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More Screenshots from the upcoming title "Away in Graphical Limbo"

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Welcome back, my old "myself".

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You know where to find me. I will always be here.

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#traumacore #dreamcore

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#sa survivor #csa survivor #hypersexual

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#traumacore

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So my 'new' (new as in, finally just met them) alter Shel Ghostie switched in for two days. And we all (the whole head fam) were going over it tonight affer I got Shel to finally go back. I rarely switch at all so this was an emotional experience.

Ghostie's mind didn't spiral or go over the trauma cycling I'm so used to. It's like there was peace while I rested in our headspace. Ghostie got information from me where they needed it (basic stuff or passwords).

My misohponia didn't affect Ghostie. Not one bit. In fact they ate joyfully loud.

A few times they stared at the body's hands, which are mine usually, and they felt detached. And it was like staring at someone else's body. It was strange but it didn't upset them. They were just extremely frustrated my body didn't match how they look in the headspace, so they grabbed my eyeshadow to give them more of the ghost look (red around eyes) and changed my glasses to my clear pink ones (because they matched their eye color). Now, my eyes are watery and all messed up from the makeup. I never wear it because of this sensitivity.

Ghostie bought some overalls I'd been looking at (which were expensive, ouch) and they changed my clothes to better fit their peferences as much as they could. They didn't like my long jean skirt, they wanted pants and a t-shirt where I prefer the jean skirt and long sleeves. They liked my purple and orange halloween party necklaces so wore those. I usually don't.

They were 10x more social than me. I am not very social and struggle to know what to say half the time, but Ghostie was super talkative to our trusted friend and talked her ear off. They made themself a blog they wrote three long wntries in, and then made a Tumblr. Tonight they made an Instagram. They also changed my browser and really like the color blue (so made everything blue). They were careful to change browsers properly though and transferred all important info with my help.

Ghostie danced A LOT. My body cannot handle that much activity so they kept getting exhausted but would get up again because they have trouble just not dancing around.

They played a song on repeat for like an hour that they absolutely adored. When we switched back to me (Shane) and I played it, I liked the song but it wasn't something I'd have listened to more than once in one sitting.

Ghostie is more free and open with their confidence. They have no shame in being nude from the waist down and are not ashamed of self-pleasure. They are not ashamed of things that usually make me self conscious and ashamed. They are hypersexual as a trauma response, but it makes sense. They just engage with themself of course. Zagan (one of our spirit guides) agreed to be there for support at a distance and to make sure they are responsible with the body and safe. Byleth keeps his distance but also is there for support.

They are just pure joy. Even though they like traumacore and weirdcore/dreamcore, they are happy about it while it causes me distress sometimes.

It was just so nice. So peaceful. They are a teenager (it's important to note that alters that are underage are not true minors, as they are part of an adult body) so maybe that had to do with it. They are definitely attached to childhood trauma, and they are the ghost that got left behind after some of the stuff happened.

I think I started to unlock their door when I did that tarot reading about three years ago while exploring possible hidden trauma memories. I drew the ghost card from my oracle deck, and it was surrounded by cards mentioning a trauma happened and that is when a 'split' happened. So Ghostie is the teen that once might have been.

Ghostie knew it too. This is all so wild.

#pluralgang #plural family

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what year is it again?

#weirdcore #dreamcore #derealization #dissociation #dpdr

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the memories get fuzzier every year

#dpdr #weirdcore #dissociation #derealization #dreamcore

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Various audio snippets of my childhood that I've collected.

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