#alex zsakuva

[c-t-r-l14]

Why Alex’s Break Up Audio Made Me Appreciate Andrew’s Character More

A couple of days ago, as I was drafting the dialogue for the second part of Alex’s story, I started to think about Andrew Marston, our beloved Literature Professor. I remember when I first listened to the Alex’s break up audio, in the description of the video, Saku states that this was the first break up audio he’s ever done. But that isn’t true, ‘cause Andrew broke up with his partner at some point in his story, too. And then I started thinking about Andrew’s break up audio—and what I realized is that throughout that breakup audio—It never felt like Andrew was trying to get rid of listener.

One of the biggest things that pissed me off about Alex was his blatant disregard of the person he claims to love. He absolutely refused to try and make the relationship work, he gaslights listener and blames the failure of their relationship all on them, makes dumbass excuses that hold no merit whatsoever, and tried to make it seem like it was such a hard decision to come to, when in reality, it probably wasn’t. He tells them that he loves them and how he wants to be with them so badly, but never gives them actual chance to make that happen. And it honestly feels like he made all of these excuses and blamed listener for their relationship falling apart so he wouldn’t feel bad for leaving them behind. It was quite obvious that he saw listener as a burden that was holding him back, and he wanted nothing than more to get rid of them so he could finally be free and run away from them. He is a selfish, manipulative, gaslighting asshole with a victim complex. If he really loved listener as much as he says he does, then none of the excuse making or gaslighting would be necessary; but it seemed like to him—doing all of that would be the only way out without feeling bad about it. So, instead of being truthful about how he actually feels and just straight up telling listener, “I don’t want to be in a long distance relationship,” or “I’ve fallen out of love with you”, or literally ANYTHING ELSE, he decided to make things a lot more harder for them by pulling any excuse out of his ass and praying that it will work. It just felt like he was just throwing them away—like how a child throws away a toy after they’ve outgrown it—and it’s SICKENING.

But, Andrew was never like this.

Through his entire break-up audio, you could feel that he truly felt like he was making the right decision here—because above all else, Darling was the only thing that mattered to him. Something I’ve learned from Alex’s audio is that it’s really easy to point the finger to someone else and put all the blame on one party. It would’ve been all too easy for Andrew to straight up tell listener that it was their fault for perusing him—and if they’d just simply looked somewhere else to find love, then their exposé would’ve never happened—and both of their reputations would be spared from online scrutiny and embarrassment. But he didn’t. He and Darling both perused this relationship with the consequences in the back of their mind. They knew what would happen if they got caught, and repercussions that will follow. Andrew had enough integrity and honesty within himself to pour his heart out to Darling and told them how much he loved them. And you can tell that he was doing it because he thought that it was the best thing he could do for them—and that’s because he was HONEST. He never once made excuses, or gaslit them into thinking this was entirely their fault. And it never felt like he was just throwing them aside when it suited him.

And it shows more even when he came back to apologize for his behavior. Even then, he realized that it was wrong to make definitive decisions about their relationship without talking to his partner first—and was ready to accept the consequences of his actions because he realized how much he hurt Darling. He was honest about everything—even when it was hard for him. He made sure to put in the effort in his relationship to make sure he keeps Darling by his side. Even when people came after him—even after he got publicly humiliated—even after he lost his job. He tried so hard because he told Darling how much he loved them—and he meant it.

I respect the living hell out of Andrew because his actions always matched his words.

I want to make this clear—I’m not saying that Alex has to stay with listener. And I’m not mad that he wanted to leave. I’m mad because of the way he broke up with them. There was absolutely no reason to blame them for everything. There was absolutely no reason to gaslight and manipulate them. And there was certainly no reason for his dumbass to make such stupid excuses. He tells listener he loves them and yet does everything he could to get away from them. He wasn’t even man enough to be honest during their break-up. His actions matched the opposite of his words and that makes me sick. Alex makes me sick.

When he sees all of his friends move on to the next level in their relationships—whether that be marriage, or having kids—his stupid, sorry, good-for-nothing-except-crying-and-making-excuses headass will be ALONE. And he’ll stay that way until he realizes that being unwilling to put actual effort in a relationship and having no integrity is a rather unattractive trait of his. Although, I highly doubt that he’ll be smart enough to realize that AT ALL—because he has such a victim complex.

In short, fuck Alex, and stan Andrew. ❤️

#sakuverse #zsakuva #alex zsakuva #Andrew marston #Andrew zsakuva #reminding ya’ll yet again that Alex is the absolute worst and deserves nothing in life #Andrew is the true mvp #i really hope karma gets Alex back

[beeblelady]

Yeah this ain't about Alex haha 🌊

Enjoy my edit for this

I might make some in the future hahaha

#zsakuva #sakuverse #kayson #Kayson ZSakuVA #Luca #Luca ZSakuVA #Alex #Alex ZSakuVA #twitter #this aint about him

[literary-motif]

Me when Alex

#I'll be normal again in a bit #sakuverse #zsakuva #alex zsakuva

[elleneedsleep]

Everyone's listing their favourite Sakuverse characters lmao so I'll join 👏

1) Zaros Kymen Atha'lin (that full name just rolls off the tongue, and legolas-lookin ass design makes me nostalgic for classic fantasy novels like Eragon and Lord of the Rings)

2) Elias (yes, I was that wattpad kid when I was younger, and mafia aus are still pristine)

3) Isaac Rhoades (as someone with like a crippling fear of losing people, my boi is relatable and deserves the absolute world)

4) Andrew Marston (he was the first sakuverse character that I listened to, as a joke at first — noh, it is not a joke anymore)

5) Jonah (Jonah is me. Me is Jonah.)

6) Xanthus (the bond is such an intricate plot point, and Jouska's vamp boi led me to liking vampires)

7) Niall (give this man a job at the Tate Art Gallery, please)

8) Kayson (two best friends in a locker. They might kiss (yes, yes they will))

9) Dontis (tbh I love this guy's story and personality, but the only reason he's this low on the list is because the accent is personally not my cup of tea, no offense to saku, ofc ^^)

10) Asirel (the story behind his character is really cool, and I'm already intrigued from the bits of info we got in Isaac's story — I'm just not a fan of the Master & Pet vibes)

11) Cevyk (I really liked this guy until he started flaying Iqsus's skin—)

Not listened to (yet): Luca, Matias, Alex, Rowan

#sakuverse #zsakuva #isaac rhoades #andrew marston #zaros kymen athalin #xanthus #dontis #niall zsakuva #kayson #cevyk #luca zsakuva #jonah zsakuva #alex zsakuva #asirel #matias zsakuva #rowan zsakuva

[chol1na]

If you could pick one character to spend the rest of your life with, who would it be and why? Other than Alex ofcourse, he’s a give 😌😗

anonie, you and i vibe:) there’s a special place in hell for people like alex <3

this is a terribly difficult choice… i think i’d have to say either xanny or isaac? my first instinct was actually elias because he likes stars and like same (otherwise i wouldn’t put myself through the hell that is 3 accelerated math classes in one semester rip), but i’m still convinced we’re not being 100% transparent with him and i’m scared haha. then i thought of andrew cause who doesn’t love an intellect nomnom.

i think what i value a lot about lawrence and isaac is their loyalty and honesty. they don’t take advantage of listener? take isaac for example, at the beginning, listener is completely at his mercy. he could’ve done anything. he could’ve not payed them, he could’ve taken advantage of them in whatever way he wanted, heck- he could’ve left them to die and saved himself the hassle. even throughout his story, when he struggles with his feelings for them, he never puts them in harms way. the same can be said for our little leech; he’s not fond of “fates” and the idea of a seemingly irrational bond, and yet he’s still there for listener unconditionally. they’re both protective (see: meeting with vic. killing of yandere boy. etc) and just overall green flags? for the most part-. my final point would probably be that they’re both willing to communicate (unlike a certain someone…). eventhough they both have tremendous amounts of baggage, they want to make it work, they care enough to not only put in the effort, but actually follow through on their promises (see: isaac warming up to letting pickle out of the house).

n e ways, tldr:

final answer: isaac and lawrence

honorable mentions: elias and andrew

#lina rambles ‧₊˚✩彡 #anonie 🤍 #alex hate club 🫶🏻 #alex zsakuva #zsakuva x reader #zsaku x reader #isaac rhoades #Isaac #Andrew #andrew marston #Elias #xanthus #xanthus claiborne #Lawrence #Lawrence claiborne

[im-coolrat]

WDYM??? YALL WHAT. I’m freaking out just a tad bit

APRIL FOOLS RIGHT!

RIGHT??!?

#sakuverse #alex zsakuva #HUH?!??

[boowiij]

I love April fools okay I'm fine with the silly little Rick rolls and shit

BUT THIS IS

CRUELLLL

#WHEN I CATCH YOU SAKUU #zsaku verse #saku #zsakuva #alex zsakuva #crying #april fool's day #boowiji talks

[ashyx]

THIS IS EVIL.

#zsakuva #alex zsakuva #asmr

[audioroleplayconfessions]

honestly people who hate on Alex (zsakuva character) too much are just cringe. it’s all i see nowadays it was funny at first but atp…

.

#alex zsakuva #zsaku va #anonymous confessions #audio roleplay

[claiestve]

LMFAOOO

#zsakuva #asmr #sakuverse #alex #saku im still pissed

[c-t-r-l14]

This Audio Is SICKENING.

Ya’ll—I don’t even know where to begin.

When I tell you that I physically FLINCHED upon seeing Alex’s face in the thumbnail, the way my heart started beating, the way I started SHAKING while putting my AirPods in—you guys would’ve thought that I’ve gotten some terrible news or something. And—I don’t even know what’s CRUELER—the fact that Saku posted this audio on April Fools day, making us go back and forth between “is this cannon?” or “nah, this is definitely a joke!” Or him making it all lovey dovey at first, giving us a false sense of security—waiting for us to finally let our guard down so he could get ready to strike. But I do know that it broke me, and made me feel for listener even more.

I think one of the biggest reasons why it broke me so much was because we can see how much listener blames themselves. How much they think the breakup is all their fault.

And you can see how much its impacted them.

You see the thing with Alex is that he is really, really bad with communication. He’s rather quiet about how he feels, and doesn’t voice it out loud. A person like this—who doesn’t talk about their own feelings, who’d rather stay silent—usually are alone with their own thoughts. And that’s when things get rocky, especially in a relationship. One of the things that I noted in the break up audio (besides all the gaslighting, manipulation, and reality distortion), was the fact that Alex has had that argument on his mind ever since it happened, and not ONCE has he said something about it until the day they broke up. He was alone with his thoughts the entire time up to that point—mulling over the argument, his feelings, his future—and I feel like him doing this, instead of actually talking to listener to see how things can work out deadass lead him to believing that they couldn’t be together, which lead him to not tell them about the job offer until the very last minute. I wholeheartedly believe that if he sat down with them, and told them—“hey, I know you said sorry, but I still feel like shit because you made me feel this way,” if the thoughts got to be too much, then maybe things would’ve been better. But he didn’t—and just like listener, he assumed the worst, and on top of that— gave up without even trying to fight for the person he claimed to love so much. Instead, all he did was make excuses, act hypocritically, gaslight them, and blame them for everything—all the while not realizing that there was a whole bunch of things HE could’ve done better too.

And we can see how much it took a toll on listener—considering the fact that they were ridden with so much guilt that can’t even sleep well at night.

I can feel how much they hate themselves through Alex’s words as he tore into them, and this is honestly partly Alex’s fault, because he reduced them to a mistake they made. Dream Alex (who will now be referred to as DA from now on) was taunting listener—and throwing the words Alex said to them during the break up back to them. He kept on reminding them of their mistakes, and that THEY are the reason why he left. He kept on reminding them of the worst parts of themselves—and that’s high key what Alex did during the break up too. I feel like we all need to acknowledge that what DA said to listener in this audio is most definitely not a reflection of the way the real Alex would talk and act—simply because DA is a figment of listener’s imagination. And since listener is filled with so much hurt and heartbreak right now, of course their own guilt and self hatred is going to distort how things operate in their mind. So, let’s not take the things he has said at face value.

Listener has a lot to work on. Their trust issues left a wound that ran deeper than they initially thought. In a way, they are too much in their own head as well—and do end up going to the worst case scenario, and this behavior stems from the trauma they sustained from their former partner. This leads them to do irrational things, like invading Alex’s privacy and accusing him of stuff that only happened in their head.

Both of them have a lot of shit they need to work on. Alex needs to learn how to actually talk about how he feels, learn how to take accountability for the things he’s done wrong, and maybe grow a damn backbone, and listener needs to go get some damn therapy, get their trust issues sorted out, and learn all the facts before they come at people with any assumption they might have about them. I feel like this dream was kind of the point where listener realizes that they simply just can’t let their relationship end like this, because through this dream sequence, they realize that there was still a lot of stuff that was left unsaid, and are now seeking for some closure. I think now it’s the best time to go for it, considering that Alex apparently didn’t go to NYC and stayed in London instead (this is still very much unclear). And I am hoping and praying that his ass has the same nightmare listener had as well. Listener can’t be the only one who has a wake-up call (pun intended).

Their downfall was caused because these two idiots don’t know how to convey their emotions to each other properly. They could’ve had it all if one just actually opened their damn mouth to speak, and the other would just simply think before they open theirs.

This confrontation can go two ways: they cut each other loose and go about their own lives, or they find a way to make it work, (granted that they are BOTH willing to work on themselves).

Do I think their relationship is a lost cause? I don’t know. Something tells me that this probably isn’t the end, and a part of me (as much as I talk shit about how much I want listener to be an absolute bad bitch and leave him to drown in his regret), doesn’t want it to be the end.

With this being said, I still don’t like Alex. It’s gonna take much more than a damn walk down memory lane with a bizarre, brutal, dream version of him to get me to like him again.

Oh and by the way, Saku if you’re reading this—sleep with one eye open tonight.

Masterlist

#zsakuva alex #zsakuva #alex zsakuva #why did the beginning make me miss him a lil!?? #this audio was so damn sad bro #poor listener dude #I still don’t like Alex though #sakuverse #They are both hurting #as much shit as I talk tho #I want them to end up happy together #this shit actually broke my heart

[beeblelady]

Friendship Decreased with Alex

Now Luca is his Friend (Ft. Andrew) 😀

Here we go

#zsakuva #sakuverse #kayson #luca #zsakuva kayson #kayson zsakuva #zsakuva luca #luca zsakuva #alex #zsakuva alex #alex zsakuva #andrew marston #twitter #ZSakuVA Andrew #Andrew ZSakuVA #lollipop #funny

[literary-motif]

Not Even A Month

Alex x Reader

Despite its disadvantages, social media was the easiest way to keep in touch with people far away. As you scrolled through your feed, settling down with a cup of tea after a long day in court, you saw a beautiful black and white picture uploaded by Alex.

It was a mirror selfie he had taken with his camera, hiding his face. Arms were slung around his neck and the person leaning over his shoulder was kissing his cheek. The caption was a red heart.

You paused, feeling betrayal rising up inside you. It had not even been a month yet. 

#sakuverse #zsakuva #alex x reader #alex zsakuva #drabble #alex

[xzhdjsj]

Alex x Reader

Alex meets you again after years (his pov)

Here's a little something I wrote while procrastinating the Zaros fic and request I'm currently working on💀

ENJOY‼️

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

Life in New York was all I’ve ever wanted; one major decision that changed the trajectory of my career path for the best it could ever be. But something was missing, New York just wasn’t home. My parents visited and my friends called but the loneliness was inevitable.

The collection of memories I held close to my heart had sufficed for more than a decade but I just couldn’t stay in some place, where I was all alone, anymore. Besides I had made enough money to restart a comfortable life back home, so I did just that. I moved back to England. 

Initially I didn’t take any of the job offers I got, I needed the time to reconnect with the people I left. I was able to catch up with friends and colleagues, but not everyone stayed in one place. People move and change, start afresh and continue living. Maybe I should do the same.

I also couldn’t stay unemployed forever, so I decided to reopen a studio. It was nostalgic for sure, although I had no one to share the happiness with this time. Given my much improved resume, work was a bigger hit than it ever was and soon I found myself shooting for big companies and events.

Like the one I’m currently photographing. Some huge law firm hosted their annual anniversary celebration and hired me to capture important moments throughout the night. It was a lively event, a rich and deluxe atmosphere that I sure as hell did not fit into. 

“Mister? Why do you look so worried?”, I hear a small voice, then  felt a tug on the leg on my pants.

“Ah well hello there, who might you be?”, I squat to face the small child in front of me. 

“Allison sir! But you can call me Allie!”

“Allie huh? That’s a cute name, I’m Alex”

“All my friends call me Allie! Nice to meet you Mr. Alex.”

“Really?”, I raise an eyebrow and she nods, “So does that mean we’re friends now?”

“It does!”

I take her little hand in mine for a handshake and she giggles.

“I’m hereeee!” Allison legs go of my hand and runs towards the voice as I get back on my feet.

“We’ll at least I have a friend here ton-”

“Allison? Honey where are you?”, a worried voice comes from behind Allison, a familiar voice.

“Allie I told you not to sneak off like that, I was worried.”, the familiar voice continues, gentle and soft as I remember it.

“It’s okay,” Allison drags the owner of the voice over to where I’m stationed. “Look I made a friend!”

“Oh really? Well let’s meet the... m”

I couldn’t hold eye contact. Not after how abruptly I left them so many years ago.

“Alex, its... its good to see you again” their voice still as soft as ever, delicate like flower’s petal.

“Meet Mr. Alex!”

“Name, hi”, I start off, a weak start even for me.

“Oh? You know Mr. Alex?”, Allison chimes in.

“Yes Al, Mr. Alex and I were... friends when we were younger.”

“friends”

None of this should bother me, a child shouldn’t need to know of our history together.

“Alex, this is Allison, my daughter.” 

“my daughter”

Except it does bother me. It bothers me a lot actually.

“We’ve already met!”, Allison’s voice rings in again.

“It’s nice seeing you too, Allison has quite the charm.” I forced out.

“Right, I’m sorry sweetie.” they laugh with Allison. 

“I knew it, I definitely remembered your eyes from somewhere.”, I reach down to pinch Allison’s cheek.

“Yes, I get that very often. I didn’t you were back, I thought you’d stayed in New York for good.” they smile. 

God, I miss that smile.

“Thank you”

“Hahaha I just missed home. I didn’t feel like being away any longer.”

“Ah I see. Well then welcome back.”

There was nothing else to be said, and the silence could eat me whole.

“I’ll get going now, I hope you have fun tonight.”, they broke the silence.

“Yeah, you too.”

I watch as Allison holds onto their hand walking back to the middle of the room. My chest burns, it burns so much I feel like I might throw up but I keep watching them. I watch as they approach a man wearing a suit, who turns around and lifts Allison in his arms. His other arm wraps around their body and he kisses their forehead. I couldn’t take it anymore; I couldn’t watch anymore. I promptly excused myself, running to the bathroom. My throat clenched and I threw up. I must’ve stayed there for at least an hour. I cried and cried, more than I’ve ever cried even when we broke up. 

I couldn’t help it. I kept thinking, that could’ve been me. I could’ve been the one holding a child that was ours and comforting them when they needed it. I wouldn’t be photographing anyone else tonight, I’d be beside them holding them and kissing them.

IT COULD’VE BEEN ME. IT SHOULD’VE BEEN ME. WE COULD’VE HAD IT ALL.

Could’ve, would’ve, I left… so we didn’t. 

#zsakuva #sakuverse #asmr #alex #id pay money to see him cry and throw up from regret #this kinda reminds me of rolling in the deep by adele

[chol1na]

@c-t-r-l14 marry me. rn.

💍

#lina rambles ‧₊˚✩彡 #alex hate club 🫶🏻 #zsaku x reader #zsakuva x reader #zsakuva #alex zsakuva

[im-coolrat]

SPOILERS FOR THE NEW ALEX AUDIO!!

SO THAT WAS ALL A DREAM RIGHT??? Okay but when he said “Fuck, you don’t know how beautiful you are, do you?” 0///0 anyways IT WAS SO GOING WELL. WE WERE HAVING A NICE LIL PICNIC DATE UNTIL WE WEREN’T. We just HAD to bring up Natalie didn’t we. I actually hated how fast and broad the mood change. The amount of dread that washed over me. I hate how much I love that part. My jaw was on the ground when Alex was explaining how they followed him when he was taking pictures of Natalie. And when he said he pulled away from Natalie and explained he had a partner he loved I was so emotional (I’m saying emotional because I was feeling so much in that moment I didn’t even know what I was feeling) and then when we rounded back to the ‘right person’ thing I just- AAAAHSVDUAJWBDHDOWMSDBFHWOWOW- y’know? I actually hate when we go back to that. But I also love the conflict and angst of it. BUT WHEN HE SWITCHED IT UP AND SAID “Am I the right person?” I-

I actually had to sit down on the ground and hug my legs…. I was going through it. Holyyyy- So did he stay in London orrr no? Because it was a dream, right? Was the date setting before the argument? Like, was it a memory? Because we already now this was after the argument but was the dream setting before the argument or was it just what the brain making something up like a normal dream? Did the date actually ever happen? And the way he talked to them was so sweet :( You could just hear in his tone how much he loved them. And then the change to a more dreadful tone. His tone made me feel so sad and guilty. And him explaining what happened with him and Natalie. “And what did I do?….mhm. I backed away, immediately. Told her we were just colleagues and that I wasn’t interested. Told her I had a partner I was in love with.” “No, you wouldn’t really know, what we talked about after I shut her down. You left before you could. So your just filling in the gaps, as usual. Filling it with the worst thought. Those thoughts never left you. But I did.” “The right person. Are you the right person?” MY HEART STOPPED. MY JAW DROPPED. I WAS PACING AROUND. “I’ll ask you again. Are you the right person?” At this point I was on the verge of tears and ready to call my non-existent therapist “… well, seeing as your obviously conflicted. I’ll ask this instead. Am I the right person?” NOW IM CONFLICTED. I WAS IN SHOCK AND AW. I WAS FROZEN. I WAS FLABBERGASTED. I WAS GOING THROUGH SO MUCH EMOTIONAL TURMOIL. I HAD JUST WOKEN UP AND ALREADY GOING ON THROUGH SO MUCH EMOTIONAL TURMOIL. Or maybe that was all their imagination and all that never really happened. Maybe his explanation was false and it was just them trying to think maybe that’s what did happen. But my god how much I relate to them(for better or worse). Like, I feel like I would have the exact same thoughts as they did. I feel like I would have also approached this situation the same way. Because being cheated on and losing trust in everyone for so long, but then trusting one person with all of you. I feel like they realized they trusted him with all of them and it scared them. Because it would scare me. Everything going so well it seemed perfect, a little too perfect. And then the thoughts start to flood the mind. And everything goes to shit. Or maybe I’m just projecting, idk! But.….umm…yeah… 10/10 would watch again! :D

(DAMN This is long…. My bad)

#sakuverse #alex zsakuva #zsakuva #I keep adding to this my bad #and i will continue to do so