Listen, I know I’m not a big ‘people person’ but I’m telling you I am also not a ‘me’ person at all.
My self-perception is not doing well, thank you very much. Two or three nights ago I accidentally stayed up til 3AM (which I never do voluntarily because I love sleep) because I was too sad to do anything but listen to music and my thoughts. It’s bad. These days I can no longer do anything without listening to music or watching a show or movie. I need to get out of my head.
Today I might try wearing my binder even though I will be at home the whole day. I expect it to go bad because I’ve been gaining some weight recently and if you’re a binder-wearer like me, then you know gaining weight (even a little) is a big deal (unless maybe you’re very thin?). I don’t know. I can just take it off if it makes the dysphoria even worse. I hate this.
I don’t know what else to talk about because the world is in literal chaos right now. The government is still shit. I miss hanging out with my friends. I miss walking outside. I haven’t been exercising.