#bigfoot pirates haunt my balls

[drchucktingle]

you can write whatever the HELL you want

#chuck tingle #tingleverse #buckaroo lifestyle #i think you should leave #bigfoot pirates haunt my balls

[power-handmaiden]

Day 25: Bigfoot Pirates Haunt My Balls

Another podcast episode, and another one I enjoyed. I may have gotten off on a bad foot with the podcast but I'm going to miss it when I've listened to the last episode in my reading order.

Tingleverse note: this one also mentions a bigfoot president, though not by name, and that he was well-liked. Is this the same President Yuldok who sent the USA to war for at least 4 years? And they still like him in the future? If so, this alternate America isn't much better than the one on our timeline, after all...

That's beside the point, though. This is a much more conventional haunting story than "My Ass Is Haunted By The Gay Unicorn Colonel"- one about confronting unresolved feelings of the dead rather than the living. So, I know this sentence is going to come out sounding very silly, but bear with me: it feels unexpectedly affirming to see a horny gay ghost story. A lot of us face a block, even when we've embraced being out and proud about our romantic relationships and our sexualities as identity labels, where it's hard to see sexual desire as something important. In a ghost story like this, it's undeniable that a ghost's unfinished business is something important. Yes, it is a tragedy that these pirates never got to express their gay desires while they were alive! It's cathartic to acknowledge and to see them finally fulfill their desires.

#2024 tingles my butt #chuck tingle

[ofliterarynature]

2021 Wrap Up

I started the year with a goal of 120 books, which I blew way past! I couldn’t possibly talk about all of them, so I’ll stick to my favorites and let you browse my ListChallenge or Goodreads if you’d like to see all of them. If you have any questions let me know!

Total Books Read: approximately 170 (161 individual titles)

Average Rating: 4.2/5 stars

Shortest Book: Bigfoot Pirates Haunt My Balls (17 pages)

Longest Book: The Hands of the Emperor (901 pages)

Favorite Books of 2021

(Top 5) The Goblin Emperor/The Witness for the Dead by Katherine Addison The Hands of the Emperor by Victoria Goddard Greenwing & Dart series by Victoria Goddard The Murderbot Diaries by Martha Wells Unnatural Magic by C.M. Waggoner   Record of a Spaceborn Few (Wayfarers #3) by Becky Chambers Hunger Pangs: True Love Bites by Joy Demorra Hench by Natalie Zina Walschots Six Wakes by Mur Lafferty Chilling Effect by Valerie Valdes When the Tiger Came Down the Mountain by Nghi Vo   Honorable Mention Mexican Gothic by Silvia Moreno Garcia The Queen’s Thief series by Megan Whalen Turner Rivers of London series by Ben Aaronovitch (read by Kobna Holdbrook-Smith, my beloved)

I read so many good books this year that it has been literally painful trying to decide which ones to put on this post! (which is why it’s almost 3 weeks late, lol)

So what *did* make it onto this list? Books that managed some combination of “it’s really heckin good,” “it made me happy,” and “it did something memorable to impress me so it now lives rent-free in my head regardless of its other qualities.” 

But looking at my top 5 - they’re all on a level of their own, and I am very definitely sensing a theme. It’s incredibly imaginative worldbuilding with stories that may sometimes be a little light on plot but are driven by incredibly lovable characters who are a bit of an outsider, but they’re figuring out who they are and finding their place and their people who will love and support them. It’s beautiful and exactly what I need right now, and I am 100% down to sing their praises any time you want me to. 

But what about what’s *not* on the list? If I’m being honest, YA and I were just absolutely not vibing at all this year. It’s a little heartbreaking because YA has been the core of my reading identity for so many years, but I also think this is a long time coming. I am aging out of it, I think that’s definitely true, but I also feel like just the way YA SFF is being written nowadays is different than it used to be. I’ve been getting along a lot better with older backlist titles, so we’re not going to totally say goodbye, but, well, don’t be surprised if there’s less YA around the blog now. 

#bec talks #bec posts #2021 #2021 wrap up #books #the hands of the emperor #the goblin emperor #victoria goddard #chilling effect #hunger pangs #unnatural magic #book log

[jae-writes-fanfiction]

Requests for my 33 days of Halloween event are now open! The fics will be posted each day starting October 1st until November 2nd. After the event a Masterlist will be uploaded. The prompt list and easy requesting links are under the cut!

❤️ Memento Mori and Happy Haunting ❤️

Requests are open until October 3rd at 11pm EST. Cick here to request any mix of the prompts below, any additional dark content/holiday specific content is more than welcome- just make sure to include a character/fandom I write for!

Telling Scary Stories/Watching Scary Movies

Carving or painting Pumpkins

Corn/Hay Mazes/Apple picking

Trick-r-treating

Decorating for Halloween

Walking through Haunted Houses/Going to Haunts

Decorating Sugar Skulls/Preparing for Dia de los Muertos

Holding a Séance/using tarot cards

Vampires

Werewolves

Demons (also Incubus/Succubus)

Witches

Frankenstein or his monster

The Mummy

The Headless Horseman (Dullahans)

The Fair Folk/Fae/Faeries

Cryptids (mothman/Bigfoot, etc.)

Aliens/UFO’s

The Holiday Special: This genre is family friendly and focus on the warm and cozy feeling associated with the holiday and bringing people together. It features found families, and wholesome couples.

The B-Movie: This genre embodies trashy fun! Like a frat/sorority party filled with drama, sex, booze, and a little Halloween or horror flavor. Blood, guts, missing limbs/heads, broken bones, and other over the top/cheesey effects feature in this genre.

Haunted House/Ghost Stories: There are many types of ghosts and hauntings, this genre has them all wrapped up in a nice little package house. This genre features ghosts that don’t know they’re dead, the people who can see them, and the spooky practice of covering mirrors.

Found Footage: A series of vignettes that tie together at the end. Can be scary or not scary- it’s just moments tied together by a person/thing.

Slashers: Sometimes people get stabby. Usually in a very creative way. Chainsaws, chase sequences, masked antagonists, and the occasional bout of people consumption in this genre.

Musical: Music is the foundation of this genre, if requested the fic will be based partially on a song, or include references to music. (You may request which song if you’d like.)

Final Girl (person): The lone survivor in a horror movie, or the last person standing after the apocalypse, the ultimate badass.

Memento Mori: Reminders of the dead, or things long gone (relationships/places), can include personal items such a locks of hair/jewelry typical of Victorian mourning or things like memories that also haunt people and force them to recognize their own mortality.

The Void is Calling: This threat to the characters’s is much closer than they think…it might even be coming from inside the house. It can feature a phone call or texts from an unknown number or letters with no postmark/stamps.

The Sin Factor: Doing certain things (having sex, drinking, etc.) makes you less likely to survive the story.

Killing Boys: The leading lady is out for revenge, queer Bonnie and Clyde style.

I See Dead People: One of the characters can see ghosts, and cannot escape them.

Already Dead: A character is not aware they’re a ghost and must reach out in order to pass on. Or, a character knows they’re a ghost and refuses to pass on.

Black Pearl: The characters knew the treasure was cursed, yet they tried to find it anyway. Was it worth? Could it ever have? (Bonus: can include actual pirates.)

Falling to Pieces: Something is already rotting away, it might be the house, it might be a relationship, it might be the skeletons in the closet, or worse something under the floorboards.

Science Fiction double feature: Science can be just as scary as the stories we tell. Maybe it’s an experiment gone wrong, someone alone on a space ship, or a dark corner of an autopsy room- our characters must learn that just because they can doesn’t mean the should and sometimes dead is better.

Funky Physics: Whether it’s never ending hallways, looping rooms, doors to no-where, or a slightly wrong alternate dimension- our characters must try to navigate a changing landscape that they can’t predict.

A Haunted House

The oldest Cemetery in town

A ghost town/ an abandoned building late at night

The Paris Catacombs

The middle of the woods

A particularly empty stretch of road after dark

A castle/manor in the middle of nowhere with minimal occupants

A masquerade ball/costume party

An alley between surprisingly deserted city streets.

Salem Massachusetts

#im at work currently so my queue is still posting i will pin this and reblog it for time zones #if this flops were all gonna pretend it didnt happen #freakyfics #halloween fanfiction event #requests open

[diabolik-losers]

diaboys as chuck tingle book titles

Shu: Pounded In The Butt By The Crushing Existential Weight of Sentient Self-Awareness

Reiji: Oppressed In The Butt By My Inclusive Holiday Coffee Cups

Ayato: Slammed By My Handsome Fidget Spinner

Kanato: Slammed In The Butt By The Living Leftover Chocolate Chip Cookies From My Kitchen Cabinet

Laito: Bisexually Sandwiched By My Sentient Peanut Butter Husband And Our New Living Jelly Girlfriend

Subaru: My Butt Is Comforted By The Realisation That I'm Okay And Everything Will Be Alright

Ruki: England's Ass Is Haunted By A Hung Parliament

Yuma: Bigfoot Pirates Haunt My Balls

Kou: Pounded In The Butt By The Handsome Sentient Manifestation Of My Twitch Stream

Azusa: Pounded In The Butt By My Own Butt

#these are real btw #might do the other boys later #diabolik lovers #sakamaki shu #sakamaki reiji #sakamaki ayato #sakamaki laito #sakamaki kanato #sakamaki subaru #mukami azusa #mukami kou #mukami yuma #mukami ruki

[maliciousindungeon]

fuck harry potter and fuck jk rowling, lets talk about a book with actual lgbt representation: bigfoot pirates haunt my balls by chuck tingle. a beautiful love story about a crew of closeted gay bigfoot pirate ghosts pounding the fuck out of a twink until they can move on to the afterlife.

#my post #listen to pounded in the butt by my own podcast theres a reading of it there

[meadowmines]

Chuck Tingle is a Goddamn National Treasure

Pounded in the Butt by My Own Podcast E3: Bigfoot Pirates Haunt My Balls

*deep inhale*

So this morni--

*incapacitating laughter*

gay bigfoot pirate ghost crew never got to be gay in life so they haunt a dude’s balls and there’s a ghost ship and lot of ghost bigfoot pirate sex also humans fucked up bigfeets’ natural habitat which is why bigfeet turned to piracy in the first place and also there’s commentary about human privilege and jesus christ I love listening to this at the gym but I dread the day someone sees me falling out and asks me what I’m listening to because then I’ll either have to lie unconvincingly or have to tell them I’m listening to dramatic readings of gay bigfoot ghost erotica 

#podcasts #god bless chuck tingle

[ecctogasm]

I'm fucking crying, my boyfriend had never heard of chuck tingle so I sent him a bunch of the cover images and he was like, "that's amazing" then I was like "yeah I heard an excerpt of bigfoot pirates haunt my balls and it changed my life" and he was like "....wait...THESE ARE REAL BOOKS?!?!???"

#chuck tingle

[aprillikesthings]

if you’re having a bad day, please read Chuck Tingle’s bibliography

It’s really hard to pick a fave:

Reamed by My Reaction to the Title of This Book

Bigfoot Pirates Haunt My Balls

Pounded in the Butt by My Book "Pounded in the Butt by My Book 'Pounded in the Butt by My Book "Pounded in the Butt by My Book 'Pounded in the Butt by My Own Butt'"'"

Unicorn Butt Cops: Beach Patrol

Lonely Author Pounded by Dinosaur Social Media Followers

Pokebutt Go: Pounded by 'Em All

Turned Gay by the Existential Dread That I May Actually Be a Character in a Chuck Tingle Book

#chuck tingle

[drchucktingle]

tingle origin story

#love is real #tingleverse #bigfoot pirates haunt my balls #chuck tingle

[power-handmaiden]

Day 93: Open Wide For The Handsome Sabertooth Dentist Who Is Also A Ghost

The beginning of this one made me think of "Bigfoot Pirates Haunt My Balls"; the protagonist has a mysterious ailment that manifests as pain and a ghost encounter implied by the title. That is where the similarity ends. The fact that the dentist is a ghost is not addressed in the story until the end, in what would be a twist ending if it weren't in the title.

I'm not sure what to think of this one, honestly. The Bigfoot Pirates had a clear reason for their haunting, following a more traditional ghost story of spirits needing to resolve something they weren't able to address in their time on Earth. What is the aim of the sabertooth dentist, though? Why did his office manifest just to address the protagonist's dental/anal needs? Was it an altruistic act from the afterlife, or did he just want to give a pounding from beyond?

Maybe it says more about me that I'm questioning why the ghost of a dentist would continue working after death when it seems that in life he had a fulfilling career, but accepting without question that we're in a world where prehistoric cats can practice medical careers.

#2024 tingles my butt #chuck tingle

[crow-caller]

CURRENT MOOD:

THE MANY GOOD FACTS THAT LEAD INTO THE THEORY THAT CHUCK TINGLE IS ACTUALLY ANDREW HUSSIE

I’m going to paste the full text from the link above because I am wild for how ludicrous the homestuck fandom has become. And also. the weirdness of this theory.

If you haven't heard of him, Chuck Tingle is the author of popular ebooks such as "Pounded In The Butt By My Own Butt" and "Bigfoot Pirates Haunt My Balls". Now typically, this is the kinda weirdo I'd dismiss as simply that: some weird guy who found his niche and is running with it for fame, like Ray Sipe or Tommy Wiseau, but after a recent AMA, I got to thinking. And other redditors did too.

My theory: Andrew Hussie, and possibly Cohen Edenfield as his co-writer, is the real Chuck Tingle. Let's lay down the timeline:

2013-2014: Andrew Hussie puts the comic on Gigapause. He claims to do a massive amount of writing, but often contradicts that by claiming he had not gotten to work on Homestuck as much as he would have liked.

December 2014: Chuck Tingle appears, releasing a number of books in quick rapid succession. Homestuck begins the infamous Retcon arc, infamous for bad rushed writing and planning.

2015-2016: Homestuck barely tugs along, taking minor pauses and continuing to "degrade in quality" according to a majority of the fandom. Chuck Tingle releases books on an almost weekly basis, with such classics as "Pounded in the Butt by My Book "Pounded in the Butt by My Book 'Pounded in the Butt by My Book "Pounded in the Butt by My Own Butt"'"" (Not a typo, its begun to cascade on itself)

December 2015: Hiveswap is announced to be under new development, in 2D and later revealed to be written by Cohen.

April 2016: Homestuck ends. Chuck Tingle is nominated for a Hugo award as part of a weird political movement. Unwanting to be their pawn, he strikes back by having Zoe Quinn accept the award on his behalf..

October 2016: The previously hyped "Homestuck 2.0" is seemingly canceled, Dante Basco and John distance themselves from the comic and youtube channel. Cohen begins writing for Homestuck, starting with the Credits and Halloween snaps. The Chuck Tingle video game kickstarter is started by Zoe Quinn

November 2016: A previous video shows that the game includes involvement of Cohen and John of Homestuck 2.0. A new video announces the main villain will be played by Dante Basco.

January 2017: Chuck Tingle does an AMA, Hiveswaps release is imminent.

Now that the history lesson is over, let's just quickly state some further evidence:

Both Tingle and Hussie's earliest works start on the topic of Dinosaurs and Bigfoot, the latter being a connection to Barty Anderson a confirmed alternate internet persona of Andrew and his brother.

The recent AMA is a rare instance of Tingle posting without claiming it was edited by his son "Jon". Unlike his books and website posts that are written in plain english, his AMA is unfiltered, showing a very specific typing style that certainly matches his voice. He speaks in run-on sentences with sometimes meandering topics, and capitilizes IMPORTANT WORDS. He enjoys the BIG GAME (like Andrew) and talks of alternate timelines and The Void.

The idea of a pseudonym obsessed with muscled men and weird porn is right up Andrew's alley (no euphemism intended). The idea harks back to his Fine Art Reviews (NSFW EXTREME) and Tingle's characterization is not to far off from shards of Lord English, particularly Equius, but also Caliborn. We may see the inspiration for Tingle within Homestuck itself, drawing from the Troll Romance Book and sbahj.

The Chuck Tingle game has involvement of a majority of Hussie's team members, only shortly after the possible cancellation of Hussie's own projects. With no major falling-out or public information, is it possible they simply switched gears to Hussie's other project? One that gets much more attention on news outlets than Homestuck ever did?

So, do you think this could be it? Could Chuck Tingle's books be the ghost writing project we all assume Hussie has been contributing too? A fake online persona fixated on muscled men and bigfoot and political satire? It's certainly his type of ordeal.

I leave you with an excerpt from the end of Gigapause newspost, only weeks before Chuck Tingle would make his internet debut:

We'll enjoy more than our share of blistering pandemonium when all is said and done. We are slowly building to a particular moment I foresee on the horizon. It's not just characterized by the end of the story, though that should be a factor. It's more than that. Things I have planned, and some other things we'll say may be fortuitously aligned. Invisible pieces of a heinous machine all snapping together, mechanically congealing with a grim sense of purpose. I'm tentatively branding to this moment as The Rapture, and it will be more than you can bear. More than anyone can. And everyone won't.

#homestuck #andrew hussie #chuck tingle #the HECK #hussie #please spread this

[lcthulou]

In Praise of Chuck Tingle

Recently in Workshop we were talking about making quick cash with our writing. As these things do, we turned to erotica, and I asked a colleague, “Well, You follow Chuck Tingle, don’t you?”

Chuck, for the uninitiated, is the popular author of such classic gay erotic parodies as “Space Raptor Butt Invasion”, “Bigfoot Pirates Haunt my Balls”, and “Angry Man pounded in the Butt by the Fear of his…

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[transenbyhollis]

the sentence “bigfoot pirates haunt my balls” is a fucking trip. with each word it just gets more and more wild

#pounded in the butt by my own podcast #chuck tingle #bigfoot pirates haunt my balls