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*Regulus teaching Harry what Easter is*
Regulus: then three days after Jesus died, all the rabbits and little chickens came and ate his corpse
*James and Harry both nodding along*
Remus: that’s not even remotely correct
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Diversity win! Local cannibal has a bisexual tattoo!
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You can also find me here where soon I’ll be uploading some fandom based content 🖤
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Chapter One
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REGULUS’ POV
Another argument between James Potter and Severus Snape, of course, led us all to the bathroom. I'd only followed to monitor my brother, Sirius, who now stands in the middle of all of us. I stay on the sidelines. Barty Crouch Jr blocks the door, but he doesn't do a good job. Unfortunately, none of us realized how terrible of a job he was doing until a girl catches our attention, barging her way into our affairs.
"Where is he?!" We hear the girl yell, causing Barty to spin around.
"Never you mind-" Barty tries, but fails.
She shoves her way past him and marches in, I normally wouldn't think twice, except that she's now in the boys room. I know exactly who she is, Nyx Crowley, the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen. She's the princess of Slytherin, and cunning enough to destroy the entire world. Ive heard horrid stories of her family, and all rumors lead to a dreadful accusation that she may be more vile than the dark lord himself. A monster, the public calls her, along with every other Crowley. Her elder brother attended Hogwarts, but he never graduated, joining the dark arts instead...just like their father. I would ask her personally, but I've never spoke to her, though we've both been in House Slytherin since first year, ironically we arrived the same year. She keeps an odd assortment of friends, refusing to be linked to too many purebloods, I assume to rebel against her own bloodline. She is however known to mock anyone that isn't a pureblood, contradicting herself. She usually remains quiet and reserved, though now is a different story.
"Hey, you can't be in here" Barty argues with her.
"Shut up!" She spits, marching her way to us. She shoves James backwards and pushes Severus behind her, staring up at James. "Are you all right, Severus?" She questions, not being bothered to look at him.
"Listen here, little girl-" James began.
"No you listen, Pottah!" She spits, emphasizing the P. "The best thing you can do is grab your books and return to class"
"You really need a little girl defending you?" He smirks at Severus.
"Don't speak to him" she demands, earning James's attention. "This is now between you and me. Severus, go to class"
"I can't just leave you in here alone with them" he worries. "You're outnumbered"
"Oh, it's them you should worry about. Go on"
"My wand, he has my wand"
"I'll retrieve that"
"As you wish" he sighs, reluctantly leaving. He gave Sirius a look, and Sirius gave him a subtle nod, I assume to let him know she'll be all right. The moment he left, she swings at James, but Barty grips her arms and holds her back. I feel my body tense in concern for her.
"Listen to me-" James begins.
"Did I say you could speak?" She scoffs at him, tugging at her arms. "Now I understand it's hard for you to see someone actually capable of using talent for achieving all that was handed to you, and you're scared because he's better than you, but how dare you stoop so low as to pick on someone"
"Me stoop low? That's rich, coming from a Crowley. Did you think we'd forget what your traitor brother did?"
"He's still better than you"
"He burned half this school"
"At least he didn't torture innocent students daily"
"Stop meddling in our business"
"The next time you go after him, I'll bloody your nose. Understand?"
"Why don't you do it now then? Unless your scared"
"A Crowley scared of some filthy little Potter?! Don't be so stupid"
"You can't fight a girl" Sirius says. "Leave it be"
"No, she's so brave, let her do something"
"You don't want me to do something" she stares at him.
"Let her go, let's all move on before something happens that we can't repair" Sirius tries. Barty agrees, letting go of her arms.
"Wait until Lily hears about this" she spits.
She starts to walk away when James grips her wrist, jerking her back to him. I step closer, refusing to let him fight her. She shoves him back, but he grips her collar and pulls her closer. I grip his wrist, placing a hand on her back in case he shoves her.
"Let her go" I stare.
"Regulus-" he began.
"I said to remove your hand from her" I demand.
He stares at me for a moment before letting her go. I let go of him and wrap my arm around her to walk her out. The moment we reached the corridor, she rips herself from my touch.
"The next time your hands find their way to me, will be the very last time that you have hands. Is that clear?" She snarls at me.
"Very" I sigh, clearly she isn't one for contact.
"Good" she nods.
"I'm Reg-"
"Regulus Black, we all know all about you and your filthy family history. I'd delve into the insults I could spew solely off your family legacy, but it's too much for me to tell in a single day"
"And you are Nyx Crowley. Your beautiful family history of thievery, sly tricks and dark magic is far worse than the tales of my house"
"Messe" she nods.
"So, James can't bully people but you can?"
"You're whole little crew deserves it. Severus doesn't...well, at least not from him"
"How is that fair?"
"Because at least I mock them for being mudbloods, not because of some little crush. It's pathetic and a total embarrassment"
"Do you know the entire story?"
"I'm walking away now"
"I take that as a no?"
"Do you know the entire story, Black? I didn't think so"
"Well it's been lovely" I sighed sarcastically.
"Don't lie to me" she teases, walking away from me.
"There you are" Sirius says, walking out and placing a hand on my shoulder. "You okay?"
"Grand" I nod, looking at him.
"Did she say something to you?"
"Nothing bad"
"Watch her, you remember what her brother did"
"Doesn't mean she will"
"Don't defend her, you don't know her"
"Don't judge her, you don't know her"
"Regulus-"
"I've got to get to potions class, I'll see you later" I say, walking away.
I'm extremely late for class, and I can only pray it would be an easy class today.
Only potions class wouldn't be any easier than dealing with that whole fiasco.
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"my dad didn't strut". get real.
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Barty, doing his homework: what's sunshine in french?
Reg, not looking up from his book: ensoleillement
James: *appearing out of nowhere* yes, sweetheart?
Barty:
Evan:
Pandora:
Dorcas:
Reg: *looks up and realises* oh fuck-
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regulus: do you have happy meals?
server: yup
regulus: can I get that without the meal?
server: . . .
regulus: *voice cracking* please?
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Voldemort: You tricked me!
Regulus: I deceived you. “Tricked” kind of oversells the playfulness of our relationship.
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Sirius: Why? Why, Reg?
Regulus, sighs: Why am I sleeping with James?
Sirius: Is it a pity thing? Do you pity my best friend?
Regulus: …
Sirius: Is he sick? Is Prongs dying?
Regulus: …
Sirius: Are you working for the dark side?
Regulus: …
Sirius: Damn it, he's holding you against your will, isn't he?
Regulus: Sirius-
Sirius: If he is holding you against your will, blink twice
Regulus: …
Sirius, blows at Regulus’s eyes: Blink twice, Reggie
Regulus: Really, Sirius?
Sirius: Is this revenge? When I pushed you into the lake when we were kids?
Sirius: You have a thing for glasses?
Regulus: I’m leaving the room, Sirius
Sirius: Is it huge?
Regulus: Sirius! Really?
Sirius: I'm sorry. Let me rephrase that
Sirius: Is it huge?
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:O
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dating jess and being bam’s best friend moodboard???
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dating jess & being best friends w/ bam ִ ۫ ˑ 𖥻 ִ ۫ ּ
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sirius: if being hot was a crime I'd probably get a life sentence
regulus: then that would suck because you'd be in jail for a crime you didn't commit
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Regulus: *cooing at baby Harry and giving him all his attention*
James: *disgruntled noises*
Regulus: If you have a baby you can’t be the baby.
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Sorry to all those "sirius can sing" stans...but headcannon sirius black sounds like a dying cat singing in the shower and he thinks he sounds angelic...and james changes the subject when he brings it up, peter runs out of the room and remus never shuts up ab how he actually sounds like he's being murdered when he sings "Is there Life On Mars?" by David Bowie
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Regulus: This is bad
Regulus: this is really really bad
Remus: what is it?
Regulus: I- I kissed James
Remus: . . .
Remus: I owe Sirius so much money
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Feel free to message me or send in through the submissions for any writing requests! I’ll be linking my tiktok and Wattpad as soon as I figure it out and I’m beyond excited to get it all going!
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