little-red-88

[little-red-88]

every 1 is honestly beautiful and tragic like sometimes i can't look people in the eye because im like i know something is making you deeply irreversibly sad and you're just here talking to me about the weather and im going to let you

[little-red-88]

Agdgsgsgsg I’m LIVING for this Reef2Reef thread. This guy was worried about his urchins getting sunburnt so he made them little hats

[little-red-88]

An emotional dump.

In my 21 years of life I had never been in love, not that it had ever bothered me cause quite frankly I have never been one to day dream of being `in love’ nor one to chase after romantic relationships however not long back I met this guy... in a video game, yeah I know not the most iconic of meet cute’s but ehhh. it was an instant click, we seemed to fit as if it were meant to be and don’t get me wrong it was hella fuckin weird but for real just soo compatible. Over a couple of months we just got to know each other, flirting and playing games together and it was wonderful. I had never felt this feeling before this heavy longing... him slipping into my thoughts without me even realising and all was swell. but he had problems, where I was bubbly and positive, he was negative and self destructive and this all built up until I just couldn’t sit by and watch as he destroyed himself and I cut off any romantic ties we had. it was okay for awhile after but then today his snap chat had a picture of him in bed with a woman and though I have absolutely no! right to be hurt, I feel as though some one is twisting my heart in my chest but only enough for me to suffer. I’ve thought about sending a reply message but at the same time I don’t think he would even give 2 shits and that most definitely is the worst part. I am aware that this will pass and become another lost lover in my memories but not my heart and I long for the day that this no longer hurts, but till then i’m gonna work my self senseless working towards my goals, the very thing I should be focusing on.... or at least i’ll try! ^-^

#lost love #pain #moving on #personal shit #shitpost

[little-red-88]

So for the past week I’ve been learning the art of... well Pixel art.

 From what started out as a joke with my bro in-law about designing a game based entirely on Australia and its sometimes (most times) weird or outlandish culture, to him looking me all serious like and say ‘why not just actually make it, it’d be hilarious’.

So i’m looking into it for the fun of it and that’s where the art comes in, I am taking any requests or challenges thrown my way and will try my best! 

(all above are challenges from my family and my progress over a week)

#pixel art #learning #art #noob artist

[little-red-88]

“According to the Oxford English Dictionary, the term pansexual has been around since at least the early 1900s as a psychological term that describes sex as a primary motivator for human beings. Its current definition has been around since at least the late 1960s. The idea of sexual attraction that isn’t limited to binary constructions of gender is not new — it’s just that more and more people believe it to be possible and positive.”

— Pansexuality 101: 5 Key Facts You Need to Know | via them 

[little-red-88]

the buzzfeed unsolved drinking game

ok so katie (@vermillionreasons ) and I made this drinking game up ages ago for @buzzfeed  unsolved and I figured we should share the wonder with the world! enjoy!

note: I recommend not doing this with shots and instead do it with long drinks bc you end up drinking a lot

ok so drink once when:

“wheeze” (of course)

shane taking the mick out of anyone

creepy police sketch/those weird silhouette things/creepy graphics

swearing

jump scares

ryan says “no this is real” or something close

going on location

when shane does a weird accent (drink 2x if ryan does it)

someone writes a letter to a newspaper (try not to die in the zodiac episode if you do shots)

odd rules:

drink the same number as the # of the theory (theory 1: 1 sip/shot, theory 4: 4 sips/shots)

if no theories: drink for the suspects

if “mumbles” shows up, down your drink

[little-red-88]

you risk tears when you let yourself be tamed

Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

#the little prince

[little-red-88]

(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6aCvzLfSLw)

#dontletgo

[little-red-88]

Throwback to my hella gay personal photoshoot 😂

[little-red-88]

Ahh I love this!

Sibkid

Last night, I brought up to a couple friends how a pronoun is needed for my sisters child. I was perplexed on referring to Cruz, when speaking about their brilliant mind. Julian, a total angel with a quick mind calmly said, “Sibkid? Since its your siblings kid, makes sense.” WHAT A GOOD FUCKIN TERM! Just wanted to share!

[little-red-88]

[little-red-88]

The tears won't stop falling!

What happens once you kill yourself? Because I'm ready to go.

You wanna know what happens once you kill yourself? Your mother comes home from work and finds her baby dead and she screams and runs over to you and tries to get you to wake up but you won’t and she keeps screaming and shaking you and her tears are dripping onto your face and your dad hears all the screaming and runs into the room and he can’t even speak because the child that he loved and the child that he watched grow up is gone forever and finally your little sister runs into the room to see what all the fuss is about and she sees you dead. The person she looked up to and loved. The person she bragged about to  her friends, the person she wanted to be just like when she grew up, the person that made her feel safe. But she’s never really going to get to grow up and smile and laugh and love because she’ll always be consumed with this feeling of missing you. And now there’s something missing from your family and they can barely look at each other anymore because everything reminds them of you but you’re gone and hurts more than anything. and you think that your mom never cared because she was always busy and yelling at you to finish your homework and clean your room and forgot to say I love you sometimes but really, she loved you more than anything and she doesn’t leave the house anymore, she can’t even get out of bed and she’s getting thinner and thinner because it’s too hard to eat. Your father had to quit his job and he doesn’t sleep anymore, every time he closes his eyes he sees his baby dead, and the image never goes away no matter how much alcohol he drinks. And at school your best friend sees that your seat is empty and she gets this sick feeling in her stomach and that’s when she hears the announcement. You killed yourself. And suddenly she’s screaming and crying in the middle of class and no one even bothers comforting because they’re all  busy sitting there staring at your empty seat with tears dripping down their cheeks and all she wants is for you to hug her and tell her it’s gonna be okay like you always did, but this time, you’re not there to do it, everything is dark now that you’re gone and her grades are slipping, she barely goes to school anymore and she ended up in hospital after taking too many pills because she wanted to see you again. the girls who used to make fun of the way you dressed feel their throats get tight, they don’t talk to each other anymore, they don’t talk to anyone, they’re all in therapy trying so hard not to blame themselves but nothing works. and your teacher who always gave you a hard time stares blankly at the wall, she quits her job a few days later. And then your boyfriend hears the news and he can’t breathe, he still calls you a lot just to hear your voice and he talks to you on facebook but you never message him back, he can’t fall in love again because every girl he meets reminds him of you, he’s never going to get over you, he loved you and he cries himself to sleep every night, hating himself and slicing his skin because he couldn’t save you and he’s never going to hold you in his arms or hear you laugh again. Now everyone who knew you, whether they were a big part of your life or someone you passed in the hallway a few times a week, they carry this aching feeling around inside them because you’re gone, and they miss you, and they don’t know why you left but it must’ve been their fault and they should’ve stopped you and they should’ve told you they loved you more and that feeling is never going to go away. And so you killed yourself

but you killed everyone else around you too. 

[little-red-88]

So I came to the realisation I didn't have any fem photos up so here's one in cosplay and one in my fav onsie.

[little-red-88]

So a few shots of my hair cut and froyo ヾ(*´∀｀*)ﾉ

[little-red-88]

Next step

So I just bought my first binder today and I can wait for it to arrive. It’ll be my next big step after I got my hair cut last week.

#excited

[little-red-88]

Forever a Place

When we first met we learned that we shared the same birthday though you were older by 4 hours, my first thought of you was that you had the kinda smile that could light up a room. over many late night conversations and dorky inside jokes i could feel my self growing a crush on you, but i was overly shy and awkward so i never said anything. She had a petite figure, long black hair and a grace like no other, she was one of my closest friends so when she told me she liked you i prepared to give up. Then you asked me out on a date and i felt as if i had used up enough luck for a life time. The date was great but my anxiety made it hard for both of us, i couldn’t even give you a hug. After that a lot happened my anxiety got worse and depression from family circumstances made it hard for me to even keep living let alone have a relation ship. so i told you i was struggling and we broke up. My heart not once strayed, for you were all it could see, it took me a few months to regain myself and be some what whole again. It took but a week for us to go back to being friends again but your bright smile was no longer pointed in my direction. It hurt but i was happy for you and her. After awhile i decided to try to move on and i met him he took all my first bar (one my first love), and it was one night after making love with him i realized my heart wasn’t with him, that i had been lying to my self, just pretending to have moved on so i would feel less lonely. That was the time you started to push me away, no longer were we close friends. I started growing closer to him and slowly pushed you into a smaller and smaller place in my heart, until that cold winter night when she broke up with you. She told my that she never felt your love, and you told me that you missed her already. My studies and home life got hard to deal with and i started crashing again, i wasn't going to take him down with me so i told him i was moving and he broke up with me. when i think of him i feel guilt because i never loved him the way he loved me. I moved and we stopped talking you and I.

Every guy that's showed interest in me since, i have compared them all to you and not a single one has ever gotten close you and i don't think anyone ever will.

We saw each other a month ago and said our polite greetings, you had grown taller and more built, even your messy blond hair had grown. when you caught my gaze my breath caught in my throat and for a moment in time it felt as if we were alone in the universe but alas we weren't. The moment was short, bitter-sweetly so.

They say you never forget your first love, that they will forever hold a place in your heart. but instead of a place if feels as if you have claimed the whole of it.

You sent me a message yesterday and we once again began talking like we had many a times before, I wish I had the strength to tell you to leave me be so I can forget you or at least try but given just the slightest bit of hope and my heart wont have a bar of what the logical side of my brain is telling me.

To the man who has made Carry On by Fun heart breaking for me, because you told me it made you think of me and now it makes me think of you.

To the man who’s smile could make my day in a matter of seconds.

To the man who I am forced to think about on our birthday every single year.

To the man who changed my world forever.

To the man who was my first love.

You truly will forever hold a place in my heart and should you ever offer me your heart again I would take it in a heart beat and never let it go this time.

#firstlove #late night drabbles #i need chocolate

[little-red-88]

Dreams bring hopes and hopes life and the day you stop dreaming you will be a dead man living

Deepak Kumar Pattanayak