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#holey sh¡t
6cunning6linguist6 · 1 month
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Aria Spears
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bailey6too6bailey · 18 days
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"Holey Sh¡t"
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night-owl-249 · 7 months
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HOLEY MOLEY IT FINALY HAPPENED!
AMAZING DIGITAL CIRCUS IS FINALY HERE! HOLY SH*T!
I was Gooseworx's fan for a long time, even before she made any animations, so It's so surreal (pun intended) to see such things as these happen infront of me.
Ho Unlucky that I decided to write about carnival and jester themes recently, oh well, may steal some ideas along the way.
youtube
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artificialpomogranite · 8 months
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Holey sh×t there are 80 of you I'm scared.
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pendragon1400 · 7 months
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DND
I don't play DND often, but once I remeber I had a cleric and the DM gave everyone like starting loot and I was given holy armor. I was like "Wow thank you! It's blessed armor!"
DM:"No, like holey. There are holes in your chainmail it won't protect you worth Sh*t."
Me:"Oh..."
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sarahlovesstartrek · 5 years
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non-native English speaker: “Hello friends, I wish to inquire about this thing. I thank for for your response, and I would like to apologize for my poor English skills.”
me, has spoken English and only English since day one: “”whaz up my peeeps, thnx fro comin ot my cribz”
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survivor-of-flames · 4 years
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Vin uses the last name Venture more than Elend does, and she only married him after killing all other holders of the name. Does Vin think she got a last name through right of conquest?
Holey sh*t you’re right, she did kill Everyone Else with that last name. So she very well might think she got it through right of conquest. That’s gotta be super weird for Elend ngl like “the love of my life killed my father and secret brother, I’m still totally in love with her but also what the f*ck”
(i’m so sorry i have no idea when you sent this, i’ve been on tumblr for like 4 years - granted primarily on mobile - and only just discovered the inbox lol)
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blueluneacy · 4 years
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God now I'm just imagining the Sib t-posing in the doorway going "Hello Parental Figures" and while Bruno is just confused Wine Dad just sighs and says "Hello, Problem Child No. 2." Mista looses his sh*t laughing. Bruno realizes he is the other parental figure. Nara's a bit confused and asks them about it later (He's trying to be discreet about it, but everyone can hear it-) and the sib just goes, "Our bio dad?? Never heard of him. I just know our Zipper Dad, Wine Dad, and our weird Gun Uncle-".
EXACTLY FDJKDKJDKJ
Fugo becomes holey brother, giorno is piss brother, and trish becomes multiplication sister. We’ve cracked the code.
Someone please free Abbacchio from being a parent or he might free himself. Bucciarati meanwhile, has the adoption paperwork all set up.
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sarahjewell-blog1 · 5 years
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Happy New Year!
Yeah, I know - its the 16th already... but life is busy! So its time for NY resolutions, reflections, and a few updates.
So FIRST, NY resolutions!
1. This year, I will buy no new clothes.
2. I will do real, heart rate rising exercise on a regular basis.
3. I will take my sustainable journey outside the four walls of my house.
1. Bit of a low waste no brainer! I haven’t been a big fashion spender for a while - having never had disposable income like a lot of my peers, and also not being comfortable with my body until a few years ago, my prime clothes buying twenties disappeared without me really noticing! So this should be reasonably easy, bar the fact that I have a lot of holey half decade old clothes that werent designed to last... #accidentalminimalism on the horizon I guess?!
2. I am lazy A.F. fortunately my job is so horrifically stressful, and involves never sitting down, that I am clinging on to being a size 10. yikes! Also, you only get one body. Don’t be a dick to it ;)
3. Its GREAT going on my low impact journey! My boyfriend is really enjoying it too, in slightly diffferent ways, and together I’m super proud of where we are and where we are heading. Buuuut, it would be SO nice to spread the eco joy a bit further!
SECOND: reflections 
I feel like this could go on a bit, so I will bullet point to try and be succinct.
- I feel more intentional, and being intentional is GREATLY pleasing. I never get buyers remorse, I dont waste things/food/clothes, and I know more about where the stuff I get comes from.
- I watched a LOT of documentaries last year. Some were upsetting, but I needed to watch every one because knowledge is power guys. When you know more, you can do more, and change more. My advice with them is to take a broad swipe: take environmental/climate change, fast fashion, cotton industry and food industry as a starter. With the food ones, watch at least 2, to avoid the very strong bias from some film teams/directors. I still eat fish 2 nights a week, and for now I’m okay with that.  
- People are genuinely interested. Most people will at the least ask you questions and quite often theyll tell you they bought a bamboo toothbrush or bar shampoo a few weeks later. Good people like to be good people, if you see what I mean! 
- This sh*t is addictive. My boyfriend is SO on board - especially now we live together and I can beeswrap, glass jar, and minimise to my hearts content!
THRID: going forward...
- I have started an eco group at my workplace (an SEN primary) and it is SO exciting. Watch this space
- Our food habits and lifestyle choices are next on my to do list! 
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6cunning6linguist6 · 1 month
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Jill Hardener
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bailey6too6bailey · 2 months
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"Taste the 🌈"
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Bailey Jay
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appache110 · 3 years
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PEOPLE ARE NAIVE AND HATH NO UNDERSTANDINGS WHAT SOEVER OF WHAT BE HAPPENING WHEN THERE IS THUNDER LIGHTNING, HURRICANES, TORNADOES AND VOLCANIC LOVER ERUPTIONS AND WHAT BE GOING ON WITH THAT AND WHY IN THE SPIRIT REALM MILITARIES AND POLICE EMPLOYEES WOULD JUST QUIT THEIR JOBS BEING DESPERATES FOR A JOB LIKE THAT ARE NOT PAYING ATTENTION TO THEIR RELIGIOUS LIFE, LOVE, LAUGH, ALIVE BOOK NAMED “ THE HOLEY PIPE PULL AND PUSH AND PULL AND PUSH AND PULL THE HOLEY PIPE PULL OF THE LORD = LO ROD IN CHEESES CRIES. YOU SEE PEOPLE IN GENERAL FEELS THAT WE STUPID HUH, AND I SEE WHAT YOU’S PEOPLE ARE DOING BECAUSE, THY ANGELIC BEAMS ARE SPILLING THE BEANS UNTO EYE O.K. THEN YOU’LL BE SAYING AMEN = AMAN = AMEN YUP BECAUSE, EVERY WOMAN, WHO IS, CHEESES CRIES THE SAVOR AND AROMAS NEEDS AMEN = AMAN ALSO, NEEDS CHEESES CRIES, SO THAT, YOU ALL CAN, NOT PRAISE THE LORD, BUTT RAISE THE LO ROD IN CHEESES CRIES SHE’S CUT AND GUT SOME SAVOR FOR USE HALL. GREETINGS, LET’S ELABORATE ON HOW THE LORD IN JESUS CHRIST WASHES YOUR SINS AWAY. NOW, LET US GET THE PICTURE AND MIND CONCEPTUALIZATION RIGHT BY USING THE CORRECTLY SPELLINGS. IT GOES RATHER LIKE, THE LORD = LOROD = LO ROD IN CHEESES CRIES WASHES YOUR SINS = SINSATIONS = PAST LIFE, LAUGH, LOVE, LIVE SENSATIONS AWAY. NOW, THE LORD = LOROD IN CHEESES CRIES MAKES REBIRTH = REBATH = SON RAY BATHS = SON RAY BLOOD CLEAN SING BATHS A MANY A BLESSINGS = BLED SINGS. THE LORD = LOROD IN CHEESES CRIES IS MUSIC = HARD ROCK MOO SICK = RHYTHM AND BLEWS MOO SICK = HOLY GOSPELS IS CORRECTLY SPELLED THE HOLEY GASPELLS = HOLEY ORGAN GAS SIM SPELLS MOO SICK, IN WHICH EVERY WOMAN THAT CLIMAXES IS CHEESES CRIES AND THEY WOMEN ART HOLEY, THEY CUT AND GUT HOLES ALL IN THEM SH*#!T YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT. THE URGES OF THE ATTRACULOVE = A TRACK YOU LOVE MAKES IT IRRESISTABLE FOR PRIMATES TO INDULGE IN THE PROCREATIONS OF THE LORD = LOROD IN CHEESES CRIES TO INDULGE IN THE FORBIDDEN FRUITS OF YOUR GARDENS OF EVE = MILK CARTONS OF EVENINGS = MILK CARTONS OF EVENING IS RHYTHM AND SPIRIT LIGHTS BLEW. YOU SEE, WHEN YOU’RE INTO THE GARDEN OF EATHE = MILK CARTONS OF D EATHE = D EATH PRINCIPLE = GENESIS CHAPTER 3 VERSE 3 EXPLAINS WHAT HAPPENS IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE VIOLATIONS THE CHURCH = JUDGE = CHURCH = CHARGE = CHURCHA = CHURCHA YOU BETS BELIEVE IT. THY COUPLES HAVE COMMITTED, THUS, CONGREGATION FOUNDATION THAT WROTE THE BOOK CALLED THE KING JAMES FOUNDATION REALLY CONFUSED THE SITUATION OF CHRISTIANITY = CREASE CHEESE AND NUTTY, IN THE ACCOUNT, THAT THE 99% OF THE TOTAL MASS WORLD POPULATIONS ARE VERY MIXED UP AND CONFUSED CONCERNING THIS MATTER. THE LORD = LOROD IN CHEESES CRIES MAKES CHRISTIANITY = CREASE CHEESE AND NUTTY POSSIBLE FOR PEOPLE TRAPPED IN THE SPIRIT EATHER = ETHER = EFIRE FLAMMABLE GASES TO BE SAVED BY BEING BORN ARE SATIN HERITAGE AND REBORN FOR AFRO HERITAGE = BEING PORN ONE SHOT DEAL FOR SATIN HERITAGE AND SON RAY PORN AGAIN FOR AFRO HERITAGE. YOU BE SAYING IN YOUR HYMS = HIMS WOMAN THAT YOUR LORD = LOROD IS A ROCK. YOU ALSO, SAY CHEESES IS GOD = CHEESES IS CUT = CHEESES IS GUT = CHEESES ARE WOMEN CLIMAXINGS AND FOR THE LORD IN CHEESES CRIES IS CLIMAXINGS ASS CREASE CHEESE AND NUTTY = CHRISTIANITY AND THE WISDOM, I AM SERIOUS BECAUSE, THE ANGELS BE SPILLING THE BEANS TO ME YOU SEE. FOR CHEESES CRIES = WOMEN ART HOLEY AND IS, NOT GOD, BUTT CUT YOU SEE, LEARNING TO BREAK THE SPELL OR RATHER, MISSPELLINGS AND LEARN VOWEL SOUNDS OF WORDS PLUS, TO USE COMMON SENSE IS HOW YOU LEARN TO READ THE BOOK NAMED THE = ( THE HOLEY PIPE PULL OF THE LORD = LOROD IN CHEESES CRIES IS THE HOLY GOSPELS = HOLEY GAS SPELLS = HOLEY ORGAN GAS SIM SPELLS OF = OVEN GAS SPELLS THE LORD IN CHEESES CRIES. NOW, BEFORE BABIES CUM THROUGH THEY WERE ALREADY FULLY WHAT WOULD BE CONSIDERED AS ADULT THEN THE ANGELS TRANFORMED THEM INTO BABIES WASHING AWAY PAST LOVED, LIVED, LAUGHED, LIFE SINS = SINSATIONS OF THE FIVE PHYSICAL SENSES = SINS = SINSATIONS OF SIGHT, TASTE, SMELL, HEARING, FEELING AND TOUCH OF PAST LOVED, LIVED PLEASURES AND PAIN AND WASHED AWAY HOW? WASHED AWAY BY THE LORD IN CHEESES CRIES ARE OUR FATHERS AND MOTHERS = FEATHERS AND MEATHERS = F EATHERS AND M EATHERS = EATH ERRS = D EATH ERRS BEING, THAT SOME AFRO MALES AND FEMALES NEVER DYE SPIRITUALLY JUST BE DEAD PHYSICALLY BUT SOME AFRO PEOPLE NEVER DYE SPIRITUALLY WHEN STILL HAVING THEIR CELLULAR BEAN SEEDS INNER SPIRIT SON LIGHTS QIZMZ. THE LORD IN CHEESES CRIES ARE ALL OUR PARENTS BEES TAKING THE PLACES OF THE PEOPLE OF THE PAST WORLDS AS THEIR OUR SAVIORS BECAUSE, THE MAJORITY OF US ON THE AVERAGE BE COMMITING VIOLATIONS IN THE SPIRITUAL GARDENS OF EATHEN = EATHE = EATH. THY PAST LOVED, LAUGHED, LIVED, LIFE SENSATIONS OF THE BRAIN 5 SINSATIONS HAS BEEN WASH AWAY BY THE PAINS AND SUFFERINGS OF CHEESES CRIES HAVING CONTRACTIONS AND GOING INTO CHILD LABOR, ARE THE PAINS AND SUFFERINGS OF CHEESES CRIES AND THE BLOODSHED OF CHEESES CRIES ALL OVER THE BABIES THEN WIPPING THE BLOODSHED OF CHEESES CRIES OFF OF EVERY NEW PORN BABY. THIS PRINCIPLE PROCESS IS QIZA = QIZIRE SON DAYS, CREASE MASS SON DAYS = A WOMAN’S VAGINA HAS ( CREASE ) AND TUCK FOLDS, THE MASS IS BLOODSHED WITH THE PLACENTA MASS = MASS SONDAYS = THE HOLE PROCESS OF THY BABIES COVERED IN THY MOTHER = CHEESES CRIES BLOOD IS MASS AND SON DAYS ARE THE INNER SPIRIT SON LIGHTS INHERITANCES AS THY FATHERS AND MOTHERS ONLY BEGOTTEN SON LIGHTS THE PUBIC HEIRS ARROW MAR FUNKY MUSIC = FUNKY MOO SICK ANGELS GIVES TO THE BABIES AS THEIR INHERITANCES FROM THY PAIRS RENTED ASUNDER = RENTED A SON TEAR = RENTED A SON TORE = BECAUSE, OF THY PAIRS RENTED TORN AWAY FROM INNER SON LIGHT BY WAY OF THEIR MILK CARTON OF EATHE VIOLATIONS, THUS, ALL OUR PAIRS RENTED TOOK ON ALL OF OUR CHILDREN’S PAST LIFE VIOLATIONS AND INIQUITIES FOR BEFORE THE BABIES WERE PORN UNTO CHEESES CRIES BEING THE WOMEN, NOT ONLY WERE THE CHILDREN FULLY ADULTS FOR THEY WERE DEAD FOR THEY HAD DYED SPIRITUALLY AND DEAD PHYSICALLY. FOR THE CHILDREN AREN’T DEAD ANYMORE BECAUSE, THY PAIRS RENTED = PARENTS HAS TRADED PLACES WITH THE PEOPLE IN YOUR PAIRS RENTED HOUSEHOLDS BEING THE CHILDREN THROUGH THE LOVE ALL PAIRED SPOUSES HAVE FOR EACH EATHER SH#*^@T TO INHERITANCES OF OUR PARENTS ONLY BEGOTTENSON LIGHTS IS IS A REAL CUT AND GUT DEAL. LOVE = LOVENDER IS PINK = LOVE IS PINK = LOVE IS D EATH PHYSICALLY AND SPIRITUALLY. OUR MOTHERS WE CALL MUMMY FEEDS HER VAM LEE = FEEDS HER VAM IS FLESH, BLOOD, CAN GUTS AND COLD ANIMAL CUTS. OUR MUMMIES FEED THEIR VAM LEE’S WITH LOVE IS PINK AND THE LOVE OF THE DEAD AND DECEASED FLESH BEING PINK WHEN BITTING INTO THE ANIMAL’S FLESH IS PINK AND DEAD AND WHEN THY SPOUSES SPREAD THEIR LEGS ITS PINK AND DEAD PRINCIPLE DO YOU’S CUT AND GUT IT. THE LEE IN VAMLY IS DAIRY LEE GOATS AND COWS MILK AND MILK BY PRODUCTS LIKE YOGURT, COTTAGE CHEESE, CREAM CHEESES, SOUR CREAMS, ICE CREAM AND THE CHEESES CRIES AND THE ( S ) PARMALOT MILKS AND BLUE CHEESE DRESS SINKS. WHEN THE CHILDREN CALL THY PAIRS RENTED DAD IS DEAD AND MOMMY IS MUMMY FOR THE MUMMIFICATIONS OF PRESEVING = PRESERVATIVES, THE DEAD ANIMAL PARTS IN THE REFRIGERATOR MORGUES AND AIR TIGHT CAN CUT GUTS. THE BOOKS OF THE DEAD HAS TAKEN PLACE PHYSICALLY AND SPIRITUALLY DUE TO THE DECEASED ANIMALS BEING EATEN AND SPIRITUALLY, ON THE ACCOUNTING DEBITS, OF THY MILK CARTONS OF EATHER = EFIRE FLAMMABLE SPIRIT GASES BY PARTAKING OF ALL THY PAIRS FORBIDDEN MILK CARTONS OF HOLEY ORGAN GAS SIM SPELL VIOLATIONS OF THE EATHERS OVEN HEAT GASES = LOVEN HEAT GASES = VOLCANO LAVA HEAT GASES. YOU SEE YOU’S PEOPLE’S WORLDWIDE A JUST A BE VIOLATING PRINCIPLES IN A TAILY LIKE YOU’S ALL A DULL T’S ARE 5 YEARS OLD. YOU DON’T LIVE, LOVE, LAUGH, LIVING THIS EARTH’S SUBSISTANCE ON HOW AND THE WAYS YOU FEEL BUT BY PRINCIPLES IS THE WAY YOU LIVE. THE ANGELS SAYS THAT A DULL T’S ARE GUILTY PHYSICALLY AND SPIRITUALLY BY HOW YOU EAT, HAVE SEX MILK CARTONS OF EATH = D EATH VIOLATIONS, BRUTALITIES, KIDNAP JAIL INCOSERATIONS, MURDER. A DULL T’S ARE ( ALL RED DAY ) CHURCHES = CHARGED = CHURCHED = JUDGED = CHURCHED = JERCHED = CHURCHED = CHORCHED = ALL RED DAY F#*&D BECAUSE, OF NOT LIVING BY SPIRITUAL PRINCIPLES THAT COVEN ( $ = ST ) ( S.O.S EYE TEASE = SOCIETIES ) CANNOT HELP YOU NOW AS CHURCHED. SCROLL READING IS PROFOUND AND INSPIRED BY THY ANGELS SPILLING THE BEANS TO ME O.K. TO CONTINUE FOLLOWING DO SUPPORT AND SPONSORSHIP TO COVER COSTS FOR PAPER, INK, HIGH SPEED PRINTERS, BOOK COVERS, MARKETING, ADVERTISING, PUBLISHING AND DISTRIBUTIONS. ALL SERIOUS INQUIRIES ARE TO EMAIL: [email protected]
DO SHARE THESE SCROLLS READINGS WITH FAMILY, FRIENDS AND ASSOCIATES.
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wwilloww · 4 years
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SH. (they/them v.) | jjk
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THIS VERSION IS WRITTEN WITH THEY/THEM PRONOUNS. YOU CAN READ WITH SHE/HER PRONOUNS HERE
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PAIRING: Jungkook x Reader (they/them) ft. OT7
RATING: Explicit.
GENRE: NonIdol!Au. Wilderness!Au. f2l. Smut. Fluff.
WC: 6k
SUMMARY: How could you say no to a month away in the mountains with your friends after six months of grueling quarantine?
WARNINGS: YN is a cuddling fiend. Untimely boner. Handjob. Nipple play. Fingering. Unprotected sex. Size kink. Slight voyeurism. Power play. Dirty talk.
AN: This is a little bit of a test for a potentially longer series. So please please please tell me what you think, what you wanna see, what you think is going to happen!! 💕😉
This version is also a bit of a test. As someone who identifies with multiple pronouns and who has varying levels of comfort/discomfort reading certain reader insert depictions, this felt like the right thing to do with this story. I’m happy to hear your experience with it! 
THIS IS GOING TO BE FILTHY STRAIGHT DIRTY FILTH
BAD PLOT ALERT AHEAD
Thank you to @hauntedlilies​ and @hesperantha​ for being the most beautiful beta readers ever. And of course, millions of kisses and hugs and thanks to the loveliest @thatlongspringnight​ for going off a cliff with me last night and helping me to plan ahead.
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next chapter ->
|| join the taglist || masterlist || read with she/her pronouns ||
©wwilloww Do not repost, translate, or use my stories without my permission.
Chapter One
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“Shh, baby,” he whispers in your ear. “Do you really want them to hear?”
Still, you can’t help the little “Oh,” that slips from you when he drags his cock out of you oh so dangerously slow and then rams back in.
Each thrust pushes you up against the kitchen counter.
The rest of the boys are in the other room, the movie playing not quite loud enough, filling the space of the previously lazy Friday night.
God, he feels so fucking good inside you. And yet, you hadn’t meant it to happen like this.
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You’d always said that summer was your favorite season. But as you watch the light begin to fade from the sky, baby blue transforming into gold flakes of light that whirl across the gravel road, you think you might just have to change your mind.
The light glows and flickers through the pine trees as your car climbs the final hill to your destination. You begin searching for the cabin, although it’s nowhere in sight.
It’s the first day of a season away in the mountains. Two weeks ago your roommate, Namjoon, had bumbled into your tiny city bedroom, and just stood there for a moment before asking if you liked the mountains.
“Sure I do,” you replied.
He grinned. “Would you ever want to live there?”
“I mean— yeah, but like, work and quarantine and—”  
“Aren’t you working from home?”
“Yeah.”
“And haven’t we been quarantined — more or less — for six months?”
“Yes…” you said slowly.
“Then if those are your only hesitations, it’s settled!”
You’d stood from your little bed at that point. “What are you on about Namjoon?”
“I got a house in the mountains.”
“You got a house? In the mountains?”
“Details, buddy, details. I’m going, for a month or two — but probably until the spring. And I’d love it if you came with me.”  
It was as simple as that.
An offer, presented and received.
Perhaps six months locked away in your tiny city apartment had done you a bit of good. Decisions which you once might have weighed against reasonability or responsibility seemed to fall away. Instead, you did what you needed to do and the rest was up to whim and will. In recent weeks, you noticed it in the smaller things too. Eating when hungry. Moving when restless. Searching out company — virtually or in the form of your very large, but not very cuddly roommate — when lonely.
So when Namjoon offered you a season spent away from the prison walls of your tiny shared apartment, there was no hesitation.
“It’s all taken care of,” he had said with a gentle shoulder nudge when you persistently bugged him about chipping in. “Don’t worry about it.”
And even better than that, Namjoon had somehow rounded up your friends — even Yoongi who no one could tear away from his studio equipment.
The boys had already spent a night up at the cabin while you wrapped up some things in the city, packed a duffle bag, and headed out towards the great, yawning wilderness.
You were excited to see them. Quarantine had left you with little opportunity to spend quality time with your friends, and after 6 months in isolation with your roommate you were socially starved, and frankly, touch starved too. Namjoon tolerated your morning hugs, but the two of you weren’t really on the same page in terms of sharing physical affection the rest of the time.
Still scanning the trees for a cute lil log cabin, your eyes widen in shock as a building comes into view.
This is no cabin.
Before you stretches a beautiful home, designed with a graceful balance of smooth stonework, warm wood, and modern glass. A long driveway winds up a gentle hill. Are you sure you put the right address in? You think as you pull up in front of the house. But through the windows, you can see Jimin standing, waving at you.
What the actual fuck.
You park the car at the foot of the stairs leading up to the house, unbuckle the food from the passenger seat (would you dare risk the safety of Jungkook’s dinner?), and ascend the stairs. The door before you stands twice your height. Wrought iron vines tangle across a warm, dark wood. Just as you’re about to attempt to knock with your elbow, the door swings open.
“Baby!! You made it!”
You’re barely in the door, arms full of takeout, when he comes to wrap around you. It’s like all the time between you has washed away, replaced by the laughter bubbling through your chest. It’s been months since you saw your friend, months since you were held like this. It’s so easy to melt into his touch.
“Not your baby,” you correct, although you smile at the embrace.
“Not yet,” Hoseok teases back. “You know I would give you exactly what you need.”
“Is that a proposition?”
“I’m always propositioning you, it seems.”
You twist around to properly raise your brow at your teasing friend.
“Mhmm, seems like it.”
He winks at you, a playful smile teasing at his features. He bends down to press a kiss to the curve of your shoulder and kind of sways you back and forth. You stumble a bit, still carrying the heavy bags of food, but he holds tight to you anyways.
“Is this all you brought?” Hobi murmurs against you. “Just food? For the whole week? No clothes?”
You laugh. “My bags are in the car. I just figured you all would want to get your greedy little paws in some dinner first.”
“You brought food?” Jungkook peaks his head in from the living room.
“You didn’t think I would forget, did you?”
“You always know exactly how to take care of us, don’t you?” Jungkook comes to grab the three bags of takeout from your hands while Hobi still clings to your back like a koala.
“C’mon, Hobi, lemme go.”
As soon as the words leave you though, you regret it. He loosens his grip on you and the cool wash of the autumn air washes in through the still-open door behind you, replacing the warmth of his touch.  
“Promise you’ll be my cuddle buddy during the movie?”
“Course.”
How could you say no?
Perhaps that’s exactly where it all started. With them, there was nothing you wanted to say no to.
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After a boisterous dinner, dishes being passed to and fro, jokes being shouted above the racket, more than one glass of wine downed — you all slump on the couches, full and exhausted and content.
“Movie?” Jungkook suggests, one leg thrown over you as you lean into Taehyung’s chest. He strokes your hair gently and you swear you could fall asleep like this, blissed out and wrapped in his arms.
“PJs first,” Jin declares from the kitchen, emerging as he wipes his hands with a dishtowel.
“Ugh, thank god,” you groan, sitting up from the couch.
“I can’t believe you’re wearing jeans,” Jungkook laughs. “What kind of world do you think you’re living in?”
“Obviously one where we put effort into our appearance,” Jimin sings, eyeing Jungkook’s oversized holey t-shirt and sweatpants combo.
“Fine,” Jungkook says. “I’ll change.”
“Where, uh, where should I change?”  
“Bedroom?” Yoongi cuts in, not even removing his eyes from his phone screen.
“Oh!” Jimin claps his hands together, turning back to face you. “We saved the best for you. Well, for you and Hobi.”
“Hm?”
“The master suite. There weren’t enough beds — and we figured a king-sized bed for two would be better than the couch for one?”
Hobi chips in: “Unless, of course, you’re uncomfortable, in which case I’ll sleep on the—”
“No, no, no.” You shake your head, stopping him in his tracks. “Nothing wrong with a lil more warmth in the world.”
“Good,” Jimin nods. “We figured putting the two of you cuddle freaks together anyways would be best for our sanity too.”
You sling the duffle bag you left waiting by the front door over your shoulder and follow your friend down a long glass hallway. The night has painted the exterior dark, but as you look down, you realize that the glass above and on either side of you is also beneath you. You’re walking over a bottomless bridge, the swirling darkness beneath you seeming to reach up towards you.
A squeal escapes you and you lunge forward, grasping onto Hobi’s arm.
“Shit!” You basically drag him forward, refusing to let go of him but desperate to get off of the glass floor. He chuckles at you but complies.
“Don’t worry, I got you. I freaked the first time too.”
He wraps you up again in his arms and more or less waddles you forward to where the hardwood begins again.
“See? All safe!”
Heat floods your cheeks as you look back down the long glass hallway.
“It looks a little less terrifying on the other side of it,” you sheepishly admit.
Hoseok chuckles and tugs you forward. You enter a large bedroom. Atop a large platform sits an extra large white bed with throws and pillows. You drop your bag and sprint towards the bed, launching yourself so that you land square in the center.
“Ah,” you sigh, taking what you think might be your first deep breath of the day. You spread your arms and legs out as if about to make snow angels. You prop your head up and take a look around the room while Hobi pads over to a large closet where he seems to already have unpacked.
The room is surrounded on two sides by entirely glass walls. The light that spills from the lamps that have already been lit makes it so beyond the walls, everything looks pitch black. Lush, fluffy carpets are scattered around the room, and in the corner is a small personal library, a little couch, and an armchair. And in the very center of the room is what you can only imagine to be an indoor fire pit.
Hobi throws a t-shirt in your face, breaking you from your thoughts.
“Get changed, slowpoke. I’ll take the bathroom.”
While Hobi changes in the bathroom you pull on the large t-shirt he threw at you and a pair of sleep shorts. While you wait on him, you scroll through your phone.
“Do you know what lies behind this door?” Hobi calls from the bathroom.
“What? No? Isn’t it a bathroom?”
“J-Hope’s hot body!” Your jaw drops before you are letting your phone fall to the mattress beneath you and laughing hysterically. He peeks his head out the door. He’s not wearing a shirt and you swallow quickly as you graze over the soft slope of his shoulders and the chiseled valley of his collar bones.  “Aren’t you curious?”
You quickly right yourself.
“Course I’m curious!” you laugh. “Who wouldn’t be curious?”
He grins at you. Sends you a wink.
“All you gotta do is ask, babe.”
“Get dressed, dummy.”
“Dummy that you love,” Hoseok corrects.
“Yes, my beloved little dummy.”
You wave him off and, taking your phone, head out back to the living room.
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Jungkook plops down on the couch where he was before, next to you. You’re not sure if you’re hallucinating after so many months apart from your friends, but it seems like he’s hovering. He sat next to you at dinner. Insisted on you staying in the kitchen while he washed the dishes to chat with him. He was waiting for you in the glass hallway too after you had changed, leaning casually as if he had just stumbled in — but other than the master suite, there was nothing on the other side of the bridge. He had been waiting for you.
“I missed you,” he says, a soft smile spreading over his features.
“I missed you too.”
“It’s been weird not having everyone around all the time—”
“--Too quiet.”
“Exactly.”
Your impulse is to ask him where he’s been, what he’s done — but you know. The eight of you have kept in touch regularly over quarantine. Your group chat, while filled with memes, has kept all of you updated on your daily routines for the past six months. You know where he’s been all these months, what he’s done, and yet there is still a new kind of distance.
You think he feels it too because he’s soon opening his arms, inviting you. You crawl over the couch to him and he wraps his limbs around you, cocooning you in a strange but nonetheless comfortable position.
As you sigh and settle into his embrace, you realize he feels like a new man.
There is a quiet kind of confidence to him that you hadn’t noticed before. An ability to sit still and silently and find comfort in that.
God, it’s sexy.
What? Your eyes shoot open at the thought. But before you can do anything about it, Hobi is tripping into the living room. His smile falters when he sees you and Jungkook all wrapped up.
“They promised—”
“I know,” you groan, sitting up from Jungkook. He frowns at the loss of contact. “Come ‘ere.” You reach your arms out towards Hoseok, but instead of joining you and Jungkook he hooks his arms around you and pulls you into his chest as he sits down.
“Like a little ragdoll,” Jungkook chuckles.
“I’m not a doll,” you huff, only upset at just how easy Hobi was able to haul your body across the couch.
“A little bit of a doll.”
Hobi wraps his arms around you as you lean back into him. You’d always end up like this with the young man, one of the two wrapped around the other. It was well known that out of all of your friends, the two of you were the most touchy. However, sometimes it seemed like more than that, as the two of you almost always gravitated towards each other in any group setting. It was just as simple as that. Hobi was by your side, no matter what.
The others come to settle into the living room, setting up in various levels of absolute exhaustion, tangled limbs, or apathy.
Namjoon scrolls through a couple of movies before settling on a title with lots of cars and noise.
The movie starts. Fast and Furious blares through the speakers, startling you slightly. One of those fancy, high-paced car movies. Despite the blasting of stuttering ignitions and roaring of top speed chases, you quickly find yourself drifting off, wrapped in the warmth of Hobi’s embrace.
A particularly loud car engine roars through the speaker and you startle awake.
Jungkook is stretched out lazily, one leg on the sofa, the other leg on the floor. As your eyes trail down his body — collarbone peeking out from his far too large t-shirt, forearms somehow still perfectly defined — you gasp softly when you see what’s tenting in his pants.
Fuck.
He has a boner. Between the thick spread of his thighs, the outline of his more than girthy cock presses up against the fabric of the grey sweatpants. He has a boner from a car chase.
He seems unbothered, unaware, even. You, however, are anything but.
Involuntarily, your mouth begins to water. The shock of seeing him like this reels through you. All you can think of is what it would be like to lean forward just enough, hands sliding up the hard muscle of his tights until your fingertips reached the elastic band of his waist. You wanted to dip your fingers underneath, wrap your hand around the thick girth of him, and lower your lips perfectly around the pink head. You want to sit on that cock, feel the way he fills you up and stretches you so—-
Jungkook catches your gaze. Heat rises to your face, a mix of embarrassment and arousal. As he takes you in, he smiles a little bit and lets his hand tral down his torso to fiddle with the band of his sweatpants.
Fuck.
You can’t be here. Can’t be imagining these kinds of things. Before you can think of what you’re doing, you’re rolling off of Hobi, a sound of question resonating from his chest.
“I’ll be right back,” you mumble, tripping out of the living room and around the corner to the kitchen.
What the actual fuck. What is wrong with you?
You can’t stop the images that flood your mind. Jungkook, towering above you, while you kneel at his feet, cock framed so perfected by your pouted lips.
All you want is to slip underneath the thick duvet of your bed and press the soft silicon head of your vibrator against your clit, working away at the unbearable tension that has built within you until you come. That’s not an option though, as you know tonight you’ll be climbing into bed with Hobi and the glee you first felt when being paired with your favorite cuddle buddy is now entirely by your frustration.
Head spinning, you grab your phone and begin to type into an empty message box.
This dude has a fucking boner, and all I can think of is stuffing it down my fucking THROAT.
What? Who are you going to text that to? Not Hobi, that’s for sure. And you’re sure your friends back home will simply shake their head at your message and respond with a series of question marks.
You shake your phone to delete the message and set it down on the counter. Turning your back, you head to the sink to pour yourself a big glass of water. Maybe some damn hydration will do something to quench this thirsty ass bitch, you think.
The water helps a little, and you gulp it down greedily.
Still, it's as if the image of Jungkook’s fat cock has been burned in the back of your mind.
You sigh and put the glass back down by the sink, looking out the bay window that sprawls over the counter.
You’ve never seen darkness quite like this. Without the lights of the city and with a new moon singing in the sky it seems as if the only light in your little world is that which shines from the house. All that you can really see is the vague silhouette of the mountains surrounding you and your own reflection. God, if only Jungkook were behind you, ramming into you at his own pleasure while you watched the reflection of him chasing his orgasm—
“Who’s cock are you wanting to shove down your throat?”
You freeze, hands curling into fists on the countertop.
“What?” you barely manage to breathe. Slowly, you turn.
Jungkook is standing at the entrance to the kitchen, your still-lit phone sitting on the countertop.
Without considering what you’re doing, your eyes flicker down to the still-prominent bulge in his pants. The gaze lasts only a moment. Half a second tops. It’s long enough to notice the way he strains so deliciously against the soft grey fabric of his sweatpants, the head of his cock clearly outlined against the material. And it’s also long enough for Jungkook to catch exactly where you’re looking.
“Wh— oh.” His lips purse perfectly around the vowel, understanding dawning.
Your mind chugs at hyperspeed, clunking through no reasonable explanation to offer a Jungkook who just very clearly caught you checking his dick out — the same dick you were just about to send a very steamy text about.
“I—” Your voice trails off into nothingness as you grip even tighter to the counter behind you. What is there to say?
“You?” Jungkook raises an eyebrow and takes a step towards you, a smirk playing on his features. “Hm?” His voice has dropped, resonating deep through you, any trace of questioning erased from his tone. “You saw my cock and the first thing you think is to text your friends about how you want to stuff it down your throat?”
“No?”
“So it was a joke then?”
“No, no!” You begin to say Not a joke, I wouldn’t joke about that — but you stop yourself before the damning words can slip your mouth.
He tilts his head to the side, just a bit, and comes to lean against the island, several feet away from you. You can’t help but suck in a deep breath at the divine swirl of playfulness and danger in his gaze. He notes your tight grip on the counter, knuckles turning white.
“I’m not mad at you. A little surprised. Pleasantly so.”
“Pleasantly?”
“It’s a pretty little compliment to have someone you like wanna suck your dick.”
Your eyes widen. “Like?”
He speaks your name slow with a hint of boredom in his voice. “Seriously?”
“Seriously what?”
Jungkook smiles softly at you. “Sometimes you can be so blind.”
“I am not blind,” you huff, crossing your arms over each other.
“For certain things,” he smirks, “It seems you can see just just fine.”
He steps closer to you.
“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean — I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, I —”
“I’m not uncomfortable in the slightest.”
“You’re not?”
You look up at him. There’s something dark, deep swirling in his gaze, and that playful smirk you know all too well dancing in the corner of his lips.
“I just want to know why.”
“I mean—” He raises his eyebrow at you. “It’s been a really long and lonely time in quarantine. Can you blame me?” Rather than bringing closure to the situation, every word you speak only seems to heighten your anxiousness, your speech speeding up, words falling over one another. “Y’all are so fucking hot and I forgot! I forgot, okay! I forgot how to regulate my goddamn libido and my thoughts and forgot what it’s like to be fuc—”
You slap you hand over your mouth.
“You forgot what it’s like to be fucked?” Jungkook laughs.
You pout a little. “Don’t laugh at me!”
“I’m not laughing,” he chortles. He is laughing. “I’m just—” he takes a deep breath to steady himself. “--just thinking that I know exactly what you mean and I — you know,”  His hand glides up his chest to rub at his collar bone. His signature nervous tick. He’s still laughing, only nervously now. “You know. You know?”
“What?”
He takes a deep breath. Closes his eyes for a moment. You watch as his chest rises, falls, eyelashes fluttering open again. Suddenly he’s leaning in, both hands on either side of you.
“If it’s a lie—”
“If what’s a lie?”
His nervousness is quickly replaced with the playful smirk you’re so familiar with. “Did you mean it when it was a joke or when you said you wanted to — what was it? — stuff your throat with my cock?”
You gulp.
Now or never, babe.
Quickly, before you can doubt it, you nod.
He grins.
“I have a proposition then.”
“First Hobi, now you?”
“What? What did Hobi say?”
“Nothing — forget it.”
“Okay…” His brow furrows.
“Forget it,” you repeat.
The two of you stare at each other for a moment, reading each other’s gaze, trying to calculate exactly what the next step is. Surprisingly, you’re the first one to act, reaching out until your fingertips find the soft cotton of his t-shirt. You twist your fingers into it, not pulling him towards you by any means, but still, pushing him on.
“Proposition me,” you say, the nervousness gone from your voice.
His brows shoot up in surprise, but your gentle touch and the confidence in your voice seems to spur him onwards. “Well,” he starts slowly. “Considering you’re half the reason I’m even in this position—” He steps forward, just enough that you can feel his hardness press into your belly. He puts both hands on the counter on either side of you and leans into you. “I say we just sort this out here and now.”
“What are you saying?” you tease, twisting the fabric of his shirt into your hand, pulling him closer.
“I’m saying, let me fuck you.”
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Yes.”
“Yes.” He’s so close that when he speaks, his breath brushes against your lips. “Are you going to let me kiss you?”
“Mhmm,” you hum against him.
He dives in like a starving man, lips pressing hard against yours. His hands begin on your side and slide around to press into your lower, back, pressing you tightly against him.
“Here?”
“Why not?”
You grin.
Your hands begin to trail down his torso, fingers tracing the outline of his abs, which, you think in passing, are far too defined to be real after six months of quarantine without gym access. You reach the band of his sweatpants and don’t hesitate to dip underneath.
Fingers trace over bare skin and you’re surprised to find — he’s not wearing any boxers at all. Your heart rate picks up as you realize he’s been walking around all evening, cock hanging free beneath nothing but a thin layer of grey sweatpants.
Just by pulling slightly at the band of his sweatpants, the head of his cock pokes up, caught between the fabric and his torso. With a wink, you push Jungkook back just enough so that he steps back a couple of paces, moving until his back hits the wall.
“Can I touch you?” you ask sweetly.
He nods, furiously. Reaching down to wrap your fingers delicately around his length, your eyes widen as you realize just how large he is.
Your hand barely even wraps around the girth of him.
His eyes flutter as your grip tightens around him.
“Shit,” he breathes.
Ever so slowly, ever so lightly you begin to stroke up and down the silky skin of his shaft. You watch as pleasure flickers across his face — always transparent, always easy to read. You’d always admired that about him, how he wore his emotions for the world to see. But getting to see the pleasure you caused, you created, worn on his delicate features is nothing like anything you’d ever experienced before.
With a slight twist of your wrist, you have him exhaling sharply.
“Jesus fucking christ, it’s a whole new world with someone else’s hand.”
You begin to drop to your knees, wanting to take him into your mouth. But he’s quick to stop you, hands coming to grip your elbow.  
“Fuck,” he hisses. “It’s been too long— if you keep going like that I’m not going to last very long.” He pulls you back up towards him.
You frown at him, almost comically.
“I promise you’ll have another opportunity to suck my dick,” he chuckles, reaching up to pinch your chin. “That is, if you want to do this again.” He presses his lips to yours and your frown is quickly disappearing as he now takes his turn to trail a hand down from your chin. You shiver as he skates around your chest, as he brushes up against your hardened nipples, protruding through your worn-out sleep shirt.
“Stop teasing me,” you whisper, and he grins at you.
“Am I moving too slow?”
“Torturously sl—” Your speech is cut off as he takes a clothed nipple between his fingers and twists, just enough. Your back arches into his touch, and before you know what’s happening, he’s slipping an arm around your lower back and twirling you around so that suddenly it’s you against the cold marble of the island, Jungkook pressing into you.
He kisses you furiously, lips moving against yours as if he’s searching for something.
“What about the others?” you whisper against him.
“What about them?” Jungkook’s hand traces down your torso and comes to tease the band of your sleep shorts. He looks at you, brow raised — a question of permission. You nod, bring your hand down atop his, and guide it underneath your shorts. “I asked you a question,” he says, as his fingers finally dip into your wetness. He slides one finger along your folds. The touch is delicate but the shock of the sensation has you arching into him.
“More, please,” you gasp.
He circles your entrance with a firm touch, before slipping one finger into you. You do your best not to wantonly grind down onto his hand, but you can’t help your hips as they buck up into him when he curls his finger. It’s still not enough though.
“I asked you a question.”
“Kook— please.”
“Answer and I’ll give you exactly what you want. What about the others?” Your mouth gapes open as he adds a second finger and hooks them both against that delicious soft spot within you, so he continues for you. “Do you want them to know I have you underneath me like this? Hm? Do you want them to see you so fucked out with the smallest amount of touch?”
You whimper at his words, but manage to speak, “Right now, just want you.”
He grins. Leans close, right up against your ear and whispers:
“Then why don’t you do your best and stay quiet like a good girl?”
Your mouth drops open at the term of endearment just in time for him to begin thrusting his fingers in and out of you. You bite down on your lip to stop the squeal that threatens to break loose from you.
“God you look perfect,” he whispers. “You fall apart so easily.”
“Mmf,” is all you manage to get out.
And then, all of a sudden, his fingers are ripped out of you and all you feel is empty, sensation lost, the trails of pleasure disappearing as fast as sand through the gaps in your fingers.
“Jungko—”
He silences you by crushing his lips against you. His arms come to wrap around your back and he presses you tight against him. You can feel his erection against your lower belly and you can’t help but push back against it. He groans into your mouth.
“I need you,” he groans.
“Please,” you speak against his lips.
“Yeah?” he kisses the corner of your mouth before kissing and biting down your chin and onto your neck. He keeps one hand at your lower back, keeping you as close to him as he can, the other, coming down to cup your now dripping sleep shorts. He ruts against you, erection pressing lightly into your stomach. “Does this pretty pussy want my cock?”
“God, yes.”
“I need to fuck you. And I need you to stay very quiet so that the others don’t walk in here while my cock is inside of you.” He pulls away from you just enough grap your ass, lifting you onto the island counter. His strength is surprising, but you don’t mind being a little manhandled.
He pulls your sleep shorts to the side, grips his cock, and presses the head to your entrance. You try to slide forward on the counter, try to hook your leg around his back so as to press him into you, but instead he just stays there.
“What a needy little one,” Jungkook growls. And with that, he finally presses into you, his eyes so carefully trained on your every expression.
The smallest of ohs slips from you as he finally bottoms out.
“Fuck, you sound so sweet on my cock.”
You didn’t think that you would break your quarantine chastity in a mountain chalet kitchen with your friend’s cock stuffed deep inside you. You wouldn’t have imagined it would have been Jungkook either — that’s not to say you hadn’t imagined it.
But looking at him, his eyes closed in satisfaction as he finally takes his pleasure — this is all you want.
Throwing your leg around his lower back, you push him further into you. He lets his head fall onto your shoulder, breathing the slightest of groans into your skin.
You continue like that, moving desperately against each other, frantically searching for the pleasure that has been missing for so many months.
And then he’s pulling out of you, lifting you oh-so lightly off of the counter and turning you around. With a hand pressing down on your lower back, your back arches deliciously, ass presented just for him.
He grips his cock tightly in his hand, and runs the head of it through your folds. He presses against your clit and you suck in a breath as he begins to tease you. In response, you roll your hips back at him and he hisses, gripping your hip even tighter.
Finally, he nudges the head of his cock at your entrance and pushes in.
It starts to slip out of you before you can stop it. A long whine, high pitched and needy.
“Shh, baby,” he whispers in your ear. “Do you really want them to hear?”
Still, you can’t help the little huff that slips from you when he drags his cock out of you oh so dangerously slow and then rams back in.
Each thrust pushes you up against the kitchen counter. The rounded pressure, though a little painful, only sparkes a deeper desire in your belly.
“Fuck, Jungkook,” you whisper.
The rest of the boys are still in the other room, the movie playing not quite loud enough, filling the space of the previously lazy Friday night.
And then he slows. Just enough that he can roll his hips into you at a torturously controlled pace, his cock reaching deeper, more sensitive areas than before.
As if he know what you’re going to do, he wraps his hand around your mouth, stopping your moan in its tracks.
“Do you really want them to know just how desperate you are for cock?” You can hear the smirk in his voice. His hand is so big it covers almost half your face. You imagine his tattoos covering you. This is exactly how you’d like to wear him, his cock deep inside you, his tattoos on beautiful display. “Because tonight, you’re just mine.”
Using the hand he has around your mouth and the other one he has pressed against your belly as leverage, he fucks up into you, hard and fast. The pace is punishing, and exactly what you need.
And just as you feel the pleasure building in your belly begin to climb, dangerously hot and searing you hear:
“What the fuck.”
There’s a figure standing in the doorway, mouth gaping.
Jungkook freezes. Doesn’t withdraw though, his cock still stuffed deep inside you.
“I—” You begin to speak but he raises his hands and you stop dead in your tracks, not sure what you would say anyways.
“By all means, please — don’t let me stop you,” Jimin says.  
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bailey6too6bailey · 2 months
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"Holey Sh¡t"
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Bailey Jay
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