smilesstardust

[smilesstardust]

When did you find out queer people existed?

Don't remember/always known

6-8 years old

9-11 years old

12-14 years old

15-17 years old

18-21 years old

21-30 years old

30+ years old

Other/explain in the tags

#uhhhhh… this is kinda embarrassing and hard to explain #when I was a toddler one of my friends had a mum in a same sex relationship #this was never hidden from me. in fact it was pretty damn normalised #but nobody ever explained it to me #so as a kid it never really clicked for me that it was A Thing #and I just kind of thought people just fell in love and it never occurred to me to factor gender into that #and nobody ever said the word gay or lesbian #which meant when other kids started using those words I had no concept of what they meant and got very confused #when I was 10 another girl explained it to me during pe after asking if I was a lesbian because I didn’t have a crush #and I got even more confused that it was apparently a whole thing? but assured her I wasn’t a lesbian #(didn’t know it at the time but I am just ace as hell) #it fully took another six years for me to realise that my friend’s mum and her partner were gay #and like. yes it had been about a decade since I’d last seen them. but we got their damn christmas newsletter every year #so… yeah… I do not have a simple answer to this question because in theory I’ve always known but it took a long time to connect those dots

[smilesstardust]

“It’s crooked.” Emmett frowned from the couch.

“Okay, that’s like the fourth time you’ve said that.” Travis turned around. “If you think I’ve done such a bad job of it, you hang the damn mirror.”

Vic let out a loud, barking laugh from where she was assembling the dining chairs. “Dude, he literally can’t.” She called over.

“He makes tea!” Travis shouted back, completely ignoring the ghost on the couch.

Emmett cleared his throat. “He is right here and he finds it easier to move some things than others.”

“And yet you can draw.” Travis muttered, rolling his eyes and turning back to face the mirror. He paused for a moment and adjusted it, tilting it to the left.

“Okay, you just made that way worse.” Emmett disappeared from the couch, only to reappear right beside him a split second later. “You need to move this side down at least two inches.”

Travis obliged, following directions as Emmett called them out.

“Oh hey, looks good.” Vic walked through the living room as they finished, carrying an armful of trash to the designated pile by the front door. “You guys think I’ve got time for a shower before heading down to the woods?”

“Yes, but why?” Travis asked as she sorted the trash into what could and couldn’t be recycled. “You’re just going to change and then spend all night rolling in the dirt.”

She paused for a moment. “Fair point. In that case I’m going to the store and buying a ton of raw meat. Do we still have the cat cage for me to stuff it in?” She said standing up.

“Nope, you destroyed it last full moon.” Travis told her, turning his head to follow her as she walked back to the dining room. “Do you want me to go and get a new one?”

“Please, the woman at the pet store keeps giving me weird looks.” She stuck her head back out of the kitchen a moment later. “Are you good for feeds?”

“Considering you had a slow day yesterday, he’s going to need another couple of blood bags. Or he’ll be unbearable.” Emmett answered for him. “I should be able to steal some from the hospital now you’ve shown me where they are. It’s not like I’m going to be seen on security cameras.”

“Great.” Vic said, carrying another armful of stuff to the pile. “Sounds like we’ve got a plan.”

“Do you want me to check on Hot Doctor while I’m there? See if he flirts with the other paramedics when you’re not around?” He teased, putting on a bad impersonation. “Oh, I’m sorry, I’m tall and blonde and perfect and I only like girls who act uninterested then tell me they can’t have a relationship because they’re sick after I fix their dislocated shoulder.” Travis tried and failed to contain his laughter as she shot them both a glare.

It was a poor imitation of the man Vic had been on a handful of dates with, but she let it slide because the boys didn’t mean anything by it. Neither of her roommates really knew him, as he’d only been to the house twice and both times she had made it very clear that there were to be no supernatural gate crashers, especially not the sort he couldn’t see. He’d met Travis a little at the hospital and Emmett had definitely spied on him a few times, but they didn’t really know much about him.

“I still can’t believe he bought that lie.” Travis chuckled as he put the hammer and unused spirit level away and closed the toolbox with a loud click. “He’s a doctor, and he just believed you when you said you had a non specific medical condition that caused you to black out every full moon?”

“I didn’t phrase it like that.” She groaned loudly. “I might’ve been less specific about the frequency and implied it was due to the trauma of being attacked a few years back? I think he thinks it’s some weird kind of PTSD.”

“He’s going to realise your ‘episodes’ line up with the full moon eventually.”

“Uh, no, he isn’t, because moon cycles are not something most non supernaturally inclined people pay attention to. And I highly doubt he could tell the difference between the full moon and the night before or after.” She stopped in between where the two of them were stood looking at the mirror it had taken all afternoon to put up, resting her elbow on Travis’ shoulder and looking at the reflection.

“Damn.” She said after a moment. “We look good.”

Both of the boys tried to brush off the compliment, clearly flattered, before they realised that neither of them could actually be seen in the mirror.

They both started talking over each other, getting progressively louder as she got further away, the noise of their complaining about what a bad joke and how unfair it had been as a comment echoing after her as she ran up the stairs to get changed.

- Being human!AU

#I’m honestly kind of obsessed with this au #being human!au #Travis as the vampire Vic as the werewolf Emmett as the ghost #(ripley as the love interest because I couldn’t not include a nina/nora character) #station 19 #being human us #being human uk #being human #I took elements from both shows because they are different (past season 1) and I do like both #travis montgomery #vic hughes #emmett dixon

[smilesstardust]

The moment when two of your most recent hyper fixations merge and combine to form an AU that couldn’t possibly exist anywhere else but your brain…

Brb, I need to get as much of it out of my brain as possible before I lose it

#I’m on break for the next couple of weeks #so I might actually do something with this #it’s a station 19 being human!au if anyone is interested

[smilesstardust]

It’s the best day of the year! (From a teaching perspective)

Happy World Book Day!

Here’s a picture of my Annabeth Chase costume, featuring the camp half-blood necklace that I probably put way too much effort into and took me hours to make

#I’m so insanely excited for today it’s honestly a little ridiculous considering it’s 90% a normal day #teacher stuff #percy jackon and the olympians #annabeth chase #world book day

[smilesstardust]

The album Broken by Desire to be Heavenly Sent by Lewis Capaldi is so upstead coded it hurts. ESPECIALLY Jay leaving onwards.

#give me an hour and I could make a power point to prove this #I have been listening to half this album on repeat for months #literally my current playlist is this album Taylor Swift and like four other songs #hailey upton #jay halstead #upstead #lewis capaldi

[smilesstardust]

there are two types of ao3 authors, the type that will post as they are being set on fire and the type that will post every two years.

#I have been both of these people #definitely more the second though

[smilesstardust]

I need external motivation to write because at the moment I ain’t getting around to it, even though I really really want to.

To hold me accountable, send me a 🖋️ and a fic title to get me to write a paragraph and share part of it. (or just a fic title and any questions you’ve got because talking about it will probably make me write at least a little bit)

My current (active) WIP titles

Kit’s out the bag (found! au part 2)

Dance company au

I don’t know what to say, since the twist of fate

There is no morning glory

#fanfic writing

[smilesstardust]

so I got into grad school today with my shitty 2.8 gpa and the moral of the story is reblog those good luck posts for the love of god

[smilesstardust]

I'm generally of the opinion that trying to resurrect prematurely cancelled shows is like necromancy—odds are they'll come back wrong.

Except for Galavant. Any Galavant revivial will be funnier the longer it stayed cancelled.

#I adore galavant and think it is a crime that it is unable to be watched in the uk #like. I would pay money. I would buy the dvd if they sold it. #I would stream it weekly if it was on Disney plus #I already have songs from the soundtrack on my regular playlists in amongst the Taylor Swift and Lewis Capaldi

[smilesstardust]

The desperate urge when you finish binging a show to go back and watch it again because you still have residual brain rot that won’t go away any other way

#this happens every time I watch a new show #fanfic only makes it worse #anyway I finished station 19 yesterday #and now I feel the need to watch season 1&2 again because Vic and Ripley were the highlight of that show

[smilesstardust]

I was chatting to a kid at work last night and I was just listening to her and fighting back the urge to say “god, you’re going to love AO3 when you find it.”

#teacher shit #the kid’s 12 and when she finds fanfic #that’s going to be a good day for her #I will not direct her there because I do have *some* sense of self preservation #and I kind of feel like it’s something best found on your own #archive of our own #ao3

[smilesstardust]

Just one more mile, before we say goodbye

She should never have taken the divorce papers out of the envelope.

She should have just sent them directly on to be filed. Crossed out the address of the apartment she was living out of boxes in, put the court’s and sent them straight on.

But she hadn’t.

Or, Hailey actually gets to struggle with the final act of ending her marriage.

Read it on AO3

#chicago pd #hailey upton #jay halstead #upstead #upstead fanfiction #post 11x01 #not overly happy and positive but more so than what canon gave us

[smilesstardust]

Someday I’m going to have the time and brainpower and motivation to write an entire essay about how Stevie Hammer and the Hammstead pairing could have had an incredible storyline about growth and forgiveness and healing from bad relationships while not allowing them to define you or hold you back.

Today, however, is not that day. As much as I would like it to be.

#my roman empire #I love her #for a character that was in half a season of the damn show I think about her far more than is reasonable #and do not even get me started on how Will and his ending fits in to all of it #chicago med #stevie hammer #will and stevie #hammstead #I think that how it’s spelled

[smilesstardust]

Tell me I’m safe, you’ve got me now

Hailey wasn't expecting a knock on the door early in the morning of her day off. She definitely wasn't expecting to be faced with her estranged husband's five year old daughter when she answered it.

Or a post season 10 AU where Erin had her and Jay's daughter after she left Chicago without telling him and now she's missing, Jay's deployed, and Hailey is the closest thing to a parent left to take custody of the kid.

The eighth and final chapter is up! If you’re still reading thank you so much for sticking with it, and I promise there will be more in this AU to come at some point.

Read it on AO3

#hailey upton #jay halstead #found! au #upstead #chicago pd #upstead fanfiction #one chicago

[smilesstardust]

Tell me I’m safe, you’ve got me now

Hailey wasn't expecting a knock on the door early in the morning of her day off. She definitely wasn't expecting to be faced with her estranged husband's five year old daughter when she answered it.

Or a post season 10 AU where Erin had her and Jay's daughter after she left Chicago without telling him and now she's missing, Jay's deployed, and Hailey is the closest thing to a parent left to take custody of the kid.

Chapter 7 is up, only one more to go! Read it on AO3

#hailey upton #jay halstead #chicago pd #one chicago #upstead fanfiction #upstead #found! au

[smilesstardust]

Tell me I’m safe, you’ve got me now

Hailey wasn't expecting a knock on the door early in the morning of her day off. She definitely wasn't expecting to be faced with her estranged husband's five year old daughter when she answered it.

Or a post season 10 AU where Erin had her and Jay's daughter after she left Chicago without telling him and now she's missing, Jay's deployed, and Hailey is the closest thing to a parent left to take custody of the kid.

Chapter 6 and we finally have an appearance from Jay! Read it on AO3

#chicago pd #hailey upton #jay halstead #upstead #found! au #upstead fanfiction #one chicago

[smilesstardust]

Tell me I’m safe, you’ve got me now

Hailey wasn't expecting a knock on the door early in the morning of her day off. She definitely wasn't expecting to be faced with her estranged husband's five year old daughter when she answered it.

Or a post season 10 AU where Erin had her and Jay's daughter after she left Chicago without telling him and now she's missing, Jay's deployed, and Hailey is the closest thing to a parent left to take custody of the kid.

Chapter 5 is up! Read it on AO3

In other news, I’m back at work now, so uploads of the last few chapters, while still planned to be daily, might be a bit more sporadic timing wise.

#chicago pd #hailey upton #jay halstead #found! au #upstead #upstead fanfiction #one chicago