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brownstonearmy · 3 years

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2021-02-06: A Stout Drinking Problem

Saturday August 22 (mid-morning)

After a few days, the party is waiting at an outdoor cafe for a certain someone to show up. Russell Stout had sent word to Q (who goes by Sparkle today) that he has some information on his father's shady business dealings and would like to meet. Finally a Stout is making good on their promises!

When Russell arrives, he's sporting a large bruise on his arm. It seems that the elder Stout has been drinking heavily lately and Russell was on the receiving end of a thrown bottle. There's some family drama happening there because Russell is apparently too much of a disappointment to be the proper heir to the Stout name. Spleenifer asks Sparkle for clarification about how they came to be entangled with the Stouts, and the short version is "corrupting the youth and all that." Fair enough.

But Sparkle didn't come here for a sob story about the numerous dysfunctions of a patriarchal tyrant, so let's get down to business! Russell mentions that his father has been investing a lot of money in a business that has been unable to fulfill its contractual obligations as of late. That business is the Brownstone Beverage Company, sole purveyor of Elvish wines and a popular earthy beer called Bitter Manure Sage Grass Juice. Normally the failure of a business to meet the its obligations would cause Lawrence "Copper-Pincher" Stout to re-evaluate his business decision, but Lawrence seems happy to keep throwing money at the problem.

Russell doesn't have all the pieces of the puzzle, but he did find some issues with entire shipments missing from the inventory. Beverage company + drunk dad + inventory shortages = HELLA SUSPICIOUS. But Russell is afraid that he can't ask any more questions about the situation without alerting Lawrence.

As the party readies for a jaunt to the Brownstone Beverage Company, Deputy Billy Dumont shows up. He's looking for Norm, but he's cagey about why. When pressed, Billy eventually mentions that he's little short on cash this week and was hoping he could borrow some money for rebuilding and other expenses. Spleenifer obliges Billy's request for charity and gives him 10 gold coins, one of which appears to have a partially-embedded tooth filling in it.

Lurking outside the beverage company is a face familiar to Spleenifer: it's Brodelicious (formerly Brolexander), a pyromancer who gave up a life of partying to convert to a sober life of worship according to Lathander's teachings. Brolexander pleads that he was in a moment of weakness and close to relapsing, but Spleenifer doesn't believe it. It seems like Brodelicious is there for a reason unrelated to sobriety, but she doesn't know why yet. She sends Brodelicious away from the building with a warning about the immorality of alcohol.

Lucky leads the way inside the building, as she knows Bartholomew, the owner. It turns out that Lucky accidentally teleported into one of Bartholomew's brewing vats when a wild magic surge happened during one of her magic exams. She was trying to turn newt and into a frog, but ended up as an accidentally intoxicated minor.

Once everyone gets to Bartholomew's office, the questions begin. Bartholomew's desk is cluttered with past-due notices and other unpleasant paperwork. This business that's been in the family for almost 400 years is on the verge of bankruptcy because Bartholomew got stuck with a particularly onerous contract with Stout Enterprises regarding the shipment of Elvish wine.

The last few caravans bringing the imported wine haven't arrived, and each time that happens, Bartholomew has to pay up. He has to refund the order (plus interest) or provide the same monetary value of other beverages. It stung the first time it happened, but it could be overcome. But now even more deliveries haven't arrived and he's on the edge of losing his business. Bartholomew asks the party to talk to the judge who approved the contract to see if there's any way for Bartholomew to get out of the contract.

And that's how the party ended up at the Dunlap and Perkins Law Office, rubbing elbows with the city's elite legal professionals. The party is find the person they're looking for, the Honorable Wiley Beauregard, Esquire; but they make the mistake of omitting his full title during the introduction. If professional honorifics must be used, then Spleenifer shall beat him at his own game.

She introduces herself as the Right and Honorable Spleeny Weeny of the Imperial Rebar Municipal Court. You probably haven't heard of it, since it's in a different district. But her years of religious devotion give Spleenifer enough of an aura of authority to at least seem plausible to the Honorable Wiley Beauregard, Esquire.

Wiley's eyes light up at the mention of a judge from a different district. He actually has a small situation that he'd like to discuss with this new judge from the Imperial Rebar Municipal Court. He welcomes them into his parlor, where drinks of Bitter Manure Sage Grass Juice are offered. It's not really Sparkle's thing, but Spleenifer guzzles hers.

This conversation is protected by judge-judge privilege, which is like a attorney-client privilege, but better. It seems that the Honorable Wiley Beauregard, Esquire is beginning to regret his cozy business relationship with Stout Enterprises. Lawrence Stout promised investment returns on a business venture in exchange for approving the Brownstone Beverage Company contract. But this isn't just any old sweetheart deal; Wiley claims to have letters sent by Lawrence Stout attempting to bribe his way into approving the contract.

But before any more juicy bits of gossip can come to light, the sound of a metal ball bearing rolling across the floor interrupts the conversation. There's a flash of magic as Wiley and the party find themselves in a zone of truth. Brodelicious and two other people (a dwarf with a shovel and a large human shaped like a refrigerator) appear and demand to know where the bribery letters are.

Wiley doesn't know, and that's the truth. He gave the letters to one of his servants to hide, so that just in case someone truth-bombed Wiley, he wouldn't divulge his secrets. And Wiley doesn't know exactly where his servant is right now, only that he sent him off to get some stuff from the Brownstone Beverage Company.

"Ugh, we just came from there!" laments Brodelicious.

Lucky stealthily casts invisibility on herself and creates a silent illusory version of Lucky to stay behind and nod and mirror emotions and generally pretend to be present in the room. Time to track down the servant before Brodelicious and his gang can find him first. Blind luck, give us strength!

Moments later, Brodelicious and co. burst out of the building in search of the servant. Spleenifer instructs the Honorable Wiley Beauregard, Esquire, to seek shelter in the sewers for the time being and make himself scarce while the party takes care of these miscreants.

Real-but-invisible Lucky picks up a possible trail for the servant and heads in that direction. She casts True Seeing in case there are secret doors or magical illusions afoot, and her hunch turns out to be a legitimate lead. Unfortunately, she arrives a moment too late.

A giant ape has grabbed Wiley's servant, while Brodelicious and his Dwarf companion are fleeing. Thanks to the True Seeing, Lucky knows the giant ape was the silent human companion in Brodelicious's squad. The ape was disguised to appear as a person. Wizard plans, my friends, are often kooky. Anyway, Lucky casts Thunder Step to save the servant from the ape's grasp.

Sparkle and Spleenifer hear the crack of thunder in the near distance. What are the chances that Lucky was behind that sound? By now you shouldn't even have to ask; it's all but guaranteed that it was Lucky!

The rest of the party arrives on scene as Lucky casts Seeming on herself and those nearby. Now the party looks like the servant. A handful of random townsfolk look like the servant. And the servant, well yeah, he looks like the servant, too.

Everybody scatters in the chaos.

Sparkle-Servant busts out the Didgeriboop on the Dwarf wizard, but misses. Spleenifer-Servant manages to trip Brodelicious with her quarterstaff. As Spleenifer-Servant unleashes a judgmental monologue about Brodelicious's numerous moral failings, Brodelicious recognizes the person he's currently fighting is actually Sister Spleenifer!

"It's not what it looks like!" Brodelicious pleads. "Jeff the Oracle told us that some prophecy about wines and judgments is the only way to stop Brynnan!" That checks out, I guess, and Brynnan is a douchelord, so yeah, why not? Brodelicious and Spleenifer agree to work together for now. Spleenifer announces to Sparkle the change in plans/allegiances, and to let Lucky know.

Meanwhile, Lucky is trying to calm down the servant while pretending to be his tiny twin brother. Oh, look! There's a cat you can't see down this alley and we need to go look at it in the interest of safety!

While this is happening, Brodelicious grabs a handful of the ape's fur and hoists himself atop the beast like a steed. The ape takes off in pursuit of Lucky, picking up Spleenifer to piggyback while en route. Sparkle is trying to relay this information to Lucky, but of course, there's two servant people riding atop a giant ape toward them and the whole situation looks kinda iffy from a personal safety standpoint and that means Lucky-Servant opts to keep fleeing with the real servant.

As the ape squeezes through a narrow alley in pursuit of the servant, Spleenifer (still on the ape's back with Brodelicious) throws a wrench in the plans. She jumps over the ape's head and falls prone on the street below. Before the ape can crush her with its lumbering steps, she unleashes the Weight Watcher to block the ape's path through the alley. The party decides it should have priority in getting the bribery letters for now, though Brodelicious is more than welcome to plead his case for access after emotions cool off a bit.

The real servant rounds a corner and pulls a brick from a wall to reveal a dead drop location with several incriminating letters from Lawrence Stout. The adventure concludes for the evening as the party levels up to 14!

#shits and giggles #Dungeons and Dragons #adventure log #gorilla #beverage #bankruptcy #servant #judge

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