#GUYS I AM SO SORRY I NEARLY FORGOT TO UPLOAD LMAO!

[ambitions-of-an-eccedentesiast]

...soooooo was that like- part of the plan orrrrr??

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#the ambitions of an eccedentesiast #taoae #dr jekyll and mr hyde #ocs #chapter two #page nine #GUYS I AM SO SORRY I NEARLY FORGOT TO UPLOAD LMAO! #RAH #hhhhh #a ny way #*finally things can stop feeling samey* #I also know a lot more about lampposts than I needed too thanks to this page ::] #wooooooo

[ivysimagines]

Hey, love. 💞 I hope you’re having a WONDERFUL day! Can I request a Blurb w/ JJ x Fem! Reader? The Reader is John B’s younger sister, and it’s the Hot Tub Scene? JJ and the Reader planned on being married in the future. JJ fantasized buying her a gargantuan engagement ring, but the pair acknowledged they wouldn’t be able to afford it. However, alongside the Hot Tub, Generators, and Delivery, he bought her an engagement ring too? Angst w/ Fluff, please? Thank you! 💞

of course I can! sorry it took me a bit to get to this. I’ve had bad allergies n haven’t been in the mood to write. anyways, the scenario isn’t exactly the way it is in the episode but i made it pretty similar.

pairing: JJ Maybank x Fem! Reader

request: above.

warning: mentions of abuse, cussing, angst w/ fluff, and underage drinking.

-

Title: Catch

-

(thoughts are in italics and bold!)

I sit in the backseat of Pope’s truck listening to trees rustling and the tires driving over the old rocky pavement.

They seriously need to get this road redone.

“Guys, this has gotta be done before my scholarship interview in the morning” Pope says.

I roll my eyes.

Will he ever shut up about that?

Like, he’s smart as fuck.

You’ll get a scholarship somewhere.

“Oh my god, Pope” i say, making it clear i’m annoyed.

“What, Y/N?”

“Guys, no fighting” kiara adds while reaching for her seatbelt buckle.

Okay mom.

Pope parks his truck near some trees.

We all unbuckle our seatbelts quickly and hop out.

Pope and Kie are talking about the plan to get the gold.

I hate that John B gets into this shit.

This is exactly how our dad died.

He can’t die or I’ll have no one.

I walk to the back of the truck and slip my phone into my back pocket.

I lean against the truck while Pope and Kie talk.

I shoo away some nats.

“Damn nats” I say as I kill one.

I hear Kie laugh a little.

Suddenly a shit ton of lights come on around us.

We hear a whirring sound.

“What the hell?” Pope says.

I look over to them and back at the lights.

“Who the hell is that?” kie adds.

We all begin walking towards the center of all the lights hoping to find whoever the fuck did this.

I walk behind them and we hear a cork pop.

I cross my arms and nearly trip over a stick.

We stop and I see it’s my boyfriend, JJ Maybank.

“What did you do JJ?” Pope asks him clearly concerned.

JJ smiles a little, “i’ve got a jet going straight in my butt right now.”

“Y’all should get in immediately, you hear me?”

He grabs three glasses and pours the champagne.

I can tell he’s avoiding looking at me.

“Salud!” he says as he raises the champagne.

“How much did this cost?” Pope asks.

I look back and forth between Pope and JJ.

“Uh. well, with the generator, the petrol, and oh, hey, express delivery...uh, i’d say pretty much all of it”

“All of it?”

“Yeah, all of it”

He looks over at me and then back at Pope.

“You spent all of the money in one day?”

“Yeah, burned a hole right through my pocket. But I mean like, come on guys, like, look at this! Finest in jet-based massage therapy, at least that’s what they told me.”

I stare at JJ with a look of disappointment.

JJ looks over to me.

“Babe, what?” JJ asks.

“Can’t a man have a little luxury in his life! C’mon, all this scrimpin’ and scrapin’..i mean like...guys, we- y’know you only live once, right?” JJ says.

I look at Pope and Kie.

“Like, y/n couldn’t you use some fun in your life? You’ve been all down and shit since your-” he stops himself before finishing his sentence.

Asshole.

“Alright, enough of this emotional shit. Get in the cat’s ass. Come on.” he adds.

“In the what?” Kie asks.

“...in the cat’s ass. That’s what i named her” JJ says while looking off to the side.

It’s quiet for a maximum of 3 seconds.

“Oh, hey, yo, i almost forgot-”

JJ reaches forward and flips a switch and it turns on some disco ball.

“Yeah, that’s right, i know. Disco mode, baby” he says.

“Are you kidding me?!” Pope says in an agitated tone.

“You could’ve paid for restitution!” Pope yells.

“Or literally given it to any charity!” Kie adds.

“Or added it to a fucking fund to get the hell out of here!” i yell.

JJ looks right at me.

“Or bought supplies to get the rest of the damn gold out of the well!” (pope)

JJ turns away and rubs his face.

“Okay, well, you know what?” JJ yells.

He stands up revealing purple and red marks on his stomach.

All these different thoughts began racing through my mind and I could feel my heartbeat speeding up.

Oh my god.

He said things were getting better at home.

...i’m gonna kill that motherfucker.

How can he do that shit to his own fucking kid?

Maybe it’s a good thing my mom dipped and my dad’s dead.

“I didn’t do that!” JJ yells.

“I got a hot tub! For my friends- you know what? No, screw friends. I got a hot tub for my family!”

I look at him and tears start forming.

He looks over to me.

“And, I got something especially for you” he says as he reaches into his swim trunks pocket.

I look at him and he pulls out something small.

“Catch” (JJ)

I open my hands and catch a ring in my hand.

I take a look at it.

It’s not just any ring.

It’s a gargantuan engagement ring.

Holyshitholyshitholyshitholyshitholyshitholyshitholyshitholyshit

I look up at him.

“JJ…”

It’s silent for a few seconds.

I walk over to the hot tub and step on the ladder.

I get inside with him as he rants about ‘everything being fine’.

I pull him into a tight hug.

He starts crying into me.

“I love you” i whisper into his ear.

I rub his back.

It’s quiet as we hug.

Kie and Pope get in with us and we all hug JJ.

“I just wanna do the right thing and I thought-” he says.

“We know, we know. It’s okay, love” i say.

After a few minutes JJ calms down and Pope and Kie leave us.

*now sitting on the edge of the hot tub talking to JJ*

I mess with the ring in my fingers.

“JJ...I don't need some fancy ring” i say.

“I know, but I wanted such an..important ring to be nice”

I look over at him.

“So, this is an engagement ring?”

He smiles at me and nods.

“I know we’re still teenagers and...obviously you can’t exactly get parental consent. Plus, John B would totally kill me if we got married this young. But, we can still be engaged.” he says.

I smile at him and look back down.

“You know, you haven’t asked me”

He sighs and laughs softly.

He takes the ring from out of my hand and looks at me.

“Alright, Y/N Routledge, will you make me literally the happiest man in the world and marry me in a few years?”

I smile at him and bite my lip a little.

“Definitely, one thousand percent”

He smiles and grabs my left hand softly.

He slips the ring onto my ring finger and then places his hand on my face.

We kiss a couple times before I pull away.

I look at the ring on my finger.

Holy shit.

I’m like...engaged now.

What the fuck?

I contain my excitement and just smile.

“So, we could get married when we turn 18...or whenever using our share of the 400 mil and then get the fuck out of here. Away from the obx, away from the pogue bullshit, just...everything” he says.

I stare at him for a few seconds.

“Okay, as long as we can get a dog”

He smiles and nods.

“Named willow?”

“Of course, whatever you want” he says.

I smile at him and we kiss again.

We continue our night together and eventually head to my house.

-

Hope you enjoy!

Once again, request whatever you would like.

I will also be experimenting with thing like ‘dating ___ would include…’ (i love those types of things lmao)

I might start writing a lot for atypical since i’ve gone back into my atypical phase (13rw as well but idk if ima write for that series or not).

Thanks for readinggg!

Upload schedule:

Monday @ 10 am (EST)

Wednesday @ 3 pm (EST)

Friday @ 8 pm (EST)

There may be random uploads here and there.

If you request something I will upload it on one of those days.

BYEEE <33

#jjmaybank jjmaybank x reader obximagine outerbanks john b new writer jj x reader #jj maybank x fem!reader

[sailorzakuro]

MY BIG STRICTLY PARTY POST OF THE 2020 FINAL

Um... excuse me... Mr Bill Bailey won... and I am deceased.

For real I screamed so hard I knackered my jaw which is problematic anyway but now it’s slightly worse and it’s painful to eat but BILL FUCKING BAILEY THE COMEDIAN FINALLY WON 😭. I’ll get into it later I need to actually talk about the dances haha.

HRVY and Janette (Jive) - I’m remembering the criticisms I had about his Jive in that first week, I mean it was obviously amazing then but I knew where I could see areas for improvement, and oh my GOD did he improve them. He had more precision, he extended his arms fully upwards, just everything was so much cleaner and I was so happy for him 😂.

Jamie and Karen (Charleston) - Similar to HRVY’s Jive I remembered what I wanted from this dance and, again, Jamie BROUGHT it, he loosened up and cleaned up so much and he looked so much more relaxed with it. The first time round this dance definitely made him more confident but you could really feel a total change in his attitude towards himself and his dancing this time.

Bill and Oti (Quickstep) - AHH SORRY I’LL TRY TO BE CALM but AGAIN he really cleaned up this dance! First time it was the “oh snap Bill Bailey’s actually good” dance, but there was still flaws. I feel like this time he really added more grace to his movements, keeping the energy and the lightness of the footwork but adding in those smooth dynamics that make some of the moves feel deeper, it was great 😂.

Maisie and Gorka (Samba) - I have to say, BOLD move giving her the Samba again, but she did well with it! I felt like her balance was a lot better this time round, looking back at the first time she did it there was some balance issues probably to do with her feet, but she was very stable throughout this and achieved the technical and performance aspects of her moves really well 😂.

HRVY and Janette (Showdance) - I mean... that was perfect. Choreo was on point, everything was executed perfectly, what more do you want? And you can tell Janette’s been itching to do a Showdance WE’RE HAPPY FOR YOU JANETTE WELL DONE HUN 😂.

Jamie and Karen (Showdance) - Oh the shaaaaaaade starting with the dance off lights THEN HE JUST FUCKING FLIES DOWN LIKE YES WE LOVE I think this dance was just totally Jamie like everything this dance was, was just Jamie 😂.

Bill and Oti (Showdance) - Now THAT’S a Showdance, Bill was playing guitar, Oti was spinning on a hoola hoop, they were doing dance moves from their previous dances, it was literal fire, and it gives me SO much faith in humanity that the guy who did the rock and roll epic go for it dark Showdance won, thank you for that 😂. AND CRAIG GAVE HIM A 10 YES THANK YOU AGAIN 😭🤘.

Maisie and Gorka (Showdance) - I think this was more suited for a Christmas special than the main final but it was great! They really went for the classy Hollywood style Showdance and Maisie really captures that style well, she was gliding around no problem with such finesse and spirit 😂.

HRVY and Janette (American Smooth) - Again, perfect, I have nothing else to say.

Jamie and Karen (Couple’s Choice) - LOVED IT AGAIN tbh I didn’t see how Jamie could dance this any better than he did first time but HE DID he just had that absolute power in his moves and, again, had the absolute spirit of the dance just flowing throughout him it was amazing 😂.

Bill and Oti (Couple’s Choice) - THE WINNING DANCE I GUESS Bill also cleaned up his moves here it was amazing! He improved on the energy in his top half, as last time I felt like there was an energetic and precision imbalance between his top half and his bottom half, and this time they were A LOT closer. His hands shaping was great, his arms moved with sharper and tighter movements, it just flowed a lot better to me 😂.

Maisie and Gorka (Couples’ Choice) - (nearly forgot whoopsie) I mean it looked pretty similar to the first time for me but it was really good the first time so 😂.

Okay, now we get BONUS ROOOUUUUND 😂.

Nicola and Katya (whatever dance it was supposed to be idk Showdance??) - SHE’S BACK YEEEEEEES and WOW has that long amount of time to practice paid off she was EXCEPTIONAL to me. Honestly, comparing stuff like her Jive and her Couple’s Choice to THAT was, wow, I don’t even know what to say 😂. First of all, dancing to Muse, love them, second, she had so much better posture and shaping in her upper body it all looked so smooooooooth 😂. I think there was a couple of balance issues with the lifts, but who cares this wasn’t competitive so does it matter? 😂. I’m just so proud of her 😭. AND FINALLY SOME CLOSE DANCING BETWEEN TWO FEMALES I’M GLAD THEY WENT FOR IT LMAO.

Okay, next is my favourite part of every final, THE LOSERS DANCE (or the rejects group as Anneka came up with last year), but the clip’s not been uploaded to YouTube yet and I cba looking it up on iPlayer so I’m gonna go from memory 😂. THEY DIDN’T COME OUT IN ORDER WTF I mean I know they wanted Caroline for the “Sweet Caroline” bit but surely they could have stretched Jacqui, Jason, Nicola and Max over that part until Caroline’s bit 😂. But I do get ending with the infamous POW Samba 😂. I loved seeing Ranvir in her Dreamgirls dress again though, that was such an iconic dance of hers and it made her believe in herself I think, so even though she couldn’t be in the final she got a sense of glory there 😂. Sorry I’m still not over Ranvir getting booted off 😭. I can’t remember much else haha, there was the Christmas stuff which was nice 😂. Omg Gio playing the xylophone tho iconic 😂.

And that leads us on to... THE CROWNING MOMENT. My man, the comedian, the metal loving icon, Bill ruddy bloody Bailey, only went and won 😂. Not even just for Bill himself, but the fact a comedian who is so musical and loves and embraces heavy music and expressed that through a lot of his dances, just makes me so happy 😂. Bill himself of course is amazing, he’s hilarious, he’s dedicated, he won’t let anyone try and make him the wally or the stupid one, he put so much time and effort in, proved everyone wrong and did it how he wanted to. What can I say, I stan a rebel 😂. For the past 3 series I’ve been watching the comedian has either been my favourite or one of my top couples, I know them and I love them and their work, and if one day I can be one myself I’ll be so happy. But to watch this comedian go out there and be serious, embrace each dance as it comes, but still be himself? I respect that SO much, and I don’t think I could have been happier with any other winner. Well, of course not, they were my joint favourites from the start 😂. AND MOTSI OMG SHE WAS SO PROUD OF OTI WINNING AGAIN (do not start that conspiracy I do not want to hear it) AND I MEAN WE ALL FELT THE SAME 😭. So, well done Bill and Oti, just for giving a big old v sign to what people tried to make you. You can do things properly and not lose yourself, that’s the story of Bill Bailey on Strictly 😂.

And now my big thank you to ANYONE who has read any of my posts this year. I know I can be biased, I know I can be problematic, but it makes me feel so good to share my love for this weird BBC show about teaching celebrities how to ballroom dance 😂. It’s just so much fun to share my love for this show, and to anyone who actually reads and cares about what I have to say, I thank you SO much. Seriously, thank you ❤️. I guess until next year!!

#strictly come dancing #strictly come dancing 2020 #yes i watch strictly #bill bailey #oti mabuse

[yiqiie]

IDOL PRODUCER S2: E2 THOUGHTS

every week, i’ll sit down and watch the newest episode of Idol Producer Season 2 《青春有你》and write down all my thoughts. nothing get’s left out so get ready for a bunch of memes, shit posts and rants as we get through another season of our fave survival show 

feel free to send me any questions to my inbox and i’ll answer them asap!

a/n: sorry this is late! i forgot the episode was released yesterday welp but tbh saturday night is probably gonna be my upload day anyway 

start time: 10:42 am 

my internet is experiencing problems woooooo so this will be interesting 

so many goddamn ads 

wait who’s the team who were playing like instruments and shit??? they sounded AWESOME

oh damn recap of zyx being pissed off 

MILK ADS 

that chewing gum is actually pretty good ngl 

also the theme song is getting catchier so don’t be surprised if i start liking it 

i still feel so bad for the kids who are sitting out IN THE COLD 

[break while my internet decides if it wants to continue being an asshole]

MC JIN YOU’RE HILARIOUS I LOVE YOU 

‘if you’re a rapper, PLEASE LEAVE’ i’m dead 

zhang pd is sighing lmao 

chen si jian leggo 

IT’S A RAPPER I’M CRYING AHAHAHHAHAAH 

*awkward silence* 

he’s shaking omfg poor baby 

also minghao is really cute ily i never said it before 

HE WROTE THAT?? oof you got talent boy 

he got a zyx serious nod 

wtf he was so quiet??? and now he’s just rapping the shit out of this song 

HE CAN SING YES YOU GO BABE 

oh damn those lyrics 

is it an A? i saw in the description there might be an A today 

IT’S A B YOU GO SWEETHEART 

IT’S THE SMILER FROM LAST EPISODE 

i love their suits 

LI ZHENNING BABE YOUR SMILE 

black pearl i’m crying his skin is GORGEOUS 

HIS POUT 

ALL OF THEIR SMILES ARE SO BEAUTIFUL 

zyx and mc jin talking about shi mingze being similar to kris wu 

LOOK AT ZYX’S FACE MY EXO FEELS 

he looks like my uncle I SPIT MY WATER OUT LMFAO 

jia yi’s CLAPPING I AM IN LOVE 

THAT ENTRANCE 

HIP WIGGLING I LOVE IT 

the song was damn good 

mc jin lmfao HIS SOUNDS 

even the trainees know that their bets on other trainees’ grades are probably gonna be wrong lol 

YOU’VE SCARED THEM ZHANG PD 

jia yi why are you so fcking cute 

NO ONE IN C EITHER 

well their prediction wasn’t wrong they said all of them would be D together 

but :( i really liked their perf 

HE WANTS TO GO ON STAGE JUST TO SEE ZHANG PD 

what a precious bub i shall protect 

stretchy bendy boi

xu long han uwu 

WAIT 

HE WAS THE ONE WHO CALLED ZYX A DIMPLE LIAR 

AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH 

[pls excuse as my wifi loads again]

LI RONGHAO NOT UNDERSTANDING THE JOKE 

i actually love him 

oh jesus this song brings back the memories lmfao 

THIS KID IS FCKING HILARIOUS I LOVE HIM 

stretchy bendy boi again woooooo 

I’M CRYING HE’S SO FUNNY I LOVE HIM MUM 

we already knew he was F but still ;; 

YOU MADE A GOOD IMPRESSION THOUGH GORGEOUS ILY 

YAO MINGMING ILY HE’S SO CUTE 

LOOK AT HOW ADORABLE ALSKDJALSD

6 years as a trainee damn boi 

oh shit 

how is being this good at dancing fair holy goddamn 

THEY CAN SING TOO WTF THIS IS NOT FAIR 

[wifi cut off again so guess what i GET TO WATCH THE PERF AGAIN] 

zyx has his serious face on 

wait they just got up from that position WITHOUT THEIR HANDS 

HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE

uh oh they ain’t getting As or Bs 

A C AND A D NOOOO 

okay i agree with his comments but c’mon they were nervous 

don’t worry babes you have plenty of time to improve! ;;; 

zhou shi yuan oh god i need to remember names 

HE DOES BIOMEDICINE?? DAMN BOI 

deep voice holy shit damn 

VOCALS VOCALS VOCALS 

omg so many vocals today 

BROMANCING ALREADY SHARING MILK 

okay that sounds weird 

THE BOY HE CHEERS AT EVERYONE WHO IS HE 

others: :| 

this boi: :O

omfg he’s a fcking meme too 

[paused while my mother makes me watch a David Attenborough documentary on bamboo] 

MAVERICKS LET’S GO 

MR X’S SONG WHOOP WHOOO 

IDOL PROD S1 FEELS LEGGO 

IT’S ACAPELLA HOLY SHIT LET’S GO 

vocals damn holy shit 

okay the dancing may not be as on point because there was a bit where they weren’t doing anything 

BUT I STILL LIKE THEIR VOCALS 

YAO CHI WHAT THE 

WE HAVE A B BABES 

GUAN YUE FINALLY 

MY BEAUTIFUL SMILING BABY BOY I’VE MISSED YOU 

even yixing is in love with his smile i can tell 

those sharp dance moves though 

I LOVE GUAN YUE GUYS 

honestly that was my favourite performance i don’t care what other people say 

it’s probably gonna be a B 

even though i want him to get an A 

LIAN HUAI WEI MY FAVOURITE BUB 

li wenhan holy shit you are fcking adorable 

YUEHUA LET’S GOOOOO

he forgot to bow WHAT A CUTIE 

LI WENHAN BEING A LEADER I LOVE 

babe don’t say you don’t want an F because zyx can sense fear and he’s gonna give you one 

i’M PRAYING FOR YOU ALREADY 

wenhan is such a soft boy omg 

JIAYOU BABES I’M ROOTING FOR YOU 

oh goddamn these slow mo shots are killing me 

OOF WENHAN GAVE ME A LOOK 

picking up the rose petals I AM DEAD 

guys i still really love jolin she smiled at me and i just forgot about my love for all the others 

jks li wenhan is singing at me now 

i want him to get an A but my bet is on a B 

NO Fs OR Ds WE DOING GOOD 

hu chun yang is really cute just saying 

told y’all so 

even though i wanted him to get an A

YES IT’S THE BAND HOLY SHIT 

THIS WAS SUPER GOOD IN THE PREVIEW 

oof i love it i love it i love it 

probs not gonna get the results i want them to get but WHO CARES I’M STANNING 

all Cs i can deal with that 

LIKE MY DAD POOR LI RONGHAO

i really like this guy’s suit 

wait i forgot his name 

i’ll wait till zyx says it again lmfao 

ZHANG PD SAYS HE’S HANDSOME 

chen you wei THAT’S HIS NAME 

HE GOT AN F WHAT 

oh here we go gramarie

okay i gotta say gramarie is really good at picking songs 

like last year it was a really good song too 

when are we getting an A 

the accents are so cute AHAHAHAHA 

zyx is losing his shit 

i missed their names though and their company 

there aren’t any left????

are there seriously no As?

oh damn 

i just noticed that the new trainee clothes are from new balance 

I AM CRYING FROM LAUGHTER 

such a good reference to ‘balance’ 

they’re really not going to give zyx a break lmfao 

theme song practice leggo

IT’S THE SM PRACTICE ROOM 

MY SM FAMILY FEELS 

i really do love the new uniforms 

THE DORMS 

WE’VE MISSED YOU 

bruh the gifts are better than last year 

wenhan you’re adorable omg i’ve said this so many times 

SOMEONE HAS A YODA AHAHAHHA

XU MINGHAO YOU’RE A GORGEOUS BOI 

and you’re a cutie too 

he speaks so softly too ugh ily 

lmfao their hands look like jellyfish ngl 

but damn xu minghao you’re a good teacher 

wang jiayi ;;; working when everyone left already 

ngl i’m not feeling the broship like last season where people would go out of their way to help each other 

he’s literally by himself and it’s nearly 6am 

jesus this boy is hard working 

LMAO once one person comes in everyone comes in ahahhahha

okay okay previews here we come 

wait removing the centre decision 

TO WHAT

oh damn future stages what a look 

I LIKE 

sidenote: i took a ss of this beautiful boy but forgot where i was going to put it so i’m gonna leave it here anyways. enjoy :)

finish time: 9:47 pm 

that’s all folks; tune in next week for another episode of mai’s shitposting whilst we suffer through another survival show together!

#i'm actually continuing this WOOO #idol producernet #idol producer #idol producer s2 #qing chun you ni #青春有你 #mai shit posts #idol producer s2e2 #series: ip s2 thoughts #text posts

[briteboy]

(circumstantial name by @earnoodle)

IT’S FINALLY TIME FOR THE POST YOU’VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR (or maybe just that one anon)

there’s a LOT in here, newer questions are generally first so if you asked something a while ago and you’re only interested in that, scroll towards the bottom. also doing wcifs separately (errr i’m gonna try my hardest to ok don’t crucify me)

this mass anons post includes topics ranging from Very Sweet Things Said To Me That I Don’t Deserve, nitpicking stranger things, crying over ramona, lou theories, Cillian Is A Fucking Creep theories (true), and completely unhelpful reshade advice

let’s f0cking do this

You're right, apart from carrying his stupid brain, Santi's head didn't do anything to any of us. I apologize for anon.

I'm pretty sure I said that already but I love Rooney and Santi's relationship so much I literally have no words for it

ME TOO LIKE IT’S JUST SO PURE TWO NOT-KIDS SCARED OF THE ADULT WORLD TRYING TO FIGURE THINGS OUT WITH THEIR WEIRD BRAINS TOGETHER ;__; i love them

YO i didnt know u were a demigirl!! im a demiboy nb Buddies

hell fuckin yeah dude!! we are starting a demi club

Ok but like I really want werewolves. Like I know it sounds stupid but we have vampire and while yes I love my bat babes, I want a giant pupper friend. I have story written out and plans for a cabin to build. Now I’m waiting for EA to give me my big hairy babes.

DUDE i want more supernatural stuff too, mostly witches like I NEED MY WITCHES AGAIN!!! ts3 witches were so good. i didn’t like ts3 werewolves much but i feel like they’d be super cool in ts4, knowing how the vampires came out. i NEED it

hihi! i've been very quietly (??) following your blog for some time now and i just fawn over your characters way too much ?? anywho, i've been wanting to start my own little simblr story but ,, i'm not entirely sure where to even start? i have so many stories that i'd love to get out there, and i have the means.. butt, how did you go about starting out?? so sorry this is so long but i look up to you a whole ton!!! ty ily! :-)

i’m the (??) lmao that’s me always but ahdhghdfkshg thank you so much!!!!! i’m so glad you love them, it means the world to me ;-; and listen, that was me, i had no idea how i was going to do it because i’d only seen ts3 stories up to that point and i thought there was like a set Way to tell stories but i had no idea what i was doing so i was like y’know what...i’m just gonna do it how i feel comfortable doing it and i’m gonna figure it out as i go along. so honestly try to roughly plan out what your stor(ies) will entail and if you get stuck on planning and can’t figure it out, just jump right into it, try to make a few scenes or get the ball rolling somehow, even if it’s just random posts (i mean that’s all my blog was until i decided to commit to santi’s story.) it’s always gonna feel weird and awkward at first, but you’ll get comfortable the more you do it and it’ll figure itself out, trust me!

I read through most of your story posts the other day and now I’m rereading it again just to torture myself some more (and maybe catch up on some posts I may have missed). I honestly don’t think I’ve come across a sims story that’s so beautifully written & includes such evocative pictures as yours. I’m really at a loss for words, it’s all so stunning. & after a nearly two-month long creative block, it’s planted the smallest seed of inspiration in the back of my mind, so thank you for your art.

AHHHH AHSDHKGKDSJG WHAT!!!!! it’s always crazy hearing that 1) people actually care about my stuff, and 2) that it inspires them. like i really cannot believe that, stilL!! thank you so so much, i’m so happy you enjoyed it (as torturous as it was, lmao) it seriously warms my heart that you’re getting your groove back in the creative world, that means more to me than ANYTHING!! good luck with your art or whatever you decide to do with that inspiration!

 can i pls have your editing skill please and thank you

i owe most my editing at this point to reshade so honestly get reshade and u will probably become better than me

o added u on animal crossing and when you added me back i was so happy,, your little person is sooo adorable ((:

OMG!! thank you!! everyone’s person on there is adorable i cry i love them all so much i’m so mad tho it won’t let me add any more friends!!! it probably cuts off at like 100 friends or something STUPID

First of all, I love you. Secondly, I love your photos so much. I'm legit about to just ditch sims 3 for 4 now because of your amazing posts. 😖

LMFAO no but really THANK YOU I LOVE YOU!!! if you can manage playing both i admire u, i’ve invested too much time and effort into ts4 to ever fully go back to any other sims games tbh

The new patch made my game unplayable! I'm crying, I miss my doggos...

NOOOOO!!! hopefully by now you’ve found a fix, i’m prayin for u

long time listener, first time caller yoooo. i like everyone love your stories and your sim aesthetic so so so much and just tbh i was offended on your behalf about that ask from that person wanting to novelize your stories. like you were way too nice. this is your intellectual property and it's fucked up that someone would think it'd be okay to duplicate it as long as they used a different medium. this is prob a bad one to repost just wanted to you to know you're an awesome, singular voice

omfg lmao this is a radio show now *z100 voice* tellem why ya mad euhhh first of all i can’t believe someone even ASKED that, i’m in shock because like what this is so foreign to me. people want to write about MY characters WHAT! like that alone...takes a long time to process. and like i know i should say no but then i feel mean but they’re also my creations so like idk. it warms my heart that you feel so strongly and would stand up for me like that i’m cryin thank u for calling in i love u

I JUST FINISHED YOUR ENTIRE STORY AND I'M NOT OK WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE PUTTING ME THROUGH THAT SHIT IT'S AN EMOTIONAL ROLLER COASTER AND I FEEL LIKE YOU HAVE ABUSED MY (NON EXISTENT) INNOCENCE WOW

I’M SO SORRY U HAD TO GO THROUGH THAT ALSO I APOLOGIZE FOR STEALING YOUR INNOCENCE I NEVER MEANT FOR THIS TO HAPPEN OSDAFKJDSK BUT THANK YOU FOR READING I’M GLAD YOU ENJOYED IT EVEN IF IT HURT YOU!!!

I've been up all night and it's now 11am. I'm completely binging on your stories bc I am in LOVE and need a Molly in my game asap. Do you think you'll ever upload her?

omG my freaking story inciting insomnia i’m so sorry for ur sleep schedule first of all, but at least that makes you identify with santi even more omg tho ;___; (how many times will i say ‘omg’ i wonder) i don’t think so because she is so dear to me and makes my heart ache, she is just so special, i dunno if i could ever release her into the wild like that lmao. i haven’t even shared her with my friends (not that i really ever had a reason to) but like yeah. maybe in the future that’ll change but right now, no, i’m sorry <3

To change the topic: Idk if you watch stranger things but I only managed to get to episode 3 of season 2 before I stopped watching lmao it was so bad and Billy (a certified Cunt) ruined the whole show for me

YEAH I DID! omg. i have a LOT of issues with this season (mostly in how badly they tried to retcon nancy and everyone else not caring about barb’s death, how bad the writing was in the realm of nancy and steve breaking up and then her and jonathan getting together...holy fuck it was so uncomfortable with that 40 yr old conspiracy theorist guy i couldn’t even enjoy my ship getting together lmao) also ur right, max and billy honestly did not offer anything to the story...like i loved max too but what was the point...billy acted like their presence and the reason they had to move was so dramatic when it was really nothing...unless they’re saving that for season 3 but like. the whole situation with billy was so anticlimactic. he was like a walmart version of henry from IT. like boohoo ur dad’s an asshole and then he beat up steve. good character arc. i liked max standing up for herself but really...that whole thing was so lackluster, i didn’t care about it at all. ALSO I HATED THAT THEY DIDN’T LET MAX AND ELEVEN BE FRIENDS!! i’m sure it’ll happen in season 3 but like c’mon...that would’ve made the max character feel a little more important to the story. anyway yeah fuck billy and i don’t get why everyone is lusting after him or his actor they’re both ugly! thanks for listening

I just got the sims 4 + city living and I’m so excited! I was really inspired by your stories and style in general... I was wondering what packs do you have and also what are your favourite sims 4 hairs? I’m having trouble finding ones and I love your style!

YAY I’M EXCITED FOR YOU!!! omg aww it warms my heart so much when people say i inspire them because i never anticipated that kind of response, thank you so much <3 hmmm i think i have all of them except glamour stuff and fitness stuff. and pretty much all the hairs i download are here or here. (or the subsequent ‘tf’, ‘cf’, ‘tm’ and ‘cm’ tags as well, according to age)

UHM a 19 year old and a 13 year old? Poor baby Lou... Also youre a brilliant writer i cant

😬😬😬  stay tuned ajasdhjhjsahd thank you so much!!!

My stan levels for you have increased so much? like thanks for being a good ally, clAps for femmesim!

lmao thank you, i don’t really deserve praise tho i’m just passing on the knowledge of those patient enough to teach me. just trying to do what i can with my privilege u know. ily

How do you have teeth showing in so many of your pictures of Lou and Molly, do you PS them in?

i’ve gotten this question before and it’s usually just the poses used! i do have some lipsticks that have teeth on them but i mostly use them for just rooney.

Honestly, a fight between Santi and that new guy (srry, forgot his name while typing this) would be so hot. Like, I hope Santi would win but like just watching Santi fight him for Lou would make me happy!! Also, I live for your stories💞

omG i’m about to call up vince mcmahon they both need to fight on smackdown it’s gonna happen. they’ll both be shirtless too ok and THANK YOU ILY

boi poc can be PREJUDICED against white people but there is no such thing as reverse racIIIIIIiiiiIIIIIiiiIIIIsm

Lemme just say that you must be feeling so stressed rn. I love you and your simblr!!! Your posts light up my day!! <3333

OMg kind of. this week has taken A Lot out of me and i really just want to chill at home and play my freaking GAME but obligations. u know. here’s hoping i get a day off this week. i’m mad i’m probably gonna miss gianni’s birthday too (it’s on tuesday) and i wanted to do something for it!! i’ll probably do it late like i did last year too lmao i’m so sorry baby g ANYWAY u didn’t ask to hear about any of this...thank you for this sweet message i love you <3

why,,,, are people... coming to your blog to discuss race you are a fucking simblr WHAT

the real question is why do people go to you like its your job to educate them lmao like theres so many resources out there

SHAWDY u aint wrong reverse racism is literally a joke i am so sorry you have to go through all of this keep stepping on white feelings we deserve it

I was wondering would u consider Asians to be POC?

yes

I just finished Strange the Dreamer and it was fucking amazing. I cried so much and I laughed and I sat in absolute amazement at the world Laini Taylor has created. 100/10 would recommend

ahhhh i really need to read it apparently!! i’m like 10% away from being done with a dance with dragons (and then i have to wait for the next book like a peasant HURRY UP KING GEORGE) anyway this one is definitely on my list!

omgomg!! I just met this girl in my class who has eyes just like ramona's!!! But like instead of being brown w/ a little bit of blue, they were blue w/ a little bit of brown!!! Dude I was so shook I rlly didn't think ppl had eyes like that!

OMG!!!! that’s amazing! and yes heterochromia is a real thing haha. i’ve only met one person with it and he had the same color combo as ramona too, only his was full heterochromia, not sectoral.

*me in the background screaming* nO yOU LEAVE HER ALoNE baD-DAD-MaN!

ME TF TOO

every time i read some of your stories i get an ache in my heart that doesn't go away until i either cry or sleep so interpret that as you like

OMG ;_____; ok me too tho my heart literally hurts thinking about my characters sometimes...mostly santi...i hate him (no i don’t :{ )

hey uhh idk if you've answered something like this before but do you have a spotify or something bc your music taste is GOLD

THANK YOU!! you were the first person to ask about this haha and hopefully you saw my answer to the other question about it! i just made one and it’s here!

hi hi ! i’m seeing all the drama on da blog and i really want to read the whole story but i can’t get to it on mobile so i was wondering if you could link the beginning and tell me what the best order to read it in is ( i’m so confused because i’ve seen sm people y’all about a parallel story so idk if i’m being dumb !! ) i hope this isn’t any inconvenience also your sims are so beautiful sjajsjajs

hey on mobile the link is just: http://femmesim.tumblr.com/tagged/story/chrono i would honestly just recommend that order haha, it makes things simpler and it encompasses ALL story posts, or posts that give context. there are parallels in my story, lou’s is kind of a parallel of santi’s, only different...well...you’ll see. but yeah sorry this is so late! and thank you!!!

TU HISTORIA ES TAAAAAN BUENA POR DIOOOOS (YOURE STORY IS SOOOOO GOOD OMG) <3 <3 *OO* *cries in spanish*

MUCHAS GRACIAS ENCANTADORA PERSONAAAA <333

lou is wendy right? i mean, a wendy complex is someone who is overly mothering to partners, and lou is already a mother and ik that doesn't really count as foreshadowing but it seems like it could be a link to me. it'd make sense too, considering guys that go after younger girls (ew) are usually immature ie peter pan complex. it'd make the most sense that those two go together then.

heheheheh that is a VERY good observation...that’s all i’m gonna say!!

This has nothing to do with what's happening in the story rn, but whatever. I was wondering if you were going to mention lou's struggles with being a single mom and the stigma surrounding single motherhood? As a single mother myself I'd really enjoy seeing you take on the issue. Personally, my biggest problem was overcoming the generalizations people put on you when you're a single mom. People always assumed that I that I was stupid and uneducated because I had my son when I was 17.

yes! that will definitely come up. i will focus a lot on her struggles as a single mom. so far i’ve mostly just peppered in some stuff about money troubles, and that will come up again, and the issues you mention will be pretty central to her character as well. i’m sorry you have to endure that, it’s not fair. people don’t even realize how strong and dedicated single mothers are.

when you say Peter Pan, do you mean the Disney stuff or the og creepy stuff?

i mean the general themes of the story and how that translates into a peter pan complex: boy who never grows up, feels like he fits in more with younger people (haha...yikes), read the message above because that anon described the other half of the equation better than i could

Wait, hold up. That dude is cute but I feel like he’s coming onto Lou way too strong. I have a bad feeling.. Lou is like 13 there and he is 19 I mean I’ve seen bigger gaps between people, but she is not legal yet.. Where are you going with this? 🤨😅

yyyyyyep that feeling is warranted! i am going a way i don’t think you guys expect me to go...i think you’ll be very confused at the end of this part lmao. that being said, i’m not putting any of this in for shock value or to romanticize inappropriate relationships like this. (i’m probably going to be repeating that a LOT for this story but please just keep that in mind)

Hey mom wanna hear a fun as hell story? I just got back from the ER bc I fell on my razor after showering, and practically cut my nipple in half. (I am in so much pain hELP)

OMFG NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOUR POOR NIPPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’M SO SORRY I HOPE IT FEELS BETTER PLEASE UPDATE ME ON THE NIPPLE STATUS

U gotta watch sense8!!! Apart from the v awkward sex scenes it's v good, has a lot of representation and shit Just watch that shit show, u won't regret it (And if you do I cut your throat oops)

i’ve heard it’s good! i remember when it first came out and everyone was like Wow The Representation so honestly anything with diversity has already got me hooked pls don’t murder me.

I'm calling it now. He's Fi's dad. and he's a FUCKING CREEP!! Bitch you are 19!! LOU IS 13!! BACK THE FUCK OFF YOU PERV!!

no spoilers or anything but honestly i’m with you @ cillian die

Are they gonna fucc, o no

right now? no. that would be Very Bad

bABY ITS COLD OUTSIDE

oh same

Hi ! Your lastest edit (graveyard girl) is truly amazing, how did you make that bokeh behind her ? 😱😍

thank you so much!!! it’s reshade (with matso DOF)!

You've probably got this question a lot of times but i can't find the answer for it. What reshade do you use?

i gotta add this to my faq, it’s one i created myself but i started out with this one (it totally doesn’t resemble that one anymore but i think it’s a good starting point)

how do you make good looking male sims? mine always look the same and kinda girly..

hmmm longer faces, prominent chins and jaws, smaller eyes, bigger noses...generally yeah

What do you mean 9 + alt?

you gotta turn bb.moveobjects on and then press alt + 9 when an object is selected to move it upward. so what i did with those poses i made was, i selected a teleporter and pressed alt + 9 until it was at a spot i liked on the roof. that’s why releasing those poses would be tricky, ‘cause every build is different so there’s no set way to place them, you just kinda have to play around with them

You mentioned GoT so naturally, I have to chime in and express my love for Jon. Honestly, he won me over ever since the first season? I'm at season 5 now and people have already warned me so now i'm silently weeping, waiting for something to happen to my precious bby help

JONNY BOY!!!!!!!!!!! i loved his emo ass since the beginning but his arc with qorin halfhand (was he in the show??) was probably the best arc in book 2 and then his book 3 arc was just...SO GOOD, SO MUCH happens to him and i just felt like i was watching my son go through it all...i love that boy so much ;-; i’m almost at the end of the last book and i’m scared for him because of the one spoiler i know lmao and you’re at that point too so GET READY we’ll go through it together ok

So there's this game I'm playing where someone talking about another character says 'maybe you can break him from his ouroboros of self-fladulation' (I know I probably butchered those spellings but I'm not a bright egg and autocorrect isn't helping rip) and tbh it made me think of Santi. (Also I'mma scream of you get this reference jsyk)

OMG THE FACT THAT YOU THOUGHT OF HIM ;-; and it’s okay u are the brightest egg in the bunch to me. I’M SORRY I DON’T GET THIS REFERENCE BECAUSE I’M NOT A VIDEO GAME PERSON BUT I’LL PRETEND I DO KNOW WHAT UR TALKING ABOUT anyway yes santi is currently in the process of breaking his self-flagellation and embracing the oneness of the ouroboros (as opposed to letting the cycle repeat itself until he’s worn down to nothing)

do you have any favorite pose creators?

answered

do you have any tips for taking good screenshots in game? like how to get the good angles and good quality? i play on ultra but i think when i zoom in and then use the arrows on my keyboard to move around, the pictures gets less clear and looks kinda blurry. how should i do this?

well if you’re already using ultra, there’s not much you can do lmao. sims 4 is just bad with textures in general. it also depends on the objects as well, some are better quality than others. if i zoom in far on a sim’s face, i generally know there will be some pixelation and i can clean that up in photoshop with topaz clean and the smudge tool. i am very reliant on photoshop sometimes lmao. it sounds like you already have the basics of taking good screenshots, it’s just sometimes you have to fight and work with sims 4′s less-than-hd quality.

burn it down by daughter reminds me of santi & i'm in pain

ouroboros!!! death! birth! death again! birth again rinse repeat! also santi breaking the cycle because third time's the charm

The tattoo is an Ouroboros. It originated in Egyptian iconography, and it symbolizes recreation. My boy's recreating himself, I'm so proud.

ouroboros, the dragon eating its own tail. it's a sign of eternal renewal

i saw the post of child molly and just started BAWLING i miss her what the fuck she's my fave character i'M CRYING

ME TOO BICH!! ME FUCKIN TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i just read all of A Serious Case Of The Novembers so far and theres still tears on my face. some of the best stuff ive read in a while, great job on everything

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!! ALSO I’M SORRY FOR MAKING YOU CRY

every time you write about molly and her in heaven it makes my heart swell, like the characters were answering asks and someone asked her what heaven was like and even though it was so small short lil answer it still pulls at the heart strings, basically what im trying to say is that your writing is so good! <3

omg ;_______; me too, i feel like she has such a simple way with words and although her descriptions of heaven are brief, they are also complex and beautiful, and even just writing it chokes me up ;-; thank you so much tho i’m so glad you like it!!

Molly: out Molly tatto: also out

why did this remind me of this post:

How did you edit in the fire in the last post? Looks cool

i searched things like “bonfire” and pasted parts of it that i wanted on the pic to make it look more realistic, then put a layer mask on the pasted pic and erased the edges and stuff to make it blend in better. the sparks and stuff i added by pasting it onto a new layer and changing the blending mode to screen! 

idk if you have every watched grey anatomy but Lou's backstory is starting to remind me of Jo (Jo is a character from the show) like Jo was in a abusive relationship and she is married to the guy but she cant get divorced or he will come and find her. So like if Lou didn't tell Fiona's dad he was a dad and Lou was married to him and cant escape the marriage (cause abuse), plus it would explain Lou's kink with being choked ;) full circle *god-like heaven music with tiniest violin is playing now*

ooh no i don’t but that’s interesting and i’m excited you even made a connection like that! i will say that it’s not lou who likes to be choked (the very opposite actually lmao) but otherwise the situation does kinda fit. i’m the violin

I have a freakin bio pre ap test tomorrow on photosynthesis and i have no idea what it is im going to fail save me

I’M ANSWERING THIS VERY LATE BUT I HOPE YOUR TEST WENT WELL!!!!!! *spongebob voice* photosynthesis

last time I installed reshade I couldn't get it to open the controls or shaders or anything in game :///// any tips?? I love they way reshade looks too!!

hmmmmm well i know the control panel opens when you press shift + f2, and then you check the boxes of the effects you want on them. i haven’t heard of this problem so i dunno what other advice to give i’m sorry :{ if it’s your first time installing it, you might have to wait a little to get it to load up.

Da puppy is so cute!!!

That dog and Romona are so adorable, I might cry

Ramona's cheeks are so big im in love

NAJKSDJGKJSD THANK YOU i love her and her chubby cheeks ;-;

OMG TOTORO IS SO BEAUTIFUL I LOVE GHIBLI UGH FKSJFJANFB

SAME!!!!!!! if i could only watch ghibli movies for the rest of my life i’d be totally fine with that

THE DOGGIE HAS EYES JUST LIKE RAMONAS IM GONNA FUCKIGN CRY

ME FUCKGN TOO!!!!!!!!!! it was fate (aka me creating the wolf pup to look just like her shh i am fate)

Hope I'm not bothering you but i wondered if you knew how to make Tamo sims eyebags work on a toddler? Do I just click in s4s to work for toddler on the "age and gender flags" when looking in My CC or do I have to do something a little more than that please? Thank you.

for any skin detail or makeup, you have to go into s4s and open the package up, go to one of the tabs (honestly i don’t remember which one because i don’t have it open rn lmao) and you’ll see the different age groups and you check the box for toddler. and then save it of course. (there’s probably a better guide on how to do this somewhere lmao)

Hey :) Sorry to take up your time, I was wondering if you use win7, win8 or win10? I'm trying to decide on one and people seem to have very strong feelings about it. Also what web browser do you use? I've used Firefox, but I had some problems on CC websites. Thanks<3

i use windows 10 because it came with my laptop lmao i honestly don’t know much about windows systems at all!! and i use google chrome because it’s never failed me (even though windows keeps pressuring me to use the new internet explorer called “edge”)

i just finished all of novembers in a sitting and 1. i'm Sobbing, 2. your music taste is bomb

THANK YOU!!! my music taste is like one part indie shit, one part rap and hip-hop, twelve parts emo middle school bands

what is the size of the original unedited screenshot?

1920x1080

For reshade when your first install and select the reshade you want to use do you have to edit the settings? Cause last time I tried to (I didn’t know what most of the things meant lmao) but it kept saying error or something so I couldn’t play the game so I ended up taking out reshade

do you mean the preset you want to use? i mean no you can just play with that preset, you don’t have to change anything about it. i’m not sure what you mean but i followed this guide for setting it up

Will you ever share your preset?? Or maybe a preset made be you??

i’ve answered this before but the answer is Maybe

Hi!!!! How do you make the rays of light you have in your photos?? THANK U BBY <3333

that’s actually in my editing tutorial but here you go <3

is reshade only available on windows + do we need to pay for it

yes and no

Hello love! I was wondering (and maybe it's a dumb question, idk) but what life span setting do you use? I would assume you turned off aging for your story but maybe I'm wrong ;w; Thank you!!

i do actually have aging off ‘cause i’m a coward lmao even in the ts3 days when i wasn’t doing story stuff and literally just playing i had it off for the most part and just aged sims up when i wanted because i like to be in control of Everything (aries)

I really just wanted to say that I’m new I your tumblr but your stories are amazing and I love them so much!!! Keep doing what you’re doing💞👏🏼

hey thank you!!! you are so kind and i’m glad you’re enjoying everything!!

In your reshade settings where have you set it to save your SS's to and which key please? I can't find mine after setting it to desktop/screenshots :(

i just set mine to ts4′s screenshots folder because it’s what i was used to and it works for me haha. hmmmmmm did you copy the exact address or whatever it’s called of your folder’s location and then paste it into the reshade box? try doing that with another location and see if it works. if anything you can do what i did ‘cause it worked for me 

ok SO i came across this music video for this like spanish/english speaking indie band called The Marías and the song was déjate llevar and literally everything about the music video reminded me of rooney and gianni

OMMMGGG i love this so much, i cry @ music suggestions and this is so them ;-; i think i’ve heard of this band before actually!!

a little life is going to fucking ruin you,,, just a warning

great! i look forward to it

can a steal ur talent

have it i don’t need it

What app are you using to make them cool edit things??

i tagged it but it was doodle face

omg Strange the Dreamer is so freaking amazing! It’s literally one of my favorite books of all time; You’ll love it. The writing is absolutely delightful

you guys are really singin the praises for this book!! i have so many dang books to read i swear

#nonsims #saviorhide #anonymous #sunny answers #it is done and i never want to see another anon message again #i retire

[ineverhadmyinternetphase]

Running Into You - No. 6

Installment number 6 in my series of AU oneshots about Dan meeting his favourite youtuber AmazingPhil for the first time.

AO3 link

Genre: Fluff, with a sort of 2009-ish feel (but it’s still AU)

Warnings: A bit of swearing and some mentions of low self-esteem but literally it’s just fluff

Prompt: Missent Text

Summary: Dan’s on his gap year, so naturally he’s spending most of his time lounging around on the internet, watching his favourite youtubers and scrolling through tumblr. When he gets an accidental text from an unknown number, he doesn’t think much of it, until a series of events start to convince him the sender might just be someone he idolises: AmazingPhil.

A/N: This draft is like 2 years old, but @agingphangirl convinced me to post this while we’re waiting for pinof. It’s epistolary form, so I hope it isn’t too confusing. Hope you like it ^_^

Phil’s texts are italics, Dan’s texts are in quotation marks

…

6. Missent Text

Where r u?

Sorry what?

Where r u I’ve been here 10 mins

…Am I supposed to be somewhere?

You said on dm you’d be here at 6, I’m getting cold ^_^

Um I’m sorry mate but you must have the wrong number

Oh crap!! Sorry!!

.Lmao it’s ok. Just checked my dms and nothing interesting enough to make me be outside in this weather sorry

Tell me about it x_x I’m freezing. But if you’re not peej then I’ll be here a while

Unfortunately for you I go by Dan

Oh. Well, hello Dan. Sorry for bothering you with my freezing antics

Nvm it’s cool

It’s more than COOL, it’s COLD enough for ICICLES

I’m sure ur exaggerating

No my nose is an actual block of ice

Where even are you? Unless you’re in the Arctic you might want to get that seen to

--

Sorry! Peej showed up eventually (the friend I thought you were). Turns out he gave me the wrong number. All sorted now. I promise not to bother you again

Honestly it’s fine. I probably need more human contact so you did me a favour

Haha, glad to be of service ^_^ also I was in Manchester. It’s so cold it snowed. My icicle nose is allowed

Manchester? That’s like waaaaay in the north

Not that far but cold enough for icicle noses :P

Yes yes ok you’re allowed an icicle nose

Haha thanks :P so where are you, if not in the north?

Reading

Ohhhh so a proper southerner

I guess you could say that

Well hello Dan the proper southerner

God no that makes me sound like a queens guard or something

Do you queens guard people have time to text?

We’re too busy dealing with the corgis and all that shit

I knew it 0.o

XD but really I’m sitting in bed on the internet lol

Actually same

Haha really?

Yep. Which sites you on?

Just the usual. Tumblr, YouTube. My favourite youtuber has a new video due out tonight

Nice ^_^

What sites are you on?

Currently uploading a video to my YouTube channel

You have a channel?!

Haha yeah ^_^

Which one? Would I know it?

I don’t know. It isn’t a huge deal but it’s fun

Yeah I mean I admire that. I’d love to have a channel

Why don’t you?

Idk too scared I guess

Awr ^_^ nothing to be scared about honest, it’s just you and a camera

And the whole of the internet xD

Haha I try not to think about that part 0.o thousands of people watching me

Thousands? Wow so you must be a pretty big channel

Heh I guess, maybe ^_^ so who are your favourite youtubers?

Oh man I have loads XD Smosh, community channel, AmazingPhil (the one I’m waiting for the new video), charlieissocoollike

That’s a good mix ^_^ my new video is 99% uploaded and stuck there x_x

Seriously? Your connection needs to sort its shit out

Haha yeah it really does. I think it’s being attacked by bees

Bees?

Or wasps

Seriously?

Tiny horned beetles?

Do they even exist?

Idk but if they do they’re attacking my wifi

I’ll send the insect spray

Haha thanks XD it must have worked as my video is finally uploaded!

—

…Great video. Especially the lion wedding, that was sweet

Haha thanks! Glad you liked it, took ages to get the dress on lioness. Plus my mum nearly walked in on me 0.o

Holy fuck you actually are AmazingPhil aren’t you

Um, well, yes.

Sorry.

AmazingPhil, FantasticPhil, Epic Youtuber

or just Phil if you prefer

I probably should have told you

Jesus shitting fuck I’m sorry for bothering you

Don’t be daft! I accidentally texted you first ^_^

Yeah but I bet you didn’t expect to end up with a weird fanboy. Um. Not that I’m a stalker I promise

Haha it’s ok Dan honestly

I’m not going to spread your number around or anything holy shit like I’m so sorry

Honestly, please don’t worry, it’s been nice talking to you ^_^ I appreciate you not spreading my number around though. I got lucky with you, don’t want to risk a creepy stalker finding me 0.o

Lmao I promise xD how do you know for sure I’m not a creepy stalker though

0.o I’ll set the bees against you

I’ll start running now

Haha

—

So out of curiosity how long have you been watching my videos for?

Oh um a couple of years now

Really? That’s awesome!

Yeah. You actually replied to one of my comments once ^_^ made my day

Aw haha that’s great, which video?

The toxic one

Oh my god >.<

Haha it’s a good video :P

I should remove it from the internet immediately

Don’t you dare! Your fans would be sad

X_x well this isn’t very fair if you know about me but I don’t know you at all

Well you know my name’s Dan

And you’re from Reading. Tell me more? ^_^

unless you don’t want to, that’s fine, I’m just curious

Haha no it’s alright. Um. I’m Dan. I just finished my A levels and now I’m taking a gap year

Oh cool ^_^ going to uni after that?

Probably. Thinking of law

Wow, that’s impressive

Haha we’ll see ^_^

Just checking but how old are you? I don’t want to be a creep 0.o

Lmao dw I’m 18 everything is legal

Phew XD Anything else I should know?

Well I’m currently undefeated at mario kart

What seriously? You’ve never lost?

Nope and I don’t plan to start :P

I’d beat you

I really wish we could test that theory

Haha that would be fun :P we could always test it over Skype sometime?

That’s probably really weird sorry

I promise I’m not a creeper

It’s ok, and yeah, I’d love to Skype sometime

Yeah? Yay! :D

Lmao you’re probably going to want to run a mile when you see me though

I doubt that very much unless you have like five eyes or something

Five eyes? Wtf XD

Idk you could be a giant spider

[insert pic] See? Not a giant spider :P

Oh wow yeah not a giant spider. I spy a cute guy :P

Shut up >.<

Nice hair

Lol I swear I had it like this before I started watching you

[insert pic] And here I thought I’d started a trend

Crap you actually are Phil >.< yeah your hair is cool enough to be a trendsetter tbh

Haha thanks XD and yeah I am Phil. Is that a problem?

Are you kidding me? Nope except I turn even more awkward than normal around people I admire

Aw well awkward people are the best. And at least there aren’t videos of you half-naked on the internet

You make a good point

—

Hey so I’m uploading a new video tonight but I can’t decide if it’s actually any good. Check it out for me?

Omfg are you seriously saying I get a sneak preview on an AmazingPhil video

Yes please ^_^ I might have overweirded. Need a second opinion

Omfg

just like

give me a moment

wtf

fucking hell

wow ok

I’m calm now

yes I would love to check your video for you

Haha thanks. It’s up as unlisted, [insert link] please be honest with me if it’s terrible

Wow man that’s awesome! I love how interactive it is!

Omfg seriously how are you this creative like you shouldn’t be allowed

Haha really? Wow thanks, I’m not sure about the shot angle though and the lighting is kinda terrible

Yeah ngl the lighting is bad but you can’t control the sun

You never know! I could be a weatherman. But you seriously think I should upload it?

[insert pic with thumbs up] totally I love it

Aw I forgot how hot you are. It’s going up tonight then

CUTE I MEANT CUTE

Gah I’m sorry

Haha it’s fine, getting called hot is never bad in my book ;)

Would you believe it was autocorrect?

Haha if you want :P sounds pretty unlikely though

I’m hiding in a pillow and never coming out

No! Then your subscribers will hate me for taking you away

[insert pic in a pillow] do you like my new home

XD don’t hide from me seriously like you have a video to upload

[insert pic] ok true it’s on 68%

Damn YouTube upload times

Tell me about it. Have you ever uploaded a video then?

Lmao there’s one of me being a boss at DDR

Yeah? Can I check it out?

>.< Um sure, I’m a lame nerd though

Dan, have you even met me?

Haha ok true :P [insert link] just don’t say I didn’t warn you

No one’s feet should be allowed to move that fast. You’re so good, I fall over whenever I try and play

Haha I could teach you

Please be my DDR master Dan-sensei

Depends what you give me :P

I’ve got Pokemon cards

I’m sold

—

[insert pikachu with a lion pic] this was too cute not to show you

Awwww! Rawr ^_^ where is that?

Shop called forbidden planet. I’m in London on work experience and went there on my break

0.o London? You’re braver than me, capital cities scare me

Aw poor Phil haha

[insert pic] do I look ready for work?

Very serious

Srs bsns

[insert scared face pic] I’ll take YouTube any day

Haha. Me too tbh. Law offices are big and dull

Why do you want to do it then?

Idk. Job security? Having a point in life?

Fair enough :P

You did English didn’t you? Sorry I swear I’m not a stalker

Haha it’s fine ^_^ and yeah, English language and linguistics. Then a masters in post-production

Wow that’s so cool. So you’re in your 20s?

22 ^_^ My masters is the only reason I know how to edit videos :P

I wish I could

Well I can always teach you

Seriously?!

Yeah of course, I reckon you’d be great at making videos

Really? Lmao I’m so awkward tho

That can work in your favour, trust me :P

Haha well if you say so, YouTube senpai

Listen well Dan-kun and you too will learn the ways of the YouTube

Haha you’re so strange

You’re just jealous

[insert pic] so much

Stop taking pics at work

But it’s so boring. At least send me one back, save me from the dullness

[insert pic] on my way to a meetup so might be a bit slow

Oh cool meetup like YouTube meetup?

I guess that must be fun

I’d love to go to one but too scared and awkward lol

Save me work is literally killing me

I can’t actually keep working here

ugh why did I ever think law was a good idea I’m going to die at uni

Whoops sorry I seem to have spammed your phone

—

Hey Dan, sorry! I forgot to bring my charger to the meetup so my phone has only just come back to me. I mourned it’s passing *plays lion king music*

Oh that’s ok

I really am sorry that I couldn’t distract you from your work

Lmao no worries

Don’t know if it’ll make it any better but I am working on a new video and lion says he thinks law is a very admirable career option

Tell lion thanks and I’d be even more grateful if he did my degree for me

He says sign him up where are you going to uni anyway?

Well I’m not there yet. I have to start applying soon

Looked around any?

Errrr I’ll get on that

Isn’t the deadline soon?

Yeah but I’m an epic procrastinator

Lion is very disappointed

Lion can suck my dick

Dan!

Lmao I was kidding

XD

besides you’re 18 you have loads of time to sort stuff out

Yeah but I have literally no idea what I’m doing

No one does. That’s why you go to uni - to figure it out

You seemed to have it all together

Haha thanks, but honestly, I was just making stupid videos in my bedroom

does that sound wrong?

Lmao a little yeah

Oops

Dw lol if you’re a sexual predator you’re a bit far away to do any real damage

True

:( I’d rather you were nearer tbh

Even if I’m a sexual predator?

Lol I don’t really think you are though

Well I’m not

And me too, Dan

—

[insert pic] last day at the office today I literally couldn’t be happier

Lol I can see from your face

[insert pic] is it that obvious

Rawr

I’ll send lioness to aid you

Lioness not lion?

She’s much fiercer

Lmao probs true either way I’ll take help

At least soon you’ll be free

Yeah I literally can’t wait

Gonna do something to celebrate? ^_^

Lol all my friends are at uni

[insert pic] well Lion and I are proud of you

Aw thanks ^_^ I still forget you’re AmazingPhil sometimes

I’m deeply offended

no but really I’m just Phil and you’re really cool

sorry

Na it’s fine I just had to work

Oops XD

I’m hiding out in the toilets now so we’re fine lmao

and I have no issues with you being Phil

I mean it could be worse at least you aren’t a creepy stalker

I hope not. Also uploading another video tonight, I think you’ll like it

!!! Best celebration ever

^_^

—

So I may have been stalking you on Twitter and it seems your birthday is soon?

0.o stalker. And yeah it is ^_^

wait you follow me? What’s your Twitter handle?

Um. Yes I follow you. And this is going to sound very awkward and stuff but I kind of want to send you a birthday present

Omg Dan you don’t have to do that

Well I’d kinda like to so :P should I use your PO box?

Nah that takes ages to check, I’ll give you my actual address

I promise not to hunt you down

Tbh if it’s you I wouldn’t even mind

Omg

[insert pic with address] there you go

Lol is that a bank statement?

Yeah I’m so profesh

Phil! I could literally rob you

Well I trust that you won’t :P

Lmao you’d better

What’s your Twitter handle btw? You never said

Uh its danisnotonfire.

But please don’t judge me oh god I’m such a nerd

Dan honestly you’re the coolest person I know

sorry was that a bit much?

No! I’m just struggling to respond to the best youtuber out there calling me cool

Not just cool, the coolest :P wow you’ve commented on my tweets quite a bit

>.<

Sorry I never noticed you properly

You accidentally texted me I think that wins

Haha true

—

Happy birthday!

Thanks! ^_^ I have family stuff but I’ll talk to you as soon as I’m done

Sure sure have a great day!

— DAN OMG

YOUR PRESENTS

YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE YOU ACTUALLY SHOULDN’T

[insert excited pic cuddling the presents] you’re amazing

you’re so amazing

I can’t believe you

honestly you’re too amazing

how did I ever meet someone this nice and funny and cool and kind and cute and sweet

honestly

and I know you must be sleeping it’s like 2am but I have to tell you

OMG you’re too adorable

who let you be like this and you’re too far away :(

I wish you could be here so I could give you a thank-you hug

Wow I’m glad you liked them :P I’ll take a thank-you hug

What are you doing still up?

Can’t sleep how was the party?

GR8 M8! My parents embarrassed me in front of everyone

Oh no what did they do?

Got the baby photos out >.<

Lmao I’d love to see that

I was ginger

OMG for real?!

Yes >.< *hides forever*

That’s adorable

You’re adorable

Your mum’s adorable

Actually shut up

:P aren’t you too old for immature arguments now

Go to sleep

Lmao I’m glad it was good though

Thanks yeah it was rly good

Looking through the photos now

Any good ones?

Mostly drunk XD [insert pic]

Who’s that guy?

My cousin

Lmao ok I was about to say hands off

XD he was really drunk

You look a bit worse for the wear too

I may be slightly intoxicated

Haha tut tut Lester

Shut up Dan :P what is your surname?

Howell

Howell? Like a wolf?

Lmao if you like

Awooooooo

You’re so strange XD

AwoloooooOooooOOOOO

it suits you though

you’re very brown

XD aren’t wolves grey?

Well yeah

but like

you have their wildness

Lmao I’m taking that as a compliment

You should

you’re hot as hell

but so young and sticky out

like a baby deer

A wolf and a baby deer?

And eyes like an owl

You and your animal metaphors

None of those are quite right though

Like your eyes are too pretty they’re more like the night sky

but coloured with earth

You’re drunk

I mean it though

…I know

I wish I had eyes like yours

No! Yours are perfect

They’re big and weird

They’re deep and beautiful and I could swim in them all day

and I’m not drunk

I should be sleeping

You’re sleep-drunk :P which is actually a thing you know

Right I’m going to sleep

Noooooooo

We’ll talk about this when we’re both more sane

But I don’t want you to go

it’s quiet and sad when you aren’t around

and I’m cold here now

and it’s my birthday

Dan?

Dan?

Happy birthday you idiot. Now go to sleep

night Dan <333

—

I’m so sorry about last night I had too much to drink

Haha it’s ok it was your birthday

Yeah but still

I’m so sorry if I made you uncomfortable

You didn’t. There’s nothing to worry about

Do we need to talk about this?

Um. Do you want to?

Kind of

But kind of not

I don’t want to make you feel awkward

I’m always awkward

Dan, for real. You know what I mean.

Yeah I think I do

Do we need to talk about it?

I think we’re both aware it’s there. Let’s just see where it goes?

Yeah ok sounds good. And no awkwardness?

None at all, I promise <3

Good <3

—

Hey Dan, are you still up for Skype at some point?

Yeah, sure ^_^ tonight?

Yeah! I’ll just finish up editing

Ooh, what’s it like?

Haha spoilers :P what’s your Skype name?

Danisnotonfire same as Twitter

Original :P

added you

‘AmazingPhil has added you to his contacts’ you’re just as original I see

Shut up and answer the call

—

So my eyes are even bluer on skype? :P

Haha shuddup

They’re even more blue in person

Are they even blue lmao they’re like 3 different colours

[insert pic] mostly blue

Greeny yellow blue

Very poetic

Shuddup :P

sorry I’ll stop

Please don’t

Lol fishing for compliments?

Well if they’re being offered

You’re impossible

That isn’t a compliment

You’re ridiculously strange?

I’ll take that

Haha of course you would :P

So what are you up to?

Actually answering a few texts for once, you?

Throwing around some video ideas but I’m bored now. Who’re you texting?

Some school friends who are at uni

Nice ^_^

Well. Sort of. It’s weird

Tell me about it?

It’s just they all have these lives that are moving forwards and away from home and leaving me behind

and I just

My ex is dating someone else and I’m in exactly the same place as I was when she broke up with me

And I’m not content but I don’t really want to go anywhere or do anything and I just don’t know what on earth I’m going to do with my life

Were you happy with them before school ended?

Idk. I thought so at the time. But I don’t think I’ve ever really been happy, not yet

It’s ok. You don’t have to know right now. And one day you’ll leave all of them behind too and move on to something better

I think I already am. Having you around is better than them

Sorry

Haha don’t apologise for being so sweet ^_^

Also I’m single now. And bi. Just to avoid confusion

I’m bi too. Probably

Probably?

Not a massive fan of labels if I’m honest

If I feel something for someone then that’s all that matters

Might be demi, might be bi, might be somewhere inbetween.

And I don’t want you to worry about your future, ok? Everything is going to fall into place

<3

And if it doesn’t I’ll be around to distract you with more lame animal comparisons

Haha I actually love you

Me too <3

—

Get on Skype!

Ok it’s late you’re probably sleeping

it’s just

ugh I don’t know who else to talk to so I’m going to rant at your phone like a completely normal person

but mum yelled at me for not doing my uni application yet

but I just don’t know what to do I mean law yes but how do I decide where?

This is huge

and I don’t want to rush into it

but she thinks I’m going to miss the deadline though there’re months left

and I just

ugh

now she isn’t talking to me

-

Dan I’m sorry I was sleeping. Skype now?

I really don’t mind you spamming my phone, please do, always, I’d rather you had somewhere to talk about this stuff

And you know, Manchester uni is good. I could show you around

—

I spoke to mum about going to look around the uni.

She asked where I would stay.

I kind of told her I have friends at uni there.

It’s a half truth right?

Awesome ^_^ Um do you think she’d like to know the truth?

Probably.

Idk.

She might freak out and be worried

Because you’re meeting a random man you’ve never met before?

Lmao when you put it like that

Are you honestly ok with this? It’s fine if you’re not

No no I’m so ok. I want to meet you. Like properly

I want that too. So much

So it’s going to happen. I’m buying train tickets

Awesome ^_^ but your mum?

Do you think I should tell her?

I think she’d be happier knowing where you are

Yeah. Yeah I know. I’ll talk to her

Give her my phone number too. And my address

Lmao you after more stalkers?

Dan I’m serious I want you to be safe

You spoon

yeah I’ll tell her everything. She might not be best pleased though

Dw if she locks you up I’ll come rescue you

<3

<3

—

I told her

!!! And?

She said yes

OMG!!!!! I’m out atm but Skype as soon as I get back?

Yes please :P

[insert happy pic]

[insert happy pic]

—

Hey Dan you should make a YouTube channel before you visit me

?? Really?

Yeah I mean you always say you want to. And we could do a collab ^_^

For serious?!

Yeah! I mean, if you want to

I’ve been wanting to do a Q and A for a while and it would be fun I think

Omfg

Is that a yes?

Hell yes it’s a yes

Um only problem is

How do I even make a video?

However you want ^_^ you’ve told me loads of good ideas

But they’re so lame lmao

They’re really not. I promise.

Why not start with an introduction? Then you can go on to your actual content

Omg but like do you really think I could?

Honestly! Yes.

Ok

Ok

My mum’s going out in a minute so I’ll have the house to myself. I could film

That’s brilliant! I’m about to head out with mum but film whilst I’m gone and we can Skype later yeah?

Ok wow

omg

ok

Phil this isn’t working I sound so stupid

fucking hell I can’t do this

You can! Act like you’re on Skype to me

Can we Skype?

Still visiting my brother sorry :( tonight we will

Ok. I’ll keep trying

You can do it! Pretend the camera is me. Or any friend. It’ll help

Ok <3

<3

—

Holy fuck Phil I have views.

And subscribers! So many subscribers!

Told you!!

This is because you tweeted it

No, it’s because you’re really bloody talented

>.< I can’t believe I did that

You did and you’re awesome and I’m so proud of you!

Can’t wait to collab :D

Me neither, if you still want to I mean

Silly, of course I want to. Best thing about this month

<3

<3

—

Um so a bit of a change of plan

??? Do I need to cancel the train tickets?

No no! Just

Turns out my parents aren’t going to be here the weekend you’re visiting.

Is that a problem?

Lmao no why would it be

are you planning to ravish me or something

>.< I don’t think I’ve ever ravished anything in my life

Well you can start with me ;)

Dan!

Seriously though. Is it ok?

Yeah. Honestly it’s great.

Are you sure?

Are you?

Yeah I mean honestly it’ll be nicer to see you without having to get around them

I just don’t want to weird you out

You won’t

I hope not

Phil honestly I can’t wait

:D me neither

where are you btw? Skype isn’t picking up

Oh yeah, my internet is down, sorry

:O no wifi?!

No wifi. I’m not sure how I’m going to survive

I’ll spam you with texts

Please!

Actually I have something better

[incoming call: AmazingPhil]

—

I’m at the train station and it’s super early I’m not even sure you’re worth it

Sorry! I’ll make it up to you with hot coffee and hugs ^_^

Ok yeah you are worth it

Aw :D

On the train next to an old man who’s threatening to fall asleep on my shoulder

x_X tell him to keep his hands off

Lmao yeah I’m sure you’d really sort him out

I could be fierce

You’re literally a muffin with an emo fringe

I’ll fill your bag with bees

I’ll tame them into my own personal army

Then you’ll be our evil overlord

Mwahahaha

Can I be on your side when you take over the world?

Your lion powers could come in useful so yeah I guess so

Awesome we can run the world together

Yes :P

ugh the train is running late

:( by how much?

Twenty minutes atm

I’ll still get to the station at ten to

Well it might be running quite late by the time we get that far north

I don’t want to miss you. I’ll be there <3

I can’t wait

Me neither

Stuck in Stoke now. Literally the weirdest station I’ve ever seen

Haha really?

Yeah. And it’s packed. I had no idea this many people travelled this early on a Saturday, I didn’t even know this time exists

It doesn’t and you’re travelling in some other dimension right now

Shut up :P

Just waved my parents off. I’ll head out to the station soon

I’m so nervous

Me too <3

Promise you won’t run a mile?

Promise. I’ll see you soon Dan

See you soon

—        

#phan #phan fluff #phanfic #2009 phan #phanfiction #iwritephanthings #runningintoyou