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hwaberry-dreams · 1 month

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NINETEEN: fears and reunions

Warnings: mentions of bipolar disorder, mental health and OCs fears around it, does not go into explicit details

Word count: 11.2k

Summary: It is the morning after the previous night's events, Seonghwa and Hongjoong have a conversation about Luna's condition. After some thought, Hongjoong decides to talk to her directly. Luna has a heart-to-heart with her mother before returning to the apartment, where everyone has come back from visiting their families.

(AN: this entire chapter is in 3rd person, I appreciate all the feedback on the different format and have decided to focus mainly on 3rd person now with Lunas 1st person POV during certain periods. Again any feedback on this is always appreciated! Thank you to everyone who has read, liked and reblogged so far!)

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“How was she this morning?” Hongjoong asks, a note of concern in his voice

“I don’t know. She left the apartment before 7am. I thought she was just on her regular morning run but when she still wasn’t back by 7.30am, I checked her room and her work things were gone.” Seonghwa replies. “I know she has a lot of work at the office today and maybe just wanted to get there as early as possible but it’s just worried me a little bit that she left so early.”

Seonghwa had messaged Hongjoong the night before to give him a brief rundown of what had happened. This morning he had got up early, planning to speak to Luna before she left for work. See how she was feeling after a nights sleep but she was already gone. It was now 9.30am and Hongjoong had called him after reading his messages when he woke up.

“When she told me about her bipolar, her main concern was that we would treat her differently. I wish I had been there last night so I could have reassured her.” Hongjoong sighs on the other end of the line

Seonghwa stiffens slightly at the implication, "Are you suggesting that I didn't do enough to reassure her?"

"No! That's not what I meant! You did your best. It's just...I feel so helpless!" Hongjoong exclaims, frustration evident in his tone. "I shouldn't have left Seoul. I should've stayed."

"You're our team captain, but even captains need rest. You couldn't have predicted this," Seonghwa says softly, trying to soothe his friend’s guilt. "Besides, Luna wouldn’t have let you stay even if you tried. Don't beat yourself up over this."

“You are right.” Hongjoong replies. “My dad is driving me back to Seoul in an hour or two so I will be home soon. Maybe I should get him to drop me off at the office instead so I can check up on her.”

“Do you think that is wise to do? Given how Luna hates being fussed over, she might feel cornered.” Seonghwa cautions

“I’m just worried.” comes Hongjoongs reply

"I understand your concern," Seonghwa reassures him. "Look, Luna's a fighter. She's been through so much, yet she remains resilient and strong. If you're set on seeing her before coming home, I won't stop you. Just tread carefully. We don’t want to push her away."

“I’m honestly unsure on what to do. As we get closer to Seoul I’ll see what my gut tells me. And you are right, she is an absolute fighter.” Hongjoong agrees “I am glad you were there for her last night. Do you think she’ll make things up with her mom?”

“Her dad assured me that this can be a common thing between them. Luna can’t suppress her feelings anymore and snaps, her mom gets more protective and Luna pulls away from her. He told me that they will patch things up either today or tomorrow but if it takes a bit longer, not to worry.” Seonghwa says as Hongjoong relaxes a little. He didn’t want a rift between mother and daughter when he knows how close they are and it is obvious how much her family, especially her mom means to her. “He also told me to reach out to him if we have any questions or looking for ways to support her without it being overbearing. He included the others in this.”

"That was considerate of him," Hongjoong remarks with a small smile, "Especially since they see you as her boyfriend and us as just coworkers."

“I don’t think he sees you all as ‘just coworkers’. He knows we all live together and I think Luna has been telling him little things about us all. He said he is thankful that we all look after her.” Seonghwa replies

“What are her parents like?” Hongjoong finds himself asking

“They are genuinely wonderful people. Her dad is really tall! A bit scary at first obviously but he is funny, down to earth and kind. He isn’t the scary old school military guy I had imagined in my head! Luna gets her caring nature from him.” Seonghwa answers with a small smile

“And her mom?” Hongjoong presses further

Seonghwa continues, “The same as her dad. Funny, laid back and really kind. She is tiny though, shorter than Luna but they look so alike. Obviously she can be pretty intense. She's fiercely protective of Luna, sometimes to a fault. But it all comes from a place of love. She wants the best for her daughter and can be a bit overbearing at times, but it's only because she cares so deeply.”

“It sounds like Luna is lucky to have such supportive parents.” Hongjoong reflects thoughtfully, “We just need to make sure she knows she can rely on the two of us, until she is ready to tell the others.”

“We will!” Seonghwa assures him, “We will be there for her as much as she will let us be.”

“Anyway, I should go make sure I have everything packed up. I’ll be back in Seoul soon,” Hongjoong sighs lightly

“I’ll see you when you get home and don’t worry about Luna.” Seonghwa replies before the pair say goodbye and hang up.

As Seonghwa gently places his phone on the sofa, his eyes shift towards her partially open bedroom door. Through the gap the early morning sunshine floods the room with warmth, casting a soft glow that extends into the little alcove between the lounge and her room. His heart sinks a bit, hoping that she is truly okay this morning.

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Hongjoong instantly feels relaxed the second he opens the door to his studio. It was his safe place, his little sanctuary. Spending 4 days without work was hard for him but he was determined to keep his promise to Luna that he would spend his break resting, enjoying time with his parents and his older brother who was also visiting them at the same time. He actually found that he was coming back to Seoul with a clear head though, the time away from his studio and work laptop gave him some clarity regarding the music he was currently working on, and he was excited to get started on it again.

He places his suitcase in his studio before leaving the small room and walking to the door next to his. Inside he can see a light shining through the frosted glass of the little window, a small smile creeping onto his face as he knows Luna is in there.

As he raises his hand to knock, a familiar voice calls out from behind him. Turning around, he sees Maddox, a close friend and fellow musician, approaching with a steaming mug of coffee in hand.

“Looks like I surprised you.” Maddox teases him with a grin. “I wasn’t expecting to see you until tomorrow morning at the very least!”

“You know me!” he laughs shrugging his shoulders. “I can’t stay away from here!”

Maddox raises an eyebrow in playful curiosity. "Don't tell me you have an English lesson with Luna on the same day you came home?"

Hongjoong quickly improvises, thinking on his feet. He couldn't possibly reveal that his sole purpose for stopping by the office was to see Luna. "Nope, not today! I just wanted to drop by my studio for an hour. But when I saw the light on in Luna's office, I can’t resist saying hi."

Maddox takes a sip of his coffee, amusement dancing in his eyes. "Ah, I see." Something in the playful look in his friends eye made Hongjoong feel like Maddox was seeing through him.

“How was your break? Did you work nonstop like usual?” Maddox asks

Hongjoong shakes his head, a slight smile forming on his lips. "No, not this time. I even left my work laptop in my studio."

Maddox lets out a laugh. "Miracles do happen! So, you're here, probably itching to get some work done now that you're back."

“Caught red handed!” Hongjoong jokes, playfully holding up his hands

“Well I better go. I am doing a live in 10 minutes. I’ll see you next week as the team has the final meeting on the new bands album.” Maddox says

“Gosh, their debut date is so close now!” Hongjoong smiles, fondly remembering his own with Ateez. “See you next week!”

As Maddox walks down the corridor and disappears from sight, Hongjoong's attention returns to Luna's door. He quickly scans the area to ensure no one else is around before knocking gently. A moment passes without any response, so he knocks again, this time a little louder.

A loud groan comes from within the room, followed by some mumbled swearing in English. Hongjoong's stomach tightens with worry, fearing that he might have interrupted her from important work. Suddenly, the door swings open, revealing a frustrated looking Luna. But as soon as she sees him, her expression softens and she pulls him into her room by his hand, swiftly closing the door behind them. Luna wraps her arms around his shoulders tightly.

"Joongie!" she exclaims blissfully.

Hongjoong is momentarily taken aback by her sudden display of affection but quickly recovers, reciprocating by wrapping his arms around her waist and holding her just as tightly. Her head buries into his neck and he can feel her warm breath on his skin.

“I missed you so much, Joongie!” she mumbles

"I missed you too," he replies, a genuine smile tugging at the corners of his lips. The sound of her calling him by that nickname sends a flutter through his heart. He takes a deep breath, inhaling her familiar scent of vanilla and coconuts. “I didn’t interrupt you, did I? You sounded a little annoyed when I knocked a second time.”

Luna pulls back slightly, looking up at him with affectionate eyes. "Of course not. I had my earphones in, and the loud knock startled me. I jumped and accidentally hit my knee on the desk."A faint blush colours her cheeks at the fact he heard her swearing.

“Is your knee okay?” he asks concerned

“It is fine! My own clumsy fault.” she replies “Why are you here? I thought we were meeting back at the apartment tonight.”

Hongjoong smiles and caresses her face gently with one hand. "I kept my promise to you - no work while I was away. I had decided to leave my laptop in the office and I wanted to pick it up before heading home."

Luna feels her heart swell slightly at the fact he had went so far to keep his promise to her.

“Plus I wanted to see you too.” he adds.

"Check up on me, you mean?" she teases gently. "I know Seonghwa would have told you what happened last night."

"Yeah, he did," Hongjoong acknowledges, worry etching his features. His voice carries a plea for understanding as he says, "Please don't be mad at him."

Luna recognises the worry in his eyes, mirrored from last night when Seonghwa asked if she was okay and when he told her he agreed with her mother about the big changes in her life. It was worry with a hint of fear in the eyes. It isn’t the first time one of them has said the words ‘don’t be mad/upset’ to her either.

"Hongjoong, do I make you feel uncomfortable sometimes?" she asks, searching his eyes for the truth.

Confusion flickers across his face as he asks, "What do you mean?"

"I've noticed in the past few days that sometimes you all seem a bit on edge around me," Luna explains. "It's like you're afraid to tell me something or voice an opinion like I'll fly into a rage or get upset."

Hongjoong hesitates before answering, searching for the right words. In that moment, Luna knows that her fears are not unfounded.

“I don’t want any of you to feel that way!” she tells him earnestly “I know I can be moody and hard to be around but I don’t want you all to be scared to talk to me or ask me how I am.”

Hongjoong's voice is gentle as he responds, moving one hand from her waist to cup her cheek. "Hey, you aren't moody or hard to be around. You make each of us so happy just by allowing us into your life. We're not scared of you; we just worry a little about upsetting you."

“I realise that I made a big deal about not wanting to be fussed over. However I don’t want any of you to be afraid of how I’ll react if you do. I know my condition will make you and Seonghwa worry twice as much, but I promise I won't get upset if anyone fusses over me.” she says, “The reason I said I didn't want to be fussed over is because of my moms over-protectiveness. I know it is because she loves me but I have to hold back so often with her, bite my tongue a lot that when someone else fusses over me, I tend to snap easily. I just didn’t want to take my frustrations out on any of you.”

Hongjoong nods in understanding, his dark eyes soft and sympathetic. "I understand, Luna," he says softly. "And I can only imagine the added stress and strain you must feel by concealing your bipolar disorder from the others."

Luna takes a deep breath before continuing, her voice trembling slightly. "That's why I've decided it's time to stop hiding and be honest with everyone about my bipolar disorder. I'm tired of living in fear, constantly worrying my sleeve will ride up or hiding when my medication like a dirty little secret. It's exhausting." She meets Hongjoongs gaze.

“Are you truly ready to do or do you feel you have to?” He poses the question to her, his voice gentle but probing.

Luna looks away for a moment, gathering her thoughts, before leaning back into his embrace once again. His arms encircle her protectively, and he starts rubbing soothing circles on her back.

"No," she whispers vulnerably, "I am nowhere near ready." She takes a deep breath and continues, "But I wasn't prepared for Seonghwa to find out and today I feel a little lighter. I told him everything, more than I told you about the scars, and there was no judgement. Neither of you have judged me."

“Baby, I'm glad you feel that way, but it's important for you to be truly ready." he cautions. “I don’t want you to do it and then regret it because it was too soon for you. Seonghwa and I will support you completely until that time comes, so do not worry about that.”

"I honestly don't deserve you," Luna sighs, her voice filled with gratitude. "Thank you."

They linger in each other's embrace for a moment, relishing the rare moment of solitude.

“Oh I had a meeting today. Whether it is good outcome or not I’ll let you decide since it involves you!” Luna beams up at him

Hongjoong recognises the mischievous glint in her eyes, prompting a smile to spread across his face.

“I am sure it will be good!” he chuckles, tucking some of her hair behind her ear

“The CEO has asked me to work with you all for the Japanese track. It’s mainly to ensure the Japanese lyrics and vocals are on point.” she says “Not that he doesn’t trust your Japanese!” she quickly adds, realising how her words might have sounded to him

“Are you kidding me? I think this is amazing news Luna!” he grins, feeling his stomach bubble with excitement

“I was hoping you’d be okay with this, me being a part of that process.” she returns his level of excitement. “I don’t know anything about making or producing music, and lord knows I am a terrible singer so should not be involved in any of that stuff!” she laughs before continuing “However I am very fluent in Japanese as it was the second language I learned as a child alongside Korean and I am confident in my skills in that regard. Eden has already given me the songs that will have a Japanese version and I am working on translating them now.”

"We're all pretty basic when it comes to Japanese." Hongjoong admits with a smile. "We usually bring in someone new for these tracks, someone we've never met before but it will be amazing to have you there, something we fully trust."

"I just hope I can contribute and not hinder anything," Luna replies.

With a gentle smile, he reassures her, "You will be incredible. We usually do vocals individually in the recording studio, given our busy schedules. I'll make sure it's just us and whatever member is doing the vocals at that moment, one on one to make the process easier for you." He reaches over to caress her cheek, his touch warm and comforting. "I'm excited to have you in the studio with me. It will be a great experience," he adds with genuine enthusiasm. “And getting to spend some time alone with you will be an added bonus.” his voice takes on a low, husky tone that sends butterflies dancing in her stomach.

His eyes drop to her lips, Luna noticing and instinctively tucking her lower lip between her teeth as his fingers thread through her soft dark hair. Her usual wavy hair is poker straight today, her long bangs perfectly framing her delicate face. With a slight tilt of his head, Hongjoong leans in and their lips meet.

It was the first time they’d kissed since their first one in his studio weeks before but also the first time they had been alone. Both being busy with work and like ships passing in the night. In this moment of pure solitude, Hongjoong promises himself to make more time for her.

The kiss is slow and comforting to them both. The outside world around them fading away as they get lost in one another. After what seemed like an eternity, Hongjoong pulls back slightly, his dark eyes searching hers for any sign of hesitation or doubt. “I really missed you.” Hongjoong whispers softly.

Luna's feel a warmth spread through her chest at the way he is looking at her, his eyes filled with affection which she has never seen before from him. She brushes her fingertips against the side of his face. "I missed you too," she replies softly. She leans forwards to capture his lips once more but a firm knock at the door causes them to pull apart harshly. Hongjoong taking a few steps backwards and while Luna quickly fixes her tussled hair from his fingers before saying as calmly as possible, “Come in!”

Both Hongjoong and Luna look towards the door to see Hyunshik walk through the door. His usual mischievous grin on his face as he looks at Luna before spotting Hongjoong at the other side of the room looking at a textbook from Lunas desk in an attempt to look nonchalant.

“Oh hey Hongjoong! Didn’t know you were back at work!” he greets him

“I am not, I came to pick up my laptop then going home. Just wanted to say hi to Luna before I left.” Hongjoong explains

“Ah right.” Hyunshik nods. “Luna, reception called up, your mom has just arrived in the lobby. Ilsung is bringing her up as she has a lot of bags!”

“That will probably be food for everyone!” Luna chuckles. “Thanks for letting me know.”

“I have a meeting to go to so let me know if there is any leftover food!” he replies laughing too

“Oh you can bet on it! I’ll message you first!” she says

“That’s my bestie!” he grins holding his fist out for her to bump

“I got your back!” Luna replies with a smile reciprocating the fist bump

Hongjoong observes their interaction closely, his eyebrow arching slightly at the exchange. Hyunshik gives him a smile before leaving the room. Luna tilts her head, catching the subtle change in Hongjoong's expression. Sensing an unspoken question hanging in the air, she decides to address it directly.

"Is everything alright, Hongjoong?" Luna asks

Hongjoong's demeanour softens as he meets Luna's gaze. "Oh, everything's fine," he reassures her with a small smile. "Just observing the ‘besties’ in action."

Luna chuckles lightly, “Hyun is the only person I’ve made friends with in this place. He keeps bugging me to join the staff hangouts after work but it’s not really my scene.”

“Why not?” he asks

Luna ponders for a moment before responding. She doesn't particularly want to mention that there are certain colleagues like Chaeyoung and Iseul whom she can't stand. Although they don't attend these post-work gatherings, there are some who do that are friendly with them and she doesn’t fully trust them.

“I have enough friends. And with my relationship with you guys I don’t want more people involved in my life. I am a private person in general. With Hyun, we get along. He was the first member of staff to actually talk to me, we have the same sense of humour and I know I would have been friends with him if we’d met elsewhere.” Luna responds. “Does it bother you that we are friends?”

“No!” he answers instantly. “Not at all! I love that you’ve got a friend here! I just wasn’t aware you had been a close friend yet as you don’t really talk about your friendships with members of staff. It didn’t even cross my mind, which I know is bad and comes across like I don’t care.”

“Oh Joongie, I know you care, even when you are busy with work,” Luna reassures him, smiling warmly and reaching for his hand. “I notice the little things you do for me, like filling up my tub with fresh strawberries every day.”

“I didn’t think you knew it was me doing that.” Hongjoong replies, his cheeks blushing.

“I caught you doing it one night when you came home late. I was on my way to the pantry for a midnight snack and saw you in the kitchen.” Luna reveals affectionately.

Hongjoong goes to respond but they hear a noise outside her room door and he quickly lets go of her hand. Ilsung and her mom walk in. Hyunshik wasn’t kidding when he said she had a lot of bags! Ilsung has 6 giant bags of food while her mom is holding 3.

“Apples were my saving grace during my morning sickness with the twins.” her mom shares with Ilsung “I was lucky with Luna and didn’t have any of those symptoms but the twins were a very different story!”

“I’ll definitely pass that on to my wife. She’s tried everything, but the nausea really takes a toll on her at work, and I feel utterly helpless hearing how her day is being affected by it all.” Ilsung responds, a tinge of guilt clouding his tone.

“It is different for all women but giving the apples a shot won’t hurt.” she advises with a warm smile

“Thank you, I’ll grab some on my way back tonight,” Ilsung replies gratefully. “It was truly delightful meeting you, Eunbi.” He flashes a smile at her as Luna and Hongjoong observe quietly.

“You too, Ilsung. I wish you all the best for the future too!” she says “Make sure you take those bags to the others.”

Ilsung bows to her and nods towards Hongjoong before leaving. Luna looks at her mom and feels a bubble of nerves in her tummy. She knows they would talk and sort things out, like they always have done in the past but she was always nervous to have these talks.

“Oh he is such a lovely young man! His poor wife is suffering so badly from morning sickness, such a shame!” her mom says to Luna and Hongjoong

“Hi mom.” Luna says, rubbing at her arm

Hongjoong notices this from the corner of his eye. He longs to reach out and take her hand for reassurance but holds back due to her moms presence. His struggle between desire and restraint becomes apparent to himself as he grapples with his newfound feelings for Luna and his typically reserved demeanour that never allowed him to be openly affectionate – until now, that is. The days they spent apart made him realise how deeply he cares for her.

“Ah Hongjoong! It is lovely to finally meet you!” Lunas mom smiles at him

“You too.” he replies bowing to her

“I brought some food for you boys as well.” she says holding one bag to him “Nothing fancy, just some home cooking I did this morning.”

Luna can’t help but smile. She knew her mom would have been up at the crack of dawn cooking this. One thing she took great pride in was taking care of people and one way of doing that is through cooking. It was one of the many traits Luna got from her mom.

“They are still on holiday, Mom. Joongie was just picking up his laptop.” Luna explains

Her moms eyebrow raises, Luna instantly feels her heart skip a beat at the nickname slipping out. Hongjoong feels her body tense up from beside him and quickly takes the 2 bags from her moms hands.

"Thank you, Mrs. Lee. I'm sure the others will appreciate it," he says with a warm smile. “I am heading back to the apartment now so I’ll make sure the others eat and there will be leftovers for Luna when she returns home tonight too.”

“I’m delighted to see you have such a caring friend Luna! Someone who clearly cares for you.” she smiles as Luna nods trying to remain neutral and hide any hint of her true relationship with Hongjoong from her moms great detective skills. “And please call me Eunbi! My husband is Sam too! Make sure to tell the other boys as I am sure our paths may cross at some point and I hear enough of ‘Mrs Lee’ from my students and Sam hears plenty of ‘Major Lee’ at his job too!!” she adds with a light laugh to Hongjoong

“Of course Mrs L… Eunbi.” he says with a slight wince on his face as he bows again. Luna hides a smile as she knows Hongjoong will be hating calling her by her first name. Lunas mom also picks up on his face and gives Luna is playful wink. “It was lovely to meet you, but I should be going now. I’ll see you tonight Luna.” he adds moving towards the door

“Bye.” Luna says as he walks through it

Her moms voice echoes through the room, mischief lacing her tone. "Bye Joongie!" The door closes behind him just as quickly as her words had left her lips.

"Mom!" Luna protests, a soft laugh escaping her as she lightly nudges her moms shoulder. "That was mean!"

“I live with your dad! I need to get my kicks where I can!” she laughs opening the food containers as they sit down at Lunas desk.

As they settle down to eat, Luna feels another wave of nervous anticipation wash over her. The thought of discussing last night's events twists knots in her stomach.

“You and Hongjoong seem close.” Eunbi observes softly, breaking the silence

“Hongjoong’s been there for me. He has become a… very dear friend to me already.” Luna replies taking a sip from her water bottle.

She looks at her moms expression carefully, uncertain if she is hinting at something more than friendship or merely making an observation.

“He seems to care for you a lot and I like that he does.” Eunbi says with a fond smile “I know you have your core group of friends with Seojun, Nayeon, Jieun and Dasom, and they are wonderful kids but it is nice to see you letting more people into your life.”

After a pause, her mom looks at her with a serious expression. “Luna,” she begins, causing the knot in Lunas stomach returning. Has she saw through her facade of Hongjoong being a friend only? "I owe you an apology for my words last night. I should have approached you privately. I was under the impression that Seonghwa was aware.” she says

"I hadn't found the right moment to tell him yet," Luna admits, her eyes downcast as she focuses on the food in front of her. "I needed more time."

Her mother's voice softens with regret. "I'm truly sorry for forcing you into revealing something so personal before you were prepared."

“I should have told you beforehand not to mention it. But honestly, I didn’t think you would.” Luna says. “However, it was okay. Seonghwa wasn’t freaked out by it.”

“Why would he be?” Eunbi asks, her eyes full of concern as she looks at her daughter

"I’m not ashamed of my bipolar disorder… it just frightens me sometimes," Luna confesses, blinking back impending tears.

“Oh honey!” Her mother immediately sets down her utensils and rounds the table to envelop Luna in a comforting hug. Overwhelmed by emotional exhaustion, Luna sinks into the embrace, releasing all her pent-up emotions.

“It’s okay to be scared from time to time, but never forget how brave you are every day.” her mom says gently, brushing a strand of hair behind Luna's ear.

After taking a few moments to compose herself, she pulls back slightly and looks up at her mom with tear-filled eyes. The sight of her firstborn daughter in such emotional turmoil tore at Eunbi's heart. Like all mothers, the sight of her child in pain was unbearable. Yet, this was a pain she could not erase for Luna, no matter how much she wished she could.

“I don’t like people treating me differently,” Luna admits “and I don’t want to be defined by it.”

Eunbi smiles caringly, dabbing Luna tears away. "You are so much more than any label. Those who truly love and care for you you will understand that."

Luna sniffles, grateful for her moms reassuring words. "I know, Mom. I just... it's hard sometimes."

“I know honey, I know.” she replies stroking her head, “And I know I can make it harder for you, I am overbearing and smothering at times. I am so sorry for that.”

“I know why you are though.” Luna says looking at her mom, “You care a lot and just want the best for me but please just trust me. I understand that is hard given the hell I put you and dad through last year and you’ll probably always worry about me but I know how to look after myself now. I take my medication everyday at the same time, I see my therapist regularly, I practice mindfulness, I talk to my friends when things are tough and go for my morning head clearing runs. I am aware of things now and I am in such a happy place in my life with my job and with… Seonghwa.”

“I can see that. I know that he cares for you deeply, I could see that the second I saw him look at you last night. Hongjoong does as well.” Eunbi says, “Talk to them the way you do with your friends, let them in and allow them to help.”

“Hongjoong knows about my diagnosis but I don’t know how to tell the others. I’ve built up such a protective wall around myself regarding my diagnosis.” her voice falters slightly, “First thing I said to them when I moved in, was not to fuss over me with my allergies, don’t ask me how I am, or treat me different and speaking to Hongjoong this afternoon, I realised that I’ve made them all on edge with that. They are too worried to do those things now. I want to let them in, be closer to each of them but I don’t know how to without being guarded.”Another stray tear falls from Luna eye as her lip wobbles.

Eunbi looks carefully at her daughter, seeing the conflict in her face but also picking up on the way she is mentioning to the others. It is clear to her that Luna cares for more than just Seonghwa and Hongjoong.

“You have been little Miss Independent since you learned to walk! Wouldn’t let your father or I help you.” Eunbi smiles gently “Your health conditions have made you more guarded, which is understandable. However, don't let it prevent you from opening up to all of them and allow them to be there for you.”

Luna shifts in her seat, the hesitation evident in her voice as she takes a deep breath. “What if they see me differently? As a weak fragile person.”

“Oh my dear Younha,” Eunbi's words are filled with affection, speaking her birth name with a softness that catches Luna off guard but reassures her deeply, “opening up doesn’t make you weak. It takes strength to be vulnerable, to trust others with your heart and I know they will take care of you, all of them!”

Luna feels more tears welling up in her eyes as she looks at her mom, thankful for her. "I don't want to push them away," Luna admits, her voice barely above a whisper.

Eunbi smiles and replies, "Then don't. Let them in one step at a time, at your own pace, show them your true self - vulnerabilities and all. They care about you more than you realise, and together, you can all support each other through anything life throws your way."

A sense of peace washes over Luna's chest as she nods slowly, a glimmer of courage shining through. Luna knows her mom is beginning to understand the depth of her relationships. “Thank you mom!”

“I love you so so much honey.” Eunbi says kissing the top of Lunas head and hugging her once more.

“I love you too mom.” Luna replies

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Luna walks through the door and instantly can hear the buzz of activity in the apartment. Her face breaks into a smile; it's good to have everyone home. She takes off her coat and hangs it up before slipping off her sneakers. Suddenly a pair of strong arms wrap around her from behind, lifting her effortlessly off the ground. Surprised and delighted, a playful scream escapes Luna's mouth. She feels warm breath against her neck, accompanied by a tender kiss that ignites a spark within her. In that moment, she knows exactly who it is.

"Wooyoung!" she giggles, turning to face him with gleeful arms wrapped tightly around his shoulders. His cheeky grin mirrors her own excitement.

“Miss me?” he asks playfully

Luna smirks, a mischievous glint in her eyes. "Not really," she teases, barely able to contain her amusement. "I barely noticed you were gone!"

“Oh wow, that hurts!” he says pretending to be upset “Maybe I won’t give you any kisses then!” he grins

“Ha! I’d like to see you try to go a night without trying to kiss me!” she laughs in reply

In truth she missed him and he had missed her too. They all had but playful banter and teasing were Luna and Wooyoungs first instincts with one another.

“Just you see me succeed with that!” he replies

“Okay Mr Jung! Lets see how long you last!” she says, pulling away from him “I wonder if San is home yet…”

“Oh hell no, he isn’t getting kisses before me!” he pouts, holding onto her arm and pulling her back into his body again. “Not when I’ve been waiting by the door for nearly an hour for you to come home!” his lips capture hers as she lets out a muffled giggle

She throws her arms around his shoulders once more and kisses him back, happy to have him close to her once again but also secretly enjoying that he didn’t even last 10 seconds. His hands slip down to her rear, gently squeezing it as he pulls her even closer.

“Did you miss me though?” he asks, pulling back. Luna can see his eyes are serious.

“Of course I did Woo.” she replies softly. “A lot!”

“Good!” he smiles, placing another kiss on her lips. “As much as I want to pick you up, take you to my room and keep you all to myself for the rest of the night, we should go see the others.”

As Wooyoung and Luna walk into the kitchen, Seonghwa and Yunho are in there. Seonghwa is cleaning the cooker while Yunho is sitting at the kitchen island. Luna goes straight to Yunho and hugs him causing him to smile and pull her onto his lap sideways. He places his lips on hers while leaning her backwards, holding onto her tightly so she doesn’t fall as she laughs lightly. Luna is pleased to see how confident he is being at showing affection for her in front of the others now and she knows their night together has definitely made them closer. He gently pulls her upright, pulling back from the kiss but still keeping her close to him.

“Someones in a good mood.” she teases playfully as her hands play with the fabric of his hoodie.

"Just happy to have you home," Yunho replies contentedly, savouring the soft kisses she plants on his cheek, a chuckle escaping his lips.

Luna settles comfortably into Yunho's lap, feeling his warm embrace around her. But as she leans against him, she senses a presence lingering nearby. Turning her head, she catches sight of Seonghwa standing a few feet away with a gentle smile on his lips as he looks on at them. Sensing Luna's silent acknowledgement, Yunho eases his hold on her, silently granting her permission to approach Seonghwa if she desires. Grateful that Yunho has picked up on this, Luna pecks his cheek before gliding over to Seonghwa, who meticulously removes his cleaning gloves.

“How was your day?” Seonghwa asks leaning down to hug her

"Surprisingly good," Luna replies happily looking up at him, a shadow of her previous night's weariness erased. Seonghwa notices the visible transformation in Luna, putting his earlier concerns to rest.

"That's what I like to hear, darling." A warm smile plays on his lips, reflecting his genuine relief. She goes on her tip toes to place a kiss on his lips before resting her head on his shoulder.

As Luna and Seonghwa share a moment, everyone can hear the loud footsteps of someone rushing down the stairs. Luna pulls away from Seonghwa, turning her head towards the sound. Her eyes light up as she recognises the familiar figure stepping into the room.

“Ah my princess is finally home!” Mingis deep voice booms through the kitchen as he enters. Seonghwa lets go of Luna so she can go to Mingi as he watches on fondly.

“Mingi!” she smiles widely. As Mingi lifts Luna into his arms, spinning her around, she giggles and murmurs into his ear, "I missed you today."

"Missed you too," he replies gently, setting her back down on the floor and planting a kiss on her forehead. "Brought me any treats today?"

Luna feigns indignation, rolling her eyes playfully. "What do you think?! Of course I did! I got you cookies today."

As Mingis eyes light up at the mention of the cookies, Wooyoung chimes in “Hey! What about me? Am I not getting any treats?” he pouts

“You just got kisses, isn’t that a treat?” she laughs poking his side

“I mean kisses are great but a man needs his snacks too you know!” he replies, grabbing her waist and tickling her gently

“Woo, don’t!” she shrieks with laughter trying to get away from him

Luna's heart races as she tries to escape Wooyoung, who chases her around the spacious kitchen. Their laughter echoes around the room as Seonghwa, Yunho and Mingi look at them with smiles on their faces at the playful scene. As she runs around the kitchen island her soft socks causes her to slip on the hardwood flooring. Wooyoung tries to grab her to stop her while Yunho who was second closest to her jumps from his seat on the bar stool to catch her. However their attempts are in vain as Luna hits the floor with a loud thud.

“Oh shit Luna, I am so sorry!” Wooyoung says the first to reach her

Lying flat on on her, Luna can’t help but laugh again as she looks up at the ceiling with the 4 men surrounding her on the floor. At this point Hongjoong enters the kitchen.

“What happened?” he asks, a smile on his face at hearing Lunas joyful laughter

“Luna fell over.” Yunho replies

“Oh god!” he says, his smile dropping. He rushes over, nudging Wooyoung out the way to get to her side.

“Are you okay?” Seonghwa asks Luna, concern in his voice

“I am fine!” she manages to reply, trying to suppress her laughter.

“Are you sure?” Mingi asks, his eyes big and round as he looks down at her

“You fell really hard, little one!” Yunho says reaching out to help her

“Really guys, I’m fine!” Despite her assurance, Wooyoung stands off to the side biting his lip nervously, guilt weighing heavily on him. Mingi and Yunho help her up while Hongjoong supports her arm. "I'm surprised it took me this long to fall in front of you all! I am super clumsy on my feet."

Out of the corner of her eye she notices Wooyoung lingering in the background, his face clouded with worry. Guilt hitting him that his actions could have really hurt her. Instantly her laughter stops and she moves from Yunhos hold to go to Wooyoung.

“Hey.” she whispers, cupping his cheek, “I am okay, I promise you!”

"I could've hurt you," he mumbles, not meeting her gaze.

"But you didn't. My clumsy self has fallen over countless times before, so I think my body has developed some kind of resistance to injury by now." She tries to lighten the mood with a joke.

A small smile tugs at Wooyoung's lips as he finally looks at her, relieved that she's alright. Luna can’t resist leaning forwards and hugging him, feeling relief when he hugs her back tightly.

"I fall over my own two feet, I have a habit of dropping things, and sometimes I possess the ability to break objects just by casting my gaze upon them.” She looks over at her other boyfriends. "I've been trying my best to contain it around you guys," she continues, "but I think it's safe to say that Clumsy Luna has finally made her appearance. Brace yourselves for what's to come!"

Yunho chuckles, his eyes crinkling in amusement. "So what you're saying is we need to baby proof the apartment?"

Luna's laughter mingles with theirs, a token of gratitude for their light-heartedness in the face of the situation. Wooyoung leans in, his lips brushing a soft kiss against her temple, sending her heart into a flutter. Turning to him, she finds a gentle smile meant only for her. Drawn to him, she meets his lips in a tender kiss.

"San, Yeosang, and Jongho have collected the food," announces Hongjoong, glancing at a message on his phone.

"We've almost finished setting up. Mingi and I need to grab some drinks from the store quickly," Seonghwa adds.

"I'll get changed," Luna replies, gently extricating herself from Wooyoung's hold. He places a parting kiss on her forehead before releasing her. "Hongjoong, Seonghwa, can we talk privately?" she adds quietly

“Of course. Lets go into the lounge.” Hongjoong replies

The trio retreats into the lounge as Yunho watches them leave. Curiosity tugs at him, but he respects Luna's need for privacy.

“I wanted to thank you both for being so understanding.” Luna begins as they sit on the sofa, Luna in the middle of them. “The last 24 hours have been a lot for you Seonghwa. Your support and non-judgement means a lot.”

“There is no need to thank us darling.” Seonghwa says

“How did things go with your mom this afternoon?” Hongjoong asks, showing concern

“We talked it out, things are back to normal again.” Luna answers, “I’ve decided not to tell the others yet. I know I said to you earlier that I would but honestly, last night was hard enough. Not ready to go through that again so soon with 6 other men.” she continues, "If your offer to support me until I'm ready still stands, I'd be grateful."

“Of course it is, baby!” Hongjoong reassures her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pressing a comforting kiss to her cheek.

Seonghwas eyes widen slightly at the sudden display of affection Hongjoong is showing. It isn’t something he has seen from his oldest friend and leader, nor has he ever seen him be affectionate with a woman ever! It was a running joke within the group that as soon as a female is in close proximity Hongjoong will be as far away as possible.

"We'll both be here for you, as much as you'll let us," Hongjoong promises.

"That's what I wanted to discuss too. I'm going to allow you all to fuss over me, for those who want to," Luna says, managing a smile.

"Really? We don't want to make you uncomfortable," Seonghwa cautions gently.

"There's a difference between showing concern and being overbearing. I think I was conflating the two. I want us all to have an open relationship—that includes letting you all care for me." Luna abruptly adds, "I want to tell Yunho about my bipolar."

"Are you sure?" Hongjoong asks, his hand cradling her cheek with care.

“The hiding has caused me gut-wrenching anxiety and Yunho’s noticed. I know he is worried about me.” she answers, “The other night we opened up to one another and I want him to know.”

She feels a small heat flash across her cheeks, wondering if Hongjoong and Seonghwa know what she truly means by that. Seonghwa had a sense their relationship had progressed to this stage, due to Yunhos recent displays of affection and now Lunas words only confirmed it for him and he is genuinely happy for them both.

“Do you want to do it now or leave it until later?” Seonghwa asks in a gentle tone

"It's better to do it now before everyone else returns. We won't have another quiet moment like this for a long time.” she says with determination

Hongjoong nods in agreement before slipping away to fetch Yunho from the kitchen. Luna seizes the moment to snuggle into Seonghwa, who warmly welcomes her embrace.

“How are you holding up?” he asks softly

“Good.” she smiles

Moments later Yunho and Hongjoong come back into the lounge, both sitting on the sofa beside Luna and Seonghwa.

“Is everything okay?” Yunho asks calmly, his voice reassuring.

“There is something we need to discuss before the others get home.” Hongjoong discloses as Yunho nods

Before Seonghwa opens his mouth to tell Yunho what is going on, Luna starts to speak. She knew it had to be her to say the words.

“Yunho, I have bipolar disorder. I was diagnosed at the beginning of last year during a very dark period of my life. My recent heightened anxiety has been caused due to the pressure I was putting on myself to keep it hidden from you all.” she says. Yunho nods and taking a moment to process the information. “Hongjoong has known for a while and Seonghwa found out last night from my mom. That is why we returned home earlier than expected.”

"Is that why you were so quiet last night too?" he asks gently, to which she responds with a nod. The way Seonghwa was looking at Luna, she was so quiet and subdued when they got home, not her usual bubbly self then falling asleep so suddenly - it all made sense to Yunho now.

“I am sorry for keeping it from you…” she begins

"No need to apologise. I'm just glad you trust me enough to share this with me," he reassures her, reaching for her hands which she gladly accepts.

“I feel bad dropping this on you out the blue and not being able to talk properly about it but I promise you we can talk more in depth tomorrow, or another day if you want. I will answer all of your questions,” she says, “yours too Seonghwa.” she adds looking back at him as he smiles in return.

“All I need to know tonight little one, is if you are okay.” Yunho says, his fingers tenderly squeezing her hand

"I truly am. Our talk the other night, Hongjoong and Seonghwa's reassurance today, and my talk with my mom this afternoon has lifted the crushing weight that has been on my chest for weeks.” Luna takes a small deep breath before a gentle smile lights up her face making Yunho heart skip a beat, “I feel like I can finally breathe."

Hongjoong observes Luna's change in demeanour with a smile. “I am glad.”

"Also Luna has now given us permission to fuss," Seonghwa interjects with a playful grin at Yunho.

“Finally!!” Yunho breaks into a smile, “Just wait until Wooyoung and San find out!”

The room fills with laughter as relief washes over them all.

"I should change out of these work clothes," Luna announces after the laughter subsides, still glowing with happiness. "Thank you all for everything! If only I could hug all three of you at once!"

"No need for wishes—group hug time!" Yunho declares, pulling everyone into an embrace despite Hongjoong's protests, causing Luna to laugh.

After the laughter subsides, Luna extricates herself from the group hug, her face still flushed with joy. “Alright, I really need to change now,” she says, her voice filled with warmth

With a quick smile she’s off, leaving the room with a sense of lightness that belies the pain beginning to creep into her side. Once safely inside her bedroom, she takes a deep breath and rubs her hip where a dull ache lingers. She's managed to hide her discomfort, not wanting to worry the others—especially Wooyoung. There was no need to let them know, she was only slightly sore, nothing major. She collects fresh clothes before retreating into her bathroom to wash away the remnants of the day and enjoy her night with her boyfriends.

In the kitchen Wooyoung and Hongjoong are sorting the plates and cutlery. Hongjoong can sense Wooyoung still feels bad about what happened. As worried as Hongjoong was when he found her on the floor and hearing she had fell over, he knew it was an accident and he wasn’t mad at Wooyoung.

“Luna’s tougher than she looks.” Hongjoong says casually, trying to ease his worries but not make a big deal about it.

“I know, but it is still my fault she fell over. I was playing around with her.” he sighs, remorse clear in his voice as he opens the cupboard door and begins to retrieve the glasses. “I am responsible for her fall.”

“She wasn’t injured though.” Hongjoong says

Wooyoung nods, knowing he is right but still feeling a sense of unease lingering within him. “I just want her to feel safe with me,” he admits quietly, “not frightened that I might harm her.”

Hongjoong feels his stomach drop a little at hearing this, he places a reassuring hand on Wooyoungs shoulder. “She won’t feel that way! Luna understands accidents happen and she has told us how clumsy she is. She is a tough little cookie, she can handle a tumble now and then.”

“Thanks Hongjoong. To be honest I was bracing myself for a scolding from you, I wasn’t expecting this.” Wooyoung says with a small smile of relief on his face as they move into the lounge

“Captain mode will be activated tomorrow!” Hongjoong laughs lightly, glad to see his friend is feeling less burdened.

As they continue to set up the coffee table Mingi and Seonghwa return from the store. They have bought extra snacks with the drinks. At the same time Luna emerges from her room dressed in a pair of cream sweats with a long lilac coloured sweatshirt. Seonghwa can’t help but notice how content and comfortable she looks tonight. Immediately she goes to Wooyoung and hugs him close, wanting to give him extra reassure for earlier. He relaxes into her embrace, his arms loosely wrapping around her waist.

“I’m truly sorry about earlier.” he whispers into her ear

“No more apologies.” she smiles softly pulling her head back from his neck to look at him, her fingers running through his soft black hair. “Now where are my Woo kisses?” she asks with a playful glint in her big brown eyes that cause him to melt a little

“I’ll give you all the kisses you want, lil cutie.” he smiles back at her before capturing her lips

The warmth of Wooyoung's lips against hers sends a shiver down Luna's spine. She melts into his embrace, her heart racing with joy. One of his hands slowly travels down her back, before sliding under the soft fabric of her sweatshirt to feel the warmth of her skin beneath it. Luna smiles softly into the kiss as she tastes the light minty flavour on his tongue from the gum he must have been chewing earlier. As their lips separate Wooyoung leaves a series of playful pecks along her jaw and into her neck as she giggles lightly.

From the doorway, Hongjoong observes the intimate scene with a satisfied smile. He feels a wave of relief seeing Luna's radiant happiness and the dissipation of Wooyoung's worries. His eyes meet Seonghwa's as he passes by en route to the kitchen.

“He is whipped for Luna.” he says lowly, nodding his head towards the pair causing Hongjoong to chuckle.

“Aren’t we all!” Hongjoong simply replies following him

The mellow chime signalling the arrival of San, Yeosang, and Jongho with food pulls Luna and Wooyoung from their bubble. With playful cheekiness, Wooyoung lightly pats Luna's rear and disentangles himself from her.

“You should go see San, I know the mans been eager to see you since he came home.” he smiles at her

“You sure?” she asks him as he nods, wanting to make sure he was okay with her going to San. “Okay, save a spot for me beside you!”

“I’ll make sure I get us one of the corners so we have more space then can go into the corner of the sofa when we are finished eating.” he replies, feeling a flutter in his stomach at Luna wanting to be beside him for the rest of the night.

“Could you go into my room and get my blanket for us to cuddle under?” she asks as San and Jongho come into the lounge with the pizza boxes and food containers. “It is on the chair at my desk.”

“Of course I will.” he replies, pecking her lips before letting her go

Luna makes her way over to San who quickly puts the boxes on the coffee table before grabbing her into his arms. It was clear to see by Wooyoung and Mingi who looked on that San had missed Luna a lot, as she had with him. Wooyoung goes into her bedroom to collect her blanket while the others start to come into the lounge.

“It feels like I haven’t seen you in forever, sunshine!” San smiles lifting her up into his arms

“We face timed this morning when I got to work!” she laughs

“Not the same as seeing you, face to face, being to cuddle you,” he hums “ and kiss you again.” he mumbles quietly looking into her eyes

A smile tugs at Luna's lips as she leans in to give him a tender kiss. "I missed you so much," he murmurs against her lips.

"Me too," she replies with a content sigh, happy to see him and that everyone is back home again.

San gives her another kiss, carefully putting her back on the ground, his hands moving to her waist to keep her body close to his, pressing his forehead against her with his eyes closed. Luna's delicate fingers glide through his blond hair, the golden strands starting to reveal darker roots underneath. Wooyoung returns with the blanket in hand, a soft smile playing on his lips as he watches the scene unfold.

“Is everyone ready to eat?” Jongho says coming back into the lounge, his eyes resting on the couple.

“Absolutely, I am starving!” Yeosang says coming in behind him

San and Luna pull away from one another, San letting go of her waist. Before making her way over to Yeosang she softly kisses Sans cheek. It seems kisses were on the cards for everyone at this point as Yeosang is next in line. Jongho can only watch on as he goes to sit on the floor, wanting to hug her too but feeling too awkward.

“It is so nice to have everyone back home again!” Seonghwa says sitting beside Jongho, his legs stretched out under the coffee table and his back resting against the sofa

“Oh I am so looking forward to this tonight!” Luna smiles as she sits on the floor beside Wooyoung. He instantly pulls her onto his lap, wrapping her blanket over them both and puts his arm around her. His nose nuzzles into her neck, kissing the skin making her smile more.

“Before we get fully settled into our night, I have some good news for you all.” Hongjoong says as he comes into the lounge

His announcement commands attention. The room falls silent as everyone turns to face him, curiosity piqued.

"Once we return from LA, we'll begin working on our new Japanese song and album," he reveals, "Luna will be joining us for the translations and pronunciation!"

The room erupts into loud excitement as Luna can only blush and hide her face into Wooyoungs chest.

Mingi grins broadly. "I was hoping you'd be part of it!"

San adds his own praise. "We couldn't ask for a better translator or pronunciation guide for this album."

Luna peeks out at the others from Wooyoungs chest. “Thanks guys. I honestly shouldn’t be anywhere near a recording studio or associated with it in anyway as I sound like a dying cat and I am completely tone deaf! However, languages and translations are my speciality so I will work extra hard for you all.”

“Just be yourself, don’t stress yourself out over it. You are amazing at what you do and we have complete faith in your skills.” Seonghwa says

“I spent most of today doing the song translations from Korean and Japanese and over the next week I’ll be working with Hongjoong and Mingi on their lyrics for the new song.”

Mingi gasps dramatically. "So you already know which songs are on the album?"

She nods, amused by his reaction. "Based on your surprise, I'm guessing you didn't?"

Jongho interjects eagerly. "Which songs?"

"Cyberpunk and New World," she reveals, then frowns slightly. "You guys really didn't know? Was I not supposed to tell you yet?"

"Don't worry, Luna. I'm sure Eden planned to tell us tomorrow." Hongjoong laughs easing her concern she had revealed something she shouldn’t have “We will all just act surprised when he does!”

“I am slightly nervous as I’ve never translated something so important before but I am also excited to see the whole process. See you all recording too.” she says

“We are thrilled to have you working with us on our music. But even if you weren’t involved in a professional level, we would still have wanted you there for it.” Jongho says from the opposite side of the sofa. His gaze holds hers, a genuine smile on his face that makes her heart flutter.

“Absolutely!” Yunho agrees, “Now lets dig into the food before it gets cold!”

The guys begin to open the pizza boxes as Luna feels Wooyoungs arm around her tighten, his fingers playing with the fabric of her sweatshirt. “It is going to be awesome, jagiya.” he whispers kissing her softly

“Dear god Wooyoung, let Luna breath! You’ve had your lips attached to hers since she got home!” Mingi teases with a chuckle

Grinning mischievously, Wooyoung fires back, "Oh please, Mingi. You're just jealous that she wants my lips tonight and not yours!" Laughter fills the room.

“I had lots of Luna kisses while you were away!” Mingi replies with a smirk

“Oh my god!” Luna groans dramatically, rolling her eyes but unable to conceal the smile tugging at her lips.

“Guys maybe we should take it down a notch,” Yunho interjects gently, mindful of Luna's comfort. After she confided in him about her insecurities, he was extra cautious not to escalate any teasing that might make her feel uneasy. Concerned that the route the conversation was going down could lead to that situation, he wanted to slow it down now.

“It is cool.” Luna says smiling over at Yunho, letting him know she was fine with the current level of banter. “Woo just needs extra attention tonight, isn’t that right little baby!” she adds playfully looking at Wooyoung as he pouts back at her causing her to peck his lips as the others continue to laugh

As everyone begins to start taking the food and pouring drinks, Jongho's gaze remains fixated on Luna and Wooyoung, who seem to be lost in a little bubble of their own. He observes as Wooyoung leans in close and whispers something into Luna's ear, earning a sweet giggle from her before she gently hits his arm playfully and places a tender kiss on his cheek, and Jongho can't help but envy the easy intimacy between them.

His chest feels heavy, aching to embrace her closely like Wooyoung is, to share whispered conversations that light up her face with joy, and to feel the warmth of her lips on his cheeks

He felt the same way when he saw San kissing her, Yeosang too. It wasn’t jealousy he felt towards the others, far from it. Just a sense of longing that fills his heart as he yearns for a connection like theirs – to hold Luna close, whisper into her ear, and make her laugh effortlessly. The accidental closeness they shared last night, when Luna fell asleep on his shoulder, only amplified these desires.

Just as Jongho contemplates his own desires for Luna to reciprocate his feelings, their eyes meet. His head screams to look away, fearing that she might see the intensity in his gaze and feel uncomfortable by it. However he finds himself incapable of turning away, captivated by Luna's radiant smile and the adorable scrunch of her nose as she winks at him. In that moment of a shared moment between just the two of them, the heavy weight on his chest evaporates into a comforting warmth that spreads throughout his entire body. Unable to resist, he returns her smile, recognising the unspoken connection they are having.

“Luna, we went to that vegetarian place you told me about the other day so we could get you the tteokbokki you love.” Yeosang says handing the food container to her

“Ooooh!” Hongjoong exclaims, his eyes widening at the sight of it. Memories flood back of Luna bringing him some tteokbokki on the day she visited his studio for lunch, and how delicious it was.

“You want some?” Luna asks him with a grin on her face

“N-no!” he stammers, “That is your food. The guys got it for only you.” but Luna catches his longing glance at the food

Luna rolls her eyes playfully and picks up an empty bowl, she tips some into it and leans over Wooyoung passing it to Hongjoong who is sitting beside him.

“Just take it or I will get annoyed with you!” she says with a hint of teasing in her voice as Hongjoong shakes his head at the offering

“Thank you Luna.” he smiles appreciatively at the sharing of her food

“What exactly does vegetarian tteokbokki taste like?” Wooyoung curiously asks

“According to my friend Nayeon, who hates anything vegetarian it is exactly like proper tteokbokki. Obviously I can’t confirm that since I’ve never had it with fish cakes or fish sauce.” Luna answers holding a rice cake up for him to eat

“Well I can confirm it does and it is amazing!” Hongjoong smiles passing it around the others to try

“Wah! It does!!” Wooyoung exclaims in surprise and enthusiasm after trying the dish.

The others all chime in, quickly polishing off the portion Luna has passed to Hongjoong.

"BBT sent us some clips of the choreo they’ve been working on for the tour," Yunho beams. "It looks really good!"

“I took a quick look at it earlier. It is definitely going to be challenging, but we will nail it with practice.” Mingi replies, nodding in agreement

"Cyberpunk is shaping up to be quite the spectacle from that sneak peek!" Yeosang grins. "I think it will leave a lasting impression!"

Luna’s ear prick up at this, wondering what he could mean by it. She chews slowly on the pizza in her mouth as she ponders it.

“Yeah, the surprise element in this choreography will for sure blow everyone away! I can’t wait to see the full routine tomorrow and get started on it.” Wooyoung exclaims eagerly

Luna couldn't contain her curiosity any longer and blurts out, "What kind of element?"

"Oh, you'll just have to wait and see, little one! I have a feeling you in particular will appreciate it!" Yunho teases with a sly grin, causing Mingi to chuckle and adding to Luna's intrigue.

"Make sure you swing by the practice room after lunchtime so you can witness it firsthand." Wooyoung joins in with the teasing pulling her closer

“Okay, I haven’t watched the clips yet but now I want to know what this is too!” Jongho interjects, his own curiosity setting in as the others laugh

The group continues to chat as they eat all the food until they were all full. Luna stayed on Wooyoungs lap the entire time, happy being close to him and not feeling awkward around the others either. Sharing her fears with Yunho, receiving reassurance from Yeosang the next day, the previous day's events, Seonghwa's supportive response and the heart-to-heart with her mom, Luna finally feels completely relaxed and unburdened. She knows that the day will come really soon where she needs to reveal her bipolar disorder to the rest of the guys but she is no longer scared for that moment now.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Taglist: @kiwibaekie @fudgeflyssworld @kodzukein @elk-1998 @khjcoo @pepperony-7 @ateez-babygirl @starillusion13 @stephy-nicole13 @truthbehindthereflection @livingdeadlisa @stayteezdreams @atinyapple1117

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hwaberry-dreams · 1 month

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✨ Chapter 19 of Utopia is nearly finished. I had an essay for uni to focus on at the start of this month. Also the usual mom and home life to deal with too! I am planning to get chapter 19 published either Saturday night or Sunday morning though. ✨

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hwaberry-dreams · 2 months

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Hi who's your ateez bias?

Seonghwa and Yunho

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hwaberry-dreams · 2 months

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EIGHTEEN: first impressions and revelations

Warnings: mentions of mental health disorder, mention of self harm scars

Word count: 9k

Summary: Seonghwa meets Lunas parents, the meeting goes well until her mom accidentally causes a fuss. It forces Luna to open up to Seonghwa and leaves her feeling drained but someone unexpected offers their support during this difficult moment.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

(A/N: this chapter will have a 3rd person POV towards the end. I want to start incorporating Ateez thoughts and actions instead of solely Lunas. I will switch between Luna and 3rd person from this point onwards. I would appreciate any feedback on this, good or bad so feel free to message me)

Seonghwa and I arrive at my parents' apartment, laughter already echoing through the door from within, it dawns on me that a relationship isn't just about finding someone who fits perfectly into your life. It's about creating a space for each other, intertwining routines and quirks, and embracing the journey with open hearts. I felt like I could have that with the guys but I also knew I could never ever allow my feelings for them to develop into love or anything near that.

My parents' relationship began in a unique way, their bond forged through circumstances yet blossoming into true love. I grew up witnessing their resilience as they overcame every obstacle thrown their way - from my father's long and difficult tours of duty, to my mother's constant packing and moving with little notice. My mom making sure I had the best childhood she could possible give me. Despite their opposing views and frequent disagreements on most topics, their love is unbreakable and together they are an unstoppable force. I always dreamt of finding that same kind of love with someone someday.

The feeling of Seonghwas fingers tighten subtly in mine pulls me from my thoughts and I look up at him.

"Are you definitely sure we shouldn't have brought flowers for your mom?" he asks me and I can see a flicker of nerves in his eyes

"Absolutely. She isn't a big fan of flowers. She only likes them for decoration and not as a gift. Wine is always a winner with her and the chocolates are for my dad." I answer. "If you think I have a massive sweet tooth, you are about to see exactly where I get it from!"

"Should I refer to your dad as Major Lee?" he asks

"It isn't necessary at all. My dad is not old school military where he expects everyone to call him by his rank or even as sir outside of his work." I say "He is incredibly laid back so don't worry!"

With a steady hand, I reach up to the doorbell and give it a firm push. The door swings open a split second later with a gentle creak and my mom greets us with a warm smile.

"Oh hello!!" she says as if we have arrived unexpected and she hasn't been camped out at the door waiting for our arrival. "Come in, come in!" she opens the door fully and ushers us in. We slip off our shoes and enter the inviting space of the lounge, where my dad stands up from the sofa, his expression stoic. My mom joins him, her smile never faltering, while my dad's eyes scan over Seonghwa with an unreadable look. The air is filled with a mix of anticipation and tension.

I briefly look at Seonghwa who is holding eye contact but I can see he looks nervous. I introduce, "This is Seonghwa."

He greets them politely with a bow, "Hello, Major Lee and Mrs. Lee."

"You can just call us Sam and Eunbi," my mom responds with a warm smile. "Gosh you are more handsome in real life!!" she adds before hugging him suddenly. I can see he is caught off guard, I should have warned him she is a hugger. However I've never seen her hug a boyfriend ever! "You two look so cute together, with your couple outfits!" my mom says pulling back from Seonghwa.

"Not couple outfit, we just happened to be wearing the same colours." I say

"Well that just shows how in tune you are with one another!" she smiles widely

"Is that a box of chocolates I see?" my dad says with a small smile on his face, spotting the gift bag in Seonghwa's hand. He has a knack for detecting chocolate from miles away. I can see he is trying to remain in scary dad mode but with the prospect of his beloved chocolate he cannot keep up the facade and I have to suppress a giggle.

"Yes sir." Seonghwa replies, handing them over to him

"Seonghwa also picked out a bottle of wine for you, Mom." I say

"Oh you didn't need to do that! Thank you Seonghwa." she smiles at him "Dinner will be served soon so make yourself comfortable!" she adds

"Please, have a seat Seonghwa," my dad invites him to the decorated dining table, adorned with fresh flowers and flickering candles. My mom has gone all out for this dinner tonight!

With a gentle hand on my back, Seonghwa guides me to the table and pulls out a chair for me. I catch a faint smile of approval from my dad. It was one of his classic tests, something he's done with all of my previous boyfriends. He wants to see if Seonghwa is traditional and a gentleman, helping me sit before taking a seat himself. I didn't bother mentioning the test to Seonghwa. He always pulls out my chair for me, unless one of the other guys beats him to it. I had no doubt he would pass this test with flying colours.

“I've made a cottage pie, I hope that's alright with you, Seonghwa,” my mom says, looking at him.

“Of course,” he replies, nodding and remaining standing by the table.

“Oh, that's a relief!” my mom sighs. “I'll go check on it.”

"Take a seat." my dad nods towards him.

I know Seonghwa was waiting for my parents to sit first before he did. He takes a seat next to me and pulls his chair closer to the table.

“What exactly is a... cottage pie?” he leans in and whispers to me as my dad heads into the kitchen to assist my mom. His eyes hold a look of confusion, causing me to giggle. Unable to resist, I kiss his lips.

“It's minced beef mixed with gravy and topped with mashed potatoes. My mom adds carrots, peas and onions to hers. It's really delicious,” I explain with a smile. "You will like it!"

“Well that does sound delicious,” he responds with a smile of his own.

"My moms cooking is so good!" I murmur with a smile, nodding in agreement.

Seonghwa leans towards me. "If your moms cooking is anything like yours, I have no doubt that I'll love it." His lips meet mine in a sweet kiss, and I can't help but smile at the gesture. I respond with just as much affection, savouring the moment as his hand delicately cups my face.

"My wife and daughter have impeccable culinary skills," my dad's voice interrupts us, causing Seonghwa to jump back and letting go of me. My dad stands there, holding two glasses of wine in hand and a playful smirk on his face as he catches Seonghwa kissing me. Knowing how traditional Seonghwa is, I can see the blush creeping onto his cheeks.

I can't help but laugh as my dad's mischievous side starts to show. It's a good sign, but I'm not sure how Seonghwa will react to it during our first meeting. After all, my dad has a unique sense of humour.

His eyes twinkle playfully as he walks over to the dining table and sets down the glasses in front of us.

"Honey, don't tease the poor boy," my mom scolds with a grin while placing two more glasses on the table. "Seonghwa, please ignore my husband. He thinks he's funnier than he actually is."

"How dare you!" My dad gasps dramatically, clutching his chest. "I'll have you know that everyone at work thinks I'm the funniest Major on base!"

"Oh honey, that's only because they're afraid of you!" My mom lightly taps his shoulder. "If they don't laugh, you'll make them do 100 laps around the base."

"Well, I never!" My dad sighs theatrically.

I can see Seonghwa begin to relax a bit as he watches my parents' playful banter. But his shoulders are still tense. Under the table, I reach for his hand to give him some reassurance.

"Why don't you be useful and help me with the plates?" My mom suggests with a laugh.

"I can help." Seonghwa offers, standing up from his seat.

"You will do no such thing! You are a guest here and your only job is to eat and drink!" my mom insists, playfully pulling my dad's arm back into the kitchen.

"Sorry about that, my dad loves to joke around," I say with a smile as Seonghwa settles back into his seat.

"It's fine. I just felt a little uncomfortable that your dad caught us," he responds, sheepishly smiling.

"I know but don't worry about it. The fact that my dad is joking around with you means he likes you," I reassure him. "So don't feel awkward." I squeeze his hand before bringing it to my lips to kiss the back of it.

Seonghwas cheeks flush a little as he takes a deep breath and smiles back at me looking more relaxed. My parents start to bring in plates of food. We each have a large portion of cottage pie on our plates with bowls of vegetables, salad, rice and ramen in the middle to help ourselves to. I notice Seonghwas eyes grow a bit bigger at the sheer amount of food available.

"This looks delicious!" he says as my parents take their places at the table.

The aroma of my moms delicious cooking fills the dining room, making my mouth water in anticipation. It has been so long since I had her cooking. I glance at Seonghwa, and see his eyes shining with excitement.

"Well help yourselves!" my mom smiles gesturing to the food.

I notice her keen gaze fixed on Seonghwa as he takes his first bite of the cottage pie. He must be aware of her scrutiny, but he adeptly conceals it with a nonchalant expression.

"Wow, this is absolutely delicious!" Seonghwa's eyes widen in delight and I can tell he truly means it. He has always been a lover of food, savouring each and every flavour with an almost childlike enthusiasm.

"Oh I am glad!" My moms shoulders visibly relax as she takes a bite of her own food. I know she was anxious for Seonghwa to enjoy the meal she prepared for him.

As we all continue to enjoy our meal, the conversation flows effortlessly. My dad, always the entertainer, begins to regale us with a funny story from his younger days.

"So there I was, trying to impress your mom on our first date," he chuckles, his eyes glinting mischievously. I knew he was going to tell this story because he takes every opportunity he can get to tell it and honestly I love hearing it each time. "I took her to this fancy restaurant and thought I was being all smooth, ordering the most expensive bottle of wine on the menu. Little did I know that Eunbi couldn't stand the taste of it!"

We all burst into laughter, including Seonghwa, who seems to have loosened up even more.

"It wasn't that I couldn't stand the taste of it, I had just never had such fancy wine before and it was a little strong for me back then!" my mom laughs

"You have the taste for expensive wines now though!" my dad comments

"I certainly do!" she says winking and holding up the glass of wine we brought before taking a drink.

"And then after all that you friend zoned me!" he laughs looking at her

"I was the best damn friend you ever had!" she replies looking back at him

"3 years later she finally agreed to be my girlfriend." he says, "and we were blessed with our little Luna soon afterwards!"

As our conversation continues, I can't help but pay attention to every small detail - the way Seonghwa chuckles at my father's cheesy jokes, his genuine interest in my mother's work stories. It all seems to be going smoothly, and I finally let myself relax.

"Luna has told us a little about you," my mom says to Seonghwa. "I understand that you need a degree of anonymity with your job and she's been very respectful about that."

Seonghwa blushes at her words, responding with a grateful smile. "I consider myself incredibly lucky to be a part of Luna's life," he says humbly. I reach for his hand under the table. The familiar warmth of his touch brings a smile to my face as I gently squeeze back, grateful to have him and the other guys in my life.

"Seonghwa, how did you get into the industry?" my dad asks, his voice gentle and curious.

"Ah, well, it started when I was young," Seonghwa replies "I always loved music, and when I saw kpop idols on TV, I knew that was what I wanted to do. So I auditioned for different agencies until KQ accepted me."

"Your hard work has certainly paid off," my dad says, nodding approvingly. "Forgive me, I don't keep up with kpop these days. My three daughters are the experts on that." he laughs "Luna says you're group is successful internationally. That's quite an accomplishment."

"Thank you, sir," Seonghwa responds, his gratitude genuine. "I've been fortunate to find a great team who supports and challenges me. We're like family."

As I listened to their exchange, I couldn't help but feel a surge of pride for Seonghwa. His dedication to his craft and love for his bandmates was truly inspiring. I am proud of all of them and their hard work. I catch my moms eye, and she gives me a knowing smile. She understands how much this moment means to me.

The dinner has progressed smoothly so far, everyone enjoying the delicious meal my mom had prepared, the conversation had flowed so naturally and it was heartwarming to see that Seonghwa was fitting in so seamlessly with my family.

Out of nowhere, my dad breaks the silence with a serious tone. "Seonghwa," he begins, his voice holding a weight I can feel in my chest. "I have an important question to ask you." My heart starts to race as anxiety sets in at the sudden shift in his demeanour.

"Of course, sir," Seonghwa replies, his expression attentive.

“How serious are you about my daughter?” he asks

"Dad!" I interject, feeling mortified that he would ask such a personal question.

"I am very serious, sir," Seonghwa answers confidently without skipping a beat.

"We cherish Luna and only want the best for her. She has faced challenges with all our moving due to my job, health issues, and even moving to Seoul alone at 18 years old. I will always worry about her, regardless of how grown and independent she may be. I will do everything in my power to seek justice for her if anyone ever harms her or causes her the slightest bit of sorrow." My dad continues speaking. "But I trust you to take care of her, to protect her and ensure her happiness."

Seonghwa's expression softens, and he nods earnestly. His voice, laced with determination and sincerity, cuts through the air as he speaks. "I promise you, sir," he declares. "I will pour every ounce of my being into ensuring Luna's happiness and well-being. You have my unwavering word on that."

"Thank you, Seonghwa," my dad says with a smile, glancing at my mom who gives him a nod. "We approve of your relationship."

"I know that in this modern era, our approval may not hold much weight, and we're not exactly traditional people either," my mom chimes in, "but when it comes to the happiness and safety of our firstborn daughter, we take things seriously."

"I completely understand, and I also take it very seriously," Seonghwa responds, looking at me. "Your daughter means everything to me."

I can't help but smile at his words, feeling my heart swell with emotions for him.

“Wait until the twins meet you,” my dad beams, “They're going to adore you! We haven't revealed Luna's employer yet; mostly because Hyejin can be quite loud at times!" he chuckles along with Seonghwa. "But also because they are familiar with your band."

"Oh right!" Seonghwa smiles

"As a matter of fact, we took them to see you perform in London earlier this year. It wasn't until Eunbi mentioned it that I even realised Luna worked for you."

"Wow," Seonghwa says, his cheeks turning slightly pink. "I hope we met their expectations."

"Oh, you definitely did!" my mom joins in with a laugh. "They couldn't stop talking about it for weeks."

As the meal nears its end, I realise that tonight was a significant moment in our relationship. My parents' acceptance of Seonghwa was more than I could have hoped for. I know my mom will eventually figure out there is something more between us, but for now, I can relax.

After my mom practically pushes us into the lounge, refusing Seonghwa's offer to help with the dishes, I tell him it's best not to argue with them. We settle onto the sofa as my parents put away the dishes.

"Are you okay?" he asks me, his hand resting on my knee.

"I am," I reply, smiling at him and leaning in for a kiss. I feel his emotions through the touch of his lips on mine. "And you? My dad hasn't scared you off?"

"It would take more than that to scare me away," he reassures me with a grin.

As we sit on the sofa, our hands intertwined, I start to feel a mix of excitement and tranquillity.

"So, what do you think of my parents?" I ask, breaking the silence.

Seonghwa looks at me with a warm smile. "I can see where you get your kindness from," he replies. "They're genuinely caring people, and it's clear that they love you."

I blush at his words, feeling a rush of gratitude toward my parents. "I'm lucky to have them," I say softly. "And I'm lucky to have you too."

His eyes sparkle as he leans closer, his voice barely above a whisper. "No, Luna. I'm the lucky one." He brushes a strand of hair behind my ear, his touch sending shivers down my spine. "We all are." he whispers

I lean into his touch, feeling contentment wash over me.

My parents return to the living room carrying a tray of tea and biscuits, taking a seat across from us on the sofa.

"Would you prefer to have coffee Seonghwa?" my mom asks

"No, tea is perfect with me." he replies

"I assume my daughter has been trying to convert you all onto British tea!" my dad says. My dad knows me too well.

"She has been pretty successful in that sense!" Seonghwa smiles with a light laugh

The air was thick with a sense of warmth and comfort, like a warm embrace. But as my mom settled into her seat, I couldn't help but feel a subtle change in her disposition. The light in her eyes dimmed slightly, and the corners of her mouth turned downwards ever so slightly. A hint of worry or concern seemed to weigh on her mind, making me suddenly feel tense and uneasy.

"Luna, how have you been coping?" she asks me

My heart leaps in my chest as I know what she is referring to.

"I've been absolutely fine mom, you don't need to worry."

"Have you been taking your medication regularly?" she asks, concern evident in her voice.

Seonghwa looks startled by the sudden change in topic, his eyes darting between me and my mother. My heart begins to beat faster in my chest as I look at my mom and nod, replying in a careful tone, "Yes, Mom."

"Are you absolutely certain?" my mom persists. "Taking it every day, without fail? You know how crucial it is for your health to stay on top of that. With all the recent changes in your life - your new job, moving apartments, and a new relationship on top of all that - it would be easy for you to forget such things."

"Mom," I say with a strained tone, attempting to keep my composure. I plead silently with my eyes for her to stop her questioning. Seonghwa's concerned expression only adds to the pressure building inside me, and I know I need to reassure him too. As I struggle to maintain a facade of calmness, beads of sweat form on my forehead, betraying my true emotions. The air in the room feels thick and suffocating, like a pressure cooker about to explode. "I promise you, everything is completely under control," I finally manage to say, trying to sound confident.

"Honey, you don't want to end up in hospital again."

Seonghwa speaks hesitantly, his eyes shifting between my mom and me. "Is everything alright?"

"Of course," I respond, placing my hand on his arm in reassurance. "It's nothing to worry about."

My mom lets out a sigh, "Luna..."

Luckily, my dad senses the mood and jumps in. "It's okay, honey," he says.

But my mom won't let it go. "Sambeom, it's not okay!" she says, using his formal birth name. It's never a good sign when she does that. And when she calls me mine too it means things are really serious. "Younhas bipolar disorder is not nothing!"

I feel my chest tighten, my hands begin to shake as I anticipate Seonghwa's response to my mother's words and I find myself wanting to escape from the lounge and the awkward conversation. My eyes frantically scan the room, desperate for a way out, but I know deep down that I can't just run away from this.

"Mom, I really wish you hadn't said that." I say in English, my voice trembles.

"Why not?" she replies, turning back to look at me with furrowed brows.

"Because I hadn't told Seonghwa yet!" I reply, feeling more anxious than ever now that he is looking at me with concern in his eyes and confusion etched on his face.

But my mom, ever the worrier, couldn't let it go. "How could you not have told him?! Seonghwa has a right to know. How can he look after you if he doesn’t know?"

"Actually," I counter, trying to keep my emotions in check, "It's my decision when and how to share something so personal. And also, I can look after myself!! I don’t need someone else to do it for me!"

She questions, "Shouldn't your boyfriend know everything about you?"

"Mom..." I pause, unsure of how to respond so she continues

"How can you expect to have an open and trusting relationship if you hide important details like that from him? On what planet do you expect a relationship to grow when you can't even be honest with him?!"

I try to reply but nothing comes out of my mouth. I know my mom has the best intentions and is only concerned for me but I feel so angry at this moment. Telling Seonghwa I am bipolar was one thing but to question my relationship was another. As the tension mounts, my dad clears his throat and attempts to change the subject. "So, Seonghwa, tell us more about your life as a singer. It must be very exciting."

I struggle to pay attention to the new conversation, my mind consumed by the revelation of my secret and the vulnerability it has exposed. Seonghwa notices my distress and tries to comfort me silently by holding my hand, but I need some space. I pull my hand away from his grasp and excuse myself to the bathroom, quickly leaving the room before anyone can respond.

"Luna!" I hear my mom call out as I enter the hallway.

"Give her a moment, honey," my dad interjects.

As I close the bathroom door behind me I fall back into it. I look up and see my reflection in the mirror of the door. I look awful! The tears that had filled my eyes has smudged eyeliner and mascara. My face is flushed red. My appearance mirrored the turmoil within me, a dishevelled mess that I couldn't hide or fix.

“Fuck!” I moan quietly, sinking to the floor, my body heavy with frustration. I slide over to the bath and rest against it. I pull my legs up and place my head on my knees. My hands pressed flat against the cool marble flooring, providing some sense of stability amidst the chaos in my mind. I close my eyes and take slow, purposeful breaths, trying to focus on the sensation of the cold surface beneath me in an attempt to ground myself before I spiral further and let it consume me completely.

After 5, maybe even 10 minutes I hear a light tap on the door and I raise my head, startled out of my thoughts. "It's me, darling," Seonghwa's gentle voice calls from outside. "You don't need to open the door, but please just let me know that you're alright."

I lean forward to unlock it before moving back against the bath, pulling my knees up to my chest and wrapping my arms around them. The room is dimly lit, with only a small window allowing a sliver of light to enter. Seonghwa enters slowly, his soft footsteps barely audible on the tiled floor. He sees me sitting on the floor and quietly closes and locks the door behind him before taking a seat beside me. His long legs stretched out in front of him.

"You don't have to face this alone." He says softly. "You have the 8 of us right here with you."

As I listen to his words, my frazzled nerves start to calm down. His reassurance is like a soothing balm, but even with his comforting words, I can't shake the fear that my condition will impact our relationship, despite his promises.

I start to speak, my words hesitant and uncertain. "Seonghwa...I never intended to deceive you. To lie to you all."

He interrupts me, his voice full of reassurance. "You didn't lie at all."

The weight of my guilt hangs heavy in the air, suffocating me with every breath. My hands shake as I grasp onto my legs tightly, fighting back the tears that threaten to spill over. "I did lie, by omission," I finally choke out, my voice trembling with emotion. "You all made it clear from the beginning that honesty was necessary for this relationship to thrive, and I wasn't. My mom is right, if I can’t be honest with you all then this relationship won’t work!” I say holding back the tears.

Seonghwas head quickly snaps to look at me. “Darling, my feelings for you haven’t changed. I am not letting you go.” he replies, putting an arm around me.

“But…” I begin but he stops me

"I'm not upset that you didn't tell us; I understand why. You are an incredibly independent person, you made it clear to all of us from the start that you do not like being fussed over and you probably knew that we would do exactly that if we knew. All I care about is your safety and how you're coping with it on your own. Are you okay?" he says

“I am!” I confirm, letting myself lean against his body while still keeping my arms tightly wrapped around my knees. “I truly mean it. I’ve been diligently taking my prescribed medication and regularly visiting my therapist."

"That is good!" I can hear the smile on his face. "Does your therapy help?"

"It helps a lot! Remember when I said I was going to the karaoke room with my cousin last week?" I feel him nod in reply "I was actually at one of my therapy sessions. I hated having to lie to you all, but Hongjoong knew where I was. He has known for a while." I take the opportunity to look at him, hoping to gauge his reaction to what we are talking about.

"That makes me feel better knowing you weren't dealing with it all alone." he smiles softly at me

"I was planning to tell you and the others when I was ready. I swear to you!” I say as I slowly unwrap my arms from my legs and let them move towards him

He pulls me closer, and I allow myself to fully sink into his embrace now. "I know you would have," he says as his hand strokes my face. "You just needed the perfect moment, huh?" I nod silently, feeling grateful for his understanding. He kisses the top of my head, and for a moment everything feels okay. His hands move me so I am sitting on his lap facing him.

"My bipolar doesn't define me. Just like my allergies don't but it is a part of who I am." I say looking into his eyes "As much as I want to, I can't change that. It makes people treat me as if I am about to break or a child who can't do anything for myself, like manage my medication or keep on top of my condition." I look down as my hands rest on his chest, "I was scared that you would all treat me the same way or decide I am not worth it."

"I know, Luna," he says softly, his voice unwavering. I feel his fingers touch the tip of my chin, gently tilting my head to look at him "We would never think you aren't worth it. And I don't normally speak for the others but I will now because I am 100% certain of these words - none of us are going anywhere. I don't think any of us can imagine life without you in it now." The sincerity in his gaze brings tears to my eyes and I am overwhelmed with gratitude. I don't deserve such understanding and compassion. Leaning in, I press my lips against his, relieved when he kisses me back. We stay that way for a moment, our foreheads touching.

"I am sorry for leaving you alone with my parents like I did." I say with a small sigh.

He responds, "It's fine. You needed space. Your mom explained that when you get overwhelmed you need time alone to do a little reset." He takes my face in his hands. "Please don't be mad at me for what I am about to say next, but she does have a point. About the new changes you've gone through lately, I mean."

I pull back slightly to look at him, noticing the worry in his eyes. I lean in for a kiss to reassure him. "I'm not mad and of course she's right! She usually is but it just doesn't make her overbearing nature any easier to deal with." I say

"I can see that." he says softly "Do you want to go home now?"

"Yes, please. Anywhere but this bathroom floor. I'll speak with my mom tomorrow, when we're both in a better state of mind." I let out a sigh of relief that he understands what I need.

"I'll talk to your parents and grab your things. Don't worry," he smiles at me reassuringly. "I'll wait by the door for when you're ready. Take your time."

"Thank you," I smile back as he helps me up and stands up too. He kisses my cheek before unlocking the bathroom door and leaving. I look at myself in the mirror and groan. My makeup is smudged all over my face, making me look like a panda. I try to clean it up, but it's no use. I grab a makeup wipe from the counter top and remove most of it. Even though my face is still red and puffy from crying, Seonghwa has seen me look worse first thing in the morning and at this point of the evening I don't even care. I take out my contact lenses, which have become incredibly uncomfortable from all the tears.

As I go into the hallway I see Seonghwa and my dad at the front door. My bag and coat are in Seonghwas hands as he talks with my dad quietly. I can't hear what they are saying in their hushed voiced but they both have serious looks on their faces so I can only assume it is about me.

"There is my beautiful girl!" my dad smiles as he sees me and opens his arms. "It was lovely to see you both tonight." he adds as I sink into him

"Is mom okay?" I ask quietly. It didn't feel right leaving without saying goodbye to her but at the same time I didn't trust myself not to say something and inside there was still a bubble of anger in the pit of my stomach.

"Don't worry, she is fine! You two will patch things up when you are both in a calmer mood, just like you always do." he whispers into my ear. "Now make sure to text me when you are both safely home!" he add louder for Seonghwa to hear.

Seonghwa helps me put my coat on and my bag then we leave after my dad hands over a bag full of leftover food. As we walk out of the apartment building and into the cool night air, I feel a sense of relief washing over me. The tension that had built up between my mom and me is still there and will be until we speak properly, but for now, I feel a little calmer. Seonghwas hand clasps onto mine as we walk back to our apartment. In the dark surroundings of the night and without my contact lenses in, my vision is bad and I am relying purely on Seonghwa to guide me.

"Are you alright?" he asks with concern. "Your face looks like you're in pain."

"Oh no, this is just my 'I can't see shit without my glasses on' face." I reply

"What about your contacts?" he inquires

"I had to take them out in the bathroom. They were making my eyes irritated from all the tears." I explain.

"Darling, why didn't you tell me you couldn't see? Hop on my back and I'll carry you the rest of the way." he offers, moving in front of me.

"Aww, I appreciate it, but I'm fine!" I laugh lightly. "Just hold my hand tight and make sure I don't walk into anything like a streetlight or a plant!"

"Okay." he sighs, I can't see his expression clearly enough but the tone said it all.

He takes my hand in his again, guiding me gently as we make our way into the park. There is a peaceful quietness between us. Seonghwa leads me to a tree adorned with twinkling fairy lights, and in the soft glow, I can see his face a little clearly now. He pulls me into an embrace, wrapping his arms around me in a comforting gesture. I nuzzle into his chest, inhaling his familiar scent mixed with the crisp autumn air.

"I'm sorry you had to go through all of this," he whispers into my ear. "But just remember, no matter what happens with your mom or anything else in life, I'll always be here for you."

A single tear escapes down my cheek, and I cling to him with even more strength. "There's something else I need to tell you," I manage to say. He remains silent, giving me the space and comfort to continue. "I only found out about my bipolar disorder because... I did something really really stupid."

He speaks softly as I pull away from him, trying to gather the courage to tell him face-to-face. "You can tell me," he reassures me.

"I-I tried...I wanted to..." I stumble over my words, struggling to voice what's on my mind. "I'm sorry, I'm just... scared."

"If it's too difficult for you to say, then you don't have to. Our relationship won't change either way," he assures me again.

"No, I need to tell you, it is the least you deserve." I reply taking a deep breath. "I was in a dark place early last year - overworked, overwhelmed, exhausted, and incredibly lonely. I was missing my family, missing my friends. Due to the pandemic I was working very long hours then going home alone. Everything just felt like too much to handle and I didn't know what to do. I wished for peace more than anything though. Just wanted things to stop. I wanted the thoughts to stop." I sigh looking down, scared to look at his face. My eyes focus on a button on his coat as I continue. "My friends brother found me. He was dropping off some food their mom had made for their neighbourhood, she always made extra for everyones friends too so Minjun dropped mine off. He thought I was working that night so had only planned to leave the food in my fridge and go but I wasn't and he found me unconscious. He drove me to the hospital and stayed with me while they.... fixed me" I struggle to say the exact words. "I was soon transferred to the psychiatric unit for assessment, even then he stayed in the hospital building until my Uncle Jihoon and Aunt Soomin arrived 2 days later. They had been in Jeju Island with her family. I stayed in the unit for 5 weeks, during which time I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and started medication and therapy treatment." I can feel his arms tighten around me. "It is why I always wear a lot of bracelets or long sleeves, I don't want people to see the scars."

"Thank you for trusting me enough to share this with me," he says, his voice filled with empathy. "I can't begin to imagine the pain you've been through, but I want you to know that I'm here for you now."

A wave of pure relief washes over me. I hadn't expected him to be so understanding.

"Lets get you home!" he smiles.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

The apartment is bustling with noise as we enter, now that more people are home. Mingi and Yeosang are engrossed in a game of Mario Kart on the sofa, while Yunho and Jongho watch them play.

“Ah, wasn’t expecting you two back so early!” Yunho smiles looking over at us

"We're all playing Mario Kart, you should join us," Yeosang suggests, eyes fixated on the television screen

I exchange a glance with Seonghwa and give a slight nod. To be honest, I just want to crawl into bed and sleep it off, but I know Yunho will start worrying if I do that. And Seonghwa would definitely be concerned as well, considering recent events.

“Sure.” Seonghwa says, his hand strokes my back gently.

Sitting in the middle of Yunho and Jongho, I catch a subtle exchange of looks between Yunho and Seonghwa. Suddenly, Yunho declares that he's going to make ramen for everyone. He leans in to kiss my cheek before heading to the kitchen, Seonghwa follows closely behind. My heart races with fear that Seonghwa might spill my secret to Yunho. He sees me looking at him, probably with a look of fear in my eyes and comes over to me instead, he surprises me by leaning down and planting a gentle kiss on my other cheek. In a hushed tone, he reassures me, "It's alright. I am just going to put the food in the fridge. Would you like some toast and jam?"

I shake my head, "Not hungry." I respond.

"Maybe a cup of tea and some chocolate biscuits?" He inquires.

"I'm fine," I say.

"Have some noodles at least, even just a little bit?" He suggests. I look up at his eyes and they look almost pleading-like.

"Okay," I reply quietly. There's no use arguing with him; I can tell he's determined to make sure I eat something.

Seonghwa runs his fingers through my hair gently before heading back into the kitchen. Jonghos body settles next to me on the couch, and I follow suit by bringing my feet up and crossing my legs. Mingi and Yeosang are still engrossed in their game as Jongho and I sit in silence, my gaze fixed on the coffee table in front of us. Tears begin to well up in my eyes again, and I let out a small sniffle that goes unnoticed thanks to the noise from the game as well as Mingi and Yeosangs playful banter with one another over who was in the lead. Or so I thought until I feel Jongho's hand slip into mine. I look at him, surprised by his sudden contact but also comforted by it at the same time. His eyes remain focused on the TV. My gaze shifts down to our linked hands as he gives it a gentle squeeze, our intertwined fingers hidden from view between us on the couch.

As we sit in silence, a sense of understanding permeates the air between us, offering an unspoken solace. I let my head fall against the plush back of the sofa and gaze up at the ceiling, trying to hold back the tears threatening to spill from my eyes. I decide to focus on my breathing. With each inhale and exhale, I can feel my body slowly succumbing to the tiredness. I feel the heavy weight of my head listlessly roll to the side and come to rest on something sturdy and warm. The faint aroma of Jongho's signature cologne lingers in my nose as my mind slips into a state of emotional exhaustion.

─ ｡☆: 3rd person POV :☆｡ ─

Jongho's gaze shifts down to his shoulder as he notices that Luna has succumbed to slumber, her form nestled against him in peaceful repose. He can see the gentle rise and fall of her chest as she breathes, her body completely relaxed against the side of his body. Unsure of how to proceed, Jongho takes in his surroundings - Mingi and Yeosang engrossed in their race, Seonghwa and Yunho bustling in the kitchen - before returning his attention to Luna, studying her delicate features.

Over the past few weeks, he has made a conscious effort not to stare at her. Which has been easier said than done when he wants nothing more than to look at her, wondering what she sees in him to want to be with him. His thoughts carrying away and convinces himself that maybe it's because of the others around him and he's just a small part of the package deal.

Whenever they are alone together, he becomes too flustered to even speak, let alone truly look at her. But now, for the first time, he can admire Luna's features without feeling self-conscious. He notices that her natural lip shape resembles a heart and she has light coloured freckles sprinkled across her cheeks, a little mole underneath her left eye and a tiny indent of a very old scar on her cheek. He takes this opportunity to fully take in all of her unique features. Jongho allows himself to sink into this moment, feeling grateful for the calm bliss it brings. That Luna feels safe and comfortable enough with him to fall asleep beside him.

As soon as Luna had sat down beside him, he could sense the tension in her body. The murmuring tone of her conversation with Seonghwa when her voice is usually animated even when being quieter, the way Seonghwa looked at her like he was concerned and then the soft sniffle he heard confirmed that something was bothering her. He couldn't just ignore it; he wanted to offer some kind of comfort to her. Without drawing attention or making her uneasy by asking if she was ok, he gently took her hand in his. For a moment, he was worried she might pull away, but when he felt her hand relax in his grasp and he knew she welcomed the support. Now she had fallen asleep on his shoulder.

As Seonghwa comes in from the kitchen holding some bowls of ramen he quickly noticed Luna on Jonghos shoulder.

"Is she sleeping?" he whispers, setting the bowls down on the coffee table.

"Yeah, she just dozed off suddenly," Jongho replies.

Seonghwa disappears into Luna's bedroom and returns with her favourite kuromi blanket in his hands. Mingi and Yeosang turn their attention to Luna as well.

"Is everything alright? With Luna, I mean." Jongho asks as Seonghwa gently lays the blanket over her as Yunho comes in with drinks.

"Yeah, she is fine." Seonghwa replies

"You sure?" Yunho asks, his eyebrow raising slightly

Like Jongho, Yunho had also picked up on her body language when she got home and the look in Seonghwas eyes.

"Yeah, she was just tired on the walk home. I think seeing her family after so long probably took a lot out of her." he explains, gently stroking Luna's cheek. "You know how we can get when we're away from our families for too long."

"Yeah, we definitely do." Mingi nods his eyes looking at her, "It must be harder for Luna though. Her family doesn't even live in the same country as she does."

"How will we get her into her bed?" Yeosang asks

"We can let her rest here for a little while. I don't mind sitting out of the next game, Seonghwa can take my spot. If she doesn't wake up within an hour, I can carry her to her room and one of you can help get her ready for bed," Jongho suggests.

They all agree with that plan. Seonghwa and Yunho sit down and they begin to eat and play. As time passes by, Luna remains sound asleep on Jonghos shoulder, not moving an inch and their hands still entwined. The room is filled with a hushed silence, broken only by soft laughter at the game antics and the occasional clink of utensils as they ate.

Finally Luna begins to stir, feeling a slight stiffness in her neck from the angle her head had been at. Her eyes flutter open, trying to take in her surroundings with her blurred vision.

"Hey sleepyhead!" Jongho greets her quietly with a gentle smile

Luna suddenly sits upright and looks at him, realising she had fallen asleep on him. "Sorry." she mumbles, her hand leaving his. "You should have nudged me to wake up!"

"It is okay, you must have needed the sleep." he says

"You want some noodles? We have some left over." Yunho says

"No thanks, I just want to go to bed. I have work in the morning." she replies yawning loudly "Oh sorry!" she covers her mouth, blushing lightly at how loud it was.

Yunho's hand caresses Luna's back, eliciting a small smile from her to him. He senses something is off, but he doesn't want to pry. At first he thought she was feeling uneasy about their night together but then remembered how she cuddled into him earlier as she waited for Seonghwa, kissed him infront of both Mingi and Seonghwa. While in the kitchen he had asked Seonghwa if everything was okay with Luna, he received the same answer as everyone else - she was just exhausted. And when Yunho discovered her sleeping soundly in the lounge a few minutes later, it seemed to confirm that. However, he couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to it, and he wondered if it had anything to do with the insecurity she had confided in him about the night before.

Yunho is pleasantly surprised when Luna turns to hug him properly. Seonghwas eyes carefully watch her, looking for any signs of feeling upset, as does the others. She stands up from the sofa with the help of Yunho and Jongho, exchanging hugs and goodnight kisses to each of the guys except Jongho. She wasn't sure if he was ready for that level of physical contact yet since he has only held her hand twice and then there was the near kiss in the kitchen the week before.

As she bids Jongho a good night, he reaches out and gently strokes the side of her head before she can turn away. His smile is soft and kind as he looks at her. The others begin to tidy up the lounge, taking the dishes into the kitchen, leaving them alone in the lounge.

"Sorry again for falling asleep on you." she says

"My shoulder is always available if you need it again." he laughs lightly "I hope you have a good sleep sweetheart." he adds moving his hand to cup her cheek delicately.

Luna feels her heart skip a beat at the pet name he has suddenly started calling her recently. Resisting the urge to hug him, she simple smiles and says "You too." before going to her bedroom. Unbeknown to her, Jongho was also holding back from pulling her into his arms and holding her tightly.

Luna smiles as she sees the large kuromi plushie Yunho got her on the bed indicating to her that he had put it in her bedroom while she was out this evening. Immediately she goes over to it and pulls it into her arms, lying on the bed. The soft fabric and faint scent of Yunho giving her comfort.

Once a few moments have passed, she stands up and prepares for bed. She follows her nightly routine of washing her face and brushing her teeth before selecting her pyjamas for the night. After glancing at her usual long-sleeved nightshirt she throws it onto the chair at her desk and instead pulls a vest top from her dresser. It is too hot at night for such a heavy material of the long sleeved shirt and tonight she just wants to be comfortable, not covered up.

She puts on the top and a pair of shorts before picking up the clothes scattered on the floor and tossing them onto the chair with the discarded night shirt.

A soft voice interrupts her thoughts, causing her to turn around and see Seonghwa entering her bedroom. He closes the door behind him before walking over to her.

"I just wanted to check on you before I go to bed," he says gently. "Tonight was a lot for you."

"It was, but I'll be okay Hwa," she replies. "I feel safe here... in my home with all of you."

"I'm glad this feels like home to you, because it is. And I think it's safe to say that we all feel more at home with you here too," he responds.

Luna moves closer to him and wraps her arms around his shoulders, feeling his warmth against her own body.

"Are you okay?" she asks. "Tonight must have been overwhelming for you too – not just my parents, but everything else that occurred. You had a lot of heavy information thrown at you."

With a serious expression, Seonghwa says, "I won't hide the truth from you." Luna takes in a sharp breath, bracing herself for whatever he is about to say. "I know it's a lot to handle, but all I want is for you to be happy and healthy. If you tell me that you have your bipolar disorder under control, then I will trust you. But please promise me that if you start feeling like things are slipping or not quite right, you will tell me or Hongjoong immediately." He leans in closer, looking into her eyes as she nods in agreement, her hand moving to the side of his head. "Promise me!"

"I promise you, Hwa. I will tell you." she replies firmly.

A look of slight relief washes over his face, causing his features to soften into a gentle smile. He reaches for her hand, carefully threading his fingers through hers and pressing a tender kiss against the delicate skin of her wrist. Normally, she despises any attention being drawn to her scars, but with him, she feels nothing but safety and acceptance. She knows that he sees and understands her past struggles.

"If you need anything tonight, just come to my room. Even if I am asleep, wake me up." he says looking back at her eyes

"I am sure I will be fine but thank you." she replies

Seonghwa smiles softly at her, nodding his head in understanding before pulling her close and pressing a gentle kiss against her lips. Their breaths mingle in the air between them, warm and sweet.

"All right, then," he whispers back. "Let's get you tucked into bed."

Luna nods as Seonghwa helps her lie down on the soft, cosy pillows of her bed. The sheets are cool against her heated skin but comfortable. He hands over the kuromi plushie, smiling fondly at it as she wraps her arms around it while he pulls up the blankets over her, taking care to make sure she's snug and warm. He tucks a stray lock of hair behind her ear and leans in close again to kiss her forehead.

"Goodnight, Luna," he whispers, stroking her cheek with his thumb as he pulls away from her slightly but not letting go of their entwined hands.

"Goodnight, Hwa," she replies softly, her voice barely above a whisper too.

She watches as he switches on her fairy lights, turns off her bedside lamp and makes his way across her room to her door. He gives her one last smile before leaving. She yawns and closes her eyes, as she hears the others quietly making their way upstairs to their respective bedrooms. Tonight didn't go as planned, however Luna knew one thing for certain - she felt lighter knowing she wasn't lying or hiding something from one more person in her life but hoped the time would come soon she would feel ready to tell the others, and that they will be as understanding as Hongjoong and Seonghwa have been.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

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hwaberry-dreams · 3 months

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Username update. Changed my username from pink-hwaberry to hwaberry-dreams

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hwaberry-dreams · 3 months

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SEVENTEEN: in this together

Warnings: fingering, brief handjob, unprotected sex (don’t!), mentions of birth control and sexual health checks,

Word Count: 10k

Summary: Luna and Yunho spend an intimate night together for the first time. The following day, Seonghwa returns home and it is time for him to meet her parents.

The air around us seems to still, as if holding its breath in anticipation. The warmth of Yunho's lips pressed against mine sends a shiver down my spine, and I could feel the heat radiating between us. His strong arms wrap around me as he lifts me off the ground, pressing me gently against the wall. Our breaths mingle in the small space between our mouths, and I couldn't help but smile.

"Are you trying to sweep me off my feet, Mr. Jeong?" I tease, gazing into his piercing brown eyes.

"Only if it's working," he replies with a flirtatious grin, his dimples making an appearance.

"It might be." I grin back as his lips crash onto mine once more. My body responds by wrapping my legs tighter around his waist as our kisses become more urgent and desperate. I can feel his growing erection pressing into me, sending waves of desire coursing through my body. Frustrated by the barrier of our clothes, I pull at the hem of his t-shirt, eager to remove it.

"Someone's a little impatient," he teases, his voice low and playful.

"Four whole days without your hugs and kisses, Yunho! Four fucking days!" I reply with a laugh, my fingers deftly pulls at the material and eagerly anticipating what comes next.

Yunho lets out a deep laugh as he allows me to yank his shirt off, revealing every inch of his chiselled chest and defined abs. My eyes widen in awe as I take in his topless form for the first time, admiring the way his muscles ripple with each movement. He places his hand on my cheek and smiles softly before pulling me down for another deep kiss.

His hand moves down my legs and underneath the fabric of my dress, sending shivers down my spine as he touches my skin. His fingers trace patterns on my skin until it reaches my thigh while our tongues explore each other's mouths. The sensation of his warm hand on my bare skin ignites a fire within me, causing an involuntary moan to escape my lips.

"If you want me to stop at any point, tell me." he says pulling back to look into my eyes

"I will." I promise nodding as he safely puts me back on the ground

We make our way to his bed, our fingers intertwine, the excitement building inside me like a bubbling cauldron as we begin to undress each other. My cardigan and dress, along with his jeans fall to the floor in a trail of garments, leading towards his bed like breadcrumbs.

"Yunho, your socks don't match," I tease, pointing at his feet.

"Luna, your observation skills never cease to amaze me," he says feigning surprise

"Well someone has to keep you on your toes." I reply

Yunho playfully gasps, place a hand over his chest "Are you suggesting that my fashion choices in socks are questionable?"

"Questionable is an understatement. But I commend you for having the courage to wear such mismatched socks," I respond with a grin.

"Not everyone has that kind of bravery," he chuckles and flings one sock across the room.

"I suppose I should feel special to witness such a daring fashion statement," I say.

"Of course!" he grins, taking off the other sock. "Perhaps one day you'll have the privilege of choosing my mismatched socks!"

"What an honour that would be!" I reply, trying not to burst into laughter.

"Be warned, it's a responsibility not to be taken lightly!" he warns.

His comment sends me into an uncontrollable fit of giggles.

"You make me laugh so much!" I manage to say, my eyes watery with laughter

"They do say the best way to get a woman into bed is to make her laugh!" he grins, his large hands holding onto my hips

"I highly doubt you would need that tactic to get the job done," I reply with a playful smirk as he pulls me onto the bed. "Women must fall at your feet!"

"Hmm, you'd be surprised!" he replies

As we settle onto the soft bedding, I suddenly find myself reflecting on how lucky I am to have met Yunho. He has been there for me, supporting me both emotionally and professionally. They all have been but Yunho was the first one. During my first week on the job when I was just a bundle of nerves of finally working in my dream job and trying to get to know them all. He sat beside me as I started to make individual lesson plans for each of them. Though he didn't speak and was scrolling through his phone, his quiet presence gave me comfort and assurance that I was not alone. I could feel him there, close by and ready if I needed any help. I realise that I’ve never told him how much that meant to me.

"Yunho," I whisper, tracing the contours of his face with my fingertips as I stare into his brown eyes. "Thank you."

"For what?" he asks with genuine curiosity in his voice.

"For being there for me. For accepting me, all of me, even when I struggle to accept myself," I confess. "All of you have but you were the first one who reached out to me and gave me support at work when we were still just work colleagues." A sudden small tear escapes from my eye and rolls down my cheek.

"Hey, don't cry, little one" Yunho says softly, wiping away the lone tear before pulling me into a warm hug. "You deserve to be receive love and acceptance just as much as anyone else, Luna. And I'm honoured that you're allowing us to give that to you."

As we lay there, cocooned in each other's embrace, a sense of calmness envelops me like a warm blanket. In this moment, with his heart beating steadily against mine, I am certain that I have found my home. For as long as they'll let me be there for them anyway.

Yunho's arms are like pillars of strength, holding me close yet allowing me to move freely. This is our first time sharing such an intimate space together, and my heart flutters with anticipation and nerves.

Yunho's gaze pierces mine, searching for any hint of hesitation or discomfort. His dark eyes are filled with concern and kindness as he asks, "Are you okay?"

I take a deep breath before admitting, "Yeah, I'm just nervous."

A gentle smile spreads across Yunho's face as he responds, "Me too. But we can take our time, go at our own pace. We have all the time in the world tonight."

The warmth in his words soothes my nerves and I feel my tense muscles begin to relax. The anticipation of what is to come still lingers in the air, but with Yunho by my side, I know we can navigate through it together. We both move forwards to kiss one another.

I can feel him holding back as we kiss. I take one of his hands and move it to my breast. After a few seconds of hesitation he begins to palm it through my bra. His touch is gentle yet purposeful as he reaches around my back, causing me to instinctively arch towards him. With a flick of his fingers, my bra falls away and I let out a soft sigh. As he helps me remove the material, it joins the pile of discarded clothes on the floor.

A sudden wave of shyness washes over me as his gaze lingers on my topless form. Even though he has touched me under my shirt that one time on the sofa, he hasn't seen me topless and I feel a bit self conscious. My boobs are a little on the bigger side, not huge but larger than average and it’s something I’ve always felt self conscious about.

"Wow," he whispers in admiration,"You are so beautiful!" his words causing a pleasant tingling sensation throughout my body. "I had a feeling you had some tattoos under those clothes!" he grins gesturing to the one on my ribs. He easily covers both of my breasts with his large hands, smiling as he squeezes and caresses them. In that moment, any shyness I initially felt dissipates.

As I whisper, "You're beautiful too," I can't help but admire the stunning appearance before me. "It's not just your physical beauty because you truly are; there's a kind and gentle heart that radiates from within as well."

A faint blush spreads across his cheeks as he gazes at me with intensity. "I never knew you saw me that way."

"Well, now you know," I say with a smile. "And I can't forget to mention your irresistible lips!" My playful tone gives me a boost of confidence.

"Really?" He grins mischievously as I nod.

With a chuckle, he leans in for a passionate kiss. As we break apart, Yunho trails fiery kisses down my neck, causing soft gasps to escape my lips. His hands glide down my sides, gently teasing over my hips and stomach.

"You respond so well," he whispers against my skin. "I love how you react to my touch."

Yunhos words send shivers down my spine and I can feel the heat pooling between my thighs. I want him desperately. His lips continue to trail downward, leaving a trail of kisses until they reach my panties. He leans in and uses his teeth to pull the fabric down, causing me to lift my hips. I watch as he removes the garment with his teeth before tossing them aside without breaking eye contact with me. My heart is racing at the intensity of his gaze on me.

I move my hands down to his boxers and push the material down. Yunho helps me to remove them, going onto his knees to take them completely off, now fully naked in front of me. My heart races as I take in the sight of him, his body so beautifully sculpted and defined. I can't help but notice how well-endowed he is, causing another wave of anticipation and nerves to wash over me.

"Yunho..." I stutter, my lips quivering with nervousness.

“Are you okay?” he asks tenderly, his gaze never leaving mine.

"I'm just...worried..." I admit, biting my lip nervously as I look down at him. ".. it will hurt!"

He looks down at himself and then back at me, understanding immediately what I am referring to. His eyes soften with understanding and he reaches out to gently cup my cheek.

"Don't worry, Luna. I'll be careful and go slowly." he reassures me, his voice calm and reassuring. "I'll need to do some prep work before we even get to that stage."

I nod, feeling a mix of excitement and apprehension building inside me. I know Yunho will take care of me, but the thought of being intimate with him for the first time sends butterflies fluttering in my stomach. "If anything feels uncomfortable or sore, just let me know, okay?" he adds, his gaze seeking mine for confirmation.

I nod again, feeling grateful for his consideration and care. This is the start of something special between us, and I trust Yunho completely.

"Is anything else on your mind?" he asks, his hand caressing my cheekbone gently. I feel the warmth of his touch and it soothes me.

"I care about you deeply," I say, my voice heavy with emotion. "I don't want this to change anything." My heart races as I wait for his response.

"Nothing will change, I promise," he assures me, leaning closer until our faces are inches apart. "If anything, this will bring us closer together." He kisses me softly. "We'll go at your pace," Yunho whispers, his breath warm on my ear. He takes my hand and squeezes it gently before kissing it. "Tell me what you want."

"I want.. want you to touch me." I say, my face flushing with embarrassment

He takes his time, gently exploring and adoring every inch of my body. As his hand travels down, I feel his fingers trace over the scar on my lower stomach, his eyes focusing on it.

"Appendix scar." I say in answer to his unspoken question

As if he senses my discomfort surrounding it, his hand moves away from it and he smiles at me before pressing his lips against my own. My core aches with anticipation, longing for him to touch me.

His kisses move from my lips to my jawline, to my neck and lower. As he latches onto one of my nipples with his mouth, his hand moves between my legs and I gasp at the electrifying sensation of his fingers grazing over me.

"Wow, you're already so wet," he groans, pulling away to meet my gaze.

I can feel the heat rising in my cheeks as he kisses me again, skilfully tracing his fingers through my slick folds until they find my clit. I can't help but moan at the intense pleasure coursing through me.

His lips move back down my chest again, leaving a trail of wet kisses. His tongue flicks against one of my nipples. I gasp at the sensation, arching into him, begging for more. He complies, sucking harder as he rolls his tongue around the sensitive nub while continuing to tease my clit with light circles.

"Yunho," I whimper, feeling myself getting closer to the edge. "Please..."

He slides two fingers inside me, parting my folds and delving deep. It feels so good but also intense, like a burst of pleasure unlike anything I've ever experienced before. I already feel close to coming due to his long fingers finding my spot instantly and judging from his precise movements now, he knows it too.

"You're so tight," he whispers, brushing his lips against my neck, "but oh god, you feel so good around my fingers."

The combination of his words and expert touch becomes too much to bear, and I surrender to the ecstasy building within me. A wave of pleasure crashes over me, engulfing me in a sea of pure bliss.

As my body trembles and spasms beneath his touch, Yunho wraps and arm around me, holding me close as I ride out the aftershocks of my release. He peppers soft kisses along my collarbone, whispering sweet reassurances into my ear.

When I finally catch my breath and open my eyes, Yunho's face is filled with a mixture of adoration and awe. "You're amazing," he murmurs, his voice filled with genuine admiration.

A shy smile spreads across my lips as I reach up to caress his cheek. Yunho's smile back at me as he leans down to capture my lips once more, his tongue sweeping softly into my mouth. After a few moments, he pulls away slowly, his face a few inches away from mine.

His voice is soft, almost a whisper as he asks, "Have you ever used lube during sex?" I shake my head in response, feeling a bit shy. He reassures me, "We'll use some lube, it will help." He rolls off the bed and pads towards a small drawer unit beside his desk, opening it with a smooth motion.

I instinctively close my legs and sit up straight, suddenly feeling self-conscious. "Am I not wet enough?" I ask

"You're plenty wet," he replies with a playful chuckle, sauntering back to bed with the tube in hand. "But using lube isn't just for dryness." His words make me flush even more as I realise my mistake.

"Oh," I say sheepishly, feeling embarrassed for assuming otherwise.

"It actually makes things more enjoyable for both of us as well," he explains. "It adds to the fun!" he says with a mischievous grin. "I am going to put my fingers back in but this time try to open you up a bit more so its easier when we are ready to.. you know." I notice his ears redden slightly and it reassures me to see he is feeling the same way as I am.

As he pushes his finger inside me, I shiver at the cold sensation of the lube. His slow movements inside feel pleasurable as he adds a second finger, but I can sense him starting to stretch me open too.

He whispers in my ear, urging me to relax. As he leans down on top of me, his lips press against my neck in a gentle kiss. I follow his instructions and take slow breaths, trying to calm myself. My hand reaches up and threads through his hair, enjoying the sensation of the soft strands between my fingers as he gently adds a third finger. I can feel his hardness pressing against my thigh, and I use my other hand to wrap around his arousal, eliciting a sharp response from him against my neck.

He has spent the last hour taking care of me, making sure I am feeling good and I want him to feel the same way. I begin to move my hand eliciting deep moans and sighs from him. He feels so much bigger in my grasp and a flutter of nervous anticipation rushes through me once more.

"Remember to breathe," he reminds me, his voice low and husky as his own desire builds. "Don't focus on me, just yourself."

"I want you to feel good too though." I pout in a whiny tone

"You will, little one. You will." he reassures me gazing down at me with a gentle smile

"Yunho, I want you now." I plead as my desire for him grows stronger by the second.

He leans over me, his breath tickling my ear as he whispers, "Are you sure you are ready for me, little one?"

My heart races as I nod eagerly, unable to contain my longing any longer.

"Ok, we will take this slow." he replies slowly pulling his fingers out and picking up a condom from beside his knees that he must have got when got the lube.

"Oh, we can't use a regular condom." I say when I see what one he has, recognising the brand straight away. "I have a small allergy to latex." I add which causes him to instantly throw the packet across the room as if it had just gave him an electric shock and holds his hands up, away from me.

"Ah shit, I didn't know!" he says, his face contorting into panic "I should wash my hands before I touch you."

"It's okay, you don't need to," I reassure him, sitting up and reaching for his hands. "You didn't even touch the condom and even if you did, it wouldn't affect me. My allergy is only triggered by direct contact with latex, not through second hand touch like my seafood allergy."

"Well, those are the only condoms I have," he says with a conflicted expression.

With a nervous bite of my lip, I suggest, "I actually got my test results back and I am all clear.... p-plus I am on birth control too so... if you want.. you know.. we could..." My nerves heighten as I struggle to finish my sentence. "...do it.. without." His eyes flicker to mine and he swallows hard. "We don't have to if you don't want to though. I have latex free ones in my room!" I add quickly, he looks like a deer caught in the headlights and I know I've made him uncomfortable. "Sorry, I'll go get the ones from my room."

He places a gentle hand on my shoulder, halting my attempt to get up. "I want to," he says, his gaze piercing into mine with intensity. My heart flutters as I meet his eyes and feel the warmth of his touch. "I've just never done it without a condom before."

A smile spreads across my face and I reach up to pull his face closer to mine, our lips meeting in a soft, tender kiss. Our noses brush against each other's as we part.

"Neither have I, but I want to with you." I whisper breathlessly. "I want my first time without to be with you." The words slip from my lips like a secret, but they hold so much meaning and desire behind them.

Yunho's eyes widen slightly as my words sink in. He takes a moment to process what I've just said, the weight of it hanging between us. But then, a genuine smile spreads across his face, replacing any trace of hesitation.

"Are you sure about this?" he asks softly, searching my eyes for any sign of uncertainty.

I nod "Yes, I am 100% sure. I trust you, Yunho."

A mix of emotions flickers across his features - surprise, gratitude, and something else I can't quite decipher. He reaches out to cup my cheek gently, his touch sending shivers down my spine.

"I'm honoured you want to experience this with me," he whispers, his voice filled with a mix of tenderness and desire. "and that you trust me this much."

As our lips meet once again, the air around us crackles with anticipation. The intensity of our kisses deepens, fuelled by the understanding that we're about to share an intimate moment without any barriers.

"Tell me if anything feels uncomfortable," he murmurs against my lips, his breath mingling with mine. "We'll go at your pace."

I nod again, feeling safe in his embrace. The trust we've built over time allows me to let go of any lingering doubts or fears. Not just the trust we've built since we first met but from the second I walked into the apartment tonight to see him here. Our relationship shifted instantly in that second when I ran into his arms, realising the full extent of how much I had missed him.

Slowly, he eases me back onto the bed, our bodies pressed close together. His fingers linger on my skin as he trails soft kisses down my neck, his movements deliberate and unhurried. His hand moves between our bodies as my legs instinctively open further for him and hook around his waist, pulling him closer. He runs his tip over my slick folds, teasing my entrance.

His eyes hold mine, a silent question lingering in their depths. I answer by pressing my hips up against his, a clear invitation. He takes a deep breath, his gaze never leaving mine as he slowly starts to push inside. His touch is careful, considerate - a testament to the trust between us.

As he continues to push I feel a sharp sensation deep within. "Ah." I hiss.

"Sorry." he says stilling his hips

"It is ok, baby. It didn't hurt, just a bit of discomfort." I reply reaching for his face.

"Slow breaths." he whispers before kissing me "Just focus on my breathing, copy mine and I'll go a bit slower."

I close my eyes, focusing on the rhythm of our shared breaths. He eases in further, a gentle intrusion that sends a shiver up my spine. I bite my lower lip to stifle a moan, my hands moving to his arms for support. He pauses again, allowing me time to adjust to the new sensation. His thumb traces circles on my hip, a soothing gesture that helps me relax further.

"Better?" his voice is soft

"Much." I reply, feeling his head drop into my neck once more "Keep going."

Yunho continues this pace, taking it slow and steady until I feel his pelvic bone against mine. His voice trembles slightly as he asks, "How does it feel?" I sense his body tense above mine, his forearms shaking against the mattress on either side of my head. I continue take slow, deep breaths as he had instructed me to do.

"Erm..full.." I mumble concentrating on my breathing and relaxing completely

"In a bad way?" he inquires

"No," I shake my head fervently. "In a really, really amazing way!" I open my eyes and meet his gaze. "I just need a couple minutes to adjust, and then you can start moving."

He smiles at me and says, "Take as much time as you need, little one." But I can see the tension in his eyes, despite his attempt to hide it. "We have all night and we can stop whenever you want."

"Are you okay?" I ask reaching up to touch his face. This is new for him too.

"I am fine." he smiles back but it is tight and I can see how much he is holding back.

I gently pull his face down to mine. I'm not sure if this will only frustrate him more, being inside of me and unable to move, but when his body relaxes into mine and he responds to my kiss, I feel a sense of relief wash over me.

His lips gently meet mine as we engage in a slow and loving kiss, our tongues playfully intertwining. As I become more comfortable, I cautiously shift my hips to gauge his response. With just the slightest movement, his tip rubs my g-spot, causing me to let out a muted whine that gets lost between our mouths

He pulls away to whisper in my ear, "Are you ready for me to continue?" I nod eagerly, my body buzzing with excitement.

He slowly draws back his hips, almost completely out of me, but keeps the tip just inside before thrusting back in fully. A high-pitched whine escapes my mouth as I feel both full and a sharp sting, causing him to immediately stop. He looks down at me with worry etched on his face. "Are you alright, Luna?"

I shake my head. "I'm okay, it just caught me off guard."

"Do you want me to stop?" he asks

"No! Just move a little slower." I give him a reassuring smile and take his hand in mine as he starts moving again, this time at a gentler pace. "That's better... oh god, much better!" I moan as he hits my sweet spot perfectly.

His face drops onto the pillow under my head, my own face tucking into his neck for closeness. The feeling is unlike anything I've ever experienced before--his thickness and length stretching me just right--and I let out a loud moan into his neck as I clench around him after a particularly pleasurable thrust hits me hard.

"That's it, little one!" Encouraged by my response, he whispers into my ear as he begins to move faster, my hips meeting his in a rhythmic motion that has me arching up towards him. His free hand grips my hip tightly, pulling me closer as he buries himself deeper inside of me with each thrust. The bed creaks loudly underneath us as we begin to get into a steady rhythm; it's an intimate dance that feels so right between us.

I let out a whimper as I move my face away from his neck.

"Luna?" he asks, pulling back to look at me with concern. His pace slows down as he checks on me.

"Can you... go faster?" I gasp.

"Are you sure?" he asks, looking hesitant.

"Please! I need you," I plead, digging my fingernails into his back.

His eyes darken with desire as he nods in response to my plea. "Hold on tight, little one," he whispers, his voice husky with anticipation. "I'm going to give you everything you need."

With a surge of strength, he takes control, his thrusts becoming harder and faster. Each collision of our bodies sends waves of pleasure through me, building the tension coiled tightly within. I cling to him, my nails digging deeper into his back as I surrender myself completely to the ecstasy pulsating between us.

Feeling the intensity of our connection, he leans down to capture my lips once more. His kisses are urgent now, fuelled by our shared craving for completion. I break away from the kiss, gasping for breath but unable to form coherent words. He looks into my eyes, a desperate need mirrored in his gaze. "Tell me you're close," he pleads, his voice rough with need.

"Yes," I manage to gasp out, the word barely forming on my lips. "So close."

His movements become more erratic, his pace relentless as he chases our ultimate pleasure. The sounds of our bodies colliding mix with the symphony of our gasps and moans, filling the room with a symphony of raw desire.

As we approach the edge together, I feel a surge of electricity shooting through every fiber of my being. I arch my back, my body reaching its peak as a powerful climax crashes over me like a tidal wave. My moans are suddenly muted at the intense pleasure I am feeling as I claw at his arms to find purchase. Suddenly he pulls his hips back but my walls continue to clench around nothing. It isn't until I feel the hot wet release on my stomach and one final guttural moan from him that I realise he has come too.

"Oh fuck...that w-was..." he mumbles looking down at me, sweat dripping off his hair. "...fuck!" he collapses beside me. My legs flop to the bedding underneath me as we both try to catch our breaths and look up at the ceiling. The room is now darker than when we first entered it, the light from street below coming through the window.

As he turns his head to look at me, I do the same and lock my gaze with his. His eyes are a warm caramel brown, sparkling with a dazzling light. The faint glimmer of a thousand tiny stars reflecting in the depths of his gaze."How are you feeling, little one?" he asks, his voice soft and gentle.

"Like a bowl of jelly!" I reply, giggling at my own silliness. A smile plays on his lips as he raises an eyebrow in question.

"A what?" he laughs, his deep chuckle filling the room.

"All wobbly," I clarify, placing a small kiss on his shoulder. The warmth of his sweaty skin against my lips sends another shiver down my spine.

"Is feeling wobbly a compliment?" he replies playfully, turning onto his side to face me. His hand reaches out to tuck a stray strand of hair behind my ear. Our bodies tangled together, creating a cosy cocoon of warmth and comfort.

"Of course it is," I tease back, tracing patterns on his chest with my own fingers. "It means I'm so relaxed and happy that I feel like I could melt into a puddle."

He smiles softly, gazing at me with adoration in his eyes. "Well then, I hope you feel like a bowl of jelly every day."

"hmm..." I hum happily, "I've never had an orgasm that strong before." I add softly, grabbing his hand and kissing it. His sparkling eyes gaze into mine. "Yun, having an orgasm during sex is a new thing for me. I've never been able to with previous partners... until you all that is." I can feel myself getting a little shy at this admission, wondering if I am oversharing again. Yunho's gaze never wavers as he listens to me. He reaches out and delicately cups my cheek, his touch reassuring and gentle.

"I am glad that we can do that for you!" A soft laugh escapes him before his eyes soften looking at me. "I meant what I said earlier, I am here for you always and there is no pressure to tell me anything you don't want. I am here for more than just physical gratification, so lean on me whenever you need a moment of calm or silence and I'll give you that."

"Thank you," I respond softly, my voice laced with gratitude. "I appreciate you all more than any words could express."

Yunho's smile warms my heart as his thumb gently brushes against my cheekbone, offering comfort. "We're in this together," he reassures me before pressing his lips to mine. "As much as I'd love to stay right here with you, I should probably clean up the mess I made." We both laugh, momentarily forgetting about the sticky situation on my stomach. "I'll be back in a few minutes with some towels and we can spend the rest of the night snuggled under these covers."

My eyes follow Yunho as he strides across the room and exits through the door. The sound of his quick footsteps echoes down the hall and fades into the distance. I wipe the sweat from my forehead, my hair damp and unruly from our intense workout. In a rush, I gather up my hair and twist them tightly, using a pen from Yunho's bedside table to secure it in place. The room smells of musky cologne and lingering heat, a reminder of our passionate session just moments ago.

Yunho returns moments later carrying a stack of fluffy white towels and a warm, wet washcloth. My hand reaches out to take it from him, but he gently pushes me back onto the bed.

"Let me take care of this," he says with a chuckle, shaking his head as he kneels between my legs. "I got carried away and didn't know what to do."

"What do you mean?" I ask, curious.

"When I came. I realised in the moment that I never asked beforehand what to do in this situation. I panicked and pulled out," he explains, his gentle fingers moving over my stomach and between my legs with the washcloth. "I barely pulled out in time." I notice his ears begin to go red, which always happens when he feels embarrassed or awkward.

"I didn't even think about that," I giggle, feeling relaxed by his touch. "But don't worry about the mess, I didn't mind it. I'm also on birth control so there's no need to stress in the future about what to do."

Yunho's eyes meet mine, filled with a mix of relief and worry. "I'm glad you're using birth control," he says softly, his voice full of reassurance. "But if you have any concerns or want to try other options, we don't have to rely solely on that. I know some forms of contraception can have negative effects on your body and hormones, and I don't want you putting yourself through that for our sake."

"I've been taking it for a while now and haven't had any bad reactions. Well, nothing major anyway. The best part is not having a period some months, which is heaven!" I let out a light laugh. "But thank you for thinking about it; most guys don't." I smile at him. "I hope you don't mind, I used the pen from your cabinet to pin my hair up. I didn't have a hair tie and it was bothering me." I add as he finishes cleaning me up.

"Of course I don't mind but I don't want the pen to ruin your hair. Tell me where you keep your hair ties, I'll go down and get some. That way you can leave a couple here so you always have them on hand." he smiles

"I have a clear box in my bathroom next to the sink that has loads of them." I answer

"Get yourself under the covers and I'll be back in a few minutes." he kisses me before putting his boxers on and running back out the room.

I slide under his warm covers and lie back on the bed, plumping the pillow under my head a bit more and find myself smiling like a lunatic as my thoughts wander to how I got to this very moment. A couple of hours ago I walked into the apartment, thinking I was completely alone only to see Yunho was there, had wanted to surprise me and we ended up caught in an unexpected adventure.

The realisation then hits me like a ton of bricks that I was with Mingi this morning. Which means I've slept with two different men in the span of 12 hours. My stomach churns and I bite my lower lip nervously. While I know that what I did wasn't inherently wrong since I am in a relationship with both of them, it's still something I've never done before. Not even in the same week, let alone on the same day.

"Are you doing alright, little one?" I hear Yunho's voice as he returns with a handful of colourful scrunchies.

I start to say that I'm fine, but then I remember what Seonghwa told me the other night about being able to talk to them about the others. However, I am uncertain if everyone is as receptive to this idea as Seonghwa is.

"Actually, not really," I admit sitting upright as Yunho sits down next to me.

His big brown eyes meet mine and he asks, "What's wrong?"

After a moment of hesitation, I reply, "I just remembered this morning.. I was with one of the others, and now here we are tonight." I pause, debating whether or not to mention Mingi by name.

He looks at me with a softened gaze and asks, "Do you feel like you've done something wrong?"

"A little bit. "I nod in response.

He pulls me into his embrace and says, "Oh Luna..."

He embraces me as I speak, "I understand that we are all in a relationship together, so it's not a problem. But I don't want any of you to see me differently." My voice trails off towards the end, "Or label me as promiscuous."

He pulls his head back to look at me while still holding me in his arms. "We would never think of you that way," he reassures me. "Our relationship may not fit societal norms, and there are those who would judge or make assumptions if they knew, but we would never do that."

"My rational side understands that you wouldn't do this, but my insecurities are telling me otherwise. They constantly whisper that one day all of you, or at least one person, will change your minds and tell me to leave. I despise this aspect of my mind."

"Don't feel insecure in our relationship. We would never tell you leave! We all deeply care for you, more than you may even realise. Every single one of us! It's not just about physical attraction or sex - it's about the connection we have with you. Without that spark that we all felt when we met you, we never would have pursued this kind of polyamorous dynamic. I understand that to others, it would seem taboo, but we all know the truth and that's what truly matters." He reassures me. "And anyway, it is no ones business what we all do!"

Yunho always knows the right words to say. And he is right, I felt an instant spark too the second I walked into the room to see who it was I was now working with.

"So don't worry about being with us on the same day, we don't mind it and certainly wouldn't judge you. If we did, we'd be judging ourselves too!" he continues.

"Ah, I know you are right. I'll try to silence that voice in my head that tries to tell me the opposite." I sigh lightly

"You don't have to silence it completely. You can always talk to one of us, anyone of us! We will put any worries or concerns to rest." he reassures me. "As long as you're happy and it's what you truly want. Don't ever feel obligated to do anything with any of us."

I respond, "I never have felt that way. The things I've done so far have all been by choice, without any pressure or expectations."

"That is all we want for you." he says placing a kiss on my forehead. "Did you feel like a bowl of jelly this morning?" he adds a hint of playfulness in his tone after a couple of minutes comfortable silence

"Yeah." I let out a small giggle as I know he won't let me forget my post coitus brain fart anytime soon

"Then that is a good thing. Now lets get that pen out your hair and go to sleep." he says

Gently, Yunho removes the pen that was holding my hair up. I grab a scrunchie from the ones he brought up and tie my hair into a bun. As I do this, I see him take off his boxers and climb under the covers.

"Are you expecting another round tonight?" I laugh as he cuddles into me.

"Not at all." he laughs, "I prefer to sleep without clothes on, but unfortunately certain individuals tend to interrupt my mornings. Those people are thankfully away so I know I am safe! I can get a shirt for you to wear if you don't want to sleep naked."

"No, I'm comfortable like this," I smile back at him.

Yunho leans in and gently presses his lips against mine. The kiss is sweet and unhurried, conveying all the intimacy and affection that words fail to express.

Eventually, we break apart, our foreheads resting against each other as we catch our breaths. We exchange knowing glances, silently understanding that this night will forever hold a special place in our hearts.

With a lingering touch, Yunho pulls up the covers and tucks them tightly around us. I turn around and press my back into his chest, feeling his arms around my body.

"If you wake up in the middle of the night with a boner poking your butt, I apologise!" he chuckles quietly causing me to giggle too.

"Yun!!" I laugh reaching behind to lightly hit his butt.

"Good night little one." he whispers into my ear

"Good night, baby." I reply before letting out a long and loud yawn

As sleep starts to claim us both, I snuggle closer to him, cherishing this peaceful moment before dreams take over.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

My eyes snap open as the blaring sound of my alarm pierces through the quiet room, and I feel a warm weight shift on top of my legs. I groggily reach out towards the noise, clumsily hitting the snooze button on the flashing screen. As I run a hand through my tangled hair that had fallen out of the bun during the night, I take in the unfamiliar surroundings of Yunho's bedroom. Quickly, last night's events come back to me and a satisfied smile spreads across my face. Glancing at Yunho sleeping next to me, his bare chest rising and falling peacefully, I snuggle deeper into the warmth of the soft covers and melt back into his embrace. He lets out a deep groan, his arms automatically pulling me into him.

When my second alarm goes off I quickly turn it off and gently remove myself from his arms without waking him. My naked body shivers at how cold his room is compared to the warmth of his body and the covers. I search around his bedroom floor for my clothes but I can't find my panties. I look everywhere but I have no idea where they went.

The last I saw of them Yunho had removed them with his teeth and thrown them over his shoulder. I decide to give up looking for them as I really need to get a shower. I swiftly put my dress and cardigan on and shove my bra into the pocket. There was no need to put it on as I was just going downstairs to my own bedroom and getting straight into the shower.

I glance over at Yunho, still peacefully asleep, and a pang of guilt hits me. I know I have to wake him up, even though I don't want to. I don't want him to wake up and find me gone without saying anything, making him think he did something wrong.

"Yunho?" I whisper, my hand gently shakes his shoulder

"hmm." he mumbles, his eyes opening slightly "Luna?" his voice is the deepest I have ever heard it

"I didn't want to leave you without telling you." I say softly sitting on the side of his bed. "I need to get a shower before I leave for work."

"Why are you working today? We are still on a break!" he says sitting up, his eyes opening wider and I can see he is trying to wake up more.

"YOU are still on a break, but I go back today!" I giggle, fixing his dishevelled hair.

"But why are you working when we aren't?" he asks, his perfect lips begin to pout

I gently kiss his pouting lips and say, "I don't just work with Ateez, you know. I have a meeting today to discuss the upcoming trip to America and I'm also meeting with the new band."

"I thought they were getting their own tutor though?" he asks

"They will at some point, probably after their debut. However for now when I am here in Korea and not on tour with you guys, I will be working with them as well as you all." I answer

"But won't that be more work for you?" he asks, concern evident in his tone.

"Not at all. It may seem like it, but it's actually less hours than when I worked at the hotel." I assure him as I smile at him

"I'm sorry, if i knew you were working today then I wouldn't have kept you up most of the night." he says

"It isn't my first time working after a long night of sex!" I grin mischievously as I plant a kiss on his lips "And I doubt it will be my last." I add with a playful wink.

"I don't doubt it either." he chuckles kissing me back "How are you feeling this morning? Any discomfort?" he whispers against my lips

"I am a little bit tender but I am fine! Don't worry about me." I say

"I'm sorry. I didn't want you to feel that way. I had planned to actually wait on you hand and foot the day after we were together, in case you were hurting." he says and I can see he looks a little disappointed. "I didn't want you to do anything that would make it worse."

"Next time I promise I will let you spoil me the entire day. I'll stay in bed, won't even lift a muscle or do anything." I wrap my arms around his shoulders.

"Oh I like the thought of having you in my bed all day." he grins

"I am sure you do!!" I laugh "I will be fine today though, so don't fret." I smile at him. "Before I forget, you will need to find my panties later on," I add, a mischievous twinkle in my eye. "They mysteriously disappeared last night when you tossed them away and I couldn't find them."

"Are you serious?" He chuckles as I stand up from the bed. "So, does that mean you're not wearing any underwear right now?" His eyebrows raise suggestively.

A naughty idea pops into my head as I walk towards his bedroom door. I turn around, pull on the hem of my dress and flash him a teasing glimpse of my bare lower half before he collapses onto the bed with an exaggerated groan. "You're going to be the death of me, Luna!" he grumbles, but there's a hint of amusement in his voice as I giggle playfully.

"I will see you later." I say before leaving his room

I hear him groan again as I descend the stairs. Once I've showered, dried off and gotten dressed, I get my usual 2 pills from the bottom of my make up bag and head to the kitchen. Yeosang is already there, pouring himself a cup of coffee. I quickly slip the medication into the pocket of my jeans so he doesn't see them.

"Good morning, angel." he greets me with a smile and pulls me into his embrace for a kiss. "Do you want some coffee?"

Yeosang knows by now that my usual morning drink of choice is tea and only coffee when I am exhausted so it is unusual for him to ask me if I want one. I wonder if he knew what happened last night with Yunho. Maybe he and Mingi came home earlier than they planned and heard us?

"Yes, please!" I answer.

I can see a sly grin appear on his face as I let go of him. That grin is a little suspicious.

"How was your dinner and movie last night?" I ask getting a bottle of water from the fridge.

Yeosang retrieves my thermal mug from the cupboard, while his back is turned I quickly unscrew the lid and pop the two pills into my mouth. Taking a gulp of water, I try to hide my discomfort at taking them without anyone knowing. I hate doing this.

Last night, I almost blurted it out to Yunho, but I was so grateful when he stopped me and reassured me that I could tell him when I was ready. Despite feeling guilty for causing him to worry about me, I knew I wasn't prepared to reveal my bipolar just yet.

"It was good. The place Mingi picked for dinner was really nice! We should all go there one night." he replies as he pours the coffee into the mug and screws the lid onto it. "I asked them what their policy on seafood allergies was and there is a menu dedicated to food allergies!"

"Sounds good!" I smile replacing the cap of the water bottle and sitting it beside my work bag on the kitchen island so I don't forget to take it with me

"How was your afternoon with your family?" he asks

"Amazing!" I smile, "The twins are so big now, my mom still telling everyone within earshot I am allergic to things and my dad just being my dad."

"I am glad you had an amazing time." he smiles placing my thermal mug beside my bag.

"Sorry about my cousins yesterday, also my aunt and uncle." I say to him as he sits down on a bar stool "They can be quite full on sometimes especially my cousins!"

"Honestly, it's alright. I was a little unsure of how to interact with them, but I didn't mean to leave so suddenly. I was afraid they would figure something out," he responds while I pack a banana and a small container of strawberries in my bag for later. "I'm sorry for running off like that, angel."

"No need to apologise, I completely understand. I'm just relieved that you were okay," I tell him as I lean over and give him a kiss. His lips are perfectly situated for me to reach while sitting on the bar stool; in fact, I've noticed all of them seem to be at the perfect kissing height when on the bar stools!

"There were some bags with snacks inside them on the lounge floor last night. I put everything into your sections of the pantry, hope that is ok." he says pulling me to sit on his knee

"oh shit!! Sorry, I completely forgot about those," I say apologetically as I gently tap my head in annoyance at my forgetfulness

"It's alright, I figured they got forgotten in the midst of all the excitement from your surprise last night," he smirks and I put one arm around his shoulders, the other holding onto his hand.

"Wait, you knew Yunho was coming back yesterday?" I ask in shock.

"Who do you think paid for our dinner and movie?" he laughs.

I can feel myself start to blush as I realise that Yeosang must know what happened between me and Yunho last night, which is why he asked if I wanted coffee. My cheeks heat up with embarrassment at the thought of him knowing about Yunho and I spending the night together.

"Don't be embarrassed." he says softly

As Yeosang's lips gently pressed against my heated cheek, I feel a mixture of surprise and comfort wash over me. I turn to face him, noticing how his eyes shimmer with understanding. There was a gentle warmth in his gaze, as if he knew just how much I needed his reassurance in that moment. It was as if he saw through all the tangled emotions that churned inside me, offering solace without judgement.

"You don't need to worry about what we think of you angel, other than that we all care for you greatly!" he says

"How did you...?"

"Yunho spoke to me last night. I was having some food in the kitchen after we came back and he had come down for some water. I could tell he had something on his mind and I pestered him until he told me so don't be annoyed at him." Yeosang answers

"I'm not." I smile at him and I genuinely mean it. I am not annoyed at all, in fact I am glad he spoke to Yeosang if it was playing on his mind.

"All he told me is that you were worried about us judging you for being with all of us. I know being in a relationship with 8 men isn't typical and it is only natural for you to feel this way, just talk to us. Tell us what is going on inside your head so we can help." he says

I can't fathom why I am so lucky to have not just one, but eight understanding men in my life. To ease my mind, I make a silent promise to stop dwelling on it. It only adds stress for myself and unnecessary worry for them. Yeosang holds my hand and gives me a comforting smile. "We're always here for you."

Leaning in, I kiss him softly and he returns the gesture. "Thank you," I whisper with parted lips, "What do you have planned for today?"

"Gym and then some tidying up before Seonghwa gets home. He likes to do a full house inspection when hes been away for a few days." he answers "What is your work day looking like?"

"Meeting the new band and then a meeting. I am hoping to be home before 4pm." I answer as my phone notification goes off and I pull it from my pocket. "Speaking of which, Myeonjin is in the garage downstairs so I should go."

With a gentle hand, Yeosang helps me to my feet and leads me towards the door. It has become our daily routine - he gently slips on my sneakers for me, tying each lace with care. As I turn to leave, he pulls me in for a kiss goodbye, the warmth of his lips lingering on mine as I step into the lift that will take me down to the private garage. I feel like today will be a good day.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Work went by relatively fast. I had a meeting with the new band that would be debuting soon and briefly got to know them. Some of the members were already good in their English and were helping the others but it was definitely time for them to have a proper tutor to allow them to focus on their upcoming debut. I was excited to get started with them and they all seemed eager too.

The meeting to discuss the upcoming schedules was a monotonous affair, with the usual dry presentations and endless charts. However, amidst all the official business, there were constant glances and hushed whispers coming from Chaeyoung and Iseul. My patience was beginning to wear thin as their actions seemed to be specifically directed towards me once again. I couldn't understand why they were singling me out like this.

In normal circumstances I wouldn't hesitate to call them out for it, I've never had a problem standing up for this type of shit but with my relationship with the guys I knew I needed to bite my tongue. I didn't want them to know there was an issue between us and if I said something it might get back to them. Hyunsik kept telling me to ignore them while quietly imitating Chaeyoung flicking her hair and checking her nails which caused me to nearly burst out laughing a few times.

However, that was now behind me and I was just excited to get home. As soon as I walk through the door, I can hear the sound of the vacuum running in the lounge, letting me know that Seonghwa is home. I kick off my shoes and make my way to the room, where I see him with his back facing me. Even from behind, he looks cute as he goes about his cleaning routine, probably something he's been itching to do while he was away at his parents' house.

With a soft thud, I toss my bag onto the plush sofa and step closer to him. As I approach him, I can feel my heart flutter with excitement at seeing him again. My arms wrap snugly around his waist, and I feel his body jump lightly.

"That better be Luna or else!" he chuckles switching off the machine

"What if it isn't?" I say playfully

"Extra cleaning duty!" he replies before turning around to look down at me

"Just as well it is me then!" I chuckle with a mischievous glint in my eye, "Hi!" I grin up at him and rise on my tiptoes to wrap my arms around his broad shoulders.

"Hi!" he smiles back at me. He meets me halfway, leaning down to encircle my waist with his strong arms. As our lips meet, I can't help but let out a joyful laugh. The warmth of his embrace and the taste of his kiss making me feel alive and happy.

"It feels amazing to be back home," he happily exclaims as his hands glide over my back. "I loved seeing my family, but I missed you and your adorable face every day!"

"I missed you too," I reply. From my emotional reaction to Yunho's surprise return the night before I know I will likely be feeling just as emotional when the others come back as well. I don't want to cry in front of them like I did with Yunho last night, so I swallow down the lump in my throat, peck his cheek and smile up at him. "Was the house a bit messy?" I ask him, trying to distract myself from my emotions, motioning towards the vacuum

“Actually, it was quite clean this time.” He remarks. “Not that the others make a mess, but when I’m not around, things tend to get a bit disorganised. But I was pleasantly surprised.”

“I’ve been trying to keep things tidy with the others. I know Yeosang cleaned this morning while I was at work.” I add.

"I'm only vacuuming because it's my usual routine when I come home," he explains, playfully planting kisses on my cheek. "So I know you just got home from work and I want so much to spend time with you right now but I need to shower before we meet your parents tonight."

"Go shower!" I say letting go of him but he pulls me back into his arms and kissing me softly

"Not until I get my kisses!" he smiles against my lips

I break the kiss and playfully push him away. "You can have all the kisses you want after your shower," I tease, winking at him.

Seonghwa pouts dramatically, pretending to be upset. "But I need them now," he says in a mock whiny voice, making me giggle.

I run my fingers through his hair affectionately. "You'll survive without a few kisses," I assure him playfully. "Besides, I have to get ready too and we don't want my parents thinking we're running late, do we?"

He grins mischievously and leans in closer, his warm breath against my ear. "Maybe a shower together then?" he suggests, his voice low and seductive.

My cheeks flush with heat at his suggestion, and I playfully swat his arm. "Behave yourself, mister," I scold him teasingly. "Save that idea for when we have more time." If it wasn't for the fact we are going to my parents for dinner I would 100% have took him up on his offer but I know we'd get rather distracted and if we were running late it would only add to my anxiety over how tonight will go.

Seonghwa chuckles and playfully nuzzles the side of my neck, leaving a trail of soft kisses along my jawline. "Alright, alright," he concedes, reluctantly pulling away.

I watch him as he unplugs the vacuum and leaves the room with it, admiring the way his broad shoulders fill out his shirt. As he disappears from sight, I take a moment to compose myself before heading to my bedroom to change out of my work clothes.

I take a speedy shower and get dressed for dinner. I spend what feels like hours deciding on an outfit, but finally decide on a pair of black dress pants, a white t-shirt, and a grey cardigan. Once my make-up is done, I head into the living room to find Yunho and Mingi engrossed in a game on the ps5.

"I didn't realise you were home!" Yunho smiles as he sees me

"A little bit ago." I answer

"Must have been when Mingi and I were down at the store getting snacks for our big game night!" he replies

As I open my mouth to respond, Seonghwa turns the corner. He's dressed in black pants and a dark grey shirt, looking incredibly handsome. My stomach flutters as I take in his appearance.

"Oh my god, it's like we coordinated our outfits!" I laugh, noticing our matching colours.

"Looks like our telepathic connection is going strong," he joins in with a smile. "But what do you think of my outfit?" he asks nervously, showing it off with open arms.

"It's perfect. You look amazing," I reply sincerely.

"As do you," he kisses me softly. "I just need to fix my hair and then we can go." He grins at me. "Hey Yunho, do you mind if I borrow some styling gel? I think I left mine at my parents' house."

"Sure, 2nd floor bathroom beside the sink." Yunho replies

"Thanks!" he says "I'll be quick." he adds to me kissing my cheek as I smile back at him

"Take your time, we don't need to be there for another 40 minutes and it is only a 5 minute walk away." I say

"I promise I won't be long." he says softly

After he exits the room, I take a seat next to Yunho to watch their game as I wait. He surprises me by leaning over and giving me a kiss on the lips, something he's never done in front of the others before. If anyone else has ever seen us kissing, it was because they walked in on us.

"How was work today?" he asks

"It was good," I reply.

"And... are you feeling less tender?" he asks quietly so Mingi doesn't hear, his eye filled with concern.

"I am!" I nod, reassuring him. He smiles and leans in for another kiss, and I willingly oblige. His comfort and display of affection in front of Mingi make me happy. I'm not sure if our night together sparked this change, but he wasn't wrong when he said it would bring us closer; I already feel a stronger connection between us.

"By the way, I found your underwear, it had somehow landed on my desk chair." he whispers "I put them in with my clothes washing, they are drying in my room so I can give you them tomorrow."

I go to reply thanks but his lips capture mine once more before I can. He is definitely a lot more comfortable in show his affection!

"Dude, your character is about to die!" Mingi laughs causing us to break apart. Yunho sighs playfully as he looks over at Mingi. "What?! It's true!"

I can tell from the expression on Mingi's face and the tone of his voice that he is purposely teasing Yunho. I wrap my arms around his, resting my head on his shoulder as he picks up his controller. I gently run my fingers along his arm while I watch him play the game. I'm not sure what they're playing, but they appear to be on the same team as they work together to defeat whatever enemy is against them. Being here with them brings me great happiness. Seonghwa returns to the lounge after 20 minutes, looking effortlessly put together with his perfectly styled hair.

"Okay, I think I am ready!" he says "I bought the wine earlier that you suggested and the chocolates too. They are in the kitchen so I'll get them and we can go."

I feel a nervous flutter in my stomach as he goes into the kitchen and I let go of Yunho to stand up.

"Enjoy your dinner at your parents and just relax." I hear Yunho say standing up as well. I turn to face him and find myself putting my arms around his waist without thinking. Thankfully he returns my embrace and kisses the top of my head.

"I will." I reply. "I have my crystal with me." I add pulling it from my pocket to show him. A wide smile spreads across his face as he looks at it, his hands cupping my cheeks and tilting my head upwards for a kiss.

"I hope it's of use." He speaks softly.

"I'll catch up with you tomorrow!" I reply, "Have fun with your game night guys!"

"More like the night Yunho gets crushed!" Mingi jokes, standing up from his seat.

"You wish!" Yunho chuckles as I walk over to give Mingi a hug and a kiss.

"You look stunning, like always, my princess." Mingi whispers in my ear before pulling away. "Enjoy dinner with your parents and Seonghwa."

I turn to find Seonghwa has brought back the wine and chocolates. Before we leave for the hallway, I give Yunho a brief embrace and kiss as well. Once our shoes are on and my coat is securely fastened with his help, Seonghwa asks me, "Are you ready?" I smile and nod before he opens the door. As we make our way towards the elevator, I take a deep breath and quietly pray that my mother doesn't suspect anything about our relationship.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

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hwaberry-dreams · 4 months

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I have added a small profile on my description. Feel free to unfollow me if my age bothers you, I’ve always been honest about being older than most Atiny and having a teenager too but my age is now there. I won’t be offended if anyone does decide to unfollow me. 🌸

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hwaberry-dreams · 5 months

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SIXTEEN: baking and comfort

Warnings: swearing, oral (f receiving), fingering, slightly rough sex, protected sex Word Count: 8.1k (taglist is now at the bottom) Summary: While the others are away visiting their families, Luna is feeling their absence deeply. Mingi is there to distract her from missing them, until she finally reunites with her parents and sisters. The reunion is a mixture of emotions, and when Luna comes home afterwards, there is a special surprise waiting for her.

Mingi's voice echoes down the hallway, "What is that scent? It smells delicious!" I hear him say. I place the tray on the counter top and close the oven door as he walks into the kitchen.

"It's scones," I reply, taking off my oven mitt and placing it neatly beside me. "I've made them mostly for my sisters but I've made extra for here too in case any of you want one."

"You made cupcakes and an apple pie yesterday, plus a chicken dinner! This morning was pancakes at breakfast, and now you're making scones? You are making sure we are very well fed!" He grins at me.

The previous morning, I had been struck with a sudden burst of baking inspiration, so I made my way to the grocery store. There, I decided to make myself a roast chicken dinner, complete with a side of buttery mashed potatoes and roasted vegetables - the ultimate comfort meal that my mom would make for me whenever I was feeling down. Although I wasn't particularly low yesterday, I was missing Yunho, Seonghwa, Hongjoong, Wooyoung and San; this gave me all the more reason to make this comforting meal.

The guys had all been in contest contact with me through texts. San would call me every night to tell me about his day, what he did with his family, things he did with his cat Byeol. They all also sent me lots of photos and messages throughout the day. Despite how nice it was still being able to talk with them, there's no denying that I missed their physical presence around me.

I felt a small pang of guilt for missing them when I was enjoying the company of Yeosang, Mingi and Jongho so much. We were all having a blast. Yesterday morning, Jongho tried to teach me how to break open an apple with just my hands. After using up an entire bag of apples, I finally managed to split off a tiny piece from the last apple and he cheered like I had accomplished something grand. Surprisingly, I did feel somewhat proud of myself. All of the apples used during the apple breaking process were not wasted at all as I made an apple pie with them!

In the afternoon, Mingi was working on a new song, letting me sit in his bedroom with him as he composed it. I simply watched him with a smile on my face until he asked me to sit on his lap and showed me how to put together a track.

Watching Yeosang, Mingi and Jongho eating the roast chicken dinner so enthusiastically and genuinely enjoying it brought so much joy to my heart and a bubble of excitement in my stomach too. Afterwards we had another movie night and it was nice having time with the 3 of them.

“I just like cooking for you all!” I laugh. “I can stop if you wish me to.”

“Hey! I am not complaining. I love your cooking, princess!” Mingi says, leaning down to kiss me. “I just need to add extra reps during my workouts now every time you cook for us as your portions are massive!” He laughs.

"My apologies, that's from my grandma! She believes in cooking huge portions of food, and it's something that I've inherited from her." I giggle, "You know my opinion regarding you all dieting and all that stuff but I can serve smaller portions if you'd like?"

“Don’t! Not for me anyway!” He kisses me again. “And yes, very aware of your opinions on diets given your long rant last night when Yeosang simply said steamed vegetables are healthier than roasted!” He laughs wickedly.

I cringe and groan as I remember it. Poor Yeosang made an innocent comment, and I launched into how roasted vegetables are tastier and, if cooked correctly (with less oil!) can be just as healthy as steamed. When I finally stopped, his eyes were wide, and he looked so stunned.

“I am so sorry for that! I have a tendency to get rather opinionated with food! Again, that’s my grandma’s influence!” I reply, covering my face as his body moves around to stand behind me.

“I like you aren’t afraid to say how you feel or what you think. It’s very refreshing when we are surrounded by people who tell us what they think we want to hear,” he says, wrapping his arms around me as I move the scones to the cooling rack. “So never ever apologise for it and keep being yourself too!” I feel his face bury into my neck.

I know my opinions can annoy people and the fact I am outspoken too can be off-putting to a lot of people but Mingis words make me feel warm inside.

We move into the lounge and settle down on the sofa, with Mingi cuddling in close to me. I can't help but smile as I realise how comfortable he is with being around me. It's something I never even expected from him when we first met. His tall stature and dark eyes were a bit intimidating on our first meeting.

“Did your family arrive safely last night?” he asks

“Yeah, they did." I answer

"How was their flight from London?"

"Long! My mom text when they arrived at their rental apartment. She said the twins were already asleep while my dad was snoring on the sofa.” I chuckle and place my arms over the top of his. “The girls messaged this morning telling me all about the view from their apartment.”

“Is their apartment far from here?” He asks

“It is actually just 2 blocks away! Soojin said they can see Han River from the lounge window, so I think their apartment faces the same direction ours does.” I smile. “I can’t wait to see them later on. They'll be so big from the last time I saw them 8 months ago!”

Mingi pulls me closer to his chest. "I am sure you are going to have so much fun with them. Maybe one day you and I should take them out. Show them the fun places in Seoul." he says

"I was planning to take them to Lotte World. We should take them there. If you don't mind crazy hyper twins that is!" I smile at him wanting to do something with them.

"I've lived with San and Wooyoung for years, even during trainee period, I am sure Soojin and Hyejin will be a breeze compared to them!" he laughs, his voice has a hint of excitement.

As we cuddle together on the couch, I can’t help but think of the others and how much I miss them. A dull ache hits my chest at how much, more than I had ever expected to. A pang of guilt then follows for thinking of them while still being in Mingi’s embrace.

“Are you alright?” He asks me, his lips resting on the crown of my head.

"I'm fine," I reply, nodding slightly.

"You seemed to zone out a bit there for a moment," he remarks softly. "You were pretty quiet last night after dinner too."

"We were watching a movie with Yeosang and Jongho; it wouldn't have made much sense to talk," I joke in response.

"I know that," he replies with a chuckle, "but something seemed to be bothering you—you went upstairs right after to play with your friends on Sans' computer and then I saw you asleep in his bed in the middle of the night." His tone softens.

He is correct. I ended up sleeping in Sans bed last night when our game was finished. As I had sat in the silence of Sans bedroom once I had turned off the PC, I began to miss him. I only intended to lie on his bed for a few minutes, to soak in his scent before I went back to my room but the comfort of his belongings surrounding me made me feel a bit more emotional.

In an attempt to hold back the tears that wanted to escape I closed my eyes as tight as I could and hugged his pillow. The next thing I knew my phone alarm was going off on Sans desk and it was the next morning. I didn't realise Mingi had seen me in there but it explains the blanket over me that hadn't been there before when I woke up this morning.

"I wasn't snooping, I just saw the light on while I was going to the toilet and went in to turn it off and saw you asleep." he swiftly clarifies.

"I am missing the others." I admit, there is no point in trying to hide it. Mingi can easily pick up on peoples emotions.

"I thought as much." he sighs softly. "Come here." He pulls me onto his lap; I lay my head into his chest and try to control the tears welling up in my eyes.

"Sorry." I whisper, shedding a few that manage to break free. "I shouldn't be missing them when I have this time with you, Yeosang and Jongho!"

"Don't be sorry." He whispers back, tightening his grip around me; it feels like he will never let me go. "It's perfectly normal to miss them." His thumb brushes away the tears from my cheeks. "I know they are missing you as well." This causes me to lift my head from his chest and look up at him, meeting his eye to see if he is being truthful with me.

"Really?" I ask, surprised

"Of course they are!" The way he looks at me, so sweetly makes my heart flutter and warmth spreads through my body as he brings his lips down on mine.

The kiss starts off softly, his lips moving against mine with tenderness as his hands caress my back. I can't help but melt into him as the kiss turns heated and we stay locked in it for what feels like an eternity. He eventually pulls away, leaving us both breathless.

"I'm glad you are here with me." I whispers against his lips before kissing him once more.

Mingi deepens the kiss, his hands sliding down to grip my waist. I sigh into his mouth, heat pooling low in my belly.

We break apart, breathless. Mingi's eyes have darkened with desire and I feel an answering ache between my legs.

"Yeosang just went downstairs to the gym and Jongho's with his family today," I say softly, my lips brush against his. "I have 2 hours before I need to leave and the apartment's empty. Should we continue this somewhere more private?"

Mingi's lips curve in a slow, sensual smile. "Private? If we have the entire apartment to ourselves why not do it right here?"

I joke, my voice light and teasing, "We could do that, but wouldn't it be more comfortable in my bed?" I flash a mischievous grin and slide my hand down his body, feeling the hardness of his arousal. "You can be as rough as you want with me in there too." I squeeze him through his shorts.

"You make a good argument," he replies with a groan, embracing me as he stands up. I giggle with excitement, looping my arms around his neck, my legs hooking around his waist. As soon as we get into my room, he slams the door shut behind us with his foot. "One day we are going to fuck on that sofa!" He laughs.

"100%!" I reply in agreement.

He lowers me onto the bed and joins me, pinning me underneath him with his body. We kiss passionately while I run my fingers through his hair, over his broad shoulders and down his back. Mingi sits back on his heels and strips off his shirt in one smooth motion, revealing the definition of his torso. I can't help but let out a soft moan at the sight of him, and I feel an overwhelming wave of desire consume me.

He looks at me with a smug smirk and asks, "Do you like what you see, princess?"

"Of course!" I laugh back.

He helps me out of my clothes and his own with eager and quick hands until we are both naked. Mingi lowers himself back down onto me, his lips travelling hungrily over my body. He kisses me passionately, his hands caressing every inch of my body until I am writhing beneath him. His mouth moves lower, kissing and gently sucking on my skin. His tongue pays particular attention to my nipples before moving lower still. I can feel his hot breath on my core, my legs shake in anticipation of his next move.

"Mingi..." I moan, my voice trembling as I look down at him.

"Does my princess want me to eat her out?" he says, his voice low and seductive as his eyes darken with desire. Unable to find words, I simply nod in response. He places one of his hands over my lower abdomen, gently pressing down to keep me still as his other hand cups my wetness. His lips move up my inner thighs, lightly brushing against them with every kiss until they finally reach my core. His fingers slip inside me as his tongue circles my clit, sending shock waves of pleasure through my body. His mouth moves with precision, alternating between teasing licks and hard sucks as the sensations threaten to overwhelm me. With a final gasp of pleasure, I collapse onto the mattress.

He finally stops and looks up at me, grinning, as I come hard against his mouth and fingers. He pulls away slowly, licking his lips before giving me a lingering kiss that leaves me breathless. I look into his eyes and see a satisfied look that only comes from knowing he pleased me to the fullest.

Mingi picks up a condom from my bedside table and slips it on, then moves over me with his forearms serving as support. I wrap my legs around him, pulling him towards me as he enters me. We both moan in pleasure at the feeling of being together. His forehead pressed firmly against mine.

"Ahh! You feel amazing!" he grunts out between breaths. "You're so perfect for me."

He moves in a steady rhythm, angle his hips to precisely target that secret spot inside me that he knows so well from our night together. Each thrust inside of me sparks a thrill up my spine, intensifying until I can hardly bear it. I cling onto his back, panting out his name as his thrusts become faster and more intense, his breathing heavy as he nears his climax. I can feel him trembling above me, the tension in his body building until it is almost unbearable. I wrap my arms around him, clinging onto him as we both soar towards our peaks. One of his hands moves to my hips, his fingers dig into me as he firmly holds my body down onto the mattress.

The heat within me suddenly breaking apart in a wave of blissful release as I cry out loudly, my nails digging into his skin. Riding the wave of my release, Mingi continues his brutal pace, growing frantic as he buries his face into the crook of my neck and cries out with a deep guttural rumble. The intensity of his orgasm causes him to shake violently.

We lie there, completely exhausted and still entwined together, saying nothing but communicating though our eye contact in the comfortable silence that envelops us. A satisfied smile crosses my face while I bask in the post-orgasmic joy and Mingi's presence, his hand softly caressing my cheek. Sweet kisses and smiles being exchanged as we come down from our highs.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

I walk into the lounge from my bedroom and see Yeosang sitting on the sofa causing my heart to flutter. After Mingi and I had our fun earlier, we went for a shower. As I was getting ready to the lunch he left to go to gym. Yeosang must have came back earlier and is now playing a game on the ps5 but puts it on pause when he sees me come in. He places the controller on the coffee table as I walk over to him.

"You look beautiful!" he smiles at me as he stands up, his hand reaches out for mine and he laces our fingers together. He places a soft kiss against my lips and another on my forehead.

I chose to wear a knee length, beige dress for lunch with my family and threw on an oversized white cardigan as well. My hair is in loose curls and I have braided my long bangs, securing them with a clip against the side of my head so they are out of my face. To complete the look, I kept my makeup simple.

"Thank you." I say lowering my head as I can feel the blush flush over my cheeks.

His fingers tilt my chin up to look at him. "I love when you wear your glasses." I chose to forego my contact lenses and stick with my eye glasses. It isn't something I normally do when I go out. The only time I wear my glasses outside is when I go for my morning run or at the store. "I love the way your glasses look on you! They bring out your eyes and make you look even more beautiful." I feel myself blush even more. I'm not quite sure how to respond to it.

"Come here, angel." he pulls me into his arms. I instantly feel the warmth of his body and melt into him. “Mingi and I are going for a meal with Myeonjin then to see a movie so we won't be here when you get home."

"That sounds like fun!" I say, burying my face in the crook of his neck. I inhale his scent, he is fresh out the shower and smells like a mixture of coconuts and vanilla.

"Jongho should be home by 10pm. Do you think you will be okay here by yourself for a while?" His hands rubbing soft circles on my back

"Please, I lived alone in a tiny studio apartment for two years! A few hours by myself won't faze me!" I smile at his concern. He leans down, our lips meeting in a gentle sweet kiss. His lips are soft and warm, caressing mine with each movement. His hands cup my face as he deepens the kiss, exploring every corner of my mouth. I feel my body heat up with pleasure as his tongue slides against mine in a perfect dance that makes me forget what we were talking about.

When we finally break apart, I'm breathless and my heart is pounding in my chest. We stand there for a few moments, just looking into each other's eyes like nothing else matters in this world but us. "I better go now. My dad will send out a search party for me if I am even a second late! Be calling the army and demanding air support to find me." I finally say, chuckling lightly

"Is he overprotective?" he asks as he takes my hand and leads me to the door.

"Incredibly! I used to think my mom was unbearably protective of me but then my dad retired from active duty and moved to the training and admin side of the military, he became really overprotective. He was home a lot more, my mom was pregnant, having a hard time with it and then twins were born prematurely. He was protective over all 4 of us but more so me because I was becoming more independent." I say. Yeosang guides me to sit on the bench in the alcove at the door and helps me to put my shoes on, like he always does. "I started rebelling a bit around that age too, acting out."

"I can't imagine you being a rebellious teenager!" he chuckles "You look too innocent for that stuff!"

"Oh I was!" I laugh loudly "Don't underestimate my innocent face! Something happened at that age and I changed dramatically. I stayed out past my curfew, started hanging around with the wrong people, got into trouble, did things I shouldn't have been doing."

"Was it something bad?" he asks, looking into my eyes with concern

"At the time I thought it was, but after rebelling for a couple of months, I started to calm down and I realised it wasn't. It was a big thing but deep down, nothing really changed. However that is a story for another day." I smile lightly at him

"Your father loves you, and you are his first born daughter, it's only natural that he worries. I'll drive you to your parents apartment, make sure you get there safely." he offers

"It is only a 5 minute walk!" I say as he stands up holding out his hand for me to join him, his eyes looking into mine

"Then let me walk you there," he says softly, tenderly cupping my cheek. "I want to spend as much time with you before you have lunch with your family."

"Shouldn't you be accompanied by one of the managers?" I ask, scared about him getting into trouble because of me.

"I won't be gone long," he replies, grabbing a mask and hat from one of the cabinets beside the shoe rack. "Don't worry, angel."

He draws me into an embrace and kisses my forehead before his lips move slowly down to my cheek. He lingers there for a moment before they finally reach mine, holding onto my waist while we kiss. I'm entirely lost in this serene moment between us - all of life's woes seem so distant now.

Finally, he pulls away and gives me a twinkling smile. "Let's go," he murmurs, lightly brushing his lips against mine one last time before donning his mask and hat.

Yeosang and I step outside, the warm sun bathing our faces. He looks at me before taking my hand, and we stroll together down the sidewalk. It is a typical sunny August afternoon, not too hot, just a perfect temperature.

We walk in a happy silence as we cut through the park near our apartment. Suddenly, I tug him over to a plant and exclaim, "Look! A mugunghwa flower! Isn't it beautiful?"

"It is!" He nods with a muffled voice, veiled by his face covering. His eyes twinkle with joy and with his little eye creases I can see that he is smiling. He releases my hand to pluck one of the pink flowers from the branch. Then he carefully weaves its stem into my braid. "I'm sorry for taking a flower," he says, "but I thought it would look even more beautiful in your hair." His warm brown eyes glimmer in the sunlight. "Lets keep going before the search helicopter appears." he adds, I find myself laughing at his comment as he takes my hand again and we carry on walking.

We reach my parents apartment building I turn to face him. "I'll see you in the morning." he says his hands running up my arms

"Want me to make pancakes again? I'll put in an extra scoop of protein powder just for you." I smile

"I'd never turn down your amazing pancakes, even if they didn't have any protein powder in them!" he laughs. He pulls down his face mask enough to expose his lips before leaning in and kissing me tenderly.

"Yeo!!" I exclaim, "Someone could see us!"

"No one can see us from here." he smiles mischievously, replacing the mask over his mouth and nose.

"Still, that was a massive risk!" I say, "I don't want to get you into any trouble."

"You won't, so stop worrying about that!" We hear a car approach and stand back from one another. It was just as well we did as the car comes into view I see it is my uncles. Inside is my Aunt Soomin, Seojun and my other cousin Dongjae.

"That is my Uncle Jihoon." I say as he parks metres from us

"Oh." Yeosang says and I can see his eyes grow a bit wider as he looks over at the car and back at me. "I should go now that your family are here."

"Younhaaaa!" Seojun shouts jubilantly as he gets out of the car, his usual cheeky grin on his face.

"Jun, sshh!" I scold him as he reaches us

"Oh sorry, I didn't see you." he says to Yeosang who honestly looks like a deer caught in the headlights

"I was just making sure Luna got here safely." Yeosang replies, I can see how uneasy he is looking and I am fighting an internal battle not to reach out to him. Give him the reassurance he needs.

"That is very sweet of you." my Aunt Soomin smiles joining us

"Are you going to introduce us?" Jihoon asks me

"Sorry, this is Yeosang, Yeosang this is my Uncle Jihoon, Aunt Soomin, Seojun and Dongjae." I say quietly in case someone is nearby

"Wow, he's a lot shorter than I thought he'd be." Dongjae blurts out. "They look so tall on TV."

"Dongjae!" Soomin scolds, "I apologise for my youngest sons rudeness." she adds to Yeosang

"That boy doesn't have a filter!" Jihoon adds with a chuckle. "It is nice to meet you."

"That is ok. It was lovely to meet you all. I better go." He bows to them before quickly leaving and I watch as he disappears around the corner without a second glance and I feel bad for him being accosted by my family like this.

"He seems a lovely young man." Soomin comments as she hugs me "Are they all taking care of you?"

"They are." I nod

"Lets get upstairs before your dad sends out a search party for you." Jihoon laughs. Even he knows how my dad is and it makes me chuckle. He puts the code into the building entrance and holds the door open for us to enter.

When we reach the apartment door, I can already hear the twins inside making noise. My mom is trying to calm them down. I feel a burst of excitement at seeing them again, and especially my mom. Before we even knock on the door, it swings open and my mom throws her arms around me.

"Whoa Aunt Eunbi, how did you know we were here?" Seojun chuckles.

"I knew my baby was here." she says while squeezing me tight, "You've gotten taller!"

"Mom, I haven't grown in years!" I laugh.

"Maybe it's just that my big sister has gotten shorter since the last time she was here!" Jihoon jokes, tapping her head. "You do look like you have!"

"Oh stop it!" She lets go of me and embraces him. "Everyone looks short next to you!"

It's true: at 186cms, everyone else seems quite short - except for Seojun who is the same height, and Dongjae who is almost the same height with some more growing still to do.

"What's with this talk about short people?" my dad cheerfully inquires from behind us all. At 189cm, he's yet another tall person. Most people think that my father and Jihoon are brothers due to their respective heights - but it's really my mom who is related to him, being three years his senior. "Luna!" He adds as he enfolds me in a hug "I've missed you so much!"

"I've missed you too dad." I relax into his embrace.

After exchanging hugs with everyone, we move into the apartment and witness Soojin and Hyejin squabbling over an iPad on the floor.

"Girls, what have I told you about fighting like that over stuff when you each have one!" Mom lightly rebukes them.

"But mummy it's mine! Hyejin is trying to take it because her own is out of battery!" Soojin whines. Her British accent very prominent.

"Hyejin, this is your sister's device; if yours has run out of power then go charge it but don't take away your sister's without her permission," Dad steps in.

"You've always said to share though, Soojin isn't sharing!" she retorts, yanking it out of Soojin's hands. This causes Soojin to tug back at it and hit Hyejins hands to make her let go.

I stand by and laugh quietly at the scene unfolding before me. Hyejin starts screaming loudly at Soojin, even going so far as to grab at her long hair and pull on it. Quickly Dad snatches the iPad from their grasp.

"That's enough! Nobody gets the iPad now," he says firmly and they both groan in protest.

Dongjae quietly says in Korean, "Gosh, they're noisy!"

"You were the same when you were growing up with your brother!" Soomin chuckles to him

"Luna's here." my mom says

Instantly, their voices change from moaning to an excited shriek, as they finally notice me in the room and rush towards me. I kneel down to embrace them both as they throw themselves at me, toppling me onto my butt as I can only laugh and try to hold onto both of them. They have definitely gotten a lot bigger since I saw them last.

"Did you get my message this morning?" asks Soojin

"I did! And your photos too. They were really good!" I answer

"Who is ready for some food?" my dad asks cheerfully

"Me!" they both shout putting their hands up.

"I'm sure Luna is too!" Seojun says poking my stomach as I bat his hand away laughing. "Your sister is ALWAYS hungry!" he whispers dramatically to the twins

"Says the man who ordered 4 servings of pork belly at the karaoke a few weeks ago and ate it to himself!" I laugh. "Didn't even ask Dasom and I if we wanted any!"

"Oh what a gentleman I have raised!" Aunt Soomin says making us all laugh

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

When we arrive at the restaurant, we are taken to our reserved table. It doesn't take long before Soojin and Hyejin start bickering over who gets to sit beside me, so I suggest sitting in between them, which calms them down. Seconds after I sit down, my mom instructs the waitress that I have a serious seafood allergy, demanding that nothing on the table contain anything fish-based.

I almost say that it will be okay, as it was my decision to come here precisely because I knew it was safe. However I understand that my mother has always done this and will continue to do so regardless of what I say so I keep my mouth shut.

With each dish that arrives at the table, my mother repeats to the staff and it gets harder to stay quiet. I want to say something multiple times, but my father's understanding gaze kept me quiet. He knows how much I hate this but also knows, like we all do, that there is no point in trying to stop her.

"What are your plans for your trip?" Soomin inquires.

"We'll be here for two weeks before heading down to Jeju Island for a couple of days, then a week in Tokyo, and another week back here," Dad replies

"We will have a sleepover with Luna too!" Hyejin cheers

"I don't think so, honey," Mom says softly

"But we always have a sleepover when we visit!!" Soojin adds in disappointment, her eyes growing big

"'I'm sorry sweetie," I say sadly. Since I moved in with the other guys, it isn't feasible this time around. We'd usually wear our pyjamas and watch movies while eating snacks all night long. “I don’t live alone anymore.”

“But we will be quiet and behaviour ourselves.” Hyejin says on the other side of me. “We promise, don’t we Soojin? We won’t fight!” I see Soojin nod frantically

“Why don’t you have a sleepover at our apartment instead?” My dad suggests, “Mommy and I can have a night out and the three of you can do your little movie and snack night.”

“That’s not as fun!”Soojin pouts

"We will arrange something for a night just the 3 of us ok." I say putting an arm around her. Her little pout doesn't completely leave but it does seem to appease her a little.

The rest of the lunch goes by on a happier tone. Afterwards Jihoon, Soomin, Seojun and Dongjae go their separate ways while we go back to my parents apartment. My mom telling me she has some things for me. As we enter the apartment Soojin and Hyejin take me to their bedrooms to show me some of their toys. We spend the next 30 minutes playing and having fun until my mom comes in to get me. This causes both of them to whine before my mom says Hyejins iPad is charged. Instantly they both stop and run to get their respective devices.

"Dinner tomorrow night, what would Seonghwa like to eat?" she asks me as we go into the lounge. My dad is sitting on the sofa, his feet resting on the coffee table in front watching a football match on the TV. I notice there is a folded blanket underneath them, no doubt put there by mom so as not to scuff the table with his socks.

"Seonghwa will eat anything," I reply. "He's the least picky eater I've ever known. So whatever you feel like cooking will be fine."

"Do you think he'd be ok with a western meal? It's been so long since I attempted any Korean cuisine - I wouldn't want to do it now and end up messing it up! That would be mortifying!" She chuckles softly.

"I cook a lot of western style meals for the guys and they've never had any issues with them. Maybe make some ramen and rice as side dishes though. I have noticed they all, especially Seonghwa appreciate that!" I smile

"You cook for them?" My dad asks sounding surprised

"Well yeah." I shrug nonchalantly as I sit beside him. "They work long hours, can't really cook a proper meal by the time they get home. I am usually home hours before they are so it makes sense for me to do it. They never let me do the dishes though. Yunho and San usually tell me to go sit down."

I don't say a word that if I don't leave, Wooyoung will swoop in and carry me out of the kitchen. I secretly like when he does that, so I often stay put for that very purpose.

He beams widely, excitedly saying "I already like them! How is it going living with them?"

"I like it. It is nice being around people again and being able to look after people too."

"I am glad to hear that." he smiles. "I was a little worried at first when your mom told me you were living with them. I didn't like it."

"And Seonghwa?" I ask nervously

"Hmm, I wasn't too pleased about that at first!" he says lowering his eyebrows. I feel my stomach drop a little. "However, from what your mom said about him after she spoke to him that night and what I've seen in videos online, he does seem nice."

"He really is dad." I say smiling

"I'll still be giving him the dad experience but not the full one though." he laughs

"Just don't scare him away." I giggle "I really do like them... him!" Thankfully my mom comes back into the lounge with lots of bags and my dad doesn't pick up on my Freudian slip.

At the same time on the TV the opposite team has just scored a goal, much to his disappointment causing him to curse. My mom playfully rolls her eyes at him before coming over to us.

"I have your usual things from London - teabags, biscuits, your favourite chocolate bars!" she says excitedly.

"Ohhhh thank you mom" I say giving her a hug.

"And I got the guys some snacks too! I hope they'll enjoy them. I didn't know what they'd like so I got a bit of everything I could think of."

"She isn't even exaggerating! An entire suitcase purely for these snacks and your things! The excess fees at the airport was eye watering!" My dad chuckles at my mom's excitement before standing up and stretching. "I'll drive you home, it would take you 5 hours to get home with all these bags."

"You are probably right." I giggle. "Thanks dad!"

"I'll see you and Seonghwa tomorrow night." my mom smiles hugging me

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

When I get to the entrance, I put down my belongings and key in the code. The door chirps and I open it with my foot as I grab the bags again. After taking off my shoes and pushing them to the designated area, a wave of familiarity washes over me as I take in the familiar scent of the apartment. A small smile comes to my face as I start to feel like this is my home now too.

I walk into the hallway, my eyes immediately gaze upon a bag lying at the bottom of the stairs. I furrow my brow, trying to remember if it was there when I left for lunch with my family.

Suddenly, my gaze shifts as I see a movement out ofthe corner of my eye, and I catch sight of Yunho sitting on the sofa. My heart skips a beat as I rush over to him, my bags dropping onto the floor. The bags full of snacks and goodies forgotten about the second I lay eyes on him.

“Yunho!” I exclaim, practically leaping into his arms.

He rises from the seat, grinning broadly as he wraps me in a strong hug. His body radiates with heat as I cling to him tightly. He stands rock-steady despite my body slamming into his. He holds me securely as my arms wrap around his neck. Without hesitation I press my lips against his, unable to hold back. He kisses me back.

As he sets me down, I step back keeping a hold on his hands in mine as I take a good look at him. He’s wearing a simple t-shirt and jeans, but to me, he looks like a vision. Too scared to blink in case he disappears and is not really here with me right now. I can’t stop the grin from spreading across my face.

“What are you doing here?” I ask, still in shock.

“I live here,” he chuckles, his eyes crinkling at the corners.

I playfully roll my eyes and laugh. “I know that. I thought you were coming home tomorrow!”

“I was always coming home today,” he replies. “I wanted to surprise you though, so I told you it was Thursday.”

A bubble of joy rises in me as I chuckle. “You definitely did a great job of surprising me.”

“I really, really missed you,” he says, his eyes softening.

“I missed you too,” I reply, my heart swelling with emotion. I lean in for another hug, burying my face in his chest. I can feel the tears of joy prickling at the corners of my eyes.

My tears flow freely as I try to stifle a weep, but he sees through my weak facade. “Hey, don’t cry,” he whispers gently. I can’t hide my emotions, and he knows it. With his arms tightly wrapped around my waist, he pulls me closer, sitting back on the sofa and I sit in his lap, feeling safe and secure.

“I’m sorry,” I manage to say through my sniffles. “I didn’t realise I would miss you this much.”

To my surprise, he admits, “Honestly, I felt the same way. I spent most of my time moping around the house. Even my mom noticed my sadness and asked if I was missing someone back home.” He smiles, “Don’t tell Hongjoong, but I told her about you.” He adds in a mischievous tone.

I pull away slightly to look at his face. “You did?” I ask in disbelief.

“Not everything about the others, but I told her that I have someone back home who makes me smile every day, makes me incredibly happy, looks after me, and cooks for me.” He wipes the tears from my cheeks with his hand gently. "And who I care for deeply."

Feeling nervous, I ask, “And what did she say?”

“She’s happy that I have someone, especially someone who takes care of me and makes sure I eat properly! I know we’re not supposed to tell anyone about our relationship with you, but my mom was pretty persistent!” He grins at me, his hands resting on my thighs. “She asked to see a photo of you, so I showed her. I hope that’s okay with you."

A wave of relief washes over me, and I laugh. “Of course, I don’t mind! As long as it was a good one!”

“All the photos I have of you are good ones!” He chuckles and kisses my cheek. “It was from when we went out at 1 a.m. for snacks and ended up walking down to the river.”

As he takes out his phone and scrolls through it, I remember that night. We had so much fun, and he took a lot of pictures. When he shows me the photo, I can’t help but smile.

The photo on his phone glimmered in the low light of the room, casting warm hues across our faces. I actually really love that photo of us so I am glad he showed his mom that one as he has many unflattering photos of me already in his camera roll! His smile is soft, but genuine as he places the side of his head against mine, both of us staring at the image on his screen.

“She says you are absolutely beautiful!” he whispers, his lips tickling my ear. A warmth spreads across my cheeks, and I hide my face in the crook of his neck for a moment before looking up again.

“You can’t even see my face properly!” I giggle, my fingers playing with the back of his hair.

“I showed her some other photos too. She likes you though,” he says planting a kiss on my cheek “She says you have warm eyes, that you look kind and caring.” He pulls back to meet my gaze, worry sharpening it. “Please don’t tell Hongjoong though. He will be angry at me.”

“I won’t tell him,” I promise softly.

He stares into my eyes as his hand touches my cheek and moves down to my chin. He gently pulls my face closer to his and kisses me. I feel more tears begin to gather in my closed eyes. I pull my body closer to him, wrapping my arms around his shoulder to hold onto him tighter.

“It is all okay,” he whispers as we cling to each other, foreheads pressed together. “4 days apart was too many. I don’t want us apart for that length of time ever again.” His voice trembles with emotion, and I know he means it. We just hold one another, lost in the embrace of each other’s arms.

As much as I wish that we would never have to be apart, I knew that it was inevitable. We would have to be separated when they go home during their rare breaks from schedules, but I was grateful that we had moments like these to cherish. However, the thought of not seeing them anymore when it all ends was too much to bear, and tears threatened to spill over again.“Come to my bedroom, I have a present or two for you,” he whispers

“Yunho, you did not need to buy me anything!” I gasp, playfully hitting his shoulder

“I know but I wanted to!” he chuckles shifting my body with complete ease, hooking one arm under my knees and his other arm around my lower back and stands up. I can't help but giggle as he carries me down the hallway, up the stairs and into his bedroom.

On his bed, I notice a large and fluffy Kuromi plush. “I figured you'd love her, considering the sheer amount of Kuromi things you own!" He places my feet back onto the floor and supports me as I regain my balance.

“Is it that obvious?” I laugh as he hands it to me and I cuddle into her.

"Just a little bit." he chuckles

"I love her, thank you!" I exclaim with delight

“I also got you this.” he lifts a small purple velvet bag from his desk and passes it to me. I place the Kuromi plush his bed and open the pouch to find an amethyst crystal inside. I hold it up to look at it as it is beautifully radiating in the light streaming through Yunho’s window. “The lady in the shop told me this was the best crystal for stress and anxiety. I don’t know if you believe in the healing properties of crystals. You don’t need to keep it if you don’t believe in it; I won’t be upset.”

"Yunho, I absolutely love it!" I look up at him and embrace him tightly. "Yes, I'm a believer of crystals. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart!"

“It seems like something's been weighing on you," He murmurs as he holds me. "If you ever need somebody to talk to or just to be there in silence, I'm here for you.”

“Thank you, Yunho,” I whisper, feeling the warmth of his breath on my neck.

He pulls away slightly and looks into my eyes. “I mean it,” he says, his voice filled with sincerity. “You don’t have to endure anything alone.”

It is one of the most difficult things I have had to do, conceal my bipolar disorder from him and everyone else. Despite the effort I put into covering up all the evidence, Yunho has still noticed my inner battles. The resentment in myself that comes with having to take my medication in secret and wear long-sleeved shirts or lots of bracelets at all times to hide the scars.

Asking Hongjoong to keep my secret from them, it weighed heavily on me, and every day was starting to become an endless battle against my anxiety. Scared one of them would find out and know I had lied but also scared to tell them as well.

All at once, the defences that I’ve set up around me start to shatter. Tears begin to well in my eyes as I gaze at him, exposed and defenceless.

“Yunho…” I whisper, trying to keep my voice steady. “I just don't know how to tell you...”

“Shh..” he interrupts me quietly. “You don't have to explain anything right now. Whenever you're ready, I'll be here to hear you out.”

I nod, feeling a sense of relief wash over me. His lips capture mine once more and I feel myself begin to melt into him. His hands move around my back, pulling me close, as his other hand finds its way down my neckline tracing circles across my skin. I feel a familiar warmth radiating from his body, igniting all of my senses.

The kisses become more passionate, and our bodies begin to move together in sync, his hands explore further south toward my hips. The kiss intensifies as Yunho spins us around so that my back is against the wall and he is towering over me. He looks down at me with an intensity that I've never seen before; one that can only be described as pure longing and desire.

Yunho begins to move his lips down the side of my neck leaving tantalising trails everywhere he goes; finally finding their way to my collar bone where they pause for a moment before continuing their journey further south and making stops along the way while his large hands tenderly explore inside my cardigan.

His kisses stop at the neckline of my dress, he pulls his head back and stares down at me, chest heaving. His eyes dark with passion, but something is holding him back.

He speaks in a low, anxious tone. "Do you want to keep going? It's fine if you don't."

I look up at him, my heart pounding in my chest. "Yunho.." I speak his name softly. "I want this."

No more words are needed; we know what will happen next. Without waiting any longer, we jump into something completely new and unknown together.

37 notes · View notes

hwaberry-dreams · 6 months

Text

Looking for some feedback:

For Utopia I’ve been writing it from Lunas first person POV. Recently I’ve been working more on my writing, took a short creative writing course too to try improve. While I want the main POV from the story to be Luna, I do want to include Ateezs POV for certain situations that will be coming up.

So I am thinking of writing some parts from their POV but the majority of the story will be from Lunas. I won’t be jumping around a lot but I want to inject the guys input, thought and feeling to the storylines. It’s hard to convey their emotions when writing from only one persons POV.

So my question is, would this be something yous would like to see/read? Chances are if I do an Ateez POV, it will be in a 3rd person as it would be too hectic to bounce between 1st person for 8 people! lol

You can leave a reply on this, private message me or even do an anonymous ask.

I am in the process of writing chapter 16, I’ve already done the outline plan for this chapter and so far I am sticking to it as I write, so if I do 3rd person for the guys it will be starting from chapter 17.

Thanks for reading this and any replies I get. Please know that every heart, reblog and comment means the absolute world to me! 💓

#utopia #utopia ateez fic #ateez

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hwaberry-dreams · 7 months

Text

FIFTEEN: traditional first date

Warnings: swearing, brief suggestive (oral f receiving)

Word Count: 10.4k (sorry, it's a long one!)

I wake up with a start as a thudding noise comes from beside me. The top half of my body bolts upright and my eyes open wide as I look in the direction the noise came from. I see a rather scared looking Hongjoong right beside me, staring back at me, his eyes as wide as mine probably are right now.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up or give you a fright!” he says quietly

“It is ok Hongjoong.” I reply, running a hand through my hair as my other goes to my chest. I can feel my heart racing through my skin.

He leans down and picks up his laptop from the floor. I am assuming he must have dropped it and that made the noise that woke me up. I glance over at the clock on the wall and squint my eyes to see the time - 8.49am. I realise my 6am alarm did not wake me up and I look around for my phone, then remember that I had left it in my bedroom last night before I came upstairs. I hope it didn’t wake up the guys on the 2nd floor, especially San whose bedroom is above mine.

I look down beside me to see Seonghwa is fast asleep. He looks so peaceful. “I hope it is ok that I slept in here. Seonghwa insisted it was.” I say, looking back at Hongjoong. Although Wooyoung had already told me it was ok for me to sleep in the shared rooms, I was still a bit on edge. I didn’t want to make the other person feel uncomfortable in their private space. And both times I have slept in these rooms, the other person wasn’t there and therefore had no choice to sleep in the room with me in there.

“Of course it is Luna. I don’t mind at all.” He smiles softly, but I can see something in his eyes that said the opposite. His face looks awkward as he turns away from me and walks over to his bed.

“Wait, are you going to the studio?” I ask as I see him pick up the bag he always takes to work.

“Er.. yeah.” He replies, his hand rubbing the back of his neck.

“You are off work! It’s bad enough you went in last night after performing all day and then the fansigns and calls afterwards. I know you didn’t get home until at least 3am too!” I knew it was after 3am because I had woken up in the middle of the night to use the toilet and saw he wasn’t back yet.

“Actually, it was closer to 5am.” he says sheepishly, avoiding looking at me.

“Hongjoong!” I scold lightly, standing up from the bed. “You are going home today, so why are you going to the studio?”

“I am not leaving until 3pm, so I can easily fit in a couple of hours at the studio. I am working on the new Japanese song and I cannot get it to sound right. It is really bugging me and I won’t be able to relax if I don’t fix it. I know I can do it before I go home and it will mean I can fully relax on my time off because I know all my work is done,” he says. “I will be back here at 2pm!”

“You better relax, mister!!” I say. “If I find out you did any work when you go home, I will not be happy with you!” I add, as he laughs.

“What will you do?” He asks, stepping closer to me, his hands reaching for my waist.

“Hmmm, I’d definitely have to punish you.” I reply as he pulls me into his body, his hands staying fixed on either side of my body.

“Maybe I’d like to be punished.” He grins and I feel my tummy flip.

“I don’t think you’d like my idea of a punishment, though.” I say, placing my hands on his shoulders.

“and what would that entail?”

“Lots and lots and lots of English homework!” I raise an eyebrow at him as he bursts into laughter. “Maybe even make you speak only English for an entire day as well.”

“Oh, you have an evil streak in you!” He laughs, his hands snaking around my waist.

“I certainly do.” I grin as he pulls me into his body. “So don’t let my big innocent eyes fool you!”

“I better not get on your bad side then.” He says, the corner of his mouth curling into a smirk. The one he is well known for on stage. The one that, hopefully unknowingly to him, can turn me into putty in an instant. My eyes fall down to his lips as they move towards mine and just as they touch, a loud groan comes from behind us. Hongjoong pulls his head back and steps backwards, letting go of me as we turn to see Seonghwa rolling over in his bed and stretching. “I should go.” Hongjoong says softly.

I watch as he continues to collect his things as Seonghwa sits up in bed. My eyes return to Seonghwa as he looks up at me with one eye open and his hair sticking up in every direction, pushing his body back to lean slightly upright against the headboard and pillows. “Morning Luna.” he smiles lazily at me, his voice deep and crackly from sleep.

“Good morning.” I say to him as I sit back on the bed beside him, his head falling onto my shoulder, making me smile more.

“I will see you two later on.” Hongjoong says to us. “I promise I will be back at 2pm and will leave all my work in the studio too!” he directs at me as I go to open my mouth. He knows me well already, as I was literally about to say to him to make sure he comes home in time before he has to leave for home so he isn’t rushing. “Bye!” he adds, putting his bag over his shoulder

“See ya Hongjoong.” Seonghwa yawns, waving at him. “Were you telling him off for overworking before I woke up?” he asks me when the bedroom door closes

“Why do you think that?” I ask, turning my body to face him.

“He looked scared when he said he would be back at 2pm.” he laughs as do I

“Am I that scary?” I ask.

“Put it this way, I’ve never seen him look like that in all the years I’ve known him. Well, only when we were trainees and with management sometimes.”

“I don’t want to be scary!” I pout playfully, putting on my innocent eyes. Seonghwa suddenly grabs my hips and pulls me down into a lying position, eliciting a tiny yelp in surprise to escape me, then a laugh as his body hovers over mine.

“You don’t scare me.” He smirks, leaning down to kiss me.

“No!! I have morning breath!” I giggle covering my mouth before our lips could connect.

“So do I! I don’t care,” he says, removing my hand and placing his lips on mine. “Now, if you don’t mind, I am very hungry.”

“Want me to make you pancakes for breakfast?” I ask as he kisses my neck.

“Not the hunger I am talking about!” He smirks before moving lower

“Seonghwa!!” I gasp in shock as his hands pull my pj bottoms and underwear off on one swift yet smooth movement. His head disappears under the covers, as I can only laugh at his actions. My giggles soon stop, replaced by a small moan, as he doesn’t waste any time getting to work. “Oh god…” I moan again, my head falling back onto the pillow behind me. “Seonghwa!” and I hope to god that everyone else is still asleep!

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

After Seonghwa gave me 2 orgasms with his tongue alone, we finally got out of bed and I made him the pancakes I had offered earlier. Thankfully, everyone was still asleep, or at least still in their bedrooms, so I hoped that none of them heard me as I was struggling to keep quiet. Completely forgetting that Wooyoung and Yeosang were in the room beside us and Jongho was down the corridor. So yeah, hoping hard they were fast asleep!

After breakfast, I went for a shower in my room and started getting ready for my afternoon date with Yeosang. Every time I think of it, my stomach flips. I am very intrigued by where he was taking me, but I also was looking forward to spending some time alone with him. The other night on the sofa was the longest we’d spent, but also going to sleep with him cuddling me and waking up to him wrapped around my body was nice.

I look into my full-length mirror as I put my earrings in. Outside my room door, I can hear people talking and laughing. I hear a small knock at my door as I put the other earring in. I say to come in, looking at the door through my mirror to see who it is. I smile as I see Wooyoung head pop in.

He looks so cute with his hair in its naturally wavy state, with some of it pulled back into a small ponytail. I love it that way, but I’ll tell none of them how weak in the knees those ponytails make me when they wear them. Last week Hongjoong wore one for a performance and I swear I needed a cold shower at that moment. If Wooyoung knew how they made me feel, I know it would be a massive source of teasing from him and the man teases me enough daily!

At home, it is not unusual to see them with their long hair tied back, especially when they’ve been at the gym or just got home from practice! Seeing them with wavy and curly hair as well makes me feel less self conscious of my own naturally curly hair too.

“You look beautiful!” He says coming into the room and closing the door.

“You aren’t just saying that?” I ask, giving myself a final look in the mirror smoothing my skirt down before turning to face him.

“Absolutely not! Yeosang is a very lucky man.” He smiles, his head tilting slightly to the side. “I’ve never seen you wear a skirt either! I like it… a lot!” His smile turns into a cheeky grin as he wiggles his eyebrows playfully.

“He said it was casual, but cute and as you already know that to me, casual is hoodies, baggy jeans, oversized T-shirts, sweats. Basically tomboy to the max!” I laugh softly as he chuckles, sitting on the chair at my desk. Yunho had given me his spare gaming chair to use while Hongjoong looked for one I wanted. “So I hope this is ok,” I add, looking down at my outfit of a blue knitted vest top over a white T-shirt with a black skirt and black knee-high socks.

I place my hands on my hips and let out a small sigh, as I am really unsure. I hate how I am second guessing what I wear on dates with them. I’ve never done it before. I have always had the attitude that if my date does not like how I dress, then it is their problem. It isn’t anything the guys are doing either to make me feel this way. They always tell me how they like my style, that I look good in my clothes etc but I am putting pressure on myself to look good when I am out with them.

“Come here.” I hear Wooyoung say softly as he pulls me down to sit on his lap, his arms moving around my waist and placing a kiss on my shoulder. “Your outfit is perfect. You are perfect.”

“I am far from perfect!” I laugh lightly, one of my arms automatically wrapping around his shoulders while the other rests on top of his arms around my waist.

“You are pretty damn perfect to me!” he chuckles. “You are so small and cute, like a little doll! I just want to put you in my pocket and carry you around!”

“Small? We are nearly the same height!” I giggle

“Shush!” He pouts. “I am taller! You are my little doll!” I feel his arms tighten slightly as he playfully sways the chair from side to side. I lean forward to kiss his cheek, my lips connecting with the soft skin of his cheek and as I pull back, his head moves quickly forward to capture my lips. I kiss him back, my fingers holding onto the fabric of his hoodie around the back of his neck. The kiss deepens quickly and his breathing changes rapidly, just like the day before.

One of his hands moves from my waist down to my bare thigh and he squeezes the soft flesh before the same hand slips under my top. I feel his palm connect with my stomach and a little involuntary moan escapes my mouth. “Sorry.” He says, suddenly pulling away from me.

“Why?” I ask, feeling confused at the sudden gap between us as he covers his mouth with his hand. “Did I do something wrong?”

“No!” He says looking back at me, his eyes widen. The hand on his mouth moves to the back of his head and I can see he looks genuinely conflicted. “No Luna, you did nothing wrong. It was me! I shouldn’t have even kissed you.”

“What do you mean?” I ask as his hands move to my hips and lifts me off of him. I stumble slightly at suddenly being moved to my feet as he pushes himself off the seat. “Why shouldn’t you have kissed me?”

“I crossed a line and I am sorry,” he says, not looking at me. “I let myself get carried away and I shouldn’t have!”

“Wait!” I say loudly as he turns away from me and makes his way quickly to my bedroom door. However, I am quicker than him and make it to the door before he does. I stand in front of it to stop him from leaving. “What line?”

“Luna, I should go!” he says, his eyes looking anywhere but at me. “Today is Yeosangs day.”

“Wooyoung, look at me!” I say firmly, my eyebrows lower. His eyes reluctantly look into mine and I can see guilt in them. “What do you mean by ‘Yeosangs day’? and why are you saying you shouldn’t have kissed me?” I question.

“I shouldn’t have kissed you at all today because today is your day with Yeosang and his with you,” he replies

“And that means you can’t kiss me?” I ask as he nods his head slowly. I huff a little at this because I don’t understand it. “One rule between us all is no time sharing. Surely that means that just because I am going on a date with one of you doesn’t mean that I cannot be affectionate with someone else.”

“I just don’t want you to think that I am not being respectful to your relationship with the other guys,” he says softly

This causes me to pull him into my arms. I wrap my arms around his shoulders and hold him as close to me as I can get. “I would never.” I whisper into his ear as I rest my head on his shoulder and my hands stroke his hair. “Woo, I love your kisses and your cuddles. I love when you are affectionate with me and I don’t want you to hold back with me if you don’t want to.” I lift my head to look at him. “I respect your feelings about this though and while I completely love that you are respectful towards my relationship with the others, I am also in a relationship with you, too. You are my boyfriend as well!” His eyes look into mine and I can see how conflicted he is. “Wooyoung, are you ok with our situation? Me being with the others and you?” I find myself asking.

“No!” he replies quickly, his eyes going wide. “I mean yes, I am ok!” he adds even quicker. “I m-meant no, that I-I am ok with you being with the others a-and myself.”

I can’t help to let out a small laugh at how flustered he is. I have never ever seen this side of him and I admit it; I like it because it is very rare he gets this way, but I am also not wanting him to feel this way either.

“I am just hyper aware of your relationships with the other guys and I don’t want to step on anyone’s toes or cause any form of disrespect,” he says calmly

“Wooyoung, I don’t think you could ever be disrespectful to me or anyone. Please don’t think that way!” I say, one of my hands moving to his cheek. “If you really don’t want to kiss me or be affectionate on days I have dates with the others, then I will respect your wishes, but I never expect you to hold back.”

Although we had sat down at the beginning of this and had a talk about basic rules and things I don’t want, it was never official and, to be perfectly honest, we were all still in an awkward place. Now it has been a few weeks, things are settling down and we are all getting comfortable around one another. Admittedly, Jongho is still a bit on the shy and awkward side in one-on-one situations with me. However, he is slowly getting used to being alone with me and I am happy that he is, so I am not forcing anything.

Nevertheless, I think we need to have another conversation. A more in-depth conversation about how people are feeling, especially on date days, as I don’t want to have any of them feel uneasy. I make a mental note to speak to Hongjoong about this when he comes back from his parents to arrange this. Wooyoungs lips capturing mine interrupt my thoughts. I automatically kiss him back as he pushes me against the back of my bedroom door, my head hitting off the peg my night gown hangs on.

“I am so sorry!” he says

“It’s fine!” I laugh.

“I made you hit the back of your head, though!” His hand rubs the area I hit. “Are you okay?” he tries to look at it but I pull his hand away

“I am fine! I have a very tough head!” I reply, kissing the back of his hand. “It’s like steel, so don’t worry!” I put his hand back on my waist where it had been before. “Now where were we?” I grin. I lean upward to capture his lips once more.

After a few hesitant kisses from him, he relaxes and we pick up right where we left off before my head bumped into the peg. I feel his hands move down to my ass, giving it a squeeze before pulling my body closer to his. Before I know it, he has lifted me up. My legs instinctively wrap around him as he pushes my body against the door again. A small whimper comes from my throat and my body stiffens slightly at the sudden action, but I can feel how secure I am in his arms and pinned between his body and the door. I know he won’t let me fall, so my body relaxes once more and I continue to kiss him.

“You drive me insane, jagiya.” He groans as his lips move from mine to my jawline and down to my neck. “You do not know how much.” His teeth skim the skin of my neck before he pulls his head back to look at me. His hair is now a mess from my hands, his lips red and swollen with a hint of my lipstick on them and his face flushed pink. He leans forward and gives me the sweetest kiss I’ve ever experienced. A stark contrast to the kisses seconds before, but I am not complaining. “I really need to stop now.” He whispers to me, his eyes gazing deeply into mine.

He is right; he needs to stop. We both do before we go too far. I nod and kiss his lips lightly. I feel his arms surround my waist, and I hold on to his shoulder securely as I unwrap my legs from his hips. He holds me steady as I put my feet back on the ground. I go to move away, but he leans down and kisses me sweetly again. “I need to go pack.” he says

“Are you seriously not packed? You leave in like 20 minutes!” I laugh.

“Hey, I am not Mr Organised like a certain person who lives in this house, but I am a fast packer and I always have everything I need. Rarely do I have to buy things on the other end,” he replies, laughing too as he kisses my forehead.

His arms let go of me and takes one step backwards to give me space. I reach over to wipe the remnants of my lipstick off his lips with my thumb as he smiles at me. I can’t help but smile back because his smile is infectious. It also makes my tummy flip when he does it to me. We could be in a crowded room, but when he smiles at me, it feels like we are the only two people in that space.

“When you come back, can you and I spend some time together? Just the two of us?” I ask him as I fix his messy hair.

“You don’t even need to ask that! Of course we can. I want you all to myself again!” he says, leaning across to place a little kiss on my lips. I go over to the mirror to check my hair and makeup and I find it still intact. Other than needing a bit of a top-up of lipstick, my makeup is untouched despite the heated kisses. “Before I forget, the main reason I came in here was San was asking for you to go to his room so he could say goodbye before his dad arrives to pick him up and Seonghwa.”

“Wait, Sans dad is picking them up?!” My head snaps back to him as he nods, “Fuck! I thought it was a manager!” I feel a bubble in my tummy knowing that Sans dad absolutely cannot see me.

“No, Sans dad always comes to pick him up when we get time off. Seonghwas hometown is on the way, so he always takes him as well. He would drive each of us home if he could!” Wooyoung laughs

“That is… actually really sweet he does that.” I smile as he opens my bedroom door.

“He is. Sans dad is like all our dads now. He is so nice. He texts us all regularly to see how we are and calls us as well. It’s easy to see where San gets his kindness and compassion from.”

In the lounge Mingi, Jongho and Seonghwa are playing a game on the ps5. Seonghwas bags are at the doorway to the hall so I can see he is ready to leave. All three are shouting and laughing at the tv screen. Wooyoung and I walk behind the sofa and I can’t resist touching Seonghwas head as we walk past. He turns his head to see who touched him, then smiles widely as he sees it was me. Jongho laughs even louder, causing his head to quickly look back at the screen to see Mingi has scored a goal against Seonghwas team. I hear Wooyoung chuckle and hold on to my hand as we make our way upstairs. When we get to the second floor, he gives me another kiss. “Enjoy your date with Yeosang and seeing your family, too. Make sure you rest as well!”

“I will as long as you do too when you go home!” I reply.

“Not a chance with Kyungmin around!” he laughs. “I don’t mind it, though. It is never a dull moment with him. I imagine your sisters are the same?”

“Oh yeah! Double the trouble as well!” I laugh too. “Now go pack! I’ll see you on Friday.”

“See ya!” he smiles, patting my head before going up the stairs to his own room. I turn and make my way to Sans. His door is already open, so I knock and pop my head in. San is zipping his suitcase.

“Hey sunshine!” he smiles, tilting his head to motion me into his room.

“Wooyoung said you wanted to see me.” I say, walking fully into the room as he lifts his case from the bed and sits it upright on the floor.

“Yeah, I wanted to say goodbye in private. Didn’t want to do it in front of the others because I’ll end up getting teased for it,” he replies.

“You don’t need to explain.” I smile at him as he comes over to me. He holds me close to him, taking a deep breath as if he is inhaling as much of my scent as possible.

“I am going to miss you,” he sighs, burying his face in my neck. “A lot.”

“You’ll be back in a couple of days, so just enjoy the time with your family and being at home.” I reply, stroking the back of his head. “But I’ll miss you too.” I whisper into his ear, causing him to chuckle lightly and his arms to tighten ever so slightly.

“When I come back, we will continue The Sound of Magic, so don’t watch any of it while I am gone!” he laughs

“As if I would!” I laugh back. “It is our little thing.”

“I like the fact you and I have a thing that’s just ours.” he smiles at me. “I can be a little bit selfish sometimes with you.”

“What do you mean?” I ask.

“I don’t mind sharing you with the others or spending time with you and everyone else at the same time. However, there are times I just want to keep you to myself and I love when we do.”

“I love it as well.” I say, looking up at him as his hand moves to my face, gently cupping my cheek. He tilts my head as he kisses me. I smile as I kiss him back. It is a soft and sweet kiss. Slow and controlled.

“Sorry to interrupt you two,” Seonghwa voice says softly, “but your dad is in the garage. He’ll be here in a few minutes.”

“It is ok hyung. Thanks for letting us know.” San says, pulling back from me.

“I’ll see you on Thursday, Luna.” Seonghwa smiles at me. We had already said our goodbyes after breakfast, but it was nice to see him again before he actually leaves.

“Bye.” I smile back at him before he leaves the room

“I don’t like this, leaving you. It just doesn’t feel right.” he sighs, his eyes looking into mine and they look so sad. I’ve never him look this way and I don’t like it.

“Hey honey, don’t think that way!” I say, touching his face. “You aren’t leaving me, and I am not going to be alone. I have Yeosang, Mingi and Jongho. I’ll be seeing my friends too and my family. However, if you want to talk, then just text me! Anytime of the day or night. I don’t care, I’ll message you back as soon as I see it. And you know me, my phone is usually in my hand!” I giggle.

“That is true!” he laughs, and it’s nice to hear him perking up again. From downstairs, we hear a lot of voices causing us both to look towards the partially closed door. “I guess that means my dad is here.”

“Go, I’ll stay up here until you are gone, so he doesn’t see me.” I say.

“I am sorry,” he says. “I want to introduce you so much, but I know I’ll end up calling you my girlfriend and Hongjoong has told us parents aren’t to know about you yet. Even if I didn’t say that, my dad would just ask questions about you on the drive home and he’d figure it out!”

“You do not need to explain at all! I completely understand. My mom is the same!” I smile, kissing his lips to reassure him. “Now go!”

“One more kiss!” he playfully pouts, bending down to be eye level with me and capturing my lips. It catches me off guard and causes me to laugh, but I kiss him back. This one is more intense. Not in a heated, sexual way though, more in an extension of his emotions way. “I better go before he comes up to my room.” He says as I nod. “I’ve taken the password off my computer. If you want to play any games on it with your friends, then you can use it. No arguments either! I don’t want you going to the internet cafes alone, especially at night!”

He definitely knows me well as that is exactly what I was planning the following day!

“I wasn’t even going to argue with you! It is pointless even trying.” I laugh. “Thank you for trusting me with your computer, though. Now, go!” I say, gently pushing him away from me to get him to move.

“Ok, I’ll text you when I arrive in Namhae. Enjoy your date with Yeosang this afternoon too,” he says, picking up his backpack and pulling his suitcase towards the door. “Bye!” he blows me a kiss before he disappears out the room.

I keep the smile on my face until I hear him go down the stairs and sit on his bed, sighing. I didn’t like this either. It was only a couple of days! I didn’t know why I was feeling this way about them going home. I hear San shout “Appa!” as he gets to the lounge, and it makes the smile return to my face again because I can hear the genuine excitement in his voice at seeing his dad.

As soon as I hear the apartment door close and it go quiet, I leave Sans bedroom. I make my way down the corridor towards the stairs, being quiet just in case they come back in. I lean over the bannister, trying to hear for any signs of life downstairs when a voice from above makes me jump. “What are you doing?” I look up to see Jongho looking down at me over the bannister on the 3rd floor. A massive smile appearing on his face.

“You scared me!” I whisper.

“Sorry. Why are we whispering?” he whispers back.

“I want to make sure that Seonghwa, San and his dad have definitely left before I go downstairs.” I answer, looking down at the 1st floor again.

“Ah right.” He says as I hear his footsteps on the stairs. “You know you can still go down there.” he slides beside me, looking down as well.

“What if one of them forgot something and they come back and Sans dad sees me, though?” I mumble, biting my lower lip.

“We just say you are giving me an English lesson! You don’t have to skulk in the shadows like this,” he replies, making me look at him. “Come on!” he pushes off the bannister and grabs my hand. I am so shocked by the sudden action that I don’t resist as he pulls me down the stairs with him. “I am on dish duty today and Hongjoong is already coming home from the studio. If they aren’t done when he gets back, I’ll get scolded.” He keeps a hold of my hand as we walk down the corridor towards the kitchen.

“I can help you with them.” I offer.

“Oh, hell no! This is my job to do, plus you are going on your date soon. But you could always supervise me?” he grins at me. “Make sure I am doing it correctly.” His eyebrows wiggle playfully, causing me to laugh and nod as he navigates me into the kitchen. Still holding my hand, he takes me over to one of the bar stools at the kitchen island and makes me sit down. “You can boss me from here,” he says, letting go of my hand and pulling the sleeves of his shirt up.

There weren’t many dishes to be washed, just a couple of plates, some cutlery and 2 mugs, so it didn’t take him long as we chatted comfortably during it. Like we do when the others are around, except it was just the two of us. It felt like a very good step in the right direction for us.

“Are you seeing your parents tomorrow?” he asks, sitting beside me after he has put the last dry dish into the cupboard

“No, their flight arrives pretty late and they’ll be going straight to their apartment rental. It is a direct flight to Seoul from London so there are no change overs. The girls will be tired from the flight. It usually really tires them out and all 4 of them just crash out when they get to the apartment.” I answer

“It is a long flight from London.” he nods

“I’ll see them on Wednesday though, as we are going to have lunch with my uncle and his family.” I answer.

“Big family reunion! Sounds nice.” he smiles.

“It will be chaotic and noisy… but really nice.” I smile back.

“Do you normally speak English with your family?” he asks

“Mostly. My parents speak mostly Korean when they visit though, but the twins aren’t as fluent as my parents and I are. So we speak a mixture of both for them when they come.”

“They are still young,” he says, “And Korean is a hard language to learn if you weren’t born here. Even I still get things mixed up! I am sorry to ask you this, but are their names Soojin and Hyejin?” he asks hesitantly. “I don’t want you to think I don’t listen to you, but you only said their names once on the first night you arrived here.”

“Don’t apologise! That was a while ago I said that. Yes, Hyejin is the older twin, while Soojin is the younger one. They are fully identical too.” I answer, pulling out my phone to show him a photo of them. He moves closer to me and I can feel his body heat as our shoulders touch.

“Wow, they really are! They look like you as well!” he says, staring at the screen and smiling.

“People say that, but I can’t see it. I think they look more like my dad. Soojin is getting good at her Korean now. My dad says she is a mini me with her learning, while Hyejin is just a free spirit.” I laugh. “No one can tell her what to do. If she doesn’t want to do it, she won’t.”

“Is Hyejin the troublemaker twin?” he asks as he rests his elbow on the counter in front of us and subtly moves closer

“Oh no, they are both little troublemakers. Never underestimate their innocent faces! They are usually plotting something.” I say, “However, Hyejin is usually the one who thinks of the idea, while Soojin creates the perfect execution of said idea!” Jongho laughs loudly at this, causing me to laugh too. It is the first time I’ve made him laugh like this.

“They sound so funny!” he says, his eyes staring into mine in a way that makes my heart skip a beat. I feel one of his hands touch mine as his gaze briefly drops to my lips, then moves straight back to my eyes again, and he leans his head towards mine. I can feel his breath on my lips as they are just about to touch.

Suddenly the chime of the front door opening causes him to pull back quickly and stand up from his bar stool. He clears his throat and looks nervous as I sit upright. I feel like we have just been caught doing something we shouldn’t have. Hongjoong comes around the corner and smiles at us. “Ah Luna, you are still here. I was hoping to see you before I left.”

“I was just doing the dishes.” Jongho says rather loudly, causing both Hongjoong and I to look at him. His face is covered in guilt and I know he is feeling awkward over the little moment we just had. “I am going upstairs now,” he adds before leaving the room quickly without another word.

“Something wrong?” Hongjoong asks me as I stare at the doorway Jongho has just disappeared from.

“Not at all.” I shake my head, but inside I feel a little frustrated. This is the second time we’ve shared a moment that another member has unwittingly interrupted. “You wanted to see me?” I ask, looking back at him.

“Yeah, I just wanted to check if you’ll be okay while I am gone.” He says, “I know it is only for a couple of days and this is me fussing again which you hate, but I know I won’t relax if I don’t check first.”

“I’ll be fine!” I smile. “You don’t have to worry about me.”

“I know I don’t, but I can’t help it. I know it has only been a matter of weeks since you came into our lives, but I feel rather protective of you. I think we all feel that way.”

“I understand.” I nod. “I feel the same way about all of you. Which is why I am happy you are all finally getting to rest and see your families! So honestly, no need to worry about me at all!”

“Good! I should go double check my bags.” he smiles. “I’ll see you when I come back on Friday.” He leans down and kisses my cheek before leaving the room and run up the stairs to his bedroom.

I hear the doorbell chime, causing me to turn my head towards the doorway. Usually if someone comes to the apartment, they ring the video camera at the building entrance, but it didn’t go off. The only people who visit the apartment are the managers, and they usually just come in, so it is very unusual for the doorbell to go off. I hear someone jogging down the corridor and see Mingi go past the large doorway between the kitchen and the hallway. I hear the door opening and a soft chuckle coming from Mingi and some shuffling before the door closes.

“Luna, someone is at the door for you.” Mingi grins widely, coming into the kitchen.

No one knows I even live here! Who would be at the apartment to see me? I stand up from the bar stool, feeling really confused as Mingi just grins at me.

“Who is it?” I ask, feeling my chest tighten a bit. I can feel my nerves rising a bit at who it is.

“Just come here.” He tilts his head towards the direction of the front door.

Reluctantly, I move towards the doorway, but I stay close to Mingi as we go into the hallway. Instantly my chest loosens as I see Yeosang standing infront of the closed front door, holding a stunning bouquet full of pastel coloured flowers.

“I am here to pick you up for our date.” he smiles

“Smooth man!” I hear Mingi smile under his breath before he leaves us alone.

“What are you doing?” I break into a laugh and move towards him.

“I want it to be like a real date.” he says, kissing my cheek

He hands the bouquet to me and I smile even more, tilting my head to smell them. They are absolutely beautiful. “It is a real date!” I say, looking up at him.

“I mean, like if we were going on a first date in a traditional manner.” he replies

“What would a traditional first date with you be like?” I smell the flowers once more before I look back at him.

“I would pick you up from your home with flowers. I would drive us to our date, but today we have Myeonjin driving us.” he says, his hand delicately cupping my cheek. “Just because we live together doesn’t mean that I won’t be traditional and do things the way I would if we didn’t live together.”

I can feel my heart swell a little at this. It is so romantic.

“It is cheesy I know,” he mumbles, looking away, but I can see a red blush appear over his cheeks. I place the flower on the little bench at the door and put my hands on his face and gently move it back to look at me.

“It is not cheesy. Not in the slightest. I love it!” I whisper. “Does a traditional first date allow for a kiss right now?”

“Normally I would leave a kiss until the end of the date but we’ve already kissed… a lot!” he chuckles lightly, “So I say yes.”

I break into a grin as he leans down, but then stops just as our lips are about to connect.

“Just so you know Luna..” His lips ghost mine “…you may kiss me whenever you want...” My stomach flips as I feel his breath on my mouth and his brown eyes staring into mine. “…I don’t care if the other guys are there.” My heart literally skips a beat at his words and the way he is looking into my eyes. There is a hint of something in them, something nice, calming, and reassuring.

“Are you sure?” I ask him.

“I don’t want you to hold back and I don’t want to either anymore.” After what feels like an eternity, his lips brush against mine and I close my eyes, melting into the kiss. One hand on my waist as the hand on my cheek moves to the side of my neck. The affirmation of his words that I can openly show him affection now and no longer hold back makes my heart skip a beat.

“You look beautiful.” He smiles, resting his forehead on mine. “I love your outfit!”

“Is it casual yet cute worthy?” I ask.

“Very!” he chuckles, oh how his cute little laugh makes me smile. “And just so you know, you are always cute even in your pjs, glasses on, no makeup and your hair in a giant bun,” he whispers, “as you lounge on the sofa, wrapped up in your kuromi blanket, eating your little bowl of strawberries and watch your kdramas.”

“oh my god!” I laugh at the very idea of that image in my head even looking remotely cute.

“Are you ready to go?” he asks, pulling back from me, but keeping his hands on my waist.

“I just need to get my bag from my room and I am ready.” I reply.

“You go get your bag and I’ll put your flowers in the kitchen.” he smiles

I quickly make my way to my room, I grab my bag from the back of the door handle and check I have my usual essentials. Purse, brush, perfume, tinted lip balm, phone and epi-pen. I pull out the epi-pen to give it a once over. Something I have done for years. It is always good to make sure it is still in working order and not expired either, as a health care worker scared me with a story over someone’s failing when they needed it. Now whether that was true, I don’t know, but it definitely gave me the scare to always check them every week. I give myself a final look in the mirror, fixing the parting in my bangs, take a deep breath and say quietly, “You got this, no need to be nervous.” and leave my room.

Yeosang is already in the hallway again, waiting for me with a smile on his face. It is only now that I notice his own outfit. He dressed all in black and looks effortlessly stylish, like he always does. As usual, he helps me to put my shoes on. As we leave the apartment, I feel his hand slip into mine and holding it gently holds my hand as we make our way to the private garage underneath the building.

Myeonjin is already waiting by a black tinted SUVs. He goes to open the door as we approach, but Yeosang puts his hand up and gives a small shake of the head, opening the door himself and holding my hand as I get in. I smile as I do so before he closes the door and does a little jog around the other side to come in.

“So can I know where we are going now, or is it still a secret?” I ask as Myeonjin pulls out of the private garage.

“It is a little secluded cafe over in Gangnam.” Yeosang smiles

“And you said you’ve never been in?” I say.

“No, I’ve never had the time, but a couple of my friends have been and said it was good. I always knew it was somewhere I wanted to go with someone special,” he says, holding my hand. “And as much as I like our managers, I do not class them as someone special,” he whispers, glancing at Myeonjin in the drivers seat, who is bobbing his head to the song on the radio, completely unaware that Yeosang just called him someone not special. I can’t help but giggle at this and interlock our fingers. “Well, to me anyway,” he adds on laughing too.

“Well, I am very excited to see this cafe and even more to spend some time with you as well.” I reply.

“So am I.” he smiles, his free hand moving a part of my long bangs off my face.

As Myeonjin drives through the streets of Seoul, making his way over the Han River towards Gangnam, Yeosang and I talk between ourselves. The conversation flows so easily between us now, so much different from a couple of weeks ago when he could barely look me in the eye for longer than 30 seconds. Now he is holding eye contact, initiating physical contact, and it feels like he is fully relaxed.

“We will be there in 2 minutes.” Myeonjin says from the front seat, and Yeosang squeezes my hand before letting it go. He has held it the entire car ride from the apartment to Gangnam. He pulls out a hat from the pocket in front of his seat and puts it on. He passes me a black mask before putting one on, too.

“It is just procedure,” he says. “We can take them off when we get into the cafe.”

“Oh, I know.” I nod, taking the mask from him and putting it on as well. “It is broad daylight and you need to stay as anonymous as possible in a public place.”

“Sorry.” he says pulling my hand into his once more

“No apologising, I get it.” I smile. “I want to help protect you all too and to keep you safe, so I’ll do whatever I need to.”

“We all must have done something great in our past lives to deserve someone as amazing and understanding as you.” He replies, squeezing my hand. “We are very lucky.”

I am the lucky one, to be surrounded by these wonderful men who just want me to be happy. I am about to say this when the car slows down to a stop. Myeonjin gets out of the car first and speaks to a man dressed in black standing in a small alleyway. Out of context, it looks like some dodgy deal is happening, but I recognise the man as one of the security for the band. They are both nodding and Myeonjin looks over and gives Yeosang a hand signal.

“Stay here.” Yeosang smiles at me before letting go of my hand and getting out of the car. I wonder what’s going on, thinking the hand signal meant something was wrong until Yeosang goes to the other side and opens my door. He puts his hand out for me to hold and I feel myself smile again. “Lets go in.”

He really is being a gentleman on this date. It isn’t something I’ve ever experienced. My previous partners weren’t bad or horrible, it just wasn’t something they did. The way all 8 of them treat me, opening doors for me, checking that I’ve eaten, drank enough water, making sure nothing in my environment affects my allergies, even making sure there is always a supply of fresh strawberries in the apartment and at work for me.

Yeosang continues to hold my hand as we walk towards Myeonjin and the security guard, who, from what I can remember, is called Sohyun. “Everything is sorted inside,” the security guard says to Yeosang, walking ahead of us. The path is narrow and lined with lots of green foliage and mixed flowers. At the end of the stone path, I can see the cafe. It is very hidden and secluded and I wonder how Yeosang even discovered it when it is so hidden between the buildings and the nature.

“What does he mean ‘everything is sorted inside’?” I ask Yeosang quietly as we approach the door.

“We have the cafe to ourselves for a few hours. I wanted to make sure we could enjoy ourselves without fear of someone recognising me or taking photos. So Myeonjin hired out the cafe and Sohyun scoped out the place too, to make sure there aren’t any hidden cameras,” he replies, as my eyes go wide. “Don’t worry! This is all very normal when we go places like this.”

Sohyun opens the door for us as we walk in, and I see it is empty. Apart from 2 staff members are the counter who are busy working. “On dates, you mean?” I ask as Yeosang takes me over to a table by a large bay window that looks out into a small courtyard filled with plants and even some wildlife and pulls the seat out for me.

“Anywhere public that we just want to have privacy at,” he answers, sitting across from me. He takes his hat and face mask off as I do the same. “If the place is small enough, the company can sometimes hire the entire place, so it is only us or we can go into private areas in larger places.”

“That makes sense.” I nod, putting my bag on the empty seat beside me. “I can understand that. It is things that us normal people take for granted. Just being about to go out for a meal with friends without worrying.”

“But to answer your question - yes, dates too,” he says quietly. “Between our hectic trainee days, debuting, then our work schedules, we didn’t really have time for dates, though.”

“But you still got to go on dates, though?” I ask. “From what I understand, you guys didn’t have a dating ban.”

“We only had a ban during the trainee years, but we all found a way around it without the company, or Hongjoong finding out!” he laughs. I’ll bet! I can’t help but laugh as well at the thought of them going on sneaky dates behind Hongjoongs back while also reminding me when I used to sneak out the house to hang out with boys when I was a teenager. “I hope this is ok. I preordered an afternoon tea, but you can order anything you want from the menu!” he says.

“oh my gosh! I love afternoon teas!!” I gasp.

“Oh, that’s good!” he sighs lightly, smiling, and his face looks relieved. “I was so worried you would hate them and I had made a mistake.”

The 2 staff members bring over 3 tier trays filled with finger sandwiches, cakes, sweet treats, fruit. Everything you could imagine and it all looks so delicious! “Oh, wow!” I say once they have left. “Afternoon teas always remind me of my mom. She would take me to one or make one at home.” I smile as Yeosang pours some tea from a china teapot and moves the cup to me.

“Are you settling into the apartment okay?” he asks, opening a napkin

“I am. I won’t lie. It felt rather strange at first, especially after living alone for so long. I was, and still am, very aware that it is your home. The only place away from cameras that the 8 of you can be yourselves, and I didn’t want to impose on that place of privacy for you all.” I answer as he hands me a plate.

“It is your home as well now. A place that you can be yourself too,” he says.

“I know, and you’ve all made me feel so welcome. It is why I am feeling more at ease in the apartment now.” I say. “I enjoy living with you all. I didn’t realise how lonely I felt living alone before and how much I missed people! The dorms I lived in for uni were such a social place, a lot of fun times.”

“I found it hard living in dorms when I first moved to Seoul. It is hardly a secret that I am not the most social person. I was even more quiet when I was younger,” he says as I nod to let him know he has my full attention. “Too used to living with just my parents and sister to being a dorm in a new city with lots of people I didn’t know. I was on the verge of giving up and just going back home.”

“What made you stay?” I ask.

“Wooyoung!” he chuckles. “Things got easier when we became friends. I didn’t feel as lost or alone. He looked out for me and helped me get to know the other trainees. It was a hard decision to leave the company I was with to go to KQ and a massive risk too, but when Wooyoung followed me, risking his own career to be with me, it showed me what true friendship was.”

Hearing Yeosang speak to openly about life as a trainee, his friendship with Wooyoung and his move to KQ makes my heart warm. He is a very private person, I’ve known that before I even accepted the job and I know it isn’t easy for him to be so open with his feelings but here he is, telling me such ease as we spend the next 3 hours just enjoy the food and drinks, and talking easily to one another.

When it is time to leave, Yeosang asks me if there are any cakes I want to take home for later on. “We should get something for Mingi and Jongho too. I know Jongho doesn’t like sweet foods, but I am sure there is something he’d like.” I suggest as Yeosang nods. We go over to the counter and pick a selection of treats. I take out my purse to pay for them, but Yeosang waves his hand at me. “This was my idea to get a selection of treats, so let me pay for it!” I protest as he pulls his card out of his wallet.

“Absolutely not! This is still a part of the date, so I’ll pay!” he says, handing the card over.

“Fine!” I sigh, putting my purse back in my bag. “However, I will pay next time!”

Yeosang nods, but I can tell it is a ‘yeah ok then, just try it!’ nod rather than a ‘of course you can pay next time’ nod. Yeosang puts his hat back on and we put our face masks on, then head back to the car. It is raining lightly now, so we walk quickly since neither of us has coats on as Sohyun opens the car door. Yeosang lets me get in first and I shuffle along to the other seat to let him in. Myeonjin is already in the drivers seat and it isn’t long before we are pulling into the private garage.

As we walk into the apartment, it feels so quiet. Knowing over half the guys were now gone felt bizarre. I am thankful that Yeosang, Mingi and Jongho were staying. It would have felt weird being completely alone in the apartment.

“Thank you for the date.” I say to Yeosang. “I had a really good time with you.”

“I am glad. Thank you for accepting the date.” He smiles.

“So it’s the end of the date. How does traditional date Yeosang handle this part?” I grin at him.

“I would make sure you have arrived safely at your home.” He says, pulling me towards him. “If it felt right, I would ask for a second date.”

“And are you going to?” I ask.

“Do you want me to?” he teases, his hands move from my waist down to my butt, holding me closer to his body

“Yeosang!” I whine, pouting as he chuckles

“I’d take you on a thousand dates if I could!” he whispers, kissing me.

In an instant, he has me trapped between the wall and his body as his kisses deepen. Being in this position with him in the alcove at the front door to the apartment is becoming a very regular thing now.

I can feel him getting turned on as we kiss and I would be lying if I said I wasn’t feeling the same way. A small moan escapes him before he pulls his lips away, panting as he tries to regain his breathing.

“Are you ok?” I ask, moving a hand to his face as I feel his entire body shake lightly.

“Luna, I don’t want to make you think I don’t want to continue, because I do. I really do!” he sighs, lightly resting his forehead against mine. “I just… I’m… Sorry!”

“It is ok! Don’t apologise!” I kiss him lightly. “If you want to take things slowly, we will.”

“It isn’t about taking it slowly. I don’t want anything to happen that could ruin the night or make you regret anything. It has been such a perfect day with you and I am just worried.”

I feel a small pain in my chest at hearing him say he is worried and honestly, there is nothing I could do with him I would regret, but he needs to be 100% happy too.

“Then let’s have a relaxing night. No pressure, no expectations and definitely no worrying!” I say. “I don’t want you to feel that way, not with me. Ok?” he nods in reply.

His arms suddenly envelope around my body, tucking me into his. I smile as I rest my head on his collarbones. “Thank you,” he says, kissing the top of my head. We stay like this for who knows how long, both of us just enjoying the moment together, in one another’s arms.

“Oh, I didn’t know you two were back home.” Jonghos voice comes from the other end of the hall at the doorway of the utility room.

“We just got back a few minutes ago.” Yeosang says.

“Mingi and I were just about to have a movie night, if you two want to join us?” Jongho asks, “Unless you two already have plans!” he adds, his ears turning a shade of red and it is clear to see what he is meaning

“We don’t.” Yeosang smiles down at me. “Give us 10 minutes to get changed?”

“Perfect. I am making popcorn anyway and Mingi is down at the store getting some more snacks.” Jongho smiles before going into the kitchen. Yeosang gives me another kiss before we head to our bedrooms to get changed into our pjs.

20 minutes later, the 4 of us are on the sofa, the treats we got from the cafe and the snacks Mingi got laid out on the coffee table in front of us, giant bowls of freshly made popcorn, and trying to pick a movie. Yeosang shuffles behind me while Mingi is on our right scrolling the tv with Jongho stretches out on the other corner of the sofa.

“You guys pick whatever you want.” I say when Mingi asks me to pick.

“We can never decide, though.” Jongho laughs as I feel Yeosangs arms snake around my waist, pulling me to sit between his legs. “You need to be the deciding vote! What you say goes.”

“How about we do a blind pick? Close our eyes, Mingi scrolls on the remote, we count to 5 and whatever movie it stops on, we watch?” I suggest leaning into Yeosang, his chest pressed against my back and his legs on either side of my hips.

“Thats actually a good idea!” Mingi says as Jongho nods

As we all close our eyes, I feel Yeosang place a kiss on my cheek, causing me to smile and reach behind me to touch his face. “1, 2, 3, 4, 5!” Mingis voice shouts, causing us all to laugh and we open our eyes to see the highlighted movie is Frozen 2 prompting Mingi to sing Into the Unknown as Jongho covers his ears. I look back at Yeosang and to see him smiling down at me.

“Thank you,” he whispers into my ear

“For what?” I ask.

“Being you and accepting me… accepting us, and our insane lifestyle.” He replies.

I literally feel my heart skip a beat at his words as he leans forward to place a kiss on my lips and for the first time in a long time, I feel content and stable. Although only Hongjoong was aware of my bipolar so far, the others had accepted me and I knew I would need to tell them soon. As our lips part, I twist my body slightly to lie on my side, still secure in his arms so I can cuddle into him better. I look over at Mingi and Jongho as the movie begins, and I cannot help but smile. As much as I already miss the others, I feel so happy in this moment with the 3 of them, and incredibly lucky too.

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hwaberry-dreams · 8 months

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Erm…. guilty. 🤭

u think i am joking but this is genuinely how i look while writing: “god, you’re so fucking wet” and “such a good girl” for the hundreth time in my miserable existence

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hwaberry-dreams · 8 months

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hwaberry-dreams · 11 months

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I love his face when he laugh, it brightens up. 🥰

the way seonghwa laughs

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hwaberry-dreams · 11 months

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ateez reacts: chronic illness hospital visit

WARNINGS: mentions of being in the hospital & chronic illness/pain GENRE: fluff <3 WORD COUNT: 1.2k (whoops) this is @hwaightme's fault (also my own for going to the ER but it's more fun to blame bai <3)

hongjoong listens intently to every word the doctor says. he's the reason you're there; the panic on his face when you doubled over in pain this morning was enough to convince you. he needs to know what's going on. he trusts you when you say you're fine, but he'll feel better hearing it from the professionals. he doesn't dote on or coddle you like some of the other members; he just keeps you company and makes sure you're well taken care of. he very rarely leaves your side, keeping your pinkies linked together when he can, a comfortable quiet between you most of the time, idle chatter the rest. when you finally make it home, he practically collapses into your arms, giving you the warmest hug he can since he can't give you the tightest. the next time you have a flare-up, there's a lot less panic in his eyes when he asks what he can do to help

seonghwa, like joong, listens carefully to every word the doctor says, even jumping in and asking questions from time to time; especially when it comes to your care. he's making sure he knows what you can and can't do/have both while you're in the hospital and once you're out, and will not let you forget any of it. he's quiet while you're there, clearly pensive, and very rarely leaves your side. sometimes there's idle chatter between you, but mostly you're just comfortable knowing the other is there. the next time you have a flare-up, you can bet he's pulling up a note on his phone, running through a checklist of the things the doctors and nurses said would make things both better and worse. if it's in the 'worse' column, you're not doing/having that for at least a week if he can help it, and if it's in the 'better' column, he will make sure you have/do that thing asap

yunho is probably the most level-headed about the whole thing. he understands, he trusts you and the doctors, and while he hates seeing you all hooked up in the bed, he understands why you made the decision to come. if it ends with you feeling better, he's all for it. he spends most of your alone time trying to make you smile, and he's always touching you. you two are watching whatever shitty movie is on the tv and he's holding your hand; the doctor has to come in to run some tests and he shifts to put a hand on your calf or your foot, smiling at you from the foot of your bed; if you lay down for sleep or a nap, he's got his fingers carding through your hair. he was probably paying less attention than joong or hwa would, instead relying on you to tell him what you need when you inevitably have another flare-up

yeosang is another that took you to the er himself. seeing you in pain like that, no matter how many times you said you were fine, made his stomach turn. you figured you may as well put his worries to rest; insurance would cover it anyway. he's another close listener; although, unlike joong or hwa, he spends most fo your conversations with the nurses and doctors glancing hurriedly between the two of you. he's very carefully caring when the nurses are out of the room; making sure you have water, that you're not too cold, even fluffing your pillow once or twice; and he's definitely the type to stick his head out into the hallway if your call light has been on for more than five minutes. he dotes on you even more when you get home, and good luck lifting a finger to do anything during your next flare-up

san is the most visibly worried when he sees you in pain. his voice drops about an octave and his lips get pouty, brows creasing in worry; and you're too weak for that man to say no when he asks you to go to the er "just to make sure." much like joong, he listens carefully to everything the doctor says, nodding along dutifully. unlike joong, he spends most of these discussions with his eyes on you, looking for your reactions. his hand is always in yours, so when your brows furrow in annoyance or you give a small, triumphant smile, he gives it a squeeze. the second you're out, he's peppering your face in kisses and pampering you for the rest of the day, and you can expect the same treatment next time

mingi has one mission only; make sure you're still happy. he spends your alone time trying to make you laugh, making fun of whatever is playing on tv or showing you stupid memes. eventually you have to smack his arm (affectionately) and tell him to leave you alone, you're supposed to be resting, and laughing that much hurts a little! he'll settle down in the chair with his phone, but you catch him sending glances your way about every five minutes. don't ask me why, but he probably falls asleep while waiting on the doctor long before you do. he does wake up immediately the second someone else is in the room; he's a quiet listener like joong. when you get home, good luck leaving his arms, and the same goes for your next flare up

wooyoung means only the best, but honestly, he's a little bit of a menace to both you and the hospital staff. he pestered you incessantly to get you here, worry obvious, and now that you are, he's restless enough for the both of you. like mingi, he tries his best to make you laugh, causing a nurse to poke her head into your room and shush you both. he's glued to your bedside; except for runs to the vending machines, which he tries to sneak you your favorite candy from, much to your nurse's amusement; and god help joong if he tries to come remove the little devil. that man is a MESS if he doesn't know immediately what's going on while you're in the er. he becomes an immovable cuddle bug the second you get home, and the next time you have a flare-up, you have to shove your discharge instructions in his face for him to calm down. "it's right here, wooyoung. i'm not going back there for them to tell me the same shit." he still hovers for the rest of the day, though

jongho only betrays his anxiety in the fidgeting of his fingers. he's much like hwa, sitting dutifully by your side and nodding along, asking questions where he feels like he needs clarification. if this is something you're living with, he needs to know how to live with it, too. he's mostly there to keep you company and make sure you're well taken care of. he isn't as touchy as some of the other members, preferring to keep his anxious hands to himself and talk with you instead. he only really brings his phone out if you do yours first, or when the doctor or nurse is speaking so he can take notes. he, like joong and hwa, is well-prepared for your next flare-up and, much to your delight, you can leave all the hard work to him

a/n: i am fine i have to follow up with my doctor but my brain went wild while i sat there for four hours!!! enjoy my loves <3 ateez taglist: open! nothing yet...

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hwaberry-dreams · 1 year

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FOURTEEN: insomnia

Warnings: oral (f receiving), fingering, protected sex, slight soft dom, feelings of being overwhelmed during sex.

Word count: 9.8K

Taglist: @kiwibaekie @fudgeflyssworld @kodzukein @elk-1998 @khjcoo @pepperony-7 @ateez-babygirl @starillusion13

I lay in bed, staring at the window. I can hear the occasional car passing down below. A week has passed since the meeting and work was busy. I was also struggling to sleep. The guys have their final promotion schedule the following day and then thankfully have a few days off before rehearsals for the tour and upcoming kcons begin. Despite seeing each other every day at home and at work, we had all been busy that we had barely spent any quality time together. Seonghwa, Yunho, Hongjoong, San and Wooyoung were going to see their families for a couple of days while Yeosang, Mingi and Jongho were staying in Seoul. My parents and sisters were also arriving in a couple of days, too, and I was looking forward to seeing them.

I sigh and give in. I accept that sleep is not coming anytime soon so I throw my cover off me and get out of bed. I open my bedroom door and make my way to the kitchen. The entire apartment is quiet. Everyone is asleep. Oh, how I envy them. I bitterly envy everyone who is in the land of nod right now while I am wide awake but absolutely exhausted at the same time!

I get some milk from the fridge and pour it into a saucepan. I am hoping some warm milk might help me get sleepy. As I wait for it to heat, I check my phone. There is a message from Soojin. I smile as I open it. It is a simple ‘I love you’, but it melts my heart. I quickly reply that I love her too and that I can’t wait to see her.

I settle onto the sofa with my mug of warm milk and switch the tv on, turning the volume down. I pull the throw over the back of the sofa over myself. I scroll aimlessly through Netflix trying to find something that would lull me to sleep. I don’t even know what I’ve put on, as I am more focused on scrolling through my phone.

“Can’t sleep?” I hear Yeosangs deep voice ask softly from the doorway, giving me a fright as I hadn’t heard him come down the stairs.

“Nope.” I answer, sitting upright and switching the tv off with the remote. “I didn’t wake you up, did I?”

“of course not. I didn’t know you were even awake until I got into the hallway and saw the light on.” He says, coming into the lounge. He is wearing a black tank top and loose red and black plaid pj bottoms.

“You can’t sleep either?” I ask as he shakes his head and runs a hand through his dark hair. I can see how tired he is in his face. Yeosang is naturally pale, but I can’t help notice how much paler he looks than normal. It worries me, as I know how hard they are all working right now, both physically and mentally. “Want to cuddle?”

I open the side of my blanket and pat the space beside me. He smiles and comes over. I can feel how tense his body is as he lays down beside me. He tucks me into his side, my head resting on his chest as his arms wrap around me. Usually our cuddles are fleeting as there is always someone around and normally in the kitchen or hallway. It feels nice to be actually lying down to hug him, no fear of interruptions or someone walking in. I feel him place a kiss on the crown of my head, causing me to look up at him.

“I’ve missed you.” he sighs

“Me too.” I reply. “About you, I mean. Obviously, I don’t miss myself!” This causes him to chuckle and I can feel his deep laugh vibrate in his chest. I cautiously rest my leg on top of his and immediately he pulls me closer, his right hand holds onto my left. His other hand resting on my lower back, his fingers making soft circles through my shirt. I feel the tension in his body lessen.

“Anything in particular keeping you awake?” He asks as his fingers play with mine.

“Just a little bout of insomnia.” I answer, resting my head back on his chest and looking down at our hands as my fingers playback with his. “What about you?”

“Wooyoung is talking in his sleep.” He answers.

“Woo is a sleep talker?” I laugh. The fact he talks in his sleep when the man talks a lot when he is awake is funny to me.

“He does sometimes.” He laughs. “I can still go to sleep and sleep through it when he does it, but not tonight, for some reason.”

“Can you make out what he says when he does it, or is it like mumbling?” I ask trying to picture Wooyoung talking in his sleep. The night I had slept in his bed I had heard nothing, but then I can sleep through anything so he could have been having a full-blown concert in his sleep and I wouldn’t have known!

“Oh yeah, he speaks very coherently!” he replies. “Tonight it is something about pandas and pineapples chasing him to steal a wooden spoon.” He answers, his fingers pretending to catch mine now.

“Sounds like an interesting dream.” I giggle.

“Yeah.” He chuckles as he continues to play with my hand, it turning into a gentle game of thumb wrestling, making us both laugh quietly. It feels comfortable laying with him like this, like we do it all the time. The reality is we have only had a couple of kisses and hugs when we have had moments alone, which have never lasted long, as there is always someone around. So this feels nice. Yeosang is completely at ease right now because everyone is asleep. We know there will be no interruptions and it’s nice to see this touchy and playful side to him I’ve never got to see before. After a few minutes, he asks softly, “Do you get insomnia often?”

“I used to struggle from time to time when I was a teenager, but the last time I had it was over a year ago.” I say.

“How long has this one been going on for?” he asks.

“I am on day 3 so far.” I answer.

“You haven’t slept in 3 days?!” he asks. “Sorry, I am asking you a lot of questions.”

“I don’t mind answering your questions. I got around 2 hours last night, but it was broken up.” I reply, yawning. I can feel myself beginning to relax into Yeosang.

“Does this help? Cuddling into someone?” he asks. I nod and smile gently at his questions, but also at what he is asking. “Anytime you can’t sleep, you know you can come to one of us.”

“Can I come to you for cuddles in the middle of the night?” I ask, my fingers intertwine with his now.

“If-if you feel it would help you, then of course you can.” he says quietly. I can hear his heart beating a little faster now.

“This is helping me.” I say sleepily.

“I am always here for you.” His voice is soft as I let out another yawn. “Close your eyes and get some sleep.” He whispers and I feel his hand that was on my back move up to my head, stroking it gently.

“What about you?” I ask, moving my head slightly to look up at him. “You need to sleep too.”

“I’ll be going to sleep soon.” He replies, kissing my forehead. “This is helping me too.”

“That’s good.” I move further up his body, pressing my lips on his. He kisses me back softly and smiles at me when our lips part, before I place a kiss on his bare shoulder. I cuddle into him once again, my knee bending over his legs to get even closer to him.

“Sweet dreams.” I hear him whisper as he delicately caresses my back.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

As I feel myself begin to wake I can feel a warmth behind me. There is a distant clattering noise coming from the kitchen and someone making a shushing noise. I open my eyes and can make out through my blurred vision that I am on the sofa. I am lying on my left side, facing the backing of it and there is a heavy weight over my right hip and a hand on my stomach. I look behind me and squint my eyes to see Yeosang asleep. His left arm is under my head while his right is over my waist. His leg is draped over my hips as he is flush against my back. The top half of the blanket has fell off and lying on the floor while the bottom half is covering our feet.

The early morning light is coming in from the large window behind the sofa. My alarm hasn’t gone off so I know it isn’t 6am yet. Another noise comes from the kitchen and I hear a deep yet hushed voice say “Could you make anymore noise?!” I recognise it as Seonghwa, the reply of “Sorry!” belongs to Mingi and a “You’ll wake up Luna and Yeosang making such a racket!” from Seonghwa.

I put my head back down onto Yeosangs outstretched arm I had been sleeping on before I woke up and close my eyes. I feel Yeosang move slightly behind me, his arm over my stomach pulling me into him. I move my hand to his and hold on to his fingers as I doze in and out of sleep, but I can hear Seonghwa and Mingi quietly walking around. I hear one of them come in to the lounge and pull the fallen blanket over us both before a kiss is placed on my temple. I can tell from the scent as they leaned over me it was Seonghwa, and then hear them leave the apartment. I knew they both had an early schedule, and the others were joining them at the music show later on.

I begin to feel Yeosang waking up behind me. The hand that has been on my stomach moves to my hip as he partially sits up and leans over me. I turn my head and open my eyes to look at him. “Good morning.” I smile at him, rolling onto my back.

“Did you sleep well?” he asks, his morning voice much deeper than normal as I nod.

“I did. Did you get to sleep soon after?” I ask him.

“I fell asleep straight after you did.” he replies.

“I am glad.” I reply, gently pulling his head down so I can kiss him.

It starts slowly, our lips softly moving against one another. Just at our usual easy pace. That is, until his top half lowers onto me and my hands move to his long hair. Before I know it, his entire body is on top of mine and our kisses are turning needy. I feel him getting hard as his hips subtly move against me.

“We should stop.” He mumbles against my mouth, panting heavily.

“Ye-yeah.” I reply as he moves off me but keeps his hand on my waist. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. I don’t want to stop but…. I know if we keep kissing like this I will want to do more and I don’t want to rush you.” he says

I can’t help but smile at this and it also makes me want to kiss him again at how sweet he is being, but I am respecting what he is saying. “You wouldn’t be rushing me, but I understand where you are coming from.” I reach for his hand and play with it like we did in the early hours of this morning when we both couldn’t sleep. “I don’t want to rush you either.”

“Since we have some alone time, which is rare in this house, I want to use this time to ask you if I can take you on a date tomorrow afternoon?” he smiles at me.

I feel like a million butterflies have been let loose inside my stomach as I look at him. “You want to take me on a date?” I ask, knowing I am smiling like a lunatic right now.

“I do.” He nods, chuckling, and I can see through my slightly blurry vision that his cheeks and ears have turned red as he looks away. “If you want to, that is.”

“Yeo, of course I do!” I cuddle into him, and he lets out what sounds like a sigh of relief. “Where are we going?”

“Ah, I want to keep it a secret. However, I remember the debacle you had over what to wear when you went on a date with Seonghwa….” He says.

“Hey! There was no debacle!” I laugh, playfully tapping his stomach with the palm of my hand

“Oh, you were 100% flapping. We all saw it!” He laughs back.

“Ok, so I might have flapped a little, I guess!” I reply as it was true, I did!

“So to stop any flapping over this i will tell you it involves food and is somewhere really casual but cute. Well, I think it is cute. I haven’t actually gone to it. I’ve only seen photos of it and walked past it too, but it is somewhere I’ve always wanted to take someone special, so this is perfect.”

“I am someone special?” I ask him.

“You are very special. To all of us.” he says, tilting my head to kiss me.

“I thought you didn’t want to kiss me anymore.” I playfully tease him, poking his shoulder

“Oh, I want to kiss you and so much more!” He laughs deeply. “But I don’t want our first time together to be a quickie before the others wake up. I intend to take my time with you when the time comes.” He grins, kissing me once more. I feel my tummy flip at the thought of it and I can’t help but squeeze my thighs together as heat pools in my core.

I know he is teasing me now as the hand that was on my waist moves lower and squeezes my ass over my pyjama bottoms. His teeth lightly nip at my lower lip. He pulls my left leg over his hip before moving his hand back to my ass. I can feel us getting carried away again as he suddenly pulls my hips into his and I can feel the outline of his hard on through our pyjama bottoms. He moans lightly against my mouth before my alarm suddenly blares from my phone, causing us both to jump in fright. Yeosang quickly turns over and picks it up from the floor and hands it to me as we both laugh.

“Your loud ass alarm always makes me laugh.” he says as we sit upright.

“Sorry!” I giggle, nudging his shoulder with my head

“Do you want to come down to the gym with me?” he asks, moving my long bangs off my face and cupping my cheek

“I think that would be dangerous.” I playfully grin at him.

“Worried you wouldn’t be able to keep your hands off me?” he smirks back, his hand moves down to my neck. “I saw you watching me in the mirror last time we went to the gym.” It spins my head how he can go from being so shy to so cocky.

“Can you blame me? Look at you!” I laugh, feeling my face blush. “I think I’ll stick with my usual run around the park this morning. It is less distracting.”

“Probably safer too.” He nods as he leans forward as if to kiss me, but just before his lips touch mine, he pulls back and stands up with a smirk on that innocent face of his. He is teasing me once again, but I cannot lie and say that I am not liking this new side to him I am seeing. He holds out his hand for me to take and he helps me up. “I shall see you later on.” He simply says before leaving the room. I run my fingers through my hair and shake my head as I laugh lightly to myself. I did not expect this amount of teasing from him, but I am not complaining either.

─── ･ ☆: *.☽.* :☆ ･ ───

The final performance is at Inkigayo. There is a series of fancalls scheduled for after the stage performance, so I was there to help with any translations, but overall the guys handle each call really well. In previous fancalls I have barely been needed by any of them. As soon as we arrived at the studio, they went straight into hair and makeup and then to wardrobe, so I was waiting alone in the room where everyone had left their things.

“Hey Luna!!” Hyunshik says as he comes into the room.

“Hiya!” I smile, putting my phone down

Since the meeting a few days ago, we had been talking more. Hyunshik was one of the junior assistant managers. He joined the company a year before I did and had been training ever since. He was a really funny guy and easy to talk to as well. I could see how much he loved his job and wanted to be promoted to full manager status and not assistant manager, which was basically doing whatever the managers told him to do from what I could see.

“What a manic week it has been!” he sighs, sitting across from me. “I cannot wait for a few days to do absolutely nothing!”

“Are the promotions always like this?” I ask him

“Generally yeah. This one has felt so much busier, though. With all the music shows, interviews, the group and individual schedules, online fan calls, in person fan signs. I think because this is the first comeback with full audiences, it has felt more hectic than other comebacks.” He replies, opening his laptop. “And things are only going to get busier too, with the kcons and tour dates coming up! I honestly don’t know where the guys get their energy from. I go home exhausted every single day and I am not on stage performing multiple times a day every day.”

I can only nod silently. I don’t know where they get it from either. I am seeing them come home every night on the brink of exhaustion, but still practicing in their bedrooms. Hongjoong normally going from the apartment to his studio until the early hours doing even more work. Honestly, it has worried me, but Yunho had told me to trust them to know their own limits when I voiced my concerns about their wellbeing the previous week. So I was trying not to worry, but that was easier said than done. So I have been doing a lot of tongue biting recently.

“Do you have any plans for your time off?” he asks, pulling me from my thoughts

“My parents and sisters are coming to Korea for a couple of weeks on Tuesday, so I’ll spend some time with them.” I answer.

“Do they not live in Korea?” he asks

“They live in London. I moved here in 2017 for college, but I was born in New York.” I answer. It is always an automatic answer that comes out of my mouth whenever I am asked where my family lives.

“Wow!” he gasps, looking up at me. I never tire of that reaction either. It is always been entertaining to me. The next question is always “Are both your parents Korean?”

“They are. Both were born in America too, but all 4 of my grandparents were born here and moved to America.”

“I didn’t think you could get any cooler Luna, but you surprise me! It explains your American accent when you speak English.” he smiles. Everyone says that too about my accent when I tell them. “So, what are your plans with your family?”

I go to answer, but the door opens, causing us both to look over. Seonghwa, Wooyoung and Jongho come in. They are ready for the stage and I have to stop myself from gasping at how hot they look for their final promotions stage outfits. Seonghwa is wearing a sleeveless top and honestly, seeing his bare arms is a weakness for me. I hope to god he never finds out about it! Wooyoung is wearing a white shirt that is unbuttoned dangerously low, a slim black tie around his neck with a black baseball style jacket and ripped jeans. Jongho is in all black. Black jeans, black shirt, black jacket with a white rose pinned near the pocket. Honestly, he looks amazing and I know I am staring. I am dreading seeing what the others are wearing as I may start drooling! I’ve never felt this way over boyfriends in the past. Wooyoung smiles as he sees me and goes to come over, but stops when he sees Hyunshik.

“Oh, hey Hyun!” he says to him

“You guys nearly ready for the stage?” he asks, looking back at his laptop

“Most of us are. San is still getting his hair done, and the stylist is making a small change to Yunhos shirt.” Seonghwa answers.

“Myeonjin said the stage is almost ready, too.” He replies. “Ah shit, I’ve left the paperwork for the fan calls in the office. Ilsung will kill me if he finds out I don’t have them! I’ll be back in an hour! Don’t tell him!” He adds, grabbing his mobile and bag.

“Your secret is safe with us!” Wooyoung laughs

“We can finish our conversation later on too, Luna!” He smiles at me before running towards the door.

“We sure will!” I laugh as I watch him run out of the room and then feel Seonghwa kiss my cheek from behind. I tilt my head up to look at him from my seated position as he puts his hands on my shoulders. I place my hands over his as he bends down and kisses me on the lips. “Hi.” I whisper to him in English.

“Conversation?” I hear Wooyoung say.

I look over at him to see him actually pouting. “Are you jealous?” I ask

“No!!” He replies immediately and rather loudly, causing Seonghwa to laugh. “I was just wondering what kind of conversation you guys had that needs to be continued at a later time is all!” But I can see he is a little jealous. Wooyoung does not have a good poker face.

“You are jealous!” Jongho teases him as I stand up, moving towards Wooyoung, and he huffs slightly as I cuddle him, taking care not to ruin his hair or makeup.

“Give me a proper hug!” He whines, pulling me closer.

“We were talking about our plans during the break.” I say to him softly, my hands stroking his lower back as I relax into his body. “That is all. Nothing to be jealous of.”

“I am not jealous.” He says quietly to me.

“I know.” I whisper back. “But just so you know, if you were…” I look up at him “…it would be really really hot!” I raise my eyebrows as he breaks into a cheeky grin.

“Noted.” He replies before kissing me.

“Your make up!!” I giggle, pulling my head back

“I don’t care!” He says, leaning down to capture my lips once more. I am now used to how open around the others he is with his affection and kisses. I kiss him back as I feel his hands move down my sides and rest on my ass. I can also feel his breathing change, becoming a little faster, his hands pulling my body even closer to his than it already was. This kiss feels so much more different from our usual kisses. It is getting heated and I know he is forgetting his surroundings, and to be honest, so am I.

Seonghwa and Jongho are still in the room and the others would come any minute, not to mention a staff member could arrive too. I need to put my sensible head on and stop the kiss now. Reluctantly, I pull my lips away. His eyes are dark as he looks down at me, trying to catch his breath. “Sorry, got a little carried away there.” he says quietly

“It is ok.” I smile at him, pecking his lips.

“I.. erm, should go to the toilet before we get called on stage.” He says as his cheeks suddenly flush pink. I nod and let go of him. He walks rather awkwardly towards the bathroom, his hands covering his lower part, and I realise he has a boner. Instantly I feel my own cheeks heat at this and look towards Seonghwa and Jongho who are sitting on the sofa, scrolling on their phones. Either they are so occupied with what they are doing on their phones they weren’t aware of what was going on or they are trying to look like they were busy. Either way, I am thankful there is no teasing.

One by one, each of the other guys comes into the room. All their performance outfits for this comeback have been amazing, however, this last set is definitely my favourite and I feel like the stylists have left the best ones for last. Each outfit suits them so well, and I can see how comfortable they feel in them too. Not to mention how hot they look too! My horny teenager side coming out once more. I try my best to calm myself down and stop thinking dirty thoughts. Especially when a sleeveless San sits next to me and rests his hand on my thigh as we all talk.

“Time to go to the stage now.” Myeonjin says as he comes into the room.

“Good luck!” I smile as they all get ready.

“Come with us.” Yunho says taking my hand into his. “You can watch from the side of the stage.” His smile shining brightly as he looks down at me.

“Am I even allowed to?” I ask.

“Of course.”

“We want you there.” Hongjoong says

“All of us.” I hear Jongho say from beside me, causing me to look at him. He is looking at me in a way I’ve never seen him do before, and it makes my tummy flip. “So please come.” I look around at them all, smiling at me, and I nod. Of course I want to be with them, there isn’t anywhere else I’d rather be.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

The apartment is quiet tonight. San, Wooyoung and Jongho are having a night out with some of their idol friends they haven’t seen for a while. Yunho had left to go home straight from the studio after the final round of fancalls finished while Seonghwa, Hongjoong, San and Wooyoung were leaving tomorrow. I was pleased for them because they deserve it and I know how it is to miss your family, but I also knew I would miss them, too.

Saying goodbye to Yunho was difficult, and I wasn’t expecting to feel the emotions that I did when he was leaving. It made me realise that my feelings for not just him, but the others, were slowly growing. He hugged me for as long as he could until Hongjoong had to come into the room and tell him it was time to leave. Before he left, he kissed me and whispered that he would miss me, promised to text and send photos while he was away, too. I told him “Don’t! Just enjoy the break and spending time with your family!” The kiss he gave me before he finally left was long and lingering. It wasn’t heated but I could definitely feel his emotions through it and I felt like his lips were still on mine the entire car ride home as I sat looking out the window. I wasn’t certain, but it felt like he was finding it difficult, too. Or maybe it was all just in my head.

When we got home, I went straight to my bedroom to take out my contact lenses and get changed into my pyjamas. I also just wanted a moment of being alone, too. I was adjusting well to going from living completely alone to with 8 men, especially men who are very attentive to me, but there were times I just needed a bit of solitude. Thankfully, the guys appeared to know when I needed to be alone and didn’t question it.

When I told Hongjoong about the bipolar, he asked if there were things I ever needed and I told him space was one of them, especially when I would feel overwhelmed. Rarely, but from time to time I just need to be by myself for a little bit. So I wasn’t sure if he’d told them to give me time alone or if they just intuitively knew when I needed it. They left me be, gave me the time I needed, then didn’t make a fuss when I came back to them either, and I appreciated it.

As I walk into the lounge, it feels weird having the apartment so quiet. I don’t quite know what to do with myself, but there is only one person I need to see right now. I go upstairs and knock on Seonghwa and Hongjoongs bedroom door. I hear Seonghwa say to come in.

“Hey Luna.” he smiles at me

I can see a pile of clean washing on his bed that he is putting away. His already packed suitcase for tomorrow is sitting beside the bedroom door. It makes me smile lightly at how organised he is and I hope that some of it will rub off on me as I am the most disorganised, ‘wait until the last minute then freak out’ person ever!

I walk over to the window and look out at the skyline. I honestly love the view from their apartment, especially at night time. You can see Han River in the distance. It is honestly a beautiful view. I feel Seonghwa wrap his arms around my waist from behind.

“You okay?” I hear him ask.

“Yeah, I am.” I turn around and smile at him.

“You sure? You were quiet on the drive home and then went straight to your bedroom.” he says.

“I haven’t been sleeping well recently but I am honestly ok.” I reply as he kisses the top of my head. “So don’t worry!”

“Hopefully, with the break from work we all have and your family coming to visit, you can relax and we can get you back into a good sleep pattern again.” he says

“‘we’?” I ask, smiling as I look up at him

“Yes, ‘we’!” he smiles back at me as he pecks my lips. “I know most of us are going away for a couple of days, but whatever we can do to help you, we will.”

“I’ll be fine in a day or two.” I sigh happily.

We spend a few more minutes cuddling before I pull away from him. He goes back over to his side of the bedroom and picks up a shirt from his bed, placing it on a hanger. I go over to the display cabinet with his Lego Star Wars creations and look at them. It brings back happy memories of my dad and I spending an entire day just building, just the two of us. My eyes fall onto Hongjoongs bed. An open suitcase is sitting on it, some clothes haphazardly thrown inside it.

“Where’s Hongjoong?” I ask Seonghwa

“Where do you think?” He replies, laughing.

“Is he seriously at his studio tonight?” I ask in shock, turning to look at him. “He is going home tomorrow morning!”

“Thought you would have known by now the man pretty much lives there.” He says. “He got changed and left straight away.”

“Of course I knew that, but you guys have finished work for a few days. I didn’t expect him to be at the studio tonight.” I reply.

“Did you come to see Hongjoong then?” he asks me as he is hanging up a clean sweater and I feel nervous.

“Not really.” I say, my fingers fiddling with the bottom of my t-shirt.

“So you wanted me?” he teases, turning around to face me as I nod, feeling the heat rush to my face. I hate how shy I get around them sometimes, as I am not a shy person. I feel his hand cup my face, causing me to jump lightly as I hadn’t realised he had crossed the room to me. “You know Hongjoong won’t be back until like 3am. So we have this room to ourselves for a few hours.” His hands gently tilt my head to look up at him. He has that devilish look on his face, the same one he has had on his face for the past 3 weeks on stage. The one that has caused me to need to stop watching him and the others because of the effect they’ve all been having on me. “And there is also no one else in the apartment, either.”

“Hwa!” I blush as he pushes my hair behind my ear and puts his head beside it.

“I saw how you watched us earlier.” His voice is low and I can feel his breath on my ear. “When we were on stage.” His hands move lower. “The way you slightly bit your lower lip, your thighs rubbing together subtly.” His hand slides into my pyjama bottoms. “And now here you are, in my bedroom....” his fingertips slip past the waistband of my underwear and I cannot help the small moan that escapes my mouth as his fingers glide through my wet folds. “…and ready for me.” There is no denying how extremely turned on I am now. “So, my darling, just tell me what you want and I’ll give you it.”

“You.” I whimper as I feel his fingertip slide in and circle my clit lightly

“I didn’t quite hear that.” He teases, pulling his finger out.

“You.” I say louder. “I want you, Hwa.”

“I love it when you call me Hwa.” He says, his voice low before he captures my lips.

He catches me off guard, causing me to step backwards, but I recover quickly, kiss him back hard and wrap my arms around his shoulders as he removes his hand out of my pyjamas and tugging down on the waistband. He pulls them off along with my underwear and lifts me up. Instinctively, my legs wrap around his waist as he moves over to the desk in the room’s corner. He places me on it and continues to kiss me, his tongue massaging against mine.

My hands move from his shoulders to the bottom of his t-shirt, tugging at it, and our lips separate as I quickly pull it over his head and throw it on the floor beside us. “Tell me again who you want.” he presses his forehead against mine as I feel his fingers slide into my folds once more.

“I want you.” I moan lightly. My hands hold on to his shoulders to steady myself.

“I can’t hear you.” His voice is laced with desire.

“You Hwa! I want you! Please!” I beg loudly

“I am all yours.” he smirks before dropping to his knees. He swiftly throws my legs over his shoulders and kisses my inner thighs. My fingers thread through his hair as he opens my legs further. His kisses stop and he places his hands softly on my thighs.

I look down to see why he’s stopped and I see him looking at the bruises from my night with Mingi. Although they were in the early stages of fading, it was still clear imprints of the fingerprints he had left on me from holding onto my thighs and hips so hard. Seonghwas hands touch over them delicately, examining them closely with his eyes. I open my mouth to say that I am ok but stop when he smirks up at me. “This is really sexy!” I can’t help but smile back at him.

He continues to kiss my thighs, his hands moving under my knees to push my legs back, opening me more. My eyes close as his mouth moves higher.

“Oh, fuck…” I moan as his tongue flicks against my clit, my fingers tighten in his hair.

From the start, he is relentless. His tongue moves quickly, licking and sucking at my clit. Instantly, my back arches from the pleasure and I nearly fall backwards. One of my hands falls from his head and I place it surface behind me to keep my balance. Within minutes I can feel myself becoming undone, my fingers tighten in his hair as his mouth ravishes me. I bite my lip to muffle the noises coming from me, but he stops what he is doing.

“You better not be holding back!” He says. “We are home alone.”

“Someone might come home, though.” I whine in a little annoyance that he has stopped when I was so close.

“They won’t.” He smirks, coming back up to kiss me and I feel him put a finger inside me. “Let’s take advantage of this rare moment where we don’t need to be quiet.” His lips capture mine once more as he slides another one in. He continues to kiss me deeply as he curls them to hit my spot with each thrust, causing me to moan into the kiss and my body to jerk against him. “Now let me get back to making you feel even better than you are already feeling.”

He goes back down to his knees again and wastes no time in putting his tongue on me as his fingers continue to thrust inside of me. This time, I don’t hold back, allowing whatever weird noises want to come out of me and just let myself feel good. The feeling of both his fingers inside me and his tongue against my clit has me on the edge again.

“Hwa…. I am going to come!” I moan.

“That is my intention, darling.” he says, his voice laced with smugness

His movements increase. He sucks harshly on my clit, and within seconds, I am coming. As my legs try to close instinctively, he pulls his fingers out of me and holds my legs open further as he continues to eat me out at a fast pace.

“S-seonghwa!” I moan loudly, my fingers tugging on his hair harshly

He groans into me as his hands grip onto my thighs tighter, pushing my legs further apart. I am struggling to keep myself upright as the arm supporting my weight gives out. I am thankful the space behind me is clear as I fall backwards, the back of my head resting on the wall now. Seonghwa is not letting up either, his tongue pushing inside of me now as he continues to groan loudly, making a second orgasm hit harder than the first.

“T-too much!” I pant as his mouth moves faster against me, which I didn’t think was humanly possible.

“And yet you are still grinding against my face like you want more!” He says, pulling his mouth off me. He is right. It is as if my body craves more of him despite it being over sensitive. “Give me one more orgasm and then I’ll let you rest.”

“I need you inside me now.” I whine lightly. “Please, Hwa! I want your dick inside me!” I have never in my life begged so shamefully like this! He suddenly stands up, putting his hands on either side of my neck, his lips so close to mine that I can feel his hot breath.

“You want my dick?” he asks, his lips ghost over mine. “Want me to fuck you?” I nod desperately. “Such a needy girl!” I lean forward to kiss him, but he pulls his head back.

“Seonghwa!” I pout as he laughs. I lean forward again, but he pulls back, laughing even more. “Stop it!!” I laugh too.

“You are so fucking cute when you get annoyed!” he grins at me before kissing me and lifting me up once more. He carries me over to his bed and puts me on it. I watch as he shoves his clean washing on the floor and pulls his sweats down.

“Wow, has THE Park Seonghwa just made a mess?” I giggle as he takes a condom from his bedside drawer. “Throwing his clean clothes on the floor?”

“I washed the floor this morning and used the roller on it then hoovered when I got home so I know for a fact that floor is not dirty.” he laughs in reply

“I didn’t say your floor is dirty!” I say, smirking at him. “I simply said that you made a mess of the very tidy floor.”

“Luna, do you want me to fuck you or do you want me to start cleaning?” he asks, getting on the bed and pulling my legs harshly towards him so I slide down the bed. “Because you know I will do it! And once I start, I won’t stop!”

“Fucking or cleaning?” I ask back as I watch him put the condom on.

“You are being a bit of a brat tonight!” he states, leaning down on top of me, his face close to mine. His facial expression is unreadable to me. I can’t see what he is thinking and for a second, I think I have actually pissed him off with my banter until his mouth curls into a smirk. “Now, are you going to be a good girl and let me fuck you?” I nod as he kisses me before leaning back.

His hands push my t-shirt up and over my head, throwing it onto the floor with the rest of the clothes. We are both naked now and he is looking down at my body with dark, lust-filled eyes. “So pretty.” he says as his hands run down my body and move under my knees. He pushes them together and up towards my chest, leaning forward, trapping my legs between our bodies. I feel him push himself inside of me in one swift movement and immediately thrusts in and out. He gives me no time to adjust to him being inside, but it feels good from the start. The noises coming from him are deep and almost feral. It is turning me on even more. “You feel so fucking good.”

With each thrust, he is going harder and faster. My head is becoming clouded and my toes are going numb as my body shakes with the pleasure he is giving me. His eyes are closed and I can see he is completely lost in the moment. I try to hold on to his arms, but it is like my body has no strength and my hands just keep falling down. My entire body feels weak as he thrusts sharply into me. Every movement is hitting my g-spot with perfect precision and with the combination of how fast he is thrusting into me and the way my legs are folded between our bodies, unable to move I am feeling incredibly overwhelmed too and I try to speak, but nothing is coming out. Everything feels too intense.

“Are you still with me?” he asks softly, slowing his movements down

“My… head… feels fuzzy.” I mumble in reply as he gently puts my legs down onto the bed on either side of his hips and leans down on top of me, his elbows supporting his weight.

“Do you want me to stop?” His hips stilling.

“No! Please don’t stop!” I attempt to grasp onto him as I feel him move back from me. “Don’t leave!”

“Hey, it is ok! I have you, my darling. I won’t leave you.” he whispers soothingly, kissing my lips. “I won’t stop, but I am going to slow down, though.” I feel his hips move again, but slower than before. “Is this ok?” I nod my head. “Am I being too rough?” He asks.

“No.” I shake my head. “You aren’t being rough.” My voice is slightly shaky and I am praying he doesn’t notice it.

“I never want to hurt you.” He says. “Or get carried away, and it causes you any pain or discomfort.”

“You never could.” I can hold on to his face now that my body is relaxing again. “You were actually making me feel really good. It was just intense and I… I am still not used to feeling this… good during actual sex.” I can feel my entire face heat up in slight embarrassment at this.

“I understand.” He says so soothingly it is almost a whisper. I look up at him and see him looking down at me with the softest look. “While I am glad that I can make you feel good during it, I don’t want to you to feel overwhelmed like that.” I pull his lips towards mine and kiss him again. He is still slowly and gently thrusting into me. I can feel my orgasm building again, so I move my hips to match his movements as our kisses become needy. I pull my legs higher around his waist, causing a slight change in the angle of his thrusts. My walls clench around him, causing him to groan loudly into my mouth. “Fuck Luna!”

“Feels good.” I whimper as his forehead touches mine. “G-go faster please, baby!”

“Are you sure?” He asks, staring deeply into my eyes as I nod in reply. “If it gets too intense again, let me know.”

I move my left hand to his waist and hold on to him, as his hips increases in speed, but I can feel him holding back. My right hand is still on his cheek. I tilt his head so his lips meet mine. He starts to move faster, grunts and groans being passed from his mouth to mine as he lets himself go once more.

“Hwa, you are making me feel good!” I moan, my body moving with him.

“I’m so close, baby.” he mumbles as I clench around him again. I muster up all the strength I can get to push him to roll over. Thankfully, he takes the hint, holding onto me as he rolls onto his back, and I am lying on top of him now. My knees are on the bedding, on either side of his hips as I start to move against him. One of his hands holds onto my ass tightly as the other gathers my hair into a ponytail, and he pulls my head down to his. His kisses are frantic from the start, and I can feel how close he is. With every back-and-forth movement, I am getting closer to my own release. I can feel it just there but I can’t reach it.

Seonghwas groans are becoming louder as his hand in my hair tightens and his hips move, matching my pace. I pull my lips away from his and look into his eyes.

“What can I do to help you come darling?” he asks

“I.. need to sit up.” I reply, pushing myself upright. His hands instantly move to my hips to help steady me as I settle down on him. I let out an unstable breathe as my body shakes a little at how much deeper he is inside of me.

“Are you ok?” he asks me

“I am… the angle is deeper. It is good, though.” I place my hands on top of his that are still holding my hips as I begin to move again. The new angle is hitting me perfectly and I can feel my release approaching again. “Shit, Hwa that’s it!”

“Oh.. fuck!” he groans, his head falling back onto the bed. His hands suddenly move underneath mine, flipping over so our fingers intertwine. “You are taking me so well! I am gonna come!”

I can use the leverage of his hands holding mine to steady myself better and I get into a good rhythm. The noises Seonghwa is making are so deep and loud. We are both being loud now.

As I feel myself start to come, my fingers tighten in his hands and I lean down, pushing our hands so they are flat against the bed above his head. I press my lips against his as I keep moving on top of him. Lewd noises spilling from us both as he comes at the same time as my high finally hits hard. My head falls into his neck as I try to regain my breath. We are both panting so hard as our bodies come down from our joint highs. I let go of his hands and run my fingertips through his sweat soaked hair.

“You are amazing!” He sighs, his hand caressing my lower back.

“So are you, baby.” I reply, kissing lightly at his neck. I can taste the sweetness of the sweat on his skin on my lips as I continue to kiss him and he makes contented sighs.

The room is silent, as I stay laying on top of him, my face buried happily into his neck. We stay like this for a while, just enjoying the comfortable silence and being close to one another.

“Come on, let’s get you cleaned up.” he finally says, sitting upright while holding onto my waist. He lifts me out of the bed so easily and takes me into his bathroom. It is my first time seeing it and it’s massive. 2 sinks, a walk-in shower and a separate bathtub.

“You guys have a bath in here?!” I ask when I see it

“Well, I was going to put you into the shower but seeing how big your eyes just got, I am definitely making you a bubble bath!” he chuckles, sitting me on one of the worktops. He pulls off the used condom, tying it and throwing it in the little bin before lifting his black bath robe from the hanger on the wall and wraps it around me “Don’t want you getting cold.” he smiles, tying it around my waist before kissing me. “You look so tiny wearing this.” He chuckles, he affectionately rubs his nose against mine and pecks my lips again.

I watch as he starts the bath. He opens a box that has a lot of different bath bombs in it, asking me to pick one. I pick up a pink one and smell it. It smells of cherries and I instantly like it. “That one is my favourite.” He smiles

“I’ll pick another one then.” I say, but he takes it from my hand and drops it into the running water before I can say anything. “Seonghwa! Why did you do that? It’s your favourite!”

“Because I could see you liked it.” He replies, his hands cup my cheeks. He places a series of kisses on my lips as I smile widely. “I’ll let you use the toilet. I’ll be back in a few minutes.” He kisses the top of my head. He leaves the bathroom, closing the door behind himself and I stand up. I am thankful he’s given me the privacy to use the toilet, as I was desperate for a pee!

After I’ve used it, I wash my hands before leaning over the bathtub to smell the amazing scent coming from the water. The water has turned a beautiful shade of pink and it makes me smile as I dip my hand into it, checking the temperature. It is perfectly hot. It is has been so long since I had an actual bath as my old apartment only had a small basic shower and I am looking forward to this. I hear a knock at the door and see him peek his head in before he walks in. He has put on a pair of boxers but is still topless and as he comes over to turn off the water; I notice a small red mark on his neck, near his collarbone.

“What is it?” He asks as he sees me staring

“Don’t freak out but I.. I think I may have… given you a love bite.” I say nervously, motioning to his neck. He turns around to look in the mirror and touches the mark. “Sorry, I didn’t even notice I did that!” It must have been when I was kissing his neck after we had finished and still in that post sex haze.

“Do not apologise, I love it!” He grins, turning back to hug me. “My little vampire!”

“You aren’t mad?” I ask, looking at him as he shakes his head.

“Absolutely not!” He replies, kissing me. “Now get into the bath before it gets cold!”

Seonghwa helps to take the robe off me and I feel cold, as it was so warm and comfortable. He holds my hand as I step into the bath. As soon as I sit down in the hot water, I feel my body instantly relax. “You aren’t going to join me?” I ask him as he sits on the floor beside the tub.

“Do you want me to?” he asks back, a faint hint of a smirk on his face

“You have made me the most perfect bubble bath, and I want to enjoy it with you, my boyfriend.” I say, reaching out to hold his hand. The little smirk instantly drops, and he smiles so softly at me. “So please, join me!” He presses the back of my hand against his lips and nuzzles his cheek into it.

“You know I cannot say no to you ever.” He whispers, standing up. I lean forward to make room for him behind me as he takes off his boxers and climbs in. He settles in behind me and I lay back against him. His hands wrap around my body. I feel instantly serene in his arms. The smell of the bubble bath, the warmth of his skin and his hands on me.

“These look fresh.” He says, his fingers tracing the bruises on my thighs. “I am not prying, just wanting to check you are ok.”

“I am absolutely fine. Mingi didn’t hurt me at all. He didn’t even know, to be honest, and I didn’t let him see them the following morning in case he thought he had.” I suddenly realise I’ve said Mingis name. “Sorry, I probably shouldn’t have told you that!” I add quickly, my heart suddenly racing. “Please don’t tell him!!” I sit upright.

“It is ok!” He says quickly pulling me back into his arms. “It’s ok.” He soothes kissing my temple

“You said one rule was not talking about what we did, though.” I say.

“That is mainly between the guys, so you don’t think we are talking about you behind your back. You are free to talk about whatever you want to with us, though. Only if you feel comfortable enough. The guys and I agreed in advance it was ok if you wanted to talk about anything with us. We are all in this relationship together.” He says, one of his hands rubbing comforting circles on my stomach, the other resting under my breasts. “You don’t need to worry about that or feel you can’t talk to us either.”

“Makes sense.” I nod slightly. “Mingi wasn’t being rough with me or hurting me. I bruise really easily, so I usually have one somewhere on my body, anyway.” I turn my head to look at him again. “Plus, I kinda like sex bruises, too. So I don’t mind them.”

“You are definitely a kinky little thing, aren’t you?” He laughs, kissing me.

“You know, I will definitely have more tomorrow from you.” I say to him. “You were holding onto my legs pretty hard earlier on.”

“As long as you aren’t hurting from them.” he replies

“Only in a good way.” I smirk at him before letting out a small laugh.

“You really are kinky.” he laughs again. “You are going to keep us all on our toes.” He adds softly into my ear.

I rest my hands on his knees as we continue to relax in the warm water. The scent of the bath bomb is comforting for us both. The closeness and intimacy of having a bath together is making me feel happy.

“Are you looking forward to going home tomorrow?” I ask him.

“I am. It’s been a while since I saw my family.” he replies.

“What do you normally do when you go back home?” His hand under my breast soothingly cups one of my breasts. There is nothing sexual behind it at all.

“Our house is in the country, middle of nowhere. There isn’t a lot to do like here in Seoul. It is quiet and peaceful. We go on walks. My dad usually fires up the fire pit at night time and we just sit around, toasting marshmallows and talking. I love it.” he answers, kissing my temple as I smile at the thought of it. He deserves this break so much to rest and be happy. “You must be looking forward to your family arriving on Tuesday.”

“I cannot wait to see them!” I smile as my fingers rub the skin on his knees on either side of me. “The girls are going to be so big! Are you nervous about meeting my parents?”

“A little. I know you told me your dad will put on his scary army face, but that he isn’t scary. However, I am still nervous. I’ve never met a girlfriend’s parents before.” he says.

“You don’t have to be nervous. My dad has already told me he likes you, so there is a chance of no scary army face. If he does, my mom will reign him in! She wears the pants in that relationship. He does whatever she says.” I laugh. “So don’t be nervous. The plan is on Thursday to have a nice, quiet, relaxed, home cooked meal at the apartment they’ve rented. No pressure.”

“Will the twins be there too?” he asks, his head resting against mine as I lean back further into him

“No, they’ll be staying the night with my Uncle Jihoon and Aunt Soomin. So it will just be the 4 of us. Like I said, no pressure.” I answer.

Truth be told, I am feeling rather nervous myself. With my mom knowing me inside and out, I am worried she’ll know there is something more to my relationship with Seonghwa. I can only pray that on Thursday night we look like any other normal, regular boyfriend and girlfriend, and that my mom suspects nothing. I feel Seonghwa place a kiss on the side of my head, pulling me from my worried thoughts, and I smile. I don’t want to worry anymore, I just want to enjoy this precious alone time with Seonghwa.

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