#her sister said she's always picking fights with their dad over politics and religion and stressing out her mom whenever she comes home

[kylendooleydesigns]

Hazbin Hotel and My Thoughts on Feminism

This review is in no way aimed at any one specific group or ideology. These are mere opinions that people can choose to agree or not agree with. I am no way trying to sway the minds of anyone who chooses to read this review, people have their own opinions and have the right to express them. Thank you.

First, let me begin with my thoughts on the "modern feminist", I'll get to what I mean by that in a moment. For now, let's start with what the definition of feminism is; Merriam-Webster defines feminism as the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes and the organized activity on behalf of women's rights and interests.

Now, with that said, I'd for everyone to pay attention to the word "equality". Feminism's roots can be traced all the way back to Plato and his classic Republic, where he advocated that women had the "natural capacities" that were equal to that of men for governing and defending Ancient Greece. (Olson, John, History.com) Ever since Plato's advocation for women's equal standing to men, women have been protesting and fighting for their rights to stand at the same political and economic point as their male counterparts. It wasn't until the late 18th and early 19th centuries when women were finally given their right to vote, New Zealand being the first sovereign state to give these rights to their women. After this revolutionary change, women joined in the war efforts of WWII, the Civil Rights movements, and began the Equal Pay Act of 1963, which still continues to this day.

Now, while I admit that the idea that the Equal Pay Act was created in 1963 and we are still dealing with the unfair distribution of pay between men and women, I'd like to bring up a personal point. My mother, who was born in 1963 mind you, has been working since her teenage years. She joined the military, got married, had a kid, divorced, remarried, and had another kid after her time in the military had come to an end, she fighting in the Gulf War before then. With only a military background and no college degree, my mom continued and still continues to work for the government through checking military helicopters for cracks to keep them from falling apart from atmospheric pressure. She's worked like this for over thirty years, seeing people come and go, men getting laid off or getting paid more than her fellow female co-workers. With that said, my mom actually gets paid more than most the men she works with, not only because she's the only one at her workplace who has the qualifications to do her line of work, but because she rarely ever takes time off. In fact, while she was pregnant with me, my mom refused to take maternity leave and went on working in this hazardous workplace despite the many objections of her male co-workers all the way up to my birth, my dad having to travel back and forth to see both my mom and me while he got our current house ready, meaning he wasn't always there to take care of her.

Years later, a female co-worker of hers got pregnant, took her maternity leave and when she got back, she found out a male co-worker had gotten paid more than her since her time away. She of course went off on her supervisor, but here's the thing: because she had taken her maternity leave and was unable to work, her male co-worker had to basically take on a double-shift and do the work she was in charge of, thus receiving pay for doing so.

Growing up in an environment with a mother who was a strong, independent woman after her divorce with a daughter and having to fight in an actual war that may or may not have lead to her sleep apnea and a dad who supported my mom from a different state while she was pregnant, I never saw there being that big an issue with the equality of men and women.

Now, I will say the unequal pay issue does get under my skin; however, the thing about equal pay and equal rights, is that women have to put in as much work and as much effort in their workplace as their male co-workers. Like I said, my mom worked while she was pregnant, thus getting the pay she deserved for the work she put in and her female co-worker who took  her maternity leave and got mad for the work she didn't do went to her male co-worker. I can only imagine how she'd feel about it if the co-worker was a fellow woman.

This brings up my issue with the modern day feminist. Back in the day during the early growth of feminism, the issue was about equality. Now a days, it seems that "equality" is being replaced by "superiority". Here's an example of what I mean, I have more guy friends than girl friends, and most my guy friends are huge gentlemen, always wanting to support and keep us women's spirits up, meaning they enjoy paying for their food and opening doors for them. One such friend was sweet enough to open a door for a complete stranger who happened to be an older woman. Instead of thanking him for his kindness, with no real care that she was a woman, she went off on him and told him that just because she was a woman didn't mean he had the right to treat her like some delicate flower. He was, rightfully so, very confused and a tad hurt. I, Original Fox, a woman, upon hearing this story, called her a "bitch". Here's the thing ladies, people who are nice and do things out of the kindness of their hearts do it because their cool people, they're not doing it to make fun of our physical differences.

With that said, my conclusion to the feminist movement is that I believe in equality, equality meaning we are all treated, act, and do things as equal beings, not one being above the other. I don't care who you are, what you identify by, what your background is, how you handle a situation as a person, or what issues you're dealing with, if you put in the time, effort, strengths, and fight to do what you think you deserve without blaming a certain group: men, women, religion, politics, whatever, I'm rooting for you. Don't listen to the racists, sexists, and closed minded people who want to bring your personal views down and prove to them without putting yourself at the top of the advocate pillar and saying you deserve better without even proving it.

Now, on with the review of Hazbin Hotel.

For those who don't know, Hazbin Hotel is a pilot two years in the making created by YouTube Animator Vivziepop or Vivienne Medrano, who is best known for her Die Young music video by Kesha using her Zoophobia werewolf character Jay Jay. The story centers around Charlie Magne, the princess of Hell, and her hopes to open a hotel for rehabilitating demons and sinners. This plan contrasts with that of the yearly "cleansing" where non-angelic looking angels come and slaughter the inhabitants of Hell to make room for more sinners. Wanting to find a less violent way of hindering this overpopulation, Charlie, along with her manager/girlfriend, Vaggie, and their first client, porn star, Angel Dust, must prove their cause will work in order to keep the Happy Hotel running.

When I heard of this, I was excited and had high hopes. I had been a fan of Vivziepop's work for a long while, enjoying her animations and loving her now on hiatus, Zoophobia webcomic, and when I heard a project she had a huge passion for was going to air a pilot with the help a whole production team, voice actors, and some genuine talent, I was at the edge of my seat and had anticipated the pilot being aired. Does it live up to all the hype? Let's find out!

Well, off the bat, I wasn't all too crazy about the opening. I had been, admittedly, overly excited for the pilot and was expecting something... Different. The opening is your basic musical opening where the main character sings while images of what the world is like moves about around them, which wouldn't be so bad, if the musical number was original. The opening song "I'm Always Chasing Rainbows" was written by Joseph McCarthy and was first performed by Dolly Sisters in the musical Oh, Look! When I found this out, I was a little disappointed. I was probably expecting way too much from this pilot, but at the very least, I was expecting a more original musical number written by the team Vivziepop worked with in bringing this pilot to life. But that's probably just a nit-pick on my part, like I said, I was expecting a little too much from these people.

After the opening, we're immediately introduced to everyone's favorite, slutty spider, Angel Dust and his sassy attitude toward people who want to slut shame him. What follows is what I can only describe as being a story on crack. Everything is shown to us super fast with little time to breathe and explore the setting we are in, which I can understand with Sir Pentious and maybe Cherri Bomb, but with just getting out of the musical number of Charlie singing about how her world isn't the way she wants it to be and being introduced to Angel through a "don't slut shame, because it's their body and no one else's", it just seems like everything happens way to fast and everything is thrown at us without really letting us appreciate what we're looking at, the news scene being no better as they zip through the report of the fight going on and the introduction of Charlie and her "passion project". Again, that may be a little nit-picky as I did have higher expectations.

It's here that I also would have liked to know what the two little demons that help Charlie with her second musical number were and what role they play in her life. I mean, they must be either her mom or dad's henchmen or "help" wherever Charlie's used to live, but I would have preferred they played a bigger role than just singing and playing their instruments.

The third issue I have at this point is the use of sound effects. Again, a little nit-picky, BUT, I feel the use of sound effects with every movement and moment a character is on screen is a little too much. It doesn't help that the soundtrack never shuts up. Music or a sound is always playing, never allowing for us to take in what the character is saying on a more complex or understanding level. The only parts that are quiet are the limo scene and the Charlie calling her mom scene, which are honestly two of my three favorite parts because we get to see and meet these characters, understanding them and their personalities, as well the relationships they have with each other. Except maybe Charlie and Vaggie's, but I'll get to that later.

I enjoy the relationship Charlie does have with Katie Killjoy (in fact I enjoy Katie's relationship with Tom as well), the only critique I have here is Katie's "I don't touch the gays. I have standards." This just seems to be an add-on to make us despise Katie as a character, because of her views on the gay community, basically saying homophobia is a bad trait of a person and makes a character more of a villain, which I've known homophobes. They're not evil, they've just been raised in an environment where being gay isn't the norm and, in a strict background, "the gays" is a mental illness that can be easily taken care of through the proper therapy. As for Katie's "standards", again, this doesn't mean she's a terrible character. In fact, look at it like this, it's an adult cartoon and the jokes are meant to make you laugh, not judge a certain group in a cold and harsh way.

However, Charlie's relationship with the people of Hell as their princess and heir to the throne, I find a little off pudding. I'm sure there's some kind of hidden meaning to how the royal family is treated as celebrities over that of rulers of a certain area, but for now, I'm just gonna nit-pick a little more. My opinion on princesses in the media is at a bit of an all time low. Ever since the birth of the Disney Princess Trope, the views of a princess in any form in the media has been to hate being a princess, sing about how much it sucks to be a princess, remain princess when it's obvious they're no longer a princess and should take the title of Queen. Charlie is sadly part of this trope, the only good part of this being that no one but her girlfriend takes pity on her. What I mean by this is that Charlie shows signs that her father has high expectations of her becoming the heir to Hell and taking rule in his place as the future queen, making her status something to sing about how much that sucks, of course her dreams contrast with that of her father's expectations, like most Disney Princesses. That being said, I'm not exactly sure I see the purpose of her being the princess of Hell when no one treats her as one nor do they seem to care that Lucifer is her father, other than to make her relationship with her father strained, which isn't bad don't get me wrong, but there are other ways to work that subplot in without adding the title of princess to her name.

After the whole fight scene, we get the scene where Vaggie goes off on Angel for making the hotel look like a joke. This coincides with my issue with the whole feminist aspect and her and Charlie's relationship, so I'll get to that later. But I like this part because of the quiet moment we get, so there we go for whatever that was.

When the trio gets home, I do like how we see a subtle hint to the fact that Angel does want to reform and go to Heaven and escape his abusive sugar daddy by how he makes a crack at the lack of food to feed all of the non-existent souls and immediately feels bad. Of course, you can't force change on someone in the blink of an eye, so I give him a pat on the shoulder for not knowing how to apologize for his assholiness.

This then leads us to the calling mom scene where we see Charlie struggling to prove her father wrong and asking her mom for advice for feeling this way. From what I can assume either her folks are divorced, her father is dead and Lilith is in charge of Hell, or Lucifer left that part of his family to marry Narissa from Zoophobia and had Damian. I mean in the opening we see a shadow of Lucifer taking the shape of Zoophobia's version of the Devil, so that's my fan theory and I'm sticking to it! And before people say that's impossible, if that's the case, then Charlies is no longer the heir to the throne, but here's my response to that: Charlie was born first and is the daughter of Lilith, who I'm not gonna get into, because this isn't part of the review, therefore making her take the throne before Damian by political standards. Anyway, this scene was fine, I wish there was more info on exactly what her relationship is with both her parents, seeing as they never make a real appearance in the pilot to show their personalities, but I'd also like it if there was a main character whose relationship with their parents isn't severed because of the character's dreams, a strict family, or dead.

And then HE comes into the picture. THE one character I lost my mind over. Alastor, the Radio Demon!!! I LOVE this character! While I'm sure most fans find Angel to be their favorite character and don't get me wrong Angel is awesome, Alastor is what has me hooked to the show. To compare him to Charlie, Vaggie, or Angel, Alastor, in my opinion, is an optimistic pessimist, something I find myself as being on a daily basis as I too find good entertainment in the destruction of others as they fall into the fiery pits of failure. Not only that, but each moment he's on screen there's this mysterious vibe about him with his permanent smile and his end goal in helping Charlie, something I find rather attractive of my demon... I mean... Men. His interactions with the other characters is fun, he's got a classy excitement to him, wanting to provide and receive entertainment in the most morbid and old times of places. His version of "Inside of Every Demon is a Rainbow" is a hilarious change to Charlie's cheery, uplifting view of her people, his version being a look at the souls in Hell as lost causes, their punishments being eternal, there being no escape except for the life they've lived before and the agony they have to face now is bliss. His take down of Sir Pentious was like a huge "bitch please" which was absolutely wonderful, from his power to his facial expression in the end.

With that said, is this pilot flawless...? No, absolutely not, far from it. There's some things, like the soundtrack, the opening song, and the sound effects I'd think about doubling down on and allow us to take in the world we're being introduced in to. If someone came into this show completely blind, they'd probably be a tad confused as to what's happening and why. Fans already know Charlie is an overly optimistic demon spawn, Vaggie is a pessimistic feminist with no care for men, Angel Dust is a cross-dressing spider who enjoys being the "bad boy", and Alastor is a deer with a need for endless entertainment. People who don't know VivziePop and her work, won't know/care much about these characters going straight in and will most likely like to explore the world and its why.

And now, the coup-de-gras: my one issue with this pilot and what it seems to be shoving down pessimistic people like me's throat. Women rule and straight men suck. Do NOT quote me on this. I do not know Vivienne or the people she worked with to make this pilot. This is MY opinion after having watching the pilot, listening, reading, and following the creation of this show from the beginning. They can correct me on this in future episodes or deeper dives in to characters and development.

So, off the bat, we're introduced to a male gay character who dresses like a woman and is slut shamed by everyone except his friends who have similar views as he does. In my opinion, this doesn't work for me. I get wanting to "represent the minority"; however, the depiction of straight, heterosexual characters slut shaming or having sexual encounter/feelings toward said character with cruel intentions to bring someone down isn't something I see as a good representation. Granted, there are several people out there who will make a person feel like shit for having views that do not conform to what society deems as normal, but in today's world, where media and the children of today are exposed to these views, the "minority" becomes the majority. I get it, life sucks, oh darn, well then fight for equality, don't fight to make straight cisgender community seen as the closed minded community that doesn't give a damn. There are plenty of cisgender heterosexuals who support the LGBTQ+ community and have no problem with anyone who doesn't fit the old views of the world. It just seems, from what I've experienced, that if you're a straight, cisgender human being that has no real tie to the Pride Movement, you're a homophobic monster who takes the side of all the haters. That's not true, we just aren't playing for the same teams nor do we believe we were born in the wrong body.

Next is Charlie and Vaggie's relationship. Don't get me wrong, having a gay lead is no skin off my nose, if anything, I don't give a damn what their attracted to. If their a good character and have good development and don't let their sexual identity get in the way of their goals, I'm good. But when it comes to Vaggie and Charlie, there's just something I personally find "off". For one, VivziePop actually brought this up in a Tumblr post in response to another about how they didn't like the idea of Charlie and Vaggie being a canon couple because it'd just be another way of representing the gay community through the media's abuse of showing how open minded they are, to this VivziePop revealed that Vaggie and Charlie are indeed a couple, but she'd rather not focus on their relationship and instead focus on the story. But upon the pilot's release, their relationship is already put a slight focus on from Katie's "I don't touch the gays" afterwards touching Charlie who Vivzie revealed may be a Bisexual characters having dating a male character in the past and to the overly cutesy peppy girl and her overly protective, pessimistic girlfriend. I honestly don't care about whatever relationship these two have, so long as it doesn't effect the plot in a negative way, one example being that they fight, break up, and get back together through some TV show bullshit that has little to do with the rest of the show's running. This show is about getting demons into Heaven, it's not an after school soap opera.

This brings me to Vaggie's character as a whole and to her views affecting that of the central tone of the show itself. Vaggie is clearly a feminist, this being brought up when Angel reminds her that she doesn't seem to trust any man, any men... Men. She punches a guy who calls her girl a bitch, gets angry at Angel only when Charlie screwed up too by both singing and getting in a fight with Katie when Vaggie specifically told her not to sing as what they were doing was serious, refuses to trust Alastor without allowing him a second chance, something she is helping Charlie to achieve and support despite Charlie herself being open to helping Alastor understand where she's coming from, and calls the hotel a "man cave" just because Husk gets a bar in order to keep him working at the hotel. I get it, alcohol is somehow a sin to the hotel, most likely because it can lead to drunkenness or sloth and gluttony, but that doesn't make it a brothel or a man cave. In fact, she doesn't seem to argue having Nifty, a female character as part of the staff as she just zips around cleaning, but here's the thing about Nifty: it's clear she's straight and how they portray how straight she is contrasts with the other female main characters. Nifty is boy crazy and a clean freak, being confused as to why the hotel is such a dump when everyone living there is ladies, not knowing Angel on a personal level yet and wonders where all the men are. This to me, is a stereotypical straight cisgender female: wanting to clean, make new friends, and meet some men. Being a cisgender, straight, female myself, I can tell you, that's not who I and I hope some other girls are. I've never been much of a clean freak or boy crazy, in fact I'm a bit of a slob and don't really give two shits about men; I've honestly got more important things to concern myself with than over getting a boyfriend. Nifty is a fun character and I enjoy her place in the show, but I would have liked it if Vaggie immediately wanted her out of the hotel as she did with Husk and Alastor, showing some God damned equality as a feminist and if Nifty was a little less concerned about gender roles and having men around. Depicting feminism is fine in media, but don't go overboard with it. Make some straight, cisgender males actually great people who support the ideals of women and don't want to see them fail, show the equality we as women fought so hard to achieve, by making the roles of men and women equal, not one gender being better than the other morally. Alastor is a great character, but he did slap Vaggie's ass, which was unneeded, but I'll admit I found that hilarious. I can only hope Alastor is only fucking with Vaggie and her views on men and turns to a pretty awesome guy who, while not believing in her cause, supports Charlie anyway he can.

All in all, I loved this pilot and see great things coming its way, I just think things could be tweaked and lessened down to be less of a huge middle finger to certain groups of people and less of an Ed, Edd, and Eddy soundtrack of unnecessary sound effects. I'd recommend this pilot to anyone with a passion for animation and wanting to put something you've worked years for to give them that jolt of ambition. If you're bothered by too many loud moments, less quiet moments, too many jabs at the heterosexual cisgender community, and lots and lots of sex jokes, this probably isn't for you. Check it out on YouTube and give it a try.

P.S. to those of the religious community, me being part of it, if the version of this Hell is off pudding and isn't how it should be depicted in comparison to that of the biblical version and it offends you, I suggest either ignoring the pilot completely and its growth, or you can see the horrifying reality behind it... It's... An... Adult... Cartoon!!! *collective gasps* for more information please check Family Guy, South Park, and, I know I'm dating myself here, but literally every episode of the Simpsons ever.

I hope I didn't offend anyone with this rant/review. These are just my personal views and should be taken with a grain of salt.

Eat chocolate.

Imma take a nap!

#hazbin hotel #feminism #vivziepop #vivienne medrano #alastor #hazbin alastor #personal rant #rant #sorry for the rant #review #hazbin review #dont take this the wrong way #grainofsalt

[boudiscanon]

Northern versus Southern Family

So one half of my family is from Michigan and the other half of my family is from Arkansas. And since I've never met anyone who wasn't my cousin who also has a family this radically split between the Mason-Dixon line (bc mine is the ONLY SOUTHERN WHITE FAMILY IN TOWN) lemme show y'all the cultural whiplash that is family gatherings at the grandparents’ for me:

House Aesthetic

North: Immaculately clean, Great Grandma’s china untouched in a hutch, New carpet and/or couch and/or hardwood floors for the kitchen like every other goddamn year, plain crosses, family photo sitting on the mantle, place where large family portrait would normally go instead graced by painting of a wolverine signed by Bo Schembechler, lots of duck hunting motifs, also did I mention clean?,seriously one time my grandma randomly paid me like $20 to just clean the outside and inside of her kitchen cupboard doors for her???

South: Overrun with knick-knacks, tables specifically devoted to knick-knacks and setting up holiday cards from family and church people, photos of every single family member at every single stage of life, furniture all from 1960, textured wallpaper, cross stitchings about Jesus hanging up, “A house is made of bricks and stones but homes are made of love alone”, only cleaned when family is coming up to visit, and then more to make room for all 32549879 of them than to make it look nice, mattresses in every spare room for said 32549879 family members

Openness

North: NO ONE EVER TALKS ABOUT ANYTHING, I am 26 and this year I learned my grandpa has a sister??????, I thought he only had brothers, dirty laundry is not acknowledged in any way whatsoever, prying questions are limited to grandparents asking about what you’ve been up to and some light-hearted ragging over your love life

South: I know all of my Grandparent’s 1700 siblings by first and middle name, and the entire family history, going back to the legend of Great-Great Grandpa Panther Bill back in Bethel Springs, dirty laundry is spread out on the living room floor to sort through especially if it belongs to cousins who aren’t there, any random family member can and will come up to you and instead of saying hello start in with “so has your brother found a job yet? you got a man yet? when you gettin married already? so is your sister gay or what?” and there is no escape, hell you probably won’ even remember which cousin three times removed is accosting you

Food

North: all done by grandma, maybe with a salad brought by my mom, dishes shoved in the dishwasher after, everyone gets one (1) tupperware container to bring home, grandma constantly trying out new recipes and insisting they probably aren’t very good, meanwhile Gordan Ramsey himself would probably kiss her on the lips and hire her on the spot

South: Everyone conspires to stop grandma from doing any actually work much to her consternation, GFS does half the cooking bc you can pick up giant ass pans of scalloped potatoes there and just toss them in the oven, there are always at least two meat dishes two potato dishes three veggies some kind of fluff and some kind of salad brought by aunt lee, not to mention two-three pies and ice cream for dessert, everyone brings home at least one (1) paper grocery bag full of leftovers and fights over who has to bring home the most bc how did we end up with more leftovers than were actually on the table??????, dishes done by hand by moms while grandma tries to help and gets told to sit down and relax, and i cannot tell you how much i suffered growing up being the only kid who knew what hominy and okra were

Conversation

North: politics, current events, the Tigers, gossip about snooty neighbors or snooty church people

South: Jesus, the Lions, gossip about cousins, family stories you’ve heard 17 times but idk it’s tradition?

Thoughts on Death

North: no one mentions getting old or implies in anyway that they aren’t just as spry as they used to be because it give grandpa Anxiety

South: one time my grandma basically kidnapped me and one of my aunts to point out exactly who was to get what when she died, my aunt pointed to a mirror with a gold leaf forest scene on it and called dibs, grandparent constantly complained about joints but also refused to ever sit down ever, basically every conversation with them involved a I Went To The Doctor And He Said update

Religion

North: Reformed Church in America (Calvinist)

South: Assembly of God (Pentecostal)

Thoughts on technology

North: My grandma recently got a laptop and wifi, she answers emails by calling you back

South: Grandparents never figured out how to use their answering machine, had written instructions from us on how to operate their VCR (so they could watch Jackie Chan movies)

Biggest Drama To Date

North: we don’t have family reunions on that side anymore because at the last one (before I was born) two brothers got in a fist fight, got written out of great grandpa’s will and then when he died great grandma refused to write them back in

South: It’s a toss up between maybe one time my great grandpa trapped a man inside a house he then proceeded to burn to the ground, the time that same great grandpa sprayed my dad in the face with pesticide as a kid and almost killed him, and my dad currently being on non-speaking terms with literally the entire family bc he idolized said great grandpa and also grew up to be an abusive insufferable douchecanoe, oh and that one time the sheriff arrested a cousin and two other cousins dueled the sheriff and busted him out, (or, according to one aunt and uncle, the fact that I have not gotten married and pregnant yet)

Levels of Family Pride

North: you’re pretty much good so long as you hate the state of Ohio or disparage the Tigers

South: You are literally expected to fight to the death for even the cousins you haven’t met or Jesus himself will descend from the Heavens to Disown You and the lines between “family” and “cult” are kind of blurred sometimes tbh ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

(Also as a side note because of the difference in accents I have absolutely no fucking idea how to say “pecan.”)

#ambramblings #north #south #this is why when I do that white people thing #where everybody says what percentage of european they are #i just say half dutch half southern #bc that explains way more about me #family #abuse tw

[annisahaps]

Nov 1, 2016

This is my family. We call us “Kepuh 4 aliens”. There are a lot of reasons behind that name.

First, we actually live like aliens. The term alien that people use to describe people who like to alienate themselves. We have our own jokes, and sometimes it’s not appropriate but we do that because it’s fun. We have our own rules that I’m sure people wouldn’t understand why we live that way (and I won’t share it here anyway).

Second, because we live in Kepuh 4. And because there are 4 of us, so it’s kinda perfect.

My dad is a perfectionist. I don’t know but he’s so smart, that is why, I have a dream to marry someone as smart as him. He was the first student who graduate from university in 1984. Then, he took his master degree in Padjadjaran University for six years, yet, he got the best title, again. The last time, he took his doctoral degree in 2011 and finished it after 6 years of family struggle (of money, haha) with the Best Student title again because he get 4 out of 4 of GPA. (Damn, he’s smart!) Now, I proudly called him Dr. H. Setyo Widagdo, SH, M.Hum.

He once told me, “Karena bapak sudah lulus S3, nanti kamu juga harus ambil ya.”

The other side of him is really soft. He loves me, I know. People told me that my dad is kaku as hell, but I don’t think so. He never told me things such as, “O I love you my daughter” and stuff, but he always listens to me everytime, and, yes, I told him everything, literally. He also loves playing stupid with me. I remember when someday, 4 months ago, we were waiting for my mother to pray maghrib together, I threw a pillow to him and pretended that I didn’t do it. For a sec, I thought he would mad at me, but he cheerfully threw the pillow back at me. The other day, when we were waiting for my mother, I asked him to wear my mother’s cloak (mukena) and sit in a chair, tested my mother whether she would recognize it, and yea she did, and the ones who ended up laughed at loud are me and my father, while my mother kinda shock because her husband did stupid thing like that :’)

As a lecturer, he didn’t earn a lot like others, but he did earn a lot of knowledge that he would share to our family. He taught me to live well. To live as a good human being. He taught me that as a person, I have to use my sense to do good, to be kind, to be right. I should not live like a fish that go with the flow, he said. I should create my own flow. But he did say, “Jangan terlalu mengkhawatirkan kegagalan.”

He also a religious person. He pray 5 times a day, reading al-qur'an five times a day, do the sunnah prayer like always, and he also become a speaker (sometimes) to share his knowledge about Islam in a religious forum.

He isn’t romantic. My mother said so. When the first time they know each other, she did not like him. She even told me that when they got married, she hadn’t love him, she married to him because he is the only man that came to her house and get my grandmother approval to be her husband, and since she believe that the permission of her parents is the only thing that matter, she agreed to marry to him. But in the process, she fell head over heels to him, because she knows that she needs someone like him to be the captain of her family ship.

My father is not romantic, indeed. He never said anything romantic, but, I know he loves my mother. He can’t live without her! He never get mad at her. When she did something that made him mad, he keeps silent, or if it is something big, he would go out to his friend’s house just to avoid a fight and come home as if nothing happens. He sometimes said sorry (in a cool way of course) and make a jokes to make my mother laugh again. Believe me, he only did that to my mother, he never did that to anyone, even me!

He also loves taking my mother out. Whenever he gets the opportunity, he would take my mother to go out watching movies, eating dinner, meeting his friends or spending time only two of them in another city just like newlywed (hadeh). He loves my mother so much, he even willing to watch rubbish television show like Rumah Kuya or Katakan Putus just because my mother loves it so much (oh help)

He isn’t perfect, but he is perfect and enough for me.

While my mother, 180° different from my father, is a very cheerful person. Note it, everybody loves her. Even my friends love her more than they love me… She already 54 years old, but she has a very young spirit and soul. My friends has no awkward feeling to go out with her, even when I’m not around.

She is soooo soooo sensitive, she always cried whenever she saw Termehek-mehek when I was in Junior High School. I already told her that it was fake and everything that happen in the show was already planned, but she said, “I know and I don’t care! Don’t disturb me, this show entertains me!” Huft.

She’s not that smart, she has only take her bachelor degree and did not want to continue her study, but she always told me, “Dari dulu Ibu selalu berdo'a anak-anak ibu itu pinter kaya Bapak, jangan sampai kaya Ibu.” Ok, I accepted it, but I do want to look like my mother, because she is beautiful!!! And she’s kind, she’s lovable, she’s talkactive, she’s a good cook, she loves me, she loves her family, and she is both dedicated wife and mother. Is okay Bu, not being smart. The other part of you are also important. And you’re charming. And I love you dearly.

Her passion is cleaning. She loves it when my father goes to the office, because she can clean up! Everytime I put a clothes in my room so I could wear it because the clothes was not that dirty, she would pick it up and threw it to the laundry. She also loves to paint our house all over again, all by herself and she would proudly welcoming my father home, and said, "Bapak rumahnya sudhh bersih sudah ibu cat ulang semua." And my father always worried that she would exhausted from cleaning the house like every single second of her life. Even if my mother come to other house, she would clean up a bit till my father mad at her because it could hurt the house owner's feeling.

She loves making a joke. My father always laugh at her joke. She even making a joke to wake me up in the morning. For example, when I was in High School, I used to sleep after 12 am, and it makes me so hard to wake up early, and when she woke me up, I always told her, “Lima menit lagi, Bu.” Even when my father showed up in a Buto Ijo voice, “Dek Ani, bangun!!! SUDAH JAM BERAPA INI?!” I would easily ignore him, but then, my mother would say, “Loh gapapa Pak, dek Ani hari ini libur… Biarin aja dia nggak sekolah kok hari ini… Nanti aja dibangunin jam sembilan…” and it always works on me because I’m afraid she would really wake me up after nine which is crazy, so I would eventually wake up to take a bath.

The other day, when I hard to wake up (it happens 4 months ago, I guess), she keeps whispering in my ears, “Dek Ani, ayo nak bangun, shubuhan” and I pretend not to hear her and continue my sleep, but then, when I woke up, I realize that she put earrings in my ears (Like…whaaaaaaat) and when I saw myself in the mirror, she said, “Makanya bangun kalo dibangunin, ya,” while smiling.

She is a lovable mom, indeed. She would do everything for me, that is why, my friend would say, “Ani mah dimanja sama Ibunya.” But I don’t care, because yeah, we love each other, do you guys got problems?

My mother is a romantic person, but that is not the thing that make my father falls in love with her. My mother doesn’t win my father heart at first. I’m quite sure that they haven’t fall in love with each other when they tied their knot, but my father always said, “Ibumu itu orangnya baik, sabar, pintar masak. Dijahati sama orang ya tetap baik. Makanya bapak itu suka marah kalo ada yang masih jahat sama Ibumu, orang sebaik itu kok.” And I take it as “I love her,” in different words.

At least, now I know even if my parents didn’t love each other in the first place, they love each other now, and I hope it lasts forever.

The last member of kepuh 4 aliens is my sister. The smartest woman in my family. The only partner to my father to talk about politics because they love it. She knows how to write, how to sing, how to draw, how to argue, how to make people fall in love with her, she knows how to do everything that I wanna do as good as her.

She hates me when I was kid, she wrote in her diary that I look like a devil when the first time she saw me in hospital when I was born. She hates me because she thought that my parents would stop loving her. But, of course, the hatred continue until we both growing up because I followed everyting that she did. We wanted to kill each other everytime we argue, but the moment she leaves our house 8 years ago, changes everything. We live our life separately and we acknowledge our love for each other.

She taught me a lot. About life, about love, about our religion, she always give me new knowledge, new insights, and I’m so proud having her as my sister. She is a woman version of my father. Hell, she is smart. She is the person I wanna be. She is my role model.

And those are the things about my lovely Kepuh 4 aliens that I wanna share with you.