#bc when i said we should go see placebo he said yes but then the corona capital happened and he's basically paying for my tickets and all | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cinnamonest · 3 years

Note

did you say ceo of fErAL RAzOR

don’t be shy, talk some more on that

The time has come for more content of my boi!! I am so glad he is getting the love he deserves from my anons 🥺 anon... Let's hope he doesn't find out about any of those stories of women who had tons of kids... Darling just keeps her knowledge of those rare cases on the down low

------

Boy is feral, in this house we LOVE and we CHERISH this boy and all 3 of his braincells. Time for some blatant favoritism!

- Animals tend to sleep in cycles, not straight 8-hour periods like humans. They sleep a few hours, briefly wake up and do stuff, then go back to sleep. Same thing here. Expect to be woken up at 4 am by being rutted into.

- please God don't teach him about edging, or the concept of delaying orgasms. He won't necessarily do it on you, but himself. In other words, if he's not too horny and has enough self control, he'll just stop before cumming, nuzzle up into you, and slow down to lazy, agonizingly slow pumping motions, speed up again, slow down again, rinse and repeat. He can keep from cumming too fast, and make sex last for hours. He thinks it's the best thing he's ever discovered. Even if you don't.

- now, humans don't technically have ruts, but our brains are powerful things, and he believes he does - it creates a placebo effect, and he will get hornier, which yes, it turns out IS physically possible for him. He becomes convinced that, if females have cycles of fertility, he must too, so this is the prime time to knock you up. He doesn't like how cum seems to spill out of you every time he pulls out after, though, so he just won't pull out. Even between rounds, he'll just stay inside of you. His dick is long enough to stay inside even soft.

- He's probably insecure bc he doesn't have a knot and thinks he should

- speaking of, please do not alert him to the existence of a fertility cycle and the practice of tracking said cycle. It's just. Not a good idea for darling.

- Also a little bit irked by defiance, his brain has a simple thought process that makes your defiance seem so unreasonable. You're weaker AND female... Therefore... It's only natural that you're supposed to do whatever he tells you to do, and he gets frustrated if you don't. His frustration is mostly huffs and puffs and pouts, frustratedly tugging you wherever and holding you still. It's kind of cute, really. Mentioned this before, but animals don't really... get consent like that. Really, he's one of the most sympathetic yans, because to him it's just how things are. Sure, sometimes the females kinda whine and fight a little bit, so the big males just shove them down, and they stay mates, so he doesn't see why you'd have a problem with the same thing. It also makes him one of the most infuriating yans to deal with because you could explain it a million times and he still would not get it. You could ramble about the concept of consent and his response would be something to the effect of "But I'm stronger than you, so I can just hold you down." And then you try to explain why holding you down is wrong, and the logic loop starts over. He's not gonna get it.

- Likes your escape attempts to a degree. He doesn't really leave a lot of windows of opportunity, but chasing is fun! It's better if you try it at night, because his eyes have long since adapted to seeing in the dark - he'll see you long before you ever see him, but seeing you look around all frantically when he's practically right in front of you is kinda cute. And when he finally reaches out to grab you, you let out a little squeal that just reminds him of small animals a bit too much, it's instinctive to bite down on you. Reminds him of bunnies that squeal and struggle.

- scent/taste kink. He has a heightened sense of smell, really, from adaptation to his environment. As a result, he can subconsciously pick up on lots of little things like pheromones, arousal, slick etc. He can smell when you're wet and knows when you're most horny, and boy oh boy if he's not gonna use that to an advantage. Come on, you can't say no, clearly you smell so nice because you want it too, in fact it's really your fault for being turned on and making him the same way. He's a gross little cryptid about it too, likes the taste of it all -- not even that you feel good, but just, it tastes really good so he'll just hold you down and eat you out, lapping up everything and digging his tongue into you.

- Dog whines instead of moaning. Just. Putting that out there.

- no concept of foreplay. Sorry. Just. Grinds into you whimpering. You can teach him about it, and he'll grind into you and make out with you, but he's still pretty impatient, and that stage doesn't last too long.

- very short, if any, refractory period. Poor darling.

- Now, let's say you're in a timeline where you're trying to help the poor boy adjust to society and living among people. He has no -- I mean, ZERO -- concept of inappropriateness or PDA. You're just sitting with the rest of your party talking late night in some inn and he's physically laying on you, strung out over your lap - honestly you can treat him like a dog and just run your hands through his hair and he'll be happy. However, this applies to more than just g-rated physical affection. Nope, you'll be talking to everyone and boy just reaches up to grab a titty because he feels like it. You talking makes em jiggle, it's too tempting. You'll be letting him lay his head in your lap as aforementioned and he turn over and just starts nuzzling in between your legs -- his face is close and it smells nice, ok? Overall he's just very grabby, very physically clingy, touchy all the time. It's a way of showing love.

- Speaking of. You know how animals have this "if I can't see them, they can't see me" mentality and will think they're hidden even if their tail is sticking out? He has a "if there's walls, it means no one can hear" mentality. Doesn't know how to be gentle, every time you're fucking the bed is rocking heavily, thumping against the wall, and he doesn't try to hold back little whines, holds your mouth open and fucks you with such ferocity that you end up even louder. Expect complaints and mockery from the rest of your party.

- And of course, you will at some point HAVE to explain that human women don't have 30+ babies in their lifetime. He's crushed, really. Devastated. But he resolves to make up for it by, at the very least, contributing to the realm of human knowledge by trying to find out exactly what the limit on human women is.

#lena's asks #brainrot thoughts #razor thirst #tw: misogyny #i guess?#q

234 notes · View notes

cookinguptales · 4 years

Text

Today, SCOTUS is hearing arguments about whether businesses should have to cover birth control for their employees in their health insurance plans and I just. It’s hard to read.

I was going to make up this big informational persuasive post about the situation. But I’m just. I’m just so sad and angry and tired. So I figured I’d make an emotional one instead.

Let me tell you about my hormonal birth control journey.

(Rest under a cut for length and content. cw: mental illness, graphic discussion of medical issues, injuries, & menstruation, discussions of suicide & self-harm, discussion of opioids, alcohol, & recreational drug use.)

I started taking hormonal birth control late in high school to help regulate “painful periods”. It wasn’t for actual birth control at that point and I hadn’t been diagnosed with any disease, not even POTS yet. I just had “painful periods”.

Things were okay for a little while, but when I got to college, things started to fall apart. The double whammy of undiagnosed mental illness and a barely-diagnosed chronic illness (POTS was relatively unknown at the time and my doctors gave me information which I now know is incorrect) really caused me to spiral during my first year of college. I didn’t know it yet, but I react very poorly to some forms of hormonal birth control. Put succinctly, they drive me batshit insane. On one pill, I literally did not leave my apartment for over a month. I became very literally agoraphobic. Bouncing off the walls, irritable, angry, high suicidal ideation. As bad as side effects can be.

But I didn’t know that yet. I just stopped taking BC as part of the whirlwind of medicines and doctors that my life became for about two years while I was on my (first) medical leave from college.

My ribs were coming out back then. I didn’t know that yet, either. I knew that when I was around 16, I started getting severe back pains. The first time it happened, I had to go to the ER because I couldn’t breathe and my teachers thought I was having a heart attack. I got a narcotic shot in my butt. It did nothing to dull the pain. That’s how much it hurt. But it went away on its own eventually and I over the years I started medicating reoccurrences with a lot of different things. Physical therapy. Muscle relaxers. (Medically prescribed) opiates that made me puke. Prescription strength Advil. Wine.

I didn’t see that it was all connected yet. Not yet. I didn’t realize, with my periods as irregular as they were, that the back pains were coming around the same time in my cycle each time.

My “painful periods” got worse. I talked to an OBGYN, with my mother in the room. I told her that I was scared of something like childbirth. I knew that my blood flow was dangerously bad. What if the fetus didn’t get enough blood? Oh, my doctor laughed, that wasn’t a problem. The fetus would always get enough blood. The risk was that I wouldn’t. That it, like the tiny vampire it was, would take it all until I simply died. If I got pregnant, I would likely die. I asked about permanent sterilization. My mother cried. My doctor said no. I didn’t ask again.

I went back on birth control.

It was odd. I didn’t want children before that visit, not really. I was so tired all the time. I knew I’d never be able to manage to raise a child — and honestly, I didn’t care to try. I was so depressed. I was so sick. It sounded like so much work. I still don’t want to have kids. But it still feels… weird, knowing that I can’t. And knowing that I could die if I get knocked up.

I’m bisexual, but I have zero sexual contact with men (because I don’t love them, despite being somewhat sexually attracted to them) and zero sexual contact with people with penises (because they could literally kill me and it would be no one’s fault). But I’ve been followed home by men before. I’ve had cabbies lock me in and ask me for a date. I’ve had men who won’t take no for an answer. And my god, it terrifies me that I might have to deal with both sexual assault and a slowly creeping murder all at once.

(It’s laughable to think he’d be tried for both.)

I ended up getting sick off birth control a few times. I went on and off it periodically during my college career. I now in retrospect see that a lot of my “meltdowns” were a combination of discrimination-based stress, physical breakdowns, and hormonal whirlwinds. At my worst times, I was on birth control. The wrong ones.

My periods, over time, got worse. My back would hurt. The cramps were unbelievable. I couldn’t feel my legs. I could feel them too much. I couldn’t keep food down. I’d be so angry, so sad, so everything.

I went to the doctor again. I was diagnosed with both endometriosis and PMDD. PMDD, or premenstrual dysphoria disorder, is like PMS on steroids. I remember telling my doctor, in halting tones, that I wasn’t well before my periods. That I always had depression, always had anxiety, but I wasn’t well before periods. At her prodding, I confessed that sometimes I would just lie there for hours, for days, in the fetal position. That I’d clutch at my own arms, mooring myself, because I knew that those white knuckles were the only thing between me and killing myself. That my brain, always somewhat malevolent, became an inescapable mantra of death. That I’d just lie there and sob because it took everything I had not to hurt myself. That I’d find claw marks, bruises, on my arms later, and all I could do was get some ice.

It was better than the alternative.

I told my doctor about how painful my periods had always been. How I’d heard a story once about, y’know, that Spartan boy? The one who hid a fox kit under his shirt during an examination and stayed perfectly silent even as it clawed at him so he wouldn’t be caught with it? How it tore at his stomach until he fell down dead, still silent? I told her how I felt like I was holding a fox kit every damn month and sometimes I couldn’t stand the pain of it. Sometimes I considered ending that pain, one way or another.

She put me back on birth control.

A little less than a year later, or in layman’s terms, about a year ago, my mental health was so bad again that I was almost committed. Literally committed. I had to go stay with my parents for a few months while I transitioned to new medications because it wasn’t safe for me to be alone. I learned that the birth control I was on could create those symptoms — but they didn’t start until months after you’d started taking it. So you didn’t realize it was the medicine. You just assumed you were crazy and unlikable and so, so angry. At the world, at your loved ones, but mostly at yourself.

I learned, around that time, that I also had Ehlers-Danlos syndrome. That the pain I felt every month right before my period wasn’t just cramps. It was my bones coming undone from their sockets. It was my hips dislocating. It was my ribs popping out of my spine. I realized that that lump my parents could feel in my back wasn’t a hard knot of tense muscles. It was my fucking rib poking out of my back. I learned that there is a period right before menstruation that mimics a period during pregnancy where your joints loosen — your body thinks it is preparing you for birth, for loosening your pelvic cavity so an entire head can pass through. For someone with Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, that period of joint looseness was enough to wreak absolute havoc on a system of already-weakened joints.

I learned how to put my own ribs back in with a foam roller. I started drinking marijuana tea for the pain. I went on a different birth control. I stopped taking the placebo pills. I had to fully eradicate that entire portion of my cycle. Goodbye PMDD and ribs constantly popping out. I don’t miss you!

I am still on that pill, y’know. Every day I take it and wonder if I’m one step closer to the day when it inevitably destroys me. The last one took about a year. Tick tock.

Or maybe I finally found the one that works… I really just don’t know.

The fact of the matter is that I have a full handful of maladies that require birth control so I can function. PMDD, endometriosis, dangerous pregnancy, EDS. I need hormonal birth control. I would probably be dead by now without it. The PMDD especially was that bad. My internal organs are likely a scarred-up mess. But the birth control itself almost killed me, too. God, it was close.

Simply put, birth control is heaven and hell all wrapped up in a pill. It treats illnesses and it prevents pregnancy. In other words, it provides you with both freedom and peace of mind. It is absolutely essential. But it’s also monstrous. The sheer number of sometimes-deadly side effects that come with hormonal treatments is staggering. Which is why you need to be under a doctor’s careful eye when you’re on it. You need to be free to choose whichever brand you need. You need to be free to switch kinds at a moment’s notice. None of these things are possible in a system where these pills are not fully covered by insurance.

(And yes, I know, this is a stupidly American problem in so many ways. Obviously the ideal thing here would be single-payer for all medical procedures. But that’s not up for debate here and insurance for BC is. Because for some reason we let some people’s religious convictions determine others’ health care. But I digress.)

Please don’t worry too much for me. I have a good employer who has told me in no uncertain terms that I don’t need to worry about my healthcare coverage. But there are so many people just like me. Who may not have diagnoses yet. Who may have “problem bodies”. Who only know that they need to do something and that they might have to go through several pills to find it. Whose employers either have the strong religious belief that hormonal birth control is a sin or the strong religious belief that they want to pay as little as possible for their workers’ health care. (Call me cynical.)

Those are the people I worry about. Those are the people I feel absolutely sick over as I watch the SCOTUS argue whether we should be allowed to have life-saving medicine. The people who I know will fall through the cracks the second that the cracks are widened enough for them to do so. The people who will die.

It’s a tense time right now. It’s a tense time for very obvious reasons. But this morning I find myself to be even tenser, and my stomach hurts thinking about it. It feels like all I can do is stare at a pill packet and remember every horrible reason I need it and every horrible thing it’s done to me and I just.

It’s a lot.

#long post #just me #handsoffmybc #birth control #feelin some kind of way this morning #please mind the cws #PMDD is one of those illnesses that I wish was more discussed #I feel like one day I'll make an entire post about how dangerous PMDD is #and how our cultural dismissal of PMS is dangerous #and unfair for that matter

14 notes · View notes

sicklylittlesnowflake · 7 years

Note

here is a riverdale prompt: What about A school trip where archie gets car sick but nobody knows and he's sitting w Jughead at the back of the coach and the teachers are all like 'thank god nobody here is carsick remember last trip with so and so haha' but Jughead notices that archie is being really quiet and finds out

(This is hella cute anon and On the shorter side bc idk how to lengthen without waffling!)

Archie thought of himself as pretty adventurous, and didn’t scare of extreme rollercoasters or extreme sports, leaving the anxiousness to someone like Betty or Jughead. He knew he had a pretty strong stomach, so he had no clue why he was feeling so carsick now.

He had been on school trips before; he had been fine then, and he had been out on buses to Away games at other schools with the bulldogs. But for some reason this year’s field trip did not do him any favours.

Everything about this bus made Archie want to hurl; for one the bus smelled of that sickening car air fresheners in a can that he absolutely detested. His father used to have one of them when Archie was younger; and he hated the sickly sweet smell so much he had thrown a tantrum and refused to ride the truck.

The road was also very bumpy, and Archie could practically feel the contents of his stomach jolt as the bus hit a bump and jumped. The bus driver drove erratically, driving way too fast like he was on some amusement park ride and sometimes came to an abrupt halt, slowing down and then picking up the speed again.

Archie clutched his stomach with discomfort, all his concentration focused on trying not to pour the contents of his stomach out. His head spun, feeling extremely nauseous, not having said a single word in about half an hour. His breathing was shallow and short, in fear that the stuffy bus air was going to tip him off the edge and reenact that scene from the Exorcist.

Archie just wished everything would just be quiet for a while; the extreme loudness of his fellow peers further intensifying his splitting headache and overwhelming his senses. He could faintly see speakers being tossed around, ear splitting techno music blaring out of them, chanting from the bulldogs and the whatnot. He was not a violent person by any means; but he literally wanted to punch someone.

He could hear a two of their teachers conversing up by the front, their chortles loud, each word of their little tête-à-tête not very private at all.

“Thank god everyone’s doing okay, we wouldn’t want a repeat of last year..”

“Absolutely! Do you remember what happened last year with Mantle?”

The teacher chuckled, sighing with the horrific memory with the faintest of fondness, “Of course, how could we forget the absolute horror show of last year?”

“Not cool Mr Anderson!” Reggie yelled from the back.

“Neither was puking your guts out, Mr Mantle!” The teacher yelled back.

Reggie pouted, huffing and crossing his arms in a sulk, as the Bulldogs began to whoop in a taunting manner all around him, batting him and flipping at his hair.

Archie tensed, gulping in fear, not wanting to create a show of himself, especially with the judgement of all his fellow peers. He really did not want to deal with the absolute shame and humiliation that he would feel if he managed to do a repeat of the Mantle Misadventure of last year. Archie was nowhere as popular as Reggie, and this would not go down well for someone like him, he didn’t exactly have the complete set of Jock merits.

Just as he began to sulk to himself once again, suddenly Jughead yanked his headphones off and cleared his throat, shuffling around to face him.

“Alright, what’s up, Archie?” Jughead said quietly, concern and care practically oozing out of his Tiffany blue eyes.

“Nothing,” Archie said through gritted teeth, resting his head back and squeezing his eyes shut.

Jughead rolled his eyes, “I am fine, he says as he grits his teeth in pain and bleeds out to his oblivion. Yes, Archie you are so clearly fine that you haven’t said a word since we’ve been on this bus, when usually you are the loudest fuck here, which is why I wear my headphones.”

Archie couldn’t help the small smile with that, much to Jughead’s amusement. He sighed, shrugging his shoulders, “..I’m not as good as the hiding problems as you quite yet, care to give me some lessons some time?”

Jughead smirked, “..I’m not sure about that, maybe I just have a better Bullshit-o-meter than you.”

“So, what’s up pal?” Jughead said teasingly, but the root of his words stemming from concern and worry.

“Carsick,” Archie whispered, so no one could hear him.

Jughead’s eyes softened, “Awh, dude, that sucks. Makes matters worse that everyone’s being a total dick about what happened with Reggie last year.”

Archie nodded, “Exactly, I don’t want to make a total spectacle of myself. I love performing, Jughead, but..”

“You like to hone your artistic abilities through the art of music, rather than the art of a puke show.”

Archie managed a smirk, “Exactly.”

Jughead cleared his throat, “You’re totally cool, dude..imma get you through this,let me work my Jones magic.”

Jughead then moved to open the window, causing Archie to raise an eyebrow.

“Wow, that really is some magic, I am absolutely enthralled,” Archie taunted sarcastically.

Before Jughead could reply, Chuck was shouting over, “What, Jones? You finally deciding to take some fresh air for once and actually leave your dark corner?”

Archie moved up to defend his best friend when Jughead rested a hand on his chest to reassure him, to tell him he had it under control.

“It’s cause you stink, Clayton, doing the whole bus a favour,” Jughead shot back, causing the whole bus to erupt in “ooooohs”.

“JONES! JONES! JONES! He got you real good, Chuck-E Cheese!"Reggie chanted.

Jughead smirked with his victory, sitting back as he returned Archie’s waiting high five.

"Nice,” Archie grinned, however it did not last because another wave of nausea hit him, causing him to curl within himself and protectively clutch his stomach, one hand over his mouth.

Jughead frowned, “Just give the air a few seconds to kick in, that’s why I opened the window. The stuffy air isn’t doing you any good..and get rid of that cherry air freshener which I’m sure is one of the factors causing this?”

Archie nodded, as Jughead took Archie’s backpack and pulled out his pair of sunglasses and put them on for him.

“Wh..?”

“Shh, your senses are overwhelmed, that’s why you’re feeling like this, so we should probably try and subdue them, y'know, disabling any visual stimuli? Close your eyes, now nobody can see it.” Jughead explained casually.

Archie nodded and obliged, “That really helps, Jug..you’re a gift.”

“I’ve heard,” Jughead joked, and Archie could practically hear that smirk through his voice, and could hear slight rummaging and rustling until three soft candies was being pressed into his palm.

“Huh?”

“Eating ginger helps carsickness apparently,” Jughead shrugged.

Archie was confused.

Jughead facepalmed, “No, Archie–I’m not implying you eat yourself or someone from the Blossom family–the food! Those are ginger chews on your palm!”

Archie would honestly do or try anything to try and stop this, and maybe even if he told himself it would enough through a placebo effect, it would be worth it so he popped the candies into his mouth.

Archie felt a little bit better, slightly relieved of his horrendous symptoms but he still felt pretty queasy. He could basically feel the contents of his stomach slosh and swish around, trying not to gag as his head continued to pound. “I don’t want to get sick,” Archie whispered lowly.

“You’re not going to,” Jughead reassured, resting a gentle hand on Archie’s arm, the free one lifting up to Archie’s temple as he massage it soothingly, humming ever so softly.

“You got that from Kevin,” Archie mumbled.

Jughead chuckled his reply, continuing to hum softly, trying to distract Archie from his troubles and to bring his mind to a different place so he wouldn’t think about the nausea.

Archie slowly raised an eyebrow, attention zeroing in on the melody Jughead was humming, wondering why the tune felt so familiar and homely. Then, it dawned on him who the creator of the piece was.

“..That’s..”

“Oh my god, are you only realising now?” Jughead teased, no actual cruelty to his voice, only playfulness.

Archie giggled, then shut up and returned to the mindful state he had been in a few seconds ago, “..Do that again, you sound good.”

Jughead huffed and continued, slightly embarrassed and bashful but would easily put away his pride for the comfort of his friend, although he’d never admits it.

As Archie continued to listen to the soft melody, he found that he was solely concentrating on it, and that he was being distracted from his other, more disturbed senses. He was so glad Jughead was here; because that boy knew him the best. He knew what was bothering him without him saying anything, they were connected on this cellular level and he was so grateful for him.

“I swear you have a master’s degree in improving car sickness, Jug, what school did you go to?” He joked.

“The school of tragic backstories and brooding lone wolf types,” Jughead joked, unbothered and fine as ever. Archie tensed very slightly, the darker implication of Jughead’s childhood unbearable to him. He would never understand nature’s cruel way of hurting his best friend.

Jughead rolled his eyes fondly, “Oh my god, Archie. Your lack of a poker-face is part of what makes you so endearing. I’m fine, at least now I get to make sure you don’t make a show of yourself. Save that performance for Madison Square Garden.”

Archie smirked, “You think I’m endearing and think I can make it to Madison Square? Two compliments at once? Woah, is the prince of the dark side finally joining the light side?”

Jughead huffed, unable to stop himself from smiling, “Don’t get ahead of yourself, Jar Jar Binks.”

“Hey!” Archie protested, offended, slapping Jughead’s arm, making his friend laugh heartily.

After another 20 minutes of driving, and Jughead successfully distracting his friend with banter and childhood stories, the bus came to a halt as they parked at their destination.

“Oh my god, finally,” Archie sighed in relief, stretching out in victory.

“You did really well Arch,” Jughead smiled warmly, patting Archie’s shoulder.

The teachers got up, stretching.

“Well, I’m very glad that went as well as it did! No one got sick!” One of them exclaimed.

Jughead and Archie smirked, high fiving each other.

“We won, dude!” Archie grinned as the students at the front began to pile out of the bus.

“For now, we’ve still got the return journey.”

“But you’re going to get me through that too, won’t you?”

“Of course.”

#archie andrews #jughead jones #riverdale #jarchie #sickfic #emeto tw #reggie mantle #prompts #did i borrow a line from the sneak peak??#yes i did lmao

44 notes · View notes