#my everything my sun my stars the reason the earth spins the creator

[artoodeeblue]

A Lady on Paper

Find the French version along with my other original writing on this blog!

I can barely remember my birth. My first one, anyway. The cornerstone. It is shrouded in mist, cloggy like the swamp of my cradle-town. Someone must have fathered me – towers and spires rarely sprout up unannounced, I have gathered. In the echoes of my nave, I still hear the scratching of quill over parchment, the heavy bangs of the hammer, the heaving of my creators’ breaths.

The little details give me real life. I take my first breath when Gaultier chisels his initials on one of my rib vaults. His upturned tongue sticks out, almost touching the freckles on his nose. The light bounces through his walnut hair and lands on my freshly-carved stones.

“Hello,” I whisper, gently caressing his mind.

“Hi.” He smiles. Wipes the sweat from his forehead. His voice is tentative. He doesn’t quite know what he’s doing, but his tender name glows, etched into the millennia.

“Pleased to meet you, Gaultier.”

With a professional hand, he scratches another layer of mortar on his stone. In the growing mass that will become my visitors, the sound is both grounding and appeasing. Painfully, heavily, I rise.

“Me too, my Lady.”

Someone must have sired me, but my loyalty has always been to my children.

 They give me jewellery and thorn crowns, which I accept like a mother concedes to her child’s present. I don’t need them, but if they reassure them – if they can feel less alone in this world – I can carpet my walls with a thousand tapestries.

Gaultier is long gone, but his laugh still echoes in the choir. It spins around, playfully blowing out candles and raising my children’s hair. His parting gift to the generations.

 They give me eyes. I count three, round and gleaming. They flash with pastel, sketched with a delicate mix of stone and glass. With them I see my cradle-town. I see the steaming chimneys, the palace, the paved dampness of the city. I finally see my children, immersed in pink and blue light. Kneeling, muttering, singing. Confessing. They come in processions, light candles most cannot afford, speak a language I do not understand. I pray as well – that they find the answers they ask of me.

They add more intricate buttresses, for fear that I fall. I chuckle. Of course I will fall. I will burn down and crumble and fade until I am nothing more than a lady on paper. But Raymond will have none of this. He gives out orders, holding his parchment, counting steps and scratching on his board.

His touch is firm and steady. He pats me like his pet, running his fingers in the tiny creases between the stones.

(He misses Gaultier’s carvings, which I hide covetously.)

“You will become the most beautiful temple ever to stand upon this earth,” he tells me. His pompous language never fails to pry a laugh. “You will be thin as a sheet of parchment, yet your towers will stand strong until Judgment Day.”

“My sisters have not,” I try again. “Can you not hear their screams, as they fall to pieces and flames in the East? Only their ruins will see the sun rise on Judgment Day.”

“Not you,” Raymond insists. “You are better. You are good. You are holy.”

“Holier than the entire civilisation your people slaughtered in the name of God?”

His blue eyes glint with stars and hubris. He jerks his chin upwards. “Yes.”

My children are strong, and proud, and will burn themselves for a touch of the sun.

  I wonder if this was how my sisters felt in the East.

They plunder my crypt, behead my kings and saints, but I never knew them anyway – they are all mere faces tattooed without my consent. Fake jewels. Kings never come to say hello; they just waltz in, kneel, smirk, and declare war over heretics.

Julien’s little kick is nonchalant, patronising.

The pavement is coated with a thick layer of blood. It swirls around me, inside me, churns my stomach and stares at me. They don’t do much to me – maybe, underneath the harsh gaze of the Raymond they so despised, they can hear Gaultier’s murmurs of hope. I never really understood hate, but I know it quickly dissolves under permanence.

“Not so powerful now, huh, girl?”

He wears a blue and red tricorn which awkwardly frames his childish face. He cannot be over twenty, yet his tongue sticks out as if he had finally brought a lion to its knees. Still, it has been decades since I have spoken. I nudge him back.

“Never,” I answer.

Julien smirks, and waves his little flag. “We control you now,” he gloats. “You’ll never hurt anyone else again. You’ll be forgotten, just like every other part of the Old Regime.”

“So will you.”

With a giant, heaving swing, the rod comes smashing towards St Thomas. His head explodes, and the fragments scatter through my bowels.

“I despise you,” he snarls. His breath is ragged, and his chiselled jaw twitches in its socket. “You’re everything that’s evil in this world.”

I am only rocks, I want to tell him. How can stone, oak, mortar and carved initials rival with the bloody smoke-trail of a musket?

But he is already gone, running on the pavement, carried by youth and homicidal optimism.

They change my name – it belongs sometimes to Reason, sometimes to the Supreme Being, sometimes to Liberty. My children are creative, and fickle. Anything to prove that they have changed.

But a few chopped off heads do not change the tell-tale glimmer in your eyes.

  A man with almond eyes and a high forehead like mine pushes through my heavy door. His steps break my trance-like slumber, and I stir. Shy sunlight cracks through my unused eye. I blink. Slowly.

Gaultier’s laugh is no more than a whisper now. It has lost its music – has grown as lethargic as mine. Raymond’s promise flies over me like the angel of Death.

The man blows, sending a streak of fresh air over the piers. Dust materialises in the diffused rays. He stumbles around the half-ruins littered on the floor.

Electricity courses through his fingertips as he brushes my stone. I shudder. I haven’t been touched like this in centuries.

There’s an aura around him. Not divine – not like the few priests who still roam my sleepy aisles. Something rich and brown, scented with paper, ink and starlight. His eyes seek, blink, and dart in rhythm with the turn of the earth. His feet are posed firmly on the checkered tiles, yet his posture is light and dream-like. Grounded, physical, yet full of wonder. Not broken – not yet.

He smells so intensely, decidedly human.

I take a breath, and guide his hand towards the tiny alcove I made. It hides in the joint between walls, covered by dust and inconsequence. His breath gets caught in his throat, Adam’s apple bopping up and down. He religiously traces around the tired G, the sloppy H. It stings up to my spire, but tickling nerves feel much less lonely than numb inattention.

“Six hundred and fifty years,” he murmurs. “We must look like insects to you.”

I brush his skin, watching his eyes light up with Muses. Deep in the bowels of my bells, a slow rumbling comes to greet him.

“I think you look like giants, Victor.”

 Out of everyone who said hello, he’s the only one who comes back broken.

“Look at you, all pampered,” he says. “You’re a proper lady on paper now. On your way to your old beauty.”

“It is your doing, my love. Your beautiful story set the spark.”

Victor smiles, a weary, tentative thing that contrasts with the navy bags under his eyes. His back is hunched, shoulders drawn tight under his jacket.

Sometimes, Victor reminds me so much of myself it sends sparks of pain down to my crypt.

“I am so very sorry, my dear.” I send him a tender sunray, but he recoils – flinches – away. He takes a shuddering inspiration.

The clangs and thrusts of the renovation scaffolding reverberate inside the nave. Victor’s knee fidgets back and forth, up and down, synchronised with my heartbeat. His breath comes in long, trembling sighs. He dips his head a little more, letting his brows cloud his gaunt expression with shadows too old for his age.

“She was…” Victor falters. “My Leopoldine, she was only nineteen.”

He whimpers, shoulders trembling. Never in his life could he withhold emotions from his features. My Victor has always felt everything so viscerally, so fiercely, that the force of a hundred hell fires could not possibly restrain him.

His hands are linked together and his eyelids close – a small, awkward attempt to connect to something far above my spire. I stay silent.

“You’re supposed to know everything.” His mouth moves, yet his voice comes from another realm. His brow twitches. “If you’re so omniscient, can’t you at least tell me… Tell me why?”

That is the one question I cannot answer, that I can never answer.

“Why can’t you bring her back?”

His broken sobs do not echo. Neither do Gaultier’s laugh, Raymond’s hopes, Julien’s fire. They are absorbed in the scaffolding above, in the heavy oak framework, in the centuries-old mortar.

 Sometimes I wish I could speak to God. After all, am I not named after his mother?

Perhaps I am condemned to share her fate, forced to watch my children break and die, suspended to the cruel post of Time.

Demain, dès l’aube, à l’heure où blanchit la cathédrale… Je partirai.

  It feels…strange, to say the least. I am smaller, lower. Reduced.

Smoke and ashes fly from my spire over my cradle-town, my beloved light-city. My children are cut from me, staring powerless behind murmuring firemen. They pray, they sing, mutter words of comfort that I barely catch over the screaming in my mind.

It aches. The intricate carpentry consumed, the flames licking up my roof, the crashing water relentlessly boring into my shoulders. The tireless wind ramming against my walls, whistling between my towers. It carries the bystanders’ collective gasp as they watch my spire crumble and impale my flank.

A young fire woman fixes her gaze on the brazier, a stoic jawline firmly maintaining her illusion of control. I can barely discern the tell-tale glimmer of her eyes through the smoke.

“You must be in so much pain.”

Maybe, but my pain is not unbearable. My children’s is.

“Don’t worry. We will protect you.” Her voice is wobbly, with a higher pitch than usual, yet her hand on the hose could not get any steadier.

 When the sun rises over my still smouldering body, I hear relief, and I hear grief. The city, my radiant, proud, boastful people, hang in exhausted silence. It drapes over me.

My close call to destruction caused thousands of individuals to turn their heads towards an old remnant of the Regime.

“We will rebuild,” they say. From my undamaged eye, I spot their leader, surrounded by a shifting mass of microphones and cameras. “We will restore Our Lady to her former glory, and make her even more beautiful. We will make these stones alive again.”

Raymond’s voice resonates through millions of television sets. His eyes bore straight through the country.

I think of Gaultier’s sweat-filled affection, of his cheery compassion.

Of Julien’s anger at the vices of the world, of the passionate curve of his eyebrows.

I think of Victor the writer, of his beautiful smile and his magnificent tears, of his unconditional love for humanity.

I think of the three or four billionaires I have never met, who will claim to adore me by bedecking me with fake jewels, by cajoling me with impersonal wood and long-dead cold stone.

I think of my other sisters in the ocean, in the forests, in the air. Cathedrals that will never be rebuilt nor remembered, in the small scheme of political power. Monuments older than my cradle-town disappearing with the snap of two fingers, never to be seen again. Killed by hubris, disdain and general disinterest.

 My stones do not make me alive. Just like you, they decay, wither, and burn.

No. I do not remember the placing of my cornerstone.

I took my first breath when a young, gap-toothed bricklayer chiselled his initials on the slabs of my rib vault.

#writing #Notre Dame de Paris #short story #my writing #reblog if you like? please? <3

[heartyclouds]

Hear the Sea | wenseul

mythical!au, warning; implied self harm

Wendy stares at her plain beige ceiling. Feeling anxious and restless. The constant ticking of the clock, the way her eyes dart from side to side from nervousness, it was all making it harder to sleep. Her mind was liked a clogged up clock, working, but at the same time malfunctioning. It was giving her a seriously bothersome headache. She moves to the side and flinch when her vision spins and she immediately closes her eyes.

She could never sleep if this keeps on going.

She got up from her bed, her headache doing its job as brilliantly as ever. It was making her frustrated. She went to the kitchen and took some medicine for headaches, though she doubts if it’ll work. She went back to her bedroom, checking the time. It was already past midnight. She felt lonely, feeling like she was never good enough for anybody and that nobody really appreciate her or the things she does. The dangerous thoughts of hurting herself came and she immediately closes her eyes. Staying here in her empty and dark bedroom is not a good idea.

She stare at her window. She had forgotten to close the curtain. She walks up to it and starts to untie the fabric that secures the curtain from closing. When she looks up to see outside, she is met with a sight of an empty seashore, with waves kissing the edges of the sandy terrain. Suddenly, a thought from her childhood came.

-

It was a mistake coming out to the beach this late at night.

She walks on the deserted space as she leaves small footprints on the beautiful white sand. The result of a sleepless night. The cold wind is hitting her mercilessly, which is why this was a mistake. Though she didn’t turn around to go back to her house. She would stop for a while and pick up pretty washed up seashells, putting it in the pocket of her hoodie and decorate her bathroom with it later.

Her grandfather once told her to listen to the ocean if she ever feel troubled or lost, listen to the sea and it may give you whispers of an answer you needed most.

She continues to walk with no particular destination in mind. She turn her head to the side, she was never a big fan of beaches, but she must admit how beautiful it is at night. The moon and stars were shining brightly, lighting up what suppose to be pitch black. The street lights placed on the edges of the beach was also helping the illumination.

“Hear the sea.” She whispers, stopping as she continue to stare at the moonlit ocean. Maybe if she does, she’ll figure out what she wants for herself.

She sat down hugging her legs and closes her eyes. She let the wind embrace her, welcoming it. She listens to what it has to say, ignoring how her hair that usually hides her face reveals it, giving a sense of unwanted exposure to her. She listens to the voice of the waves, calming as though singing her a lullaby. She was in ataraxy. A state where she felt so relaxed she felt like she wants to cry. Her heart is beating fast, her eyes grew hotter. The lullaby that the sea sings change into something completely different. Something so emotional and filled with pure sadness. Before she could burst into tears, she opens her eyes when she felt someone tap her shoulder.

“Are you okay?” An angelic voice ask.

She turn her head to find a girl with a braided brown hair cascading into both of her shoulders. Strands of glowing silver can be seen in some part of her braids. She wears jeans shorts with a loose white blouse decorated with sliver, glowing ornaments.

Wendy blinks and realized tears had already fall to her cheeks.

“Sorry, I’m- I’m okay.”

Instead of leaving her alone again, the mysterious glowing girl sat down beside her and stare at the gleaming moon nonchalantly. Wendy stare at the girl and she finally looks back.

“My name is Seulgi. What’s yours?” She stated and asks.

“Wendy.” Though she is not sure why she felt oddly close and connected to a person she just met in the middle of the night. Not to mention at a deserted beach. She just felt a sense of trust between the girl and her. For some strange but magical reason.

“Do you hear it?” The girl turn her dazzling gaze back at the ocean.

“Hear what..?” Wendy asks slowly.

“The lament of the sea.” The girl said, her eyes twinkle as she said it. “Desperately waiting for someone to listen to what it has to say.”

Something clicks on the back of Wendy’s head, something familiar but she couldn’t recite what it was.

“So tell me,” Seulgi turn her head to Wendy with questioning features. “what is it that is bothering you so you listen to the sea?”

Wendy bows her head down to the ground, staring at the tiny beads of sand. She needs to let it out, and here Seulgi is, asking her. She is waiting to listen to anything that was bothering her. Wendy doesn’t know why, but here comes the sense of trust and connection again. As though feeling like Seulgi is a friend. She hangs her head lower before finally whispering, “I’ve somehow grown to hate myself.”

The sound of the waves are as vivid as ever, washing up emotions that humans could not feel. Breeze on the seashore brings a scent of the salty sea.

“Why do you hate yourself?” Seulgi asks innocently.

“I shouldn’t have been born, I was suppose to die the moment I stepped foot on this earth.” Wendy said and she felt tears stain her cheeks once again.

“Wendy,” Seulgi whispers. “can I tell you a story?”

Wendy nods and tries her best to hush her crying.

“Before everyone was born, we were just souls floating around from one universe to another. Mindless and weak. We begged to God, the creator of all matter, to be born. God told us everything that would happen in our life on earth. All ups and downs. We agreed to it, we were happy to have been born at all. Of course we don’t remember what God has told us, that would make life easy. It isn’t suppose to be easy. If your life is perfect, then what do others have if you take everything? Life teaches us how to be a better person so we won’t be greedy when we are in heaven. That’s what I believe.”

“I never heard of that.” Wendy said as she wipes her tears.

“Not many knows about it.” She says and turns to Wendy. “Everyone on earth is worth living. Being born is one of God’s gracious gift. We were lucky to have been born to a loving family or having friends that always makes you feel warm. Even if you’re only loved by a couple, I know they can give you the warmth of a whole sun.”

“You’re right.” Wendy said quietly. Though she doesn’t exactly know how Seulgi had known that.

“There are people out there who are more unlucky than you are, I hope you find out how precious your soul is.” Seulgi smiles, somehow her face glows under the lunar light. “Now, you better go back to your house, the wind will get stronger as the time pass.”

Wendy nods and smiles at Seulgi. She felt like a friend, comforting her when she was at her lowest. She knew every words that would make her better. Such a strange magic.

Wendy walks back to her house after bidding Seulgi goodbye.

Little did she know that Seulgi was an ocean spirit that the sea sent to help her. A returning gift for listening to what it has to say.

#red velvet #red velvet drabble #son seungwan #wendy #seulgi #kang seulgi #red velvet scenario #seuldy #wenseul #wendy x seulgi #mythical #alternate universe #red velvet fluff

[magnificentcolormoneywagon-blog]

Notes

🌐\\MAY DAY! MAY DAY! DAY. DAY.

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Ray's off and set is home we aren't this old home.

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@😎😎😎🌐🌐™

sHANty i.E.t.S. productionz

CraigoNEilmaRTin:*🔯

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Nickalos and Watson

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Nighty Night to Well which is into you wised.

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🔯Craig O'neil Martin .com

Ye.. these are acknowledgement of people of Great Kings and Queens.

There is until death is of they that has quest until they are called upon as nubian. These people are set to rituals that as they are in their owed their fought brought them to a Great Dynasty that there is a Kingdom left behind those off to be offered into these people.

KINGDOMS ARE KINGDOM : (1.)

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There's aren't there as dear is more to before as concern to their.

Merry Thankzgivings!!!

//°°|©@™®🌐.. .

Cerly ..Craig O'neil Martin.

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Thee is it these words to say upon my path. That I may not yet be off to. For ever is isn't these as those natures unto man. And as there is place to live.

Love livities.

Lives loves within.

I am.

Am I.

I

N

I

Thee's

And the peoples people's is forever

Terms that I most i

Come.

@)

Hey!!

Hey!!!

I am Hey.

MAY DAY.

MAY DAY.

DAY. DAY.

😭MAYHEM!!.

😰MAYHEM..

As we are there in the storm I to be this as you are..oh. Yes. I think so. If is it you're me. Oh then; looked.

I can't gather you're awaken in a strong morning; as if it is yet but I'm; gone!.

😳sHANty i.e.t.s PrOdUcTiOn!!!

@//°°|©😎Craig!!/.com

Mar/onei\\*)

               Sincerely Craig O'neil Martin.....;

#seekie (i )#seeki.

It is like a day nothing wrong but do I see that I can't believe I see that had.

Craig what are you doing.. I'm good I'm just sitting down. Oh!!!

I fear a steering whist; that hit me; as it hit a song.

Standing off; to know that I ain't; a dame.. Oh! I'm too much to myself.

Oh I just can been able to be searching how I got to be like a skull that need someone to give up my loves.  It is a love Lord God Almighty is if there was and still mines but another to be three is a waste to be mine; but only for another person; were I being this place to live.

(@these are vision of all thoughts to belief.°©.)

MAYHEM😙... Hi. What's up with these words handling; you're mad.

Ah/. No. but okay.

Bye!!!.

Mayhem there's a searching to the mountain that is like a big reef towards these water fountain that they are in a open turning point of flocks to the air so camping is off or what.

No but I think it's the best thing that we are going to do is just sit and wait for that time which can shows us a better day: if I wasn't thinking of all of this then I would be more understanding of none at launch makes up for it but if these saying ate what you have in mind then the time is more near than you expecting.

Just fear nothing going down with nothing but something only for us okay!!.

Oh: I think same.

So; we looking at a time more than last time into these visits opening; like that sea sailing vessel that we caught up first up like your me say can we do it here but I could be that one into this strong modes here look sea watching and the breeze too; so much is watching we.

Oh: it make a joy now you'll see. but why. It's just a easy evening looking out with you so I can't bathercthis time going out like we are going on a first date but only observing the cool leafs I'm on. Alright it's good no more.(at.)@//*°°|ฯ©´

§hAnTY i.Et..$™productioN

Creaignopdopescraigoneilmartinan##/

It took MI Vail to cover up on this feets and nothing can see me but MAYHEM I'm hungry off this are we're going utter space or going lose open air at these atmosphere we are casting or video these looks on our face.ah come to this conclusion to make a mass then going home. Yes.okay then.

Oh Mr Nightly. I'm saying good good morning.

To you morning.

Mornings.

To you.

Mornings.

Who's you calling.

Mr Nightly it's a badge I need for this one fears is if I am in these..%#55090987654324437543315.°°·°°°°°°°°°°°°.°.°°=01876.

If that's what's on then okay sir checking in sir.

Grapes oh I just can't thinking about but I'll be these two or more put it over these desk that's not my own but wait it's looks beautiful that I look low to see pencil steering me Oh go on go what it's a dream world I'm into with my fologicalinetermsipoy.

Spit on me what's that for okay.

Thanks for this.

Yes you're more likely.

The End.

Just as I seek at my best today tomorrow will be a better for we as it is for our esteem as it is yo be best of our lives we live.

(The End)

And as the angel came to the earth see the midst of all the earth and the myth of all the flock that see the death of he that know nothing of they and out of the heaven of they the coming of him that sat upon them that see him in death upon the land and the sea and of the ocean.

They that hid away from him come to pass to be seeing and rush to sure that he is the coming of they as they knew nothing of him but of what is to come as his name say yea low am I the king of glory as I speak off to you now I am and these are the sweat of my life off to buried to these named.

[blessedarethebinarybreakers]

Worship from Home: June 11, 2017

This series aims to provide folks who can’t make it to church for any variety of reasons with prayers, songs, and sermons. My hope is that these posts will help you worship from home, knowing that others are using the same content and thus, though we may be miles and miles apart, we worship together. See this post for more information.

If you prefer to worship with different material, see this masterpost of sermons and full services online that should all be LGBT+ friendly.

This Sunday is considered Trinity Sunday, when we celebrate the One God who is Three Persons. This is a good time to ponder what it means that we have a relational, social God, a God of love and diversity -- what the Trinity means for our relationship with God, with one another, and with Creation.

[Image description: An abstract painting in which three figures dance, each on one toe with the other leg in the air, with their arms around each other -- their arms blend so that it is hard to tell where one figure ends and the next begins. There is no distinctive gendering of the figures. Colors include deep blue, shades of goldish brown, and shades of green and pink. This image represents the attempt to describe the Trinity as Perichoresis, Greek for “Dance around.” See this webpage for more on this concept: “The choreia or dance of God is the choreography of the cosmos, the interrelationship of Creator, creation, and life itself, the holy creativity of the All in All.”] 

Let us worship God, together. 

(The worship material is under the readmore -- let me know if you are unable to access it!)

Gathering

Prepare yourself to worship.

Meditate on the below poem, pondering what God as Trinity means to you. How do you understand the Trinity? What questions do you have about it? How do you relate to each of the three Persons of the Trinity -- Father (Mother? Parent? Source? Creator?), Son (Child? Word? Redeemer?), and Holy Spirit (Wisdome? Sustainer?) -- and how do you relate to the Triune God as a whole?

A piece by Michael Coffey, “Trinity is a Poem”: 

Trinity is a poem uttered free verse as cosmic love gift sending sound waves through earth to hurl speech into the ionosphere stirring radio waves to hum

Trinity is a synchronistic dream we and God have nightly about the interface of human and divine the matrix of connections between holy and common

Trinity is a syncopated counterpoint of melody lines referencing each other and making music as sonorous as whales and pulsars and seismic waves all held in tension

then someone inscribed the free utterance in indelible ink and someone analyzed the shared dream with Freudian precision and someone forced the messy melodies smooth in straight time

behold: just when they think they finished the job and brush the dust of such work off their hands and rest Trinity dances out the door and finds willing partners to twirl

Call to Worship

God of delight, your Wisdom sings your Word at the crossroads where humanity and divinity meet.

Invite us into your joyful being where you know and are known in each beginning, in all sustenance, in every redemption,

that we may manifest your unity in the diverse ministries you entrust to us, truly reflecting your triune majesty in the faith that acts, in the hope that does not disappoint, and in the love that endures.

Amen.

(source)

Hymn: “How Wonderful the Three In One” (one of my favorite hymns!) lyric text here (see page 3 of the PDF)

Confession

Loving God, 

By speaking you create all that is and give order and goodness to the universe.

You place it all in our hands, and thus we think it belongs to us. Your order is that the world would sustain us,  but our plan is to own it and mess with your order.

Your Son came and showed us the grace of your love, and he commissions us to baptize and teach all nations -- but we do not even reach out to our neighbors.

Every day we are wrapped in your grace and love, yet in the arrogance of our lives, we wrestle free of your embrace.

Save us, O God, from the sins we know in our hearts. Save us, O God, from the sins we hide.

Assurance of Pardon

Our loving God never desires to be separated from us. Into our human existence God sends Jesus Christ, God’s own son, and our sins are forgiven. In repentance and forgiveness we are created again, and renewed by the power of the Holy Spirit. Again we hear the Son’s commission and live as the saints of God’s church. Let us give thanks to the Parent, and the Child, and the Holy Spirit, for such mercy and transformative love. 

Amen. 

[Source of confession and assurance; edited slightly]

Prayer before Scripture

God, whose fingers sculpt sun and moon and curl the baby's ear; Spirit, brooding over chaos before the naming of day; Savior, sending us to earth's ends with water and words: startle us with the grace, love, and communion of your unity in diversity, that we may live to the praise of your majestic name.

Amen.

(source) 

Scripture

Genesis 1:1 - 2:4a

... Then God said, “Let us make humankind in our image, according to our likeness; and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the wild animals of the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps upon the earth.” ...

Psalm 8

... When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers,    the moon and the stars that you have established; what are human beings that you are mindful of them,    mortals that you care for them? ...

2 Corinthians 13:11-13

...The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God, and the communion of the Holy Spirit be with all of you. 

Matthew 28:16-20

Full passage: Now the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain to which Jesus had directed them. When they saw him, they worshiped him; but some doubted. And Jesus came and said to them, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything that I have commanded you. And remember, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”

Sermons

Option 1: “A Glowing Oven Full of Love;” text only; a little long

A sermon on God as relationship -- how the dance of the Trinity informs our own call to relationality as well as our understanding of God as living among us rather than aloof from creation and suffering 

“God is not some simple, solitary, isolated, individual being. God is not some kind of Wizard of Oz hiding out behind the curtain of the stars. God is not personal in that sense. That’s anthropomorphic. Rather, God is personal in the sense that God is the love that creates, redeems and sustains everything that exists. The life of God is like a divine dance of persons in love from which sparks fly, the love that moves the sun and the other stars. At the heart of the universe is the divine dance of persons in love, and if God is the love that creates and reconciles and transforms all that exists, then God must be relational in God’s essence. So when we say that God is Trinity, it is a way of saying that God is love, nothing but burning love and a glowing oven full of love, a love that overflows into all of creation. ...”

Option 2: “Diversity in Divinity,” video only; 17 minutes

(My favorite of these sermon options, but unfortunately it doesn’t have subtitles)

A good sermon for those who struggle to understand or believe in the Trinity. It also goes into the history of the doctrine of the Trinity and discusses expansive language about God. How does our language around the Trinity affect our relationships with God and each other?

“Might the Trinity be asking us this morning that it’s not something to be grasped intellectually ...The Trinity is something that wants to be experienced -- that it’s about this dynamic relationship between the three in one or the one in three that continues to play, and tweak, and change. That the Trinity is this mystery that keeps our heads and our hearts spinning. That just when we think we have it figured out, something in our life changes the way we interact with God -- or Spirit, Mother, Daughter, Son, Father -- in a new way.”

Option 3: “Three in Order”; text only; very short 

(Not my favorite option but good if you don’t have time for a longer one)

Not exactly a sermon, more of a reflection on the nature of the Trinity: “Pentecost reminds us that God's power sometimes works in the midst of chaos - heck, sometimes God's power is the very thing that causes the chaos! And, Trinity Sunday reminds us that even in the midst of that chaos, God has some kind of order happening whether we can see it or not.”

Option 4: “Sermon for Trinity Sunday”; text and audio available; medium length 

A sermon by a Native American Christian that addresses the pain that the “Great Commission” of Matthew 28:16-20 has all too often wrought, with hope for the future of this commission 

“The question on this Trinity Sunday, when we stand at the moment of understanding the great mystery of our faith in the triune God, I think we have to once again confront the question of our attitude about whether or not we believe Christianity should continue to be a missionary church. Do we have to go to one extreme or the other? Do we have to deny any missionary activity on our part, or do we have to just simply bow our necks and go forward, forgetting, forgetting, all that has happened before? ...”

Prayers of the People

Holy, holy, holy God, in calling forth creation from the void, revealing yourself in human flesh, and pouring forth your wisdom to guide us, you manifest your concern for your whole universe.

You invite us, as your people, to gather the world's needs into our hearts and bring them before you. Pray now for yourself, for the people in your life, for strangers and enemies and friends, and for Creation -- for whatever is on your heart. 

Holy, holy, holy God, fill us with strength and courage, with discernment and compassion, that we may be your instruments of justice and love in this world, that it may be on earth as it is in heaven. Amen.

(source) 

Benediction 

Triune God, whose self-sustaining love overflows into all Creation, you whirl into our lives and sweep us up in your lively dance.

Now send us dancing out into your world, to fill its empty aching with your love, to subdue its pain with your peace, to make your good news known far and wide in what we say and what we do.

Source of life -- we glorify you and grow in your love.  Redeemer of life -- we follow you and strive to be like you. Sustainer of life -- we walk with you, as you whirl through the world and use our hands to transform death into new, radiant, abundant life.

Amen. 

Hymn: “Anthem”; lyrics here  alternative (more traditional): “Go My Children with My Blessing”

[Image description: an embroidered version of an Orthodox icon representing the Trinity as three winged figures sitting around a table. No figure has any features that really “genders” them, nor does any one seem “above” the others. See here for more on this type of depiction of the Trinity.]

#worship from home #sermon #church online #trinity #trinity sunday #queerly christian posts #avery speaking

[tube-thoughts-blog]

Vol. 15

zero stars - terrible, 1/2 a star - dull, 1 star - folly, 1 1/2 stars - lacking, 2 stars - fair, 2 1/2 stars - decent, 3 stars - terrific

The Haunted: Stalked By A Vampire *Bumps in the night & an invisible sucker of energy, Animal Planet? Okay, the family had a dog & 2 cats, animal enough for ya? A mom of 5, w/ a husband away at work all the time, projects her somber moods over certain recent life events, like her admitted miscarriages, onto her family. Instead of time spent really trying in the care of mental health experts, paranormal "experts" are called in. The spook investigators sound like they're making a metaphor about this "energy Vampire" continuing to follow this woman around as if they really meant to be saying her mental health problems. Sadly, they're serious only about the supernatural & not this woman or family's mental well being.* 1 star

Jerry Springer: "I'm Happy I Cut Off My Own Legs!" *A middle aged man turned trans-gender woman achieves another lifelong goal when "she," after many hilariously described failed attempts (homemade guillotine),  discovers that a power saw is the right tool for the job. On a side note, Caitlyn Jenner is still a former male Olympics track star w/ both "her" legs.* 1 star

The Comfort Zone w/ Ray Comfort: Ken Ham "Aliens Go To Hell" (Live Interview) *The creator of the Creation Museum claims to be saying that he doesn't believe that NASA is complete nonsense, but he suggests that it's a waste of time & money. From the smarmy & unfunny remarks of Ken, Ray, & the other co-hosts/tools it's obvious that they're attempting, & failing, in trying to tie the secular scientific community in w/ hardcore UFO believers.* 1 star

Penn & Teller Bullshit!: Twelve Stepping & Hypnosis *Have a disease? Then get on your knees. Close your eyes, count backwards, & you're cured.* 3 stars

--- Everything Is Terrible:

*M... Kay...: God first, money second, cosmetics third, individuality somewhere after family & a career w/ Mary Kay.* 2 1/2 stars

*Pre-Marital Sex Who Do You Listen To: Listen to the dorky 80s rock band PETRA, some supposed experts in the emerging HIV-AIDS crisis who have an obvious religious bias, &  your local Republican congressman & or minister... heck could have been dad's country club golf buddy / spiritual guru of the green. Keep your privates holy & clean.* Decent

*Sheep: "Have you ever had a mountain top experience, girls?" We know that if you listen to this Peggy Hill look-&-act-a-like w/ her own baaaa talk show, you haven't had a female orgasm, because that's not righteous of a lady, baaaaa!* either 1 or 3 stars

*Evolution Is, As Evolution Does: "A dog, a wolf, a coyote, & a banana. Which is not like the others?" I give up. I need further religious instruction to answer this question or parable. Oh, it's not a parable? It's just an attempt to disprove evolution... banana!* Folly! me banana. Daylight come & me still don't know if earth 6 thousand or 6 billion old!

*2 Minute - The Second Coming: End times & a non-believer can't even get a cheeseburger & a medium coke w/out the mark of the beast or ending up like an unfortunate soul in a story by Edgar Allan Poe.* either 1 or 3 stars

----------------------------------------------------

GoodBadFlicks.com : Dead Heat *Treat Williams looks so much like Bill Pullman. Treat Williams makes a great zombie.Treat Williams & Joe Piscopo make a great buddy cop duo. The 80s were probaby the only decade that a great zombie cop buddy action comedy could be made.* 3 stars for the review

--- Siskel & Ebert: The Worst Films of 1984 (aka The Stinkers of 84)

*Always loved the intros for Siskel & Ebert. I'm more familiar w/ the one from my childhood where they meet out in front of the theater looking grumpy while buying newspapers & paying the cabbie. This one is from close to a decade earlier & they're much more cheery fellows as they go about a quirky routine of getting their movie concession snacks.

*Sheena, Queen of the Jungle: Roger thinks that Sheena isn't even a good bad movie w/ inappropriate music for the action scenes "sounds like it belongs in a honeymoon video" & Tanya Roberts not being sexy enough. I like that Roger is thinking like Joe Bob. Yeah, doesn't look great to me. Yep, 80s & before were about the only time a blonde white chick could be seriously considered a jungle queen.* looks like folly

*Rhinestone: Siskel isn't fond of hearing Sylvester Stallone sing bad country music in a popular, at the time, urban cowboy genre disaster. I wouldn't either. Dolly Parton is his co-star & it looks like they had zero chemistry. Could have been the awful dialogue. More weird is that Stallone seemed to be trying a southern accent... ugh...* 1 star

*Bolero: Roger & Gene like Bo Derek better in Tarzan & 10. This is one of those infamous movies that true film fans always hear about & torture themselves with. No thanks. Looks awkward & one of those arthouse flicks that make sex dull.* 1/2 a crushed matador's penis

*Cannonball Run 2: Gene can't appreciate a country wide car race movie that only has a small animated car race at the end. I remember liking these Cannonball Run movies as a kid. Not sure if they still hold up. Probably couldn't stomach so much of Burt's physicalcomedy. Dom Deluise makes me slightly chuckle though.* close to 2 stars

*City Heat: Roger thinks that bad action & bad comedy equals a bad movie. Siskel thinks that the actors slept walked through the making of it. One would think that an Eastwood & Reynolds 1920s or 30s gangster buddy film would have some entertaining value, but it looks like it was played way too tongue in cheek.* 1 star

*Dune: Siskel & Ebert think Dune was squandered potential. Turning out to be dusty in its ugly presentation & confusingly boring. As poorly made as "an old serial like Captain Video." Dune is another divisive infamous movie. I'm not qualified enough to comment on it as I've never gotten around to seeing it. Only David Lynch movie that I haven't.*

*Siskel & Ebert's honorable mentions of 84:

*Friday the 13th, The Final Chapter: "Bad news it won't be the last one." Respectfully, I say, screw you, Gene. Lucky for us 80s kids, he was right.*

More than decent.

*Windy City: "Tearjerker about a guy mostly in love with himself." A forgettable romantic comedy looks like. Every generation of movie goers has hundreds of 'em.* Dull.

*The Woman in Red: "Kelly LeBrock was not on screen enough." - Siskel. Also starring Gene Wilder lusting over her. Can't blame either Gene.* could be fair.

*Where The Boys Are: "Sex & surf replaced by inflatable dolls & sun tan lotion." - Ebert. Sounds like Roger is bitter about being too old & chubby to go to the beach where they were filming 80s sex comedies. Was it a sex comedy?* another could be fair.

*Best Defense: "A stupid military espionage story." starring Dudley Moore & Eddie Murphy .Murphy was already teaming up w/ other actors to make bad comedy movies in 84? I thought Eddie was on fire until some time in the 90s when he started screwing up.* early folly

*Harry & Son: "Painfully contrived" father son movie featuring Paul Newman.* skip, 1/2 star

*Silent Night, Deadly Night: "Crude, mean spirited slasher movie" & not a Holiday classic? What did Gene expect? It's A Wonderful Life? Thank Santa for mean spirited 80s holiday themed slasher movies. Again, this time I'll have to respectfully disagree w/ a generation of movie reviewers my parents' age who just didn't get a certain genre's finer points.* more than decent

Gene promises a feature on Hollywood's hottest new comic. Coming, next week, "The Secret of Bill Murray." Ha. Awesome time period.

Siskel & Ebert are sponsored by: Diet Shasta (generic soda for generic people like Gene & Roger), Pan Am airlines for those who wanna be spread across the Pacific ocean like so much untraceable no rescue debris... Raisinets & Goobers... Glade Smoke Away fordingy smokers who stink & wear dingy colored clothes like Gene & Roger & every other adult in the early 80s...

Roger & Gene separate at the entrance to leaving the theater. Trying to pretend that they don't secretly go to a motel together after the movies.

-----------------------------------------------------

Occult Demon Cassette presents "Rock, It's Your Decision" 1982 (Christian Anti-Rock VHS) *It's your decision to surrender to your parents' & youth minister's opinion on devil music. That is unless you, being a dumb teenager wasting precious brain cells on rock & bible school lessons, can find, via religiously biased "research" materials backed up by scripture, a damn good reason to damn your soul to hell with rock music. Bwahahaha! That laugh might have sounded evil. But it came from a wholesome, square & uptight, while at the same time trying to be understanding to teens, youth minister.* folly

Uncharted Zone: I Only Set the Stage - Paul Gormley *Dad rock in dad jean shorts. She devil in red. The pit of hell & horrible green screen amateur music video fx. Also that ole aging rocker cosplay Satan himself.* close to 2 stars

--- Night Flight (1990):

*A jean ensemble wearing 80s teen breaks into the carnival to blast his rock cassette ove rthe audio system & to ride the rollercoaster all by himself. Sony "Take It For A Spin" 2 1/2 stars

*West Michigan's "Kids Film Festival" featuring "Problem Child 1"... "The Jetsons Movie"... Bill Cosby's "Ghost Dad"... "The Jungle Book".. "Back to the Future 3"...* 2 1/2 stars

*"Give 'Em A Brake!" road worker safety ad sponsored by the "Detroit Pistons" & the Michigan Department of Transportation. I don't want to sound like Bill O'Reilly, here, but looking at the short shorts on the early 90s NBA players makes me miss pre-HIP HOP fashions & attitudes NBA. Not a lot of disgusting tattoos either. They actually look like basketball players not "thugs" in baggy pajamas.* more than 2 stars

*Toon Theater - Goodnight Norma... Goodnight Milton: A miserable couple show their very grotesque secret sides when they get home from a night out with "friends" that they despise behind closed doors.* 3 stars

*Night Flight bumper featuring Bela Lugosi & Boris Karlof playing a game of chess.* 3 stars

*"They're young, they're beautiful, & we have their private phone numbers." Call 1 900... Yeah, I seriously doubt beautiful women want their private phone numbers given out to perverts.* more than 2 1/2 stars

*A bald middle aged man is positively thrilled w/ his game show experience on Grand Rapids tv's "The Jokers Wild."* 2 1/2 stars

*A kid sits on his carpet floor playing w/ his firetruck dreaming about one day becoming a fireman. On the 13 inch t.v. starts playing a cheesy jingle "America needs you... America needs me... America the beautiful, we're gonna save the free... So, I'm gonna be the best that I can be because America needs me!" The kid is magically transported onto the back of a firetruck on a fire & rescue mission. He's zapped back to his living room floor w/ a new "America Needs Me!" t-shirt. He gives a thumbs up & says "Drug Free"... Central Michigan Substance Abuse Center... Huh? What the hell did the fireman fantasy have to do with drugs? I'm so confused.* close to 3 stars or 1 star

*Extreme closeups of mouths as they give confessions to the camera "I couldn't help myself" along with pulsating drum & synth music as the off camera industrial fan blows the hotmodel's hair as she holds an ominous red telephone not connected to anything. It's not a wireless phone, it's one of the old school curved chorded phones, so that's why it looks odd to me & I've decided to comment on it & waste words doing so.* 3 stars

*A grandma sits down in the rocking chair, in her shack, to tell a bedtime story to a young child... for some reason, it appears that the tape cuts out & shoots to somethingelse.. not sure if this is part of the story... doesn't seem so... maybe I'm wrong

*"From Outerspace They Came" logo for a 50s sci fi style flick

*Now claymation monsters in a claymation city... looks great

*Guitar solo & the beginning of "Would you take me to Funky Town" cool

*50s sci fi space explorers sit back & prepare to be blasted off into space... I'm ready

*Logo for "Space Monster" where an astronaut encounters a creepy looking humanoid alien who won't stop flicking his tongue.* Weird, thumbs up

*Grandma's back to tell another story... So, I guess beginning w/ the first time we saw her that was the first Night Flight video essay.* 3 stars for that one

*Here begins another Night Flight Video Essay

*1940s looking cartoon screen card for "The Pincussion Man" as Bowie & Queen's "Under Pressure" begins to play.

*It's a happy cartoon planet of balloon animal creatures & explosions

*interspiced into that is a 50s era show or movie featuring a guy being hypnotized to walk funny & then being levetated onto a table.* goes together well.* 3 stars for that essay, unless this is gonna be one big long essay. I'm unclear, so I'm breaking it up.

*Grandma's back for her bit & to start another song w/ selected animation / skits for it

*Witchy cat woman Diana Ross leads a hunk, in a white suit, by the hand through a dreamlike black & white world.* She's into horror makeup like her protege Michael Jackson, I guess

*She's a panther woman but she "don't wanna be eaten alive" even though she's planning on sucking the meat from this guy's bones. Eat me, Diana, Mistress of the Motown Night!

*It sounds like Michael Jackson is singing backup vocals on this song. Sounds good & 80s funky.* More than 2 1/2 stars for that one.

*Grandmas back, once again, & once upon a time... But the Nightflight bumper & announcer lady means that entire series of video essays is over, I'm assuming.*

*Not even 20 minutes into this episode of Night Flight & there's already been more entertainment content value than most modern cable channels, much less their lineup of awful shows, feature all fucking day & night long.* Viva Night Flight

*Spooky as shit ad for a psychic hotline. Most psychic hotlines usually feature white & black trash idiots talking about how it helped their relationships or fortunes. This one is complete X-Files nightmare inducing photoshop of Egyptian images, ghost children, zooming cosmos, skulls, phantom robed creatures, & other ancient religious iconography.* 3 stars

*Promo for the tabloid news journal show "Inside Edition" featuring a story on a cop undercover as a teenager. He gets executed by students. Maybe his very adult mustache was a giveaway. His grieving mom is nothing to laugh at, but Inside Edition is the one doing the exploiting, I'm sure. Probably pretending it's some kind of youth crime epidemic & not some random & odd circumstance act. Ah, there's host Bill O'Reilly. Ha.* 1 star

*Ad for a dirtbike arena racing "Thrills & Chills" home video.* I'll pass. 2 stars

*special preview for "Frankenhooker" coming to vhs home video.* 3 stars

*Comedy Cuts - Mario Joyner: Jokes about how black folks don't try to get a fade by frost bite in the Winter like white folk do w/ their sun tan in the Summer.* close to 2 1/2 stars

*Comedy Cuts - Norman Gunston - Roving Reporter: A neurotic Brit raves about some bloodbank conspiracy & then startles random real people on the Hollywood Walk of Fame while asking them for free blood donations. Ha.* close to 3 stars

*Inside Edition promo about Judy Garland's failed comeback tv show. No surprise that this shameless show picks easy targets like dead celebrities. Then, an even more ironic story featuring Bill Cosby talking with teens about sex... Oh, boy....* 1 star

*A morbid "This little piggy" ends in a toe tag for an abused child. In a Child Welfare League of America ad. A grim time period involving child abuse.*

2 stars

*Feature on the resurgence of 70s shock rocker Alice Cooper.* 2 1/2 stars

*Night Flight makes use of their vault of movie & cartoon clips for some horse riding, cowboy, wild indian, kung fu, arabian knight horseback tricks action in a faux ad for "Billy Jo Bob's Riding Academy" "2 Miles Past Bucky's Gunshop"* cool close to 3 stars

*Tuxedo wearing James Stacy holds up a Dirty Harry sized handgun & then says that drunk drivers do more damage. "It could cost you an arm & a leg." He then reveals to be missing both his arm & leg. Heavy, but I'm not sure which statistic is higher for U.S. deaths.* close to 2 1/2 stars. They really don't know how to do effective, startling public service announcements, like this one, anymore.

*Bela Lugosi in "The Phantom Creeps": "Mad Genius Running Wild" the papers say as Bela creates things like a giant killer robot, super villain invisibility, & bombs that can be tossed like firecrackers.* 2 1/2 stars

*Painter Paul Collins shows off his artwork from time spent on a Native American Indian reservation & he calls them an "endangered species" in an ad for the Michigan Indian Child Welfare Agency.* 2 1/2 stars

*The silhoutte of an 80s chick & the breathy words "fantasy phone" must have been enough to get phone sex horny losers to "finish" after the chick tells them "I'll start & yo ufinish." 5 dollars for the first minute. They want their 5 bucks first because they know that you'll finish in under a minute if you're desperate enough to call one of these numbers. Just a "hot" girl speaking to you at all is enough to reach climax.* 2 stars

*Rocky Horror Picture Show - Timewarp: Might have seemed lazy to toss this classic into the late night variety, but it hadn't been done to death by this point or ruined by the awful people involved with the musical show "Glee."*

2 1/2 stars

*The Fleshtones - I Was a Teenage Zombie: Would make a great B-side to "Surfin' Dead" plus the movie clips look decent as well.* close to 3 stars

*Yazoo - Don't Go: Don't remember the video for this being so horror inspired.* Decent

*Sheena Easton - Telephone: All the classic Universal monsters plus a disembodied hand are after Sheena. Can't say that I blame them after she tempted all w/ her "Sugar Walls"* 2 1/2 stars

*Comedy Cuts - Colin Quinn: He pokes fun at growing up Irish-Catholic dealing w/ cop relatives & touchy priests.* close to 3 stars

*Louis Armstrong's "Wonderful World" set to video of kung fu cinematic action.* 3 stars

*Rudy Vallee in The Musical Doctor: A singing emergency room where a "Step & fetch it" black stereotype is seeking treatment. The doc prescribes him the smooth sounds of inter-spliced clips of Sting from The Police (huh? ha!). He's black, so he'll also need a dose of interspliced Chaka Khan's "I Feel For You."* either 1 or 3 stars

*Old old Hollywood clips of beautiful ladies doing some synchronized swimming dances while the Night Flight voice over lady pokes fun at Dr. Vallee's techniques.* 3 stars

*Dr. Vallee has another crazy patient. This one has hammer toe "Stop Hammertime" w/ the MC himself spliced in. No kidding.* 2 1/2 stars

*Another patient is suffering from lack of music, so he gets some Dionne Warwick "That's What Friends Are For" followed by Biz Markie's "Just a Friend" R & B from "Babyface"... blues from some of the masters... more MC Hammer "Can't Touch This"... my my my my.... "Bel Biv Devoe" for dessert...* 2 1/2 stars early Obamacare

*Cultural tv game show featuring everything from President Ike to President Reagan from James Dean to Disco. Hot pants to the VCR. "Tic Tac Dough."* close to 3 stars

*Not ready for tv women in an ad for the Displaced Homemaker Program. This is exactly why women need not to be homemakers or second class citizens. I'm no liberal or femi-nazi controlled thinker, but seeing these poor women's lives ruined after divorce or becoming a widow is just sad & a product of our failure as a society.* 2 stars

*Pretentious Bono in a cowboy hat during one of U2's concert tours from the 80s. One where they're filming it in black & white. He's trying to get art street cred by having blues legend B.B. King join U2 on stage.* 2 stars

*B.B. King - I Need Some Help: performed on what looks like Austin City Limits. This time w/out Bono to ruin the performance.* 2 1/2 stars

*B.B. King - Lucille: Steve Martin, Dan Akroyd, the lovely Michelle Pfeiffer, & Eddie Murphy join B.B. for a quirky video.* close to 3 stars

*Robert Cray - Right Next Door: Rather subdued, sitting alone in an artsy room w/ flowing curtain window w/ bare minimum light shining through it, guitar solo video.* 2 1/2 stars

*Robert Cray - Nothing But a Woman: This video has Cray singing & 80s cartoon graphic sinterspliced w/ Cray & the band video fx. 80s MTV & Monty Python esque* 2 1/2 stars

*Albert Collins - The Trouble W/ Money: This looks like a 70s era performance on something like The Midnight Special. Collins is a haggard looking old school black dude who plays his guitar like he's making love to a woman.*

close to 3 stars

*Renee Taylor's "2" (1967 short comedy film): Parody of pretentious Eye-Talian cinema & modern people's pretentious self loathing in love affairs.*

close to 3 stars

*"Big Cheese & the Food Groupies" California Raisins style animated wholesome snack PSA w/ the characters singing in the fridge for some happy kids.* 2 1/2 weird stars

*Night Flight's Sci Fi Monsters video essay:

*Oingo Boingo - Weird Science: Interspliced w/ old clips of early 20th century films like "A Voyage to the Moon" or whatever it's called.* more than decent

*"We Have the Technology" interspliced w/ the electrocution scene from the 50s classic "Thing from Another World."* close to terrific

*The theme from Doctor Who interspliced w/ Doctor Who style robots & a stadium rock anthem by TimeLords.* 3 stars

*Kate Bush is a spooky banshee in "Experiment 4".* 3 stars

*"Ladies & gentleman, Elvis 1990" a Billy Idol look-a-like spliced w/ scenes of cyberpunk dystopias & Godzilla.* close to 3 stars

*Now a true Elvis look-a-like in outerspace singing "Video Babe" while flying saucers destroy Washington monuments.* 3 stars

*Herbie Hancock's 80s synthesizer classic spliced w/ scenes of early 20th century movie magic explorers encountering dangerous tribe people of the moon.* 2 1/2 stars

*Fishbone? in a weird sci video that ends in a nuclear explosion.*

could be terrific

*Night Flight's Never Coming Attractions:

*GI's go rocket riding in "Invasion of the Star Creatures": Super tall & sexy vixens from the stars encounter some dopey & short in stature army privates who they seduce & unleash kooky monsters upon.*

3 stars, I'd watch it, looks cheesy good.

*"Space Monster": 50s sci fi space adventure where the spaceships & planets are held up by string & the stars are holes pocked in a black canvas w/ light shining through. The alien monster is a humanoid w/ a large head, big ears, & a flickering tongue.* 2 1/2 stars

*Della's Diner, a West Michigan theater presentation of a kitschy diner complete w/ big haired waitresses & eccentric patrons. All presented by the local Grand Rapids tv station.* 2 1/2 stars

*Another "America Needs Me Drug Free" PSA featuring this time a black kid who wants to grow up to be like his black hero fighter pilot. He only got a t-shirt, no ride on the jet like the boy on the firetruck. I guess the Air Force said no. Darn. Do drugs!* 2 stars

*Night Flight's toon theater:

*Mouseferatu: Very well animated & sort of risque. When Mousey finds his intended victim, she's a very sexy pussycat sleeping in the nude. & despite all his rage, he's still just a rat in a cage when daylight comes to turn him to bones.* 3 stars

*Retro black & white clip of some ranch cows & a bull singing a country & western diddy.* 3 stars

*Promo for "Ghoulies 2" on Grand Rapids TV 8.* 3 stars

Following Night Flight on TV 8 is the syndicated cult classic "Dynaman" mock dubbed in English & parodying the already super-weird Japanese Power Rangers pre-cursor.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

"Dog Police" *A nerd rock 80s weirdo band's lead singer takes his werewolf date to the night club where the trench coat "Untouchables" look-a-like "Dog Police" bust her for bestiality?* 3 stars

James Randi Debates Two Mediums & Psychiatrist Brian Weiss *Gay mustache & spirit aficionado James Van Praagh along w/ 20 questions for 20,000 gullible people champion John Edward bring a hack psychiatrist & author of a book about past lives to a debate w/ admitted cynic Randi. Which leads to Randi face palming & taking the whole thing about as serious as one would imagine. CNBC's half zombie half talk show host Charles Grodin seems to be hopeful about the psychic claims.* 1 star

Penn & Teller Bullshit!: Feng Shui & Bottled Water *A refreshing arrangement sold at a bullshit price.* 3 stars

--- DinosaurDracula.com presents Creepy Commercials Countdown:

*ABC TGIF Monster Bash Weekend (1993): The Olsen twins host the Halloween edition of TGIF. When you're 11, you're definitely uncool enough to watch ABC on a Friday night. I still am uncool enough. Family Matters was the Breaking Bad of its era. Boy Meets World never appealed to me. Step By Step was okay. I remember most about it having the guy from the Kickboxer sequel. Hangin' With Mr. Cooper is lame when you think back on it, but it worked for the time. A "cool" middle school or junior high teacher who was down w/ the kids & played basketball. However, nothing about this particular promo is spooky or creepy enough. The 80s would have tried harder w/ the scary theme than the 90s seemed to.* 2 stars

*Real Ghostbusters Super Weapons (1990): Some kids take their awesome Nerf officially licensed Real Ghostbusters toy weapons of minor destruction & chase the poor dog around their spooky dark house. That's what I call fun animal abuse. *wink* 3 stars

*Predator 2 (1990) Movie Promo: I love the narrator's voice describing all of Predator's high tech weapons. Similar sounding voices noted all the high tech features of new cars at the time. It slipped my mind that Bill Paxton is in this movie. Of course everyone who has seen it will remember Danny Glover's manic, awesome performance, or Gary Busey being in it before he went completely off the deep end of eccentricity. But Bill Paxton was in both the Alien & the Predator sequels. That's cool.* 3 stars

*Coca-Cola Classic 'Dracula' (1992): A Bela Lugosi impersonator, in a striking visually black & white castle setting, scares a blonde victim from her sleep. Instead of putting up a cross, in defense, it's a juicy red Coca-Cola can. I guess Dracula's blood sugar was low, because he goes from pale to plump tan in seconds. He bites into the can sideways & slurps the syrupy soda. What coke addict hasn't imagined something similar? The ad end sbadly, however, as it approaches Twilight sparkly "vampire" territory when the spooky couple walk out the door into an animated Disney daytime cartoon scene complete w/ chirping love birds.* either 1 or 3 stars

*Highland Superstores 'Phantom of the Opera' (1989): The organ music from "The Phantom" is still unsettling after around a 100 years of it being in our nightmares. Dinosaur Dracula mentioned this, in his article, & it's true, "appliance stores are dreadfully dull." In the 80s, during the era of dull parents & dingy colors on everything including off white & putrid yellow fridges, microwaves, washers & dryers, & dishwashers. Some were even the same green color of The Creature from the Black Lagoon's bowel movements. If I were "The Phantom" I wouldn't dwell at Highland Superstores. If I were a disgruntled former manager of an appliance store, I wouldn't. Hell would seem happier.* 2 1/2 stars

----------------------------------------

Beavis & Butthead: Plasmatics - The Damned *"Explosions... half naked chicks. This video has something for everyone."*

3 plus stars w/ riffing 3 stars w/out

--- TV Carnage:

*Straight Body Builder Bio #1: "When in Rome do as the Romans do." The Romans did gay stuff in Rome. In Southern California, this feminine Rick James, on roids, can make delicious ancient Chinese herbal tea, draw comics of other buff fantasy masculine heroic figures, strum his string instrument, & play w/ his pooch on the beach.* close to 2 1/2 stars

*Tell Me About It: The reporting from the red carpet premier of Legally Blonde is as dumb & inspid as imagined.* zero stars

*The Hump Day Return of Aids!: "Real men don't talk to their women about sex." Laughs. Huh. Huh. Starts humping potentially aids infected partner.*

2 1/2 stars

*Tom Arnold Stars In Long Lost Porn: Didn't know Tom was so patient & considerate to the half naked chicks he lets ride on the back of his Harley Davidson.* 2 1/2 stars

--------------------------------

"The Last Dragon" (1985) *A midnight movie happening inside another midnight movie featuring kids from Soul Train. Also feels like Motown is making fun of MTV's Cindy Lauper & Madonna.* 3 stars

"Shotgun" (1989) *A buddy cop Lethal Weapon wannabe that's almost as awkward as Samurai Cop. There's a plot about a sicko torturing & killing hookers that's similar to Wings Hauser's "Vice Squad. "Then a finale that's a revenge gunfight south of the border that recalls 70s grindhouse classic "Rolling Thunder" but is more over the top like a Rambo sequel.* between 2 & 2 1/2

Cannon Films "Hospital Massacre" (1981) *Creepy fact: if you ever walk into a room & see someone crawling out a window, looking back w/ a devious smile on their face, know something horrible has happened in the room. Our scream queen, the gorgeous Barbi Benton, doesn't even realize she's being stalked by a slasher for over an hour of the movie. She thinks she's just being inconvenience by hospital procedure red tape & a screwed up test result. However, the kills are bloody good, the atmosphere is spooky, & there's even some black comedy.*

more than 2 1/2 stars or plus

"Video Wasteland Combilation" *Twinkle Twat, feminine deoderant spray. Baby upchuck doll. Punk singer w/ dry heaves. Way USA starring Tesco Vee. Aeon Flux. Tim Allen as Docu-Comic. Dawn of the Night of the Dead - The Musical. John Waters & Divine. West Germany Air Show Disaster. Vincent Price on the 64,000 Dollar Question. LSD-25. This Is Elvis's Birthday '92.* 2 1/2 stars

SCTV Monster Chiller Horror Theatre w/ Count Floyd: The House of Cats *Bored housecats "jumping" at the screen in 3D. Well, at least Count Floyd promises so. John Candy drugs women & turns them into his personal pussycats until they rebel or at least he has to act like they're clawing him, when they couldn't be bothered to even paw.* close to 2 1/2 stars

Brass Eye: Sex *Bad aids vs. good aids, the mucking about homosexual scandal of her majesty's royal navy ,the debasement of an American politician, an asexual man up a pole watching pornography, beating off assailants, Peter Stringfellow, & a giant whore on the loose.* 3 stars

=== Geraldo Rivera: Hate Mongers (1988)

*Skinhead smackdown smashes Geraldo in the schnoz.* 1 infamous star (not of David)

[Note: Geraldo has always loved pouring fuel onto a fire. Not for justly reasons, either. Here it would appear so, to the people of the time period, but fast forward to today & Geraldo is standing among "Black Lives Matter" protestors & telling them that racism no longer exists in America.

Geraldo: race baiter, troublemaker, & obvious fraudulent media manipulator of any era he's in.]

(edit, years later:

I still think Geraldo is a douche, but I've woken up how much of an idiot I was for kind of casually being apathetic to & half way supporting groups like "Black Lives Matter."

I think most everyone has if they don't have "tribal" interests or are a "race blind" moron who'll be dragged into the streets while trying to high five a "friend" of color during a riot or "peaceful" protest someday & be treated to a beating similar to the one Reginald Denny received on CNN in LA in 92 after the Rodney King verdict?)

================================================================================

Mysteries From Beyond the Other Dominion w/ Franklin Ruehl *Eerie coincidences between the Kennedy & Lincoln assassinations. I like the true nerdiness of this early Sci-Fi Channel show. If it were a part of a nerd culture channel or website, today, it would have faux nerd hipsters ironically doing it & not the earnest weirdness of Ruehl & company.* 3 stars

--- Found Footage Fest:

*Special Delivery: "The bitch, the bitch, the bitch," the female dog is having puppies.* 2 1/2 stars

*Something Big: "The first nude pop video" might "offend" as it warns, but the mostly tasteful nude images of big breasted women aren't as obscene as the Euro-sleaze leadsinger's crooning & 70s porno mustache.* 2 1/2 stars

*The Appointment... With Death: You'll never see Hawaii, if you keep smartin' off to the monotone voiced angel of death premonitions.* either 1 or 3 stars

*I'm A Spoon: Women of all body types used to search for that perfect fit, but eventually gave up to the potato sack look of sweatpants w/ sassy slogans on the ass.* 2 stars

*I Gotta Go!: When you get that feeling way down below. A sanitized version of the uh oh diarrhea song from Steve Martin's Parent Trap. There's no Barney the Dinosaur to help the toddlers & kids sing along & poop, but there's a chimp taking a shit (for giggles).* 3turds

----------------------------------

Grandpa Munster's SuperScarySaturday on TBS Superstation: King Kong vs. Godzilla the Debate *Since neither monster can talk, pro wrestling personalities, of the 80s, are doing the cheerleading. Motormouth evangelist look-a-like, w/ a tennis racket, Jim Cornette, preaches for Godzilla, says that his monster is younger than the "dying of old age" King Kong, and he can breathe fire. Lynyrd Skynyrd roadie wannabe Michael P.S. Hayes, standing up for his hairy hero, boasts that Kong can swat planes while still holding onto a babe. I call it a tie. So, would any other fan of both monsters.* 3 stars

--- Occult Demon Cassette Presents: "Exposing the Satanic Web" 1990 (Satanic Panic VHS)

*Yesterday Satanism, today radical Islam, tomorrow extraterrestrial orgasms?

Who knows what the future holds, but the religious right will most likely be there to spread their brand of disinformation.

People really couldn't tell that the crayon drawings of occult rituals were done by adults w/ agendas?

Motley Crue images pop up constantly in these old scare films.

Motley Crue obviously weren't a threat to America's teenagers. They're now bloated white trash rock has-beens trying to get their near elderly groupies to still flash their saggy tits!

Those women didn't end up sacrifices of the devil. They probably had about five dirty young'uns that never got sacrificed either, 'cause Satanic Panic was just that panic that meant nothing.

Nerdy teens who played Dungeons & Dragons didn't role play murder half the parent population in the U.S. No, they're still harmless adult nerds.

The reformed high-priest of Satanism turned Christian now confessing his former dark powers & deeds.

Is it okay that he claims to have committed horrible acts because he's asked for forgiveness from God?

Shouldn't he be in jail? That's proof that he's full of shit. That all of the scare-mongers of these videos are full of shit, & have taken a simple fantasy game, a rebellious youth music that they don't enjoy or understand, & victimless boredom in juvenile property crime through graffiti & tried to turn it into a scare tactic tool to push people fearfully into the arms of the major cult in America, the Christian religions.

Satan obviously wasn't as savvy as these evangelicals who still have the ear of their cult, after all these years, while Motley Crue & Freddy Krueger are no longer being fed virgins at the altar of willing black magic fiends & disturbed teenagers.*

(edit, years later:

Man listen to me. Full on liberal apathy & cynicism disguised as trying to be clever.

I still slightly chuckle at the hysteria of the 80s Satanic Panic.

but to believe Islam isn't an obvious threat to the west is to be in denial or downright actually evil... no hysteria. but truth.

the type of person I was then would rather ignore the truth, & claim it was islamophobia delusion while looking at hipster blogs like dangerousmindsdotnet for the latestdug up piece of pop culture from a bygone era to be mocked

then getting my "news" from the Daily Show w/ it's highly cut & edited slant leaning the views towards an agenda while claiming bias everywhere else & only everwhere else...

I can't say I ever saw any metal heads hold a Satanic animal sacrifice orgy, but I have seen real life footage of hordes of muslims flooding Europe & the after effects in the news

hard evidence of rapes, terrorist bombings / shootings / stabbings / hackings / huge vehicle homicide of dozens / beheadings / literal fucking jihad...

not scaremongering, you blind hipster dope (me, several years ago) but all out war on the civilization that once provided your shits & giggles & safety shelter to enjoy them in w/out getting gutted for being an infidel)

1 star

=======================================================

People Are Talking w/ Tom Bergeron: James Randi Debunks Faith Healer (youtube) *Tom Bergeron sits looking at clips of extremely funny faith healings. One in particular where a fake had played the role of both a crippled man & a woman w/ bad ovaries. This could be America's Funniest Home videos, but sadly Randi points out that the placebo effect of these dramatically staged acts do harm when the believers don't seek real medical help from actual doctors instead of faith healers.* 3 stars

City Confidential: Rock Springs, Deadly Shootout in the Wild West *"Cowboy Caligula."* more than 2 1/2 stars

Viper: Past Tense *Amnesia love affairs, brainwashed agents of assassination, & chance collisions of the heavens. Plays like something noir that would be in Frank Miller's Sin City.* close to 3

Forever Knight: Cherry Blossoms *Vampire detective versus Chinese mafia seeking to slay a wounded witness. Wrongly accused vampire versus elderly Chinese acupuncturist seeking revenge against the vampire who slayed his mother 60 years before.*

between 2 1/2 & 3 stars

The Greatest American Hero: The Best Desk Scenario *Fumbling the ball near the endzone or too many cooks trying to read the anarchist's cookbook.* 2 1/2 stars

Look Around You: Computers *In Bournesmouth, one can bibble or bobble if they're beardless or bearded, but not if they're brandishing a petticoat (female).* close to 3 stars

The Prisoner: Hammer Into Anvil *Creates an unhinged melody.* 3 stars

Farscape: Bone To Be Wild *The old routine of one "submarine" silently hiding from another's radar. Deepspace Donner Party bone eater massacre. Johnny Appleseed "Frankenstein's Monster" look-a-like or Swamp Thing stranded on an asteroid. Our hero Crichton needs to be sensitive to "plant phobia." The spiritual blue alien lady Zan (Xan?) is actually a sentient plant. Captain Ahab under scrutiny. Babysitting a weaponized junior Leviathan (a Death Star in a diaper).* 3 stars

---- Night Visions w/ Henry Rollins:

The Passenger List: A little twilight zone twist & a lot of 9-11 era zeitgeist of airline tragedy grief.* between 2 1/2 & 3 stars

The Bokor: Bayou medical school morphine junkies, grotesque medical cadaver, & a voodoo curse.* more than 2 1/2 stars

Rollins: Puts on a stale attempt at Rod Serling.* between 1 1/2 & 2 stars

------------------------------------

Uncharted Zone: Fifty Dollar Boots - Johnny Fire *50 dollar budget quality black & white video for a rockabilly crooner & his 50 dollar boot wearing chick guitar player.* close to 2 1/2 stars

Beavis & Butthead: Jennifer Tryin - Happier *Gen X drug store despair, Beavis taking diarrhea medicine & pooping a brick that he keeps in his sock drawer, & Butthead wanting to live in denial that he ever heard Beavis talk about it.* 3 stars w/ riffing close to 2 1/2 stars w/out

Justified: Season 1 Episode 6 *"There's more than smart" & there's more than art. Especially Adolf Hitler's shitty art. It's a nebulous or abstract concept.* close to 3 stars

True Detective: Haunted Houses *Still life. Nearer to silence (unholy ghosts) than God.* 3 stars

Hannibal: Trou Normand *Losing time opening doors, unearthing graves, & making monuments to the desecrated.* 3 stars

Penn & Teller Bullshit!: Talking to the Dead & ESP *Party tricks & charades for suckers & the sad.* 3 stars

James Randi's Fiery Takedown of a Psychic Fraud *An admitted wizard takes a lethal overdose of homeopathic medicine to prove a cruel farce.* more than 2 1/2 stars

Ripley's Believe It Or Not! w/ Jack Palance: Episode 3 (1985) *Giant 1980s supercomputers are used to photoshop the Tibetan god-king out of Shangri La, like an impractical automotive 5th wheel or discarded apple peel (peeled by an Edison style mass industrial invention), & placed, by 2001 Hal's robo-cousin, out into the sun to purify like a baby orangutan or an eskimo mummy. Also pre-CitySlickers Curly's gold* 2 Fair

Fargo: Buridan's Ass *Breach in a white out or bludgeoned like fish out of water.* 3 stars

"XTRO" (1983) *A deeply disturbed British schoolboy's estranged daddy returns from his absentee fatherhood vacation on H.R. Geiger's homeworld after traumatizing the boy w/ his "Fire in the Sky" style abrupt bon voyage goodbye. Often tonally too whimsical to be taken seriously, while at other times being astonishingly creepy.* between 2 & 2 1/2 stars or more

Tales from the Crypt: The Reluctant Vampire *Mr. Longtooth (Malcom McDowell) isn't a glamourous Dracula. He's a cowardly nightwatchman at a failing blood bank. Can he win the heart of his mousey love interest, at the blood bank, w/out biting her neck? Will he find the courage to stand up to his bully of a boss (Cheers' George Wendt) or will he fall prey to a weird looking Van Helsing?* Decent

"Saturday Night Dead" KYW-TV 3 Philadelphia (February 1, 1986) *"The maddening minx of movie-dom" Stella, a redheaded Rhonda Shear look-a-like glamour doll, traipses around her ghoulish horror set kiddingly admitting to bedding, on her monster talking bed, the Philadelphia Eagles football team. She is in dire need of a butler & wants him to be as hunky as Sylvester Stallone's Rambo. Looks like Philly had a pretty decent version of Elvira or Rhonda. Not bad.* 2 1/2 stars

--- Monstervision w/ Joe Bob Briggs: Waxwork

*Drive-In Totals: 43 dead bodies.... 0 nekkid breasts (sorry).. 1 Live severed hand.. .African Voodoo Face Painting.. French S & M.. Fang Sprouting.. Bat Shooting.. Raw Meat Gobbling.. Sword Fighting.. Strangling.. Stabbing.. Head Butting.. Ax to the Back... Death by Fire.. Gratuitous Dialogue w/ Loud Music.. Werewolf Fu.. Vampire Fu.. Mummy Fu.. Zombie Fu.. Senior Citizen Fu..

*Joe Bob says this isn't a haunted house movie, it's a "nasty" house movie, like his grandma would always say, "That's nasty!"

*Burt Reynolds for Liz Taylor perfume (Ladies, don't wear anything that gives Burt a smell boner).

*Songs 4 Life Christian mix CD (90s, the era that bland white people safe religious music w/out any gospel soul or passion reared its dorky head).

*CNN has Bill Clinton's sworn testimony in the shadow of impeachment (ah, the Lewinsky era, we survived that.).

*Rent Matthew MuhConUhHey! & Skeet Ulrich, tonight! (not male escorts. a shitty VhS tape of the movie "Newton Boys").

*Pure Reggae mix cd 1-800 ad (A island jam collection featuring the theme to Cops "Bad Boys" plus Apache Indian's "Boom Shakalak"... pass the herb & turn it up, mon!).

*Joe Bob's Jailbreak w/ Reno the Mail Girl: Talk of Joe Bob's jealousy because Reno might have dated / made love to a midget instead of Joe Bob & also Reno gets a love poem from a jailbird in a Mojave prison unit in Arizona.*

*Carpenters Love Songs mix cd ad. Being a kid in the 80s & 90s, & not an adult in the 70s, I only had vague knowledge of who Karen Carpenter was & that she had died tragically young. Anytime, I would see these ads w/ their hazy cloud aesthetics along w/ faded quality videos of Karen singing her mostly melancholy songs, I would get the creeps.*

*Waxwork: Remember 2011's "Cabin in the Woods"?... Well, Joss Whedon's "genius" turning of a monster/slasher movie conventions on its head script wasn't that original. In the 80s, somebody else did it first. This monster mayhem flick, featuring almost every creature & horror character known, is set in a wax museum instead of a cabin in the woods. Starring the teenage boys from Gremlins & Twin Peaks plus Return of the Living Dead 2 along with their 80s valley girl girlfriends. The main villain is legendary not so good movie & tv show actor David Warner (the movies/shows not being so good. Warner is always great).*

between 2 & 2 1/2 stars for Waxwork, more than 2 1/2 for Joe Bob, & close to 2 for the ads

----------------------------------------------------

TNT 100% Weird: The Twonky *"Whenever I think of women, I think of French fried potatoes." A very nervous man's wife leaves town, gifting him his first television set to keep him company. This is when tv's were brand new & confusing to man. It didn't help that this particular tv was unlike any other in that it could work the magic of a genie or a futuristic robot.* close to 3 stars

Wizards & Warriors: The Dungeon of Death *"Badgers, we don't need no stinkin' badgers." What we got is a ragtag rescue squad of a Renaissance fair Clint Eastwood type, a carnival strong man, a high wire walking hottie, & one of the munchkins from the Wizard of Oz. Trouble is there's a mole.* close to 3 stars

--- Sci Fi Channel (1993) Feature Film: The Clone Master

*A pair of alien hands find a time capsule buried in the sand. The date says 1993. Inside is a bottle of head & shoulders. Our great legacy, dandruff shampoo...

*95 cents a minute hotline to find out what's coming up on the Sci Fi channel's schedule? Wow, wouldn't a 99 cent, one time purchase, TV Guide not suffice? That's phone sex level of horny to know when the next episode of the original Star Trek is airing.

*Sci Fi had great station bumpers. I'll try to describe this one... it has a picturesque set lakehouse w/ the phone off the receiver "hello, are you there?" & geese flying against a newly alien earth skyline featuring a ring planet between earth & the moon.

*Extremely nerdy voice over "Emmy Award winning Battlestar Galactica, weeknights."

*Beatles Live 1964 in London for the first time on VHS or BETA

*Curly haired cute model "All those holes. All that protection." Science strikes again. Always Maxi Pads w/ new technology. New as in holes. I have a hole in my soul from all the sanitary napkin girly confessional commercials that I've had to endure all my life.

*A generic couple enjoy a generic romantic evening over generic pasta & generic white wine while listening to "Easy 70's" a generic mix cd of 70s soft rock like Crystal Gale & Kenny Loggins among others. He leaves w/out sex. Because this type of music makes one sterile.

*Vintage ad for Craftmatic adjustable beds. The old couple is giddy to talk to their over the phone Craftmatic salesperson. I'm giddy too for my memories of these ads. though the actual beds were usually in the homes of some sick acquaintance of my parents&grandparents

*"Never miss another favorite program." VCR Voice, the voice operated vcr remote control. Pssss... VCR Voice... record Skinemax & those early morning workout shows w/ the ladies in spandex....

*Smokey the Bear is talked about by a kid who makes him seem almost mythical. Maybe in 3,000 years, when our culture is long forgotten & misunderstood, they'll find something about Smokey the Bear & wonder what the fuck was up w/ us having a cartoon bear to warn humans about forest fire safety & natural resource preservation responsibility.

*"Can dinosaur cloning really happen? The truth behind the fiction." A Sci Fi special on Jurassic Park. It can & did, but tune in to Alex Jones InFoWars or Jesse Ventura's new show on Glen Beck's Blaze channel to find out.

*"Dark Shadows" weekdays on Sci Fi. Now, that's a weekday soap opera that I would sink my teeth in to. Someone get me my Bon Bons & my Moo Moo...

*1 800 ad for Sci Fi Classic home video's "Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy."

*Back on earth, Frankie Valli & the 4 Seasons on every music listening format known to man. That's as advanced as we are....

*Speaking of identical twins & cloning... Elvis, in his 68 Comeback Special, decked out in his black leather spacesuit... Get a collector's copy. Copy... wink wink. Elvis, often imitated, never duplicated except in utero or however it go...

*Classic kitchen knife displays of incredible feats by the World Class Ginsu knife. Showoff All the other dull culinary utensils got Ginsu off & murdered him & buried his stainless steel body under the goal post in Food Network's Iron Chef Kitchen Stadium.

*Walter Koenig for a huge collection of Star Trek (Original & Next Generation) themes,sound fx, & a 6 minute bridge sequence. Sound fx, okay... maybe... a 6 minute bridge sequence... alright, I can sort of see that... still, it's nerdom bordering insanity.

*K-Tel Conway Twitty videos. Not the right station. Not as much as Sci Fi isn't a rhinestone sequened audience as it's not an audience where they can relate to a hillbilly heart-throb's songs about sleeping w/ a horde of women. Live long & amorously prosperous.

*"The majesty & might of Marvel leaps off of the page & onto the screen" shows clips of 70s Hulk tv show & one of the 70s Spider Man tv movies. Modern Marvel fanboys would scoff at the words majesty & might being used for these classics. "They don't even have after credits sequences or universe building." They do have Stan Lee hosting the Mighty Marvel Marathon on Sci Fi 1993. Sixteen years before Iron Man....

*Clone Master: It's a good clone movie when the existential grief of being a clone does not fully get in the way of the clone capers, clone antics, & clone based comedy. Also, Cold War era conpirators could get away w/ a lot thanks to government secrecy not allowing anyone to share information to know what the hell was going on in different sections of all their hush hush top secret work like cloning.*

3 stars for Sci Fi's bumpers, close to 3 for the ads, & 2 1/2 stars for Clone Master

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The She Creature *Kooky age regression hypnotism to spook squares & Eve-era mer-monster to slaughter them.* 3 stars w/ riffing 2 1/2 stars w/out

Nathan On Your Side: Talking to the Animals *non-confrontational dialogue w/ bed wetting cat.* more than 2 stars

The Cinema Snob: Woodchipper Massacre *No Fargo woodchipper action. No massacre. More terrible like Poland invaded by Hitler, only w/out any of that massacre. Just the terrible.* 2 1/2 for Snob

Conan O'Brien - In the Year 2000: Taco Bell 2000 *A "chilling" glimpse into the prophecy of Charmin toilet paper's involvement w/ the bowel dooming food chain.* 3 stars

A & E presents An Evening at the Improv: Norm MacDonald (1991) *Homeless dog owners & backseat blues.* close to 3 stars

HBO Not Necessarily the News: The Spork Episode (1983) *Mr. T. imporium. Panda pest control. Des Moines pudding disaster. Light beer for fat drunks. Rich Hall's weekly sniglet words: scrit is anything that has sat in the same spot for 50 years... yinkel is anybody that combs their hair over their bald spot thinking that nobody will notice... spork the combination spoon fork device (did he invent that term? wow, cool, if so)... furbling is the act of walking through a maze of ropes at the airport or bank even though you're the only one in line (haaa)... porkus non grata is the squashed piece of bacon at the bottom of the package.. lactomangulation is having to open a milkcarton from the opposite side because of one side's malfunction.. carperpetuation is the act of running over a piece of string w/ a vacuum 4 or 5 times before picking it up & inspecting it & then putting it back down for one last attempt.*

decent though dated

"Best of the Worst Star Search Auditions" (youtube) *"Let me do my thang to ya!"  You'd never see a bearded lady singing Patsy Cline on America's Got Talent.* 3 stars

Insomniac w/ Dave Attell: San Francisco *If you come to this frontier town, eventually you're gonna ask yourself "am I a fog rider, a pickle pilot, or a proud baby mudfoot?"* 3 stars

--- Memory Hole:

*Cranial Deformity Dance Dad: I'm tired of spaghetti. But you always like sketti.* 3 stars

*Clinton Torture: Bill's bubbles is just tryna give you kisses.* 2 1/2 stars

*I'm On The T.V.: Been waitin' for you to turn me on.* more than 2 1/2 stars

*Rap 4 Ca$h: A school teacher, of 25 years, will do anything for a raise.* 1 star

*Island Of Original Ideas Mirror Effect: an idiot's idea of an interesting illusion.* folly

======================================================

Penn & Teller Bullshit!: Creationism & The Bible, Fact or Fiction *Pissing on one's own feet while the ground crumbles beneath forming a crater of disbelief. Leaving one in critical need & clinging to the causal or a creed.* Folly?

James Randi Debunks An Astrologer *"Everybody believes that they have a sense of humor." - Stephen Fry who doesn't believe that the astrologer accurately judged his friend Hugh Laurie.* close to decent

Forbidden Transmission: World Bizarre *freewheeling babel.* more than 2 1/2 stars

Weird TV: Burning Man - Early Years *Survival issues, sexuality, porta potty use, & potato gun fun.*

between 2 & 2 1/2 stars

"Dawn of the Mummy" *Classic Universal horror theme grave robbed by Euro-sleaze exploitation schlock vandals.* 2 1/2 stars

PBS presents American Experience: The Lobotomist *"Ambition makes you look pretty ugly." -Paranoid Android- A look at the doctor who tried to turn a grotesque medical procedure into a McDonald's style franchise value menu item forthe severe to the even the slightly mentally ill.* either zero or 3 stars

Alien Sex Fiend - "Now, I'm Feeling Zombiefied" *Face is caked white, you see a dead rat & you take a bite...* 2 1/2 stars

"You Spin Me Round" (Literal video version) *Freaky pirate all tied up (in himself).* close to 3 for the literal 3 for the actual

Uncharted Zone: "Hurry, There's A Hurricane" - Ken Manning *Hold on to your hats & to each other.* close to 3 stars

--- Reel Wild Cinema w/ Sandra Bernhard: Lunatics on the Loose:

*Sandra wants to go to third base w/ Antonio Banderas, her Aztec fantasy...

*Curse of the Aztec Mummy: Beehive hairdo damsels in distress, rubber bat attack, crotch crawling spider, & hideous ghoul doing the rigor-mortis-arms trance step dance*

*Sandra promises a movie with bad dubbing, coming up, "So don't go away." For the bad dubbing, I'll definitely stay.

*America's Most Wanted & Top Cops on USA network. A one two punch of justice & dullness.

*A soccer ball toting toddler wakes his middle aged dad up & his dad needs a small pouch sized doze of Folgers coffee. I bet this man can't even take a morning shit in peace.

*A disembodied red lipsticked mouth for Rembrandt whitening toothpaste. "2 shades whiter" promised. All the varying shades of teeth color from white to off white to yellow to grey to diseased orangish brown to black... Amusing memory of Mitch Hedberg's tartar sauce joke

*The Psychic Solution w/ a very self aware ad where they parody "bad psychic" hotline call centers complete w/ dart board for predictions & vanity mirror distractions during calls.

*Sandra now promises stock Civil War footage w/ clips from a nudist colony. Robert E. Lee is rolling over in his grave in his slave mistress's underwear that he demanded to be buried in.

*The Monster of Camp Sunshine: Thank that "scientist in the sky" for water pollution & sexual deviancy.*

*Quirky-reggae-whitebread-feelin' Long John Silver fast food joint on the beach commercial where there are tropical birds inside the establishment (sure the health inspector likes that notion) & couples relax in the waves drinking supersized sodas in foam cups (I bet those don't get put in the proper trash bin & instead float about the waves onto the beach)

*Crocodile Dundee vs. Ogre of Revenge of the Nerds & Bloodsport in a station wagon chase....

*Kenny Kingston "legendary psychic" & sleazy old school Hollywood showman look-a-like w/ love advice for lonely yuppies who go through everyday being horny & instead of acting on it & taking chances they wait for over the phone voodoo advice...

*Dweezil Zappa is Sandra's guest: Not sure if it's his rainbow colored girly liquor drink talking but Dweezil let it slip that he might believe that Aztec civlization dates back at least a million years....

*Sandra wants t.v. trying to scare people instead of always endearing itself to them.

*Bloody Pit of Horror: More tortured by the swingers he performs medieval cruelty upon, the Crimson Executioner gets caught up in his own scarlet devices.*

*A crystal ball gazing clairvoyant, w/ pink hair, predicts that Snoop Doggy Dog, Bush, & Dennis Miller will be at the 1996 MTV Video Awards. Pumpkins will also be smashed.

*USA capitalizes on the Unabomber headlines w/ their own original movie version...

*Sandra would have no sympathy for a girlfriend caught in a devious bondage trap...

*Oath of Green Blood: Audience participation required in taking a vial of verdant liquid that might make one vile or vivacious.

*Star Trek's original resident black boundaries breaker is sadly selling her soul as a spokesperson for a psychic hotline. This one even makes the claim that's often been used as a joke against psychics "Lottery winner predicted." Yep, "it happened."

*Coming attractions: Scream of the Demon Lover... Giant from the Unknown (awakened after hundreds of years & wearing conquistador armor. so, it's the Spanish to blame)... The Crawling Thing from Planet 13 promises to attack audience members (nice gimmick ploy)...

3 for Sandra, 3 for the shorts, & close to 2 for the ads

----------------------------------------------------------

"Sting of Death" -1965- *The Hunchback of the Everglades suffers a squelching at the hands of Florida Gator co-ed swingers & marine scientists. He goes all man-o-war on their jiggly jellyfish jive asses.* 2 stars

Baywatch Nights: Pursuit *Stinks of 90s sleaze/cheese. Says "Nights" but can't help in filming over half the show on the pretty beaches during the day. Featuring a couple of my boyhood tv crushes, Carol Alt & Angie Harmon.* between 1 1/2 & 2 stars

Beavis & Butthead: Varga - "Greed" *Beavis has the great idea that someone should invent something to watch music videos on (a television). Butthead's great idea is Beavis should shut up.* 3 w/riffing 2 1/2 w/out

Troma presents "Blondes Have More Guns" *Basic Instinct parodies haven't aged well, but Troma satire silliness is timeless.* between 2 & 2 1/2 stars

Penn & Teller Bullshit!: The Business of Love, Yoga, Tantric Sex, Etc. & Sex, Sex, Sex *Follow made up rules, follow hokey signs, follow shady email-spam links, & fuck if any of it happens to work.* 3 stars

--- Found Footage Fest:

*Video Dating: Looking for a goddess. A goddess is a woman, any woman, all women. No fatties!* 3 stars

*Sexual Harassment Comedy: Don't say anything, ever, because you're an obvious dickhead.* 1 star or close to 3

*Courtship vs. Dating: Don't get hung up on sweaty beefcakes. Acquire the fire to be a hard to get Christian cock-tease.* 2 1/2 stars

------------------------------------

David Hasselhoff - "Hooked On A Feeling" (Literal Video Version) *Hoff w/ "wiener" out & high on believing. "Please throw a fish at me!"* more than decent w/riffing or close to decent w/out

Nathan On Your Side: Sex In Advertising & Penis Extension *What turns you on? Please tell Santa so that we can market correctly.*

2 1/2 stars

Occult Demon Cassette presents "How To Be Cool At Parties" w/ Malcom Jamal Warner (1986) *Anybody can act like a jackass.* 2 1/2 stars

Pee Wee's Playhouse - Adult Humor & Innuendo (youtube) *Being a Spring chicken, I wasn't spry enough to see just how subliminal Saturday mornings really were.* 3 stars

Mystery Science Theater 3000: Pod People *Smuckers presents movies

A) Redneck poachers run into 'The Thing From Another World' B) Lil' Opie & his new pet Alf... or C) Ace of Base's tragic vacation in the Catskill Mtns. Joel says "It stinks! *okay hand gesture*"*

3 stars w/riffing between 1 1/2 & 2 w/out

Herman's Head (Pilot Episode) *Clever premise pulled off effectively. Made even better by the voice of Lisa Simpson & another Simpsons' legend Hank Azaria's charm.* close to 3 stars

Comics Only: Employee of the Week - Hank Gallo (1990) *Talent scout who searches the gay leather bar scene.* 2 1/2 stars

--- Rachel Sweet - The Sweet Life (The Comedy Channel circa the early 1990s):

*Lou Diamond Phillips makes fun of greasy haired Johnny Depp

*Jon Stewart impersonates a pretentious French director

*Rachel Sweet is a quirky raven-haired petite cutey poking fun at the Cosmo magazine's version of a girly girl

*Naked centerfold spread of David Hasselhoff is mocked by Rachel...

*Classic "Cow Cow Boogie" film short, that I just saw on Night Flight, is sang along to karaoke style by Rachel... she's definitely sweet

*Quotes: An unexamined life is not worth living - Plato... Time eases all things -Sophocles Get over it - Rachel Sweet... (cute)

more than 2 stars

---------------------------

#The Haunted #Jerry springer #Ray Comfort #Penn and Teller #everything is terrible #good bad flicks #siskel and ebert #night flight #dog police #james randi #beavis and butthead #tv carnage #the last dragon #shotgun #hospital massacre #cannon films #video wasteland #sctv #brass eye #geraldo rivera #mystery science theater 3000 #mst3k #found footage fest #grandpa munster #satanic panic #tom bergeron #forever knight #the greatest american hero #the prisoner #farscape

[mayacatmaster]

Uninstalling any kind of preach, teach, built people’s-inner-children blind-obey and going to kiss any kind of dark-tyranny-ruler’s-ass,…:

*** *** ***

Please be patient. Your alignment with Source and as an alignment-deliberate-creator will be restored soon.

*** *** ***

Any kind of preach, teach, built people’s-inner-children blind-obey and going to kiss any kind of dark-tyranny-ruler’s-ass, …:

Is a Man-made-virus.

*** *** ***

Because your children is a human not a robot. So, please...  Don't indoctrinate your children and your inner-children. *** *** *** No matter of it’s religion-belief-system, morality-belief-system, political-belief-system, education-belief-system, or ‘so call’ saints, teacher, gurus, or your elders, parents…:

*** *** ***

No matter it’s use the name of “God”, Use the name of man-made-moral, Use the name of country,  Use the name of family,  Use the name of egoism,  *** *** *** Between your “God” and my “God”, kills each others,  Between your man-made-moral and my man-made-moral, kills each others,  Between your country and my country, kills each others,  Between your family and my family, kills each others,  Between your body and my body , kills each others,  *** *** ***

So…:

Seek not the approval from your outer-world, no matter of it’s who or what…: *** *** ***

Seek not the approval of society.

Nor the approval of your mother.

Nor the approval of Abraham.

Seek not the approval of anyone.

Seek the connection with your Own Inner Being, and let the presence or the absence of your Inner Being be your Guiding Star.

And you will always be in the right place, under any and all conditions. ~ Abraham

*** *** *** *** *** ***

Via and thanks “Live the Joy & Abraham”

*** *** *** *** *** *** "Nature"(Tao；Ma-at；Logos; Source) never did betray the heart that loved her. *** *** *** Follow the force that is guiding the whole universe is in you.  Pledge allegiance to your "Source"(God; True Self; Tao; Logos),  everything is done! ~Huangdi Yinfujing 「觀天之道，執天之行，盡矣！」: 黃帝陰符經； *** *** *** You are never along or helpless. The force that is guiding the whole universe is in you too! *** *** *** Those who flow as "Life"(Tao; True Self; Source) flows know they need no other force. ~Lao tzu *** *** *** You have all the intelligence within you. TRUST, ALLOW and only listen to your own HEART! *** *** *** Use your own light and return to the Source of "Light"(Tao; True Self; Wisdom of Universal). This is called practicing eternity. ~Lao Tzu *** *** *** Always listen to your own heart, even if it is against what your family, society, culture of religion is telling you! *** *** *** If you see all the star swirls with the Big-Dipper,  Hundreds of millions of years and hundreds of millions of years,  No matter it is ancient and modern or east or west. *** *** *** It is through watching the "Cycles" of Nature that we more fully understand the cycles of our own lives. *** *** *** Four things cannot be long hidden; the sun, the moon, the Big-Dipper and the “Truth”(True Self; Tao; Logos; Ma-at; Dharma; Source).  *** *** ***

A lie doesn't become truth, wrong doesn't become right and evil doesn't become good, just because it's accepted by a majority. *** *** *** The truth is the truth even if no one believes it, and a lie is a lie even if everyone believes it. *** *** *** A bunch of weak people, even in numbers, aren't strong. Get a whole bunch of confused people together and see how much clarity comes out of it. In other words, you just can't add one more confused person to the pot, and expect to get any more clarity... One --- standing outside of the confused group --- who is clear, is more powerful than a million who are confused. ~Abraham *** *** ***  Everyone could get all mixed up all at once and there could not be enough negative discord to stop this Earth from spinning in its orbit. The Well-Being has been pointed toward you and all that you are living, so profoundly for so long, it can't go wrong. ~Abraham *** *** ***  Do you know what the dominate reason for anyone who has a worthiness issue is ? They have plenty of negative emotion and they're willing to put up with it. Source is rooting for them, and they are rooting against themselves. ~Abraham *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** Via and thanks “Abraham-Hicks: Inspirational Quotes” *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** Happiness, peace is  what you think,  what you say,  and what you doing are in harmony with the essence of your natural being, in align with your "True Self GPS"( The Global Positioning System of your inner Cosmic wisdom). Maybe you can say:" I am on my own path and Universe is my guide." *** *** *** EVERYTHING is cooperating with YOU,  when YOU are cooperating with your "True Self"(Tao；God). *** *** *** Those in alignment Follow the order of "Source"(Tao；True Self；Logos), they Follow the way of "Source"(Tao；True Self；Logos), they Follow the timing of "Source"(Tao；True Self；Logos) and they Follow the design of "Source"(Tao；True Self；Logos).  They are calm; They are clear;  They are real. Having arrived at the "Root"(Tao；True Self；Brahman),  They are never confused by the branches. *** *** ***

[mayacatmaster]

By understanding the Laws of the Universe,...So those who are the most defiant and those who are the most rebellious and those who are litigious ... and those who are the most pushing against the most things are those who are adding to the Vortex in the most... ~Abraham

*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** Thanks for “Loving Out Loud & Abraham” *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***

Q: In terms of society, when people want to change things and improve things, how best is it for us collectively to try to do that without bumping up against the resistance? A: By understanding the Laws of the Universe, by understanding that if no one knew anything (and most of them don't) that it would be working out just fine because the harder they push against something, the more they ask for its improvement. So those who are the most defiant and those who are the most rebellious and those who are litigious and those that are the most unhappy and those who are the most pushing against the most things are those who are adding to the Vortex in the most; they are the predominant creators of the new and improved. And the reason that they're so agitated (that's why they're called agitators) is because they are holding themselves apart from the very thing that they have been asking for. So the way you deal with it is by understanding it, by not pushing against them because they're pushing against something.  Q: So world peace is never going to be achieved, do you think? A: Sameness will never be achieved, and everyone wanting the same thing in the world at the same time will never be achieved. And usually what people mean when they speak of world peace is that one idea will be floated that everyone will agree with and then there will be no reason for discord. And we say there is already no reason for discord - just don't look at things you don't like.  Q: That's wonderful, thanks. A: Really good.  ~Abraham

*** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***

Follow the force that is guiding the whole universe is in you.  Pledge allegiance to your "Source"(God; True Self; Tao; Logos),  everything is done! ~Huangdi Yinfujing 「觀天之道，執天之行，盡矣！」: 黃帝陰符經； *** *** *** You are never along or helpless. The force that is guiding the whole universe is in you too! *** *** *** Those who flow as "Life"(Tao; True Self; Source) flows know they need no other force. ~Lao tzu *** *** *** You have all the intelligence within you. TRUST, ALLOW and only listen to your own HEART! *** *** *** Use your own light and return to the Source of "Light"(Tao; True Self; Wisdom of Universal). This is called practicing eternity. ~Lao Tzu *** *** *** Always listen to your own heart, even if it is against what your family, society, culture of religion is telling you! *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** Thanks for “ONEness” *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** I walk the path of the ancient "Oneness"(Tao；True Self; Maat), Nature is my church. Just like trees, cats, birds, stars, moon, sun, my religion is same "Oneness"(Tao；True Self; Maat). *** *** *** Life is "Tao"(True Self；Brahman) back to itself. I observed the sun, moon, stars orbit operation life.  *** When I see the sun , moon, stars function by "Tao"(True Self；God). it's same , when I see the four seasons change. it's same , when I see the men, animals, plants function by "Tao"(True Self；God) *** *** *** In this-now-here, in this such moment. In this changing world of social and cultural dogma. Has eternal life standards. Eternal spiritual compass.  Eternal-Guiding-Principle of Llife. Operate in all things within life functions. Government by "Tao"(Source; True Self; God; Allah). ***  When we watching & witness the sun , moon, stars function by "Tao"(True Self；God). When we watching & witness those operate in all things within life functions. ***  Summer and winter seasons of life, I observed the operation of orbit replacement.  In ancient times, today, around the world, the eternal truths of life, is "One"(Tao；True Self；God；Allah). ***  Remember, the “Truth”(Tao; True Self; Maat; Logos ;According to the law that governs the universe) is unshakable - it is unmovable. It stays still and calm and firmly rooted, even when you are in the state of denial. Its place in this creation is the highest! *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** Thanks for “Journey to Love” *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** Times change but the “Truth”(Tao; True Self; Maat ; Logos ; According to the law that governs the universe) do not. *** *** *** The "Source"(Tao; Maat；Logos ; True Self) has always been same, in ancient and modern, in east and west, in any time-space. *** *** *** Everything you see has its "Roots"(Source; True Self；Tao) in the unseen world. The forms may change, yet the "Essence"(Source; True Self；Tao) remains the same "ONE"(Source; Tao；True Self；God). *** *** *** All Souls were created in the "beginning"(Source; Tao; True Self; God) and are finding their way back to whence they came. ~Edgar Cayce *** *** *** Abraham always says alignment trumps everything.  Alignment means alignment with Source"(Tao: True Self; Maat; Logos; Dharma) - the same energy that create worlds, the energy that consistently makes the sun comes out every blessed day, the same energy that makes the earth spins perfectly in its orbits, the same energy that orchestras the cells of our body to work perfectly to keep our functioning at an optimal level and so on.  *** *** *** A bunch of weak people, even in numbers, aren't strong. Get a whole bunch of confused people together and see how much clarity comes out of it. In other words, you just can't add one more confused person to the pot, and expect to get any more clarity... One --- standing outside of the confused group --- who is clear, is more powerful than a million who are confused. ~Abraham *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** Everyone could get all mixed up all at once and there could not be enough negative discord to stop this Earth from spinning in its orbit. The Well-Being has been pointed toward you and all that you are living, so profoundly for so long, it can't go wrong. ~Abraham *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** You don't have to justify the Well-Being that flows to you. In fact, you can't. Not one of you could ever do enough to earn your right to have sunshine every day. It’s not on anybody's list, not any of you are keeping track of the sun coming up, and even if you were, you couldn't control whether it does or not. And there’s not enough that you could do, or pay, for the benefit you receive from the sunshine that shines on this planet. There’s just nothing that you could do. That reward is bigger than anything you could earn. The Well-Being you are experiencing...just by being here...is not about earning ~ it’s about an Unconditional Love and Well-Being that is shining on you at all times. ~Abraham November 17, 2012 Dallas, TX Special thanks to Greg Daugherty for this quote. *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** Thank for " Abraham" *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** There is “ONE”(Source; Tao; True Self) law governing the Universe for the Universe is ONE . We need not obey a single law that is less than the “ONE”(Source; Tao; True Self) Law. There is but One Law and that is the only thing that we need to obey. A human being does not need to obey even the manifestation of law, which is gravitation. You need not obey even the conscious manifestation of law; you need obey only the law that controls these manifestations. The moment you become unconscious of the manifestation of law you are perfectly conscious of the Law that is All, the Allness or the Universality of Principle. Every manifestation of law then obeys us. We are in complete authority, complete dominion over every manifestation of law. 【Life and Teaching of the Masters of the Far East ；Volume 04 ; CHAPTER 10；By Baird T. Spalding】 *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** When traversing the vast sea of loneliness, "Oneness"(Source; Tao；True Self；God) is the only true safe harbor, compass, lighthouses, guide, eternal guiding principles. *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** In short there is nothing else anywhere, there is not a set of rules, there is not a stack of books, there are not teachers, there are not hidden documents, there is nothing outside of you that can come anywhere close to the Guidance that comes forth from within you. ~Abraham-Hicks, Great Awakening and Blending, AB–6, 1988 簡而言之,沒有任何其他地方,沒有任何一組規則,沒有任何一堆書,沒有任何一個老師,沒有任何隱藏的文檔,沒有什麼在你自性光明之外的"外法；外物；外人"，可以來接近那~~~出自你內在"真正自己"(大道；上主)自性光明的指引嚮導。 *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** The reason that you ever feel any emotion at all is because Source is right there thinking about the same thing at the same time with you. So when you are in sync with the thought Source thinks about it, you feel good. But when you are out of sync with what Source thinks about it, you feel bad. ~Abraham August 23, 2014 Denver, CO *** *** *** Once you understand your own Emotional Guidance System, you will never again be confused about where you are in relationship to where you want to be. Also, you will feel, with each thought that you offer, whether you are moving closer to, or further from, your desired outcome. If you are using any other influence as your Source of Guidance, you will get lost and go off track, for no others understand, as you do, the distance between where you are and where you want to be. ~Abraham *** *** *** The Source within is thinking about the same thing that you're thinking about and has a very powerful opinion about the same thing that you're thinking about. And your emotions are letting you know whether the opinion, whether the KNOWING of the Source within you, meshes with, or is in discord with, the thought you are thinking. ~Abraham-Hicks *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** Thank for “Abraham-Hicks” *** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** Mirror, mirror, mirror, ~~~! Mirror heaven, earth and heart. My mind-body, feeling, thought reflect on mirror of Heart-lake. I ask my heart about those question, ~~~~! What my believe about "what-really-I am & who-really-I am"? What my believe about" what-my world-really-are?". "What can get rid painful and get sweet fruits?"； "What can bring myself back to "True Self"(Tao；Brahman)?"； ***  Can I use my heart like mirror, just witness & watching & no identify with any kind of " I am this or I am that!"? Can I use my heart like mirror, just witness & watching & no identify with any kind of " I am this dreamer & dream or I am that dreamer & dream!"? Can I use my heart like mirror, just witness & watching & no identify with any kind of " I am this body-mind or I am that body-mind!"? Can I align with "Tao"(True Self；God)?； *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***