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iwritekawaiithings · 10 years
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a kawaii monogatari by a kawaii tomodachi
i alSO WANT A STORY
ASK AND YOU SHALL RECEIVE
Long ago in a land far far away there lived a princess who ruled with both an iron fist and admirable fashion sense.
Her name was Sonya, she was beauty, she was grace, she was miss united states, and her people regarded her as the fairest in all the land and this was largely accepted as fact because I mean- come on? Have you seen her? Shit, son. Bruh. Lady is hella fine like Aphrodite herself gotta testify to that shit, dayum.
All was well in Princess Sonya’s kingdom, her people all wore dresses regardless of age and sex and the town ran on currency solely comprised of pizza, fries, and ketchup packets. It was remarkably peaceful, all things considered.
Until ONE DAY when this one asshole decided to live in Sonya’s kingdom and totally ruin her lolita aesthetic and kill her chill vibes.
"Which bitch dARETH to kill mine VIBE?" she proclaimed, throwing open her double doors and dramatically stepping on to her hella cool balcony to address her kingdom, petticoats swaying prettily in the breeze.
"If women are equal to men, then doesn’t that mean I can punch girls now?" a voice uttered from the crowd, and Sonya’s citizens quickly parted around this usurper in disgust, not wanting themselves to be soiled by such literal human trash.
"Who is that spewing such verbal filth onto my clean, eco-friendly streets?" Sonya called, snapping her fingers at her servants to indicate it was time to initiate operation "no flex zone".
"Girls shouldn’t wear too much make-up!" The voice cried out, and Sonya finally zeroed in on the shit stain.
There stood a man with scraggly hair in desperate need of a trim, he appeared to be perpetually sweaty and looked like someone who would ask “don’t I get a hug?” every time a female who he knew tried to leave without touching him.
Sonya immediately recognized him as a prince from a far way kingdom she had once thought to be a fine ruler, until she realized men are kinda lame for the most part and not near as important as society had led her to believe.
Sonya rolled her eyes before calling out to the washed up prince, “Dead men don’t cat call!” And with that code her servants immediately sprung into action - showering the sad little man in so much glitter he decomposed into a puff of sparkle and was flown off to the distant sea that laid beyond the reaches of what was known of the Earth.
"All he are is dust in the wind." Sonya whispered with a solemn nod, before swishing back into her castle to enjoy a day of playing the Sims and color-coordinating her wig collection.
THE END
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iwritekawaiithings · 10 years
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KAWAII KAWAII KAWAII KAWAII KAWAII KAWAII
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KAWAII KAWAII KAWAII KAWAII KAWAII KAWAII
KAWAII KAWAII KAWAII KAWAII KAWAII KAWAII
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iwritekawaiithings · 10 years
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For Kelsey-chan ♥
Mukashimukashi, there lived a totemo kawaii onna no hito named Kerushi.She was known by everyone as Kerushi-senpai, even by people who were chotto older than her because Kerushi was just that sugoi.
Kerushi was so sugoi, in fact, that one day, kami-sama floated down from heaven to grant her great chikara. "Kerushi-senpai," said kami-sama, "You are just so sugoi, I have to give you some hounto ni sugoi mahou powers." With a wave of his te, kami-sama created the greatest mahou shoujo ever: Kerushi-senpai-sama-chan.
Kerushi-senpai-sama-chan began life anew the next day when she awoke to kireina pinku kami atop her atama because that's just how it works when you're a sugoku mahou shoujo like Kerushi-senpai-sama-chan. Not long after woke from her slumber, Kerushi-senpai-sama-chan heard a great crash outside her mado! When she looked outside her mado, she saw a huge, awful beast! "kisAMA" she roared as she leapt through her mado to the ground below.
As Kerushi-senpai-sama-chan landed, she found herself kao to kao with none other than Bakabakashii Kurisuchan, the worst villain of all!! After doing a sugoku kawaii mahou shoujo transformation, Kerushi-senpai-sama-chan got into her kakkoi attack stance. "Kawaii enpitsu stab attack!" she yelled, aiming at the horrible beast's crazy hige. Shikashi, her kawaii enpitsu wand got stuck in the tangled, ugly mess!
Luckily, Kerushi-senpai-sama-chan had one more attack up her sleeve: "Abunai kami death attack!" Our of her literal sleeve she launched a giant sheet of kami big enough to cover Bakabakashii Kurisuchan's entire karada. Slowly, but hilariously, the villain was smothered by the abunai kami death attack and suffocated to death.
That, kodomo, is the monogatari of Kerushi-senpai-sama-chan's first, and most suteki, victory.
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iwritekawaiithings · 11 years
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For my sensei.♥
My sensei does not have a Tumblr, which is probably a good thing, but I shall write a lovely story about him anyway because anyone who has had him will hopefully be amused. <3
Yet another stressful day was ahead for the overworked sensei, but he looked forward to seeing the young faces of all of his genki students, especially his suteki AP students. They were all just so smart, even though they were super weird kids. But that was why he loved them, of course.
He felt he was fully prepared for his day, and he made it through mostly daijoubu. But THEN--
"Hatarakichuudoku-sensei, I don't wakaru something in your textbook. Tesudate-kudasai!"
Being the yasashii guy he was, Hatarakichuudoku-sensei said, "Mochiron!" and bounced over to his ichinensei quickly, nearly losing the sangurasu atop his head in the process. "What's on your maindo?" he asked.
"Well, I was just wondering, what's a copula?"
And all of a sudden, the sensei's brain began an all too familiar meltdown. That word, it had been causing such a deep pain in his kokoro for so many years. "Let me just tell you about this copula business! Only gopun, I swear!"
Before the innocent seito-tachi knew what was happening, the sensei was off on a terribly long rant, the likes of which they had never seen! Before sensei realized it, the bell for class to end rang, and all of his ichinensei were scurrying out the door from his mecha kowai wrath.
Hatarakichuudoku-sensei slumped down into the chair behind his desk with a sigh. "Tomorrow, I'll teach them the te-form song for real this time! HONTOU NI!"
The end. ♥
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iwritekawaiithings · 11 years
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For young Tucker. ♥
This is the second one I've written for my Tucker, because I love him and the first one didn't get posted here. <3
"All of these exams are hontou ni stressing me out!" young Tuck-san murmured to himself as he glowered at his nihongo textbook. "How am I supposed to remember all of these kanji? Man, sensei is being such a baka!" he exclaimed. Really, how was he supposed to memorize 100 kanji in less than two weeks and actuallyknowwhat all of them meant? It was impossibru! After he did much deep thinking, young Tuck-san decided to talk to his sensei.
"Konnichiwa~" Tuck-san called as he opened the door to his nihongo classroom. "Konnichiwa, Tuck-kun!" his sensei replied. "Genki?"
"Actually, sensei, I'm not genki at all," Tuck-san replied sadly. "I just don't think I can remember all of these kanji for our exam!"
Tuck-san's sensei nodded slowly. "I know that this is a difficult time for you, Tuck-san. But you have to wakaru my position here," he said. "It's myjobto teach you all of the muzukashii kanji, and I know it's hard. But, Tuck-kun, I know that you are sugoi, and if you ganbatte, you're atama will be even more ii than it already is."
Carrying his sensei's words deep in his kokoro, Tuck-san ganbatte'd with all his might and benkyou'd all day, every day, until he could nail every kanji without a second thought. Because of his sensei's wisdom and the fact that he ganbatte'd with all his might, young Tuck-san got the highest score in his class, and his luck continued to be this way itsumo.
The end. <3
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iwritekawaiithings · 11 years
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For Neko-chan. ♥
Here you go, kouhai. <3
Once upon a time, there was a very utsukushii young onna named Neko-chan. Neko-chan was a totemo intelligent young lady, and she was good at many things like music and artsu.
She was especially fond of artsu, and it showed. She was very jouzu at artsu, and many people admired her kirei drawings.
One day, little Neko-chan was feeling very lonely, and so she drew herself a hansamu prince. "Oh, how I wish my hansamu prince could come to life. It would make me so genki!" But she knew that this could never be so, and that night she went to bad with a heavy sadness in her kokoro.
Little did Neko-chan know, however, was that her hansamu prince had heard her wishu! Even though he was inside her sketchbook, Neko-chan had drawn him with so much ai that as she slept, he had come to life!
The next morning, Neko-chan awoke, and much to her surprise, she found the hansamu prince she had drawn the day before standing before her, alive as could be! "Oh, prince-senpai, you are so kakkoii! Please, will you stay with me itsumo?" she asked. The hansamu prince approached her, and haggu'd her tightly. "Mochiron!" he said, "I will stay by your side itsumo, Neko-chan! Aishiteru yo!"
And so, the hansamu prince became Neko-chan's hasbando, and she his waifu, and they lived happily together itsumo.
The end. <3
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iwritekawaiithings · 11 years
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Why, hello there. ;D
Sometimes, Chie feels like writing.
Especially when it's almost winter break and she has time for such things.
So I think I shall write things here.
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