#he needs to be hosed down

[spaciebabie]

for my birthday tomorrow i think springtrap should arrive ta my house in a giant present box and then live w/me forever and ever and forever after that and cuddle me every night for the rest of time. this should happen. are you hearing me universe

#spacie spoinks #heyyy universe sorry ta ask something of you but i need him #ill hose him down so he's nice 2 cuddle it'll be fine #hes getting BATHED

[waugh-bao]

Keith playing “It’s Only Rock ‘n Roll” (1995)

#… #he needs to be hosed down with cold water or something #the rolling stones #charlie watts #keith richards #old married band #gif set #gifset #voodoo lounge

[feelbokkie]

Every time I see Booster Seungmin or Seungmin rolling his hips to can’t stop, I add another day to his sentence

#he didn’t need to be doing all that while can’t stop played in the background #someone hose him down #feelbokkie rambles

[fishing-for-blood]

New hobby going through every Gortash post and collecting unhinged tags like pokemon cards kicking my feet twirling my hair

#gortash #people be like. #'gortash drives a Nissan Altima' #'i am dunking him in soup' #'he's so ugly I'm going to kill him and eat his eyes (affectionate)' #'putting him in a dog grooming loop and hosing him down' 'nyc sewer rat humansona' 'i need him in a way concerning to feminism' #you guys are killing me #bg3 #enver gortash

[zenkindoflove]

"Tharion blushed slightly. His eruption after ingesting the antidote would take a long while to live down. But there had been so much power—all of a sudden, he’d been overflowing with water, and it was music and rage and destruction and life."

-House of Flame and Shadow

SJM really painting a visual for us.

#tharion ketos #hofas #sathia is gonna be a lucky girl #he's really gonna hose her down #i need help #satharion #sarion

[maladaptivebb]

it’s ridiculous the hold Matthew lillard has on me. This is like the sixth dirty dream I’ve had of him

#matthew lillard smut #matthew lillard #stu macher x you #matthew lillard wet dream #Someone hose me down #He’s got me so bothered and I’m not even hyper fixated on him rn #It’s the other Matthew too old for me #matthew gray gubler #if only if only #need to get dicked down bad

[comraderoscoes]

i’m not exaggerating when i say lewis is the funniest man itw to me 😌

#do i need to stand the fuck up? absolutely #he posts three short tweets and im genuinely say here like his mind!!! #i need to be dragged up off the floor and hosed down

[burningspy]

There are some people in this world that should absolutely not be allowed in public!

At least not until they learn some proper decency for being in more social settings around other people.

I recently got home from the supermarket after doing my weekly grocery run. There was another man there also walking around doing his own shopping while on speakerphone with someone else the entire time, seemingly without a care in the world.

Though, the speakerphone issue was the less annoying thing about this person and also not the reason why you could easily identify where he was inside the store at any given time.

That honor goes to the fact that this man smells like he hasn't bathed himself in at least a month! You could literally smell him from at least two aisles away (I only wish I was exaggerating). The smell would also strongly linger for a few minutes after he had walked away.

It truly was nauseating.

Although, it almost became comical watching other people turn onto an aisle, begin to slow down as they approached an item they seemed to need (that happened to be near wherever this man was standing at the time), then rather quickly walking away as soon as his overpowering stench reached their olfactory systems; essentially deciding either to try and come back for that item later or just forget about it entirely.

People in public like this (which appears to be more and more common over the past couple years for some reason) are a big part of why I don't like leaving home much anymore, unless it is absolutely necessary.

#personal #supermarket horror stories #I'm surprised I survived and didn't at least pass out with as much as I had to hold my breath while trying to get my shopping done #this man also happened to be on almost every aisle I needed to go down. #it didn't matter if I skipped aisles and went back and forth randomly. #he seemed to always be there #or the stench remained after he had recently walked away #You should legally be allowed to walk up to people like that and hose them down with tons of soapy water. #Maybe it should at least be a legal defense for shooting someone with an emergency fire hose.

[newyorkkiss]

likely thing for him to remember

#no genuinely his ability to remember people and places right down to a detail is incredibly impressive and terrifying #also he needs to be attacked with a garden hose. annoying…

[hirokiyuu]

i love dys soooo much he is so good and one of my fave little guys but also he is just a Creacher to me

#still thinking abt that time i was like. hottest men in exocolonist are rex (objectively) and sym (my wife) #and rho was like. i love how you didnt mention dys. and i was like #do you want me to lie #i love dys. im cupping him in my palms. my guy im obsessed with #i want to gently spray him down with a hose he looks like he needs it #tangent i would kiss so so gently under the moonlight #but dys. dys. dys. #personal #this isnt going in my teenexo tag this is just me being a lesbian

[piduai]

Fave Yakuza characters now that you’ve played more?

i'm slow on changing my habits honestly but i did love akiyama and saejima, mostly because i was familiar with them on a surface level and knew i'd like them lol. but i just started 5 today and i think both of them are playable there so i need a bit more time to solidify my impressions... for now it's still ryuji > kiryu > majima and everything after that fluctuating. but i think majima will have to cede his position to saejima eventually so my top 3 will be literally the same dude in 3 different flavors: turbo orphan cologne, prison food and 100 yen bleach 😔

#they're like big muscle man: the return of powerpuff girls #the specimens in question and how they vary: #big muscle man (evil & proud gorilla). big muscle man (stupid & stoic gorilla; prototype). big muscle man (sensitive gorilla) #akiyama is a fun little guy. i like him but he also needs to be hosed down bc you know he hasn't showered in 5 years #anon

[genderfluid-druid]

This $5 Chianti does not in fact pair with this microwave mac-n-cheese with single cheddar bratwurst. But I'm tired and it's the best thing I've ever tasted

#today my dad showed me how to change the shutoff valve for a dishwasher #i didn't mean for him to come visit but i started asking questions like 'ok i have to turn off the upstream valve first right' and #'how do i find the water main' #and for some reason he felt the need to drive ten minutes here to come help 😂 #oh and the initial plan was not actually to replace the valve just to remove the old hose and step down the size with an adapter #but then we turned off the valve and started removing the hose #and there was still pressure #SO we decided that was not a good valve #my dad got. pretty damp. I'm sorry dad

[two-calicos-in-a-trenchcoat]

Harleys started watching horror game playthroughs with me lol

#the jumpscares get her more than they get me lol #not that surprising #shes jumpy in general #there was a hose sitting in a bag by the back door for like a month once and she jumped every time she saw it #if we put something new up on the wall but she doesnt SEE us putting it up she jumps the second she notices it #shes a scaredy cat #but she seems weirdly fascinated by horror games #jumpscares hardly phase me anymore #they used to but ive watched so many horror game playthroughs on youtube that ive been almost completely desensitized #every once in awhile one still gets me #i was also never scared going through haunted houses #i mean i havent been to....well any haunted HOUSES actually #haunted train ride in baldwin was fun #wouldve been more fun if my friend wasnt cutting off circulation from my arm from gripping it so hard #and also if hadnt gotten sick afterwards #but i did make a werewolf self conscious so sorry about that man #told my friend to just say ''whats up'' to the monsters and just fake confidence and the werewolf got right in our faces to say it back #and he had bad breath and was scaring my friend so i told him he needed a tic tac #at the time it was funny but now i feel kinda bad about it #but it had the effect of calming my friend down which was really all i was going for #cuz she seemed on the verge of an anxiety attack and her parents and sister were just telling her to shut up and deal with it #anyway the next year they went without me and she got banned for punching one of the actors when they jumped out at her #hopefully mr werewolf was able to write that off as an 11 year old being a little shit #which i wasnt doing intentionally. id just heard that joke before and was trying to help my friend be less scared #and that was the first thing that came to mind when plan ''feign confidence'' didnt work #the other haunted thing i went to was a haunted canyon tour in the Wisconsin dells #that was fun #the scariest part was a dude walking next to me while dragging a (running) chainsaw on the ground near my feet and i was wearing sandals #and like. im sure you do this every night and youre trained for it and everything.but i dont really know or trust you enough for this my guy

[shaunashipman]

so fucking infuriating when someone gets hired for the job you applied for, and are basically already doing but didn't get for whatever fucking reason, and hear them say they applied for the job because they were "getting bored at home" and were "turning into a couch potato"

so you don't actually need the money and benefits? so you just took a job from someone who actually did need it? like if you're bored and want to do something go fucking volunteer. join a bookclub

#cleo.txt #work rant #like she's a nice enough lady #and they of course gave her the easy section #so i dont work for them and am still having to clean the shit part of the building #and like she comes down and says the shop vac isnt working #because she was pressing the hose release button #instead of the power button #the head custodian said he talked to the big boss about me again #trying to get me hired #but i'm not holding my breath anymore #the interviewers clearly didnt like me #or my attendance #which is a bullshit question to ask when we've had covid the last 3 years #i'm just so fucking tired #and i've got another cold starting #my throat hurts #i'm exhausted and shaky #and i know i need to fucking eat my dinner but i have no appetite

[flatstarcarcosa]

having various concepts/scenes for my ocs in my head i’m still trying to figure out how to string together is actually so funny.

ronnie waking up in a dumpster after getting caught in the backdraft of her own bombs and getting mad that mathias accidentally speedball’d her because her heart stopped and he had to use her implants to shock her and pump her full of adrenaline to get her back online, but the lag in the feedback he receives that she refuses to let him fix caused him to overdose her on the adrenaline so then he had to flood her with a sedative and also, she’s got like 70 seconds to fuck off before the cops show up.

meanwhile, on the other side of the fucking planet, marteese has been out of prison for like two days, took the job offer from sal to help out at the pizzeria and is just standing there going 👁👁 at the oven.

#txt.txt #oc: it never shuts off #oc: soldier boy #also somewhere else ace is probably hosing bailey down because she's refused to come out of the garage for three days #and is caked in oil and grease from working on the cars and he needs her to go do something WORTHWHILE for once #'i should have left you in that warehouse' #'BUTCHA FUCKIN DIDN'T'