london-riker

[london-riker]

Thanks to everyone who messaged me to say happy birthday! I hope you’re all doing well.

[london-riker]

OOC update.

Hey, everyone. I just wanted to check in and let you all know that I’m doing much better these days. Thank you to everyone who has helped me this past year, both financially and emotionally. This is also a gentle apology for both my distance and my lack of checking in. I still care about each of you very much. My life is back on track, I’ve climbed out of the hole I was trapped in, and you were all right: things did get better. I’m looking forward to 2020. Hope you’re all good. Feel free to reply with an update, or tell me how your day is going, or just say hi. I miss my WoW Tumblr fam. PS: redhead again. Peace & love. ♥️

#ooc #update #not a mess anymore? #mun

[london-riker]

“Our poor little village is dead.

All the people have gone stiff or fled.

There is no more noise…

…except me and my toys…

…just like all the dark birdies said!”

[london-riker]

Since this is an OOC blog now I may as well post selfies.

#ooc #mun #me

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I feel happy and confident for the first time in years, so I’m going to share it with you guys.

#ooc #mun #me #irl

[london-riker]

I need to get this off my chest.

Hi there, Rockstars

Some of you may remember me as the person who played the tattoo artist and “punk rock scientist,” London Riker. Some of you may have noticed that I’ve fallen off, and completely stopped writing these last few months.

There’s a reason for that.

All my life, like most of us, I have struggled with depression. I’ve played WoW since I was 9 years old (I’m now 23), and I’ve been roleplaying since I was about 11. Most of that time, again like most of us, I used RP as an escape from the shit show that was my real life.

I can’t do that anymore.

World of Warcraft, for me, was a scapegoat. I used WoW as an escape instead of actually escaping. I used roleplay relationships as a coping mechanism to put a band-aid on my very real (failing) relationships. Damn, that part hurts to admit. I used my character for attention, because she was cool, and fun, and witty, and she wasn’t insecure like me.

WoW quickly became an excuse. An excuse for why I couldn’t go out with friends. An excuse for why I didn’t need to cope. “At least I’m not on drugs,” I’d tell myself. “At least I’m not an addict.” But I was wrong. I was addicted. I was addicted to the feeling of a make-believe world, with made up problems, where I didn’t have to be myself, and nothing there could hurt me.

I know that not everyone who plays has a problem. That’s not what I’m trying to say. But for me, WoW - and by the same thread, RP - was destructive. I feel sober now, for the first time in a long time. I feel like I cut something toxic out of my life, and I’m actually proud of myself.

It certainly wasn’t easy. In order to give up my muses, I had to step back and face my real-life issues. I broke up with an ex who did not treat me very well. I met someone in real life, not on WoW, for the first time, and started a new relationship. I focused more on work and got a promotion. And most importantly, I was forced to work on myself, and on my own toxic traits.

But here’s the kicker.

I feel guilty. I am sad, and broken hearted, and forlorn, all at once. Why? Because in leaving RP, I inadvertently damaged my friendship with some of the best friends I have ever had. I started ghosting. I stopped replying to posts, and soon enough, discord texts all together. This wasn’t because of the people themselves, but because they were associated with what I needed to get rid of: my escape. My scapegoat.

My drug.

This is a public apology to @marxsus-emerick, and to all the other wonderful friends and writers I met while I was playing London. This is an apology to all the people I said I’d write with, and never got around to it. The truth is, I was afraid to dive in deeper. I was afraid to play the game, because my real life was in shambles, and I knew that if I played, I would try to compensate and replace my life with London’s.

Here’s the good news: I’m doing better now. My depression isn’t so deep and dark anymore. I’m in a really happy relationship and being treated well. I have a good social life, I’m working hard, and I’m considering going back to school. These are all things that never would have happened had I just dove back into the game when I was at rock bottom.

Maybe someday I’ll try to write again. I’m grateful for the people I’ve met, and the places I’ve gone, all because my dad got me hooked on WoW, and because my creative soul was drawn to RP. I still have an immense love for this craft and its community. As of right now - at least publicly - London and all of my other muses are officially retired. I might still try to pick up some stories I want to save in private.

Thank you all for the care and support you’ve shown me. I can’t believe this account has so many followers, and that my character was received so well. I can’t say thank you enough for the joy this platform brought me when I needed it the most. I’m sorry that I left you all without answers.

I’m sorry I didn’t say this sooner.

Love, Nicole

#ooc #long #apology #rp #wow

[london-riker]

Send 📖 to get really bad advice from my muse

Bonus points for also giving a topic.

[london-riker]

Send “Lawd” if your muse finds mine attractive.

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WORLD OF WARCRAFT (November 23, 2004 – )

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Outfit Headcanons

Send a symbol below and I’ll describe or draw what my Muse wears in specific scenarios!

♔ -  pajamas / bedtime outfit ♕ - beach / swimsuit ♖ - spring outfit ♗ - summer outfit ♘- fall outfit ♟- winter outfit ♙ - date night ♚ - casual / everyday ♛ - formal outfit ♜ - gym / exercise / training outfit ♝- crisis / war / battle armor ☠ - Everyday Going-To-School uniform ☮ - Work Uniform ☯ - Outfit They Wore When They Were 8 ♠ - Clothes they wear when they just don’t care Ω -  Going-To-A-Party Outfit ♤ -  Look-At-Me-I’m-Hella-Attractive Outfit ♣ -   Lingerie / Underwear / Smallclothes ♧ -   An outfit they wear related to one of their hobbies ♥ -   A “traditional” outfit based on their heritage (i.e. kimono, sari, other folk costumes) ♡ -  Superhero / Super Villain costume ♦ -  Magical Girl / Magical Knight costume ♢ -  FINAL BOSS Armor ♞ - you specify another situation!

[london-riker]

I really miss RP.

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Reblog if you’re bisexual, support bisexual people or are actually a bunch of tiny velociraptors in a human suit

[london-riker]

anonymously send me a song to listen to.

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remember kids: rats are the capri sun of the vampire world

[london-riker]

🐾

[london-riker]

[london-riker]

hands up for the “I don’t like RPing on tumblr but here’s my discord” club \o/