#ANYWAY THIS IS MESSY AS HELL BUT ITS DONE SO. CLINK CLINK 3 MONTHS LATE AHWKFJAKS

[faarkas]

26 or 13 for an oc of your choice :3

TY @swordcoasts DEE SORRY ITS BEEN LIKE THREE MONTHS HAHA 😭😭😭💀💀💀

how dare you (x) characters: adrian (oc), river w/ard (canon) words: 1,642 warnings: injuries, mentions of blood, riv is injured protecting her and adrian is taking care of him

Also I’m saying fuck it to the 3-10 sentence rule and just trying to aim under 1000 words for the rest of these bc that’s NOT ENOUGH SENTENCES. and i never write adrian river... sooooo

edit: I’m fairly certain I broke both the rules. Let me finish counting words.

edit 2: Rules are made to be broken

Her heart thrums in her veins, time moving agonizingly slow as Adrian keeps watch over River from an chair that she’d pulled up to the side of her bed from across the room. He’s asleep with her sheets pulled up to his collarbones, stabilized, dressings over two gunshot wounds. One on his side, the other on his shoulder.

To just jump in front of her, take a bullet for her… She’s struggling to wrap her head around why he did that. And it had all happened so fast, a red dot she just barely managed to spot crawling up her sternum to her forehead, and then darkness as he stepped in and shielded her from the shots.

Adrian’s heard a lot of wounded sounds in her life, but his keep haunting her, and it’s starting to make her feel nauseous as all hell. He should have let her just take the shots, her implants would have likely protected her. Or given her enough time to drag herself home and take care of her wounds…or she would have just died.

None are particularly terrible options to her, honestly. The way worse scenario would be River giving up the ghost for her, some random suicidal vigilante sniper who has been running around on twice borrowed time anyway. He’s a good man with a family that loves him and vice versa. Last thing she’d want is for them to lose him. Good men are hard to find in this hellish city.

Oh, fuck.

She’s starting to care.

A sudden need to put some space between herself and him propels Adrian out of her chair, her shoulder aching from being pushed into the least padded part of it–

She can’t move without checking his vitals.

Pausing, she casts one more glance at the cell phone-sized monitor displaying them before she quietly pads through the dimness towards the glow of the vending machine in her kitchen, trying to ignore this new revelation that’s making her skin itch.

It’s scary for her to care. Caring deeply for people was something she swore off when her family died— And there’s the guilt now. Making her feel heavy and her insides churn. It’s been years now, but she is ultimately loyal to a fault, and it almost feels like she’s betraying her late husband to have feelings for another man.

Marek would want her to be happy, deep down she knows it, he would hate to see what she’s become, but…

Adrian hits a few buttons on the vending machine beside her mini fridge, rubbing a hand across her brow with a heavy sigh as the eddies deduct from her account in the bottom left corner of her vision, two bottles advertising ‘real’ water dropping down into the basket with a thud that echoes in the silent apartment.

It doesn’t matter how she feels, River is here now and she has to take care of him for what he did. He should be fine though, definitely sore for a few weeks while his body knits itself back together, but she did a pretty fucking great job of getting them all cleaned and debrided. 

It’s been a few years since she was a licensed medical professional, but years of surgeries and the way the military and then trauma team drilled information into their people made it pretty hard to forget…and thank fuck, thinking about anything except River and the growing feelings she’s been trying to successfully ignore until now is helping, until she realizes she’s quietly walking back to her bed– and him.  

She freezes a few steps away when River groans and stirs, his cybernetic eye glowing a brighter white as he wakes up. It’s dim in her apartment, there’s just not a lot of light in it to begin with, but with her upgraded kiroshis she can see him blink as he takes in his surroundings, growing increasingly tense until his warm brown eye lands on her and he relaxes.  

“Hey, Bennett.” His voice is raspy and deep from sleep, and way too fucking warm for her hyper-aware little brain to stand right now. “Surprised you haven’t sold me for parts yet.”

The teasing gives her just enough of a reboot, Adrian forcing herself to walk forward and set the two waters down on the night table. “I was, you just woke up before I could get started.” 

River chuckles as he tries to pull himself up, his expression contorting into a grimace as she reflexively reaches out and puts a hand on top of his shoulder to stop him from moving and screwing up all her hard work.

“Don’t move.” Adrian’s voice wavers a little as she places her cold hand on his shoulder, taking care not to touch the dressing. Through she really should just give him a punch in it for being an overprotective dumbass.

There’s a pause between them when their eyes meet, the air shifting and suddenly feeling..heavier as she stands over him. He really is handsome…and she needs to stop. She pulls away with a sigh. “Um, I can get you anything you need. Just don’t move.” 

“So, uh, what’s the damage?” River asks, sliding back down and mercifully pulling the blanket back up his toned chest. She pulls her hand away. 

“Eh, a shot through your upper pectoralis major, another tore through your exterior oblique but missed a rib.” Adrian recounts, trying to ignore how the tips of her fingers tingle now and he listens to her so intently. 

She loses the battle faster than she’d like to admit, rubbing her thumb over her fingertips to scratch the tingly itch. It helps a little. 

“Some of us didn’t go to medical school.” 

Adrian rolls her eyes at his poor attempt at the humor she's always hated in movies while River reaches for one of the waters, groaning in discomfort when his wounded shoulder stretches. 

“Through your tit and side, dumbass.” Adrian swats his hand away, cracking the cap on the bottle and handing it to him with a pointed look. He never fucking listens when it matters.  

“Thank you. Sorry.” “Don’t mention it.” 

While he drinks, Adrian allows herself to settle back into the chair beside him. Fidgeting with the rough edge of her blanket so she isn’t just…staring at him while he drains the bottle.  

“Y’know, this is a nice apartment.” River compliments thoughtfully, screwing the cap back onto the bottle with one hand. 

The anxiety and tension that’s been making her feel so…edgy flashes to anger, Adrian finally starting to get a little pissed at how cavalier he’s taking all of this. He could have fucking died for her, and now he thinks he can be all cute about it. 

“How dare you.” She snaps before she can stop herself, crossing her arms and frowning at him.

River frowns, offering the bottle of water back to her without stretching his injured shoulder this time. “I…can’t compliment your apartment?” 

“It’s not that and you fucking know it. Why did you take those shots for me? Didn’t take you for a total gonk.”

Confusingly enough, a smile slowly spreads across his face. Maybe she gave him too high a dose of painkiller and that’s why he’s being so chill, she did kinda have to guesstimate his weight. 

“Aww, you don’t think I’m a total gonk?” He says lightly. “Someone was worried about me.”

“I was not.” Adrian retorts, not nearly as sharply as she meant to.

“I think someone might care about me.” River’s smile widens, the warm teasing making her feel like a petulant child in how it makes her just want to pout and turn away from him with her arms crossed.

Adrian scoffs. “I do not.” 

“Whatever you have to tell yourself.” River looks away, shifting around and adjusting his blankets. “Anyway, you would have done the same for me.” 

“You don’t know that.”

She would. Of course she would. 

“No, I don’t…but I like to think you would.” River says thoughtfully, looking back up at her with a look that she can't quite place. He's right...though she'll never let him know that until the time comes— and he fucking lets her. He needs to learn to share the protective life threatening stunts.

“I’ll let you live in the fantasy. Now go back to sleep, I haven’t discharged you yet.”

“Have you slept yet?”

“Don’t worry about that.”

He frowns at her, clearly displeased but he's alive because she stayed up...and she doesn't really sleep much anyway. He knows this. He also knows if he picks a fight with her she'll just get that much more stubborn about whatever they're talking about, so someone just needs to pipe down and get his rest.

“Adrian-“ He starts exasperatedly, about to continue bickering with her she’s sure, so she quickly interrupts him.

“I can put those bullets right back in if you don’t listen to me. Still got them over there.” She nods toward the bloody mess of towels, clothes on the few tiles of her kitchen floor, a plastic bag of metal shards sitting on the counter above them. Only one of the bullets had fragmented, and it only split into four easy pieces at that.

So whoever was after her tonight wasn’t that experienced, because it really should have been way fucking worse. Must be a bounty out there on her head now, she’s gotta remember to check her sites and see how high the price is and where she’s been posted to gauge whatever danger she’s in.

River just sighs, conceding as he relaxes into her grey sheets. She’s pretty certain she’s going to have to get new ones after this.

“Night, Ward.” She says victoriously, keeping her expression neutral, but she can’t resist giving him a firm pat on the arm.

“Goodnight, Bennett.”

#me: Yeah adrian has an apartment. #Me the other night right before i left for the river: *picking out houses to decorate in arroyo* #Smfh. #ocstuff #oc: adrian #a x r #hil writes #ANYWAY THIS IS MESSY AS HELL BUT ITS DONE SO. CLINK CLINK 3 MONTHS LATE AHWKFJAKS #THANKS DEE SORRY AGAIN #Hope i put all my edits in i was copying this to my google docs so i could get the word count and editing as i went in both tumblr and the #doc so. once again i’m the antithesis of work smarter not harder #I like adrian n riv bc adrian is like No i don’t fucking like u what the fuck. U will never know. #Fast forward like 3 years and he’s like *leaving late* Gotta work on a case sorry and she’s like #🥺 Without me?????? *trudging out to the truck as he’s about to leave with a big fluffy blanket around her shoulders #a rifle and her big first aid kit* What if u get hurt 🥺

[latenightdecaf]

Entry 7 - Summer of Vulnerability

part of let the pile of good things grow series - series masterlist

previous entry here

Yoongi x reader

Ft. nonidol!bts (glimpse of ex-boyfriend!namjoon)

Producer!yoongi, roommate!yoongi, soft!yoongi

slow burn romance, friendship, slice of life

series of drabbles/one shots

warnings: alcohol consumption

a/n: okay so here goes y/n remembering his ex!joon also will never get over of in the soop yoongi! can’t wait for the new season. Thank you guys for reading! 🙈

word count: 2,546

Went home from the grocery and some of their wines are on sale so you got carried away and bought 8 bottles and to your surprise, Yoongi’s cooking steak. “oh my God!” You exclaimed as soon as you saw him cooking in the kitchen with paperbag of wines in your arms. Yoongi looked at you with a confused face.

“Did you just read my mind or what??! There’s a sale on the corner deli and…” raising both of your hands as if surrendering, “okay don’t judge me yet but i got a little carried away.”

“A little carried away? You looked like the world’s going to run out of wine tomorrow.”

He smiled on your disclaimer and shaking his head as he paid his attention back to his steak.

“No.” You sighed. “Nothing went my way today, not at all—but i dont want to think about it. I’m psyching myself out of it you see, or better yet i’m drowning myself on these babies.” As you drank your first glass empty. “My eternal companion, the love of my life…”

He turned to your direction, only to see you hugging the bottles of wine that you bought.

He turned to your direction, only to see you hugging the bottles of wine that you bought.

“Come on clear the tables, your babies are not going anywhere.” He declared as he puts down 3 steaks and some aglio olio with honestly way too much garlic because it’s Yoongi.

“I didn’t saw you made pasta also. I am so happy now.” You happily exclaimed as you took a bite of your new favorite steak. “But why the 3 steaks? You hungry?”

He sat in front of you, filling your glass with wine and his too.

“You need food before you chug them all up. I’m not gonna clean up your mess. So you better get it together today. I tell you.” He scolded you.

“Sure sure.” As you immediately devour the pasta he made.

One bottle of wine down. He let you listened to a ‘sketch’ he’s been working on lately. Carefully studying your already flushed face for any reaction. He does this sometimes, ask for your opinion even though you have zero idea about music and producing or anything related to that for that matter.

All he considers is whether you winced at the melody of it, or you nod and eventually smile as it goes. But this time you’re just staring blankly in your wine glass, circling it repeatedly as the sketch ended at exactly 2 mins and 19 secs. And when it ended you looked straight at him.

“This looks like it’s almost done right?” You commented. “Yeah.” As he gulps on his wine, emptying another glass.

“And you wrote the lyrics also?” He nodded.

You looked away and sighed. “It’s too beautiful—Sad and in pain, feels tormented also but beautiful.”

He blinked several times at your words. You’ve heard several of his sketches before and you’d just always say, ‘it sounds good, but Yoongi—i have no idea about music. Zero.’ But he’d let you hear it anyway for couple more times and he’d smile at your ignorant reactions.

This time however, doesn’t seem like a laughing matter. Something about your words got his heart beating faster and he has no idea if its just the amount of alcohol he has consumed by now or just you.

You clinked on his empty glass. And asked, “You want more?” He nodded. And you poured him another. “Remember the girl, I introduced to you before?” You stopped and think for a second and it dawned to you. “Hell yeah, I remember.”

“She’s actually my ex-girlfriend.” He declared.

“Well that I did not expected. The ex part. I can tell though she looks really special.”

“Well, we’re together for a while. But now we’re just co-workers for this debut song of a girl I told you about before. That’s why she was here also the last time, we were looking through old sketches that I have after the meeting. We actually finished that quite early. ”

He never really talked that much about himself. He’s good at talking about work, which for you is already more than enough. You know that despite your living situation, he’s not really obligated to get personal if he doesnt want to. And besides, you also don’t want to. Your end of the rope for sure is scared of any form of vulnerability anyway—so you’re not expecting or demanding that from anybody else.

“So you’re just co-workers now?”

“Yeah, I think so. I really don’t know what I feel.”

“Well, relationships are messy my friend.” Raising your glass of wine as if to cheers and chugging it in one go.

Not sure of what to say next but he looks like he’s in mood to talk but the topic looks too sensitive to even crack a joke so you continued drinking despite the eerie atmosphere.

“If you dont mind me asking, what happened?” Yes, despite your immense effort to hold yourself back. Like any other novel you read, you have this eager feeling to know how it ends. Your mind is literally shouting, ‘But I gots to know!!’

And so you asked. Half fearing for your life for being too nosy and half expecting that you might be up for a good story. Elbows resting on the table, with your chin at the palm of your hand looking eager to hear the story.

“We’ve been together for a while”

“Yeah, you said that already.. and that she’s a song writer. I figured.” Unconsciously saying your thoughts out loud.

“You wanna tell the story instead?” He teasingly reacted in a straight face.

“I didn’t mean to say that out loud… I literally said that in my mind and my mouth just burst it open. They both can’t coordinate that well. I’m sorry. You may continue…sir. Please don’t cut my head off.” You love teasing him.

“You’re drunk.” He was pointing out the obvious by that time, after two bottles of wine.

“Yes she’s a songwriter. They said before thay she’s the words to my melody. Well… before.”

Something about those words just made your heart ache. Frowning in his words you continue to listen.

“We’re together for about 2 years? And then on and off after…. She cheated on me, slept with another producer from another company. I really thought that was the end but after that i still accepted her. I don’t know why.”

“Aigoo you dumbass solider of love. And then??” Continuously frowning in frustration led you to keep on drinking.

He has no plans of actually telling this story tonight, it just poured out. You’re just one of those people that actually listens. He has seen you before, how intensely you focus on a movie or in a book that it bothers you for day. You love hearing stories and your willingness felt like a safe space for his unspoken scars.

“She keeps coming back to me and I keep accepting her. That’s it.”

With a confused look on your face, “I don’t get it.”

“Like you said, relationships are messy.” He’s obviously trying to close the topic already but that’s not going to stop you—you never stop midway of the story. This is not how it ends.

“Messy is one thing, toxic is another. And since when are you a coward? You don’t strike me as one. Really.” ‘Yeah i was.’ Yoongi thought in his head. Words are just literally pouring out of your mouth by now, drowning yet another glass. Yoongi opening your forth bottle.

“Boy, I bought the wrong alcohol tonight, tequila would’ve been perfect.” You declared as he pours you a refill. He laughed at this comment, he kept wondering sometimes how easy it is for you to make him laugh.

“No but all kidding aside… Hard question coming in, Min Yoongi. Do you still love her?” Looking right at his eyes and him staring back at you as he answered. “No, we broke up a month before I moved in here.”

‘That’s quite a while, at least 9 or 10 months now…’ you thought to yourself

“Yeah but having been broken up doesn’t mean that love is gone. It’s not a switch you know.”

“I know. And I wish it was, she’s was a big part of my life I’m not denying that and maybe she always will be. But I’ve changed, she has changed—we’re no longer the same people that we were in the same relationship where I keep questioning my self worth. That’s done now, over. Love took a turn, and it doesn’t look the same anymore. We’re just co-workers now that’s all.”

You like the way he said it. Being no longer the same people that they were. You nodded in his statement not sure what to say next and also feeling a little dizzy.

“I gotta pee.” You suddenly declared and stood up, ran in small steps to the bathroom with Yoongi smiling at you and shaking his head.

And when you got back, he got you a warm water on your favorite mug.

Your thoughts are all over the place when you’re drunk, like you said—your mouth just spills it all out.

“You know what, this is all very brave of you. Being friends with your ex, I can’t imagine.”

“Why? Can’t you?” Staring blankly and holding onto your mug, eyes blinking fast in this question.

“I’m not sure. I’ve never really done it before, I’ll let you know if I can.”

You’ve been staring hard on your mug contemplating on his question. He gently touched your hand that’s been holding your mug and said, “Just drink your water.” And pulled it away as soon as you looked like your soul has comeback to earth.

“Can’t I…?” You repeated the question again, and this time out loud.

Hands underneath your chin and resting your elbows on the table. Yoongi is just staring at you, hands in his cheeks—thumb underneath his chin, not even sure if you can even see him. “I hate your question.” You looked at his eyes this time and said that and he just smiled and when he did, you narrowed your eyes. “I hate your smile too.” And this time, he gave you an even bigger one, those gummy smile. And whenever he smiles at you like that you just can’t help but grin in return.

You chugged the water and showed him your empty mug.

He got up and put the rest of the unopened bottle of wine back to the fridge just to prevent you from opening yet another. With his back facing you, arranging the couple of bottles left unto your fridge.

“Yoongi-ah, I know and I love how we respect each other’s privacy and all but just in case things get too heavy. I’m always here, you know. I mean, I’m really glad about today.”

He looked back at you, hands underneath your chin again and eyelids looking all heavy.

“Same goes for you, I’m always here…” And he turned his back again, “fixing you some food and light bulbs.”

And that statement made you smile. “Indeed, my friend. Indeed.”

He went back to the table and grabbed your wine glass and emptying it for you.

“So you wanna talk about how nothing went right today?” You sighed with your eyes closed.

“Maybe next time, my friend.” You stood up from the dinning table, offered to clean the rest of the dishes but Yoongi insisted that he’d do it instead. So you just nodded and slowly creep back into your room.

“Thanks for today, Yoongi.” You thanked him before you go, peeking behind the wall near the counter and he just smiled at you, cleaning gloves on and started washing the dishes.

Minutes later, you shouted from inside of your room.

“Hey i’ll be in the bathroom for a while. Hope you’re already done using it.”

Yoongi didnt answer. He’s already in his room.

You sat in the tub filled with water that is too hot for anyone else but not for you. Head all dizzy and pounding. It’s 2 am and nothing is more comforting than the silence of it all. Alcohol keeps you awake, more than coffee ever does. The dizziness, the feeling that is drilling in your head, makes it hard for you to sleep. Despite the fact that you always drink. You always drink on an empty stomach though, just so you’re sure you would pass out and not have a hard time sleeping.

But tonight you can’t say no—Yoongi made dinner and as much as you hate how you’re having a hard time now you don’t regret it. The question he said, still lingers. And you know your answer to this, you can’t.

Along with the headache, comes the memories you rarely remember—there are just some special days where somehow the guilt and regret still comes to you in waves, together with conversations you long to let go.

“You can’t be serious?” Joon said, voice cracking with hand on his hair in frustration. “But I am.” With a straight face you answered, “I can’t marry you, Joon. I don’t want to have kids and I know how much you want to have children.” Feeling the desperation in his face and actions, he held your hands close and hugged you. “I love you, I want to marry you. We don’t need to have kids immediately, that’s years away. We don’t have to even worry about that now.” It hurts you to seem him this way, yes both of you may be young—maybe you will change your mind but there’s no guarantee to it. You held onto his shoulder to see his face, tears kept rolling down his face and you keep wiping it off one by one. You’ve thought about this even just a year into the relationship, with all the dad jokes and tiny little shoes he kept in his room. He’s going to be a wonderful dad you thought—maybe not just to your kids because you don’t want one.

The most wonderful man in the world just asked you to marry him a few minutes ago, and now he’s crying on your shoulder in defeat. While you can’t even bring yourself to cry, everything about this just made you numb. You just know you’re doing the right thing. Keeping him by your side with a promise of a future you can’t guarantee is not what love is. You loved him—even much so that you could ever admit.

With the knock on the door, you went back to reality.

“Hey you in there?” His voice echoing at 2 in the morning.

“Yeah, I’ll be here still for a while. You need it?”

“No, it’s okay.” He quietly said, as you heard his footsteps getting farther away.

moodboard sr: x

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