ceratonia-siliqua

[ceratonia-siliqua]

Hi! I saw your response to an ask about your fic Forever, and I was trying to open the link you posted, but I keep getting an error message whenever I try to open it. Do you think you could put it in a google doc instead and post a link to that?

Sorry if this sounds pushy, I’d just really love to read it!!

Here ya go!

#forever fic #winterspider #marvel

[ceratonia-siliqua]

Hey! I was wondering if you have a copy of sweeter than sugar chapter 2? It's not available on the other author's account anymore and on yours it's only linked to hers! I'm just making a copy for myself on google drive so I can read it again :) Hope you're doing well!!

(also sorry I might have sent this twice, my wifi cut out so I wasn't sure if it sent!)

Today is the day of me releasing old fic content it seems! I just did Forever so here is the original document for Sweeter Than Sugar in its entirety: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ppBAdiz4_JtHMmV4PFcU5VcHaXKC5UFHuQHDxIiRiLQ/edit?usp=sharing

#winterspider

[ceratonia-siliqua]

Hi! Super weird question to ask, but, I was wondering if you were the person that wrote a fan fic of Bucky/Peter called “Forever.” On Ao3? If so, I always wanted to know what happened to that fic, because it was literally the best of literature I’ve read on Bucky/Peter. It was so good that I would go back to read it again, and I was wondering if you still had that fic, or if something happened to it, I just wanted to know because it still eats me up to this day that I can’t read it no more 😭. Also if this isn’t who I think it is, then I’m sorry please ignore this!

Hi!!! I'm not sure how old this message is but yes, I am the person who wrote Forever. The reason it got deleted was actually not by my choice. The coauthor was found out to be lying about faking a terminal illness and so she deleted her entire account on ao3 and I believe on tumblr as well. Ao3 terminates even coauthored fics if one person decides to remove it so the entire thing was removed and I have just never gotten around to fixing the issue because it was so time consuming and during the aftermath I was still finishing by Bachelor's degree and didn't have time to sort through and make sure I had all the files. Sadly, after checking it looks like all the files were deleted at some point.

But! I do have some good news! Ao3 emailed me some documentation of the original fic so I do have a readable version, it's just not formally posted anymore. I keep telling myself I'll get around to reposting it and so I haven't released the link but I have a feeling I might never get to it so here's the link since I feel bad its been hidden in a backroom for so long.

It is the story in its entirety and pretty much all the original information. Really the biggest hurdle to me posting it on ao3 has been needing to divvy things up into chapters and do all the tagging again.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy! Let me know if the link works. I tested it while logged out to make sure you didn't need to be signed into my throw away account to access the info and it seemed fine but confirmation doesn't hurt.

#Forever fic #winterspider

[ceratonia-siliqua]

I read svsss and I really liked the way they didn't communicate, nobody does it like them <3

#svsss #bingqiu #I love... my boys #also hi everyone it's been at least a year since I've reblogged something... oops

[ceratonia-siliqua]

Counterfeit jade

#svsss #shen qingqiu #bingqiu #luo binghe #sometimes what means the most to us has no value to others but it doesn't make it any less precious

[ceratonia-siliqua]

Big brother Binghe + Shen Qingqiu and his disciples  

Do Not Repost

#svsss #mdsz #tgcf #I love this for them #Also sqq being the only one not to follow the color schemes is amusing to me

[ceratonia-siliqua]

A cover of Bad Guy by Billie Eilish on guzheng, flute, and pipa—Tang Dynasty disco edition for Mid-Autumn Festival.

[eng by me]

[ceratonia-siliqua]

So I wanted to know what kind of crystal could go in a wizard staff, right? so I googled “big crystal,” as one does, and got an Etsy ad for This

And as you all know I Am currently taking a geology class, so I am probably more emotionally invested in minerals than usual. But that is...very obviously not a natural crystal.

So I did some looking around on Etsy.

Now, these shops all seem to advertise to the “witchy”/“spiritual healing” type of person. And there are a lot of them. Crystals are a Big Thing on Etsy. And ALMOST ALL of them are obviously artificially cut into the same sort of prism with a triangular pyramid top, regardless of the actual sort of crystal it is supposed to be.

Even like, fucking, obsidian. Obsidian is volcanic glass, it doesn’t form crystals at all, it is not a crystal

I’m not throwing any shade at people who are into crystals for like witchy reasons, but it really seems like if crystals are spiritually important to you, you should know what a crystal is...right...?

[ceratonia-siliqua]

everyone dunking on that automated fleshlight sex toy needs to remember that disabled people get horny too ok 💜

#sex education

[ceratonia-siliqua]

Yeah sure we’ve all binged a long fic, but have you ever read a WIP and followed someone’s life?

Tidbits of information - (“I graduated today!”) - and small joys (“It’s my birthday!”) and you get to be there to say “This chapter made me cry, happy birthday, thank you for gifting us this”.

I remember reading this fic of someone at the end of high school, older than me then. They seemed infinitely wise, spoke of their future career and getting into the college they wanted. I remember them posting on days they felt like nothing could bring them down - and on days the whole world did and it’s the aftermath of a hospital visit. Cancer, I think it was, their father. I got to the end of the story, I know their father was fine, but also they got to finish their WIP. I graduated three years later than them, still dutifully wrote thank you notes in every comment. I wonder if they remember me, or just the collective of people reading the story as it updates.

Four years ago I was into my first year of university, my first year of figuring out being out in public spaces. I made excuses as to why my name didn’t match my paperwork and read a fic on the train, the same five chapters over and over again for the next years as I thought the story abandoned. It updated this week after such a long hiatus, I left another thank you comment.

There’s an author I love, they update their stories like a clockwork. When they don’t, I check their blog, just to see if their doing alright, not because I feel like they owe me, just to ensure whether I better get out my laptop to write that really detailed university level essay chapter analysis to get them smiling when their day sucked.

And then, once, when I was 17, I read a fic that hadn’t updated in over a decade. I wasn’t even in primary school when it started posting. On the last chapter, I left a comment that, in retrospect, was horribly rambly and most likely full of grammar mistakes. The author replied and though I couldn’t see their face, I thought of them crying. They were married now, had children, and hadn’t thought about this fic in years. They went through their files again, found another half written chapter and an outline. I got two new chapters to read that year.

And then, recently, someone told me they got back into writing original fiction because of my comments. I get to read nearly weekly chapters.

I love binge reading a finished fic, but nothing is ever going to top the feeling of anticipation of waiting for a chapter, the pure joy when someone tells you I was done with this, but you made me think of it again, so this is for you.

Anyway, I think we should romanticize reading WIPs more, growing up alongside the authors writing the stories we love.

[ceratonia-siliqua]

Gay ships getting screwed over by homophobic producers/writers as soon as they get wind of it is nothing new, but what has been done to stucky really is uniquely cruel. 

I’ve never heard of a gay ship having one member’s importance to the other simply… written out of the show/film? (Has this been done?) 

Never heard of a gay ship having decades of important source material about them deliberately sabotaged just to spite a  gay ship (that wasn’t even canonically gay or ever going to be so, anyway?) 

Or having the (heterosexual-ising) female character literally put into the male character’s canon place, using his gay-inspiring scenes, with any other ship. 

I’ve never heard of an actor’s brilliant performance, which made certain lines iconic; whose skill as an actor is the very reason they’re iconic…  simply being taken away from him and credited to an untalented actress who never said them. 

Just to damage an un-canon gay ship?! 

Imagine they brought out new Trek shows with Kirk and Spock and said ‘anyway, Spock never meant anything to Kirk, every Spirk thing he said was actually said to/about his new wife Spacky (Woman who joined the Hating-Vulcans Society and hired guys to torture Spock) and here’s a flashback to Spacky as Kirk’s Chief Science Officer all those years. Also we will be buying up other media and editing all tie-ins to reflect that they are nOT GAY.’ 

It’s unprecedentedly monstrous.

[ceratonia-siliqua]

i know that binghe being extremely jealous isn’t “normal” or “sane” but i’m honestly on his side here. like his concerns that sqq will be stolen from him are pretty rational. i really think that almost every scum villain character, in the event that sqq would want to papapa with them, would agree almost immediately. sqq is the xianxia equivalent of helen of troy.

#svsss

[ceratonia-siliqua]

via

[ceratonia-siliqua]

Protector

#tgcf

[ceratonia-siliqua]

Whenever people try to tell me to ship "moral ships" I like to think about how inherently immoral it is to flirt with service workers at coffee shops where they're obliged to be nice to you so... many coffee shop AUs are like. Immoral. But given that they are a fantasy where this is instant romance without the fear of trapping a service worker in an uncomfortable situation that's tantamount to workplace sexual harassment, I enjoy the cutesy coffee shop AUs immensely.

And that's basically my attitude towards all fantasy. There's lots of things I enjoy in fantasy that wouldn't work IRL. Enemies to lovers. Sudden kisses. Miscommunications in relationships. Codependency. Fight sluts who physically assault each other while emotionally connecting.

Once you start ascribing your morals to the fiction you consume, you tend to miss the issues in even the most innocuous, innocent seeming scenarios. It's easy to judge other people's fictional enjoyment until someone points out your innocent coffee shop AU is romanticised workplace harassment.

But it's all fiction. It's a fantasy. That's why it's fine.

A lack of education around things like consent, healthy relationships, self respect and respect of others, bodily autonomy, etc, has made people think they can rely only on fiction to tell them what right - but that's dangerous. And unsustainable.

[ceratonia-siliqua]

thinking about how the world would be better if more people understood the differences between 'the author failed to tell the story they wanted to tell' and 'the author told the story they wanted to tell, but they told it badly' and 'the author told the story they wanted to, and they told it well, but it wasn't the story I wanted to read'

[ceratonia-siliqua]

I think a really good relationship dynamic is when one partner is an entirely absurd person and the other partner's perpetual thought process is, "I adore you. Why are you like this? I'm going to kiss you at such length and with such fervor that you'll get disoriented and stop being like this for five minutes and I can rest, for fuck's sake."