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endless-season · 1 year

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5th Anniversary Livestream - Puppet Skit

You can watch the livestream recording here!

The Puppet skit is around 1:05:00 - 1:23:00

Host: Good evening everybody and welcome to Kitchen Battle! Tonight is the anniversary of Loveland TV and also the 5th anniversary special edition of Kitchen Battle! And so, today we’ve invited five popular guests to our studio to join us in celebrating the 5th anniversary and also cook us up a surprise!

Host: Without further ado, please welcome our guests, the Outstanding Talents of Loveland City

Host: The Expert Food Critic – Kiro!

Kiro: My food judging skills are as good as my singing!

Kiro: Although last time when I was on a gourmet food variety show there were some… minor accidents… Tonight I’ll definitely show everyone my true cooking skills!

Host: *nervous laugh* Ok!

Host (away from mic): Could all staff please ensure that Kiro stays away from any open flames and knives to ensure safety and avoid any risks to the studio.

Host: Please welcome our next guest - Taste Adventurer, Gavin!

Gavin: I’ll create impossible dishes out of readymade ingredients.

Gavin: No matter what happens next, I’ll accomplish this mission without a hitch.

Host: We’re just cooking, no need to be so tense… In any case, Officer Gavin please take your place.

Host: Please welcome our next guest – The Greatest Cookbook, Lucien!

Lucien: I’ve already spent 3 days 8 hours and 21 minutes memorizing all the recipes online.

Lucien: By researching and analysing the experiences of our predecessors and their unique recipes, we can quickly master the secrets of the kitchen.

Host: It seems Professor Lucien’s already done some theoretical work before coming to the studio! Thanks for coming Professor Lucien.

Host: Please welcome our next guest – The Ultimate Chef, Victor!

Victor: I won’t let these ingredient down.

Victor: Chef? This particular title should not be one used in a general setting. My assistant will be contacting you later to investigate the source of this information.

Host: Uh... ok Mr Victor.

Host: Please welcome our final guest - Food Tyrant, Shaw!

Shaw: Yo boss, get me one of everything on the menu to try.

Shaw: Hurry up already, I’m hungry from all this waiting.

Host: Ok! All five of our guests are here! Welcome all!

Host: First, if you could all introduce yourselves.

Kiro: Hello everyone! I’m Kiro, a well-known foodie of Loveland. Tonight I’ll definitely bring you all an incomparably delicious dish!

Gavin: I’m Gavin. I don’t usually cook, but I’ll try my best tonight.

Lucien: Hello, I’m Lucien. I believe facing an unfamiliar cuisine is just like facing an experiment with unknown results. Looking forward to a pleasant surprise.

Victor: I’m Victor. I’m sure everyone can look forward to a good dish.

Shaw: Me? Shaw. Can’t cook, gonna wing it tonight.

Host: Thank you all for coming tonight. Before we start with tonight’s special recipe, I have a few questions for everyone.

Host: Does anyone have any memorable cooking experiences to share? Or any expectations for tonight’s recipe.

Lucien: I don’t have much cooking experience, but each time is different. I trust tonight will also be a valuable experience.

Gavin: I trained a bit before coming here so my cooking skills may have improved. We’ll see how it goes later.

Kiro: I have a lot of memorable experiences tasting food! I hope to invent some never before seen food, like spicy donuts~

Victor: I have decent cooking experience. I guess you could say enough to be proficient. But of course, it would be nice to experience something new tonight.

Shaw: Hurry up and start already. Just make something I like eating.

Host: I’m sure our audience is all curious what our special 5th anniversary recipe is. But hold your horses, cooking isn’t that easy!

Host: Let’s start off with a small game, only after clearing it can you get all the ingredients needed!

Host: Please turn your attention to the screen.

Host: Warm Up Game! Ingredients Battle, you draw, I guess. Each game is divided into 5 rounds. The guests take turns to each draw the given prompt within 10 seconds and the other 4 guests try to guess the answer based on their drawing. Just a reminder, the prompts given are the ingredients needed for the secret recipe so try your best!

Kiro: This game’s easy! I’ll go first!

Host: Kiro is intensely drawing, what kind of artwork will he bring?

Kiro: I’m done drawing! Tada! Super easy to guess!

Shaw: I can’t tell what it is.

Victor: If it’s an ingredient… maybe flour?

Gavin: Is it sesame seeds?

Lucien: Perhaps some form of seasoning like sugar or salt…

Correct Answer! Sugar

Kiro: Correct! As expected of Professor Lucien!

Lucien: Mm, the drawing is actually quite good, there’s an indescribable beauty about it.

Host: The first round was successfully passed, let’s continue with round two! Student Shaw, please take a look.

Shaw: Oh, my turn? Heh. Time for you have a look at my artistic skill. *humming while drawing*

Host: Student Shaw looks brimming with confidence, looking forward to see his work.

Shaw: Ok everyone, look over here. Look carefully, next is the important part. *humming while erasing*

Shaw: How is it? Easy yeah?

Victor: … Did he look at the wrong word?

Gavin: Is this some kind of performative art.

Lucien: Is it... chives?

Kiro: emmmm… I know! It’s strawberry! Hahahahah

Correct Answer! Strawberry! (T/N: Strawberry = lit. Grass + Gone)

Shaw: Not bad, pretty smart.

Kiro: Heh, as expected of me.

Lucien: Quite a creative way to communicate the prompt.

Gavin: It does make sense.

Victor: … a childish performance.

Host: Congratulations on another correct answer! Next, could we get Professor Lucien.

Lucien: Guess it’s my turn.

Lucien: Sorry to make a fool of myself, time is limited so the drawing isn’t that great.

Kiro: Isn’t this a bit toooooooo refined. I’m guessing an egg? A duck’s egg? A quail egg!

Victor: Undoubtedly an egg.

Gavin: Agreed

Host: Student Shaw, how about your answer?

Shaw: … surely it can’t just be an egg, is there a catch.

Correct Answer! Egg!

Lucien: Too much caution can cause people to deviate from the correct answer.

Host: That’s right, it’s that easy! Let’s continue with the next round.

Gavin: I’ll go next.

Host: Officer Gavin is concentrating very hard, I trust it’ll be an amazing work.

Gavin: Um, I guess just like this.

Kiro: Oh I know - Ice cream!

Lucien: Maybe mashed potato?

Shaw: Meat bun? Pork soup dumpling? Or is it crab dumpling? Tch, can’t tell.

Victor: Looks like a bowl of rice.

Gavin: … Everyone keep trying. Hint, it’s something sweet that makes people happy when they eat it.

Victor: … Cream?

Correct Answer! Cream!

Kiro: How did you guess that!

Victor: Got lucky…

Lucien: There is some resemblance.

Host: Next is Mr Victor, looking forward to his performance.

Victor: I will try my best.

Kiro: Ah, it looks delicious. It’s chocolate chip cookies…

Gavin: Shouldn’t it be beef?

Lucien: I think it should be milk. The cookies are just a side.

Shaw: It’s clearly this cows afternoon tea.

Kiro: Huh…? Do cows drink milk for afternoon tea?

Shaw: Who said it had to be milk inside the glass.

Victor: Hm?

Lucien: Sometimes the truth nature of things is unexpectedly simple. No need for everyone to think too deeply. I think the answer is indeed milk.

Host: Well then, let’s see, is our last answer indeed milk?

Correct Answer! Milk!

Kiro: Sure enough, it was the simple answer.

Host: Congratulations everyone! Sugar, strawberry, egg, cream, milk. All ingredients successfully obtained~

Host: On to our next segment. Our kitchen battle officially begins!

Host: Ingredients are in place, is everyone ready?

Kiro: Now that I think about it, this is my first time wearing an apron on camera.

Lucien: Congratulations on unlocking another life achievement.

Gavin: Erm… these aprons… *ahem* are a bit too cute.

Victor: Indeed. Compared to making a cake, this seems to be the greater challenge.

Kiro: Hey, someone’s trying to avoid it.

Shaw: *sighs* Okay, okay.

Host: Okay, since everyone is ready, I’ll announce the aim of today’s challenge! Today our five guests will be making anniversary cake! Well then, let’s hand over to our guests!

Victor: Let’s divide up the work.

Kiro: Ok.

Gavin: Understood.

Lucien: No objections.

Shaw: I learn fast, anything is fine.

Victor: We’ll split into pairs. I’ll help out both sides. If there’s any problems, you can find me.

Shaw: *peaces out*

Kiro: Aw yeah! I’m going to make the best cake in the world.

Gavin: I’m going to do some warm up exercises on the side first.

Victor: *sighs* … so be it.

Lucien: I’ll check we have all the ingredients we need.

~ On Lucien and Shaw’s side ~

Lucien: 3 eggs… 180g… so each egg should be 60g…

Shaw: You still haven’t finished choosing the eggs?

Lucien: But the scale says…

*A wild Victor emerges*

Shaw: Ahhh close enough.

Victor: Hm... actually-

Lucien: Sugar? If I’m remembering correctly… we only need 60g?

*Victor peaces out*

Lucien: It’s better to follow the ratio of the recipe to better guarantee the accurate result.

Lucien: Perfect, 60g on the dot. Hm… next is…

*A wild Kiro appears*

Kiro: Wow! I’ve discovered that milk plus lemon juice plus sugar tastes really good! I highly recommend this Kiro Original recipe to everyone!

Shaw: What are you having?

Kiro: An original mix, wanna try some?

Shaw: Lemme try. *drinks* Ah, not bad.

*A wild Victor appears*

Victor: What are you guys doing?

Shaw & Kiro : Ahhhhh

*Shaw gets back to cooking, Kiro escapes into the sunset*

Victor: This smell…

Lucien: I’ve separated the egg white and egg yolk. I’ll leave the rest to you, student Shaw. I’m sure you’ll do well.

Shaw: No worries!

Lucien: First you stir clockwise 120 times, then you stir anticlockwise 150 times.

*A wild Victor emerges*

Lucien: Then add milk and butter, and stir clockwise and anticlockwise 180 times each.

Shaw: Hmm… so first, clockwise 120 times…

Shaw (in the bg): 101... 102... 103… 104…

Victor (whispering to Lucien): I don’t recall these steps in the recipe. Also the program staff prepared an electric mixer.

Shaw (in the bg): 105… 107… 108… 110… 115…

Lucien (whispering back): University students are always very energetic.

pls appreciate this beautiful fanart

~ On Kiro and Gavin’s side ~

Gavin: Let me see… the next step… add a suitable amount of cocoa powder and some crushed biscuits…

Gavin: … Suitable amount? What’s a suitable amount? Some? How many is some?

Kiro: Urgh… the most annoying recipe instructions have appeared.

Gavin: Then… I’ll just go with gut feel…

Gavin: *AGGRESSIVE GRUNTING AND SHAKING*

Gavin: *gasp* Oh no.

Kiro: Uh… no worries Officer Gavin, we’ll just start over.

Kiro: Here *passes egg*

Gavin: Thanks

Kiro: Here

Gavin: Thanks

Kiro: Here

Gavin: Thanks

*A wild Victor emerges*

Victor: How are you guys going?

Gavin: It should be… okay.

Victor: Why does it look like there’s eggshells in the cake… let me see.

Victor: You don’t have any more eggs!?

Kiro: Gavin’s already-

Gavin: *Ahem* So, can we move on to the next step?

Kiro: Right, yes, so next is putting on the cream.

Gavin: I’ll do it.

Kiro: Go go you can do it!

Victor: Don’t be nervous. This part is easy.

Kiro: Ah!

Gavin: Um. Did I put too much cream?

Victor: Pause time and immediately finish the entire thing… feasibility is… … *sighs*

Host: The cake base for all the 5 guests is already complete, next up is time for their individual decorations. What kind of cake will they make? Let’s have a look.

Host: Hm. We see Kiro here with a lot of chips… what kind of cake are you planning to make?

Kiro (stuffing his face with chips): Wait, no looking. This is my original recipe and cannot be leaked.

Host: Uh, I’m sure it’ll be a great cake.

Host: Well then, let’s have a look at our next guest.

Host: Officer Gavin seems to be deep in contemplation.

Host: Officer Gavin, could you share with us your ideas for the cake?

Gavin: Huh? Oh, okay.

Gavin: Um. I’m not very good at making cakes. I’m still coming up with an idea.

Host: O-oh I see. Good luck Officer Gavin.

Host: Let’s see Professor Lucien’s latest progress.

Host: Professor Lucien, do you have any particular designs or ideas for the cake?

Lucien: You’ll need to wait and see it with your own eyes to appreciate it.

Host: Professor Lucien gives off an unpredictable feeling, we’ll look forward to see your amazing work.

Host: Lastly we have Mr Victor.

Host: Wow, as expected of the Ultimate Chef, such extraordinary skills~

Victor: I do not want to be disturbed while cooking.

Host: Ah okay, so exquisite I can’t bear to eat it.

Host: Let’s wait to interview Mr Victor after he’s done.

Host: Lastly is student Shaw.

Host: This looks a bit peculiar… where did this idea come from?

Shaw: Art comes from life and life is to do as one pleases.

Host: Uh, very reasonable cake philosophy. We’re looking forward to your final product.

Host: Our 5 guests have completed their cakes. Up next is the exciting moment where we unveil the cakes. Let’s invite our 5 chefs to unveil their cakes!

Kiro: As you can all see, this is the Chips Cake! Unique taste guaranteed!

Gavin: Erm. I drew Pearly. Doesn’t really look like her, hope she’s not angry.

Lucien: A ripe cherry will definitely make people want to eat it more *sparkle*

Victor: Time was limited, so I could only put some simple decorations.

Shaw: My cake obviously has my style.

Host: They’re all very unique and exciting. Thank you for sharing.

Host: We’ll take a short break and then continue with our final segment.

~ Kitchen Battle Anniversary Ceremony ~

Host: Congratulations all for completing the cake.

Host: Kitchen Battle ~ Food enriches life - eat well, drink well, and tomorrow will be well ~

Host: Thanks again to our 5 guests. We’ve also prepared a big cake! We welcome everyone watching to celebrate the anniversary with us!

Gavin: Kitchen Battle has helped many people learn how to cook, I too have learned a lot today. May this program continue to get better and better. Happy 5th Anniversary.

Kiro: Here’s to wishing this show will continue to proper next year too and share delicious food with everyone! Happy 5th Anniversary!

Shaw: Today was fun! Looking forward to a harder battle next year, Happy 5th Anniversary!

Lucien: Although our time was short. I’m very glad to have spent this unforgettable and lovely night with you all. Happy 5th Anniversary everyone.

Victor: I’ve always believed in the healing power of good food. Looking forward to discovering even more good food with everyone in the future. Happy 5th Anniversary.

All: Happy 5th Anniversary!

Host: That’s all for today’s program. Thank you all for participating and thank you all for watching! See you next time!

#mlqc #im too lazy to proof read so if you see any problems feel free to poke #stuff i post #temporary terrible translations tag #zzzzzzzzzz #sobbing at lucitorshaw #sobbing at lucien choosing eggs #sobbing at - i still have no idea wtf gavin did to those eggs

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