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leviathans-watching · 1 year

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D&D(evildom) Beyond!

my half of a trade done with @kasketart! it was a pleasure working with you and i hope you enjoy!!

includes: lucifer x gn!oc (they/them pronouns used)

wc: 6.5k | rated t | m.list | posted on ao3

a/n: i know very little about dnd, so s/o to my brother who is a dm answered all of my questions & beta-read this for me. i appreciate you!! but anyway, i tried my best to make this work similarly to actual dnd so i apologize for any glaring mistakes lol // i also have a drive folder here with character sheets i used as reference if that's something you want, and i was very intentional about choosing the classes i did for the characters but i will admit lucifer being a paladin was mostly irony lmao. this was also written before dungeons and demons dropped // also, for general requests, i do not write oc's, but since this was a trade where i received something in return, kasketart had more autonomy over the work that an anon requester or wtv would have

“Leviathan, Abel, what were you doing?” Lucifer prompts, and the two share a look.

“We were playing Dungeons and Dragons,” Leviathan begins slowly, “which, now that I’m looking–”

“–Our opening scene was awfully similar to this,” Abel finishes.

“Wait, are you saying you think we’re in your campaign?” Satan asks, eyes wide, and Leviathan nods.

“I mean, it makes total sense,” he says with budding excitement. “Like, I’m obviously supposed to be a ranger, Abel’s definitely an artificer, and Lucifer’s a total paladin. This is so cool, it’s like my dreams are being brought to life right before my eyes!”

Lucifer grimaces as he sits up, head splitting. It takes him longer than he’d like to admit to notice his surroundings, and by that, he means notice he and his brothers (and the new exchange student, Abel), are in a forest, and an unfamiliar one at that.

Now, this is concerning for several reasons, but the most pressing is because he could have sworn he had gone to sleep in his bed last night, in his favorite silk pajamas. Not whatever outfit he’s got on now. Black and red gauntlets weigh heavily on his arms, and as he looks, he notices he’s got a complete set of armor to match, completed with a variation of what seems to be his normal cloak. Beside him, in the dirt, sits an obsidian longsword with a matching shield bearing the Lamentation insignia.

He’s pulled out of his examinations by Mammon, who is now clad in a brown cloak with yellow lining, an instrument slung across his back. “Where the hell are we?”

“I… don’t know,” Lucifer says, hating the uncertainty. “Is everyone alright?”

Around him, his brothers all give out varying positive answers, all dressed as strangely as he and Mammon. Abel stands as well, brushing off leaves and dirt from their pants. They’re one of the more normally dressed, which isn’t saying much, but Lucifer thinks it’s a relief that he doesn’t have to worry about them being handed a weapon of some sort. Until he sees the dagger at their waist, sheathed in brown leather.

“This isn’t the Devildom,” Belphegor points out, and Lucifer spins around, still semi-awkward in the armor. As the most powerful demon in the Devildom, Lucifer never needed armor, and when he was an angel they were more or less protected by divine blessings. So he’s never worn anything quite like the get-up he’s got on now and wishes it could stay that way, as the weight and clunkiness isn’t exactly pleasant.

“Why are we here?” Satan asks, dark green robes swirling as he does his own examination of their surroundings.

“That, I do not know,” Lucifer says, swallowing his instinctive urge to act like he knows everything, like he’s in control. It wouldn’t do to appear more confident than he is, especially with so many unknowns still present. “Everybody should think back to what they were doing before you woke up here. Maybe something was triggered by one of our actions.”

“I was sleeping,” Belphegor volunteers, “so as you can imagine, I’m not exactly pleased to be here.”

“None of us are,” Mammon bites back, “so can it. And I was just watchin’ TV. Nothin’ related to whatever all this is.”

“I was editing one of my Devilgram posts,” Asmodeus says, examining his white tunic with a look of distaste. “And I really need to post it, like ASAP.”

“I was in the library,” Satan adds, “but nowhere near the cursed section.”

“Leviathan, Abel, what were you doing?” Lucifer prompts, and the two share a look.

“We were playing Dungeons and Dragons,” Leviathan begins slowly, “which, now that I’m looking–”

“–Our opening scene was awfully similar to this,” Abel finishes.

“Wait, are you saying you think we’re in your campaign?” Satan asks, eyes wide, and Leviathan nods.

“Okay, well stop nerdin’ out because it’s not my dream,” Mammon insists. “And what the hell am I supposed to be?”

“I think a bard,” Abel answers. “And I think Belphegor is supposed to be a rogue, Beelzebub is a barbarian, Satan is a wizard, and Asmodeus is a cleric.”

“I don’t know what any of that means,” Asmodeus says. “Are clerics, like cool or something?”

“Before we get into all of that,” Lucifer says, pinching at the bridge of his nose, “I think we should figure out how we got here. And why. Leviathan, where’d you get the game and what happened when you were setting up to play?”

“Well, Diavolo gave me the game,” Leviathan begins, and Lucifer chokes.

“Diavolo? You accepted a game from him? And played it? Leviathan, you know his penchant for practical jokes and games. That explains everything.”

“We were playing with Barbatos, too,” Abel says suddenly. “He was our DM. Why didn’t he come here with us too?”

“I’M AFRAID I AM STUCK IN THE GAME AS WELL,” a voice booms from the sky, and with a jolt, Lucifer realizes it’s Barbatos. “ONLY, I AM STILL THE DM.”

“This is so cool,” Leviathan whimpers, and Abel slaps him on the shoulder.

“Dude, focus!”

“Barbatos, do you know how we get out of here?” Lucifer asks, looking up into the disarmingly blue sky, so unlike the maroons and blacks of the Devildom.

“I DO NOT THINK WE CAN,” he replies regretfully, the ground shaking slightly as he speaks. “KNOWING DIAVOLO, THE ONLY WAY OUT IS THROUGH.”

“Through?” Abel yelps. “Like, through the entire campaign? That could take years!”

“I do not want to be stuck in here for years!” Asmodeus panics.

“NOT THE WHOLE CAMPAIGN. MOST LIKELY ONLY THROUGH THE SESSION.”

“Oh, that’s a relief,” Leviathan says.

“How long would that take?”

“Well, we’re all kind of OP, so probably only a few days,” he answers, and Belphegor makes a low noise of protest.

“A few days?” Beelzebub rumbles mournfully. “What am I supposed to eat here? I’m hungry!”

“I’m sure we can find some lodgings with some food or something. Maybe there’s an inn or tavern nearby,” Leviathan suggests.

“A PATH STRETCHES OUT IN FRONT OF YOU,” Barbatos intones, and Lucifer, watches disbelieving, as the air shimmers, revealing a dirt path stretching on into the distance. Now, he’s seen a lot of things in his time in the realms, but never anything quite like this.

“I’ll bet that leads into town,” Abel breaks the silence. “Maybe we should go down it?” They turn to Lucifer expectantly, and for once, he has no desire to be in control, feeling more out of his depth than he has in a long time.

“I will leave this up to you and Leviathan,” he says, clearing his throat. “You do have the most experience, after all.”

“That we do,” Leviathan nods, and it doesn’t escape Lucifer’s notice that he’s been smiling this entire time. This truly is a dream come true for him, and Lucifer just hopes he won’t get too overeager and get them in trouble.

“Perhaps once we find lodging you can explain more of this… Dungeons and Dragons stuff to the rest of us,” he suggests.

“For once, I agree with Lucifer,” Satan agrees, lip curling. “I’d like to know what exactly being a wizard entails.”

“Well, I definitely think that going down the path would be best,” Abel says, with surprising initiative. In the Devildom, they hadn’t been quite so outspoken, seemingly more anxious and hesitant. “It’s there for a reason.”

“I agree,” Leviathan says with a nod.

“But which way should we go down it?” Asmodeus asks. “It goes in either direction, and like, I don’t want to end up going away from town.”

“How will we find a way to get there?” Belphegor asks, and Leviathan snaps his fingers excitedly.

“I’ll bet there’s a marker! Barbatos?”

“ROLL FOR PERCEPTION,” Barbatos instructs, and a moment later, a giant semi-transparent die appears, floating in front of Leviathan. Without hesitation, he plucks it from the air, throwing it down to the ground gently. It rolls across the path, coming to a stop by Satan, who steps back a few feet, away from it.

“It’s a twelve,” Leviathan pronounces, and the die disappears into thin air, quickly as it had appeared. “And as a ranger… I have a plus four modifier. So sixteen.”

“YOU NOTICE A SIGN WITH AN ARROW POINTING EAST WITH ‘TOWN’ WRITTEN ON IT.”

“Nice,” Abel cheers. “Looks like we know which way to go now.”

“What was all of that?” Beelzebub asks. “Why did that die have so many sides?”

“That was a D20,” Leviathan replies, slinging his bow over his shoulder, “so it had twenty sides. They’re used to roll for checks, like I just did, in battles, and a lot of other cases. In Dungeons and Dragons, most aspects are determined by dice rolls. Multiple dice are used, and they’re all used for different things.” He pauses, taking in everyone’s blank expressions. “I’m losing, you, aren’t I? Whatever. Let’s just get to lodgings and I’ll explain everything as clearly as I can there.”

The trek to the inn doesn’t take very long at all, but by the end, everyone seems tired and weary. Asmodeus’ complaints about his feet hurting fill Lucifer’s ears, but he focuses more on Abel, who looks confident and alert. Despite being the one who “chose” them and all, Lucifer honestly hasn’t paid much attention to them, besides the necessary. He’s polite and accommodating, yes, but truly, because he’s so busy he hasn’t really had time to get to know them.

Even for a human, Abel seems fairly weak. They don’t have any special powers or any great strength, and though they are diligent and studious, nothing about them has really piqued Lucifer’s interest. Now, he’s a little concerned. He and his brothers all have powers and skills that will hopefully make traversing through this land easier, but they have no such thing. Aside from their knowledge, they’re practically useless.

Meaning, that for the good of the Devildom, it falls upon Lucifer’s shoulders to ensure they make it out of the game unharmed.

Once they’re all settled in a room with various bunk beds, quite similar to a Human Realm hostel, they make their way down to the dining hall.

“AT THE BAR, YOU SEE A MYSTERIOUS-LOOKING HALF-ORC,” Barbatos booms, and Lucifer startles, still unused to his unseen presence. No one else in the hall reacts, so he assumes he’s audible to only them. “AS YOU WATCH, SHE DOWNS A MUG OF ALE WITH A MELANCHOLIC AIR.”

“Who cares,” Satan grumbles. “None of my business.”

“That’s not how it works in Dungeons and Dragons,” Abel says patiently. “Side characters are often vessels that take us to the next part of our journey. They usually need help or something, and then there’s typically a reward that benefits us for helping.”

“That’s dumb,” Asmodeus says, crossing his arms.

“How about you all order food–poor Beelzebub looks like he’s going to faint–while Leviathan and I deal with the half-orc,” Abel suggests helpfully, and Lucifer nods.

“Yes. Let us all find a booth while they deal with her,” he directs, and everyone sits down. “Before we order, let’s figure out much money we have left after renting the room. I really wouldn’t like to find out what sort of punishment we’d receive for being unable to pay our tab.”

“I miss Goldie,” Mammon groans, digging through his pockets.

In the end, they have a small pile of coins, but since Lucifer is completely ignorant as to what each coin is worth, he has to resort to flagging down a passing barmaid to inquire. Thankfully, it’s a decent amount and they waste no time placing an order.

“No ale,” Lucifer says before one of his brothers can do something stupid. It would do them no good to try to maneuver through this world whilst drunk.

Once the barmaid disappears, Lucifer’s left to watch Leviathan and Abel. He can just barely hear them speaking to the half-orc.

“THE HALF-ORC IS HESITANT TO SPEAK WITH YOU,” Barbatos says, and Lucifer still can’t get over how nobody else but them hears him. “YOU MUST PASS A PERSUASION CHECK.”

Again, that blue die appears. In an act apparently also not visible to the general public, Leviathan rolls it. From his vantage point, Lucifer can’t see the number, but it’s evidently not good if the way Leviathan’s shoulders slump is any indication.

“Nine,” he says, “and I don’t get anything else.”

“YOUR ATTEMPTS ARE UNSUCCESSFUL.” As Lucifer watches, the half-orc gives Leviathan a wary look, turning her whole upper body away in a clear dismissal. “THE HALF-ORC CALLS FOR ANOTHER MUG.”

“Okay, well that didn’t work,” Leviathan says, returning to the table. “Damn my lack of charisma!”

“I can try,” Abel suggests. “Though as an artificer, my Charisma isn’t any higher. I’m worried I might make it worse by rolling low. Plus, I’m already not great at talking to people I don’t know.”

“She doesn’t look like she’s going anywhere,” Lucifer points out after a moment, “so why don’t you and Leviathan explain everything as quickly and succinctly as you’re able so the rest of us can add our input.”

What follows is a somewhat confusing explanation of the races, classes, fights, checks, and honestly a handful of other things Lucifer struggles to wrap his brain around. It all makes sense, but it’s just… a lot. All at once.

“So, out of all of us, who would have the best persuasion modifier, or whatever it’s called?” Satan asks, and Leviathan thinks for a moment.

“Probably Lucifer, to be honest. I’ll bet he’s got a plus three for Charisma.”

“Me?” Lucifer echoes, surprised. “Does that mean I need to talk to that half-orc?”

“Well, you should at least roll for it,” Abel says as if it’s the logical next course of action. Lucifer supposes it sort of is.

“Alright,” he says, standing up and approaching the half-orc. “I want to make a roll for persuasion.”

The die appears in front of him, and he reaches out. It’s not exactly corporeal, but it does have a weight to it, and Lucifer throws it on the ground as he’d seen Leviathan do. It rolls to a stop, showing a thirteen. He reads the number out, and Leviathan pumps his fist.

“Nice! You’ve got a plus three, so that makes sixteen!”

Out of twenty? That’s pretty good, then. Right?

“THE HALF-ORC TURNS TO YOU, UNPROMPTED.”

“You look like a good listener,” she says, and Lucifer realizes she had done exactly what Barbatos had said. Placing himself in the chair next to her, Lucifer tries for a welcoming face. “And like a strong worrier,” she continues, appraising him. “Do you think you could help me?”

“I could definitely try,” Lucifer says, and she finally sets her mug down, sighing heavily.

“My name is Shelley, and my troubles all started three weeks ago,” the half-orc, Shelley, says. “My garden was thriving, in the prime of its life! But then he came, and ruined it all.”

“He?”

“A three-headed beast,” she says lowly, clenching her fist. Lucifer watches the muscles all of the way up her arm ripple and supposes he’s glad he rolled high. “Apparently, he liked my garden. Enough to frolic everywhere in it and ruin all of my plants! My tomatoes are trampled, my flowers flattened, and my squash, well, they’re squashed. It’s awful!”

Out of everything Lucifer has expected her to say, this was definitely not it. “That sounds terrible,” he says, channeling the same energy as when he listens to student complaints regarding R.A.D. during open meetings. “Have you tried fighting him?”

“Oh, yes,” Shelley shakes her head, “but he is too strong for me and my friends. But you and your pals, well, you look like seasoned adventures! Do you think you could help me?”

Lucifer follows her gaze to his brothers and Abel, who do look pretty badass. Well, they would, if they weren’t all visibly invested in their conversation, with Leviathan going as far as to mouth ‘Say yes! Say yes!” fairly obviously.

“I think that’s doable,” he agrees, returning his attention to Shelley. “Tomorrow, should we meet here? Then you can lead us to your house and garden?”

“Works for me. I cannot thank you enough, young adventurer,” she says gratefully. “I will see you at ten.”

“HAVING AGREED TO HELP SHELLEY, LUCIFER RETURNS TO HIS TABLE TO SHARE THE GOOD NEWS,” Barbatos booms, and Lucifer finds his feet moving automatically.

“That was awesome,” Abel says quickly, and Lucifer doesn’t know why their praise hits them so differently from everyone else’s. Is it because they are just a human, and it is only natural that they should be impressed by him, or is it because they are stroking his ego, fanning his pride?

“Nice going!” Leviathan cheers, holding out his hand for a high five. Begrudgingly, Lucifer obliges him. “So what exactly are we doing?”

The next morning dawns bright and cheery, but they do not.

“I can’t believe we’re still stuck here,” Asmodeus complains. “The showers here are communal. Communal! And there’s no body lotion or conditioner or anything! On top of that, I’m expected to put on the same clothes I was wearing yesterday? This is absolutely barbaric!”

“I want to go back to bed,” Belphegor interjects. “I was forced to be awake all of yesterday and now today too? When are we getting back to the Devildom?”

“I’m hungry,” Beelzebub adds on, and Lucifer sighs, pinching at the bridge of his nose. That damned headache from yesterday still hasn’t cleared up completely.

“The quicker we take care of this quest the quicker we can get back to the Devildom,” Abel says, already dressed and ready. “So chop chop, because if we’re not downstairs soon, we won’t have enough time for breakfast before we leave.”

That, at least, sent Beelzebub into motion.

“You’re taking this all surprisingly well,” Lucifer says to Abel, who startles.

“Well,” they scratch their neck awkwardly, “this isn’t the first time I’ve been transported into a strange new world.”

“Ah, yes,” Lucifer says. “I apologize that you have to go through this. This shouldn’t have been a task of yours, as your duties were just to complete your tasks and go through your classes. But Lord Diavolo has always had a strange sense of humor.”

They hum. “I mean, it’s not like I mind it too much. I’m definitely not having as much fun as Leviathan, but I think this will be a good chance for us all to grow closer. Though we’re all living under the same roof, I haven’t exactly had a chance to grow close with anyone besides Leviathan. I feel like I especially don’t know you, since you’re so busy.”

Lucifer hasn’t known they had noticed, or even cared about his absence. “I’m sorry about that–” he begins but is swiftly cut off.

“No, don’t apologize,” Abel says, holding out their hands. “It wasn’t my intention to make you feel guilty. I know how incredibly busy you are, what with all your work running this family, for Diavolo, and as the student council president. Honestly, you make me feel guilty,” they continue with a self-deprecating chuckle. “I feel like I don’t do enough for the exchange program in comparison.”

“I don’t think that’s true,” Lucifer says, semi-awkwardly. It’s been so long since someone has pointed out all of his duties, let alone praised him for completing them. To him, they’re just his duties, so he forgets that the burden he takes on is actually quite sizeable. “You have been scoring well in your classes and you stay on track with your tasks. That’s all you should be doing, considering you’re just a human and all.”

“Just a human?” they question, raising their eyebrow. “Now, what do you mean by that?”

“Not any offense, I assure you. Just that, in the Devildom, it would be quite difficult for you to do more than that,” he amends, but Abel doesn’t look assuaged.

“Difficult?”

“You know–” and here, Lucifer blames his lack of adequate rest and stress of being in a stressful situation for his words “–humans are quite fragile. Especially compared to demons, let alone demons as powerful as myself and my brothers.”

“Seriously? That’s what you think of humans?” Abel says lightly, but he can tell they’re offended. “Just because we don’t have powers or live a long, long time doesn’t make us weak.”

“Objectively speaking,” Lucifer begins, but thankfully, before he can dig himself into even an even deeper hole, Mammon interrupts.

“We’re all ready, so let’s go.”

Silently, Lucifer allows Abel to go first, following them out of their room and down the stairs. They grab a quick breakfast of bread and butter, then wait for Shelley. She arrives right at ten, apparently unaffected by the large quantity of alcohol he’s ingested the night before.

“Good, you’ve arrived!” she says, introducing herself to everyone. “I can’t thank you enough for helping me. My house is only a short trek from here, so if you’re all ready to go…”

“We are,” Lucifer confirms, hoisting his bag. His armor is still annoying, but he finds it’s getting in his way less and less as he grows more accustomed to it. Everyone else gathers their things, and they follow Shelley out of the tavern and through town.

As they walk, Shelley explains some of the town's background, which honestly, Lucifer couldn’t care less about. Leviathan and Satan, on the other hand, are engaged, asking questions attentively.

“My arms hurt,” Belphegor complains, and wordlessly, Beelzebub takes his pack, slinging it over his shoulder. Lucifer supposes that’s better than the alternative, which is him picking up Belphegor and slinging him over his shoulder. “Thanks.”

“No problem,” Beelzebub says kindly. “Hey, Abel, I can carry your bag too, if you want?”

Abel looks up. “Thanks, but I don’t mind the weight.”

“It looks pretty heavy,” Belphegor points out, and they smile.

“It’s not too bad. There’s lots of cool stuff in it and I don’t want to make Beelzebub carry any more weight.”

If it were anyone else, any of Lucifer’s brothers, they’d have taken Beelzebub up on his offer without any hesitation. The consideration is unusual, but Lucifer is glad to see it being extended, as Beelzebub already bears more weight than the rest of them combined if the thick and wicked armor he’s wearing weighs anything close to what it looks like it should.

“My house is right up ahead,” Shelley calls, gathering their attention. Lucifer follows her gesture to the very last house on the road, set a bit away from the others to make room for the sprawling garden. The garden that is very clearly in disarray.

“Bastard,” Shelley spits as they get close, bending down to examine a smushed flower bed. “He’s done more damage since last night.”

“Where is this beast?” Lucifer asks, placing a hand on the hilt of his sword. He still doesn’t really have a clue how to use it, but it makes him feel better.

“Probably around back,” Shelley says, nodding to the back of her house. “Do you really think you can take of him?”

“Doubtlessly,” he answers, placing a hand on her shoulder. “But you should probably go back into town. I have no idea what this battle will look like and I’d hate for you to be caught in the crossfire.”

She hesitates, but Lucifer is insistent. He’d really rather not have her witness the absolute fools of themselves they’re about to make fighting this beast.

“Fine,” she eventually agrees. “Meet me in the tavern when you’re done. And please, please don’t destroy any more of my garden.”

“We’ll do our best,” Abel cuts in, looking up at Shelley comfortingly. “I’m sure we’ll meet up with you in no time at all.”

Oddly enough, it seems like Shelly’s more convinced by Abel than him, though Lucifer's not sure exactly why that would be. Once she’s a good distance away, he turns to the rest of his brothers.

“I suppose we should get ready for battle, or whatever,” he says, doing his best to channel all the confidence he can. This is just another chapter in their crazy lives; who cares that they don’t know what they’re doing or what the repercussions of getting injured/killed will be?

“Okay, let’s leave our packs up here,” Leviathan says, “so take what’s essential out of them and leave the rest.”

Around him, everyone begins getting ready. Lucifer already has his sword and shield, so he figures that’s good, but the others need a little more time. As he watches, Abel pats down their side, checking that their pistols are still there, then digs through the rest of their bag, dumping it out on the grass. It really did have a lot packed in there.

Selecting a few items, they throw them into their pockets, but for the life of him, Lucifer cannot figure out what they’re doing.

“Is there a method to this madness?” he asks, stepping forward. Abel looks up, shading their eyes from the sun. Instinctively, Lucifer shifts, blocking the sun from their face, then pauses. Why had he just done that?

“To be honest, there’s not,” Abel answers frankly, with wry humor. “But I’m an artificer, so I should be able to do something with this stuff, right?” Upon seeing the uncomprehending look on his face, they elaborate. “Well, my talents lie in using infusing magic with everyday items so who knows which of these items will be handy.”

“I see,” Lucifer says. “But I can’t imagine we will have much use for you in this fight.”

Rising to their feet, Abel puts their hands on their hips. “What do you mean by that? Is this your whole ‘humans are fragile’ thing again?”

“I mean,” Lucifer says, “look around. This is not the first conflict my brothers and I have fought in. You, on the other hand, don’t even have the strength to open a jar.”

“Okay, that was one time. An outlier. So it shouldn’t be counted.” The spirited look in their eyes is captivating. When was the last time Lucifer’d seen such all-consuming passion, let felt it? His days in the Devildom had fallen into a scheduled monotony–even his brothers’ antics were becoming predictable. “And I do have things to bring to the table! Otherwise, why would you have picked my application?”

Lucifer swallows his impulsive words. It would not do for them to find out the truth, nor for it to get back to Diavolo’s ears.

“Just stay back,” he says instead. “It’s my duty to keep you safe and that is absolutely something I will do.”

When they’re all finally ready, Lucifer takes the lead, moving quietly around the house's edge. The expanse of the backyard stretches for quite a distance until it meets a forest that is thick and dense. Plants sprawl everywhere, and Lucifer quickly realizes the vegetables and flowers Shelley had mentioned were fairly different from their Human Realm counterparts, namely in size.

“Holy shit,” Abel breathes, and with a jolt Lucifer realizes they’ve moved to the front of the group, standing next to him. “Those pumpkins are huge!”

“What are you doing up here?” Lucifer hisses, and they give him a stubborn look, even as they swallow nervously. Thir orneriness is… something else.

“I can be helpful!” they insist. “I’m not going to let you sideline me!”

“Even though it’s for your own safety?”

“You don’t get to tell me what to do,” Abel argues, louder, and Beelzebub makes a quiet shushing noise. They pay him no mind, continuing on. “I know you’re used to being in charge, but I’m not your younger sibling. You can’t order me around.”

“Believe me,” Lucifer says angrily, “I do not see you as my sibling!”

Before he can go on, a howl rips through the air, bouncing off of the foliage. He freezes, looking around, but the large plants block his view, and Shelley’s plea to avoid damaging more prevents him from just taking them all down.

“YOU’VE AWOKEN THE BEAST,” Barbatos speaks, and Abel flinches. “YOU SEE MOVEMENT TO THE LEFT. CRASHING AND GROWLING CAN BE HEARD AND AS YOU WATCH, HE EMERGES.”

It’s exactly as he says. A large black paw appears, followed by not one, but three snouts. As the beast moves forward, Lucifer can’t believe what he’s seeing.

“Cerberus?” Asmodeus gasps, confirming that yes, the beast terrorizing Shelley is, in fact, his guard dog.

But this beast is not his Cerberus, at least not in this world, because it gives no indication of recognition, merely advancing threateningly. Drool drips down from one of his muzzles, splashing off of a leaf on the way down.

“Cerberus?” Abel squeaks questioningly, but they don’t retreat.

“Our guard dog,” Satan replies blankly.

“No,” Lucifer corrects. “This is not our Cerberus. And will not listen to us.”

“Oh, great.” Leviathan’s voice is suspiciously high-pitched. “Our first battle and it’s with an A-class monster.”

With an angry bark (from all three mouths), Cerberus leaps forward, into a run. Everyone scatters, but Lucifer, who draws his sword, shouts “I slash at the beast, driving him back!”

Around him, time freezes, and the D20 die appears. He awkwardly rolls the die, sword tucked under his arm, then reads off the result once he’s got his sword back in hand. “Thirteen.”

“YOU SLASH AT THE BEAST, AND THE HIT JUST BARELY LANDS.”

In a flash of movent, time unfreezes, and his body’s moving without his permission, doing what Barbatos outlines. Cerberus yelps, and Lucifer tries to ignore how wrong it feels to attack a beloved pet, focusing more on how it looks like it wants to kill him.

“YOU MUST ROLL FOR DAMAGE,” Barbatos says, and a different die appears, one with eight sides. Lucifer rolls it, getting a three, which with his strength modifier makes five.

The beast yelps, but the small wound doesn’t deter him much. With a snarl, he’s back in motion, but moves past him, towards Asmodeus, who screams.

“I bludgeon the, uh, left head!” Satan yells, shoving Asmodeus back before Lucifer can get there. In a flash–and Lucifer realizes only much later that time must have frozen for Satan to roll all of his dice and everything–Satan’s quarterstaff connects soundly, allowing him and Asmodeus time to get out of the immediate attack range.

Cerberus tries his paw at attacking Belphie, who barely manages to evade, then Mammon, who must have rolled poorly, for he receives a claw to the chest, raking bloody lines down his chest.

“Mammon!” Lucifer moves forward without thinking, rushing to Mammon’s side. Thankfully, he’s still conscious, but clearly in pain. Cerberus howls, getting ready for another attack upon his wounded prey, but Lucifer intercepts.

“I slash at the chest of the beast!” he shouts, and again, time freezes. Lucifer rolls the die, blood running cold when he sees the low number. “Three.”

“YOU ATTEMPT TO SWING, BUT MISS. CERBERUS’S TEETH DIG INTO YOUR ARM AND TEAR. YOU PASS OUT FROM THE PAIN ALMOST IMMEDIATELY.” Barbatos’ voice shakes slightly as he says this, and almost in slow-motion, time unfreezes. The anticipation is the worst of it. The knowing that he’ll miss, even as his body futilely tries to attack, is horrible and he braces himself for the pain best that he can.

But before Cerberus’ teeth make contact with the space between his arm and shoulder plate, a small body slams into him, forcing him to the side. Abel, who he’d forgotten about in the heat of the battle, quickly gets back on their feet, panting.

“What are you doing?” They yell. “Get up, get out of the way!”

Lucifer does as they instruct, rolling to the side right as Cerberus comes down where he’d been sprawled out moments before. In his haste to get up, he drops his sword and shield, but leaves them, trying to put some distance between himself and the enormous beast.

From his periphery, he sees Abel pull something from their pocket. “I use my artisan's tool to make this make the sound of a dog’s squeaker!” The thing in their hand begins to omit a high-pitched squeaking, and almost immediately, Cerberus turns on them. “I then throw this as hard and as far as I can into the woods!”

“YOU MUST ROLL FOR ATHLETICS.”

The D20 appears, and Abel rolls it; apparently, time is no longer frozen to roll. “Fifteen plus two, so seventeen!”

“YOU PITCH THE TOY AS HARD AS YOU CAN AND IT GOES SAILING INTO THE WOODS.”

With a loud call of “here, boy!” accompanied by a squeeze of the makeshift chew toy, Abel launches the toy into the air. Cerberus chases after it, and Lucifer winces as he takes down a couple of cucumber plants, sending the fruit rolling.

“What the fuck?” Asmodeus’ question hangs in the air as they all stare after the beast.

“Oh thank god, it worked,” Abel says, and Lucifer rounds on them.

“You didn’t know if it would work?”

Abel looks too worn out to argue with him. “Nothing else was working, now, was it? And anyway, you should be thanking me. I saved your ass.”

“Yeah, how did you do that?” Satan asks, raising his eyebrows, and for once, he and Lucifer are thinking the same thing. How did they get over to him fast enough, let alone even know that he had rolled poorly?

Abel shrugs. “I was right next to him and I guess the angle was off or something. I don’t know, something in my gut just told me to move.”

The explanation, as weak as it is, seems like the only one they can offer. Abel looks just as taken aback by the turn of events as everyone else. Before the conversation can continue, a familiar crashing becomes audible, and they all immediately jump into defensive positions. But when Cerberus appears again, he doesn’t go for the attack, merely dropping the toy at Abel’s feet with an expectant bark from the middle head.

“Stay back,” Lucifer warns, but Abel ignores him.

“He’s not violent,” they dismiss. “I want to pet him.”

“What?” Beelzebub yelps. “No way!”

“ROLL FOR UH, ANIMAL HANDLING,” Barbatos says unsurely, and the D20 appears in front of them. They roll the die, gasping at the result. “Eighteen, and I have a plus one in animal handling.”

“So nineteen,” Leviathan says, sounding completely shocked.

“CERBERUS EAGERLY LEANS INTO YOUR TOUCH, COMPLETELY TAMED. IT SEEMS AS IF HE HAS CHOSEN ABEL AS HIS NEW MASTER.”

Abel grins as they reach up, stretching to rub the right head’s neck. Cerberus pants happily, tail wagging.

“We… did it?” Belphegor questions. “Holy shit, we did it!”

They spend a moment celebrating, which is quickly interrupted.

“Uh, guys, still bleedin’ out here!” Mammon calls, and oh yeah, they’ve got to get him treated.

Once Mammon is quickly and neatly bandaged up by the same barmaid that’d served them the night before (whose other job is apparently at the apothecary), they stake Cerberus up outside and meet back up with Shelley, who jumps up upon seeing them.

“You did it!”

“We did,” Lucifer confirms, and is quickly wrapped up in a friendly hug. Well, relatively friendly. He almost suffocates under her biceps.

“Thank you so much,” she says, going around and shaking everyone’s hand. “As a token of my gratitude, please have this pouch of gold. It’s not much, and definitely not all that you deserve, but it’s what I have.”

Mammon eagerly takes the pouch before Lucifer can decline, and the tavern shimmers around them.

“CONGRATULATIONS FOR COMPLETING THE QUEST: CERBERUS AND DEFEATING THE BEAST,” Barbatos says, and a bright flash overtakes the room. When he can finally see again, Lucifer realizes he’s sprawled out on the floor of Leviathan’s floor, again with everyone else. This time, Barbatos is there too.

“We made it back!” Belphegor exclaims, getting to his feet.

“Thank fuck,” Satan exhales. “Leviathan if you don’t burn that stupid thing, I’m going to!”

Leviathan pouts. “Aw, really? But I had fun.”

“Destroy it,” Lucifer orders. “Or I’ll destroy you.”

“I must be getting back to the castle,” Barbatos says stiffly as Beelzebub helps him up. “I have some choice words for Lord Diavolo I must share.”

“Oh, believe me,” Lucifer says darkly, “you’re not alone in that. But first, I think I need a nice, long nap. How long has it been since we first were transported into the game?”

Checking his PC screen, Leviathan makes a noise of surprise. “Only about five minutes!”

“Yay!” Asmodeus declares. “I can still upload my post.”

They all separate then, drifting off to recuperate and resettle on their own, as they tend to do. Lucifer finds himself alone in the hall with Abel, and before he can chicken out, he calls out their name. It’s best to get this over with now, rather than let it linger. Fester.

“You shouldn’t have done that. Jumped in front of me.”

They turn slowly, and that was not what Lucifer meant to say. He mean to thank them, to not be an asshole for once, but he’s learned that around Abel, his mouth moves on its own.

“You were going to be seriously injured. Killed, probably.”

“I had armor.”

They scowl, looking past him. “We both know that would have done nothing. I saved you from dying. You should be grateful. Or what, is your pride too strong to let a human save you?”

Their sneer nettles him. “That’s not it. You could have been killed!”

It’s only when Abel’s silent that he realizes what he said. Heat fans over his cheeks, and he searches for a way to amend his words.

“So, you do care,” they say carefully before he can speak. “And here I thought I was nothing but a nuisance to you.”

“Nobody wants to see someone die in front of them.” It’s a deflection, and they both know it.“Thank you for, ah, saving me,” he tries. “And for your other contributions throughout that little… adventure.”

“Oh!” They rock back, surprised. “Uh, yeah. I guess humans aren’t as weak and fragile as you thought, huh?”

“Well, the jury’s still out on that,” he replies wryly, “but you definitely aren’t.”

The conversation lulls there, and sensing it’s over, Abel goes to turn and continue down the hall. Unable to let that happen, Lucifer reached out and catches their sleeve.

“Sorry,” he apologizes quickly. “I just– Would you like to do something this week? Get to know one another better?”

“Taken out of context it sounds like you’re asking me on a date,” they mutter, and Lucifer’s face flames even more.

“I didn’t mean–”

“I’d like that. Either way,” they say, beginning to make their way to their room. It takes Lucifer a second to get their meaning, but when he finally does, Abel’s already shut the door behind him.

It takes him even longer to realize that he’s fine with–no, would prefer it–if it was a date.

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