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whatudowhennooneseesyou · 9 months

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hello! If you don't mind explaining, what placements could be indicative of liking a certain type of music genre? i really like listening to rock/heavy metal/metalcore etc. and none of my family or friends seem to understand why lmao. my family even more so cause none of them listen to "heavier" music and im curious to know where this particular love of mine comes from considering ive never been exposed to this type of music at all and only discovered it by accident and it immediately felt like coming home. like this is where im meant to be and what im meant to be enjoying!

i feel like my scorpio moon might have something to do with it but also im an astro noob and im just mostly going off of stereotypes.

also idk if its relevant but my sag pluto is in conjunction with my scorpio moon (in the 10th house)?? iis it relevant? just an honest clueless question because pluto also deals with dark/heavy things doesn't it? and its one of scorpios ruling planets?

anyway, yeah! id just like to know what planets or signs could influence one's taste in music.

and totally unrelated but i feel like that scorpio moon also explains why some of the people im closest too all coincidentally have scorpio suns (and also why all the celebrities im drawn too have scorpio suns or risings 😭) even though various websites keep saying im incompatible with scorpios because of my sun sign. its not like i actively seek them out but nowadays it doesn't even surprise me when i like a celebrity and find out they're a scorpio. i just go like "ah, yes. that makes sense"

what do you think??

Hey!

This is one of my favourite astro questions I have received and I'm also a fan of 'heavier' music.

The alt/emo to kpop pipeline is real and amazing to be apart off.

Placements that can influence one's taste in music:

The most significant placement I would say is your MOON SIGN because whoever artist's moon sign matches your moon sign, you're going to feel their lyrics on a DEEP level.

So, I'm a Capricorn Moon and who is one of my fave artists?

Mitski.

Who also has a Capricorn Moon and a Scorpio Venus and I have CRIED...CRIED listening to her songs, they just send me in a deep state of melancholy and I love it.

3rd and 5th House placements because the 3rd House represents communication and 5th House represents hobbies and interests, including music.

Capricorn/10th House also have a love of nostalgia and all things vintage so I'm going to assume you like listening to some music that were popular before you were born?

If your Pluto is in Sagittarius, I feel like you and me are of a similar age because my Pluto is in Sagittarius and Pluto signs only change every couple of years.

So, if that is true.

I am safely going to assume that you're an emo/alt kpop stan like me and if so, Hi how are you?

I'm so happy we found each other!

We're always going to be naturally attracted to people who's Sun/Rising Signs are kind of compatible with our moon and venus sign.

So it makes sense that you're going to feel comfortable around Scorpio Sun and Risings because the personality and identity they project just naturally suits what emotionally nurture and stimulates you.

Moon Sign compatibility is always more important and significant than Sun Sign compatibility because emotional compatibility is what helps achieves long-lasting and happy connections.

Hope that helps,

Yours Sincerely,

Fellow alt/emo kpop stan

And btw...

My rising sign is in Scorpio

#ahh so there you go the theory works because you found me on here!!#I am your own confirmation bias #whatudowhennooneseesyou anon asks #whatudowhennooneseesyou answered asks #astrology talk with ruby #kpop astrology

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duskdragonxiii · 3 years

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dusky in what ways do you think therapy would help q4?

I'll be honest i dont know the exact benefits of therapy ive only had counselling a couple of times bc it was free and i was on the brink but i do have so many many thoughts DJSKLBF

Every character in vanguard has thier own issues and while some of them are nuanced some of them are really really obvious

Aichi is very clearly depressed it's not even subtle and as someone who's been through situations that make Aichi's story relatable I think therapy is something he really needs but I've stressed before that Aichi even goes through relapses and such. Vanguard is what's helping him through it its the closest he's getting to therapy. Maybe it's from being bullied in school but Aichi has serious self esteem issues and the core of Vanguard is imagining yourself as the best version of yourself- It's really not a subtle message. Kai brought him into the world of Vanguard and it completely changed his life. Slowly but surely. Even his family note how happy he becomes after getting into vanguard and meeting Kai again. The development on aichis part is really slow but in fairness depression is just like that.

Misaki canonically has PTSD after the death of her parents (this was more severe in V series but at the same time it felt really brushed over which is a real shame) and similar to Aichi was depressed and had little interest in anything before being dragged kicking and screaming into a game she was so scared of. Once again Vanguard is the key to getting through- not over- her issues and she's far happier with her life now.

Kamui is easy to overlook bc he's younger and isn't as clearly distressed as the rest of the team but I think he has serious social issues. He's a popular kid among his peers and he thrives on enthusiasm but he's also vulnerable in his own way. He's intimidated by change and finds it hard to understand other people I think. He has a hard time feeling he belongs with people. One of those people who has so many friends but rarely lets any of them close. He found where he belongs in Q4 and thats why when he finds Kai hard to deal with he finds is especially hard. It's really hard to say what Kamui's issues are tbh but I don't doubt therapy would benefit him too. (I hc he has adhd and dyslexia but that's more of a me thing) Kai in particular has serious issues with running and hiding from his problems. He acts all cool in order to push people away. Obviously he's already fucked up from his parents death and the first person who got him to open up after that was of course Ren (and Tetsu) unfortunately as a result he didn't realize how high a pedestal he was putting Ren on that it absolutely shattered him when Ren turned out to not be the person he had been in his imagination (Don't give me any of that he changed bc of psyqualia thing, that's a metaphor and you know it and you're missing the whole point) and instead of trying to accept Ren as he was he ran away. This is addressed again in the Psyqualia Aichi arc when Aichi starts to get lost in his own power- giving Kai the painful reminder when once again someone he's connecting to might not be the flawless and innocent person he imagined them to be. The difference is, Aichi brought him close to a whole lot of other people and Aichi himself made him realize that he can't keep running and that's what brings him to his senses and able to face it.

Not Q4 but relevant; Ren has abandonment issues probably due to his shitty parents (although this is only really established in V series where things are quite different but i still think that's the case in the og) so when Kai didn't approve of his new self and worst of all walked away without even saying goodbye it sent him over the edge and he became the nasty and aggressive cardfighter we know him as in season 1- all because he wants Kai to come back to him. He has a single minded OBSESSION with Kai that's really not healthy- and while after season 1 he starts to get better he never truely lets go.

Kai and Ren could BOTH get over their issues if they would just talk about it but unfortunately they both have issues with communication that make it impossible- hence why cardfight is so important to them now. with thier imagination and putting thier true selves in this game it gives them something in common and a way to communicate through all the issues they have with eachother and at the end of LM though it's been really slow its clear that they ARE healing. It may sound silly, but Kai making an off comment about how he doesn't like the way Ren is dressed is a BIG thing for him. I could analyse this moment till the cows come home because its the first time Kai manages to express himself with words, clumsy as it is. What "I don't like the old you" really means below the surface is I know and accept that you have changed. And Ren's playful response being "Then you like me as i am now?" while he is being playful that in itself means I'm still not the person you want me to be I will never be that again but I'm happy that you can finally see me as I am. It's really important to me....

Anyway Sorry for this ramble i really feel strongly about cfv LOL welcome to my KaiRen agenda--

#answer time #THIS IS SO LONG IM SO SORRY #i have to rewatch cfv bc honestly i dont remember much abt kamui and im so sad bc i love him

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icharchivist · 3 years

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cries think I made my ask too long so like half of it got deleted bc I typed it right into the askbox. anyways. I come bearing a3 thoughts! at first i was gonna watch the spring/summer and autumn/winter ones and then give my thoughts on both but. turns out i had too many thoughts lol? which i shouldve expected but i actually kind of... got bored by the first two chapters of this event! so i skipped and went to the stranger. and then went back. (1/?)

and then i got to like "tsuzuru and kazunari are having a fight?" and jumped on that like a starving wolf bc helllll yeah! i rly adored kazunari in sardine search, i think he was great! hes just so nice and has good vibes. he and taichi are kind of similar i feel? but i think their respective ages contribute to a lot of difference in their characters. why does it feel like this askbox limit personally wants me dead. (2/?)

anyways! i rly enjoyed the improv scene devolving to a real fight. admittedly i was kinda surprised that the content of that improv wasnt rly too similar to their actual fight? like normally a3 has the story of the play run parallel to like the actual real character drama so i thought the improv might function as the play in this event... it was still good tho. the scene i mean. (3/?)

also i rly liked tenma ragging on them afterwards. like he was mean but. first i adore tenma. second he just felt like. a different meddling type to muku lol? like the vibes he gave me were always like... im going to be a considerate leader and watch out for the ppl under me! therefore im gonna make sure theyre doing fine! aggressively. i think tenmas also just like a friendly person who likes to take care of others in general? like im not saying hes omi or anything but just like. (4/?)

that time he offers his car ride to juza so they can go to school together like hes surprisingly open compared to his initial prickliness. also ive got thoughts abt the tenma juza SSR conversation thing i read. one day ill make a tenma and juza fic and complete a trifecta haha... but thats something for another day! back to the actual story. the way tsuzuru dives right in after kazunari! that was so nice. like its easy to see how much they care abt each other. (5/?)

to the point where like even while theyre fighting theyre like angry but still like fairly quiet bc i think theyre both at least trying to be considerate of each other. ah the moment kazunari didnt respond to tsuzuru trying to talk to him i KNEW he was sick tho. felt proud of myself for calling that one but also the reason i knew is bc i have used the "character being sick during an argument causing them both to make up with each other" trope myself before so uh. like recognizes like haha. (6/?)

anyways the cg there was fuckin beautiful like kazunari looks so sad in the middle bit but then u see his shy smile? like hes sick but hes also like. happy to be there. idk. lovely. i adore kazu i think hes just deeply sweet to other people. tsuzuru telling him "you make everyone around you feel as bright and cheery as the things you design” is so wonderful too (7/?)

now im thinking. ah tsuzuru probably feels quite drained after a script and such (i know i am when i finish any piece--its like the emotions just rush out of me) so i like to think that like yknow. kazunari dropping by his room or whatever helps him set himself back to normal! but also when tsuzurus like oh u left ur magazines here! i suddenly remembered. wait shit kazunari and tsuzuru arent even roommates. wonder how much they bother masumi lmaooo. anyways overall very good story! (8/?)

some more thoughts: itaru and citron were so cute in this event! just like. citron saying itaru winking makes his heart skip a beat and itaru quoting citrons wrong sayings (which. i am also guilty of today i told my brother "we'll jump that bridge when we cross it" so) also i love how yuki is like "thank god i wasnt partnered with that hack" but like. yuki. u could literally just not talk about him. like its so funny to me yuki is like wow i hate tenma but he wont shut up abt him haha (9/?)

i also was a lil taken aback at hearing itaru go "for the lulz" tbh... like it fits him. but im mad it fits him? anywaysss thats all i had for this one! im gonna watch autumn/winter and go say my thoughts on that soon. sorry the ask was so broken up, idk what happened!

OLA FRIEND! Glad to see your thoughts again omg :3c

tho omg the fact tumblr deleted it all + the ask limit was all so evil D: poor friend.

I'm putting my answer under a read more because. Well. *waves hand* it got long.

The non-play events can be perhaps a little harder to get into because unlike the plays events that you start with a clear idea of at least the main plot (re: "they are preparing a play, i know the leads so i know who it will focus on"), non-plays events take a little longer to first set up what event they're participating in, how to prepare for it, and then bring up the conflict and which characters are going to have something to do with said conflict. So i can understand that they're a little harder to get into when we know the plays awaits.

On top of that, the first few events still were a bit tame because since it was early when the app released, i think they didn't go too heavy at once in case some people were still stuck on earlier chapters (esp since especially Winter is hard to unlock)

ANYWAY glad that it sucked you in on the second read :3c

So glad you were invested in that conflict!

Totally agreeing with you about Kazunari, and very good point about Taichi as well! they aren't the Puppy Pair for nothing :'D (Yuki took one look at both of them together and just Knew. His suffering knows no end (lovingly)). But yeah i think they have a lot in common, they both are the really bright and friendly figure, both also started in overcompensating a bit because both wanted to be popular in some ways.

But we do have, on one hand, Kazunari who wanted that rather late in his life while Taichi always thrived for that, the fact Kazunari made friends easily and it's just that he was scared of getting to the next level, while Taichi always struggled with this quest for popularity. In a way too both of them were at least scared to share a part of them, Kazunari worrying to show his thoughts, and Taichi being a spy and all of that... which impacts them really differently considering the guilt it puts on Taichi. And then you add their age into the mix, especially the fact Kazu is the oldest of his troupe and Taichi the youngest of his, it makes them fairly similar all while being fairly different.

both are so interesting to me and i love them bothhh, so it's always nice to see them have focus.

admittedly i was kinda surprised that the content of that improv wasnt rly too similar to their actual fight? like normally a3 has the story of the play run parallel to like the actual real character drama so i thought the improv might function as the play in this event

i love how you are seeing the patterns a3 tends to do it's so neat!

It's true the fight isn't really similar to their actual fight, though i do love that they had "swapped" their personality for the act and ended up insulting each other for theirr swapped personality. Like, Kazunari insulted part of himself in Tsuzuru's character and Tsuzuru did the same?? and then the fight escalated and the way Kazunari broke character hurts bc it's really that Tsuzuru hit where it hurts. But yeah it still wasn't too relevent to their actual fight, though i think the thing is that their fight was as such mostly because they tend to clash often due to their personalities rather than just this singular reason why, so to have the play go more "it's their personalities the problem" kinda hurt lol. But yeah still agreed that it didn't reflect much on the plot itself

I was rereading the improv bit to answer correctly and man since we're going to talk about Tenma next, i just. Love that when Kazunari, breaking character, his eyes sad, tells Tsuzuru "you have no rights talking to me like that..." it then cuts on Tenma being upset. Bc like. Exactly like you say, he wants to look out for the people under him. and like. Kazunari is his friend. A friend he also snapped at once and insulted for being who he was, so he probably could have relived a bit of his fight with Kazunari seeing those two fights; Except that now Kazunari is one of his closest friend and he doesn't like that.

Also like. It was also because he could still hide under the plot of the improv but it's so rare, and it never happened before that point, that Kazunari stands for himself in a "the way you treat me is unfair"? Like again re: his fight with Tenma, when Tenma snapped at him, while Tenma was unfair with him, Kazunari took the blame, called himself annoying and all yaknow?

The fact Kazunari is starting to accept that he can take more place for himself is something the whole Summer Troupe have been trying to help him work on, but especially Tenma. Tenma is always there trying to push Kazunari to say what he means, to express his feelings, to stop hiding.

And for once, Kazunari does that in front of everyone... and it's because he's breaking because of his fight with Tsuzuru.

I think Tenma probably felt it was even more of a reason to get involved like, this is the thing he's been working on with Kazunari about, and now he's being all hurt about it, not on Tenma's watch!

And i totally agree with your take on Tenma! (and would LOVE to read the Tenma and Juza fic once you get to it :3c). I think, Tenma is really caring and is trying to take a place as a caretaker and all, but unlike Omi, he has absolutely no reference for it.

Omi is the eldest of multiple brothers and everything indicates his parents have always been lovely to him. Add to it how he ended up leader of a delinquent crew he was clearly looking after, Omi has a history of taking care of people, of nurturing them, and he knows what he's doing. Meanwhile Tenma grew up on TV sets, mostly surrounded by adults and not by people his age, mostly getting advice from being ordered around by directors i think. And his parents are distant, hyperfocused on their job, not really nursing with him. So Tenma meanwhile really didn't have a family emotional support and was in situation where he couldn't befriend other kids his age. His only reference was probably Igawa (his agent) and i think for a long time he didn't exactly see it, and Igawa remained mostly professional so there was probably the idea of it not being sincere? That Tenma had to grow out of.

So like, they're both extremely nurturing and caring, but my point is that Omi has experiences in it and is at ease with it, while Tenma has been so alone and in places were he had no support system that even if he wants to support others, he still struggles with how to do it because he has no set exemple. And that's his development in the main story arc, to learn from how Izumi shows she cares in order to care back at them all.

Like i mean the way Tenma yelled at them about their mistakes at first feel like he would have picked it up from some directors on TV set yaknow? Probably hearing them say that with no consequences on others actors, seeing it worked, didn't think "that's an abuse of power and the actors probably all think badly of their director for that" but "wow that works", tried it on his troupesmates and realized this is... not how that works. And it's spending time watching how Izumi encourages them that have him fix his way to approach it.

So yeah i got lost too into it but like. I feel you on Tenma i love him so much and i love his development so to see him get pissed and involved there? was really nice. even if he was aggressive about it. He's still learning.

ANYWAY back to Tsuzuru and Kazunari, totally agree with what you say next. They still care a lot about each other and yeah they're at a point where this consideration they have for each other make their anger more quiet than trying to attack one another (Banri could NEVER-). so yeah totally agree with you!

DLKFJDLKF i LOVE the reasoning on "recognizing that Kazunari was sick". Your writer's powers making you see through... *coughs* unlike Tsuzuru....

AND YEAH ALL YOU SAY ABOUT THE CG.. YEAH. Kinda crying thinking about it again now LDKJFLKDJF It's just. Everything about it is so soft and tender. The things Tsuzuru tells Kazunari are soo so sweet sobs. They're just adorable i love those kids. and also i feel you for Kazu he's just that great huh?

The whole set up about Kazu dropping by his room is so so cute! I love it! Like probably the very first time Tsuzuru braces himself because "oh no i'm not in the mood to stand mister hyperenergy himself" but Kazunari quickly adjust his energy so that Tsuzuru can just recharge without being overwhelmed. Yes it would drive Masumi completely nuts. Which i think is a plus for Tsuzuru like, hey, if Masumi gets annoyed once in a while it's a win. But yeah also i think that Tsuzuru and Kazunari should really have the Artistic Soldiarity of Students in Art school Probably Working Until Very Late To Complete Their Projects. Would love if at the end Tsuzuru gave it back yaknow?

but yeah their story was really nice i'm so glad you liked it! :D

oh god yeah Itaru and Citron were SO cute in it too, i also love the comments Citron makes about Itaru's winks. Just there flirting in front of everyone like those two embarrassing friends huh. (probably with Muku being all starry eyes considering he greatly admires both Itaru and Citron and, well, Romance.). And yeah i love how Itaru ends up so much into Citron's rhythm (and this idiom you said? is glorious actually, 10 points for you)

DLKFJDLKF what a call out toward Yuki. "yes i hate Tenma,no i won't shut up about him, also if YOU say you hate Tenma i'm going to stab you with my needles, have a nice fucking day.". I love their dynamics so much aha

And yeah Itaru is there cursing us the whole time with the fact he's the greatest nerd ever and it fits him perfectly. It makes me laugh so hard.

Thank you so much for having shared your thoughts there! it's always a blast to read through them and i dearly enjoyed it! (+ it makes me relive the event a little and it makes me soft!)

I'm so glad you enjoyed it! So glad you had so many thoughts about all of this, what a blast.

thank you for sharing, and looking forward the Autumn/Winter reactions :3c

Take care!

#ichareply #ichafantalks a3 #sonnets of beauty

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summoner-kentauris · 3 years

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What does your interpretation of Zacharias think about Líf and Thrasir? (You can either just answer or write a lil story if you feel like it)

OOOO now i have thought in my free time a fair amount about what líf thinks of zasha but, and i cannot believe this, i have not thought about what zacharias thinks about líf and thrasir. full disclosure, book III happened to be going on when i formally stopped playing feh. i kept up with the story after that but, theres my obligatory knowledge base disclaimer.

also minor cws through this whole thing because i talk here and there about zacharias and his... mm, canonical relationship to death/selfharm

so, i spent a lot of time thinking about this one, and i keep coming back to my gut reaction, which is that i don't think zacharias would like them very much. i dont know why i think that, though.

PART ONE

i think a lot of it would depend on how they approach him, which is maybe why i've spent more time thinking about the reverse of this ask, come to think of it. see, i think zacharias could go any which way in terms of what he thinks of them. i think he could hate them, as two people who killed versions of everyone he ever loved, including metaphorically killing off the two people closest to him.

i think he could love him, having seen the hell (ha ha literally) that they went through. understanding what that feels like. given the way he talks about his suicide attempts, and honestly that he spent most of book I trying to get people to kill him, really his whole relationship to death. i mean the man talks a lot about death and killing. he might not be the feh OC who best understands how manipulative and... whats a good word. alluring? what im trying to say is that besides eir, he might be the one most likely to understand why Hel and hel's offer appealed to líf and thrasir. i feel like this bit has a place here: "With his dying breath...he begged for his life. He called out your names! "I'll do anything you ask! Just let me live!" excepting of course that i still am not sure if i think he said/thought that or not. ive never been sure who really is in control of speaking right then and there. Anyway. Probably he could come to understand Líf and Thrasir's stance, enough that he could care about them the same ways he cares about his versions of Alfonse ann Veronica

on the other hand, i can see him being fully horrified by the choices those two made in response. this bit: Not anyone... This dark god...seeks death. And it cries for the destruction of Askr. Like. Líf and Thrasir are intentionally enacting the same thing as the dark god's desires, in order to correct a mistake they made that, uh, also enacted the same thing as dark god's desires. talk about awkward. and i think Zasha, who has lived with this nightmare in his head for so long, might recoil from people who are so directly aligned with it. who wants to be around someone who has become, who has chosen to become, everything you ever feared you'd be? especially when you're nearly drowning from the effort of fighting to stop yourself.

i could also see him meeting them and it being incredibly, incredibly bad for him. i feel like, he puts a whole lot of... mm. what am i trying to say.here:

Yet it is you that says this, dear friend, and so I must consider it. I see the faith reflected in your eyes. Perhaps it is possible...

SPEAKING OF BUNNY ZACHARIAS I ALSO THINK YOU COULD TAKE THE FOLLOWING:

You never change. All you see is a lofty goal, even if you lack the means to achieve it... The idea that gods would fall by the hand of man is a fantasy... and a preposterous one. This is a goal that even our ancestors Líf and Thrasir could not achieve.

setting aside the obligatory wtf zash i know you know your lore (fuck, maybe there is no killing the gods, maybe all Fire Emblem victories are temporary at best and Zenith is the only one who knows it. but i think, probably not), i think you could spin a very believable scenario where zacharias takes one look at these two ambitious, arrogant posers and absolutely refuses to speak to them any further.

so, part one, i think that zacharias could think any number of things about líf and thrasir. which i suppose means that i think he's fairly neutral on the subject of líf and thrasir. makes sense to me, i suppose. i feel like zacharias | bruno has practice (regardless of whether he's any good at it or not, or whether its any good for him) at holding and maintaining separate personas, so I don't think the fact that líf and thrasir were alfonse and veronica would necessarily be all that important to him.

which brings me to part ii

what happened to dead zenith zacharias

if zacharias is neutral on the subject, I think a lot of their relationship is going to pushed in one direction or another by líf and thrasir themselves.

and, complicating matters (when do I make things simple?), i think their approach to zacharias would of course depend on what happened to their zacharias. correct me if im wrong, but i dont think we have even a hint what happened to him.

there are three ish options I'm seeing. one: as dead world zenith is further along in its timeline and as zacharias claims he's almost out of time with his curse, other zacharias died due to that before the war with hel. i feel like scenario one is the most likely to lead to a good relationship between main zacharias and líf and thrasir.

two: mr. professional "knows plot relevant things out of knowhere" was the one who found out about angrboða's heart in the first place. especially given "As destruction took hold, we joined with Embla to seek the forbidden heart...", which to me sounds a lot like, "hel was kicking our ass then zacharias showed up and said we should go get this mystical plot object from embla". thrasir even says she and líf weren't allies before the world went to shit. anyway. hear me out here:

Yes. The heart is sealed within an Emblian blood temple. If that seal is broken, someone will die each time the heart beats... Those who perform the rite are the first to die.

Now. Líf claims he was the one who broke it open, but he also was present for the war that followed and only after was he killed and inducted into hel's army. so. both of those things can't be true. i propose that the magic mcguffin located in a sealed emblian blood temple was unlocked by our dear zacharias and thats what killed him in other zenith. i think its possible that other veronica was the one who did it, but you know. its all imagination at this point. also, and i forgot this, but thrasir does go off about how she can't lose until she saves her brother, so. something especially tragic happened at least. and oh boy is scenario two a nice fresh tasty tragedy. so that's scenario two. other zacharias directly died as a result of attempts to fight hel

number three thing that could have happened to zach is boring. he's always off doing things, he could have just died off screen. i mean. everyone did, eventually.

frankly he could still be alive for all i know. the heart appears to take the lives of people in the world, not of the world, or else the summoner would have been fine. so, if zacharias was on one of his off world jaunts, he could conceivably be a-okay. well. as okay as someone who's whole world died. i don't think that's what happened, because thrasir is pretty clear about feeling that she failed him, but yknow.

líf and thrasir's reactions to the above

thrasir is i think the most straightforward. i can't really see her approaching main zacharias with anything but positive intent. even if she's only a little bit open, i think thrasir and zacharias will probably have a decently tolerable relationship. if zacharias can come back to a country that exiled him as a kid and let his mother die in a dungeon and then go on to not just befriend but protect and care for a half sister he didnt know before then, then i think he'll find a way to care about thrasir. you know, intsys could have had fun making another perpetual older brother character. as i understand it, xander gets brother'd a lot, he and zach could have talked. could have been fun. a whole, zacharias, a historically traumatized child: *arrives in a world* every currently traumatized kid in a five mile radius: oh shit this one's ours now. you know what im saying? found family except zacharias would very much like it to stop finding him. he's got important brooding to do. but anway, they didn't go that route and its a tragedy.

líf is... more complicated. i think scenario one creates the most positive outlook. i can see him still having guilt over zacharias' loss, but i think any of it would be overshadowed by everything else that happened. in this scenario, líf finally gets back a piece of the world he'd lost. yeah, it's not his zacharias, but still. it is a zacharias, who is living and breathing and frowning and asking why you are staring at me, knight. i think the two of them could get along rather well, although i see them having significant issues with pessimism. inch-restingly enough... the dark curse bades its hosts to kill askrans. and líf is, well. dead. so... perhaps... perhaps líf wouldn't trigger the curse like alfonse does. in that case, not only does líf get someone back he thought he'd never see again, but so does zacharias.

scenario two is just a nightmare. frankly, i initially thought this scenario would lead to líf just ignoring zacharias (out of guilt, pain, etc), but i was rereading the scripts looking for the spelling of angrboða and this came up:

Tell Hel. She'll erase those memories. She'll erase them all...

so, honestly? i think that in scenario two líf just straight up gets hel to remove his memories of zacharias (as an aside maybe this is also why he never ever ever talks about other anna >:{ )

in that case, líf wouldn't really have any reason to talk to this man, who causes this empty deeply sad feeling to well up in him for now discernible reason. and zacharias has no reason (or time) to talk to this standoffish general of the dead. so. that's a real ships in the night moment.

number three i think líf would still hold the same guilt as in number two, but i don't think it would be as horrifically tragic, so i think it's more likely he'd be willing to approach zacharias. he does appear to have even worse of a thing than alfonse about not opening oneself up to people, but i think that even if he's líf, he once was an alfonse, and being that this is me answering this, i don't think any alfonse can really keep away from a zacharias for very long. its a version of the person who once knew him as well as any other person in the world. like líf can't really seem to stop himself from associating with main sharena, i don't think he could stop himself from reaching out in his own way to main zacharias. and god does that man need some more friends. i think zacharias would probably be a little frightened of líf, and of what an alfonse could become. but i think probably... i feel like a lot of book i issues stem from the fact that, justified or not, zacharias thinks alfonse would risk anything, any harm to save him. i don't know that confronting an alfonse who literally risked everything and did all harm to save his world would be a comfort, but i do think zacharias would get a lot out of having someone who's already done the worst they can do. been there, done that, got the tshirt. i think zacharias would be a little afraid of what an alfonse could become, but i think he would no longer have to be afraid of... no, anxious about it. i think there's a kind of calm in having something confirmed that zacharias could appreciate. healthy? unhealthy? fuck if i know. i also think that in líf, zacharias has a friend who he can't physically hurt anymore. lífs already dead. been there done there got the.... glowing gel torso. i think, curse nonewithstanding, zacharias will always have some degree of tension and fear about hurting people he's in a relationship with, be that because of his issues with abandonment, of abandoning, of harm, etc. but you know. líf's kind of a rock. and he's already hit his rock bottom, now that i'm thinking about rocks. i think that kind of steady, placid deathness could really help zacharias. and i think he would find it soothing, whether or not he knew why.

plus he will be able to know that if the curse gets him, if he dies... he'll still have a friend in the realm of the dead. he doesnt have to be so afraid of leaving and getting left

so there we go! lots of musings. i have been thinkin about why my headcanons are less that and more elaborate branching theories, and i think it is because i would change my opinion depending on which story i wanted to tell or hear or see.so yeah. dunno which one of these answers belongs to the question, what does your interpretation of Zacharias think about Líf and Thrasir?, but hopefully at least one of them is interesting to read about!

OH also. i think he would be petty-ly annoyed about them cribing líf and thrasir's name. like full on scholar petty. probably showed up to the order in a nerdy huff excited to meet the actual factual líf and thrasir and turns out its just those two, sitting around glowing and reciting death metal lyrics like they're spoken word ballads. dont think he'd get over that ever.

#as an aside during the course of writing this #i have become convinced that ''I was powerless to stop it... There was nothing I could do...'' eir #could probably have interesting things to talk aboutwith ''he was all alone... there was nothing he could do to save himself...'' zacharias #anonymous #whew thats a lot of words #ill spell check in the morning #yeah right no ill spell check tomorrow evening #thats more likely #that was fun to think about #i hope this makes sense because i am NOT going to reread it #im going to go get dinner #sat here and DID NOT MOVE for ages #my neck is killing me #thanks zacharias

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tonystarktogo · 6 years

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Tiny Tony Overlord Part 5

Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Read on AO3

Betaed by the amazing @folklejend. All remaining mistakes are my own.

Summary: In which Bix isn't as indifferent as she'd like to be, a lot of people die put nobody really cares, a miraculous recovery doesn't actually solve all of Tony's problems and, as always, life isn't fair.

Yay, an update on time! :) Please enjoy!

.Still The Parking Lot of Zach’s B&B.

Bix doesn’t hate a lot of things. Disliking, sure. A ton of things even, Tony Stark currently being on top of that list. But hate? Hate requires effort, hate requires emotional investment, and Bix happens to be short on both.

What Bix definitely and without question hates, though, are the kid’s eyes.

Sure, rationally Bix knows the kid is Tony Stark. The ‘how’ and ‘why’ are two big, blank spots, but watching a forty-four-year-old man being turned into a kid that doesn’t look a day over nine is a pretty eye-opening experience. It also isn’t relevant to the mission. A dead Stark is a dead Stark after all, no matter at what age.

The problem is, he doesn’t look like a Stark. He looks like a child. A child with big brown eyes staring up at Bix and-

Fuck.

Why is it always brown eyes? Why can’t they be green or blue? And why does this stupid detail make Bix hesitate at all?

[continues under the cut]

Stark is still standing there, looking tiny in front of Bix and the other men. He is clutching a half-empty water bottle like it’s a teddy bear and that shouldn’t have any effect on Bix at all. Just because Stark makes for a damn cute kid and his stubborn pout may or may not raise all sorts of protective instincts Bix didn’t even know existed until now doesn’t have to mean anything.

Bix has been serving Hydra for years , has lied and betrayed and murdered for an organisation that doesn’t give a fuck about them. And Bix isn’t doing it because of some twisted conviction to save the world. All that drivel about humanity being unable to handle freedom and how the world has to be ruled to achieve its true potential is absolute bullshit. An excuse for a couple of power-hungry maniacs to justify their genocide, nothing more.

And right now Bix is supposed to murder another kid for their little chess game. A brown-eyed kid.

It is an over-eager underling who decides to take things into his own hands. Far too impatient, he won’t last long in the field.

Unfortunately, Bix doesn’t even get to punish the wayward minion, which is honest to god the best part of being team leader, because in that moment, mini-Stark activates the Asset. The one thing everyone had been so sure he wouldn’t be capable of, wouldn’t figure out how to do in time.

They should have accounted for Stark’s completely unrealistic luck in their plans, damn it.

Not that it matters anymore. The Soldier has been activated. Stark’s command doesn’t leave much wiggle room either. Twelve of SHIELD’s standard combatants against the Winter Soldier? Bix doesn’t need a fortune teller to know how this fight is going to end.

Bix doesn’t bother to share that revelation with the other agents. It would be a waste of time. Besides, it’s not like Hydra choses its recruits based on their well-developed sense of loyalty. Instead, Bix does the only sensible thing when faced with a brutal killing machine that has been turned loose: Bix jumps over Stark’s crumbled body and runs.

* * * * *

Waking up in a place you don’t remember falling asleep in is an incredibly disconcerting experience. Waking up in a pool of blood, on the other hand, is almost comforting in its familiarity.

Slowly, Tony lifts his head. The motion is less painful than anticipated, considering the amount of blood his body is covered in. Curling his toes and clenching his hands confirms that his extremities are in working order as well, and besides the persistent ache in his left upper arm and the cuts on his hands, he seems to be uninjured.

Tony should probably freak out about the blood on him—he looks like he’s come fresh off the set of a really bad horror flick—but frankly, he’s woken up in worse. Actually, he feels pretty good about himself right now. His pulsing headache has completely disappeared and though no more than thirty minutes could have passed, Tony feels well-rested and energised.

It’s true, he supposes; the mental state does influence one’s physical condition. Because for the first time since he’s woken up in that café, his mind is clear.

Hell, he’s been so gone, he hasn’t even realised how off he has been these past few hours. How foggy and sluggish his mind worked, how many holes there were in his memory that he had lacked the capacity to even notice. He had been running on barely-there instincts and nothing else. It was sheer dumb luck Dead-Eyes hadn’t killed him on the spot.

And then the confrontation in the parking lot. Tony hasn’t walked into an ambush like that in years. It is a good thing Vic had been unable to accompany him; she would have murdered him for his lack of caution.

In his defence, Tony had underestimated how fractured, for lack of a better word, the transfer would be. He had been warned, multiple times, about the dangers of messing with the time storage, but those warnings had always focused on the risks of knowing too much. The unpredictable ways the future would be changed by that knowledge alone. The very real possibility of being driven into insanity by a reality that would no longer be real.

In a way, Tony understands those concerns better now. After the constant pain of the last few hours, the sensation of being mentally ripped apart, of being overwhelmed by a life that is not quite his own, the terror of drowning in a future that can never be allowed to come to pass yet has, he gets how tempting an escape from the horror of it all can be.

At the same time though, there is this nagging voice in the back of his mind, the disbelieving “Is that really all you’ve got?“ he can’t fully silence. Because the truth is, compared to the last couple of years, this pain, this terror, is nothing.

Tony winces, instinctively shying away from the darkest of his new memories. The deaths, the hopelessness, the torture, the fight they continued because there was nothing else left to do anymore. The hollow victory when they had finally, finally discovered a cure—too late to make a difference, too late to save anyone. An endless line of faces, young and old. People they lost, people who sacrificed themselves, people who betrayed them in the end.

And now here he is. In 2014, where none of it has happened yet, back in a time where he can still make a difference, and yet Tony doesn’t feel relieved or accomplished—he feels cheated.

Can it really be this simple? Is one highly unstable formula and a reckless veteran of the Last War all it takes to save the world? Granted, he is in the body of his ten-year-old self, which is odd. Definitely not one of the side-effects Tony can remember. But his age is only a minor setback. If what the world needed was a warrior it wouldn’t have been him whom they would have sent. He should still be able to create the cure once he has procured the necessary equipment; he can worry about the distribution after that.

Except. Tony furrows his brows in concentration, does his best to draw up every single memory he has pertaining the invasion, the war councils, the endless hours spent in labs and workshops. He recalls his arguments with Rogers early on, Pepper sobbing into his shoulder at Happy’s funeral, the March of the Dead Children, the mistakes they made in the beginning and then never again. It’s all there, burned into his mind, with a clarity that he knows will give him nightmares for years to come.

The only thing Tony can’t seem to recall is the enemy. Who they were fighting. What they were fighting. He knows there was something; he knows it destroyed them and he knows they found a cure. Tony balls his bloodied hands into fists, and for the first time, there is something like panic uncurling in his chest.

No. This has to be some sort of sick cosmic joke. It’s just not possible. He can’t have forgotten the cure. He can’t have forgotten the threat. The memories have to be there somewhere, buried perhaps, but they have to exist. They have to.

Tony swallows, almost chokes on the bile rising in his throat. He can’t watch his world be torn apart again, knowing something is coming yet unable to do anything until the threat reveals itself. It will be too late by then, he already knows that. Already lived through it once. And if there is one thing he knows for certain, it’s that he can’t live through it again.

Please don’t make me live through it again.

Tony doesn’t even realise how fast he’s spiralling until the heavy sound of approaching footsteps awakens his deeply-ingrained survival instincts. He is on his feet before he recognises Dead-Eyes, who appears to be carrying two bodies. Two very, very dead bodies. The horrifying sight actually helps grounding Tony once more. It reminds him that he is currently standing on a battlefield, and that, at least, is something he knows so well it’s become routine at this point.

There are seven bodies that he can see—which is not saying much if one takes his current size into account—all of them dressed and armed for battle. Dropping to his knees next to the closest one, Tony turns the male onto his back and looks him over. Early thirties, no memorable features, one bullet wound to the head, two more in his chest. He’s not carrying anything worthwhile except for a small knife that Tony pockets and a badge identifying him as Agent Trent Michaels.

“He’s SHIELD,” Tony muses out loud and crawls towards the next body, where he finds a similar badge.

For a long moment he stares at the IDs in silent contemplation. Then he lifts his head and meets Dead-Eyes’ expectant glance. “Get me the others as well.”

In total, there are eleven bodies, all of them official SHIELD agents. Tony would need access to a database to make sure they’re valid but there is no reason to assume they aren’t. Which leaves two very important questions. One: Why on earth does SHIELD want him dead? Nothing in Tony’s memories hints at a similar occurrence in his past—future—other life. Sure, he isn’t particular chummy with the spy agency, but a death sentence seems a bit much, even by Fury’s standards. Two: How likely is it that they are gonna ask questions first and shoot later once they find their decimated agents? And that’s a rhetorical question.

Seems like Tony’s original plan—get to his old team mates, prove his identity, get into the best lab there is and fix this mess—isn’t so feasible anymore.

Staring down at the motionless bodies of the SHIELD agents, Tony knows with absolute certainty that he can’t contact the organisation, no matter how useful their resources might prove to be. Not without taking unpredictable risks and definitely not without letting Dead-Eyes take the fall for this bloodbath. It would be possible, Tony is sure he could work it out somehow, but he finds himself surprisingly averse to the idea.

By all means, it should be an easy choice. Knowing that his old friends, his self-made family are waiting for him in a home he’d built for them all, alive and well. The idea of getting that back, no matter the dangers, no matter what body he is in, is incredibly tempting. It’s a dream he has held onto for years, finally within his reach, and yet. His eyes find Dead-Eyes’ motionless shadow at his back for a moment and Tony feels his throat closing up and traitorous tears burning behind closed lids because it has never been a choice at all.

For the first time since waking up in a world two heads smaller than every enemy trying to kill him, Tony actually feels ten years old. Because right now he doesn’t want to save the world, doesn’t want to cry himself to sleep over a stupid cure he can’t seem to remember. He wants Jarvis. He wants his parents. He wants to hide under his bed forever.

He can’t go back to being that scared, ten year old ever again and it’s not fair.

Then Tony’s spine stiffens and narrow shoulders straighten with steely determination. “Soldier,” he calls out, the designation falling naturally from his lips. Watches as Dead-Eyes snaps to attention, dark, ever so intelligent eyes focusing on him. It helps, being the centre of someone’s focus. Grounds him in a way Tony had forgotten he could be anchored. “Destroy any evidence of our presence and let’s get out of here. We’re going dark.”

Because above all else, Tony Stark, at any age and in any form, is a futurist.

Tony doesn’t go back. He moves forward.

A little shorter than usual but I promise the next chapter will make up for that. Also, we've officially reached the end of the "introduction" period. All the pieces have been placed on the board. Now it's time to get this game started...

Please let me know what you think, and if you have any theories about where this story goes now I'd love to hear them! Have a relaxing Sunday everybody!

#ReRe writes #Tiny Tony Overlord #Tony Stark #Bucky Barnes #Bix The HYDRA Goon #tiny Tony #deaged Tony #fic #Winter Soldier Bucky #SHIELD is a mess #so is Tony #and so it begins...

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