the book he “stole” from Donnie, who was desperately trying to get it back. It was around evening and the two twins were sitting on the couch in the living room, earlier making a deal with each other that they wouldn’t bother one another unless it was important. Which Leo definitely did not keep. But what did Donnie expect? 

The two were wearing they’re signature sweatshirts, Donnie’s purple while Leo’s was blue. Now, originally, Donnie was going to get back into reading more advanced books, after the Invasion, lots of places were closed including the library. And if you knew Donatello you knew that he absolutely despised novels online. Sure, it makes the book you’re looking for easier to find, but it eliminates the whole purpose of getting a book itself, like actually in your hands. 

So now with stores finally opening up again, Donnie was able to purchase a book! But he didn’t even make it through the first chapter- let alone the first page as Leo swiped it from his hands. 

“Oh, come on, little bro. I was just poking fun!” Leo smiled, giving Donnie back his book that the softshell snatched out of his hands, glaring. Leo relaxed on the couch and pulled out his phone from his pocket; starting to watch YouTube videos on it. “I’m older than you, dipsit.” Donnie said, putting his book to the side and straightening his posture, which he only did when he was going to go really in depth with something…eugh boy.

“Pfft- since when?” Leo asked before Donnie could go into a 39 hour rant on how much he was right and how much Leo was wrong (he’s speaking from experience). “Since always! Were you not listening to Draxum’s 3 hour long summary on how he found us?” Donnie asked. Leo rolled his eyes, putting his phone on the arm of the couch. “Nope!” Leo said, making an exaggerated pop noise at the end of it. 

“Wait! I have an idea!” Leo beamed, clapping his hands together and turning to Donnie completely. “You…have an idea?” Donnie repeated, examining the person in front of him to make sure his twin didn’t get abducted by some aliens or something like that. Because when Leo has ideas, which is rare, they never turn out good- like…ever. 

Donnie sighed, pinching the space between his eyes and nose before looking back up at Leo, face. “Enlighten me, brother.” Leo grinned, tightening his mask on his head, while turning to Donnie fully. 

“Let’s compete! We’ll have a tickle fight on it. Winner is the older twin.” Leo smiled, grinning at the absolute genius idea and grinned only wider as he saw the evident nervousness on his soon-to-be-already-is-younger brothers’ face.

“I am not doing that.” Donnie said, crossing his arms; trying his absolute best not to sound nervous as he did so. Leo’s grin only widened at the softshell’s response, slowly inching closer to Donnie wiggling his fingers. “Aw~! But why? Is it because you're too ticklish for it? Is that it, Dee?” He teased, poking Donnie’s sides causing his purple-loving twin to squirm in his seat. “Is the Great Donatello Von Ryan too ticklish for this~?” Leo said, chuckling when he saw his brother’s cheeks flush a bit. 

“Oho gi- gihive me a break. Everyone knohows that you're the mohohost ticklish out of all of us.” Donnie said, wanting to punch himself in the face for laughing at Leo’s wiggling fingers. Speaking of Leo’s fingers, they were scaringly inching closer and closer to his sides…

“Well you’re gonna have to prove me wrong on that one, Tello!” Leo laughed, practically launching himself onto Donnie as he scattered and scratched along his sides. The softshell put both his hands over his mouth, determined to not laugh at. all. Because, has this tactic worked? Covering his mouth so he doesn’t erupt into laughter? No. No, it hasn’t. But oh well- Donnie was desperate and desperate times called for desperate measures.

“Oho my gOHOD stAhAh- PFFT- STAHA! GeHet OOHOFF!” Donnie cackled, his laughter sounding muffled against his hand as he kicked his feet. “Nope! None of that, you know better, Tickle-Tello!” Leo teased, removing Donnie’s hands from over his mouth as he kneaded his upper thighs.  

“NAHAHA! LEEHEEHEEO! NAHAHAHAT THEHEHERE!” Donnie squealed, hugging his middles and trying to squirm away from his sibling, Leo absolutely beamed at the reaction. “No can do, Don! Just admit it! I’m the older twin!” Leo grinned, now doing a whole spider maneuver with his fingers on Donnie’s neck, which caused his purple loving sibling to crunch up his shoulders and do a high pitched squeal, almost like a 6 year-old girl, or worse…Mikey. 

The sound startled Leo- who drawed his hands back and after a couple seconds descended into small snickers. “Woah, I’ve never heard that noise before~!” Leo laughed, going back to gently tickling Donnie’s neck where he squealed; gleeful at the reaction he just received and wanted more. 

“SHUHUT IHIT. YOHOU HEHEHEARD NOHOHOTHING!” Donnie yelled, pushing at Leo’s arms but the red eared slider did not budge even an inch. Leo went to the extra ticklish spot on Donnie’s neck earning another high pitched squeal from his scientist brother. “Oho, really? That cute little shriek of yours doesn’t sound like ‘nothing’ to me, Don-Don~!” Leo smiled, not only because he was 100% sure he’s got this in the barn but he was also smiling because he was spending some quality tickle time with his favorite twin (his only twin- but still), win-win!

“Just say I’m the older twin and I’ll stop, Tello~!” Leo said, now gently tracing the sides of Donnie’s shell. And if you weren’t in the room at this exact moment, you probably would have thought the soft shell got stabbed- or even killed! Donnie absolutely screamed as Leo started poking and prodding his sensitive softshell. Leo really wanted this “Older Twin” title huh? Going for his shell?! Oh this man is playing straight up fucking dirty. 

“NOHOHO! NOHO *hic* NAHAT THEHE SHEHELL! LEEHEEHEEO PLEHEHEASE!” Donnie cried, trying to kick Leo off of him but the blue banded turtle stayed on Donnie’s waist, making sure the two didn’t fall off of the couch but also making sure to tickle the absolute hell out of Donnie so he can claim the Older Twin title. 

“Awh! There’s a little design of your shell that has a heart! That’s so cute! You don’t mind me taking a closer look at it, do you?” Leo smiled, not even waiting for Donnie to answer as he traced over the heart design on Donnie, as the softshell descended into more squeaky cackles. “NAHAHA! NAHARDO *hic* DOHOHON’T! IHIT’S SOHO *hic* BAHAD THEHERE!” Donnie cried, still trying to squirm away. Now Donnie is really really starting to regret leaving his battle-shell in his room.  

“You’re not even fully fighting back like you normally do, Don. You must reaaaaally like this, huh?” Leo teased, going back to poking different parts of the side of Donnie’s shell. Donnie didn’t respond but just wheezed with laughter as he twisted and turned trying to get Leo off of him. 

“MIHIHICHAEL! RAHAPH! REEHEEHEE! HEHEHEHEHELP!” Donnie yelled, trying to be as loud as he could to get saved or something. Which… probably won’t happen because it’s just him and Leo in the lair as of right now. The others were running errands around the city. Worth a shot…

“Uh uh! This is a fight between you and me, mi hermano~!” Leo smiled, blowing a raspberry on the softshell turtles’ neck while still tickling the sides of his shell. Donnie gasped at the new sudden unexpected sensation at his neck, his laughter starting to sound hiccupy.  Donnie pushed on Leo’s plastron trying to break free from his grasp.

“NAHAHAH! NAHA- *hic* NAHARDO!” Donnie squealed. “Dooonnniiieeee~” Leo teased, mimicking his twins cry, sitting up but now hovering his hands over Donnie’s stomach, wiggling his fingers. 

“Hmm…I feel like TummyTello is feeling a tad bit left out from all this tickling, don’t you?” Leo asked, not to Donnie in particular though, the softshell knew he didn’t really have a say in this matter anymore. But Donnie couldn’t take anymore and completely PANICKED.  

Donnie suddenly kicked Leo in the foot, causing both of the twins to fall off of the couch, but Donnie, being quick on his feet, was able to take the upper hand as he went on top of Leo. He pinned Leo’s arms above his head as he straddled his waist, the slider squirmed under Donnie, not liking how quickly the tables had turned.

“Ahahany lahast words, Nardo?” Donnie smiled, still giggling from the attack from Leo but happy he was able to get the upper hand as of right now. And seeing how quickly his brothers’ cockiness and smugness faded made Donnie feel even more victorious. 

Donnie didn’t waste any time and immediately started kneading Leo’s knees, a well-known death spot for him. Donnie smiled as the slider threw his head back letting out squeaky cackles, snorting every now and again as his legs stomped on the floor. “DEEHEEHEE! NOHO WAHAHAIT! PLEHEHEASE *snort* IHIT TIHIHICKLES!” 

“Ohmigosh…really? I didn’t notice.” Donnie said sarcastically, suddenly stopping to give his brother a breather. Leo groaned throughout his laughs, glaring at his twin who just smiled innocently at him. “So~! Ready to admit the inevitable?”

Leo narrowed his eyes at his twin, oh he thinks he’s so smart. Well Leo’s not giving up that easily. “I already did! I’m older than you, remember?” Leo grinned as Donnie only chuckled, not saying anything. 

Donnie started scribbling his fingers on Leo's side, causing the slider to giggle a bit and lightly kick his feet. “Ahare yohou even trying to tickle me?” Leo asked, knowing that was probably the wrong thing to ask and couldn't help himself. Donnie sighed, now scribbling his fingers in Leo’s belly. “Oh Nardo, Nardo, Nardo…my dearest and dumb twin…” 

“I know something you don’t and the position you're in right now makes that extremely unfortunate for you.” Donnie smiled as if he wasn’t being absolutely evil. Leo swears- Donnie is scary just being himself but once your at the mercy of his tickly hands he’s terrifying. “Whahahat ahare yohou tahalking about…?” Leo asked. But as soon as he did Donnie started nibbling his stomach, making hilarious noises that had Leo in stitches. 

“AHAHA *snort* AHAHAHA WAHAHAIT!” Leo screamed, because if anything, Leo thought Donnie was going to abuse his knees again- not start nibbling at his stomach. He wasn’t prepared for this whole new ticklish sensation on his belly! This was completely unbearable…and the little “nom-ing” noises Donnie was making did not help. Guess Donnie took notes on where Leo was ticklish and how to tickle him there.

Or he just asked Raph, since he gives ticklish nibbles to him all of the time. 

“TEHEHELLOHOHO! NAHAHAT *snort* THOHOSE!” Leo cried, he tried to kick Donnie off of him which only caused the softshell turtle to nibble at his tummy more softly. Obviously causing his brothers' laughter to increase. “Donnie said no, no, no~” Donnie playfully said, holding Leo’s arms up higher and holding on tighter, laughing as Leo’s laughter increased in volume. 

“Oh, I bet that tickles, doesn’t it Lee?” Donnie chuckled, and only laughed harder when he saw Leo shake his head and stomped his feet on the floor. Leo couldn’t take it anymore. 

It tickled too much. Leo can’t even defend himself, which automatically makes this extremely unfair! So much for being the older twin, I guess…

“OKAHAHAY! OKAHAY! *snort* YOHOHU’RE OHOHOLDER! *snort*  YOHOU’RE OHOHOLDER!!!” Leo screamed. Oh dear pizza supreme in the sky, he was never gonna live this down. But to be fair, admitting being the younger twin is WAY better than dying by Donnie’s tickling hands, that’s for sure…even if Leo’s pride would be a tiny bit damaged after this.

“Sorry, what was that? I couldn’t quite hear you…” Donnie smiled, still nibbling at Leo’s stomach; which some might call mean- or even evil considering the slider already practically screamed bloody murder about freaking FINALLY admitting Donnie was older than him. But the scientist needs to make sure his little ticklish brother understands 

“YOHOU’RE THEHE *snort* OHOHOLDER TWIHIHIN!”

“Nardo, you’re gonna have to speak up~! I can’t hear you.”

“DOHOHONNIE *snort* IHI SWEHEHEAR!” 

“Alright, alright! No need to scream!” Donnie chuckled, getting off of Leo and crossing his arms triumphantly. Leo glared at him, puffing his cheeks out, pouting. “That was so unfair…” Leo whined, sitting up and sitting next to Donnie on the floor. Donnie looked at Leo and chuckled, raising his left eyebrow in amusement. “You’re the one that wanted it to be a tickle fight, idiot.” 

“Yeah! I know that! But I thought I would win!” Leo whined more loudly, slumping his entire body on Donnie’s lap. Donnie only chuckled, pulling Leo in closer, hugging them. “It’s not my fault you're a walking tickle spot.” Donnie argued.

Leo got up from his lap and crossed his arms, copying Donnie. “I am SO not! YOU PINNED MY ARMS UP! I COULDN’T DEFEND MYSELF!” Leo yelled which only caused the older of the two to snicker at the complaint. “Sounds like a walking tickle spot to me, still…” Leo rolled his eyes, sitting next to Donnie and resting his head on his shoulder as the two held hands, enjoying each other's company. 

“You…do know that if you won I’d still be older, right?” Donnie said, looking back to Leo who only wetly chuckled. “Pfft- I know that, Dee…” The slider said, because it was true, Donnie was older than Leo- by a month. After Draxum got accepted into the family, he had told them the WHOLE story on how he got them, including they’re exact ages. 

“But it’s just that…” 

“It’s just what?” 

“I just…missed this…messing around with you and stuff. After the Invasion, it hasn’t been the same, y’know?” Leo said, rubbing his fingers together trying to figure out the right words to say. “And I dunno, this might sound stupid but these moments with you are really fun…”

Donnie looked at Leo before smiling softly, giving him a hug and resting his chin on the top of Leo’s head as he melted into the embrace. “As it is true, you and I will not live on this Earth forever…knowing that, it is important to enjoy our time here while it lasts. And I’d not have anyone else other than you and our family and close friends spending that time with.” Donnie smiled, now both of them hugging each other and enjoying one another’s company.

——————————————————————————————————

THE DISASTER TWINS!!!

THE MIDNIGHT DUO!!!

THEY HAVE MY HEARRRRT I LOVE THEM 💜💙

Also, yes I’m an Older Donnie Twin Truther fight me 🤪😤 /j /lh

#Disaster Twins my beloved #Also I wanna make clear this isn’t an attack to the Older Twin Leo Truthers out there #This is just a HC I have #If u think Leo is older #Cool! I got no problem with that #We can respect each others HC’s and HOPEFULLY not start a war 😅🫡🫡🫡 #Like they HAD to have had a tickle fight to determine which of them was older #it just makes sense #AHHHH #Hope u guys liked this one; it was fun writing #rottmnt tickle #rottmnt tickle fic #tmnt tickle #disaster twins tickling #Lee!Donnie #Lee!Leo #Ler!Donnie #Ler!Leo

[perfectlysunny02]

You only hate Ryan because you ship bucktommy

if i didn’t ship bucktommy, i still wouldn’t like ryan. this is not a new thing. unless i am asked or involved in a conversation about an actor i don’t like, i will not talk about them. i don’t harass them like other people do on the internet. i don’t go out of my way to talk about why i don’t like them or make stuff up on twitter like yall do. i don’t do that.

i don’t like Ryan because my dad died of covid and Ryan was preaching about Covid and Nazi Germany. i also don’t like him because one of the reasons Edy Ganem is in S7 is because Ryan asked for her back. he’s actually said this several times. in fact, a lot of you were mad he followed her back on instagram at the start of the season. yall can claim he’s said sorry and he’s suffered enough, and he has. do i wish for anyone to be harassed like Ryan was, no. but i’ve also been suffering for years after my dad died, and i don’t have to like Ryan Guzman, the same way you guys don’t have to like Lou or forgive him.

he apologized for the racism thing, and clearly Aisha has forgiven him for it. and all i have to say about it is it’s kind of funny that you guys have forgiven him for it while also dragging lou like these people don’t deserve some grace.

the reasons i don’t like ryan are not reliant on a fictional ship, because if they were, i wouldn’t also ship buddie. i’m sick of anons finding their way into my inboxes with this shit, i’m sick of toxic BOBs and bucktommy shippers (whoever’s bitch ass said henren was ugly is going straight to fucking hell). i’m sick of all of it. leave people alone. it’s not that hard. you can ship what you ship without making shit up to bring another person down.

#911 abc #911 #sunny’s asks

[taiey]

@sarahsscrapbook @doctorwhobechdeltest

Bechdel analysis on series 11, first 5 episodes. Not as fully-formatted as Mewiet's work, but numbered. I judged petty conservatively on "is that line addressed to the woman who responds or a (mixed) group".

Bechdel-Wallace pass rate: 100%.

Two queer women speak to each other: Ghost Monument (Yaz and Angstrom) — unless you count the Doctor, which... I apparently don't..? think on balance it doesn't have quite the relevant import..? If you count the Doctor it's 100%, if you only count characters who are explicitly queer in a way modern-day humans could be it's just that, Frankie from Arachnids has a wife but dies without talking to any women.

Two women of colour speak to each other: Rosa (Rosa and Yaz), Arachnids (Yaz and Najia, briefly Yaz&Sonya and Yaz-Najia-Jade); 3-line exchange in Woman Who Fell to Earth (Yaz&Grace; disappointing!), two-line exchange in Tsuranga between Yaz and Mabli.

Total line length of exchanges: 58, 29, 68, 94, 117. the hypothetical infographics may need a new band of colour.

The Woman Who Fell to Earth     11.1     7 Oct 2018 1.    SONIA: She smashed it with a hammer! 2.    JANEY: Cos you keyed me nearside door! 3.    SONIA: Because you parked in my spot! 4.    JANEY: It's not your spot. There are no spots. 5.    YASMIN: Ladies, please! Thank you. Can I suggest a simple solution? You pay for her cracked window, you pay for her scratched door, and we all agree that parking round here is a nightmare but that grown-ups really shouldn't need to call the police to sort it out for them. Now, if we're all agreed on that, there's no need for me to take any further police action and we can all get on with our lives. What do you reckon?

6.    YASMIN: Hey! Hold on there please, madam. I need you to do as I say. This could be a potential crime scene. 7.    DOCTOR: Why are you calling me madam? 8.    YASMIN: Because you're a woman. 9.    DOCTOR: Am I? Does it suit me? 10.    YASMIN: What? 11.    DOCTOR: Oh yeah, I remember. Sorry, half an hour ago I was a white-haired Scotsman.

12.    DOCTOR: But the doors are locked. How did you both get in? 13.    YASMIN: Driver's window was smashed in. 14.    DOCTOR: What's your name? 15.    YASMIN: PC Khan, Hallamshire Police. 16.    DOCTOR: Name, not title. 17.    YASMIN: Yasmin Khan. Yaz to my friends. Can I have your name, please? 18.    DOCTOR: When I can remember it. 19.    YASMIN: You don't know your own name? 20.    DOCTOR: Course I know it. I just can't remember it.

21.    YASMIN: Wait. Can you stop, please? This could be a major incident. I'm the one in charge here. 22.    DOCTOR: What are you going to do? 23.    YASMIN: Call it in to my station. 24.    DOCTOR: What are you going to tell them? 25.    YASMIN: The facts. 26.    DOCTOR: Which are? 27.    YASMIN: The train was attacked. 28.    DOCTOR: By what? 29.    YASMIN: I need to take a look at CCTV footage. 30.    DOCTOR: And why do you need to check CCTV when we all saw it with our own eyes? 31.    YASMIN: I can't not report it. 32.    DOCTOR: You could hold off until we get the answers to the bigger questions. 33.    YASMIN: Which are? 34.    DOCTOR: What was it? Why is it here? Where's it going next? And, most importantly, how do we stop it? 'Cos whatever it is, I don't think it's done.

35.    YASMIN: I'm going to be in such trouble if they find out I were there. 36.    DOCTOR: Can we have the lights and siren on? 37.    YASMIN: No! I shouldn't be doing any of this. 38.    GRACE: Not Yasmin Khan? 39.    YASMIN: Hello, Ryan's Nan. 40.    GRACE: Haven't you done well for yourself, love. 41.    DOCTOR: Two weird things, one city, same night, makes me nervous. 42.    YASMIN: I'll see if there have been any more reports on that object. 43.    DOCTOR: Good, cos we need all the information we can get. Meet us back here. 44.    DOCTOR: Suddenly I feel really tired. 45.    GRACE: That was a big fall you had, love. We should get you checked out at A&E. 46.    DOCTOR: No, no, no. I never go anywhere that's just initials. 47.    GRACE: What's your best guess, love? 48.    DOCTOR: Two aliens, one city, one night. Best guess? Two species at war, using Earth as a battleground. 49.    YASMIN: Are you joking? 50.    DOCTOR: No, sorry.

51.    YASMIN: What do we do when we get up there? 52.    DOCTOR: Don't worry, I've got a plan. 53.    YASMIN: Really? 54.    DOCTOR: Well, I will have by the time we get to the top. 55.    YASMIN: So everything we saw, everything we've lied to people about, is this normal for you? 56.    DOCTOR: I'm just a traveller. Sometimes I see things need fixing, I do what I can. Except right now, I'm a traveller without a ship. I've stayed too long. I should get back to finding my Tardis. 57.    YASMIN: Doctor. Can I just say, you really need to get out of those clothes. 58.    DOCTOR: Right, yeah. It's been a long time since I bought women's clothes.

The Ghost Monument     11.2     14 Oct 2018 1.    ANGSTROM: Krin. 2.    DOCTOR: How much is a krin? 3.    ANGSTROM: 200 kavlons. 4.    ANGSTROM: I've never seen so much water. 5.    YASMIN: You're Albarian, he said? 6.    ANGSTROM: Yes. The planet of Albar. It's tiny. Crammed full of rusting high-rises. Everyone wants to leave any way they can. Even more so since... 7.    YASMIN: Since what? 8.    ANGSTROM: I don't know you. 9.    DOCTOR: How many stages are there in the rally? 10.    ANGSTROM: This time? 209 terrains, 94 planets. We start the race with nothing and barter our way up. 11.    DOCTOR: Is it worth it? 12.    ANGSTROM: To ensure enough for my family's safety? Yeah. Albar is being systematically cleansed. Half of my family are in hiding. The others are on the run. This is my only chance to bring us back together. 13.    YASMIN: So you left your family to do this? 14.    ANGSTROM: I left my family to try and save my family. They told me to. If I win, I find them, rescue them. If they're alive to be rescued. Whatever happens here, it's a better chance than I had back home. 15.    YASMIN: You're making me miss my family. That's quite some achievement, considering my dad drives me bananas and my sister's trying to get me to move out so she can have my bedroom. And I only saw them yesterday. 16.    ANGSTROM: Don't ever take them for granted. God, you all look shattered. 17.    DOCTOR: You should all rest. I'll wake you when we get there. 18.    ANGSTROM: How did you even do that? 19.    DOCTOR: Did I not mention? I am really smart. 20.    ANGSTROM: Thank you. 21.    DOCTOR: You are very welcome. Amazing what you can learn from a SniperBot. 22.    ANGSTROM: This exit ladder will take us up and out to the surface. 23.    YASMIN: What's up there? 24.    ANGSTROM: Acetylene fields. 25.    DOCTOR: I thought maybe you didn't believe me that I'd get you home. 26.    YASMIN: I thought you didn't believe yourself for a second back there. 27.    DOCTOR: Who, me? No. Never doubted. Don't know what you mean. Home, then? 28.    YASMIN: You can get us there? Really? 29.    DOCTOR: Start believing.

Rosa     11.3     21 Oct 2018 1.    YASMIN: Should we know what artron energy is? 2.    DOCTOR: It's the same type of energy the Tardis runs off. There really shouldn't be traces of artron energy here, unless they're ours, which they're not. 3.    YASMIN: And now you want to check it out. 4.    DOCTOR: Yeah, I should. Quick look, but quietly. History is very delicate. We stick together. 5.    DOCTOR: Brilliant. Rosa Parks. Lovely to meet you, Rosa Parks. Big fan. 6.    ROSA: Excuse me? 7.    DOCTOR: Big fan... of Montgomery. I am... we are just visiting. Recommend anything for tourists like us? 8.    ROSA: I recommend you get yourselves the hell out of Alabama before you find yourselves in trouble you can't get out of. 9.    DOCTOR: Okay, listen. I can deal with this. You guys go back to the Tardis and be safe. 10.    YASMIN: While you do what? 11.    DOCTOR: Locate the source of these energy anomalies. We're one day out of a tipping point in Earth history. I don't want anything disrupting that. It's easy for me here. It's more dangerous for you. You can walk away from this. 12.    DOCTOR: This is where the artron signals converge. At the bus company. 13.    YASMIN: All roads lead to Rosa Parks. 14.    DOCTOR: Yeah. Bit of a worry. Let's have a look around. 15.    YASMIN: Evening. She was coming home from work. I remember cos she said people thought she didn't stand cos she was tired from working, but she wasn't. 16.    DOCTOR: Where did she work? 17.    YASMIN: I think it was in a shop, like a department store. 18.    YASMIN: Hi. Nice to see you again. Mrs Parks, right? 19.    ROSA: Yes. 20.    DOCTOR: You helped us out earlier today with our little misunderstanding. 21.    ROSA: I remember. British. 22.    DOCTOR: Yes. Funny thing, you'll never believe this, we're actually doing market research for bus companies. Looking at people's transport habits. Answer the questions, enter the raffle for a prize. You get this bus this time every day? 23.    ROSA: Most days. Always this time. 24.    DOCTOR: And you live...? 25.    ROSA: Cleveland Court. Next stop. Ma'am, if you keep sitting there, we're all going to have to move. 26.    ROSA: If I win your raffle, will that give me the right to sit anywhere I want on this bus? 27.    DOCTOR: No. 28.    ROSA: I didn't think so. This is my stop. 29.    DOCTOR: Mrs Parks, enormous clothing emergency. Can you help me? 30.    ROSA: That is one nasty tear. 31.    YASMIN: Yes, it is. And there is nothing us Brits hate more than a clothing emergency. 32.    DOCTOR: Mrs Parks, I have to go out in that coat this evening, and if it's torn I'll get in such trouble. 33.    YASMIN: Can you take a look at it now? Double time Christmas bonus? 34.    ROSA: (checks her work book) Well, I don't have any collections until tomorrow afternoon. I guess I could fit you in. Now, if you come back just before we close... 35.    YASMIN: I'll wait while you work. Keep you company. 36.    ROSA: I don't need company. 37.    DOCTOR: No, but my coat does. It's very valuable. I don't usually let it out of my sight. Thank you. You're going to make a big difference. 38.    ROSA: Oh, I'd best set to work, then. 39.    DOCTOR: Don't let her out of your sight.

40.    YASMIN: Have you always wanted to be a seamstress? 41.    ROSA: I dreamed of being a teacher, but my grandmother got sick, then my mother, so that was the end of school. 42.    YASMIN: I'm sorry about that. 43.    ROSA: Oh, I got myself educated. Just took longer than I thought. 44.    YASMIN: But you kept going. 45.    ROSA: Always. An education makes you unstoppable. 46.    YASMIN: Everything here's a fight for you. Don't you get tired? What keeps you going? 47.    ROSA: Promise of tomorrow. When today isn't working, tomorrow is what you have. You married? Got a job back home? 48.    YASMIN: Not married, and I'm a police officer. 49.    ROSA: You're police? 50.    YASMIN: Yeah. Just starting. Not where I want to be. 51.    ROSA: Hmm. Where is it you want to be? 52.    YASMIN: In charge. 53.    ROSA: (laughs) Amen to that. 54.    YASMIN: Shouldn't you be finishing up? 55.    ROSA: If a job is worth doing, it is worth doing well. 56.    YASMIN: But don't you have a bus to get? 57.    ROSA: I can always walk.

58.    ROSA: I think that should just about... 59.    YASMIN: Love it. Let's go. I'll walk you out. Pay you on the way. 60.    ROSA: Oh. 61.    DOCTOR: Yaz, you're here. How's it going? 62.    YASMIN: Mrs Parks fixed your coat. 63.    DOCTOR: Oh, thank you, Mrs Parks. Beautiful work. Much appreciated. 64.    ROSA: You're welcome, ma'am.

65.    YASMIN: What's the matter? What are you doing? 66.    DOCTOR: Counting seats. 67.    YASMIN: Has it worked? Have we done enough? 68.    DOCTOR: I don't know.

Arachnids in the UK     11.4     28 Oct 2018 1.    YASMIN: What're you going to do now? 2.    DOCTOR: Oh, you know. Back in the box. There's loads to see. 3.    YASMIN: By yourself? 4.    DOCTOR: Yeah, I suppose. 5.    YASMIN: Do you want to come for tea at mine? 6.    DOCTOR: Definitely! Yes, I would. Thanks. I love tea. Tea at Yaz's? Amazing. 7.    YASMIN: Hi, Mum. 8.    NAJIA [hotel reception]: Hey. Can you pick me up from work? 9.    YASMIN: What, now? I'm just in the middle of... 10.    NAJIA [hotel reception]: Yes, now. It's urgent. I'll text you the address. Don't let on to your dad. I'll tell you everything when I see you. 11.    YASMIN: Fine. 12.    NAJIA [hotel reception]: Thanks, sweetheart. 13.    SONYA: Married to the job. 14.    YASMIN: At least I've got a job to be married to. Bye. 15.    SONYA: Hope you don't crash. 16.    DOCTOR: I mean, I could open the door. 17.    JADE: What, like, break it in? 18.    DOCTOR: No, just sort the lock. If you thought it was appropriate. If you're worried about her. 19.    JADE: I am. 20.    NAJIA: Quick, get in before anyone sees. 21.    YASMIN: Hi! 22.    NAJIA: Oh! What's the big hug for? I only saw you this morning. 23.    YASMIN: Yeah, well, it feels longer. This is well swanky. 24.    NAJIA: Don't get attached. We need to go. 25.    YASMIN: Can I not have a quick look round? 26.    NAJIA: No, Yaz. I've been sacked. 27.    YASMIN: What? Mum! But you've just started. 28.    NAJIA: I know. 29.    YASMIN: They can't do that. What happened?

30.    JADE: We reckon there could be around 21 quadrillion spiders on the planet in total. 31.    DOCTOR: So what sort of research are you doing in here? 32.    JADE: We're interested in utilising the genetic strengths of arachnids. Ordinary spider silk is as strong as steel or as tough as Kevlar. 33.    DOCTOR: Did Anna have access to your experiments? 34.    JADE: No, she was on the admin team. Everything we do here is secure. We discard all carcasses responsibly through a specialist company. Unless she was taking things without us knowing, but... she's not that kind of person. I should notify the police. 35.    DOCTOR: What is it you wanted to show us? 36.    JADE: Reports of unusual spider activity in Sheffield over the last three months, from the police, pest controllers, and to us here. Rare sightings, an increase in numbers, spiders you don't normally see at this time of year. 37.    DOCTOR: Something's wrong with the spider ecosystem in South Yorkshire. 38.    JADE: Exactly. But we don't know what. They have nothing in common. Different species, different quantities. Some are large massings, some have been a profusion of web-building. I can't work out if they're confused, or angry or scared. 39.    DOCTOR: Or trying to send a message. 40.    JADE: What are you doing? 41.    DOCTOR: Where's that?

42.    NAJIA: Did you hear that? 43.    YASMIN: Yeah.  (Yasmin goes to the internal wall and carefully puts her ear to it. We are shown the giant spider on the other side. Najia's phone rings.) 44.    NAJIA: Hello? Yeah. It's for you. It's a doctor. 45.    YASMIN: Hi, Doctor. You're never going to believe it. 46.    DOCTOR: Are you at the hotel where your mum works? 47.    YASMIN [OC]: Yeah. 48.    DOCTOR: Can you let us in? 49.    DOCTOR: (hugs Najia) Hi, Yaz's mum. 50.    NAJIA: Najia. Yaz, they can't be here. 51.    DOCTOR: Najia, you made a very awesome human. Tell me what's going on. 52.    YASMIN: The room next door is covered in cobwebs, top to bottom. 53.    DOCTOR: Just like your neighbour's house. 54.    YASMIN: What? 55.    DOCTOR: Big spider problem in this city right now, Yaz. Glad to be home? 56.    NAJIA: I know the way out. 57.    DOCTOR: Everyone, follow Yaz's mum. 58.    NAJIA: It's Najia.

59.    JADE: They're trying to make the whole hotel their web. 60.    DOCTOR: And we're the flies. We're not leaving. We have to find out why they're here and stop them getting any further. We need to find a safe haven. Yaz's mum? 61.    NAJIA: Kitchen? 62.    DOCTOR: Lead on. 63.    DOCTOR: Any issues with spiders before today, Najia, here or at home? 64.    NAJIA: My home? 65.    DOCTOR: One of your neighbours had a spider problem. The link between both places is you. 66.    DOCTOR: Are you sure? 67.    NAJIA: Sorry, but who are you? How'd you know my daughter? Why have I never met you before? 68.    YASMIN: Oh, not now. 69.    NAJIA: Yes, now. It's not a difficult question. 70.    DOCTOR: It is a bit of a long answer. 71.    NAJIA: Well, I've got time. 72.    DOCTOR: But I haven't. Not right now. 73.    NAJIA: Are you two seeing each other? 74.    DOCTOR: I don't think so. Are we? 75.    YASMIN: We're friends. 76.    DOCTOR: Hmm. 77.    YASMIN: I owe the Doctor my life, quite a few times over. 78.    NAJIA: What's that even supposed to mean? 79.    YASMIN: Please can we not have this conversation now? 80.    YASMIN: Why are they in cocoons? 81.    DOCTOR: I think they're being stored as food. 82.    JADE: Spiders don't eat people. 83.    DOCTOR: I said they're being stored. They haven't eaten them. They're outsized and confused. All their behavioural patterns have been disrupted. How did they get like this? 84.    JADE: It doesn't make any sense. This is not what spiders do. 85.    YASMIN: Have you seen what's down here? 86.    JADE: It's landfill. 87.    NAJIA: Is that what the smell is? It goes on for miles. 88.    DOCTOR: And down.

89.    DOCTOR: Because spiders can keep growing as long as they live. 90.    JADE: What if our waste included something that we thought was dead, but was still just alive? 91.    DOCTOR: And with enough food in all that waste to survive, and enough toxicity to mutate and to keep on growing. 92.    DOCTOR: It's grown too big. 93.    JADE: She's suffocating. She's got too big to breathe efficiently. Even moving around in here, it's using up what little oxygen she can absorb. She won't survive for long. She's more scared of us than we are of her. 94.    DOCTOR: I'm so sorry this has happened to you.

The Tsuranga Conundrum     11.5     4 Nov 2018 1.    DOCTOR: Nobody move. (scans it) If I can keep it in temporal lock... No, it's got too many sensors, it won't work. It was camouflaged! This is someone's idea of a nasty joke. 2.    YASMIN: What is it? 3.    DOCTOR: Sonic mine. It's counting down. 4.    DOCTOR: You're mentioned in the Book of Celebrants. You helped defeat the Army of the Aeons at the Battle of the Underkind. 5.    CICERO: I was one of many. 6.    DOCTOR: You're a bit of a legend, though. 7.    CICERO: And who are you? 8.    DOCTOR: I'm the Doctor. 9.    CICERO: Wait. I've heard that name. Aren't you in the Book of Celebrants? Isn't there a whole chapter about you? 10.    DOCTOR: Me? No. Very common name. Anyway, lovely chatting. Must be off. Hope you all get better soon. 11.    DOCTOR: You can do this. 12.    MABLI: Right. Yeah. I can. 13.    DOCTOR: What did you want to show us? 14.    MABLI: Well, if I sync my ocular recorders with the databanks... MABLI: All Tsuranga medics are implanted with lenses so we can record all treatments for training purposes, lawsuits, data records. YASMIN: Like a posh version of my uniform camera.

15.    DOCTOR: Too fast to chase and capture, too toxic to touch directly. It's a bit of a puzzler. 16.    MABLI: It's going to kill us all, isn't it? 17.    DOCTOR: Whoa, Mabli! You went there way too quick. I said a puzzler, not a death sentence. I mean, it's a bit of a challenge, and I can't quite see the solution yet, but that's life. Or medicine. Patients present problems, you figure them out and come up with solutions. That's what this is. A problem to be diagnosed. Medicine to be administered. You're a medic, I'm the Doctor. 18.    MABLI: A doctor of medicine? 19.    DOCTOR: Well, medicine, science, engineering, candyfloss, Lego, philosophy, music, problems, people, hope. Mostly hope. 20.    MABLI: I'm struggling to see much hope here. 21.    DOCTOR: It doesn't just offer itself up. You have to use your imagination. Imagine the solution and work to make it a reality. Whole worlds pivot on acts of imagination. 22.    MABLI: So what are you imagining now? 23.    DOCTOR: Broadly, I'm imagining that thing off this ship. Specifically, I'm trying to imagine the answer to the question, what does it want? 24.    MABLI: Does it have to want anything? 25.    DOCTOR: Every living thing, from the tiniest to the largest, wants something. Food, survival, peace.

26.    MABLI: But the first thing it did was kill Astos. That must be what it wants to do to all of us. 27.    DOCTOR: You know, there's a much faster way back to Resus One. Why is it routing us this way? 28.    MABLI: Asteroid field. Fast-moving asteroids all around. Really unpredictable. (An alarm sounds.) 29.    DOCTOR: What are these? 30.    MABLI: They're... bad. This craft has over 5,000 different scan sensors. They're constantly feeding back to Resus One. They monitor everything, both internally and externally, check the routing's stable and there are no hostile forms, however microbial, on board. The systems have detected the Pting. They're asking us to confirm or deny anything's wrong. We can't take a creature like that back to Resus One. There's thousands of vulnerable patients. 31.    DOCTOR: And if we confirm it's on board? 32.    MABLI: They'll recommend evacuation. 33.    DOCTOR: But we can't evacuate. 34.    MABLI: They go straight to RST. Remote structural termination. They destroy the ship. 35.    DOCTOR: Right.     Nothing wrong. We're fine. 36.    MABLI: We can't keep doing that. Three dismissals and they don't believe you. Precautionary detonation. 37.    DOCTOR: Oh, great. Who designed that? So this ship either gets destroyed by that creature, or by control from Resus One? 38.    MABLI: Yeah. Sorry.

39.    DOCTOR: I thought there'd be more questions. 40.    CICERO: I've encountered a Pting before. It massacred my fleet. 41.    DOCTOR: Okay. What did you learn about them? What do they want? 42.    CICERO: They kill. Relentlessly. 43.    MABLI: It must've got to the central systems. That means we'll soon lose oxygen and heat. 44.    CICERO: It'll go for whatever's powering the craft next. 45.    MABLI: We're on an anti-matter drive. 46.    CICERO: We could use stazers to defend ourselves. They can stun it briefly. Got any on board? 47.    MABLI: A couple, I think, in here. 48.    CICERO: If we're going to live through this... 49.    MABLI+CICERO+DOCTOR: Protect the anti-matter drive! 50.    DOCTOR: Snap! 51.    CICERO: Can we get to Resus One any faster than currently routed? 52.    DOCTOR: Not without breaking the ship's auto-routing, which would send a signal back to Resus One. 53.    CICERO: And they'd go straight to Hostility Protocols. 54.    DOCTOR: I could create a false positive route signal to send back, but there's no manual controls in the NavChamber. 55.    CICERO: Show us.

56.    DOCTOR: Everything okay? 57.    CICERO: Yeah. 58.    DOCTOR: With me, please. 59.     YASMIN: Where do you think it is right now? 60.    DOCTOR: I don't know. I can't trace it since the diagnostic systems drained. 61.    MABLI: Doctor, quick word, private. 62.    DOCTOR: Catch you up. Go on. 63.    MABLI: Eve Cicero. Her condition... 64.    DOCTOR: What about it? 65.    MABLI: Patient confidentiality. I can't discuss with you. But if you're a doctor, maybe you should examine her. I've got to go.

66.    DOCTOR: Sorry, where are we? Oh, anti-matter drive. What century is this? 67.    CICERO: Are you joking? 68.    DOCTOR: No. We travel in Time. 69.    CICERO: Are you joking now? 70.    DOCTOR: No. 71.    DURKAS: 67th. 72.    DOCTOR: Ah. Nice century. Bit tricky in the middle. It turns out all right in the end. See this, Yaz? Anti-matter drive. 73.    YASMIN: Oh. I did a bit on anti-matter at school. Never quite understood it. 74.    DOCTOR: The thing with anti-matter is you have to either find it or generate it. That's what this bit does. Particle accelerator. 75.    YASMIN: Like at CERN? We did that in physics. No, but the thing at CERN is massive. 76.    DOCTOR: In your time, generating anti-matter cost a massive amount of money. This is progress. Things get smaller, faster and cheaper. This is like the iPhone version of CERN, accelerating enough particles to power this entire craft. 77.    YASMIN: So how does it work? 78.    DOCTOR: The particle accelerator smashes the atoms together, like a little anti-matter factory, to produce positrons, which are then stored very carefully inside electric and magnetic fields. The positrons interact with the fuel materials to produce heat, which produces thrust. 79.    DURKAS: It's pretty old school, this one. 80.    DOCTOR: It's beautiful. Anti-matter powering the movement of matter. Bringing positrons into existence to move other forms of life across space. I love it. Conceptually, and actually. Yaz, you have to keep this safe from the Pting. If this drive gets destroyed, this ship will lose propulsion, we'll drift endlessly while the Pting... 81.    YASMIN: I get it. It won't be good.

82.    DOCTOR: Why are you on this ship, General? 83.    CICERO: Corton fever. Contracted it on my last duty. Can't quite shake it. What are you doing? 84.    DOCTOR: Hmm. Why would you be using adrenaline blockers for corton fever? 85.    CICERO: How do you know about the blockers? 86.    DOCTOR: Your slow pulse, my really good hearing. You asked Ronan for some. It isn't corton fever, is it. Is it pilot's heart? I'm sorry, Eve, but if we're going to survive this, you need to be honest with me. 87.    CICERO: I started as a pulse pilot. I graduated to Neuro Fleet Commander faster than anyone in Keeban history. I'm the most decorated general. I'm the poster woman. I cannot have pilot's heart. I cannot be that example to others. 88.    DOCTOR: But you have. And you've been using more and more blocker shots to get through the day. 89.    CICERO: Trying to control the surges of adrenaline around the heart. One big surge could kill me. 90.    CICERO: Ever flown that way? 91.    DOCTOR: No, but you could talk me through it. 92.    CICERO: It takes people a dozen years to train. 93.    DOCTOR: Oh, I really need to spend more time in the 67th century. 94.    CICERO: I know how to do this. I'm not stopping now. Everyone's going to live. Including me!

95.    DOCTOR: Mabli said that Resus One would terminate the ship if they found a Pting on board. How would they do that? It's too far for missiles. It has to be the same for every Tsurangan Rescue Craft. It's built in. Self-detonation. 96.    YASMIN: Bingo. 97.    DOCTOR: Ten points for Yasmin Khan. And yes, I am keeping score, for all of you. 98.    DOCTOR: Pick a number between 1 and 100. 99.    YASMIN: 51. 100.    DOCTOR: Pentagonal number. Interesting. 101.    (She sonicks the bomb and the countdown beeps start.) 102.    DOCTOR: Get in that corner. 103.    YASMIN: What was the number for? 104.    DOCTOR: Number of seconds before the bomb goes off. I moved it forward a bit. 105.    YASMIN: What? I would've gone higher! 106.    DOCTOR: Good number, 51. 107.     YASMIN: I'm really trusting you on this bomb, but I don't know what you're doing. 108.    DOCTOR: Think of the Pting as a mouse, and the bomb as a piece of cheese. 109.    YASMIN: A very large piece of cheese about to explode and take us all with it. 110.    DOCTOR: It's not a perfect analogy, I'll admit. You could've picked a bigger number. Where is it? Come on.

111.    DOCTOR: As the bomb gets closer, the energy's building, getting ready to blow. The Pting must be attracted to that, surely. That's what I've been working on this whole time. Oh, please don't be wrong. I'd be so embarrassed. 112.    YASMIN: And dead. Doctor... (The Pting arrives.) 113.    DOCTOR: I'm not bad. Admit it. I'm not bad. It's all in the timing. 114.    MABLI: They, er... they say quarantine scanning and craft detox should take no more than three hours, then they'll admit us to the facility. They're booking your teleport to Seffilun, as soon as you've spoken to the investigators. 115.    DOCTOR: Thank you, Mabli. I'll be sure to tell them how brilliant you were. 116.    MABLI: You all were. Light in dark times. 117.    DOCTOR: People prevail. Hope prevails.

#doctor who #13th doctor #yasmin khan #analysis #chris chibnall

[castle-dominion]

castle 6x16 room 147

the cult hypnosis episode liveblog

(side note I can't believe they didn't have dever & huertas-- heck I would have loved the OTHER dever to do an audio commentary. The castle's dad one had the audio instead which, like, valid ig.) Anyway I'm on a new dvd now, which is why I am complaining about the lack of (my preferred) bonus features.

Not QUITE the same mess lol

KABOOM I loove alexis sm <3 <3

Oof I'm quitting my job to go to school I can't imagine having a job & a non-job & a tutoring gig & paying a lease & holy crap I am so privileged

Yay calling him Sito.

were not was

Jane: He didn’t have to. Good looking guy, no bags, checking in for one night?

that's a flip phone... Plenty of people have their own website. too bad the guy doesn't have imbd tho

random lady yelling.

Love esposito's outfit! so chill!

You never get a confession this early in an ep. u KNOW smth's going to go down. Is there going to be another one really fast like this where they solve it hella fast & after the third murder with an instant confession they get suspicious?

Ah she has an alibi! Is she confessing to cover for someone else?

Love the doodle. Maybe it was a code to whoever is going to read her confession I love the flashbacks. While I'm here, the door opened on the left, attached on the right. I don't think it was like that in the crime scene. wdym you don't think so?

someone is making her confess to their crime that's why this stuff is happening.

Yeah that's how addiction is alright.

I loooove how she doesn't remember! Anita Miller: No, from me!

RC: What about forensics? Did CSU come up with anything? JE: Yeah, a hotel room in New York City? (he shudders) They found all kinds of fun stuff. (not clipping)

Clipping the theory part. unless there was a tall/cext to the phone you don't have!

Doc holloway's back!!!!

Ryan & me: Two weeks? Wait a minute, that’s how long Anita says she’s been feeling blurry.

RC: As much as I love a good mystery, a small part is hoping he can give us some clarity on what the hell is going on.

idk why I find the "ask for help" poster with the guy crying in their hands so humerous. Maybe bc it reminds me of the cotton eyed joe meme I made. Me: *just commit autosurgery trying to cut off my own breast* My surgical tape: *won't stick* Me: *crying* my adhd: IF IT WEREN'T FOR COTTON EYED JOE I'D BE MARRIED A LONG TIME AGO

Love background artists.

I need details.

I love love love the way it goes with the filming. POV filming. (markiplier moments, girl hand, man hand, we also need a black guy. Like that aone scene where you have three hands at some point bc you're picking up the artifact, swapping the teddy bear, holding his nose so he doesn't sneeze, & every single movement is a different person's hand. for Diversity. We need a left-handed person now tho.

Because he did what to you? aiy dee kay. Love the music sm KB, explaining like bonvolio: Yeah, you and Anita Miller are working together on this. You’re either covering for each other or you’re covering for someone else out there.

love how there are two interrogation rooms. She's very adamant that she did this. Why not take the out? "So I didn't kill him? I'm hella confused after all..."

Get doc holloway back here. RC: What if their lives intersect, just not in such a literal sense? Me, just participating in the fictional canadian character poll: ramona flowers? powers? renata? Hold on... scott pilgrim dreams is what I'm saying.

RC: (dryly) Really? Alternate universe? That’s how little you think of me? RC in a future episode: *goes to an au where lanie is preggo & rysposito is canon. unless that was just a fanfic i read...)

I love her ring KB: (off is look) I’m sorry, it’s just, you got excited. It’s kind of cute. RC: Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know how I like the weird stuff. Me: SEASON ONE

WHAT'S nothing? on your phone there?

I LOVE this kid, this absolute child. radar oreilly vibes off him, esp with castle's psychic link theoryu.

OUTSTANDING! LOVE THE WORDS! consistency bc of slaughter! "I need to confess!" 'take a number'

"She remembers bc she thought it looked suspicious" that's the only reason someone WOULD remember! & the only reason they'd take a pic.

a big bald man!

It's just a doodle. It is a celtic knot holy trinity sign, no? the van you've been disoriented. How long have you had that symbol in your head? KB: this is important! Dwight: *I killed a guy but fuck ok bestie*

Assertiveness training I love this tranny sm. He needs to get on testosterone.

Sometimes THEY scrub footage, sometimes it's the detectives...

her phone again. what is even going on with that?

I love it. love the way she picks up her jacket, the boys, she's coming back to work this late at night in an hour... I love these folks this family their dynamics their movements & body language I thouht it was jim not alexis. Peter's cafe/bistro

Her face. she is rolling her eyes & I love alexis & I love her bangs & I love alexis & the alexis-kate relationship kjsdflkjkldjfsd It IS pride! Ooh music!!

Love those two cops smiling in the elevator. IT implies that there was a conversation in there that we missed.

Me: native Esposito: also technically native EHI: *kills ppl in their "sweat lodge initiation"*

lmao SO culty he talks so slow. Need to speed this up. good gravy. Ooh I only just noticed her eyeliner. love it.

this place reminds me of japan. Why is he expecting? Oh maybe bc he killed the guy! ooOOooh! SHUT THE DOOR SHUT THE DOOR BY WHICH I MEAN NO DON'T SHUT THE DOOR YOU'RE GOING TO BE TRAPPED THIS IS MY PARANOIA KICKING IN.

Love the art of himself on the walls. Where is that? Sweden? years????

Bauer: I’m struck by the level of your hostility, Detective. It’s not healthy. RC: You know what I’m struck by is your total lack of curiosity as to why a homicide detective is asking about your employee. "little group" THOUSANDS of members across the globe! RC: Wow. That’s – amazing, how you would just know what off the top of your head. Bauer: I make a point of meeting every member of my EHI family. The people you mentioned are not among them. Me: thousands of members & you have met every one sure but u remember every one?

Bauer: *looks to the side offscreen* RC: *looks to the side too* *realizes* *rolls his eyes up* Me: I do the same thing when my brothers are standing behind me irl & annoying me so I whip around to face them...in minecraft

btw what is that glass thing on there?

grande poobah??? his what???

RC: So all three of our confessors have had problems in their lives. Alcoholism, anger management, assertiveness issues, all things that they could have gone to EHI to treat.

that's true! RC: Wipe memories. Think about it. The fogginess, the confusion over the last two weeks? KR: So you’re saying that a glorified self-help group can erase memories? How? Doc H: With drugs.

Me: *seen the s7 premier* Memories actually change all the time. Outstanding! Love the words! KR: Castle, do you have any idea how insane that sounds? I would clip that but meh RC: Just not in person. Me: Not your psychic theory again!

"Ok he did NOT flirt with me" (why does the woman's vers need to be flirty tho? /gen q for EHS or w/e their name was)

Just letting them continue to argue lol

KB: Yes, a genius at annoying me. (not clipping) RC: Yes, a genius at annoying me. KB: (aside) I’m starting to feel the urge.

the door opens the wrong way THE DOOR OPENS THE WRONG WAY THEY MENTIONED IT RIGHT AFTER MEEEE (tho I have seen it too) wait all these rooms have the same painting? srs?

the way ryan says "su'm" instead of something, I looove it. kinda hate it tho.

CSU: Detective, I traced the signal from Bauer’s video conference with Beckett. JE: So where in Stockholm is he? CSU: That’s the thing. The signal was routed through Stockholm, but it looks like it originated from a local IP address. JE: Local, as in Manhattan? CSU: As in inside this building.

Love esposito's giant coats & layers & stuff.

that hand is slim, but pretty masculine. He smiles but idk if it is flirtatious. None of the suspects said that the bathroom door was open. Why do they know his name tho? Two versions, one for women & another for men? You don't have one for left-handed ppl or someone who maybe can't use or doesn't have their right hand, for Black ppl, for any poc, for ppl who are women but don't want to smile flirtatiously with justin, for fat ppl...

Someone from the crew, yeah you do need a bunch more ppl than just justin, the suspects, & the head of ehi.

At least she pronounced her T. Oof the music. it's so good.

Aw dwight never got to confess slkdjfslkdfjl these three have become friends & I love it sm. Friendship forged in a situation like this.

KB: It’s okay, Castle. You know I like the weird ones. Me: YES YES SJDLFSJKDFLSJDKLFJDS THIS IS THE SERIES

KB: (slyly) How do you know what I do to you when you’re sleeping?

Alexis!!!

#mom no look #castle 6x16 #castle 6x16 spoilers #castle 6x16 quote #the cult hypnosis episode

[hazyaltcare]

🦡 canon call time for Badge lesgooooooooooo

The left is me Ryan the right is Dave who I'm mainly lookin for

K so I kin Ryan from the song Ryan and Dave by Rare Americans rite? I... wanna find my Dave, if he even wants to see me ever again. I jus wanna say sorry really. To his face.

Dave, if you see this... I've fallen again.. not as hard as last time but it's still p bad... I kno u tried so damn hard n i feel awful abt it. I miss ur kids, I miss ur wife, I miss u man...

I shower, I eat, I sleep at decent times, I exercise, I indulge myself in hobbies... I hope ur at least happy I'm not spiraling again.. I don know how long I can hold but... there's others who can hold me down if u never want to again. I get it of thts the case I don blame u fam... i... am not ok

I mean I'm fine but... I'm not ykno? Idk how to explain it rlly but... you know what, fuck it. Whoever is out there, Dave, his wife Mary, their twin kinds Staci and Sami, I miss yall... so bad... so damn bad...

I still got that playlist you helped me make Dave, so i can resist a bit better. It still helps so much more than u can know. It's the only thing left of you I've got left.

Idk if my memories are real anymore or if I'm just projecting again... but if you're out there, any of you, please reach out so I can apologize... that's the least I can do after all the shit I put on you all...

Usually Dave would have his hair long and up cause his family always had trouble with growing hair but he also worked

I was taller and thinner, he was shorter and thicker. I was always loud and brash, he was always thoughtful and almost hesitant. I bounced jobs all over for part times or even seasonals, he had a good pay job he'd started in when he was 22 I think?

We grew up on the tail end of "you need a woman and family" so we were both more or less able to be... us. I never liked women like that, not unless it's romantic or platonic, it was men or bust for me, Trans men too. Dave was Bi, hardcore both ways, women and men, Trans people included.

I ended up using He/They/Bark/Fang pronouns, he ended up using just He/They.

His wife Mary was actually a Trans woman, which would explain why she had trouble talking about "woman things" unless it was with me cause... I was a Trans man. We talked about "things" and helped each other a lot. She was great. Not my type, but she's definitely a sister type to me...

The kids, god... born a few seconds apart from each other. They were easy births though, technically Sami is older but Staci acts like an old lady. Sorry, inside joke.

I'm talking too much... sorry... I'll head out. Hope to talk to yall soon, Ferriss family.

---

//canoncall submitted by @muh-wuh-wuh. Hope you find them!

Mod Haze

#submission #canon call #songkin canon call #kincall #rare americans kin #ryan and dave kin #dave kin #ryan kin #mod haze

[spawn510]

{After the accident}

{Chapter 1}

Another week at Hacketts Quarry summer camp, Jacob has gotten over Emma and is focusing more on doing his job then worrying about past flings. Dylan has started thinking about Jacob as more than just a friend and is doing really well at hiding it. ‘Hmm did I leave my camera behind?’ Jacob thought to himself, then he felt a hand on his shoulder and naturally jumped at the feeling. He whips around to see Dylan standing behind him holding his camera “oh shoot sorry dude, I forgot you’re still a bit jumpy after what happened the last time we were here..” Dylan apologises rubbing the back of his neck “oh no no it’s cool man, we’re all still a little jumpy. If I’m being honest I think the kids are taking advantage of our jumpiness” Jacob reassures, the two let out a hefty laugh before deciding to join the others for an end of shift campfire party.

“Sooooo, Jacob, anyone you’ve been thinking about?~” Emma inquires “you haven’t asked me to.. you know.. at all since coming back” Emma adds, Jacob looks up “oh yeah uhh about that, I’ve just decided it’s not really worth it? I mean I can always find someone else for a long term relationship” Jacob answers with a goofy grin on his face. Emma scoffs and rolls her eyes before Kaitlyn interrupts “hey hey hey, we’re here to have fun, not that kind of fun but silly kids fun” Emma sits down looking away from everyone else “wait.. didn’t we do this before… that?” Nick asks with a weary quiver, everyone goes silent looking slightly traumatised Abi jabs Nick in the ribs “ow! I’m just saying” Nick protests rubbing his rib “well you didn’t need to” Abi responds.

“Sooo are we playing good ol’ truth or dare, or are we playing something else?” Dylan asks “I’m cool with truth or dare” Jacob responds “I guess I’m cool with it, I am still upset with what happened last time” Abi adds “ it wasn’t that bad, I liked last time” Emma buts in “so it’s settled! Truth or dare it is” Kaitlyn chimes in “I’ll start” Ryan adds “hmm let’s see… I pick, Abi, Truth or Dare” Ryan asks “Uhmm I’ll go with truth” Abi responds “Hm do you have any ‘embarrassing’ drawings??” Ryan asks, with a stutter of pure disbelief Abi responds “of course not! I mean I’ve thought about it, every artist has but I’ve never gone through with it… I mean unless your talking about drawings of like crushes then yeah I have” Ryan nods and signals for her to go “oh right uhhh Emma! Truth or Dare?” Abi asks “Dare, I wanna do something risky” Emma responds with a smug look on her face “ok, I dare you to…. Smack yourself across the face” Abi replies smiling “ok that’s a bit rude but fine” Emma responds before smacking herself across the face “my turn, Jacob~ Truth or Dare?~” Emma asks flaunting “uhh, I’ll go with truth” Jacob responds feeling somewhat anxious wondering what Emma could’ve planned for a dare “fineeee, are you still obsessed with me?” Emma asks, rolling her eyes “uhh no not really, I’ve decided to focus more on the job and my fitness rather than something that was never going to last” Jacob responds, everyone turns looking shocked “no way, Jacob has gotten over it!” Nick chimes in with a celebratory laugh “I’m proud of you Jacob!” Kaitlyn exclaims laughing a little, Emma scoffs and folds her arms clearly offended being labeled ‘something that was never going to last’ “ok ok ok my turn, Kaitlyn, Truth or Dare?” Jacob asks “Dare, you know I love a good dare” Kaitlyn responds “ok I dare you to climb that tree and jump into the lake” Jacob dares pointing at a large stable tree hanging over a deep part of the lake “on it” Kaitlyn responds jumping up enthusiastically.

#Jaylan #Jacob Custos X Dylan Lenivy #Jacob Custos #Dylan Lenivy #gay people

[renticat]

WIPED OUT!

I am back and forth I think I am going crazy...

I don't wanna let you down, so promise you won't let me drown.

I don't wanna be alone

I don't wanna be in love, no I want to but it seems that people just have many interpretations of love anyway and mine is not considered as I am an ace. Okay another topic for another day.

This blog is so old. Trust me but I wiped out if for several times, and I almost did it again because I feel I change now and I should just erase all my history and start a new.

But I feel little sad as I don't know, there is some people reading it, even maybe they're just couldn't find me back then. Ugh, is so slow typing on this phone, not to mention the risk of losing it all, I mean sometimes my google just crash and then gone all my writing. Yeah I should just write it on note then copy paste it but back then tumblr is never neat either unless you're doing the writing on the website or app, but the app is huge for my old small phone. 😭

See, I try to make paragraph but the gap is like twice big like the gap of me and him now 😔. Fuck what am I talking about? It's my own fault and yeah I need to take shower instead of rambling about this craziness again.

𝙃𝙤𝙬 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙬𝙖𝙮 𝙄 𝙖𝙢 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙞𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪'𝙧𝙚 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙞𝙣𝙨𝙞𝙙𝙚 𝙢𝙮 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙙?

Yeah, you can't but I keep trying to make you understand and somehow it only made you feel sick about me and now I am sad.

Because I am afraid to lose you, while losing itself sometimes is inevitable. Oh yeah English is not my mother tongue so if this notes sounds stupid to you it probably is. I wish my English writing skill is improving so I can just rant as good as my Indonesian (even though in my Indonesian, I tend to jump from ideas to ideas because there's just too much on my mind; feels like I am exploding and yeah I need to chill) . Fuck I can't chill.—please babe take me away from here, yeah but I am stuck and brokie huhu.

As someone said one or two times talking bout your problem is okay but if you keep ruminating it without looking for the real solution, it'll only makes you go crazy. IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT? IS THIS WHO YOU ARE?

Nope, i don't even know who am I, but I know what I want. Yeah and the upper capital it's something new here because back then I have to type manually big letter for each sentence after period. Gosh, and yeah I sometimes not using commas properly because in Indonesian, if there's conjunction that comes after main clause it's actually not needed; well I tend to write in long manners also like I sm someone who born at 60s. Yeah I wish it will be much easier as text is killing me and I am bad texter.

Cause I know you wanna reach me, but I am a bad texter. No kidding this is the lyrics Bad Texter by Ryan Woods and I kinda dig in to this song too much back then in 2021 as I miss someone who doesn't even miss me back. Isn't that always the case of you Ren? yeah yeah. Like right now I am dying.

Dying for love, but knowing new person is another problem and again I feel bad for lying, saying that everything is OK, when I am NOT OK. I should've done that from the beginning. Fuck. Fuck me. Oh yeah is not that I am vulgar, is just is not my language, so I feel less bad. It's alien to me but not in my Javanese, i don't do that often so I AM SO SORRY. I need to tone down on swearing. LOVE. LOVE ME. HAHAJAA

Writing is fun, is like I can think of what I want to say not like speaking. Yeah I am shy at first but when you already know me, you'll gonna be the one who will embarrassed like how the hell I know this person? I don't know it's full of surprises, congratulations it means i trust you. If I don't speak that much to you, we're not that close (we are though in this blog of mine as I said sooo many freaking things).

Maybe it's because I am hiding for too long now I am going crazy. Well I can't also safely publicly stated my situation right now, right here but goddammit I am too naive and honest that I can't lie for goodness sake. I wish I learnt many things from people whom I talked in the internet, how they're so cunning and crafty with their words even though they never meant it. It's amazing, astonishing and breaking my heart at the same time.

Oh, I don't know I tried to make this blog neat but instead the archive page is fading in one words? The color? Yeah it's strange because I have another tumblr (which I don't open it anymore) but it looks okay. Yeah this one is my favorite because it's the first and back then this theme is available now I can't download it anymore— even though I am planning to just make a new one and save myself time to edit all my past nonsense but I am too old for this. Not tech savvy. 70 years old what do you expect? Hahaha

Old as hell. In this crazy world full of Instagram. I have it back then but then I am bored because I can't afford new outfit or going to cool places. Like people only post their highlight of life and not misery unless it's in form of art that I wish I could draw it out.

Sometimes is like what I am trying to say with all of this things but because in reality I have no spot to be heard as I am already wrong by default it hurts. And I know I don't own explanation to anyone but then I thought love is sharing about everything but then maybe i am mistaken their lust for love.

#Love #wiped out #Mistaken

[ashleyvbaird]

Refined Podcast Script

After submitting my Work in Progress assignment, I continued on my podcast script, adding and refining details of it. I am now happy with what I have in terms of content and am ready to record. I am going to record the entire podcast over, scrapping the first 2 and half minutes I submitted as my Work in Progress, due to the fact I had Covid when recording that and sounded terrible!

I aim to have the podcast recorded next week which should give me ample time to then edit, add music, find a way to host it on Spotify, add my cover art and finish it to a high standard. My only concern is that the podcast may be under 10 minutes, compared to my initial idea that it would be 10-15 minutes, however, I don't want to add things in just for the sake of making it longer. So for now I am happy with my script and don't think I will make any changes, unless it turns out to be extremely short in length.

Below is the another snippet of my script (I would include the entire script but its over 1000 words and you'll hear it soon enough anyway):

And to reiterate how incredibly life changing Narcan can be, I will now share a story that has come out of America about a 16-year-old whose life was saved by Narcan. In September of 2021, Sofia Christoff took a Percocet pill, unaware that it was laced with fentanyl. Her father, Ryan Christoff found her in her bedroom unresponsive and barely breathing. He immediately called 911 and performed chest compressions until help arrived. Body-cam footage shows Sergeant David Cohen entering the home and taking over the chest compressions, asking Sofia’s father if she takes narcotics. To the fathers knowledge she hadn’t, but with the Sergeants experience and his assessment of Sofia’s situation he quickly administered Narcan. Him doing so saved her life. Within seconds her breathing started again and she was taken to a hospital where she was monitored for some hours before being released. Sergeant Cohen was later interviewed, saying that if it's not needed and you use Narcan, there will be no harm caused. But if it is needed and you use it, it's only going to do good. This story of survival is just one of thousands, however, not everyone's story ends as Sofia’s did. Countless individuals lose their lives to Fentanyl, with over 100,000 deaths in the US alone last year, which is why it is so important that 1) we know about Narcan and how it works and 2) we have access to Narcan. Because we can change that number. We can bring the number of deaths down by a myriad. Narcan can change that number. 

That concludes this episode of Dropping the F Bomb, a podcast in partnership with the Be Safe Not Sorry campaign. We hope that you have learnt something from this conversation and that you share this knowledge with those around you. If after all of this information you are still eager to know more be sure to check out besafenotsorry.co.nz, which has a whole lot more info as well as links to helplines. Really it's got every resource you might need so be sure to check that out and we’ll see you next time. 

[angstyaches]

i don’t know if it necessarily calls for a species swap unless ryan and nancy wouldn’t have taken shayne under their wing otherwise (although, i think a species swap would also be very very cool!!). i was thinking more abt the fact that ryan turned elliott and elliott turned felix, and wondering how that could have played out in a more modern setting! ooh, or maybe if the dynamic between shayne and elliott would have changed with shayne being older? i imagine the timeline would be condensed in this au or sharlie are like… middle aged (they do age normally, right?).

Oooh, now I'm imagining just how much better Shayne's teenage years would have been if he'd been taken in and raised by Ryan and Nancy after his parents died, instead of Madelyn and Watson. I feel like he would have grown up to be kind of arrogant, and if I'm being honest, I am here for it. I wonder where he would end up meeting Charlie in this timeline, though.

Ooh, okay, so maybe Elliott and Felix meeting in their late teens/early 20s? Maybe Elliott doesn't know the Elder vampire who turned him and he's just wandering the earth, thinking he'll be alone forever, until he meets this quirky little mint-haired dude in tight jeans and his world is changed forever lol (sorry I'm saying "ooh" a lot, but - ooooh, what if he's part of Madelyn's bloodline in this AU?!)

Shayne and Charlie do age normally, so for this I'd probably picture them as around the same age as the Lucyverse and MARS gangs (late 20s, early 30s).

As for Shayne and Elliott’s relationship (assuming Ryan finds Elliott and decides to take him in), I feel like Shayne would be extremely insecure and jealous of Elliott, being the shiny little vampire protégé he could never be 👀 Maybe he actually really wants Ryan to blood him in this timeline, but she won’t do it because he’s only half human. Maybe he tries to coerce Elliott into changing him. 

Sorry, I feel like I'm overthinking this a lot and it mightn't be exactly what you've got in mind! This is a lot of fun to think about though.

#OC stuff #AU stuff #Swallow the World #StW Shayne #StW Charlie #StW Elliott #StW Felix #ask #anon #StW Shayne Aldridge AU

[johnnymoneymac]

Whats up and NFL Week 5 Recap

What’s up everyone and welcome to the inaugural blog I’m Johnny Mac this hopes to be the first in a long series of blogs regarding sports and other miscellaneous content but I’ll be honest it’ll just end up being about sports because let’s face it football, college hoops, golf make up well over 75% of my personality and brain. I’m an 18-year-old fresh… I’ll stop there nobody gives a fuck about who I am and where I go to school because in the end your here for the analysis and takes jerk off big media outlets like ESPN are too afraid to give. With all that outta the way lets recap the mother fuckin NFL.

TNF Colts 12 - Broncos 9 If u watched the Thursday night game congrats your now blind in your left eye and there’s a decent chance you have some sort of advanced brain cancer… I’m sorry I don’t make the rules. But if your looking for some people to blame start with Russel Wilson and Matt Ryan who bare striking resemblances to every summer church camp director in America. And no that’s not a compliment. The two combined for 58% pass completion and an astounding 0 touchdown and 4 ints which for those who can’t do math that’s a 0/infinity td int ratio. If you’re looking for a spin zone broncos fan well at least Nathaniel Hackett didn’t blow the game with a boneheaded coaching decision so I guess that’s good.

Pats 29 – Lions 0

Disclaimer I am a die-hard Lions fan (please hold off on your sympathetic comments till the end of the blog)

Holy fuck Dan Campbell you’re a great leader the players in that locker room seem to believe in you but Jesus dude you can’t go for it on every fourth down whether it’s your gut on the analytics speaking sometime you gotta punt especially with that atrocious defense Aaron Glenn is commanding - side note – I am speaking to Aaron Glenn exclusively here – Hey dude might wanna start looking at good realtors in the area because unless you pull something outta your ass Brad Holmes is going to literally throw your ass to the curb himself he’s a big dude I’m sure he can. Here’s  an example of a time Campbell kept the offense out there on Sunday. 4th and 1 first drive of the game on his own 45 they called a run play to Williams who got stuffed and gave the pats great field position to start the game. Hey dude maybe idk PUNT THE FUCKING FOOTBALL. And as always Jared Goff fucking blows remember that always remember that. From a Patriots stand point Damien Harris looks like he’s going to be out a while with a hamstring injury but no worries Rhemondre Stevenson can handle the workload fine having over 160 yards on the ground averaging 6.4 yards per carry, Bailey Zappe looks more than capable running the offense till the DUI King Mac Jones comes back.

Giants 27 – Packers 22

Props to Brian Daboll for getting the G-MEN to their last season win total by WEEK 5 that’s some dope shit. Saquon does everything for this team and its awesome having him under center in the wildcat is sick to see after the last few years for him. Packers aren’t the team they’ve been in years past which was demonstrated by them blowing a 10-point lead in the second half.

Also here’s some soft core porn of a giants player getting jerked off during the game https://twitter.com/i/status/1579226487206862848

Titans 21 – Washington 17

 Titans fans relax your back in first place in the division and your team just finds ways to win games further proving Mike Vrabel is an awesome coach. Carson Wentz never fails to disappoint as he threw an interception at the goal line to lose the game in the final minutes of the fourth quarter. This feels like a clean house year for the Commanders its hard to see Rivera returning next year along with upper management and Carson Wentz. By far the most memorable thing from this game is Brian Robinson Jr who got shot twice in the leg 6 weeks ago returning to the field and coming out of the tunnel to Many men by 50 cent overall that’s just some bad ass shit from Brian Robinson.

Bills 38 – Steelers 3

 This got ugly early and kept getting ugly. Josh Allen and the duo of Gabe Davis And Stefon Diggs abused the steelers secondary throughout the whole game. Kenny Pickett threw for over 300 yards which is cool but the steelers look like a bottom 5 team in the league. A little bit of fantasy implications from this game is that Najee Harris is looking like a bust his snap count and touches have went down from last year and the steelers overall inability to do anything on offense is severely hampering him.

Chargers 30 – Browns 28

Brandon Staley could possibly lose this locker room by the end of the year if he keeps going for it like a psychopath for those who didn’t watch the game he went for it on 4th and 2  at around midfield up 2 with under 2 minutes left and didn’t get it effectively setting up the brown with a really good chance to win the game. But the brown were the Browns, and their kicker missed a 51 yarder to win the game. We are starting to see the limits of Jacoby Brissett as he just gift wrapped an int to the chargers near the goal line in the second half. Looking at the Chargers they seem to be setting themselves up for the same result as last year. Going back to Staley I don’t have a problem with him going for it on fourth down as much as he does as that is his brand essentially but hey man a punt doesn’t hurt here and there.

Texans 13 – Jags 6

Dameon Pierce is living up to the preseason hype he looks great and seems to be the focal point of the offense. Texan finally get a tally in the win column and continue their dominance over the jags over the last few years improving to 9-0 in the last 9 meetings between the two. This is a bad loss for an improved Jags team personally I’m pumping the breaks on the jags hype train.

Vikings 29 – Bears 22

Vikings got out to a huge early lead in this one having a 21-3 lead in the second quarter but the Justin Fields lead Bears clawed back into this one having a chance at a game tying drive in the final minutes of the fourth quarter but due to a Ihmir Smith – Marsette fumble which was recovered by the Vikings those hopes of a comeback were squashed but hey Bears fans you covered the spread ( +7.5) and remember good teams win great teams cover.

Buccaneers 21 – Falcons 15

Idk this game happened only big thing to come outta this is the egregious roughing the passer call that could’ve given the falcons the ball late in the fourth setting them up for a game winning drive. I’ll post the clip of the roughing the passer call below

Jets 40 – Dolphins 17

 Teddy “2 gloves “Bridgewater exited this game early and didn’t come back due to a head injury which thrust the 7th round rookie Skylar Thompson into the starting role which severally hindered the dolphins ability to operate on offense. Conversely the Jets looked awesome and that’s 3 wins in a row ever since coach Saleh said he was taking receipts; Zach Wilson is balling out since smoke show model MILF Gisele Bundchen is back on the market… coincidence I think not.

Saints 39 – Seahawks 32

Geno Smith continues to not write back and quite honestly is looking like an upgrade over his predecessor Russel Wilson. The issue is for the seahawks they have one of if not the worst defensive units in football. This game ended up being a shootout which was fun to see on redzone because I don’t really know anyone who would sit down and watch these two teams play right now. Alvin Kamara looked back in form racking up a bunch of scrimmage yards and Taysom Hill reminded us he is one of the weirdest players in the league having 4 total touchdown as a backup QB at this point I’m partially convinced someone is going to give him a contract to be a starter at some point in the next few years. As Berman says “SAINTS GO MARCHING”.

San Fran 37 -  Panther 15

Panthers fans however few of you there are congratu – fucking – lations the Matt Rhule era is over and holy shit was it forgettable between staking his career on the likes of Sam Darnold and Baker Mayfield or winning just 1 game when opponents score more than 17 points this dude sucked ass. This was the loss that put him over the edge, and you have Kyle Shanahan who unlike Rhule is a coaching genius to thank. CMC did get a ton of touches this game and showed out as he generally does glad to see somebody figured it out, but Baker still is terrible, but we won’t be seeing him for a few weeks due to an ankle injury so get ready for the PJ Walker show yes PJ Walker the former XFL player. Niner are rolling and look like by far the best team in the division, but the bye week can’t come fast enough for them as the human highlight reel Deebo Samuel, George Kittle are both banged up.

Cowboys 22 – Rams 10

Cooper Rush continues to win games and cover spreads  almost entirely due to the Cowboys defense who have been balling the fuck out this year and Dak is getting healthy so things are looking up for Jerry Jones’s squad but not so fast Micah Parsons did get banged up in this one and is questionable for the Sunday night game against the eagles in which the winner will take first place in the division, Dak has an outside shot of playing but with the cowboys continuing to win games no reason to doubt Cooper Rush. Taking a sharp 90 here, the rams are fucking awful this was an embarrassing loss for them in which many had them bouncing back after an embarrassing Monday Night Football loss where they didn’t score a td. Simply put they can’t score at all they can’t move the ball Stafford throws 7-yard slants and stick routes to Kupp and Higbee all game which spoiler alert doesn’t fucking work. The embarrassing part of this loss was that they had to use a silent count in their own stadium its not like they’re a god-awful franchise they just won the god damn super bowl and have to use silent counts at home jeez. Everything seems to be spiraling downhill quickly for the super bowl champs

Eagles 20 – Cardinals 17

Eagles remain undefeated due to Matt Amendola lack of competency when it comes to kicking the football which is his profession I may add. Devonta Smith balled out catching 10 balls on 11 targets for 87 yards which shows how deep this eagle’s team is on offense the cardinals took away AJ Brown holding him to a 3-30 stat line and Smith stepped right up like the Heisman winner he is. The eagles defense looked great, and Hurts looked good as well simply put” Its Sunny in Philadelphia”. Cardinals just fell a bit shy in this one but put up a hell of a fight showing that they can be a good team the Hollywood Brown addition is looking like a great one him and Kyler’s college connection hasn’t missed a beat. D- Hop is coming back soon making this talent loaded team more dangerous but they have to start winning games or else it will be another year where Kliff Kingsbury sitting at home in his massive “look at me I’m rich as fuck and good looking” house.

Ravens 17 – Bengals 16

Throwback AFC north battle a true grit and grind game simply put Justin Tucker proves again to be one of the most valuable players in all of football by acing another game winner at this point I’m wondering what will happen if this guy misses a big kick will the universe collapse in on itself? Will the space time continuum break? Will, he melt like the wicked witch of the west? Who knows but it’s not something we have to worry about cause this dude is fucking aces. Lamar led this team to victory though leading them downfield in the final minutes to set up Tuckets field goal. To the Ravens Gm and owners, I do not know your names but pay the man what he wants because without him you are effectively signing up for a 5-12 season. Admittedly I’ve done a 180 on Lamar I used to be a hater, but this dude just slings the rock to Mark Andrews and runs all over the place like prime Vick. I will say though he did miss a couple deep shots down the field to Duvernay but in the grand scheme of things who cares you just beat a division rival in primetime. The Bengals played well too they are getting away from running the ball as much and letting burrow sling it which is what led them to the super bowl last year, I’m still not panicking if I’m a Bengals fan your team will be fine and in the post season do not worry. If you were to worry though Tee Higgins didn’t play past the first few drives due to an ankle injury, he is huge to the offense and is a great deep threat, but Tyler Boyd should step up nonetheless is Higgins were to miss time.

Chiefs 30 Raiders 29

Lot to cover in this game but first this is what primetime football should be two divisional rivals scoring a fuck ton of points in a game that goes down to the wire. Raiders got out to a 17-point lead here and you could just feel that the chiefs weren’t going to stay down even with how much the zebras wanted them too.  Chris Jones was called on a terrible roughing the passer penalty that could’ve very well been a fumble 6 for the big fella and we all love big linemen touchdown just warms our hearts to see. Davante Adams had 2 touchdown and well over 100 yards torching the banged up and inexperienced chiefs secondary. 2 touchdown is normally good enough for a player to lead the stat sheet with but Travis Kelce said hey “ fuck you pal” and had 4 fucking touchdown a career high Mahomes only sees one guy in the red zone and its Kelce who has 7touchdown on the year now. The chiefs offense looked fantastic in the second half firing on all cylinders leading them to a comeback win at home. Down the stretch though Josh McDaniel made a questionable call which ended up costing the raiders the game. He went for 2 to take. A 31-30 lead instead of kicking the extra point to tie it up. This ended up being the difference maker because after the raiders defense got a stop and the offense got the ball back they were forced to score instead of being able to send it to OT. Raiders drop to 1-4 and I do not see them for as bad as their record is they play lots of close games coach McDaniel’s said a few weeks ago that they need to learn how to win, and this game proved just that even though it’s the high-powered chiefs you can’t blow 17 lead points in the NFL. Big game for the Chiefs next week as they welcome the Bills to town in a rematch of the AFC divisional game that was quite simply electric, winner will be crowned top dog in the AFC just give me the over for this game I don’t give a single fuck about what the total is it could be 65 and I would say yep give me the over.

if anyone has made it this long thank you for reading and make sure to check back in I'll be posting week 6 previews and any other shit that catches my eye

#nfl #sports betting #fantasy football

[rere-the-writer]

Title- 'To win her back'

A part two to this request

a part three - ????

Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Protective Mikaelsons

You were surprisingly happy after a good cry when the Mikaelsons left. You thought over Elijah's words wondering if you could truly forgive them. You stood huffing as Ryan rush to your side worry written over his face.

"You okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine I am just tired." You tell him as Ryan smiled softly taking you to bed. Marcel thought it would be a good time to visit you a month after your lovers found you.

"So all that is from them?" Marcel asked taking the cup of tea from you as you sat down looking at the boxes. Since the Originals found you and did as you asked it didn't stop them from sending gifts and things for your baby. Rebekah sent baby clothes, Kol sent toys, Klaus would send paintings he did while Elijah began paying your bills not trusting Ryan to keep you living comfortable.

"Yes. Their way of apologizing, showering me with gifts." You said having not open any of them though you couldn't stop Elijah from paying the bills.

"How is the little guy?"

"Heathly, him and his twin brother." You tell your best friend watching him light up touching your belly smiling.

"Wow twins. That amazing."

"It is....how are they?" You couldn't help but ask as Marcel leaned back thinking how things were back in New Orleans. Things were tense between the Mikaelsons and Hayley as they blamed themselves for you leaving and Hayley was trying to get them to let you go.

"Well they are tensed with Hayley and a little jealous that you let Freya visit." Marcel tells you as you sighed it was true you only allowed Freya to come up to see you so the only way your lovers knew that you were okay was though her and Marcel.

"Tense with Hayley? Why?"

"Well other than blaming themselves for you leaving, they also blame Hayley." Marcel says as you thought over what he said. You knew from what Freya told how they were doing Klaus dosen't really leave his art studio, Rebekah and Kol sleeps in your bedroom and Elijah ignores Hayley spending his time looking though your photo album.

"I see. Well I got a doctor's appointment."

"Right. See you again soon." Marcel said hugging you walking out with you.

"Yeah Mar."

You huffed feeling annoyed seeing dozen red roses on your door and picked the box. You reading the card seeing it was from Kol and you put the roses in a vase while doing so you noticed two empty glasses of wine.

"What the?" You muttered walking seeing pair of women panties that you knew wasn't yours. You realize what was happening as you marched to the the bedroom finding Ryan in bed with his secretary.

"RYAN! Are you fucking kidding me!" You shouted surprising the lawyer and his secretary. You eyes narrowed seeing the gorgeous necklace around the woman's necklace and realized it was one that Rebekah sent as an apology.

"Gifting her my jewelry?!" You shouted at him throwing a picture frame at him as the secretary ylep.

"Baby listen it was an accident."

"An accident?! Get the fuck out of my home and you take my jewelry off!"

"Baby! I'll be out on the street!" Ryan said giving you a puppy dog look as the secretary scrabble to take the jewelry off and got dress. You crossed your arms glaring at Ryan who look pathetic pleading for you to not throw him out.

Elijah was walking down stairs knowing how quiet it was with Klaus up in his art studio, Kol spending all his time with Freya and Rebekah had yet to really leave your bedroom. Hayley came in stopping seeing Elijah and made an attempt to talk to the Original as he had been cold to everyone that wasn't family.

"Elijah, you can't keep ignoring me."

"What do want me to do Hayley? Come running to you? Seek comfort from the one thing that reminds me of the pain I cause to the woman I truly loved?"

"Wow. I hope you say it to her face." Elijah looked up seeing you standing there with a baby sling that held twins. Elijah's breathing hitched finding you just gorgeous dressed in a long sundress hair cut short.

"Y/N?" Elijah whispered finding it hard to believe you were standing there as Rebekah had heard Elijah say your name with Klaus and Kol.

"You guys act like you have seen a ghost." You teased as Rebekah reached you first worried you'll pull away but was glad you let her hug you.

"Are you back for good?"

"I sure hope so because I didn't drive a truck load of stuff for nothing." You said noticing how nervous they were around you as if it was your first night with them all over again.

"You came back to us." Elijah said watching you being lead to the den by Rebekah. They followed after as you frowned noticing the dust on things as you took a good look at your lovers.

Marcel and Freya wasn't kidding when they told you that the others weren't doing well. Each of them looked as if they weren't really feeding, Elijah wasn't dressed in a clean suit, Rebekah looked a bit duller, Klaus looked scruffy with paint on his clothes and Kol was just as dull as Rebekah.

"Well I thought seven months in your mistake was enough." You say sitting down with Rebekah sitting next to you. They looked seeing the twin boys that was asleep.

"So you came back to throw it their faces that you are happier."

"No Hayley. Truthfully I missed you all so I came home it would be unfair to keep Oilver and Henrik from their family." You said as they stared and Elijah swallowed walking over kneeling letting Kol take the other side of you and Klaus stood behind you.

"You named one of our boys after our little brother?"

"Yeah to honor Henrik." You say softly letting them get a better look at the sleeping boys. Hayley crossed her arms staring at you.

"So what hoping to move back in like nothing happened?"

"No. I bought the town house across the street. I forgive them but I am not ready to move back in." You tell Hayley as Oliver woke whining getting your attention. You had Rebekah take a still sleeping Henrik as you fed Oilver.

"How old are they?"

"A month in a half." You answered Kol watching Oliver latch onto you to eat. Elijah was in awe staring at his sons noticed how much Oliver and Henrik looked like him but he was glad they had your nose.

"Baby, as much as we would love for you move back in if there was one thing we learned was. Let you do what you need."

"I am not going to keep the boys from you all unlike some people but I need time before we jump back into this."

"Take all the time you need love. We can wait a thousand years if needed." Klaus says softly rubbing your shoulders. They were happy you let them touch you and was every willing to go as slow as you wanted.

"You want to hold him, Elijah?" You asked when Oilver was done and Kol fix you up. Elijah held his arms out as you placed the wake Oilver in his arms.

"Henrik is smaller than his brother." Rebekah said handing you the sleeping baby as you smiled softly.

"There was a bit of trouble during childbirth. I mean Hen is heathly he'll be fine." You tell them noticing the worry on their faces.

"Are you guys really okay with her just coming back?! After all the pain she put you all in?" Hayley walking in as you stood up getting the twins comfortable in the sling.

"Clearly you guys need to work things out with Hayley. I'll be across the street." You said walking out missing the glares the Mikaelsons gave Hayley. Marcel helped you bring your things inside with Josh and Davina.

"They are cute." Davina said watching over Henrik and Oilver who were wake in baby swings. You smiled opening boxes looking at your boys.

"Yeah they sure got the cute Mikaelson baby genes." You tell Davina as Josh and Marcel brought in the last of the boxes.

"I'm glad you're back. Me and Josh missed you."

"You guys could have visited with Marcel."

"Yeah but someone had to make sure the Mikaelsons take care of themselves."

"Was it really that bad?" You asked looking at them as Davina sighed.

"I am not going to lie to you. Yes it was Y/N, they were a mess. Marcel had to watch over the city."

"Hell they barely let Hayley in the Abattoir unless she was dropping Hope off." Josh tells you as you looked out the window looking across the way staring at the Abattoir.

"Freya never told me how bad it was."

"Because we agreed that you should come back home on your own not because of guilt." Marcel tells you as you looked at them while you were glad that they wanted you to come back on your own. You wished they told you how they really were doing.

Later that evening Klaus stopped by with Elijah and you let them in as they noticed you were in one of Klaus's old shirts and sweatpants.

"Unpacking love?"

"Yeah if you guys didn't send so much I wouldn't be still unpacking." You tease lightly as Klaus smirked while Elijah knelt down in front of the boys. Oliver was reaching for Elijah's hand and he let the boy grab his hand.

"Where is Kol and Rebekah?"

"Getting you dinner." Klaus said moving to help you unpack while Elijah was playing with boys.

"Where is Ryan?"

"Back in New York. Caught him sleeping with his secretary."

"Sorry to hear the love." Klaus says rubbing your back as you chuckled leaning into him.

"It's okay. Ryan wasn't you guys...he didn't have that same warmth."

"We brought food my beautiful righteous Queen." Kol said making you laugh which made the babies laugh. The Mikaelsons were happy to hear your laughter again and this time they were going to do their best to be sure you felt loved as they weren't going to let you go this time.

#rere's stories #mikaelson family x reader #mikaelson family fluff #elijah mikaelson x reader #klaus mikaelson x reader #kol mikaelson x reader #rebekah mikaelson x reader

[bumblesimagines]

Forgotten Fairytale

Part 2

Request: Yes or No

I'm not afraid of this series not becoming as well loved as Green Thumb and I don't expect it to be popular. I've had the idea stuck in my head for a while and I'm getting it all out.

~

You looked over the artifacts the school had stored. You gave a small scoff, shaking your head as you noticed things that didn’t belong in a school.

“They call us thieves and hoarders yet half this shit was stolen off a corpse.” You muttered, stopping in front of a glass case protecting a sword.

“I wouldn’t suggest stealing that. It’ll be obvious.” You turned towards the redhead, sighing and tilting your head as she walked towards you.

“You’re a pain in the ass.” You looked back at the sword, eyes raking over it. 

“You know what this is?” You asked. Hope stood beside you, looking down at the sword. She shook her head, pursing her lips slightly.

“A man named Lord Jameson Wraith owned this sword. He was… a hunter of sorts and specialized in killing dragons. When he stabbed this through the chest of a dragon, the sword would light up and the dragon would burn from the inside. A gruesome, slow death. We were hunted like all others but it wasn’t just to protect humans. We were hunted for our meat, our teeth, and our scales. Humans declared war on us and when we fought back, we were erased from everyone's minds and deemed fairy tales where we continue to be killed by a so-called knight.” You explained, running your finger over the glass. 

“Some dragons were able to survive Malivore but as soon as they shifted… They were taken. They disappeared and left no trace.” You turned to look at Hope. The redhead stayed silent, a frown etched on her face.

“I’m sorry you lost your father. We’re working on finding Malivore and when we do, there’s a chance you’ll be able to see your father again.” Hope said softly, gaze still trained on the sword. 

“Where’s your mother? Alaric mentioned she was a vampire.”

“I was never able to meet her but.. I believe she’s dead.” You walked around the case, looking back up at Hope. You locked eyes with her, hearing her clear her throat.

“I’m sure she would’ve wanted to be in your life.” Hope offered a small smile, nails gently tapping against the case. 

“Are you being nice to me cause you need to find out more about me?” You asked, head tilting. Hope cocked a brow, eyes rolling as she turned away from you.

“Alaric really doesn’t trust me, does he?”

“He trusts you more than I do, that’s for sure. It’s just too much of a coincidence for you, a dragon, to show up when we’re dealing with monster after monster. If it weren’t for Alaric, I would’ve already done a spell on you.” Hope said as she walked around the room, features hard and serious. 

“A little witch spell wouldn’t work on me. You haven’t been trained to deal with dragons. If I was really one of those monsters, why didn’t I burn the building down and search for whatever it is that you have?” You asked curiously. Hope didn’t answer, thinking for a moment.

“Because you’d need to know if it was hidden.”

“Alaric asked if I felt a pull to this place. I suppose that means I would feel a pull towards the artifact, right?” You slowly walked towards her, a soft chuckle leaving you.

“You can kick and scream all you want, Red. I’m here to stay, whether you like it or not.” You reached out, twirling a strand of her red hair around your finger. Hope grabbed your wrist, pushing your hand away.

“You’re up to something and I’m gonna figure out what it is.” Hope sneered, eyes narrowed. She turned around, walking towards the doors. She almost bumped into a man on her way out, quietly apologizing before moving past him. The man entered the room, clasping his hands together. 

“I’m Dorian Williams, the liberian and occasional substitute teacher.” Dorian introduced himself, finding a table and taking a seat. He motioned for you to sit across from him. You did so, taking a seat and crossing your arms as you eyed him.

“I’m gonna be honest with you, (Y/N). I do have some suspicions that you might be after the artifact but.. You’re a kid. A kid who lost their father and wants answers. I’m not here to interrogate you about your intentions.” Dorian explained, leaning back in his seat with his arms crossed. 

“Do the other students know what I am?” 

“News spread like wildfire here, especially amongst the students so.. Yes, most likely. I can assure you that you’ll be treated like any other student-”

“So, Hope goes around telling every student she’s gonna figure out what they’re up to? No wonder she’s not popular.” Dorian let out a small laugh, shaking his head.

“I promise Hope isn’t always like that. The monster problem we’ve been having has everyone on edge. Do.. Do you know anything about Malivore?” Dorian asked, sitting up and leaning forward. 

“I thought you weren’t gonna interrogate me.” You tilted your head, brow cocked. Dorian hummed softly, nodding. 

“Alright, we can talk about something else. The neck is a dragon's soft spot, right?”

“Depends.” You answered, licking your lips as you reached up to touch your necklace. 

“If a dragon is older and stronger, a hit to the neck isn’t gonna hurt them much. It might piss them off and they could lose their ability to speak or even stop them from breathing fire cause it’ll hurt to do so. We can still kill someone by stepping on them or snacking on them. We were on the top of the fucking food chain and humans just couldn’t deal with that.” 

“I’m not your enemy, (Y/N). I want to believe I can trust you. You’re a child and like all children, you need guidance. I see a lot of rage built up inside you. I can tell from the way you interacted with Hope and from what I heard. Landon and Rafael aren’t your enemies. They’re new and they have a rough past. The first dragon they met wanted to burn them into a pile of ashes so.. I’d say they’re being pretty welcoming.” Dorian held a soft yet stern gaze. It was obvious that he sympathized with you but at the same time, he wasn’t gonna deal with an attitude.

“Tell me about your father. What was he like?” Dorian asked softly. Your gaze dropped to the table, fingers squeezing around the key. 

“I’d appreciate it if everyone could stop talking about him as if he’s dead.” You breathed out, standing up abruptly as your eyes began to sting from tears.

“I don’t need to be welcomed into this school. I’ve been to high school before, I’m not some little kid whose hand needs to be held.” You walked out of the room, heading back to your dorm room. You entered the dorm, shutting the door behind you. You sniffled softly, walking towards the window and opening it. You stepped out, taking a seat on the roof. You brought your knees up to your chest, feeling the wind gently hitting your face. 

“The key to food is passion, remember that (Y/N).”

“I thought it was seasoning.” You grinned as you watched your father cook. He hummed, nodding with a chuckle.

“It is but food from a chef who feels no passion for it will taste bland and bitter. It’s the same with any other job. If you hate it, it’ll show and you’ll only hurt yourself. That’s why I always tell you to look for things you’re interested in.” (F/N) said, handing you a wooden spoon so you could help with stirring the soup.

“What was mom passionate about?”

“Your mother was.. She was a hurricane.” He began, sighing deeply. “She destroyed everything in her path and took down anyone in her way. Not many people have fond memories of her but I saw the good in her. I didn’t love her romantically but I considered her a good friend of mine. I’ll always be grateful to her for giving me the best gift a man could ever have.” You smiled widely, chuckling softly and rolling your eyes. (F/N) smiled softly, leaning over and pressing a kiss to your temple.

“No treasure could ever compare to you.” 

You bit your bottom lip, letting out a shaky sigh. You weren't used to being alone. Your father had always been there to back you up, to support you, and to provide comfort when you needed it.

“Christ, pull yourself together. You come from dragons and a psycho vampire.” You mumbled, carefully going back inside. You picked up the phone, turning it on and waiting for it to power on completely. You responded to a text, watching a call pop up. You clicked the green button and held the phone up to your ear.

“I thought you said it was stupid to be in contact.” You took a seat on the bed.

“Yeah, well, I was expecting you to be back by now. You do know your fathers return lies in your hands, right? Only I can help you get him back but I’ll only do that if you give me what I need.”

“I have a plan-”

“Speed up that plan before I change my mind, (Y/N). While you were on your way to the school, I bumped into some of your new friends. They were a redhead and an older man. I believe the girl went by the name Jessica but I doubt it was her real name.” You let out a deep sigh, head tilting upwards. Hope Mikaelson was gonna be a real pain in the ass.

“Yeah, I’ve met the redhead.” You breathed out, dropping your head and pinching the bridge of your nose. 

“I just need you to relax, Ryan. I’ve got it handled but I really don’t need you fucking things up for me. You just keep up your end of the deal and I’ll keep up mine. You might be able to save my father but I can also keep you from helping yours.”

“Is that a threat?”

“It’s a fact. Don’t bother me again unless it’s an emergency.” You pulled the phone away from your ear despite Ryan continuing to talk. You hung up and tossed the phone to the side, burying your face in your hands. 

“Am I paying for my mothers crimes?” You whispered. You flinched when you heard two knocks on the door, standing up and approaching it. You opened the door, staring at Josie.

“What do you want, baby face?” You asked with a frown, looking down at the ice cream tub in her hands. Josie’s brows furrowed at the nickname but she ignored it, choosing to raise the tub. 

“I.. I kind of eavesdropped on you and Dorian and saw you rush out. Ice cream always makes me feel better when I’m feeling down, so I brought you some.” Josie shrugged lightly. You blinked, opening your mouth but nothing came out. 

“If you don’t like ice cream then I could see if-”

“Thanks.” You cut her off, watching her relax and give a small smile. Josie nodded, perking up when you stepped aside so she could enter. Josie looked around the room, humming. 

“If you want, we could go shopping for some decorations tomorrow after school.” Josie said, moving one hand under her skirt as she sat down. You nodded, taking a seat beside her and subtly turning the phone off. Josie opened the lid of the tub, handing you a spoon and giving a small shy smile.

“Well, Welcome to Salvatore School. I’m pretty sure dad is still figuring out your class schedule.” 

“Dad?”

“Oh, uhm, the headmaster is my dad.” Josie shrugged, digging her spoon into the ice cream. Your brows raised, a small smile spreading across your face. 

“Really? You look nothing like him.. Which is a big compliment.” You grinned as Josie let out a soft giggle. Things were definitely starting to look up.

#x reader #x you #x y/n #x male reader #x male!reader #legacies x reader #legacies x you #legacies #legacies x y/n #legacies x male reader #hope mikaelson #josie saltzman #lizzie saltzman #milton greasley #alaric saltzman #landon kirby #rafael waithe

[blacktofade]

Hi!! for the prompt thing!! ryan getting so caught up with other things that he doesn’t realize shane is slowly slipping away ?? im really into angst with happy ending or hurt/comfort bc im a cotton candy that cant handle too much angst but it’s really up to u!! ☺️☺️☺️

Boy am I late with this one. This isn't even what you wanted, because I like Ryan calling Shane out on his shit.

CW: smoking. Also, pandemic? What pandemic?

*

Shane’s leaning against a retaining wall in the parking lot when Ryan eventually comes to find him. He takes another drag of his cigarette and watches as Ryan steps out of the building, tucking his hands into the pocket of his hoodie and drawing his shoulders in against the cold as he glances around, clearly knowing Shane is nearby, but not knowing where.

When he spots Shane, his expression opens, a smile spreading across his face.

Shane tips his head in acknowledgment, turning slightly to the left to exhale a breath that’s a mix of smoke and condensation.

“Hey,” Ryan says, when he’s close enough. “Thought I’d find you out here.”

Shane knocks ash off the end of his cigarette and offers him a smile. “Needed a break.”

Ryan lets out a quiet laugh. “What, you don’t like the office packed with thirty more people than it can reasonably fit?”

Shane snorts. “You said the more the merrier when we planned this winter party.”

“I think I underestimated things,” Ryan says, his shoulders seeming to loosen, and Shane shrugs.

“I dunno. It seems fitting for our first year.”

Ryan laughs again and nods. “It’s been — chaotic.”

“Understatement,” Shane grunts.

“We did okay, I think,” Ryan tells him, or perhaps tells himself, and Shane grunts again. Ryan lets out a huff of laughter. “What? You’d do something differently if you redid this year?”

“Sounds like a topic for Steven’s next employee survey,” Shane jokes, but Ryan keeps watching him, as though waiting for an answer.

“But would you have changed anything?”

Shane hesitates. “Seems like a loaded question.”

Ryan doesn’t say anything and Shane takes another drag of his cigarette and exhales away from him to be polite.

“You okay?” Shane asks after a moment, because it seems like the right thing to do.

Ryan still doesn’t say anything, but instead holds out his hand, silently requesting Shane’s cigarette.

It’s not a good sign.

The last time Ryan had smoked in front of Shane had been over one too many drinks after contract negotiations with BuzzFeed. Ryan’s hands had been shaking too much to light the cigarette and Shane had needed to do it for him.

Ryan takes a draw, coughing almost immediately and making Shane laugh before he can help himself.

“Smoking’s bad for you,” Shane deadpans and Ryan doesn’t react, but touches a thumb to the corner of his own mouth as though thinking.

He takes another drag, not coughing this time.

“Do you ever feel like you have to choose between things?” Ryan asks, taking Shane off guard.

“Like red or white wine?” Shane tries to joke, but it doesn’t land and Ryan silently passes his cigarette back.

“No, between work and life.”

Shane scratches at his stubble and taps away a little more ash. “If you’re having issues with work-life balance, you should tell Steven.”

Ryan lets out a laugh that sounds slightly self-deprecating. “No, that’s not — that’s not what I mean.”

“Well, I can’t read minds, Ryan.”

Shane takes one last drag of his cigarette and stubs it out against the concrete wall behind, exhaling while Ryan seems to think about what it is he’s trying to say. Carefully, Shane wets his fingers on his tongue and pinches at the end of the cigarette until it’s cool enough to slip back into the packaging to throw away later, and puts the carton in his pocket.

“It's been a really good year,” Ryan finally says after a long moment, though Shane can hear the but in his voice. "But it feels like you’re avoiding me.”

Shane’s stomach sinks. “Avoiding you?”

“When was the last time we did anything outside of work?”

Shane wants another cigarette already, just for something to do with his hands. Instead, he tucks them into the pockets of his chinos.

He doesn’t answer Ryan, but only because he can’t remember the last time.

“You barely even text me unless it’s work related,” Ryan presses.

Shane knows what he’s talking about. He won’t deny that. But it doesn’t make it easier.

“It’s a startup,” Shane tries. “We’re gonna be busy for a while.”

“Shane, don’t bullshit me.”

Shane takes his advice and shuts his mouth.

“Are you avoiding me?” Ryan presses and Shane lets out a sigh.

“If we spend all day working together and hang out after, you’ll get sick of me.”

Ryan watches him and Shane knows he has his answer.

“This is literally no different from what we had before at BuzzFeed,” Ryan points out and Shane shakes his head.

“This is legally binding now.”

Ryan laughs like he thinks Shane is the most ridiculous person ever, which he probably does. “You say that like we got married.”

“We did a little bit.”

“If I have to call you my work husband, I’m going to quit,” Ryan threatens and Shane lets out an unexpected laugh, knowing how much they both hate buzzwords like that.

“Please don’t.”

The silence hangs between them for a moment before Ryan finally asks, “Don’t call you that, or don’t quit?”

“Either,” Shane admits. “Both.”

There’s another long silence before Ryan finally says, “I’m not gonna grow bored of you.”

“I didn’t think you would,” Shane replies with a frown.

“So you just avoided me for other, completely rational reasons?”

That shuts Shane up.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Ryan asks, though Shane knows they both already know the answer to that.

“No,” he says, just to clarify.

“Do you want to try using your words like an adult?”

Shane hates that Ryan’s actually in-tune with his feelings. He sighs and shrugs loosely. “There’s more at stake. If we fight — ”

“If we fight, we’ll talk it out like friends and business partners. Or would you prefer we have blowout arguments that ruin both our friendship and our business?”

Shane sighs again, because he knows Ryan is right. Ryan raises his eyebrows like he knows Shane knows he’s right.

“I’m sorry,” Shane apologizes, and realizes after he says it that he actually means it. He’s hated not spending extra time with Ryan, but he’s hated the fear of accidentally losing Ryan even more.

Ryan’s shoulders drop like he’s finally relaxing and he smiles, the blinding smile that he always has for Shane, no matter his mood.

“I wish we’d talked about this sooner,” he admits, “but I could never get you alone.”

Shane rubs the back of his neck and nods. “Yeah, that took some effort. I’m not proud.”

Ryan shakes his head, like he can’t believe the lengths Shane goes to, but he’s still smiling, which gives Shane hope that he hasn’t fucked everything up completely.

“Will you grab dinner with me after work next week?” Ryan asks gently.

There’s a familiar clench in Shane’s stomach — instinctive at this point from trying so hard to avoid everything — but he takes a breath and nods before he can give himself time to back out.

“Yeah,” he says. “We can do that.”

Somehow, Ryan’s smile brightens even more.

“C’mon,” he says, “let’s go back inside before anyone misses us.”

He tugs on Shane’s sleeve, but he doesn’t have to tug hard. Shane follows him willingly.

#thing wot i wrote #prompts 2021 #fic #preslash #shyan #lovely anon

[thanatophobia-thoughts]

Tell my nephew I am sorry. Tell my sister I’m sorry she had to be the one to tell my nephew. Tell her I was afraid of her judgement. Tell my mother I wasn’t bluffing. Tell my brothers I was going back to get the brother who didn’t survive, the one before me. Tell them that this was my apology to him. Tell my grandmother to please open up the gates, I know this really wasn’t the way she expected to see me again, but this is how I am unraveled. Tell her… never mind, I’ll tell her myself. 

Tell my other suicide notes they asses weren’t poems either. Tell my roommate I’m sorry he had to be the one to find the body. Tell the blood, “be quick about it already!” Tell Ryan, my love, that everything has his name on it. Tell the man that threatened my life, I won, too slow in this human’s race. Tell the downstairs neighbors I’m sorry for the blood. Tell Aerys I’m sorry I couldn’t be the best man in her wedding. Tell Duran he was right, one day I would. Tell Jeffery I imagined it was him pulling the trigger. Don’t tell my little brother - don’t tell Rashad unless he asks. Please. 

Tell my father, “if we make it to the same place, could you at least try to talk to me first this time?” Tell depression, “good game! I almost had you, motherfucker!” Tell the psychiatrist the medicine ain’t workin’. Tell the floor it was a beautiful final bed, a last pair of arms, a wooden womb of an exit. Tell my feet, “stop running.” Tell my body, “keep the pills down.” The volume in my stomach is coming up - tell the volume, “quiet; don’t moan.”

Tell the pain I said goodbye. Tell goodbye I said hello. Tell Jessica, “I know - don’t follow me.” Tell Mobile Crisis Cleveland they are a sorry bunch of entitled assholes. Tell my ex-boyfriends to whisper my name. Now they know the sound of a dodged bullet. Tell the police I always leave the door unlocked. Tell them I won’t bother them again. Tell them I’m fine, I don’t need to go, I… I get to take what’s mine - handcuffs. Tell the ER it looks like temporary. Tell the ER I’m gonna rename in my father’s presence. Tell Mother Nurse, don’t smile and hold my hand, don’t look like my mother, don’t tell me I can heal, don’t lie to me now, don’t give me stories to read, don’t name our laughter, my nephew’s smile. Don’t you show me what I got to live for, don’t make me want this again, please don’t make me fight. I’m tired, and no, I don’t want it to be better! Better is only a father’s presence. Don’t wash off the scabs, don’t fix the brokenness that is all that I know.

Tell Renee, tell Nurse Renee… 

Tell Renee I said thanks. Tell her I said thank you. Tell my nephew… tell them all I said thank you. Tell God I said, “send another one, every day”. Tell chocolate I said thank you. Tell Greek yogurt I’m back. Tell them I am home. Tell them I’m home, home is here, no matter what the shatter or the clatter I am here. I am Miss Celie here, I am so present!

Tell God, whoever he, or she, or they are, thanks, but next time, I won’t be seein’ ‘em soon.   

#suicide note #tw suicide #akeemjamal rollins #suicide poem #suicide poetry #my heart is in pain still #and this helps