outherlyomniaspec

[outherlyomniaspec]

apothiplatonics are fucking cool!!!! you get forgotten about/overlooked too much you deserve the best

[outherlyomniaspec]

Just read an article that used the abbreviation ‘msm’ for ‘men who have sex with men’ and I think it’s something we could really utilise within the aromantic and aspec communities.

eg) XLX - loving

wlw/ mlm/ nblw/ nblm/ nblnb/ wlm etc.

eg) XSX - having sex

wsw/ msm/ nbsm/ nbsw/ nbsnb/ wsm etc.

eg) XRX - in a relationship (you can define this however you want: romantic, sexual, neither, both, queerplatonic, other, unlabelled etc)

wrw/ mrm/ nbrm/ nbrw/ nbrnb/ wrm etc.

like this could be such a useful tool for easily differentiating experiences within informational communication!!

[outherlyomniaspec]

Hi, ironically, I'm Platonic. Main blog @pplatonic - all pronouns

This is my sideblog where I explore my aplatonicism, particularily from a non-SAM perspective. I felt disillusioned with the aromantic and asexual communities, so I decided to be 'just aplatonic.'

Aplatonicism is by far the most accurate and most encompassing aspect of my a-spec identity; I view all of my attractions and lack thereof through the lens of friendship and the associated interactions.

I also use the Loveless and Heartless microlabels.

[outherlyomniaspec]

No, being in a romantic relationship as an arospec does not make me a ✨ hypocrite ✨

This is a reminder that aromanticism is a spectrum, and that some aros experience romantic attraction, albeit differently or more weakly than alloromantics.

You can understand (and feel) the oppression that amatonormativity causes whilst still being romantically involved with someone. Those two things can coexist.

#Aros can also desire romantic relationships without feeling any attraction #or feeling romantic-adjacent attractions and/or desire romantic-adjacent relationships #also amatonormativity also affects polyamorous people #many of whom are alloromantic #so the idea that you can't understand how bad amatonormativity is if you aren't suptillic aromantic and romance-repulsed is ridiculous #It's in itself a romo-negative idea #romance- negativity is not only not necessary but also counterproductive to the fight against amatonormativity

[outherlyomniaspec]

Asensual Asexual Pride Flag

Asexual: experiencing little to no sexual attraction;

Asensual: feeling little to no sensual attraction.

#asexual #asensual #asensual asexual #me

[outherlyomniaspec]

Asensual Aromantic Pride Flag

Aromantic or aro: feeling little to no romantic attraction.

Asensual: experiencing little to no sensual attraction.

#asensual #aromantic #Asensual aromantic #me

[outherlyomniaspec]

Are you...

Edit: Accidentally put gender instead of orientation again, sorry about that

Omniaspec (or omnaspec) is a descriptor for when one's orientation is a-spec for every type of attraction, including those beyond romantic or sexual attraction such as aesthetic or platonic attraction.

#idk. Am I (user outherlyomniaspec) omniaspec? #sure am

[outherlyomniaspec]

sometimes I cant tell if anon asks are aplphobic or not bc idk if they are assuming negative things about aplatonicism

[outherlyomniaspec]

I've just seen a post and I know it's just supposed to be a joke but not all aroaces experience platonic attraction in a normal way if at all. Platonic attraction isn't the default attraction that "replaces" romantic and sexual attraction and it's platnormative (spelling?) to suggest otherwise. To suggest that there even needs to be an attraction that makes up for being aroace is aphobic and amatonormative. I know it's just a joke but hidden under it is the assumption that platonic attraction is the default nost important attraction for aroaces

#apl #aspec #aro #ace #aroace #platonormativity #amatonormativity

[outherlyomniaspec]

I'm the kind of 'doesn't give a shit about nonrose relationships' person (bc I'm atertiary and repulsed by these relationships and have opted out of them!!) that allotertiary aspecs hate tbh... And I know they probably don't intend to be aphobic with this but it is literally aphobic towards atertiary people if you think not liking nonrose relationships is inherently evil.

You're allowed to be upset if people aren't valuing you in the nonrose ways you want them to, and you should ask them for what you want in your interactions(drops my 'communicate or break up' advice as an atertiary I guess) . But please don't malign people like me just bc we can't care about people in tertiary/nonrose ways, while you complain about this.

Just a reminder that, by the way, an allorose atertiary person or apl, afamilial, etc. person is just as aspec as you and belongs in the aspec community if they wish to. I'm just adding this because I see some of you acting like things like family or friendship are not seen as necessary and are not enforced as something everyone should have, even if in some places these may not be the most 'superior' relationship to society(reminder that some of us do live in places where friendship or family are seen as more required than romance though).

Even if larger society does not always conceptualise these as attraction, you cannot deny that people are expected to have meaningful interpersonal connections that are not romantic or sexual (see for example how people are expected to raise a family, have friends, etc.) . And besides, its not like people conceptualised of the concept of romantic attraction before the aspec community started talking about it. However, it is understood that romance was still expected of people back then. And its similar with nonrose / tertiary relationships and attractions.

Some exclusionists literally go out of their way to say that they think aros and aces are valid but think atertiary spectrum labels are bullshit. Don't think it benefits you to agree with them or to exclude atertiary people from the aspec community. Aspec includes atertiary and agender spectrums as well, not just aro and ace spectrums, so please actually meaningfully include us in aspec things.

[outherlyomniaspec]

If i see another "BUT LOVE DOESNT HAVE TO BE ROMANTIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" on a loveless persons post when their post didnt even fucking mention romance or imply that they were only talking about romantic love im gonna become the fucking joker

[outherlyomniaspec]

The 5 common questions people have about aplatonics

so, I've seen so many blogs on the aplatonic tag having to answer the same questions over and over again, so I figured I could make a list so that people can have an easier time getting to the answers they are looking for! (and apl people can just link back to this post if they're asked one of this questions, if they want to)

What does aplatonic mean?

Aplatonic is a term that refers to the lack of (or experiencing little) platonic attraction or platonic love, it can also mean having trouble forming platonic relationships due to trauma or being neurodivergent.

2. Does that mean aplatonic people don't have friends?

Not necessarily, there are aplatonic people who don't (desire to) have friends or wouldn't label any relationship they have as friendship (even though, to an outsider, some would seem as one), for numbers of reasons.

However, there are some aplatonic people who do have friends, but they're not really close to them/don't feel love for them.

love and care are different things, you can care for someone and want the best for them even when you're not close enough to them to love them.

3. But if aplatonic people don't have friends, does that mean they don't socialize with anyone?

Nope! friendships aren't the only way you can socialize with people. Family, classmates, coworkers, lovers, neighbors, those are all people you have have nice conversations with!

4. Are all aplatonics also aromantic?

Not all of them, while it's true that there are a lot of people who are both aro and apl (see: me), there are aplatonics who are alloromantic (feel romantic attraction) or just don't label their romantic orientation.

(fun fact, the original coiner of the aplatonic label is an alloromantic asexual!)

5. Are all aplatonics also loveless?

Again, not all of them, there is a great overlap between the aplatonic and loveless community (shout out to my loveless apls!), but not all aplatonics identify as loveless.

Some love in a romantic way, familiar way, alterous way (if you don't know what alterous attraction is, I recommend looking it up!) or just in a completely unique but ultimately queer way (hi, it's me, I'm lovequeer).

I still don't really get it...

That's okay, you don't have to understand something to respect it, if you're still curious and want to learn more about us, there are multiple blogs on the #aplatonic tag sharing their different experiences with aplatonicism, you just have to know where to look!

And remember! the Aspec includes the aplatonic spectrum, you can't say you support aspecs if you don't support aplatonic people as well!

[outherlyomniaspec]

Truly experiencing the opposite of a gay panic, the aro/ace dread, when I think somebody has a crush on me

[outherlyomniaspec]

Hey, aros, aces, apls, any a-spec! I love you! You are loved! You aren’t wrong for not feeling those emotions! You’re perfect!!!

[outherlyomniaspec]

Stop being platonormative in your 'how to know if you're aro' posts challenge

[outherlyomniaspec]

For fuck's sake I wish people would even think about making characters aspec in ways that arent just asexual!

[outherlyomniaspec]

I wish more things in the aroacespec tags were tagged as alloplatonic or were mentioned to be an alloplatonic perspective bc there's nothing more irksome than looking for arospec posts for myself or acespec posts to use/send to other people and all of it is super allopl while being treated as the foundational experience. Half of aroacespec positivity is coated in platonic love and attraction. Apls deserve recognition of their experiences too without being told we're complaining or being expected to accept that we won't be accepted.