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#and a Bucktommy shippers replied: “a canon relationship”
wenellyb · 1 month
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I hope it's clear that I'm saying this with love, I love this fandom, I've been having so much fun!
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ultratradmalewife · 12 days
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Different anon here replying to one of your other anons. One thing I want to emphasize is that BuckTommy fans TRIED to be friendly with Buddies. We really did. In fact, all we did was post celebratory posts about Buck's bisexuality, talk about how much we loved him with Tommy, discussed what headcanons we had, in addition to the hopes we had for the future of their relationship. The large majority of BuckTommy fans were and still are fans of Eddie. The large majority of us LOVE Buck's relationship with Eddie, even if many of us only see it as platonic. We've never seen Eddie as a threat, nor have we set out to vilify and attack Buddie fans for not liking Tommy or wanting him to be with Buck. But the same CANNOT be said about Buddies. It became very clear, very fast, that Buddies were threatened by Buck's relationship with Tommy, and because of that, they quickly began antagonizing BuckTommy shippers. Calling us horrific racial slurs, being disgustingly homophobic and biphobic, accusing us of fetishizing Buck with Tommy because "we're slaves to white men" and "love calling white men massa" (real fucking quotes said many times by Buddies), intentionally posting what initially seem like positive posts in our tag, only to throw us a curveball at the end by basically saying "Psych!" with something extremely rude and anti-BuckTommy. They even post fanfiction that is presented as being all about BuckTommy, only to kill Tommy off at the end or have Buck break up with him and then have Buck get with Eddie. And they laugh about all of that, over and over, in the BuckTommy tag. All this to say, it can get deeply, deeply frustrating when people, especially so-called decent Buddie fans (because they can't tell me they don't witness the shit their fellow Buddie members pull on the daily), try to "both sides" this situation and accuse BuckTommy fans of being just as problematic and incapable of civility as Buddies. No, no, no. BuckTommy fans have been nothing like Buddies, and to try portraying us as an equal part of the problem feels like an extremely bad faith take meant to downplay the toxicity of Buddie shippers while vilifying BuckTommy fans for, God forbid, calling Buddies out on their abhorrent behavior. Because that's what the large majority of BuckTommy's anger consists of--defending our IDENTITIES against disgusting personal attacks, and, again, God forbid, daring to call Buddies out when they relentlessly, CONSTANTLY twist their head canons into "fact", misrepresent the truth over and over again, and then try to portray anyone who disagrees with them as stupid and beneath them. That's toxic ass behavior, and BuckTommy fans shouldn't have to sing "Kumbaya" for the sake of civility so some of you guys can feel comfortable, not when Buddies are committed to being cruel and disgusting at every turn. And I haven't even touched on the fact that BuckTommy fans are not the ones harassing the showrunner and actors, and trying to get an actor FIRED by misrepresenting what he said and trying to twist it into something actually really gross and fucked up, just so they can try to get what they want. So some of you guys can positively miss me with the "both sides" attempt. The only thing I WILL say about BuckTommy fans is that we do need to make a bigger attempt at ignoring Buddies. We can get a little TOO caught up in what the Buddies are saying and doing to us. But on the other hand, BuckTommy fans have a right to defend ourselves, especially when the attacks are constantly real fucking personal and don't even have anything to DO with shipping.
I agree with all of what you said. I know how things happened. I had even said there’s no reason for the Bucktommy side of the fandom to start a ship war, it all started with die hard Buddies, and I don’t usually see the ones who play both sides because I blocked them. There’s no reason in talking to them because they’re either just as scared of Buddies or don’t want confrontation. I also know people who want to play both sides are just people telling BuckTommy fans how to react, and they’re never telling Buddies how to act. I agree with you 100% on that and those are the people I block.
I’ve also been told I’m racist because I hate Eddie and Mexicans (I don’t), by people who either don’t know or don’t care that I’m Mexican (100% both parents born there and so was I).
I made a whole post explaining how Buddies have been homophobic when they tried to downplay their homophobia to simply cropping Lou from pictures. I know the slang and words that they tried to attach to him and the community. Those people are also blocked.
Now, like I told last anon I’m not trying to bridge that gap. You can see some of my own past posts how petty I can be to the die hard buddies. I am one person and I’m not going to change a whole fandom of toxicity. All I can do is block and search for those who can make my experience here a peaceful and fun one.
So far I haven’t made any friends here. There’s no DMs and it’s just been likes and comments on posts. I try reaching out to Buddie shippers who I think could be pals, and they never respond, or if I mention Tommy it’s dead silent afterwards (ironically the thing they claim to hate that Tommy did to Chimney is what they do to me), and I don’t try again. Most of the buddie shippers who I briefly talk to are ones who have seen how crazy their side of the fandom have started acting. Some of them have even “jumped ship” because of that.
I’m not here to make this whole group thing happen. I came from a fandom where these type of things don’t happen. This is new to me. I only left because the source material is too long and I know I don’t have the dedication or time to consume it fully, and people there respect the source material. I didn’t want to feel like I didn’t belong there, so I left.
I was able to consume the entire source material here. I even enjoyed myself doing it. 911 is one of my top 3 favorite shows ever. I entered this fandom having high hopes of fitting into a community, but as we can see that didn’t happen. I’m not trying to have all of us love each other or even talk to each other, all I’m trying to do is find that small few who can be part of a peaceful community for this one show.
I’m also not asking for any black person or person of color to forgive, only you have the power to do that for yourself.
I really want to find my peace in this fandom. I have blocked so many people, and don’t even try to reach out to others because I know it’s a lost cause, this is just my attempt to find my place here. I hope you can understand that.
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