#im going in circles with my venting here ugh. i dont know what to do and i dont know how im going to keep going | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

oh-for-fic-sake · 4 years

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Dress Codes,Nooky And Cock Blocks

Masterlist

Henry tries to be a white knight and realizes Kal is to smart for his own good.

Request/Prompt: Henry and Kal meets you from work after having a bad day. Playing with Kal to make Henry jealous. Shutting kal out for some nooky but Kal sits outside the door barking and howling.

Warnings: Smutty Almost Smut! Fluff, Swearing

A/N: so this has combined two ideas one of which is from the lovely @being-worthy This was going to be a Pooh bear chapter two but hasn't quite fit the bill. Anyway I hope you all enjoy. P.S I 100% belive Kal would be a little shit!!!

Taglist: @two-unbeatable-beaters @thatgirly81 @angelofthorr @iloveyouyen @sofiebstar @thefangirlsblog @harrysthiccthighss @loserrlauraa @tumblrnewby @isitmine @tinabean37

This was a fucking piss take your manager was an asshole! You huffed about the office still trying to process the stupidity he just fucking spouted at you. You moved to the ladies room phone in hand ready to vent locking yourself in a stall fingers poised to rant in a long ass text message but you froze. Henry was home well at the gym to be more specific. He was over the moon having just snagged the role of Geralt of Rivia and had been working tirelessly on bulking up for the role especially now that he was getting the dates for shooting. You paused taking a deep breath. No. You cant vent to him and ruined his day to. You growled and moved leaving the bathroom slamming the door thankful that you only had another hour, at least the prick had the decency to wait until the end of the day.

You through your phone down into the bag sitting at your desk for a few moments. You cast your eyes over the computer screen seeing the little bimbo...His little bimbo Stacey there was an office romance between your asshat of a manager and this little blonde. She ran about the office in small tight skirts hair immaculate and thick makeup smeared across her face and fuck me glasses that were an accessory not prescription like yours. She had a snug fitted blouse and pencil skirt on flitting about the office in some dangerous looking heels. More feminine? Was you supposed to jump up and say 'yes sir of course Sir, anything to keep this job sir' then flutter your lashes at him?.

Fuck that, and fuck this be more feminine bullshit, there was no written dress code and as far as things had gone you were doing your job pretty damn well and you didn't need heels to do it!

You scowled seeing the blonde slip out followed by your manager it mus be time fore their discrete get away a make out in the copier room...How original. You sighed clicking your mouse scanning through the next lot of appointments...No more today but there was a shit tonne tomorrow. You sighed getting down...Was your job really on the line over skirts, makeup and heels? Sure you were on probation but they couldn't sack you for breaking a non existent dress code...Could they.honestly you wouldn't put it past Dave he seemed to have some fucked up traditional views.

Your attention was quickly drawn down to your phone buzzing you smiled seeing it was Henry quickly tapping the notification.

'Bbe you still at the office?? Miss you! 😘😘' You smiled softly heaving a deep breath then began typing.

'Yep still here not for long though finish in 1hr thank god 😘😘 u 2 at the gym still??' You sent the text and got a reply pretty quick you smiled he must have left the gym to reply so quick. Your thoughts wandered a daydream of the huge glorious man puffed out and sweaty ugh yes that's what you needed right now your man to just ruin you fuck the stress and doubt right out of you!. Your eyes scanned the new text he had sent pulljng you out of your raunchy thoughts.

'No just left walking Kal around the park he got a bit excited need to wear him out, so have a good day?'

'😂 good luck with that. And its been okay...G2g shopping after apparently I need to dress more feminine😒😒 so will be home late' You frowned hearing the two love birds enter the office again wrapped up around one another professionally you rolled your eyes as the blonde pulled away from your manager giggling and made her way to the computer opposite you instantly reaching for her compact mirror trying to correct the smeared lipstick across her face. Your phone pinged and you looked down face lighting up a little seeing the anger emojis. Henry felt the same ass you.

'😡😡🤬WTF? wats tht sppsd 2 mean?' you cringed maybe you should have just kept your mouth shut but it was too late now you sighed trying to placate him.

'I need to wear skirts and shit...be an office bimbo no big deal🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ just get a few skirts thts all' you typed back his reply was immediate almost as if he'd been typing the same time as you. Wincing you prepared yourself for the worse, Henry was a very protective man and you knew he hated the whole gender roles thing.

'😡😡You dnt need makeup and shit!! ur gorgeous dnt u listen to that wanker!! Can't u leave early?? Say ur going shopping?? Just get out of there! please love dnt let this get 2 u!!🥺🥺 I love u, ur perfect!!😍😘😘😍' You grinned got flushing rereading the words a warmth in your chest. You knew that he meant every word. Stacey looked over with a smirk snapping the compact shut and pointed a false nail in your direction.

"Oh? Is that a blush? Who are you texting? Someone cute?" You flicked your eyes up to her you didn't have anything against her per say but you were different people, she was all Instagram, kardashians and trending and you were all gaming, books and cosy pajamas. You never really spoke to her if you could help it.

"Err yeah...My boyfriend" you admitted looking down seeing another text from him. Another round of compliments and reassuring words lit up your screen.

'I mean it bbe I know u! dnt beat urself up over it! Dont u let him get 2 u!😘😘' you smiled softly yes he did know you and he knew this had not only made you angry but also insecure. You thought you looked good at work you always made a point to look 'put together' but it wasn't enough?

"Ooo was that him again? You never told me you had a boyfriend! Is he new? How long have you been together? What does he do? Whats he saying!?" You gulped as she got up quickly scuttling around the desk as fast as she could in her heels and skirt.

"We've been together a few years...He's just asking me to leave early and catch diner with him but I don't think Dave would like that..." Stacey's face lit up and she beamed at you. She was happy to have something else to gossip about.

"Oh! that’s so sweet~ he wants to steal you away for dinner! You know I wish Dave would do that but he only really pays attention to me at work....So does this sweet mystery man have a name?" You looked up at her tilting your phone away a little so she didn't see Henry's on going threats of 'coming down there and teaching Dave some manners by ripping his tongue out his ass' you shook your head as you caught the ass end of a long text full of emojis...You sort of regret teaching him the meanings of them....Was that an eggplant in the middle?.

"Henry...His name is Henry and he's an actor" Stacey squealed cupping her face completely excited for some reason.

"Oh that's so cute! You know its always you shy ones that nab yourselves the boho guys...You know I always wanted to date the 'boho' type myself but never did, they were all to....Just not my type I like clean cut guys, you know ones who fill out a suit" You squinted what the fuck was she getting at? You schooled your features standing taller quickly and made your own little dig.

"Like Dave?" she flushed and nodded excitedly missing the whole sarcastic droll over your words. She clapped her hands completely missing the fact you were poking fun at the scrawny 'stud' sleazeball who Henry could easily snap over his thigh if he wanted to.

"Yes just like my Dave~! Ugh anyway do you have a pic...Come ooon! Let me see your man~" you sighed tilting your head to her...She was pretty harmless...And dippy so it shouldn't do any harm she didn't strike you as the type of person to watch Henry's movies so shouldn't recognize him. You nodded sweetly it was actually a little fun you rarely got to show off your man, most people who knew him knew you were dating. You twisted the phone eying the screen and froze seeing the last texts he sent you whilst you spoke to Stacey.

'Have you got out early??🧐🧐'

'Babe don't ignore me!😤😤 Is he still there!?😡'

'Woman you better answer me! Stop ignoring me bbe it wont help😤😤'

'Im serious y/n do I need to chat with him? Do you want me to help?🧐🧐'

'Look out the window'

"Oh hell no!" you huffed out under your breath then stood up scrabbling to the large office window Stacey followed you alarmed. You freaked and quickly opened the window poking your head out to scream at your sweet but very dappy boyfriend. As irritated as the texts were he didn't look it, well until you really looked he was tense and it wasn't just because Kal was puling excitedly.

"Oh my god?! HENRY?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!....GET OUT OF THE GOD DAMNED ROAD!!" lone behold when you looked down you saw Henry standing there with a huge bouquet of Roses and a bag you suspected held a box of chocolates, Kal was barking up at you spinning in circles and jumping up super excited almost dragging the huge man over in all the excitement. It would seem the walk was not enough to wear out the bear. Henry grinned up at you you heard Stacey from beside you gasp.

"Holy shit is that your boyfriend??" you turned to her and smiled smugly to her nodding then glanced back down to him seeing him quickly navigate the people bustling around the car park heading for the doors. You froze. You can't let him up here he sounded angry earlier...He'd kill Dave. You ran back to your desk quickly logging off the pc and snatching up your bag.

"Where do you think your going y/n?" Dave called after you you stopped seeing him there arms crossed giving you the filthiest look he could muster seeing your bag slung over your arm then there was the distinct buzzing of someone Henry at the door trying to be buzzed in. You pointed to the door opening our mouth to fake sickness or something but was interrupted.

"Oh Dave leave her alone...All the times she's here early let her go early for once, we don't need her anymore today and it means we get the office to ourselves for an hour~" your eyes bugged out as Stacey came to your aid fluttering her lashes to your manager. He heaved a sigh and nodded to the door in a 'get out of here' motion.

You smiled quickly darting out down the stairs to the ground floor seeing Henry standing there unimpressed finger holding the button down in one long irritating ring. You shook your head at him through the glass as he held the button.

You slapped the exit button opening the door and Henry tried darting past you into the building chest puffed shoulders ready to give your boss a piece of his mind but you caught the frightening man by his ridiculous bulging bicep. You spun with him digging your heels into the worn carpet.

"No no no! Henry no!" he carried on to the stairs dragging you with him passing you the roses and Kal's lead as the dog bounced around you both yipping like the over excited pup he was. Henry had hoped filling your hands would give him time to jump up a few steps out of your reach so he could have a chat with Dave about this whole misogynistic bullshit. Henry swore when you scampered behind him hooking your arms around his forearm and leant back, if he moved you'd drop like a rock and up the few steps as you both were, you'd hurt yourself. He stopped heaving a deep sigh looking to you.

"Just five minuet's babe is all I need! fucking feminine my ass he just wants to oogle your peach of an ass!! And that's not- that ass is mine!! fucking no one NO ONE fucking upsets my baby!" Your body flushed skin prickling at the shear alpha tone the possessive growl that seeped into his words made you tremble swallowing dryly you managed to shake it off and focused on the task at hand fucking could come later for now you needed to stop him from ripping your manager a new one. You moved crouching down bearing your weight down giggling at him as he still tried to thunder up the stairs. Kal helped to pulling at his lead it was a joint effort.

"Henn love?! I'll be sacked if you go up there and make Dave piss himself! Please lets just go home it's Friday I can find a few things over the week end for now can we please leave" he stopped and looked up to the brown ceiling and flickering light sigh he clicked his tongue then looked to you slowly with a heavy breath.

"....Fine, but next time I'm having him!" you smiled finding his protective side arousing your tummy clenching just knowing you big strong man could rinse the little twat upstairs made your pussy clench you always had a thing about strong men and Henry was the most physically fit you'd ever met. You somehow managed to coax him out of the door in the direction of home taking a detour picking up a Chinese on the way.

You giggled rolling around the floor with Kal. after a quiet dinner and snuggle with Henry you had been ushered away so he could do his nightly reading of his new script.You didn't mind at all you loved seeing him so invested in his roles. you caught a glimpse of the red roses sitting proudly in a glass vase on the fireplace almost blocking the view of the tv but not quite. You loved this, just being home with your favorite boys enjoy a nice quiet night in. you scoffed mocking kal who was pulling hard on the black rope trying to out witt you with quick flicks of his head, playing tug with Kal was a workout huge as he was he had the weight and strength to out match even Henry. You did not stand a chance just holding onto the black rope hoping to slow him down but he was full of energy today.

Henry was sitting on the sofa feet up reading his witcher script pen in hand as he read his page, one a night was the deal. But honestly trying to pull him away from this particular script was a hell of a job fair enough he was trying to memorize lines and scribble down alternatives in the margins. It was sweet how excited he got, he already knew the character in and out so could already tweak things around so it felt like Geralt. He was happy had been chasing the role for a while so you didn't mind that preparing for it was taking up most of his time. but you were still horny from earlier and wouldn't complain to a night of nooky. But alas Henry was drawn in by the script and you were trying to find other ways to distract yourself from the bubbling arousal in your loins, like playing with Kal. But that’s not to say you wasn't going to tease your man, there were ways to get his attention~

You smirked putting a plan into action bending lower wriggling your ass, craning back so your shorts rode up just that little bit more. Then once in place you squealed loud gaining the mans attention as Kal tugged dragging you across the floor growling playfully bouncing his weight back jerking you around, it was only then that Henry grunted in annoyance, your voice had been high he loved you keeping Kal entertained he really did, but sometimes he needed a little quiet. Especially when he was trying to concentrate.

"You know if I keep this up I'll have bigger muscles then you~" you giggled out a you tried to hold your own against the mighty bear. Henry smiled and watched shaking his head as Kal dragged you under his legs to the free space on the side of the coffee table. As much as he was trying to concentrate you could never get on his nerves for long, he just loved you to damn much. Henry frowned as you were pulled again wincing anticipating an accident as Kal was definitely getting to invested in the game.

"Or a dislocated shoulder" he commented as Kal did another particularly painful looking shunt and shook his head side to side still growling loud around the toy. It was then that he looked at you properly and what he saw made the man pause and suck in a breath air getting trapped in his throat at the innocently erotic sight. Seeing you bent over any time was a pleasure but here and now? Bouncing deliciously on your knees being half dragged about the living room added another dimension to the whole thing. Your arms and back stretched out low on the floor spine arched slightly, sitting with your knees tucked under you, the bouncing making your ass jump deliciously.

Two full ass cheeks peeking out of you short shorts as Kal carried on his jerky movements. You bit your lip grunting and tugged back pulling with all your might successfully gaining a few inches which Kal stole back and more making you yelp and moan as you were sprawled out on the carpet again. This time dragged up on your knees into a position he he spent many nights enjoying to his fullest. were you doing this on purpose? he wouldn't put it past you...Maybe you needed a fuck, a proper fuck.

Henry couldn't help the twitching in his groin, the first tremors as he got a front row seat to the two perfect globes of your ass seemingly clapping against one another with the shorts acting like a thong shucked up your ass. Fuck you wasn't wearing Knickers again. Little fucking minx. He lowered his feet to the floor now far to invested in watching you roll around in the tiny shorts. swept up in the way your body swayed taunting him. you turned to him with a sly smile and sent him a quick wink that he almost missed.

He gaped at you, you were doing it on purpose!! His script laid completely forgotten on his lap as he watched you turn back to Kal innocently dipping down low again shoulders to the floor stretched out taught in front of you face tucked into your arm as Kal fought you for the coveted rope. God...It had been a while since he fucked you like that. He licked his lips. Too long in the busy days since snagging the witcher role he had only had time for a two quickies. Two fumbled quickies in three weeks and they wasn't even that good. Well not his usual hour long foreplay teasing and touching then good few rounds. They were just a flurry of fast rutting motion's, less fucking more jerking trying to finish as quickly as you could just wanting that high. he bit his lip watching you watch him out of the corner of your eye definitely teasing him.

"Babe come here~" You froze and twisted your head back you knew that tone.Grinning knowing you'd got your way you looked seeing Henry eyeing you hungrily biting his lip tilting his head, legs spread wide making his thighs bulge in what should be a loose set of black shorts but actually became skin tight on this Goliath of a man. You flushed under the gaze but managed to hold into the rope not giving the still pulling pup an inch. His eyes were a dark ocean blue pupils nearly swallowing the color completely, you wondered how far you could push him. you pouted at him before teasing him further opening your legs wider letting the material of your shorts almost completely disappear.

"Henry...I'm playing with Kal-" he squinted at you then quirked a brow before shaking his head snapping shut the folder holding the script and let it drop to the floor by his foot with a decisive thump. You gulped. But didn't move instead you heaved back pulling the Akita across the floor.

"Babe...Come here Kal's had his playtime..." you rolled your eyes hearing the silent 'now I want mine' sometimes he was a man child. You twisted your head to him with a flutter of your lashes and cheeky grin.

"Well I'm playing with Kal you have to wait your turn-HEY? HENRY THAT’S CHEATING!?" You yelped as Henry quickly bolted up right and stomped on the rope whilst using his considerable size and strength to pull you up off the floor making you release the toy.

"Well that’s enough playing with Kal, time to play with me. I wont be cock blocked in my own house by the dog~" you giggled as Henry quickly began climbing the stairs laughing kicking your feet, watching as Kal stayed two steps behind rope in his mouth excitedly following his parents, you were all going to play!. It was only when the dog found himself shut out of the bedroom did he realize you were in fact not going to be playing with him anymore tonight. you could hear the indignant huff through the door.

You wriggled as Henry fell onto the bed with you wrapped around him slowly devouring each other with deep kisses tongues and teeth roaming each other. It had been a good few weeks since you both explored one another properly. Henry pulled away chuckling at the soft scratches at the door. Kal was not impressed.

"Kal go lie down! We will be finished soon" Henry called out and ignored the high whines and more insistent scratching at the door and leaned over you sucking at your neck decorating it as he saw fit leaving marks of red and purple biting his mark into the crook of your neck then lower tracing a warm wet train over your thin shirt. You moaned clutching his waist trapping him between your thighs using the grip you had to rock up onto him trying to ease the burning in your core.

"Oh whats this? Someone is impatient considering she wanted to keep playing with Kal?" His voice came out as a deep rasp making you gasp cupping his face.

"You treating me with your Geralt babe?" He smiled latching onto your ear rocking down onto you drawing out soft mewls. You vaguely heard Kals whines become louder barks out side the door hearing the dog jump up pawing at the handle of the door trying to break in.

"Oh you like?~" You sighed quickly trying to rid your tshirt panting feeling just how wet your slit had got, you were embarrassingly wet considering you hadn't even done anything yet.

"Fuck yes~ oh god its so-ah fuck its so hot Henry~" he pulled back growling in the new low tone you hadn't known he was capable of, his large hands helped remove the tshirt throwing it across the room and latched onto your tits biting and sucking slow flicking his tongue across a pebbled nipple as his hands stripped you of your shorts. he chuckled seeing the damp patch, your arousal sticking to the material in one neat line.

"Oh you really do need me don't you love~" you nodded to him whining when he pulled back grunting a growl biting your boob and sucking harshly. You both moved in tandem rolling around the sheets grinding ,rocking ,biting and grunting both intent on ignoring the pup crying outside the door. He would wear himself out and get bored. Well that was the plan anyway.

Henry finally pinned you and descended on your core like a starving man given the sweetest fruit. You cried out fingers in his hair unsure what spurred on this heated frenzie but would happily indulge him. One thing you loved about him is he was always up for eating you out, the man thrived on it! He seemed to get a massive kick out of feasting on you until you came all over him. You grunted as he suckled on your bud teasing and twisting his supple lips across it Nipping you began to loose yourself panting and jerking up into his mouth chasing a sweet release you hadn't known you needed and then you heard it.

A deep loud echoing mournful howl. Even Henry stopped frowning up at you from between your legs. That was new, Kal wasn't a howly dog, he barked and yipped giving off the weirdest groans and moans. But never howled. You both burst out laughing unable to stop it as the howls were all over the place, loud and quiet raspy and uneven like Kal was an apprentice learning on the job.they were less 'howls' and more 'how-wo-wow-wo-wow' It was clear this was his first time but bless him he was trying to be the wolf of the house. You panicked as he began to get the hang of it and patted Henry's shoulder. he was still chuckling finding Kals new found voice hilarious.

"Quick stop him! If he learns that we'll never hear the end of it!" You chuckled pulling the thin sheet over you as Henry swore and quickly slinked off the bed racing to the door opening it stopping Kal in his tracks. The Akita smiled panted a few breaths thumped his tail on the floor then collected his rope entering, jumping on the bed without a care in the world.

"Babe?" You asked biting the inside of your cheek trying to stop the giggles as Henry began to scowl at the fluffy bear sprawling out on his side of the bed a flush building up his chest settling over his face. He cleared his throat.

You and Henry watched as Kal moved dropping the rope by your hand waiting for you to continue your game of tug. You flopped back in peels of laughter at Henry's face. The man looked amused and livid at the same time as realization struck. Kal, lovable cute baby boi Kal had just played Henry like a fiddle. You didn't know whether to laugh or cry at the fact your boyfriend, your chosen mate had just been outsmarted by a dog.

"Yes love?" He said none to happy with how things had turned out, here he was standing at the foot of his bed painful hard on and there you were naked and willing...In his bed...With Kal. This was not the plan.

"I hate to break it to you...But you've just been cock blocked in your own house by your dog....For a game of tug!" You giggled as you threw Henry's previous words back at him petting Kal who was still fiddling with the rope trying to make you grab it.

"No shit...Can we still fuck? I mean he can have my side! I'm gonna be on top of you anyway?" You gaped at him as he rounded the bed fulling intent on rolling on top of you sliding home. You held up your hand to him.

"Nope! No way am I fucking you next to Kal!" Henry ignored you crouching over you trying to lay you back down to finish what he started before being rudely interrupted by the Akita now in bed with his girlfriend.

"Oh babe why not? this is painful, look I'm going purple...Besides you started it its your responsibility~" he whined trying to bat away your pushing hands leaning in to capture you with a burning kiss. You dodged anticipating his next move, his kisses were always a sure fire way to make you completely melt and give in to him. you quickly twisted away throwing your legs over the side of the bed placing your hands either side of his naked hips, pressing him back as he still tried to gain on you. you swallowed looking up at him meeting his lopsided grin, trying to ignore the proud cock swaying in front of you almost tapping your heaving breasts.

"How about the shower? He's scared of the bathroom since his last bath?" Henry snapped his fingers and clapped face lighting up as he patted your hands slowly easing them off of him.

"Fuck yes! Babe you are a genius!" He moved over and kissed your face making you bat him away and then he turned to Kal wagging a finger at him.

"And you my four legged son are a pain in the ass!" You shook your head patting Kal as he tilted his head he looked offended with his dads statement. You looked to the bathroom door as Henry's pert ass vanished around the door frame.

"Daddy didn't mean it baby boy~ you know how he is when he doesn't get his way...Just a spoiled man child~ he loves you really" Kal whined ears flattening as he heard the shower switch on. You patted the dog with a sigh and got up padding across the bedroom to the en suit.

"Don't worry baby you stay there and daddy wont get you in the mean old shower~" you giggled scratching his ears as he huffed in defeat. His daddy had got the better of him and the Akita wasn't pleased. He grumbled as Henry poked his head around the door frame wriggling his brows at you as you passed him getting a playful smack on the rear. then he faced the dog and stuck his tongue out childishly to the dog who huffed and turned around choosing to give you both a clear view of his ass.

#henry cavill fic #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill imagine #henry cavill smut #henry cavill #henry cavill x y/n #henry cavill fluff #kal cavill

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survivor-switzerland · 7 years

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EPISODE 5: BACKSTABBING ME BEHIND MY BACK - ABEL

ok so if we lose this next immunity challenge i kinda want brett out. he's a huge fucking threat that needs to go. i don't trust anyone enough on this tribe to make that move happen but im also pretty sure he has an idol because of the tasks challenge. i know that someone on that tribe has an idol so. guess we'll see.

max needs to go. he's rubbing me the wrong way and tried to tell me i didn't need to study for my exams and implied i can do the challenge? bitch don't fucking tell me what i can and can't do. i sure as hell CAN and WILL vote your ass out.

Yeah so Trent goes with 5 votes for him and 3 votes for (QUEEN) Renee..

I'm happy that the OG Monte Rosa members did not lose a number during the tribal and now Luke comes in to the Monte Rosa. Putting back the OG tribe ratio back to 4v4.

I wanna know how these last two votes went so bad! Both of them had been 5 - 3. I wanna know who got C'iere out because I wanted to work with him SO bad! And there's this vote where it was 5 - 3 again... What a time to not have a third eye or whatever.

Anyway I've been bonding with Ashley Sarah and before the vote she told me that Logan is friends with Daisy and stuff. Hmm Logan is becoming a bit dangerous for my taste, I'm still weary on that alliance that Tyler suspects of Logan, Nick and Dom. I need to continue spreading my network of information because if that tight alliance of three is legit they're dangerous!! But I'm gonna continue and be the friendly person I am because that is the foundation of my mad social skillz!!

This current tribe is the purrfect (oops) time to solidify something with Ash and Brett! Me and Tyler need to rally our own army if we're going to go against Nick and Logan's.

Now in my previous confessional I mentioned how I wanted to work with Zack, but now... I kinda don't wanna?? Idk after composing myself a little I feel frightened by him plus he turned his status on skype to "away" just because I talk to much? asdfghjk buddy if you wanna stop talking then come up with a lie, jeez that's what I would do. So right now I've just been quiet today since I've gotten self-conscious lol.

So we're doing a music video and I'm quite excited on how this turn out. The song were doing is something from Eurovision which I don't know what that is but I just went along because I've got nothing better to suggest, unless if this tribe was packed with otaku's I'd probably go at it. One last note, I'm going to the beach for 4 days tomorrow so wohoo for me!!

Ciao!

I'm now on the Monte Rosa tribe! Since coming back from Exile Island a few people have asked me "what happened" which is code for "did you find an idol?" and like...I don't think these people realise that the idol clues are literally relevant to the challenges HOW am I supposed to have gotten an idol when I couldn't do the challenge on Exile. It makes me laugh that these people apparently don't realise that but oh well. This tribe is pretty cool, I feel well connected so hopefully it goes well for me. Daisy spilled her guts to me about how Logan betrayed her at the last vote and lied to her so I know I have Daisy in my pocket again. Logan and Nick are obviously working together but Logan would more than likely choose me over Nick so I'm cool with that. Renee doesn't really speak to anybody but I know that Zack would expect me to look out for her so I'm going to do that as best as I can. Zack and Renee will be trouble if they meet up again so it might be time to take Renee out sooner so I'm conflicted about what to do. I'm Abel's only friend so THAT'S fun, he trusts me a lot. Benjamin and Lily are from OG Monte Rosa but I think they'd work with me if push came to shove.

My Tatzelwurm and I are doing well, we love that we got a round to sit and do nothing but I need to survive 2 more rounds until it can hatch and help me win this game.

The dreaded music video comp ugh how I feel right about now

I'm super nervous about this tribal. I feel like there's another swap coming up after this round or the next one. I need to start talking to people more but like I have a gut feeling that people are going to want me out. If anything they should want out Tyler for not doing... anything.

ok so i talked to zack and he doesn't have an idol. or so he says. it'd be stupid to not tell me because im literally trying to save him. but i know that i need to keep my mouth shut because this is literally the same situation that happened last time. i really want to work with zack and jev but at the same time, I'm here to win. I'm trying to beat my old placement. God i hope we just fucking win this immunity challenge.

whew... I really hope our music video wins? I'm not entirely too confident in my position in the game at the moment, even if I do have some loyal allies. And plus, this kinda scenario was what killed me in Solomon, so I don't wanna deal with the same scenario again, but just slightly further into the game.

Here's what i was venting about sorry.

so Ashley sarah and I may flip to jev and zack

at least making it 4-4

but what might also happen is I might try to get the 6 monte rosa to split 3 and 3

by planting a seed of doubt by telling them zack or jev has an idol

or at least telling them that I think they do and by being safe by splitted 3-3

Ashley sarah and I would vote opposite ways

so for example

me brett and ian vote for jev

ashleysarah max and tyler vote for zack

But Ashley sarah and I don't actually vote for either of them, instead we vote for Max/Brett making the vote 4-2-2

but that would take a lot of work and convincing

Thank GOD we won that immunity challenge because I feel like I'd have been in trouble had we not won, so thank you Monte-Rosa for serving Valentina teas with your lip sync!!

tired

Daisy's fake ass pretending to talk game to me when she throws me under the bus to everyone here. Our conversations go nowhere bc she talks in circles and won't ever be straight up. Also her handwriting is ugly. Flop ass flop.

Ugh! This game man. I just can't wait until it's all done and I never have to talk to these people again!

Ok, so Abel, Renee, Logan, Ben, and myself blindsided Trent last round... I am really glad it worked because it hopefully means that we should have a majority going into this round. Immunity is this ugly ass music video challenge... so I record me doing the entire fucking excruciating lipsync and then Logan forgets to edit me in the video :( I am not gunna hold it against him because he def put a ton of work into editing but I was really made. Since I lied to Daisy and Lily last round I had to mend some bridges this round. I try and tell Daisy that Logan and I were looking out for her because it was either Trent or her. Also I really want to have those bonds, especially with Lily down the road... you never want somebody in the game who will never work with you. So we lose immunity AGAIN and end our asses back at tribal council :/ I think this should be a fairly simple vote because we can just vote out Daisy for being a crazy ass messy player who legit throws names out the wazoo whenever we lose an immunity competition. However, I have this sneaking feeling that somebody might be trying to pull a blindside TM tonight, maybe Luke? I just hope im not the target of get blindsided... I think i have been playing a very lowkey game upto now, not the traditional crazy antics of my other ORGs, sure I have generally good connections with all my tribe mates, but I dont think thats enough to land my torch in the snuffer for a couple of rounds. I think this game has bigger fish to fry before I get served with a side of tartar sauce.

The time is here. I finally get to face Daisy in the face. The one who's been backstabbing me behind my back. This ends tonight. With hopefully...her blood...on these hands.

Honestly I'm probably going home but if I don't I need to CHILL OUT. Too many people are coming to me for plans with votes and I'm not here for it. I don't want to be seen as someone calling the shots, regardless if I am or not.

WHEW I WAS LOOKING AT THE WIKI AND ORIGINAL MATTERHORN IS TRULY IN SOME HOT WATER. 4 of us have already gone home and tonight it's looking like a 5th may be leaving so AHHHHHHHHH I brought it up to Renee and she was shook so. Whew.

I've been approached with two different plans tonight. One plan is to vote out Daisy and the other is to vote out Abel. I think I'm leaning more toward where the numbers are tonight and voting out Daisy. It's great for my game because people think she has the advantage (teehee) and she's also paranoid and doesn't trust me 100% so.

I'm predicting the vote tonight to be:

Abel - Lily, Daisy

Daisy - Luke, Abel, Renee, Nick, Logan

and Benjamin is in a gray area right now because nobody knows what he wants to do. I'm hoping this goes right because I'd be 4/4 for voting in the majority and controlling the vote teehee

So we win immunity again woo!!

So I'm now in an alliance with Ashley, Tyler and Brett!! Woo my faves!! Right now we're trying to figure out if there's indeed a GIANT pre-made alliance in this game. Ugh pre-mades... Anyway we think that Logan is the one running it and he has his hands on Nick, Dom, Daisy, Lily and Luke. That's dangerous as hell and if there is a pre-made well it needs to be killed like right now!!

So it seems like tonight it's either me or Abel. Daisy vs. Abel: The Showdown! Basically, I thought I had my numbers for Abel. I had me, Luke, Nick, and Lily and all I needed was Logan or Ben to have that majority. Ben's not answering me, so I talk to Logan and tell him to just be honest with me and tell me whether he's voting with me or not. He says he doesn't know yet, but it might be me tonight and he thinks people are lying. Which means that he's now gonna try to figure out what the majority actually is, and he might vote with me he might not. Ben gets back to me and says he's heard Abel. And right now I'm confident about Lily voting with me, maybe Ben because it seems like he's been busy. But I'm nervous about Nick and Luke. Luke is trying to comfort me and reassure me everything will be fine, and I can't tell if this is similar to when he would reassure me when I was just being overly paranoid, or if this is similar to when he reassured me that Abel was going home pre swap. Also I've barely talked to Nick, and he totally lied to me last round. So he could easily be lying again. Apparently Renee is voting for Abel too? Which shocks because I was told that they're a pair. I don't know, maybe she's just trying to make sure she doesn't get votes again. Or maybe she's not actually voting for Abel. I have no idea. I'm just scared, and I feel like anything could happen tonight. I hate going into tribal feeling like I have no idea how the votes are gonna fall. It's nerve wracking.

EPISODE 5

Now Trent's gone. Great. Literally the only two people I was excited to play with have already been gunned down and I didn't get to share so much as a hello with them. It's rather depressing. I'm going to do everything in my power while I am in this game to avenge both Keegan and Trent. The good news is that with so many of original Matterhorn destroying one another, we are now up 10-6 and now I only have 6 people left on my kill list.

There has been a lot of speculation as to how original Matterhorn's hierarchy was. The first two votes were unanimous, but in the tribal council in which Ci'ere was voted out, three votes were cast against Abel. Ci'ere was the first, obviously, and I'm thinking at this point that Trent was the second--and likely the reason original Matterhorn didn't attempt to draw him in when they were swapped an even 4-4. Now it's just a matter of figuring out the third vote. Furthermore, there were three votes against Renee, leaving two players in the minority of last night's vote. Did all of original Monte Rosa and Renee vote out Trent? Or were there fractures among Monte Rosa's votes? There's a lot more uncertainty about where you actually stand in the game when you haven't attended a tribal council. I'm really curious how everything is going to unfold.

The challenge was uh...it was a god damn music video. Shoot me in the face. I immediately volunteered to sit out only to face the revelation that Luke was on Exile and had now joined the new Monte Rosa, so we were EVEN and I couldn't fucking sit out! After pushing host Amanda into a vat of monoxide, I relaxed and was able to focus on the win.

How Music Video Challenges USUALLY Go:

1. Literally everyone has different awful taste in music and pushes for something they like to be the song of choice.

2. No one agrees on anything.

3. No one wants to be the editor (and can you blame them?)

4. 7/8 people begrudgingly learn a song they don't care for and roll their eyes through their entire recordings.

5. Shitty de facto editor puts together a slapstick, shoddy video.

6. The judges brutalize.

How Music Video Challenges SHOULD Go:

1. First establish the editor. Without an editor, you don't have anything--this is the most important step to the entire thing and really should be the only thing considered at the beginning.

2. You let the editor pick whatever fucking song they want and you shut the fuck up about how much you hate it for the sake of unity and in gratitude that you're not stuck with editing said video.

3. You film your scenes enthusiastically.

4. The editor, who has gotten their way with song choice and everyone has treated with a modicum of respect, is passionate about editing said video and puts together something actually passable.

5. The judges only brutalize slightly.

I want the above steps to be circulated to literally everyone who will ever play Tumblr Survivor or any similarly formatted series because I feel like people don't understand this formula and will continue to make asshats of themselves because of it.

So Maximilian stepped up to be the editor and that was the first time since this game has started that I've ever appreciated Max. Max fucked up in the scavenger hunt. Max was useless in endurance tasks. Max has just been generally useless. So the fact that Max stepped up to be editor, a major key role in this challenge--all the respect in the world. I could not be more grateful to Max for this. Max chose a rather annoying song by a Swiss artist, but it was a good song choice because if you're like me and don't want to learn the words to an annoying song, there is a lot of instrumentation and whistling in Sebalter's "Hunter of Stars." I did find it funny that Max chose a song with chorus lyrics: "Want me to go 'cause you think I'm lying." It's not lost on me.

I told the team that it would be cute if we were to all wear red/white in coordination with the colors on Switzerland's flag. I don't recall how many of these goobers actually complied with that, but for me, I had a blast with it. I remembered that my Harley Quinn shirt that was a part of my Halloween costume is those colors and it struck me that it would be fun to dress as Harley and have the baseball bat as a prop. In my first take, I attempted to fake-hit my phone with the bat, but I actually ended up hitting it dead on and I bashed my own phone! It made for a very funny music video closer and an excellent gif, but that was not my intention! Zack made the gif and I love it so much. I told Zack, "You are my favorite Matterhorndog." The rest of the scenes went much easier and I used an umbrella and a pinata in addition to the baseball bat as props. The following day, I learned that Tyler Fennessy was unable to participate and I printed out his picture and shot another whistling scene while I was at work, in my suit, at my hotel's lakeside patio.

All in all, Max edited a really fantastic video and they killed their scenes as well--the lip synching and violin playing as on point. I think my scenes were great and Ian was a terrific dancer and lip syncher as well. It was a brilliant team effort.

Can we talk about Monte Rosa's video for a second? Yikes. Renee was so cute and animated and I feel like I would really like her personality--that is all of the positive critique I have on that video. The guys were all terrible. Lily was terrible. Daisy...she really needs to reconsider her lipstick. I've gotta say. She looked like an extra from Glee. Logan's interpretive dance was ridiculous, but he has a pretty smile. The whole thing was an utter mess. And I feel Logan's pain. Finding someone to edit the video SUCKS. And if Logan had been voted out, I would have been pissed on his behalf. As far as I'm concerned, if you step up to be editor, especially if it's because no one else can be bothered, you are IMMUNE from being voted out. The loss cannot be put on you. So points to Logan for actually doing things and points to Renee for being cute.

The original Monte Rosa members on New Matterhorn are now 5-0 in challenge wins. Ashley Sarah, Dom, Ian, Maximilian, Tyler, and myself have never had to attend a tribal council in the first five rounds of the game. It's kind of awesome, but not being involved in votes really makes it difficult to cement bonds. Tyler finally got around to pitching the idea of an alliance to Ashley Sarah and now we are an alliance of four with Ian rounding out the squad.

A few things were discussed in this new alliance of four, titled "H4rmony" (I hate the name, but I don't care):

1. Ian believes Lily was one of the two who didn't vote out Trent last round due to a voting confessional that looks like something Lily's said before.

2. Zack has allegedly told Ian and Tyler that he believes Ashley Sarah has a hidden immunity idol--it makes us believe that he is actually in possession of one. That and/or the huge advantage that came with throwing the endurance tasks challenge.

3. No one trust Logan.

4. We want to keep a line of communication open with Jevvon as a potential wild card.

5. According to Tyler, Zack claims Dom has approached him about having an alliance including Dom, Tyler, Zack, and Ashley Sarah.

6. Everyone seems to have something going on with someone except for Maximilian. Because of this, I volunteered to speak with them to see where their head is at.

So I went and talked to Maximilian and conversation literally could not have gone worse. Max was already someone I found it very difficult to talk to and this conversation just made that concrete. Conversing with this loser is EXCRUCIATING. It is so bad. Max has this air that asserts their intelligence is higher than others (but with no actual credentials to speak of). And they're just so standoffish that I left the whole conversation feeling super uncomfortable. My strategy in speaking to them was to start with pleasantries and then ease into how never losing a challenge has lulled me into a sense of security I shouldn't have and I've found it difficult approaching people because I've been warned about a massive pre-made that exists (that last part actually is the truth).

HIGHLIGHTS

Max: "I've gotten to a point with this community where shouting about premades is a surefire way to get me to vote you out the next round, to be honest."

Me: Yikes. Well you can write down whichever name you like, Max."

Max: Not threatening you. It's just the pattern I've developed."

LITERALLY WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT? Who fucking says that? Jesus Christ that was so uncomfortable. This asshat is non-committal and wants to just sit on their ass while this whole game happens around them. You do you, Max. But you know what's not good game? Not playing ball with someone attempting to play ball with you for no apparent reason. Zack might very well have an advantage or an idol to use if we lose the next challenge. I have a simple solution and Tyler agrees with me completely: play up that we are splitting the votes between Jevvon and Zack (3-3-2), forcing Zack's hand in using their advantage/idol, but actually voting out Maximilian, someone no one will be playing an idol on (4-2-2 or 4-2-1-1 or some variation of that). Even though I'm a Neda in nature, the Ika Wong can and will come out from time to time. And I'll take a shot at this guy when he least expects it. And I won't miss.

#ihopeiseeyounever #confessionals

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