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imcrazyboutchoo-blog · 12 years

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Chapter 2.

Sam’s POV.

I jumped, frightened with tears running down my face. I looked around my room, trying to find the tissue box that would usually be on my bedside table to my left, until I realised that I was actually sprawled out on the middle of my bedroom floor. The early morning sun that was streaming through my window was extremely bright and hurt my eyes. I rolled over and pulled the doona over my head. It pulled at the stitches and I yelped like a dog. I realised I was shaking and had silent tears still running down my face.

I wipe them away with my jumper sleeve, and curl up in a ball under the doona and stay there until I run out of breathable air. Recovering from a nightmare is totally not my piece of cake. Especially one that was unbelievably realistic. I was 12 again, sitting in the backseat of the car watching my father die, I had this nightmare every couple of nights. I’ve been having it since the day it happened. That was what made me become a horrible child, depressed and always getting into trouble. I used to sit in the shower crying, slicing my arm up. I’ve stopped, haven’t for a month. But there is still 5 years’ worth of scars on my arms, thighs and stomach. Nobody has noticed the scars, unless they are just too scared to say something or don’t really care. Each one has a thousand tears behind it.

I sat up and ruffled my hair. Remember I don’t have school today, I stood and walked to my window, drawing the curtains back so that the sun hit my body. The sky was clear and a nice blue, birds playing in the trees. I lifted the window and stuck my head out, inhaling the fresh spring air. It was a little cold still but it was warming up fast. I guessed it be about 11 in the morning. I grabbed my towel and plodded down the hall to the bathroom in the clothes I wore yesterday. I had a hot shower, washing my hair and being careful with my black eye and stitched head. When I got out of the shower, I wrapped myself in my towel and wandered back to my room. I sat down in my computer chair, spinning to face my closet. Clothes were everywhere. I spotted my favourite sun dress. I hated wearing dresses but this one made me feel good about myself. I got dressed and found my gladiator shoes. The gold and silver shoes match the grey and gold dress. I looked in the bathroom mirror at my face and decided I’d wear my hair out, again. I let it hang naturally, not even pinning my hair back. It dried nicely, not going fluffy.

I grabbed my wallet and phone and headed to the shops to see if I could do what I wanted to do yesterday before I discovered them famous kids. I can’t even remember the name of the band. I shut the door behind me and pull out my phone, checking to see if I have any text messages. I see my reflection in my phone screen and realise my black eye is gross, so I run back up the path to the house and grab my sun glasses from the lounge room. They are black and cover most of the bruise, I guess it will have to do.

After what feels like forever of walking, I can finally see Starbucks. I decide to get a hot chocolate because I was in the mood, and after a few minutes it was ready. I grab it and head off, not wanting to waste too much time. I walked the next two blocks to the shopping centre not really paying attention to my surroundings. I see that the stage was still set up from yesterday’s little teaser performance. I instantly imagine the blonde boy, strumming his guitar, how each note was perfection. I regret running away before hearing his voice. All I know is that he is blonde and isn’t as tall as the rest of the boys are. As I walk past the stage to the entrance, I notice a jacket lying on the ground behind the stage. I checked to make sure no one was looking, when I thought the coast was clear I half jogged, half skipped to the jacket. I pick it up, examining it for any signs of contact details or something. It was still warm from someone wearing it recently, I checked the tag and see Louis written in bold. I tried to remember back to when the broad-shouldered boy was saying their names. Liam, no that was the speaker, Harry and Louis. LOUIS! I look around for any signs on girls going crazy, but notice nothing. So I hang on to it, hopefully finding someone who will know where to find them. It’s quite an expensive jacket, don’t want it getting wrecked by just lying there.

I walked into the shopping centre, ignoring people staring at me for still wearing my sunnies. I refused to take them off, knowing that a few of the people here would recognise me, and attack me with questions. I headed to my favourite store, the pet shop. I love going in and having a look at the puppies and kittens. Knowing I’d never be able to afford to look after one. Whilst watching two puppies chase each other around the pen, I notice out the shop window that a group of girls ran towards the wide open area in the shopping centre screaming. I figured that the boys were back. I said goodbye to the puppies and followed in their general direction, not screaming, not running, not knocking people over. I just walked calmly towards yet another stage set up. This one wasn’t as big, it was the same stage that the kids holidays entertainment uses. As I got closer I realised that there wasn’t a lot of girls around, only 20 or so. I guess none of them knew, or they weren’t allowed to get out of school two days in a row. I walk up so I’m standing two metres behind all the screaming girls, even with such a small amount of them they can make a lot of noise.

I hear the same voice from yesterday, Liam it was, speaking to the girls at the front, without a microphone I could barely hear him, but I knew he was talking to them because the girls got louder. He stepped back onto the 60cm high stage, so that everyone could see him. He looked at all of us, scanning our faces you could say. I probably looked really confused because he looked at my expression and laughed. I remembered what I came here to do, I raised my hand in the air above my head, holding the jacket up so he could see it. He looked confused and then realisation hit and he shook his head smiling. He stuck his head through the curtain to the back of the stage obviously calling the boy by the name of Louis. Liam stepped back out and Louis followed him, scanning the crowd for me. I still stood there with my arm in the air holding the jacket up. I wave it a bit and he then sees me, Louis stepped down off the stage and hopped over the rope barrier. The girls got all excited, he said ‘Hi’ to them not being rude, but he kept saying ‘Excuse me, pardon me, coming through.’ When he finally broke free from the crowd of girls I was laughing a little. I held the jacket out to him, he took a few steps towards me and took the jacket gently out of my hands. I turned to walk away but he grabbed my arm before I could take a step. I turned and looked at him, he had closed the distance and we were now only a metre apart. I looked down at my arm realising my scars weren’t hidden, I became extremely self-conscious in a matter of seconds. I politely pulled my arm out of his grasp, folding them in front of me to hide the thousands of scars.

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Louis said, looking down. “I’m Louis by the way, I didn’t quite catch your name.” He looked up smiling.

“Hi, I’m Samantha.” I looked down at my feet, letting my hair fall to cover my blush.

“Well Samantha, how can I thank you enough? I thought I’d lost this forever, that some fan probably kept it.” He chuckled, I looked up and noticed he was watching my face. Scanning, waiting for that crazy fan girl to appear.

“It’s okay, it looked like someone would miss it. It was pure luck finding you here.” I smiled.

“Thanks, well I’d better get back. Are you going to stay for the performance?” He searched my face again for any sign of me cracking.

“No. I have things to do.” I looked down at my feet again.

“Okay then.” He sighed. “Samantha, why are you wearing sunnies inside?” He asked before he fully turned.

“I... Uhh... Uhm... I have to go.” I say spinning on my heel and walking away. I needed fresh air, so I sat on a swing at the park across the road. Not really swinging because I was in a dress, but still swaying a little.

After I thought was a decent enough amount of time, I went back over to the shopping centre. I knew my way around this place like it was the back of my hand. I still hadn’t eaten so my stomach was going crazy. I walked in the direction of the food court, swerving in and out of the groups of people. I passed the stage again and found it deserted. Good.

Once in the food court, I stood there for a second deciding where to go. My stomach was calling for a foot long sub. I turned and headed towards subway, once there it was a simple matter of asking for my usual. The girl who was working often served me and knew what I always get, 6inch meatball sub with cheese. I paid and took the bag off the counter. Before I ate, I wanted to go and try to find a decent shirt to buy Liz’ dad for his birthday. I found a shop that was chock-a-block full of polo’s, his favourite. I wandered in, looking around, flicking through some of the shirts. I almost ran into a blonde boy, about 2inches taller than me. I looked up and saw his amazing blue and green eyes. I got lost immediately, my jaw dropped. I realised he was staring at me too, I felt stupid. I clenched my jaw shut and looked down, my face turning a horrible red colour. Whilst still staring at my feet, I noticed everything was a lot brighter, and then I saw my glasses on the ground. I gasped and shot down to pick them up and place them gently back on my head. When I stood up straight and looked at the boy again, all I could see in his expression was pain. His jaw was hanging open and his eyes seemed watery.

“S-s-sorry” I mumbled and turned to flee, but his arm caught my elbow. I looked down at his hand, clutching my elbow with force, but gentle enough not to crush a butterfly. I turned to see his face a now hardened, emotionless mask. Even with the bitterness, his face was flawless. His jaw, so sexy, the way he had his beach blonde hair styled. His lips, looked as soft as pillows, and the vein in his neck, I could see it pounding.

“Are you okay?” He asked, his thick accent hit me like a brick wall.

“Y-yeah.” I was shaking.

“Liar.” He chuckled. He let go of my elbow and raised the same hand to my face. When I realised what he was doing, my brain was telling me to step away from this stranger and run home, but my body didn’t respond. I stood there motionless as he slowly and gently pulled the sun glasses from my face. Revealing my ugly black eye, he gasped and I looked down, trying to fight back the tears. He could see the silent sobs shaking my body, reaching out his hand, he put three fingers under chin and lifted my head. Sparks went flying through my body, starting at where his fingers touched my skin.

“What happened?” This boy is really odd.

“I got decked at school yesterday.” I blurted out.

“At school? School is meant to be a safe haven.” The boy gasped.

“Yeah well, it’s my second worst nightmare.” I flinch when I realise I’m telling my emotions to this boy I don’t even know.

“Hmm.” He is thinking.

“Oh, the red one would suit you better.” I say, pointing to the two polo’s in his other hand. He looked down and let out a cute laugh.

“Thanks, I was having trouble deciding. Names Niall.” He flashed me the cutest smile, and looked into my eyes.

“Uhh… Samantha.” I manage to get out.

“Here are you glasses and here is my token of appreciation for helping me choose, and also my apology for running into you.” He takes his hand from my chin and leans in and gives me a cute peck on the cheek. He stands back smiling, holding my glasses out to me. I can tell my face just went bright red, without thinking about my scars, I reach my arm out, holding it palm up.

He looks down to place the sun glasses into my palm but notices the scars, and he stares and then looks at me again. I don’t remember the tears starting but I’m suddenly full on sobbing and crying, I snatch the glasses from his hand and run out of the store, completely forgetting about a present for Liz’ dad.

Back at the house I’m lying on my bed. I decide to try and find Louis on twitter. I sit in my computer chair, and open my laptop. I open up twitter and search for Louis, a whole list of Louis’ appeared but at the top was the one I was looking for. I looked at his picture, and smiled. Remembering the boy I met early this morning. I followed him and decided to check out his tweets. I nearly fell off my chair when I read the first one.

‘Louis Tomlinson: had a good time performing another small concert teaser at the Morkton shopping centre. Met a beautiful girl, wow.’

‘Louis Tomlinson: So a girl just brought my jacket to me. Turns out it wasn’t lost forever. Much appreciated, thank you so much. :)’

‘Louis Tomlinson: Lost the jacket that my mother gave to me, as a good luck for my X-factor audition. Extremely devastated. Louis you idiot.’

I was so glad I decided to find its owner. The jacket obviously meant a lot to him. I was about to close my laptop when a little ding went off. It meant something happened on twitter. I clicked my profile and discovered that Louis had followed me back, I smiled. I decided to write a tweet and see what his reaction would be.

‘Samantha Moore: Being shy, sucks balls. Meeting a cute guy, highlight to my day.’

Within seconds of posting I had a message from Louis.

‘Hey Samantha, it’s Louis, you know. Jacket boy. Well, here is my number, 0425483069. Please text me. – Louis x’

I smiled and giggled as I ran to get my phone. I came back and sat down at the computer, saving Louis’ number into my phone. I decided to text him as he asked me too.

‘Hey Jacket boy. Please just call me Sam.’

‘Hey Sam, I do believe you owe me an explanation.’

‘Not yet. Don’t want to talk about please. Sorry.’

‘Don’t be sorry, it’s okay. We’ll talk about it when you want to.’

‘Thanks’

‘Oh and by the way, you looked stunning today.’

‘Oh.. Uh thanks.?’

‘Hey, why aren’t you in school. You don’t look old enough to be out yet.’

‘I’m 17 thank you very much! I finish at the end of next semester. Uhh, glasses story.’

‘Oh, I see. Come for a walk on the beach?’

‘I live on the other side of town from the beach.’

‘I’ll come get you. I’ll have Liam and his girlfriend Danielle, if you don’t mind.’

‘Are you asking me out on a date Louis?’

‘NO!’

‘Sure whatever, and yes I’d love to come.’

‘Great :D Where about do you live?’

‘Anzac Parade.’

‘Be there in 20 minutes. Don’t get changed, stay in what you wore today.’

‘Alright, see you soon.’

I sighed as I sent that last text. I was going out on my first date, even if Louis didn’t classify it as a date, I did. I ran to the bathroom to make sure my hair was still decent. It didn’t look any different. I couldn’t think of anything that could cover my arms, so I just had to hope Louis doesn’t notice. I walk out into the lounge room and wrote a note for mum in case she came home.

“Gone to beach with friends, love Sam x”

I stuck it on the fridge, and checked the time. Louis said he’d be here in five, because I didn’t tell him what number I live, I was going to wait out on the front veranda. I wandered out not really paying attention, just trying to calm myself and get rid of this smile.

#onedfanfic #one direction #niall horan #louis tomlinson #zayn malik #harry styles #liam payne #nialler #larry #ziam #fanfic

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imcrazyboutchoo-blog · 12 years

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Chapter 1.

Sam’s POV.

Ugh, I have always hated Mondays. They just always seem to bring this drizzly horrible feeling to school. School. Oh crap.

I jump up out of bed flinging bed sheets, pillows and teddies all across my room. I quickly glance at the clock on my bedside table, it reads 8:10. I have 10 minutes to hurry and get ready before my bus gets here. Thankfully I don’t take long to get ready, so I just crazily dress myself in my red converse, light grey skinny jeans and a plain black singlet with my favourite grey hoodie. I stick my head in the bathroom sink and wet my hair, then panicked about time so I pulled my brush through my brown, slightly wavy hair. It reaches just past my boobs when it’s out. I can’t be bothered to do anything fancy with it so I shake my head, and push my fringe out of my eyes and head off, ready to tackle the last week of school. I walk out of my room, bag slung over my shoulder picking up the books I need, my house keys and I remember to take my phone off charge in the lounge room.

The house seems eerily quiet, maybe mum was working this morning. Explains why I wasn’t woken up by her. As I come up with this solution, I hear the breaks of the bus screech and complain as the old worn down bus stops outside my house waiting for me. I walk outside and shut the door making sure it’s locked. I quickly run up the steps of the bus and head to the back seat. As always the bus is nearly empty, only a few kids here and there. I sit down in my usually seat in the left corner of the back seat and watch the neighbourhood fly by and slowly wake up. The fog is blocking most of the sun out so it still looks pretty dark, but there is a chilly wind, great.

Being 17 and almost finished school altogether is amazing, just another semester and then I am done. I am an only child living with my crazy single mum Claire. She’s the best mum ever, except when I used to get in trouble all the time. The police or principal called her before I even got home, so I enter the house to my distressed mothers voice screaming ‘Samantha Jane Moore. Get here right now.’. Although I’ve picked up my act in the past year, stopped getting into trouble, stayed in school every day so I could graduate. And in 6 months I will. Other than my mum’s crazy side, she loves her animals and also her job. She’s a vet and is always on call so we don’t make plans together because she always ends up having to go help some injured animal. I get all my looks from her. I resemble my father in my personality. He died when I was 12, it was hard on my mum and me, but we had each other. That’s what started the whole attitude problem thing and the trouble began.

The bus gets to school with 20 minutes until the first bell signalling home group and then first period. I luckily had a study period first so I wasn’t panicking. I march off the bus last, feeling the cold spring air attack my wet hair and face. I shouldn’t have wet it. I shivered when the bus drove away, stirring up the cold air. I reached into my bag and pulled out my favourite hoodie and slipped it on whilst walking to the table and tree where I was bound to find the group of people I hang out with. I don’t exactly have many friends, except for my closest friend, but she goes to an all-girls private school. I’d head-butt a wall every day if I had to go to that school. I find Kim sitting on the table under the giant Oak tree that the school refuses to cut down.

“Hey Kim.” I say dropping my bag on the ground beside the table and lean against the table.

“Hey Sam, how was your weekend?” She asked, genuinely curious. Kim is the only person at this school who actually does treat me like a friend.

“It was, alright. I was asleep most of it, but I played my first game of soccer in quite a few years.” I say smiling to myself. I hadn’t played soccer since dad died, but playing on the weekend made me happy.

“Oh my god! Are you serious! That’s great. I’m so happy for you.” She was smiling her true smile.

“Thanks! It was pretty great, I had so much.” I replied laughing at her sudden excitement. The conversation seemed to stop here, we never talked a lot, and it was only a few sentences here and there. We felt comfortable in each other’s silence.

*bell rings*

We both head off silently to the hall, where all the seniors go to get their names marked off. I didn’t have to rush because I had a study period first, but I kept pace with Kim, our legs being the same length, just hers match her fiery pace and attitude. Her natural red hair flows in long wavy locks to her lower back, her green eyes starring daggers into people giving her looks. Her lips pull back over her straight, white teeth when she seen me giggling at her. Kim often wears the boldest things, like today, hot pink skinny jeans, black converse and her favourite black t-shirt. You’d think with her light brown skin, nice physique and perfectly spread out freckles she’d be the most popular girl in school. The boys all drool over her but in all the five years that I’ve known her she hasn’t kissed a single guy. I’ve seen her hug guys, but they were all close mates, nothing more. She prefers to keep to herself, after her mum and dad split up, she moved in with her dad, and has been helping him raise her two little brothers, Connor and Mitchell. Darlings they are.

We get to the hall and amongst all the pushing and shoving to get in out of the cold air I notice Kim is staring at me. I chuckle and shake it off nervously. Trying to work out what that was all about. We get inside and head straight to the table that has our roll on it. I find my name and sign myself in, and Kim does the same. We are sorted alphabetically to mark us here and our last names are only a few apart. We go and stand by the door, waiting for the bell signalling first period. Kim had chemistry first and so we went our different ways, I headed towards the library, knowing I could escape from the real world with just the flick of a page. My nerdy little secret is I love reading. I don’t use my study period to study, instead I find a decent book and position myself in the cushions up in the back corner of the library, excluded from the rest of the building. I was there for a good 45 minutes before I felt my phone vibrate in my back pocket. I pull out my white IPhone 4s and slide the unlock bar. Reading the message.

‘Hey sweetie, just checking to make sure you got to school. Mum x’ She always texts me to check up on me.

‘Hey mum, yeah I did. About to finish my study period, pizza for tea? X’ I reply.

‘Yeah sure thing.’ I locked my phone knowing it was pointless to reply. I put back into my pocket as soon as the bell for second rang.

I jumped out of the cushions and put the book on the counter. After I grabbed my bag I walk outside, determined to pay attention in maths today. I headed towards my maths class when a group of 4 or 5 girls blocks my path. I put head down and try to push through them.

‘Excuse me?’ I clear my throat.

“Oh, look what the cat dragged in.” Laughed a high pitch nasally voice. It was the school bitch and bully, Kara.

“Kara I need to get to class.” I mumble feebly trying to push my way through her posse.

“Oh no you don’t!” She grunts, grabbing me by the wrist and flinging me back into the little circle the girls had formed around me. “Oh look at this, someone is a little faggot.” She said grabbing my wrist and turning it facing up so you could see some of the scars. She yanked my jumper sleeve up, revealing the hundreds and thousands of scars on my left arm.

“Don’t!” I protested trying to pull my arm away. She was stronger than she looked so it didn’t really work.

“You can’t tell me what to do.” She hissed, flying her free first smack right into my right eye. It instantly swelled up and I could tell it won’t be pretty for ages. The force of the hit also knocked me onto the hard cement ground, grazing the palms of my hands when I tried to stop myself from falling. I then felt something heavy collide with the side of my head. Next thing I knew I was lying on cold cement with blood trickling down the side of my face and only being able to open one eye. I tried sitting up but instantly felt woozy, after getting knocked out. I gently laid back down on the cement, only to hear the bell ring.

“Shit” I hissed. I had to get up now, or be trampled. So I crawled to a pole holding up the undercover roof beside the library, I pulled myself up and leaned against the pole, wrapping my arms around it to keep me upright. My head was throbbing, and I could feel the blood start running down my face faster and there was more of it. When the some of the kids in my maths class walk past, they all notice me but don’t do anything, they just ignore me and walk off. That’s when I notice Mr Banks, my P.E teacher, just wandering the school grounds as people had their recess break. I wobbled my over to him, when he seen the blood and the wobbliness he rushed over and took me to sick bay. I had to get taken to the hospital in an ambulance on a stretcher, do you know how embarrassing that is. They put 6 stitches in a cut on my forehead, and gave me pain killers to help soothe the headache.

I was told to just start the holidays now because the doctors suggested I stay home and rest, and it was the last week so the teachers agreed I should stay at home. They called my mother and filled her in on the details while a nurse handed me a bag of ice for my eye. I held it up against my eye and fall asleep in the waiting room chair for half an hour before I was shook awake by my mother. She drove me home but had to go back to work so I had the house to myself. I didn’t want to stay cooped up because the sun had come out and it was lunch time. So I went up the hall to the end room, my bedroom and raided my closet until I found my favourite pair of denim short shorts. I put them on instead of jeans but left my hoodie on over my singlet because there was still a slight breeze. I grabbed my converse and went to the bathroom to look at how I looked.

I walked into my bathroom, looked straight into the mirror and almost dropped my phone on the tiled floor. My hair was caked in dried blood, I had blood on my face and neck, and luckily it didn’t get on my jumper. I grabbed a face washer and scrubbed it off my skin, but tenderly wiped it away from the cut on the side of my forehead. I stuck my head in the shower this time and washed hair, removing the dried blood, dirt and leaves. I grabbed a towel and dried my hair before pinning my fringe to the side. My hair had more waves but they were cute so I left it how it was. I walked back into my room, grabbed my sunnies and left. Hoping I could hide my rapidly forming black eye. I was paying more attention to the people giving me stares then where I was going. I found myself outside of McDonalds, I knew I’d pay for this, but I walked inside and bought a cheese burger. On the way to the shopping centre, I passed Starbucks and decided I wanted a nice tea to soothe my worries. I liked using fake names, so I put it under Kevin, knowing that when she called out Kevin, someone, somewhere was screaming ‘KEEVVIIIIIIN.’ I always see girls point at things yelling random shit, it confuses me. Must be some crazy trend. The lady called out Kevin and I reached for my tea and head to the shopping centre. On my way there I noticed there was hundreds, I mean hundreds of girls surrounding something, or someone I should say. I notice five boys have walked onto a stage set up outside the mall. I was still a distance away so I figured if I cross the road I can get past without being hammered by screaming teenage girls. Today is so not the day to go shopping. Since when did famous people visit Morkton, it was a city, but no one ever came here.

I crossed the street when I got to the start of the mall, and idled past, sipping my tea as I went. Hoping to catch a name or a glimpse of someone. I heard some one hand them microphones and then I sat in the sun on the grass across the street at the park. I could still clearly see the five boys, but I wasn’t all “OH MY GOD” about it, I was comfortable where I was.

“Hi everyone. I’m Liam, and we are One Direction!” Claimed the tall broad shouldered boy in the middle of the five. Girls were screaming and going crazy. What’s the big deal?

“This is Louis, Harry..” And then the girls went crazy and I didn’t catch the last two names. The blonde haired boy then suddenly pulled out a guitar from off stage and started playing, the music was a nice soft melody, and I fell in love before I even heard the blonde boy sing. I ran off home before I could listen anymore, I knew that song all too well. It was played at my parents wedding, Stereo Hearts. I refused to listen to any song associated with my dad, it hurt too much. But the way he played that guitar, perfected every note. When I got home my head was thumping and I was out of breathe completely. I suddenly hear Peacock by Katy Perry playing from my pocket and realised I was getting a phone call. I plopped myself down on my bed and answered.

“Hello?”

“Hey Sam, its Liz.” She replied bubbly, Liz is my best friend that goes to the all-girls private school. We look alike, same dark skin, brown hair, dark eyes. Except her hair is cut off at the shoulders and is so uneven. But it looks heaps good. I’m just about 10cm shorter than her.

“Hey there, how have you been?” I say, trying not to come onto the subject of my day.

“I’ve been good. How is your head?” She asks laughing, obviously spotting my plan to avoid it.

“Not funny, it’s fine I promise.” I chuckle.

“Oh crap, head mistress is coming, I’ll see you at the end of the week? Miss you, bye.” She blurts out, I barely manage to catch all the words she spat out.

I chuck my phone onto the soft fluffy carpet beside my bed, I grabbed my doona and pillow off my bed, and also joined my phone of the floor. I plugged my phone into my stereo system and went to the song I wanted to hear so played, Stereo Hearts. I placed it on repeat and sung myself into a well-earned sleep, in the sun on my floor.

#onedfanfic #fanfic #one direction #louis tomlinson #niall horan #zayn malik #harry styles #liam payne #nialler #larry #ziam

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imcrazyboutchoo-blog · 12 years

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Denman Wine and Food Affair. Australia NSW, 2328.

#photography

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imcrazyboutchoo-blog · 12 years

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Went out for tea and looked like a girl for once.

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imcrazyboutchoo-blog · 12 years

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Listen, read, reblog <3 Deep breaths Liam. In and out, you can do this. It’s been ten years already. Just one song and then you can leave, go home and sleep it off. I kept repeating this to myself. The other lads are here for support. I let out a nervous laugh. I shouldn’t be nervous I’ve performed exactly two hundred live shows before, why should this be any different? I knew exactly why this was different, I just didn’t want to admit it.

The arena was pitch black. I stood center stage and I glance to my right, I notice Harry, he gave me an encouraging smile but I could tell he was finding this just as hard as I was. I knew my wife, Danielle, and five year old son James Niall Payne sat in the front row, although, I was unable to see them from the lack of light in the darkened room. My palm became clammy as I grip the microphone tight. I hadn’t noticed I was shaking until I glanced down at my vibrating leg. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. The first note of our song begins to play and the lights flickered, revealing us lined up along the edge. With the stage lights on, the audience became more visible. For a second I stood in awe at the sold out arena. One hundred thousand seats all sold out just to hear us perform one song. Fully aware of this performance being aired live on television I raise my microphone to my mouth. I steady my breathing and prayed to God when I opened it to sing that words would come out. The crowd fell silent anticipating our performance tonight. “Shut the door, turn the light off…” Minor success, the words did come out, at least I hadn’t stuttered, yet. Mindlessly I finish my solo. I heard my voice as I sung, yet I could not feel what I was singing, I felt numb. It was a relief when Harry swooped in with his rocky voice and sung the hook. I join in the chorus with another deep breath. Piling in a group, the lads and I wrapped arms around one another’s shoulders for support. There was a video montage of the X-Factor days, the video diaries, our old video clips and award shows being projected on an enormous screen behind us. I couldn’t bear to turn around and look. As the chorus fades into the next verse I froze, it took everything in me not to throw up. I instantly regret volunteering for this responsibility. “C-close the door.” I stuttered. “Throw the key, don’t want to be reminde-“ I stopped, I couldn’t bring myself to finish, it just wasn’t right, it didn’t sound right. I fall to my knees and let the tears that had formed in my eyes roll down my face. Louis rested his arm on my shoulder and Zayn knelt down to my level. I couldn’t face the crowd so I stared at the stage floor. “Look up,” Zayn whispered in my ear. I raised my head to see the flickering orange flame of one hundred thousand candles light the arena. The crowd was holding them up for respect and to show remembrance. The boys helped me to my feet. “Together,” Harry stated and I nodded. The four of us – Harry, Zayn, Louis and I begin to sing the little Irish mans solo. When the song faded to silence I once again put the microphone to my mouth. “Thank you all for coming tonight, I’m sure you can all imagine how hard this was for us to come out here tonight,” I sniffled. Harry gently patted my back with Louis close at his side and Zayn held my other hand while tried to regain my voice. I could see they were all puffy eyed and red faced.

“This has been our first performance since, the accident, and it is going to be our last,” I stated. The crowd erupts with what sounded like gasps and cries. “We’re sorry to disappoint our fans but we are no longer One Direction, we haven’t been for ten years, without Niall there is and never will be a One Direction. Thank you again for coming, Niall would have been amazed at the turn out.” I rest my microphone on the stand in front of me and exit the stage with my arms intertwined with the other lads. Once we were backstage and off camera I completely lost it. I once again fall to the ground and begin crying. This time the other three wrap their arms around me and begin sobbing too. Tonight was a memorial. Tonight was the first time I had sung since the day of the accident. It had been ten years to the day since we lost our Nialler. I remember ever detail of the night as if it was yesterday. We’d just finished our first world tour we were celebrating the closing show. I had something else I was happy about but I didn’t want to draw the attention away from the bands successes. “Absolutely brilliant lads, just brilliant!” Louis slurred, stumbling from the bar. “One tour down!” Zayn giggled. “And with many more to come!” Niall shouted. “Alright since I’m the sober one tonight I’m driving, keys please Harry,” I held out my hand. “You’re always the sober one,” Harry laughed. “Yeah Mr. I only have one kidney,” Louis mocked me causing everyone to laugh. “Get in the car you idiots,” I rolled my eyes. “Wait,” Niall stopped us. “What?” I turned around confused. “I just want to take a moment to appreciate how far we’ve come, as a band and all that we have accomplished.” Niall ginned from ear to ear. “We did it,” I grinned. The five of us shared a group embrace. “I love you guys,” Niall grinned. “Alright enough of the sappy crap, let’s get you all home,” I laughed unlocking Harry’s Range Rover. Zayn, Liam and Harry piled into the back seat and Niall sat in the passenger seat beside me. I took the usual route back to the complex buildings. “Put your seatbelt on Louis,” Niall stated while we were in stationary position at the traffic lights. “Yes Sir!” Louis saluted Niall and obeyed his command. I shook my head. The traffic light went green and I put my foot down on the accelerator. “Liam look out!” Niall shouted unbuckling his belt and grabbing hold of the steering wheel. The tires screeched, and the car swerved, suddenly there was a bright light, followed by a massive thud. The Range Rover was sent shooting across the intersection and rolled over three times in a summersault motion. I must have blacked out because I woke with my head resting on the steering wheel. I turned around to find Harry, Zayn and Louis in the back seat unconscious. “Boys, wake up!” I yelled. Louis rolled his head forward opening his eyes. “What just happened?” He asked wearily. “We were in an accident, quick check the others,” I said frantically. Louis managed to help Zayn and Harry regain consciousness. I turned to my side. “Niall are you okay?” I asked. My heart sank. Niall was no longer in the passenger seat. I look at the shattered windscreen traced with blood. “Call an ambulance!” I yelled at the others whilst unbuckling my belt.

I raced out of the car and looked around. Since it was the very early hours of the morning the intersection was deserted. I saw the truck that had impacted with our vehicle. My eyes wandered, and then I saw him. Niall. My Niall, lying motionless on road metres from our car. A man whom I later discovered was the truck driver hovered over him. I ran to Niall’s side. “Get away from him!” I yelled at the man. I fell to my knees and took Niall’s head and rested it in my lap. He had a large gash on his forehead and it was dripping with blood. “Niall can you hear me?” I gently tapped his cheeks. “Liam, is that you?” Niall’s eyes opened slightly. “Yes babe, it’s me,” I began to cry. “I can’t feel my body,” He whispered. “Shh Niall, everything is going to be okay,” I tried to soothe him. “I’m not going to make it,” His eyes glaze over. “Don’t talk like that Niall, you will get through this,” I shook him as an attempt to keep his eyes open, “just keep talking to me while we wait for an ambulance.” “Are the others okay? Did Louis put his seatbelt on in time?” Niall coughed. “Yes Niall, you saved him, why did you take your seatbelt off Niall?” I cried loudly. “I saw the truck coming, I needed to save you,” He tilted the corner of his mouth upwards. “You shouldn’t have done that, this is all my fault,” I sobbed. “No!” Niall spat, “you did absolutely nothing wrong, and I don’t want you to live thinking you did!” “Niall don’t,” I cried. “Don’t what?” He said closing his eyes. I tap his cheeks, “don’t say your goodbyes.” “I love you Liam,” He smiled. “Niall you can’t leave me,” I rubbed his cheek gently, “I can hear the sirens of the ambulance now.” “It’s my time,” He nodded. “No Niall you need to hold on,” I let a tear splash on his face. “I can’t,” He whispered. “You have to, who’s going to be my best man?” I asked. “You proposed to Danielle?” His face lit up. “Yes, now you have to pull through this and be my best man,” I wiped away my tears. “Choose Zayn,” He whispered. “No Niall, I want you, you’re my best friend,” I clench my jaw. “I know Zayn will be there for you, so will Harry and Louis, but I think you should choose Zayn,” Niall coughed loudly. “I love you so much Niall, please don’t leave me,” I said letting tears stream down my face again. “Thank you Liam,” Niall smiled. “For what?” I asked confused. “Being the best friend anyone could ever ask for,” Niall’s eyes closed and his body fell limp in my arms. “No, wake up Niall!” I screamed, but it was no use he laid motionless. “No, please no!” I heard Louis’ voice behind me. He had managed to get Harry and Zayn out of the car also. “Please don’t tell me he’s…” Harry trailed off. “He’s gone,” I cried. The rest of the band erupted with tears and heavy wailing.

Ten years ago today, at the tender age of nineteen our baby Nando’s was taken from us. He was my best friend, my brother and now he’s gone. He now lives on in my memories and will never be forgotten. My son will grow up with the name of his uncle, the name of his guardian angel. Niall Horan.

I love you Niall, always have, always will.

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