#bc thats just fucking politics. thats how it is!!!

[notcatherinemorland]

i am like. 3 paragraphs away from the next chapter of my silly political comedy fic but it is giving me existential crisis like who let me have so much creative authority over my own fic. what do next.

#like if i continue with the plan it may change the tone of the fic irreparably #but if i Don't change the plan it will also have Consequences for the tone of it #but also i am no where near intelligent or educated enough to write what i want to write #but also if i put the research groundwork in then i Know it will do the aformentioned irreparable change #sigh. #this one specific letter is so so so so dicey but im not skilled enough to write it in the way that will make it Work #its like. the letter is Meant to be manipulative. it's meant to make your eyebrows raise. its supposed to come across at A Bad Look #bc if it was said aloud it would be bad!! it would be poor behaviour!! its in a private letter that is exposed only to the reader!! #bc thats just fucking politics. thats how it is!!! #however im not good enough at writing to do it effectively. like if it doesnt work it's just going to look flat hamfisted #and like i author endorse it #which like. no! thats why im writing this fic! because there's no textual canon outcome in my fandom that is genuine democratic government!! #and i thought it would be funny to write the emails getting sent around a government trying its level best to be democratic #when they are systemically functionally incapable of being so!!! #unfortunately thats a bit fucking dissonant with the idea of lighthearted comedy. #which i suppose is like. the point. #ok ive changed the bit slightly and simply added in a simply wonderful reference to a wilde character name/railway company im happy again

[snekdood]

yall are willing to die for trans women and not trans men and we should talk about it actually

#transandrophobia #you'll do anything to protect trans women but dont have that same energy for trans men. interesting. #anyways i think the reason this is is bc ppl like this think bc we're men we dont need to be helped or protected #that somehow we should have figured out how to do this on our own. that we dont need community bc we're already solid and tough enough #which is weird like. how are you trans friendly but then you dont do any other basic progressive shit like #getting rid of gender roles entirely instead of now instead applying them to trans people also? ?? #like you dont get to be all 'men should express their emotions and be vulnerable' and then reinforce the traditional gender roles on- #trans men still. like have you or havent you decondtructed that shit in your head or did you iust see someone reblog something that seema #correct w/o even doing any critical thinking or self reflecting or anything on your end at all #i didnt suddenly become made of rock and become invulnerable when i transitioned. bc that narrative for men in general is inaccurate- #and harmful. and even if i did become super buff and capable of mowing down my enemies that wouldnt mean i dont suddenly need community #that doesnt mean i become immune to bullets or that i dont need a space to express my emotions regarding being trans n shit #like yall really just want to leave us out here to die it seems like. we have nowhere to go. no real community bc yall wont give us the #time of day or compassion or anything. you think 'men bad' and thats the deepest your political analysis goes as far as im concerned. #and if thats the case how much better are you than a terf who just decided they were 'okay' with trans women? #p sure this post was inspired from a trans guy literally being a meat shield for other trans ppl and no one gave a fuck.

[whumpshaped]

cant stop thinking abt that reply to bram's post abt the abusive cluster b parents so just know if u were abused like that, first of all, samesies and it gave me cluster b pds as a result, second of all, i promise no one whos calling for understanding of cluster b ppl is invalidating ur experiences. if u feel like they ARE, i sincerely hope u realise u dont have to have a medical explanation for why others suck. if ur parents sucked, u can just say that, and its freeing, and focusing on behavioural patterns instead of diagnoses (which u most likely dont have access to when it comes to strangers) will allow u to weed out actual bad ppl and keep urself safe(er)

#i understand its easy and comfortable to latch onto labels especially when it comes to parents #i did it #then i was diagnosed w the same shit #that was my turning point i think #when i realised we have the same shit and yet i am actively working very hard to be kind and compassionate #i dont go out of my way to be mean #at some point u have to realise that some ppl r just evil and mean spirited #and pds arent indicative of how self aware or kind or polite or compassionate someone is #i'd argue most of us put in SO much work to know ourselves and our potentially harmful behavioural patterns #way more than a neurotypical who never bothered to look inward for even a second #'these stereotypes dont come from nothing' #no shit! my dad called me both borderline and narcissist as insults AND I TURNED OUT TO HAVE BOTH #but let me tell u smth #most of my symptoms? are fucking survival mechanisms i learned as a child to avoid getting hurt. because thats what the brain does. #u know what else didnt come from thin air? sayings like hurt people hurt people #plus my victim complex allows me to write banger complaint letters now so theres that #look around u and be very comfortable w the fact that ur probably surrounded by a bunch of cluster b ppl that u adore #bc we're just ppl too #and ur doing urself a disservice trying to spot us #cluster b ppl can be evil ppl just as neurotypicals but they can also be ur friend who struggles w insecurities and is a huge ppl pleaser #bc they read the ableist posts too and they know everyone in the mainstream world thinks theyre evil #and when if u told them 'well my cluster b parents were abusive' in a less accusatory tone #maybe theyd look u in the eye w compassion and say 'yea i know how that feels and im here for u'

[angelboybreakdowns]

& now im crying. great.

#came home she got out pork chops says i have to cook & eat them bc i need protein #dont want hot food rn & even if i did i dont have the energy to cook dont even have the energy to get a glass of water #but like i was handling it was gonna lay down a while then make pork chops feed them to the cat if i couldnt make myself eat & thats fine. #but then she said i was being a little shit bc of like i guess my tone of voice ir something? #idk man im tired & im frustrated & im in pain & im trying so hard to be polite & say the right things #but like. no matter how hard i try i cant get it right my voice always comes off wrong #& it always has & it will continue to the rest of my life #i try SO HARD she knows i struggle with tone & i still cant get it right & shes mad at me for it #i cant fucking do this i cant be a person im not GOOD AT IT. #im like failing at humanness and i always have been #& idk its a stupid thing to get so upset over & i know logically im being dramatic #but im just so tired #& i havent eaten since 7 so i probs have low blood sugar or something idk #and i’ve had a headache for 3 days that wont fucking go away #& i just cant make myself be rational rn #rambling

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#i say goodbye to my boss tomorrow #not like officially officially bc im still employed into August so we have meetings #and hopefully we'll collaborate in future on projects and i have papers to write with her still #but like this is the last time ill physically see her bc shes not coming back until August and ill b gone by then #so its like. sad. bc shes my science mum. today she was complaining abt some stupid politics stuff #that went on this week in the department and she was like i kno i should b more professional but i feel like since ur leaving now #were more colleagues and friends. and im like 😭 god dammit ur gonna make me fucking cry #i came this this school to work with u and u were so great. i was so lucky to have ended up in her lab #bc i didnt kno wtf i was doing and shes not perfect but i learned a lot from her and ill b really sad to not b working with her so much #but thats how it goes. ill have to make her something cool as a parting gift #god. thatll b a fucking pain but she deserves something that takes a lot of effort #were meeting tomorrow to go over a protocol but im not sure if that's actually what were doing or if theres a surprise involved #bc she likes to do that and it stresses me the fuck out. she's been wanting to get me ice cream for the last 2 months so that might actually #b what's happening. or both could b happening. ugh. anyway. just me crying abt how im gonna miss my boss who im literally seeing tomorrow #im gonna have to giver her a painfully earnest letter abt how great she is and apologize for kinda having a breakdown #i mean i wasnt totally nonfunctional but like. it was not good and im sure i kinda sucked to b around #but whatever. god. the move it finally on the horizon. it finally feels like its getting real #unrelated

[235uranium]

gonna be real i have yet to see anything actually compelling for antipsych to be a decent methodology other than "psychology and psychiatry havent been very good at doing science, so clearly science cant answer this question"

#☢️.txt #the psych fields are. not good! but we do have neuroscience pointing towards a biological cause #it just turns out that neuroscience is really really complicated and we do not understand how conciousness works #i just think that if yr political position relies on assuming that there will never be an explanation better than 'idk its just like that' #its kind of. a bad political take #i dont LIKE psych but like. i do not buy that my issues arent inherently biological #i also just find it personally frustrating that identifying as mentally ill isnt Acceptable to a lot of antipsych types lol #i dont identify as mad. that word doesnt explain anything about my issues #im mentally ill. and thats fucking fine. my brain does not work in a way conductive to survival #not just survival under capitalism. ANY type of survival #just like im chronically ill bc my thyroid doesnt work right. #there Is something my brain isnt doing. and there Is a biochemical reason for that

[teruthecreator]

trying so hard to be normal but i really don’t think i could survive going to the psych ward and i’m rlly like. bothered my siblings are pushing it so hard

#in neg city #they were rlly like ‘we can’t force you’ but then just kept fucking talking about it #even as i’m crying and saying no no i don’t want to go i’m not going i really don’t want to #and like. idk. when ur sister gets sent to the psych ward at a pivotal point in ur childhood #and that subsequent action adds onto the trauma u were already experiencing at that point like idk man! maybe going to the psych ward would #in fact be very very bad!!! #like any time i think abt the psych ward i think abt my sister one day just disappearing from the house. i think about when the doctors #withheld my letters and i thought my sister either hated me or was fucking dead. i think about having to hide all this agony behind polite #smiles while i was also being bullied mercilessly at school and my CHOIR TEACHER WAS DYING OF CANCER #i think abt the car ride when my aunt told me and my brother that she had to go back in #i think of empty houses and missing places at the dinner table and arguments and so many fucking arguments #i cant go into the psych ward i won’t. and it just felt like that’s all they wanted me to do #and then it became well michelle how do u want us to help u? LEAVE ME ALONE #THATS HOW U HELP. YOU LEAVE ME ALONE AND LET ME FIGURE IT OUT #i get rlly overwhelmed and stressed when too many people are trying to butt their heads in #and i know they mean well but it just feels like they’re both gonna become mom and i’m not talking to mom for THIS EXACT REASON #idk i just don’t think they can help. i get that they’re rlly worried but i can’t let them help i don’t know what they could do #and they wanna talk about this again tomorrow so now i don’t wanna sleep bc i don’t want tomorrow to happen #but i don’t have anything to do bc i’m in such a terrible mood #i rlly wish i wasn’t alive sometimes #clearly i’m putting too much stress on my siblings and mom is probably worried sick but i’ll never kno bc we aren’t talking #i’m just ruining everyone’s life i rlly shouldn’t be on this planet anymore

[nomaishuttle]

not 2 like. detract from how deplorable the rest of congress is but. i am glad to see that somebody from a red state esp a republican did the right thing

#it just goes to show like. it doesnt matter how blue your state is bc political parties r a scam #political parties are a shorthand so you dont have to think abt actual policy. you just pick a party that comes with a prepackaged #belief system and then you can just vote for them and be like i did my part! thats the fucking bullshit of vote blue no matter who is like #theres no need to actually research candidates when the rule is vote blue no matter who. it doesnt matter what they actually believe #they can be saying the same shit a republican is saying but if they use nicer language and are a democrat it negates it. the only thought #you have to do under the two party system is hrmm do i agree with the very very surface level 'policies' of this side or of the other one. #and from there all you have to do is pick whatever candidate is in the party you decided on. #i will admit im also like. lets go ky. even tho obv its only one of our congressmen. i will note that this is an outlier #stance from him bc he was also the only member of congress to vote against the hong kong human rights act and hes had some other gross vote #so i hope this doesnt come off as me praising him bc he is absolutely a piece of shit. but at least this time he voted for something good y

[timeisacephalopod]

I can't believe marvel's civil war seriously tried to tell it's audience that a team of (mostly) Americans with superpowers should be able to act like an international military police force with zero legal oversight because 'Gubmint Bad' and I guess 12 people having no legal oversight to their actions as an international force is fine?? That has got to be some of the most fucked up copaganda I've ever watched, and frankly I was shocked at how many people I spoke to fully bought into it too.

Like really, you actually think a small group of people almost entirely from one country should be able to act as an international military intervention team with zero legal obligations? If you think about that for more than 5 seconds it should be obvious as to why that's a bad idea and why America specifically would think that's a good idea.

#winters ramblings #this movies thesis is literally so fucked up??? it straight up says cops shouldnt have oversight #and yall believed it hook line and sinker because you Really Like the guy dressed as an American flag #the other Real Fucked Up thing goes to tony starks line about privatizing world peace #i CANNOT think of a more fucked up thibg then that W H Y #besus that the movie had to work SO FUCKING HARD to make the accords sound like a bad idea #and when you need to write the accords SO BAD that they all go to jail with no trials as if ANY world leader #let alone MOST OF THE WORLD'S COUNTRIES would ever agree to that then you KNOW youre playing stupid #if your shit has to be THAT bad to seem like oversight isnt good then youre purposefully manipulating shit #in a way thats not useful and says nothing politically except that youre uninterested in nuance or accountability #but marvel is copaganda so of course it has to say Cops Are The Best They Dont Need Limits- see look the government is WORSE #because the Whole World just wants to yeam up on america for no reason whatsoever they dont have a history of invading #literally ANYONE they hate to fuck their ekections and install rught wing terriristsas leaders bc better than communists!! #no no thats not why anyone with a brain would support the accords lets make it SO DELIBERATELY BAD no one would support it #but we wint even MENTION any of that in the movie no no we dont need to do that in the movie all about #this fucking piece if legislation why would we do good proper storytelling with ACTUAL reaaons for why the accords suck #reminds me of the joker movie with how much had to be pulled to make the avengers sypmathetic there #if you have to pull your narrative that hard then your story fucking sucks and so do your politics

[snekdood]

Dude.. my ex boyfriend totally did get me into conspiracy theory shit, even if unintentionally (i think its intentional im sure he believed in that shit. Would not surprise me at all.) At the time i was already pretty isolated from anyone online who mightve countered any of my dumb spiritual or alien related beliefs because of some dumb shit i said online making most of the friends and followers i made online generally avoid me, depending on who it was. I was just a regular pagan and then he showed me this weird video with all this weird conspiracy theory symbolism in it. I looked it up later on and looked up the meaning of the symbolism and came across a whole bunch of stuff posing itself as Secret Information The US Govt Doesnt Want You To Know About, etc. And then i just fell deeper into the conspiracy theory pipeline, traded my paganism for new age beliefs, and goddamn dude. Like we both got suspended from school bc he had a dumb idea to dumb shit there and i spent my time in detention fucking. Trying to read "the emerald tablets" or whatever tf. Its all coming back to me rn.

#anyways im not about to let yall make me feel guilty for falling in this direction anymore bc i was fuckin 14 and didnt know SHIT about us #politics aside from lgbt ppl deserve rights and to live like everyone else and same w all the other minorities (even tho i probably still #had issues i needed to work on around those things. still generally i wouldve considered myself progressive but apolitical) #and i was already at the time rejecting my christian upbringing and trying out satanism and paganism and such and so #i had a very rebellious mindset at the time. i also hated authority so the first antiesrablishment thing i saw i clung to bc it was #*close enough* to how i felt. none of that shit ever outwardly stated (at the time at least) that anything was abt jewish ppl and i was #filling in the parts about 'child sex rings' to be about christians bc thats how i knew them to be like. it just like. seems so obviously #something a christian would try to do. like a creepy priest or something. i imprinted my own meaning onto it #im not saying it was good but i definitely didnt go into it and stick to it for reasons some ppl might wanna believe #i was way more on the spiritual leaning side and the ~secret spiritual meaning~ of the world. like the flower of life or fuckin. #shit like how theres. idk. a fucking disc or something thats supposed to go on top of the great pyramids that super enlightened #people can only navigate like a spaceship or some shit? #idk the mythology of it all really fucking enraptured me. and i still liked the reptilians even tho they were supposed to be evil and #apparently an antisemitic dogwhistle. i thought it was the annunaki or whatever i was supposed to hate. at least. #the opinions were pretty mixed back then. admittedly i didnt really look up other ppls opinions on that stuff other than articles ppl wrote #like no forums or anything really. which is probably a very good thing i avoided those lol. regardless i thought of the reptilians #as being more neutral but generally looking out for themselves kinda like. the way a reptile would ig. but now that ik its a dog whistle #it really took a the magic out of all of that stuff for me :/ im disillusioned to say the least lol. #all that new age shit was appropriation. christianity rebranded. or weird shit people made up about atlantis or whatever sjjsksks #my favorite was the oceanis one where theres a star system where whales and dolphins come from #like that one was my favorite to believe in dhdjjsksksbdhs #imagine being on a star planet diving around in the sea of light u_u anyways it still sounds fun shsjskskwne. #i hope that one is at least more tame. though im sure its still somehow connected to everything else which im p sure it is #dude all of this information is just resurfacing about all of this shit. i could totally write a whole thing about all the conspiracy #theories i learned about. i might if only to make fun of it all sjdjksksks #yall ever heard of FUCKING david willcocks???? #his willing cocks??????? #his fucking ass #and gaia FUCKING tv #all that dumb shit

[jvzebel-x]

🦋

#'wUtS sO wrOnG aBouT tRyInG tO gEt HawAiIaNs oFf tHe StReeTs--' #'im HaWaIiAn tOo n tHiS iS wHy wE cAnT gEt aHeaD--' #girl just say youre one of the extremely few hawaiians who grew up on those islands&had the privilege not to spend any time homeless #&shut the fuck up LMAO. #there is no 'pOliTiCs' to be on the right or wrong side of LMAO we do not need an outsider haole who owns land while the bulk of OUR ppl #left on the islands is fucking homeless&we sure as shit dont need him or any of his ppl telling us how they plan on assauging that fact #WITHOUT giving up their land or their power lmao like shut the FUCK up. #tell me w/o telling me that you dont know anything about the state of homelssness in the islands lmao. #he wants to set up tiny home camps to model after the one thats been up in kakaako for years like kakaako isnt STILL home to the largest #homeless camp on oahu or like ppl who are homeless&housing insecure-- ACROSS THE NATION not just in hawaii-- havent been talking for YEARS #about why these mini camps meant to mirror homelss shelters but w/ individual rooms to give the illusion of privacy #while 'advocates&volunteers' demand ID&talk down to you&refuse to let you bring in your own items or exist according to your own schedule. #tell me w/o telling me youve never dealt w/ actual land development issues in your life lmao even w/ these terrible plans #what PLANET do the protected historic lands need to lose protection so the state can work w/ PRIVATE LAND OWNERSHIP to build these places? #'i Am HaWaIiAn--' girl shut the fuck up why should that matter to me if youre sucking haole cock&telling us were all failing #bc we wont do the same LMAO. #hope sacrificing your integrity&connection to us is worth it white supremacy will have a ball using you until you act up.

[woahajimes]

i think im in big trouble

#i hate history so much #i think i once made a post about ''the reason i hate it is because i dont understand it but im getting there and economics is interesting #and politics is too i just hate it because i dont understand it'' bc i genuinely thought so. no i just hate it so fucking much #i have a presentation next week about a current event and i have to answer ''how does this affect canada'' and its gotta talk about either #economics or politics and i know NOTHING about that. literally 0. today this kid got humiliated because his current event was about a #school shooting recently and it was like social psychological soething and no econ/politics and i wanted to die #its gonna be me next week im actually going to cry i hate history guys like. i'd rather physics and thats saying SOMETHING. it also doesnt #help that my history teacher is like. bullshitting everything. he's so smart dont get me wrong. one of the most philosophical and smartest #men i've met but holy jesus fuck he can't teach. he can talk and talk and talk but he doesnt teach you how to get those conclusions and #actually apply them to like stuff. yeah i have to talk about the economy and shit but how do i do that. i can memorize thigns he says but #that's not understanding???? there's an alternate history teacher and im actually going to cry bc hes an actual teacher and he also likes #me very much. (he is literally paying for my physics tutoring...). anyyways that's that. #also at work i won an award for personnel with most customer 5/5 stars #like god i love my job #and today i might or might not have purposely flirted with a man so that he could do the survey that gives me 5/5 #lol #produce guy is actually a robot i fear. either that or he genuinely doesn't like me because

[snow-and-saltea]

went a little insane while showering today thinking of miss medea and psyche from hit webtoon series your throne

#oh my god i literally cannot stop thinking abt them #your throne #my beloveds... MY BELOVEDS.... #THE FACT THAT?? PEL IS KINDA HELPING OUT MEDEA EVEN THO HE “SHOULD” BE WITH PSYCHE BC OF THEIR DISPOSITIONS #WHILE HELI IS HELPING PSYCHE EVEN THO HES SO LOYAL TO MEDEA??? #going insane going batshit crazy #i want psyche and medea to rule the kingdom bc thats literally so... SO...... #BC LIKE.... BC LIKE YOU KNOW HOW MEDEA TOLD HER TO AIM HIGHER #“will you stay in that small house? be someone.” #SO PSYCHE WILL HAVE TO ATTAIN POLITICAL POWER LATER ON #AND WE KNOW MEDEA IS GONNA FUCKEN MURK EROS #(just waiting for the day and building up to it) #AND. AND. WHO ELSE IS MORE FITTING TO STAND BESIDE HER THAN PSYCHE #FUCK ME UPPPPPPP #yuu rambles