#because loki would've snapped him like a twig

[wolfish-trickster]

Young Oak Sapling

Part 2 to this (I seriously need to stop writing accidental multichapter fics...)

Loki x female!reader

Word count: 1,7K

Warnings: typos (as always), angst, fluff (it's there, I promise!)

Tag list: @gaitwae @lucywrites02 @hard-to-be-the-bard @birdgirl90 @laramoonworld @forevernthensome @kozkaboi

A/N: this is really messy, i'm sorry

'You have always been like a little sister I always wanted. I'm so sorry, we can still be friends'

For some unknown reason he kept having dreams about that one evening. 'Dreams,' he would scoff, 'more like nightmares.' They always end horribly. Either with you never talking to him again out of shame or him delivering those lines not so gently.

Loki couldn't understand why he kept dreaming about it. About her. How the light in her eyes slowly died when he told her. He told her the truth, right? It was the right thing to do, right?

*

She was hanging out with that soldier again. Loki's mouth twisted into disgusted grimace when he spot how he put his arm around her shoulders, how she held the single dandelion he gave her. A dandelion? Please, he couldn't really fall that low to give a lady some common weed, could he? A lady with such charm and class like Y/N deserves a dozen roses for every day she blessed this world with her smile and laugh.

Loki's eyes widened. Why was he thinking of her like that so suddenly? He never thought of her like that before. No. She's just a friend. Like his little sister. That's what he told her. She believed him. Now he has to believe it himself.

*

Sudden rain drove Loki away from his new favourite sitting spot in the corner of the garden. The oak stump. If only he kept a part of the tree. A twig or a leaf. He would've carried it around like a talisman. Or acorn, so he could grow another oak, even though it wouldn't be the same one.

His mind was on autopilot, he didn't even realize his legs carried him to your bedroom door. He stood there like a statue. Listening for any sounds. For any voices. He heard nothing. You must be somewhere else. That realization made him even more anxious. You could be with that soldier again. He can't have that.

He walked to only place he could always find you: library. As he wanted to open the heavy door you ran into him, colliding into his chest.

"Sorry-" your relax expression changed when you looked up into his eyes

"Hi," he smiled softly.

"Hello," you greeted, but without a smile. You tried to walk by him when he stopped you with his hand on your shoulder.

"Why are you running away from me?"

"I'm not. It's just.... this," you gestured between him and you, "it's awkward."

"Oh, so you avoid me, your oldest friend, and spend your entire day with Hofferson then," Loki crossed his arms on his chest.

"Aren't you supposed to be on a date or something?" you pushed yourself pass him, poison in your voice.

"Aren't you supposed to spend some time with me too?"

"I can't Loki. I'm trying to get rid of all of my feelings for you! I can't be near you if I want it to work!" you nearly screamed in his face.

Those words hurt Loki more than he thought. "Getting rid of ALL feelings? So you're trying to hate me then."

"No! Understand that I can't be friends with someone I love!"

"Platonic love exists too, you know," Loki remarked.

You rolled your eyes. "Whatever. I don't want to argue with you anymore, I'm going."

"Where?" he asked as you escaped him.

"To someone that cares about me, and not just platonicly!" you shouted behind your back and ran.

*

He hasn't had a word or a single alone time with you since then. You were always near that soldier, always talking to him, hugging him, hanging on his arm all the time.

Loki felt nausea whenever he saw Y/N with anyone but him. He wasn't used to seeing Y/N with other men, she was always near him. He missed her. Her laugh, her smile, her hugs. Everything.

No matter how many girls or boys he came across on streets, none of them could ever take your place. None of them smiled as brightly or as truly as you always did. Even when he was telling you about anyone he was interested in, you still smiled and wished him well with the person. You wanted him to be happy, even if it hurt you.

So why can't he do the same? Be happy you're with someone who will love you? Instead he grits his teeth whenever he sees the two of you together. Why does he want you all to himself? Why the thought of you being with someone else makes him throw up?

Loki sighed and held his head in his hands. It is true what they say. You'll realize you love somebody only after you lose them.

*

He felt like a coward. Standing in front of your bedroom door, with heart anxiously pounding in his chest.

Loki took a deep breath and knocked. No one answered. You must be out again. With him.

He shook the thought away and opened the door. If anything, he'll at least be able to give you a message without having to look into your eyes. While he was looking for a piece of paper and a pen around your room he noticed a new pot on your windowsill. It was brown and smaller than the rest with a single tiny green sprout sticking from the dirt.

Loki took the pot in his hand, it was small enough to fit into his palm. He smiled. It was so tiny and fragile. He wondered what kind of plant it was.

Before he could use one of the runes to find out a door creaked open behind him. "What are you doing here?" you asked. He was so startled by you catching him he couldn't even deduce if you were angry or surprised to see him.

"I-I wanted to talk to you," he turned towards you.

You looked at his hand. "Why are you holding it? Put it back, you might break it!" before he could even move you rushed to him, took the pot from his hand and held it close to your chest. Could one be jealous when a plant gets a cuddle but her oldest friend doesn't? Apparently Loki could.

"What do you want to talk about? If it's some noble lady I don't want to hear it," you turned your head away from him.

Loki shook his head. "No, it's not a lady."

"Some son of a sailor then?"

"No, I came here to tell you something."

You turned your head back to him. "And what is that?"

Loki took a deep breath. It's now or never. "I came to a realization. And not just a common one. I didn't think my life could be so lonely without you in it. Every single day I've missed you, longed to spend time with you again. Laugh with you. It pained me to see that Hofferson boy with you. Ever since I saw the two of you in the stables I wanted to rip you away from him. Just like I every boy you got close to in our childhood. For a long time I couldn't understand why I wanted you all to myself and no other man. But now I do. It's because I love you. Romantically. Just like you love me," he didn't look away from you. He didn't dare.

You shook your head in disapointment. "You're so selfish, Loki."

He didn't expect that answer. It was far away from anything he was expecting. All blood left his face. "Well, that's what love makes out of person. It makes them selfish, possesive."

"So how come I could let you go after your monthly interests without complaining like you did?"

Loki froze. "Y-you're apparently a better person than me," he picked on his palm.

You hummed. "So...what now?"

Loki took your lack of emotions as a rejection. He concluded he traded places with you. Now you were the one without romantic feelings and he was the one being rejected.

He couldn't keep looking at the love of his life rejecting him. He studied the pot in her hamds instead. "Now? I guess I will have to find a spell to erase all romantic feelings I have for you and wish you all the best with Hoffer-I mean Arne," he thanked all heavens above for his training that didn't let him fall apart in front of you.

You looked at him, fear in your eyes." Why would you do that?"

Loki laughed. It was a bitter one, filled with sadness. "Because you don't love me anymore."

"That's not true," you whispered.

Loki's head snapped up. "What?"

"I-I said that's not true. I never stopped, no matter how much I tried. I even saved a little part of our tree," you said softly and caressed the little sprout.

"That's from the old oak?"

You nodded. "For some reason I couldn't just cut it down and erase its whole existence."

Now Loki knows what it means when a stone falls from someone's heart. "So, that means you still love me?" he asked hopefully.

You nodded. "And you love me too?"

"Of course my love. Can we please start over again?"

"I would love to," you blessed him with your kindest, purest smile.

"Can I kiss you?" he asked a little too excited.

"No," his heart fell to the floor, "you have to kiss me."

Loki sighed from relief. He walked over to you and cupped your cheeks. From up close your eyes were even more beautiful than he noticed the first time he kissed you. He reminded himself to tell you everyday from now on.

And just like that, the history repeated itself. Loki gently placed his lips on yours in a loving kiss. Your head spinned once again just like so many years ago. And one oak tree witnessed it all.

#loki x reader #loki #loki odinson #loki laufeyson #loki fluff #loki x female reader #loki angst #loki x reader angst