acenettle

[acenettle]

If Kasslyne doesn't have a multiverse and the future already exists inside the khert doesn't this mean that none of the characters have free will? Their actions are all pre ordained.

Leaving aside the idea that free will perhaps doesn't meaningfully exist regardless, I would say that no, the khert does not ordain actions. Actions were taken, are taken, and will be taken; but the khert exists in a place apart from time and reality, where all of the actions of reality are known and kept. The memories of those actions are present because they happened. If they had not happened, they would not be present. The khert does not compel actions; it simply preserves them.

[acenettle]

I've been thinking lately about Granny Weatherwax as asexual representation, and while these thoughts are random I figured I'd post them and see if anybody has something to add.

First of all, I know Granny isn't canonically asexual. But. She's an old lady (I don't recall her exact age but I'd guess 70-80?) who is canonically a virgin. And she's okay with this! The text never treats this as a tragedy; she never feels regret over this, she has no desire to change this. Other things were more important to her than sex (or, for that matter, romance, but I don't feel able to analyze that angle of it), and that's okay! And while Nanny (who is certainly not asexual) finds this a bit weird, she's okay with it in the end, she accepts Granny's differing priorities. And it's just - Granny has never had sex, but she's not less for it, she hasn't missed out on anything, her life isn't any less fulfilling for the lack of it.

And that gives me, as a young asexual, hope. Because it's so easy to feel that I have to have sex, that if I don't I will have missed out on some checkbox of a complete life, that I will regret not having it. It's so easy to feel that sense of dread and hopelessness, that how can I be a happy and fulfilled adult if I choose not to have sex. But - Granny is a very rare character that I can read and see that no, I can be fulfilled and complete even as an old lady without ever having had sex, because that's not some prerequisite for what gives life meaning. And that's so rare to see but I really appreciated it.

Anyways, that's just my two cents.

#reblogged post

[acenettle]

[acenettle]

Oh, these are great! I’ll try to comment on them individually once I have the time!

A study of Discworld

Color of Magic, pt 13

A shorter piece, 6 moths to Krull

Keep reading

#sorry it took me so long to get back to you #I've been writing job applications #it's kind of stressful

[acenettle]

As for creativity vs consistency, most fiction has minimal worldbuilding, one lesson/insight per book/episode (if that), and servicable descriptions. Consistency is a bare minimum of quality.

But this book has truckloads of the first, so wanting consisteny felt like judging fish on how well it flies. Does that make sense?

It does make sense, and I agree - not all books (or genres) require consistency. I think it’s important to take note that the books are inconsistent - I really wasn’t sure whether I was just imagining things before you pointed it out originally - but that doesn’t need to reflect on the book’s quality.

...But now that I’m thinking about it, I don’t think that consistency, or lack of it, was ever the main issue for me, though. I guess it was just that - and I’m kind of thinking aloud here - since I had read so many female characters in other works that were kind of lacking, I got really attached to Margolotta, and to Sybil on my re-read. And then the narration kind of goes “Oh, you thought women could have their own ambitions, their own interests, outside of their family? Of course not, don’t be silly. Women must always play supportive roles; that is all a woman could ever want. Of course a woman MIGHT have to play some other role, but eventually circumstances change, or they realise the error of their ways - realise they don’t NEED to be sword-wielding heroes, but CAN actually be hairdressers - and settle down into their supportive roles. It is the feminine thing to do.”  And I’m here going “Fuck you, no it’s not.” Like, great that your particular character would like nothing better than to stay in the kitchen, but I can’t applaud that character for being empowering in her choices when all she’s choosing to do is exactly what’s expected of her. 

I don’t think the books are written that way out of any sort of malice, though. I guess it feels like the woman are just written as... a man’s idea of Female People, if that makes sense? Like, they are absolutely written as people, rather than just objects or love interests or sex symbols or something else like that, and that IS better than in a lot of other books. But it’s like their Happy Ending is becoming supportive characters - or just largely disappearing from the narrative, like Eskarina, for example. And it’s not an ending that makes ME happy at all.

The thing is, it wouldn’t really matter to me overly much, if I WAS just reading these books because they are funny. But at some point I actually started caring about them and the characters, or the concepts that are depicted. Like the dot dot dot relationship between Vetinari and Margolotta? That’s important to me, and that’s something I wish to explore in writing. And off-hand, I can’t really think of any other story with that exact dynamic, so it doesn’t feel like I can just easily go explore it elsewhere? (Though luckily I write fan fiction mostly for myself, so it doesn’t matter to me whether other people find my stories interesting or in-character or whatever.)

I think it’s easy to forget about Wuffles, he doesn’t have all that many appearances! Where can I find these Vetinari drabbles you mentioned? I’d like to read them, too.

A study of Discworld

Color of Magic, pt 13

A shorter piece, 6 moths to Krull

Keep reading

[acenettle]

That's when I realized that this book, and Discworld in general, should be enjoyed in the moment, without looking for broad strokes.

Yes, magic and vampires and Colon change from book to book, to be whatever the narative needs them to be. But this doesn't bother you as you read it. In the moment that Colon is a bad cop, you laugh at him.

Yes, Sybil and Margolata fade into support roles, but then you meet Adora and Glenda and a whole regiment of badass women. And Tiffany doesn't fade out, but grows into power.

No, the worldbuilding isn't very consistent, but Pratchet already admited as much: "a Creator with more imagination than mathematical aptitude." I can only hope to have his self awearness.

And that doesn't take away from the briliance of those one-liners

Yes, that’s all true – and funnily enough, that’s how I originally read Discworld... and a lot of other books, too.

...Okay, this is a huge tangent, but like… as a kid I loved to read anything I could get my hands on, and that was mostly whatever material my local libraries happened to have. A lot of it was translated, and it was not uncommon for the translations to be out of order, or for a long book to be broken up into several volumes, so I might read the ending of a book before I ever read the beginning. So, I didn’t really… expect consistent characterisation - or any characterisation, for that matter. Or plot. I didn’t expect to understand what was going on, or to like any of the characters. I just liked reading words and sentences, and at that point that was enough.

Thing is… that’s one way to enjoy books, but I don’t really find it all  that satisfying at this point. I guess I slowly grew to be a more critical reader? I know it started with observing that what was depicted in the books I was reading was in no way reflective of the world I saw around me, though. Like, some books would have no female characters at all, and the ones that did depicted them overwhelmingly as scared, emotional, sentimental and soft… while in my surrounding culture the ideal woman was seen as strong, stoic, pragmatic and independent, even cold or cruel - a person who keeps things running, and keeps their emotions under control (except maybe anger - that’s just about acceptable). The idea has  been that a woman may have to sacrifice their own needs and happiness to keep society running, which is a different sort of constraint from the ones that women in fantasy usually face, but a constraint nonetheless. I think I find it interesting to explore women being ambitious, and being able to take and not just give, and taking or creating their own happiness, whatever that may be – without that necesserily meaning they’d have to abandon their duties.

Anyway, uh, to get back to Discworld, the most relatable characters in the whole series has probably been Granny for me, and even she just… lives in her cottage, basically, with no great ambitions beyond that. I can see glimpses of the sort of women I’m interested in exploring in some of the other Discworld characters, but only glimpses, and it’s a little frustrating – it’s almost what I want but not quite. Now, I often end up wondering what the point of writing Discworld fan fiction even is for me, given the source material isn’t quite what I’d like it to be… but I’m sort of hard pressed to find anything else that has that dynamic, either, and because it’s so inconsistently written, it feels like in some alternative timeline it COULD BE what I want it to be, and then I try to fill in the gaps in a way that feels satisfying to me, yet still fits the setting. If that makes sense? (Plus, I mean, other than the women falling short of the women I see in real life, and it not being as diverse as it could be, it’s still a great series, with an interesting setting and funny characters, so. I still enjoy it despite all that?)

So, to sum up – I think it’s perfectly fine to read the Discworld books by focusing more on the word and sentence level, at least if you can switch your reading into that sort of a mode. It makes writing fan fiction a little difficult, though, but on the other hand, it kind of also allows you to fill in the gaps in whatever way you’d like, too, so it’s not necessarily a bad thing.

A study of Discworld

Color of Magic, pt 13

A shorter piece, 6 moths to Krull

Keep reading

#this got longer than I meant it to #hopefully it makes sense though

[acenettle]

Yeah, I can see how it’s really jarring. I feel like it’s maybe more of a feature of nonsense literature than a bug, but I’ve stopped reading some books because they just went too far with it and once it was clear nothing had any consequences, I just didn’t care what was happening any more.

I guess maybe CoM just isn’t that clear on what genre it’s even meant to be, though. Like, the beginning seems like parody of the Sword and Sorcery genre, which from what little of it I’ve read seemed really action-oriented and episodic. But then the dragons seem like a loose parody of the Pern books by Anne McCaffrey, which seem like they’d be fantasy at first but turn out to be science fiction. The dragons can teleport (or possibly dimension travel) and time travel, too, now that I’m thinking about it, so that might have been inspiration for the sudden plane trip, too?

A Study of Discworld

Color of Magic, pt 12

Wyrenburg. This one covers a lot more ground.

Keep reading

[acenettle]

The Universe jumping reminds me a lot of the sort of stuff you’d randomly run into in books like the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy... and while that’s more sci fi than fantasy, it’s not like Pratchett didn’t write sci fi too. I haven’t read all of his early works due to them not being easily available, but I think Strata at least involved a science fiction proto-Discworld, so it sort of feels like it’s all along the same continuum.

I guess what I’m saying is that the Universe jumping is just the sort of thing that’s supposed to happen in this particular genre of books. I guess CoM might actually be closer to nonsense (the literary genre) than actual fantasy in places. The point of nonsense seems to be things just happening without much logic behind them.

A Study of Discworld

Color of Magic, pt 12

Wyrenburg. This one covers a lot more ground.

Keep reading

[acenettle]

Edit: Link to first part here

The next chapter of this story! Madam Meserole makes an appearance.

Madam Meserole was in the small sitting room next to the kitchen; she appeared to be in the middle of reading a pile of letters and petting her orange cat, who was sprawled smack in the middle of them. She looked up.

"Ah. I thought I heard the dog barking.”

"The doors are closed, don’t worry.” He sat down on the sofa opposite her. "I have... news.”

"Really? This soon?” Madam placed the letters down on the table and turned her attention to him. "Well?”

He handed her the book, along with the notes. There was a quiet moment as she scanned the text.

Finally, Madam sat back.

"How very fortunate. Well done, Havelock. I’ll have to see which branch of the Scaevola family wishes to have its heirloom back the most. My money is on his brother’s descendants, though the grandson of his mistress also has tricks up his sleeve. Or do you think maybe the daughter’s family will surprise uh?”

”I really couldn’t say.”

”In any case, the money should go a long way towards -”

She was interrupted by a maelstrom of noise and pet hair. The doors to the sitting room had flown open, and a small, grey dog barged in, greeting the occupants with growls and barks. The orange tom on the table let out a tortured yowl and leaped up in the air, landing somewhere in the vicinity of Madam’s shoulders.

An older woman in a pale green nightshift leaned against the doorframe.

“I didn’t realise you were still awake, Roberta,” she said in a thin, strained voice. “Havelock, you’re back early.”

Havelock got up and caught the woman by the elbow, while Madam tried to wrangle ten pounds of hissing cat out of her hair.

"There, there,” she said, "the evil dog is not going to get oo. And Mother,” she addressed the older woman, "you should be resting.” She nudged the dog with one foot. The dog, unperturbed, caught her slipper between its teeth and started pulling. ”Oh, for goodness’ sake! Havelock!”

He gave his aunt a look that said that even he couldn’t be in two places at once, and helped his grandmother settle down on the sofa. Then he went and picked up the dog, and carried it out of the room.

The sitting room doors had glass paneling, and did little to muffle the sounds.

"You really shouldn’t tire yourself like this,” Madam was saying, "but since you are already up, I might as well tell you. Havelock and I were just discussing settling some financial matters. This seems like an excellent opportunity to retire. To you as well, Mother. I hear Pseudopolis is lovely this time of the year. Or Quirm. Or even Chirm – the seaside is, I hear, very picturesque.”

"Dear girl,” said the older woman, "I have lived in these parts for forty years. I’m not going anywhere.”

"Mother, please be sensible.”

”I have already spent far too much of my life being sensible, Roberta.”

”At least think about it overnight. Here, let me help you up.”

And so it went. It was an argument that had taken place numerous times before, and so even an optimistic estimate would put the chances of it being resolved any time soon close to nil.

Vetinari let the dog out into the garden, where it ran around in enthusiastic circles and lifted its leg against a flower pot. The sounds of the argument receded as the two ladies ascended the stairs, and grew louder again when they neared the upstairs windows.

It occurred to him that he was feeling vaguely displeased, though he couldn’t quite figure out why. After all, his gamble with finding information at the vampire’s castle had paid off, and rather better than he had dared hope, at that. If anything, he ought to have been happy, and yet all he could do was regret that it was over.

It made no sense. He had enjoyed Lady Margolotta’s company, of course, but they had only known each other for a few weeks; far too short a while, he thought, to form any sort of lasting attachments. And yet…

He stared out into the night, and found himself missing her. Which was…

Well. It was certainly something.

#Lord Vetinari #Lady Margolotta #Roberta Meserole #Discworld #Discworld fan fic #fan fic #Sims 4 #don't we love each other in our own ways

[acenettle]

Edit: Link to first part here

Link to next part here

More Margolotta/young!Vetinari fic! Also features Igor.

“There’s that young man again,” the Smith remarked to Igor, while wiping sweat off his brow. He nodded towards the main entrance where the man in question had just crossed the courtyard.

“Hasn’t he been here… almost every night for some weeks now?” asked Etta, the maid, from where she was picking up an armful of firewood from the pile.

“Yeth,” said Igor, “every night, without fail.”

“How strange. They don’t usually come back.” A wistful look crossed her face. “Do you think the mistress has… taken a liking to him?”

“I thuppothe it might be pothible,” Igor said uneasily, “but it ith not my plathe to quethtion the mithtreth on what the doeth with her food.”

Etta blanched. “Oh, I’d never dare to get involved in her business! Of course not! You both know that!”

The Smith grunted in affirmation. Etta turned back to the firewood. ”But still, you have to wonder what it is they do.”

Igor sighed. ”They like to talk and read, and that ith all I know.” He eyed the various items around the smithy, which included a good number of tools and buckets, along with a planter box. "Did you repair thith already?” he asked the Smith, a little louder than necessary.

“All the corners have been reinforced, just as you asked.”

"That ith very good. I’m thure there will be no more ethcapeeth!”

Igor hefted the planter box on his shoulders and headed indoors, shaking his head.

He was in his laboratory in the cellars, not half an hour later, when the door creaked and the young man at the center of all the talk stepped in.

“Ah, Igor,” he said, “I was looking for -” He paused. ”My word.”

Igor followed his gaze around the room. The walls were filled with shelf after shelf of interesting jars and knickknacks, spare parts and the occasional remnant of a failed experiment. On a shelf above his bed, something squishy went ‘blob’.

“That is quite a number of organs,” said Vetinari.

“No, thur,” Igor said somewhat more patiently than he felt, “the organ ith upthtairth.”

There was another pause. Vetinari’s expression did not change.

”Ah, yes. Of course,” he said at last. ”Ah. I was, however, looking for an additional stack of books that, I believe, her Ladyship mentioned could be found down here. I would have asked her, of course, but she appears to still be sleeping.”

“Very thenthible to athk me, thur,” Igor said, setting his tools aside. “I think the mithtreth would have been quite upthet to be woken up thith early.” He led the man out of the doors and into the corridor beyond. ”The thtacth are thith way.”

Later that evening, Lady Margolotta and her guest found themselves in one of the sitting rooms, which tended to be cooler than the library, at least during the summer months.

It was an hour before midnight when Vetinari leaned over his maps, and double checked the book he was reading, and focused on the map with renewed interest.

”Ah, I do believe I have it now,” he said. “Our meandering explorer must have turned around here,” he pointed at the map, ”and taken the road through this valley. It’s the only route that is even remotely plausible.”

Her Ladyship squinted at his finger.

“There used to be a village there,” she said. “Vell over a century ago. Mining, timber, that sort of thing. Of course, the vein dried up, and people moved on.” She thought for a moment. “They did have a graveyard. I vould start the search there. Just make sure you are vell armed, yes?”

“I’ll be sure to remind my aunt of that. Happily, she is in town, though she does intend to leave in the morning.” He opened the book anew, and set his quill and ink fount on the table, along with his notebook. “Of course, it does mean my business here is concluded, and I believe we had a… deal.”

“Oh, yes.” The vampire smiled.

“So, then.” The scholar was not easy to read, but Margolotta had years of experience and supernatural senses; there was a quickening of pulse, and a barely noticeable tensing of shoulders. She allowed the silence to stretch, just for a moment, and savoured the reaction.

But it would have been unkind to take it beyond that.

Lady Margolotta sighed, and went to one of her cabinets. "You have an aunt vho is vaiting for you. Go and catch up vith her. I vould not vish to keep her vaiting.”

"But -”

“You may as vell keep the book. It vill be easier than copying, and certainly much better than cutting out pages.”

“Indeed.” To his credit, this time there was no reaction at all.

"I’d suggest you go before I change my mind." She poured herself a drink and gave him a courteous nod. "Perhaps ve vill meet again, Lord Havelock Vetinari.”

#Lord Vetinari #Lady Margolotta #Discworld #discworld fan fic #fan fic #sims 4 #don't we love each other in our own ways #which is my tag for this story

[acenettle]

I don’t think the Black Ribboners/Temperance League are entirely against blood, though? I think it’s said somewhere that Margolotta was one of the founding members of it, and her conversation with Vimes doesn’t indicate giving up all blood – far from it:

’One bite would be one too many?’ said Vimes. He recognised the mangled mantra. ’You’re a … a teetotaller?’

’Almost four years now.’

’No blood at all?’

’Oh, yes. Animal. It’s rather kinder to them than slaughter, don’t you think? Of course, it makes them docile, but frankly a cow is unlikely ever to vin the Thinker of the Year avard. I’m on a vagon, Mister Vimes.’

’The wagon. We call it the wagon,’ said Vimes weakly. ’And … that replaces human blood?’

’Like lemonade replaces vhisky. Believe me. However, the intelligent mind can find a… substitute.’

– From the Fifth Elephant

And in Raising Steam it’s said Margolotta has gotten other vampires to either quit drinking blood or at least tone it down, so it might not actually be an all-or-nothing deal at all.

The thing is, it’s pretty easy to headcanon this all as having a lot of variation. The Temperance League clearly has different branches. Do the vampires in charge of those – such as Vargo in Ankh-Morpork – really understand what they are doing? The vampires try to adapt a lot of human concepts for themselves without really understanding any of them, and frequently go overboard. It would be easy to fix it as just saying there was maybe some original idea and it got lost along the way. Or maybe, because all the vampires are so different, some of them don’t even require any sort of blood at all? Who can say?

a Study of Discworld

Color of Magic, pt 10

Fewer quotes, more thoughts.

Keep reading

[acenettle]

Yes, Nanny’s treatment of her relatives is appalling. I think it’s also implied that before she had the in-laws, she was doing this to her daughters? Like, only doing housework until her eldest daughter was old enough to do it, or something? It’s certainly a character flaw, and… I feel like it’s entirely okay for characters to have even really major flaws, but sometimes, those flaws going entirely unadressed by the narrative makes it kind of difficult to enjoy the character. That’s not the case for me with Nanny, or with Vimes – I can acknowledge she’s acting in a way that’s appalling and abusive, and move on, because none of it hits me personally, and it’s much the same with Vimes. With some other characters – like Susan, for example – the flaws hit much closer to home, though, and I just choose to deal with it by not engaging with those characters at all. Unfortunately, none of it is helped by other readers putting these characters on pedestals. I don’t want  to yuck someone’s yum, so to speak, but sometimes I do want to discuss these topics and analyse them, you know?

I absolutely agree with you both on Carrot and Angua. I think I just kind of mentally wrote the two of them off as just having a weird dynamic, and if it works for them, great, but, well, not my thing. At all.

As for the vampires… well, you can read them any which way, because they are not particularly consistent, right? I don’t see Margolotta quitting human blood as harmful to her. What we know of her suggests she didn’t arrive to the decision overnight – she talks about little steps, ’suck but don’t impale’ (not impaling people sounds like a really good decision!), realising she really wanted power, and then control. So it sounds like, through increasing understanding of herself, she just found more acceptable ways to channel her vampiric desires. And she still drinks animal blood – the Magpyrs seemed to be of the opinion that vampires do need blood for nutritional reasons, and Granny recalled a queen in Lancre who had been turned and made do by eating steak and being cruel. The queen sounds very similar to Margolotta in some ways – as in, drinking human blood would satisfy both the physiological and psychological vampiric needs, but they can also be satisfied separately with no issues.

But… I don’t see how any of that works for the other vampires. Otto? Maybe – It’s possible, just about, that a big part of being a vampire for him was always about the aesthetic, and then he ended up with photography due to that. And he is seen eating rat at least in one scene. But Maladict(a)? If there actually were some sort of rules to this, they are out of the window (or at least heavily altered) by the time we get to this particular character. And with Sally we don’t actually have the details, so anything goes.

Eh, I need to go now. I have a few more thoughts, but I’ll try to get back to them later.

a Study of Discworld

Color of Magic, pt 10

Fewer quotes, more thoughts.

Keep reading

[acenettle]

Oh, I absolutely love Discworld too! I think it makes discussing the flaws kind of hard, though – especially when I’m never sure if maybe I’m just seeing things, or simply not getting something. A lot of people praise Pratchett’s female characters, for example, and yet most of my problems have to do with said female characters – especially how almost all of the recurring ones just have to be put in nurturing or supporting roles, like that was somehow the real calling of every woman ever. And I really don’t know how to feel about it when it happens to female characters that were initially introduced as something else, that had the potential to be something else – but clearly didn’t have the narrative space for that, in the end. I guess it feels less bad, somehow, that the shifting characterisation happens to a lot of male characters, too.

I do agree that Carrot can sometimes be a bit creepy, but luckily I never had any strong feelings about him one way or another. It’s the characters that I’d love to like, and who mean something to me personally, that I struggle with the most.

a Study of Discworld

Color of Magic, pt 10

Fewer quotes, more thoughts.

Keep reading

[acenettle]

Well, one thing I’ve been trying to figure out is vampires and how they are supposed to work. The easiest answer is that there ARE no universal rules for vampires, just a bunch of stuff that may or may not apply to any given vampire, and I think  that is even stated to be the case at least regarding the ways they can be killed. But then the vampires still act like there are some universal rules regardless? They don’t behave like they are all so unique you can make no generalizations.

So yeah. To give an example, it seems impossible to even figure out basic things like how aging works for vampires – Vlad and Lacci seem like (and are treated as) teenagers but they are over 200 years old, while Sally ALSO looks like a teenager, but isn’t particularly treated as one, and she’s around 50. Will she continue to look like a teenager for the next 150 years? Would other vampires, if they interacted with her, treat her as a child? Do vampires simply not age? With Sally that might make sense – she could have been turned as a teen and then be forever stuck that way, we just don’t know. But Vlad and Lacci must have been babies at some point, since they were born vampires. Did it take them 200 years to age to where they are now, or did they age fast to a certain point – so they looked like teens when THEY were 50 - and then it slowed down for them? And one could easily come up with a solution to all this that accounted for both Sally AND Vlad and Lacci, but the point is mostly that the inconsistency is not actually explained anywhere in the books,  and that it’s similarly inconsistent for all the other facts you can find about vampires, to a point where I have to assume a whole lot of things and make up a whole lot of additional rules for the basic framework to remain consistent.

Then there’s the mess that is Margolotta’s characterization across the three books where she makes an actual speaking role appearance. I really liked her the first time she showed up – the subsequent times, not so much. And I’d actually say the same for Sybil, having recently gone back and re-read Guards! Guards! I really loved how into her dragons she used to be! But for both of these women, while they are stated to have interests that are important to them – power and control for Margolotta, dragons for Sybil – those things sort of get brushed aside in favour of characterizing them as kind, helpful women who like nothing better than playing a support role for a man. Which I’m pretty meh about, honestly – it’s their interests that made them captivating in the first place, why not let the ladies pursue them rather than brushing them under the rug the moment the narration needs the women to act in more conventional ways?

a Study of Discworld

Color of Magic, pt 10

Fewer quotes, more thoughts.

Keep reading

[acenettle]

More of this Sims 4/Discworld crossover story! I gave Vetinari a grandparent so my game would understand how he and Madam Meserole are meant to be related.

Lady Margolotta had not, truth be told, expected to meet the scholar again. Certainly one night should have been more than enough for him to either ascertain her library didn’t contain what he was interested in, or for him to find some detail that sufficed, even if it wasn’t the whole picture, and make his escape.  But either Lord Havelock Vetinari was a very dedicated researcher…

…or after something else entirely.

Her inquiries over the next few days suggested that, at least for the most part, he’d been telling the truth. There really did seem to be an aunt, though she apparently travelled quite a bit, and Igor who ran the apothecary in Bonk also knew of a grandmother in ailing health, and recalled seeing Havelock visiting her as a boy for the holidays.

She also learned he was an Assassin, which was not much of a surprise, given his background, and that he had inherited quite the fortune from his father’s side of the family.

Such a keen, astute young man, and not one, she thought, likely to harbour plans of staking her in her sleep. This was, all told, rather an unusual situation, but also an entertaining one, even if it was almost entirely about business.

Almost entirely…

It had started to rain, some time in the small hours of the morning. Wind whipped the heavy drops against the window, filling the library with a slightly arrhythmic drumming sound.

They had finished reading for the night. Lord Vetinari stood at the window, peering at the clouds. He turned when she approached.

“The weather seems to be - “

“Frightful?” she interjected, and then waved a hand towards the doors leading deeper into the castle. “You are velcome to stay until it clears.”

“I should get back home.”

“Your grandmother vould not vish for you to be out in such conditions. No grandmother vorth her salt vould.”

“You may well be right, madam, but -”

“Food and bedding are, of course, provided. Etta, dear?” The last bit was directed to a servant who had been dusting the shelves.

“I’ll see to it, mistress.” Etta curtsied hurriedly and left. Lord Vetinari sighed.

“And what of you, madam? Did you plan on staying awake?”

“For you?” She smiled. “Perhaps for an hour or two more. It vill eventually be daytime, even if it’s overcast.  It tends to give me a headache.”

“I wouldn’t wish to inconvenience you, madam, but if it would only be for a few hours…” His gaze meandered through the library and settled on a chess table, nestled neatly between two bookcases. ”However, I tire of reading. Do you play at all?”

—

It was a wonderful game. He did not play the way most gentlemen did, in the polite fashion of avoiding sacrificing his own pieces, and while she was sure he couldn’t know about some of the more unusual openings that were the heritage of the Evil Empire, both his ability to adapt and his tactics were truly remarkable. Oh, yes; he was quite a fascinating young man indeed.

Later, when she settled down into her coffin, she idly wondered what might eventually become of him, given enough time.

#lord vetinari #lady margolotta #discworld #sims 4 #discworld fan fic #fan fic #don't we love each other in our own ways #which is my tag for this story

[acenettle]

I decided to continue this little thing! We learn what Vetinari was researching.

The Cartographer’s Guild in Ankh-Morpork had, over the years, developed a number of practises that made its maps useful as reference material for the actual terrain, rather than mere works of art; whoever had drawn the maps of Bonk and its immediate surroundings had apparently heard of none of them, besides which, Lord Vetinari suspected, they had spent considerably less time observing the landmarks than observing the bottom of a tankard of beer.

Nevertheless, when combined with the maps he had already been in possession of, his newly stolen documents proved to be of some small use.

He got some rest, performed a few light tasks, and, well before sunset, picked up his notes and made the hike back to the castle.

He had managed to get in a few hours of study before the vampire found him; he looked up as she entered.

"Ah, Lady Margolotta. Here for your library fee?”

She waved a hand.

"No. I merely vanted to vish you a good evening.”

“That seems… surprising.”

“I can vait until you are finished. I vould not vish to interfere vith your… research."

"Quite considerate of you.”

"I have also already eaten.” She moved closer to the desk. “Vhat is it you are reading, Lord Vetinari?”

"Igor didn’t tell you?”

"The only thing he managed to discern, I fear, was that you were interested in our fair little town. And the past.”

Vetinari nodded.

“Ah, yes. Quite well done of him. He is, I’ll admit, not too far off.”

She didn’t take the bait and ask him what he was researching; that, after all, would have required admitting she did want to know. Instead, she eyed the pile of books he had gathered, taking in the titles.

“And are you finding vhat you arelooking for?”

“At the moment? Not quite, I fear. Mr… ah, here…UmbertFrim claims to be writing regional history but, so far, all he has listed here is a collection of oral tradition and myths."

"Try his next manuscript.” She picked it up from the desk and flipped it open to the correct page.

"Fascinating.” His gaze leapt from word to word. It was, indeed, considerably closer to providing him with the information he needed. "You have a good recollection as to the contents of your, ah, collection?”

"Quite good, yes.”

"Then perhaps you’d care to assist me?” He paused. “It would certainly mean I’d be done with it that much sooner, which, naturally, would allow us both to conclude our businesses."

"Vell,” said the vampire, giving him a very… sharp… look, "I’m not exactly a researcher but, if you vish, you are of course velcome to some of my time.”

"Splendid. How should I put it, then…” He steeped his fingers in thought. ”Let us just say that I have an aunt who has recently found herself quite wealthy, and has developed an interest in… acquiring things. Such as a certain decorative item - a brooch, in fact - once worn by a man called Lord Scaevola. An avid writer. His correspondence was… extensive.”

“And you think it can be found here? In this part of the vorld?”

“I would think so. His last known whereabouts were in the Vilinus pass, though it can be surmised he continued his journey for at least a few days after that. However, his descriptionsof his planned route were… haphazard, at best, and in any case it was all a few centuries ago. Things have changed, since then."

"Lord Scaevola…? The name is vaguely familiar, but… vhat year did you say it vas? There is more material in the cellar. Vritings that are too messy or fragile to be kept on display.”

“Indeed?”

He gave her the correct year and what other useful details he could, and she disappeared for most of the night, flitting in and out again with fresh piles of parchment she had deemed to be at least bordering on helpful.

Eventually, the sky started getting lighter, which Vetinari decided should be his cue. He was not entirely unaccustomed to staying up all night - Assassins, after all, preferred the night and in any case, he’d always slept very little. But vampires were notoriously nocturnal and, more importantly, slept during the day, and it did seem... wise... to maintain a certaindecorum and not, in fact, intrude upon his host’s rest.

She helped him collect the books into neat piles on the table.

“Vill you be back?”

“Indubitably, madam. My business here is, after all, still unfinished.”

She held the door open and followed him out of the library. They passed through the hall where the altercation had occurred the day before. The other vampire’s arrival had been a fortunate development, he supposed, and yet there was still something about the whole incident that was… puzzling.

Then they were at the front door. He hesitated. "I suppose I should thank you for defending me yesterday.”

"Against Count Vargo St. Gruet? Vell, vhile the Lore does not disallow us from feeding on... rival territory, I can hardly let my household or guests to come to harm. My vord, it is hard to keep servants as it is.”

"A prudent policy, I’m sure. Though not one he seemed all too keen to follow.”

“He forgets. He is awfully keen, you know.”

“Keen on… blood?”

“Ve all are. It is only natural. Though the others are a little better at… remembering.”

“Interesting.” Havelock bowed smartly, and reached for the door handle. “Until tomorrow then, my lady.”

He stepped into the light of dawn. She, as expected, remained in the darkness.

#lord vetinari #lady margolotta #discworld #discworld fan fic #fan fiction #sims 4 #don't we love each other in our own ways #which is my tag for this story #eventual romance #though only kind of

[acenettle]

So. How about an AU in which, instead of briefly meeting Margolotta during the Grand Sneer, Vetinari is in Überwald for something of an extended holiday, and the two of them have a lot of time to sort their respective stuff out?

There was a knock on the front door. Igor, as per his duties, shuffled to open it. He’d been in the middle of an experiment involving cross-breeding bovine animals with vines; one of the perks of working in a vampire’s castle, he’d always thought, was the dearth of visitors.

A rather dapper young man, tall but thin, was standing in the castle courtyard, taking in the gargoyles and the ornamental bats.

”Yeth, thur?”

”Good evening, Igor,�� said the young man.

"Evening, thur,” said Igor, who couldn’t help but feel a little leery of a man who knew his name without them ever having been introduced.

The man nodded. "Lord Havelock Vetinari. A scholar, if you will. I have been led to believe that her Ladyship has quite the library…? Ah, and Igor sends his regards.”

"That ith quite dethent of him,” said Igor, not moving from blocking the doorway. "We had not thpoken thinthe the mithunderthanting latht month. I wath worried he wath thill upthet.”

"To be sure.”

"But yeth, the mithtreth doeth have a wide thelection of bookth.” Igor glanced at the bat engravings around the gate. "Though they might not be free to thee.”

The man followed his gaze.

"Indeed. I shall take that into consideration.”

There was simply no helping some people. Igor swung the door open and gestured for the man to step in.

"Thith way,” he said. "I thall let the mithtreth know.”

You could tell a good deal about a person by the rooms they occupied. The dining or meeting room Vetinari had been escorted to was grand, as befit a castle, and the thick curtains that blocked the light were a matter of course. The paintings were interesting; while Vetinari had never considered himself an expert on fine arts, he could still tell the quality was impeccable, and spoke of someone with an interest in art and culture, or at the very least an expensive taste.

There was a rustling of cloth behind him, and he turned to greet the Lady of the house. She was most certainly a vampire; if the flash of red in her eyes and her general pallor hadn’t given her away, she was also wearing bat earrings.

She smiled at him in a way he had seen in a woman - usually his aunt or one of her… business associates - many times before. (Though in those cases the smile had obviously not been directed his way, nor had it involved quite so much… teeth.)

"Vell,” she said, "vot a pleasant surprise. You must be Lord Havelock Vetinari?"

"And you, I presume, would be Lady Margolotta Amaya Katerina Assumpta Crassina von Uberwald. A pleasure.” He bowed, as a gentleman must.

"Igor says you are here to read.”

"Indeed.”

"I have alvays had a soft spot for… scholars.” She stepped closer to him, into his space, and her hand reached out to brush his face. He brushed it away.

"I only came to read, madam.”

She gave him a searching look, and backed off. "I see.” There was a shift in her entire demeanor as she turned towards the table. She pulled out a chair and gestured for him to join her, which he did. "Quite all right; ve all have different tastes. People simply… expect certain things of you, vhen you are a vampire. It can become quite tedious, yes?”

"I’m sure.”

"But you, Lord Vetinari, are here to read.”

"To do a small amount of research, actually, concerning -”

"There vill be a… library fee.”

"So I have been given to understand." There was a pause. ”Does it not concern you, madam, what it is I’m looking to find?”

"No.”

He lifted an eyebrow.

"I am a vampire, Lord Vetinari. Ve are only ever really interested in one thing.”

He looked at the paintings again.

"Somehow, madam, I find that hard to believe.”

Her expression didn’t change. He sighed.

"Might I at least see the library first?”

It was, indeed, a splendid library, and had all you could expect to find in one: tables and chairs to read on, a musty smell, and shelf upon shelf of tomes, bound in leather and paper. Vetinari walked down the main aisle, peering at the few titles he could see.

He went to pull out a promising book.

"Ahem,” said her Ladyship.

"Ah, yes. The… payment.”

"It does make people tired,” she informed him, "which makes seduction a rather practical approach. You are, after all, usually already in bed. Or near one, at any rate.”

"And yet, madam, I assure you it is not an option I wish to explore. How would you -”

There was a knock on the ornately decorated double doors, and Igor peeked in.

“I am thorry to interrupt, mithtreth, thur, but Count Vargo von Vilinuth ith here. He hopeth for an audienthe.”

A brief look of annoyance flashed over her Ladyship’s face, only to be chased away by a general look of indifference and boredom.

"Does he, really,” she muttered.

"He ith waiting on the roof.”

"Vell.” She turned to look at Lord Vetinari. "It seems ve vill have to continue this conversation another time, your Lordship. Such a pity. Igor, do stay and help the poor man find his books.”

She left. Igor looked somewhat displeased.

Vetinari picked out a handful of tomes.

"I believe I can manage from here,” he said to Igor. “I imagine you must be quite a busy man, with plenty of other things to do…?”

"Oh, yeth, thur. I think I finally have a viable offthpring! The hornth are juth tharting to peek out from the pot! I thould thertainly make thure there are no mithapth!”

“Splendid! Off you go, then.”

Igor, stubbornly, didn’t move. Vetinari tried again.

”Your continued presence is not necessary.”

"Yeth, thur,” said Igor, sounding pensive, and refusing to shuffle his feet towards the door, or any direction at all. Vetinari sighed.

"I suppose I should applaud your dedication to carrying out your employer’s orders.” He placed the books on a desk and considered. “Since you are here, Igor, perhaps you could fetch me some volumes pertaining to history or local geography?”

The books were… fascinating. One of them had contained several maps. He’d managed to persuade Igor to get him a midnight snack, and now the maps were safely tucked away inside his coat.

The food had not been terrible, either. Either the castle had a decent cook, or Igor had managed to find a good bakery for biscuits.

By now the sky was getting lighter, and there was a familiar sting in Vetinari’s eyes that suggested he had perhaps sat up reading for too long.

He thanked Igor - it was useful to be nice to the servants - and made his way to the cavernous entryway of the castle.

And there was, all of a sudden, someone right by his ear.

“Vell, hello,” said an overly excited male voice. “Vhat is it ve have here?”

Lord Vetinari did not flinch. The Assassin’s Guild spent years training their students out of such useless reflexes, besides which he tended to be always be on his guard, anyway. He had also not walked into a vampire’s castle unprepared, but -

“Vargo, dear,” said Lady Margolotta, somewhere further back, “I’m certain you have no intention of menacing my guest, now have you?”

“This is a guest?”

“Surely you must remember that everyvun here is either a servant or a guest, yes?”

The other vampire’s face fell, but then he brightened up again. “Ah, but vhen he leaves, then he vill no longer be a guest!”

“Vargo.” She waved her hand towards the interior of the castle. “Vhy don’t I show you some of those tapestries ve vere talking about? Such vunderful colours, you must come and see them.” She glanced at Vetinari over her shoulder as she escorted Count Vargo away. He wasn’t entirely sure, given the low light, but he could have sworn she rolled her eyes.

It was quite a long walk back to the house. He kept his eyes open for any swooping bats, just in case, but he needn’t have worried; he reached his destination without an incident.

It bode well, he thought, for this research project as a whole.

#Discworld #long post #Lord Vetinari #Lady Margolotta #this will get pretty shippy if I continue this #just a warning in case you don't ship them #discworld fan fic #fan fiction #sims 4 #don't we love each other in our own ways