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iamlailanie · 3 years

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It's been a year but still...

Hi! It's been a while :) I guess It's been 2 years since I wrote my first blog. A lot of things have happened these past few years. There have been ups and MANY downs but it has taught us a lot in life especially we're in the middle of a worldwide global pandemic.

In terms of Pandemic:

It's already been a year when the quarantine imposed in Philippines. I never thought that these things will last longer than much as I expected. Covid-19 is surely a no joke. I remembered when we're still in the middle of reporting in our class, I am the last reporter which I am preparing my lines, practicing my tone and how should I deliver it. Then someone knocks the door, It was the guard reminding us that our class is dismissed due to circulating virus as Mayor Isko stated. Our professor agreed but after we finish the report. So I start reporting (which I know no one's listening) preparing their bags to leave lol. I'm a bit relief because I don't get questioned since our mind (our prof included) focuses on 1 week vacation. SIKE!

After we leave the class, We're actually excited obviously it's a 1 week suspension, We even plan to go somewhere, We even plan to go outing, swim and hike. But it never happened obviously, since the virus is circulating all over the news. We got scared ofc. After I went to dorm, I packed some of my things which we thought that it's just 1 week suspension. When I got home, the news said that the govt will continue the lockdown for another 1 month. Then goes another month, so on & so forth. GCQ, ECQ, MECQ, MGCQ, BBQ lmao. Unfortunately, a year had passed, Philippines is still not covid-free and still in ECQ.

I know all of us are struggling hard in different ways, Covid-19 isn't something that we should underestimate. It not just attacking our physical health but it attacks our mental health, emotional even financial either. Companies, food restaurants, schools, businesses, economy are also struggling and most of them are still haven't recovered from the bankruptcy. It's heartbreaking to see when people lost their jobs especially jeepney drivers begging for foods. Sometimes, I get really sad whenever I sleep comfortably and realizing that someone out there, begging and asking for help, dying, depressed, even some committing suicide. Some lost their love-ones, some are praying they can live more, some are wishing they could go back home, some are grasping for air.

However, despite of these circumstances , I hope that we don't stop having faith in God. He makes miracles everyday. We may not see the way how He moves, but you see, we're still living and fighting. Isn't that a blessing itself? God will give you the strength you need to hold on. Repeat after me:

At my lowest: God is my hope.

At my darkest: God is my light.

At my weakest: God is my strength.

At my saddest: God is my comforter.

Verses you can hold on:

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9

Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

In terms of my dental course: (update)

Currently, I am now in 3rd year, 2nd semester and still struggling as usual. I may say every subject is a challenge. It's quite difficult especially we're in online class. There's PROs and CONs regarding bout having online class as a student. Since I'm not yet a clinician, there would be a lot of pro's here.

Let's start with a Cons, As a dental student, Face to face is clearly a must but since Covid, we have to prioritize first our health safety.

1. There's a lot of distractions. You can't focus that much. It's either you have unstable connection or you use too much gadgets since you're not in the room. No one's watching. No one can stop you using your phones even you're in the middle of discussion. It's either you are in Tiktok, scrolling your newsfeed, playing games even watching movies, etc. Yes. You're listening but your presence of mind aren't there. (I'm attacking myself too)

2. As a dentistry student, ofc we have to bought dental materials, since I'm in Taguig, there's no dental shop near here, it's either we have to travel to Maynila, or order online which is really hella expensive. Two things test you there, Budget and Patience.

3. Practicals. Hands on. I don't need to further explain. No doctors, professors, friends can help you. You only have yourself. They can only guide you. (except if you have your parents/relatives that can teach and help you with the techniques which sadly I don't have). My parents help me in diff way, they're just there supporting me emotional and financial but not in practicals. There's only me, myself and I. Google, YouTube, Ebooks, Recorded lessons, even ppt slides will be your best friend.

4. You can't see your classmates and friends. I remembered every after exam, we hangout. We ate, sharing how hard our exam is. You have the peer support system.

5. Radiation. Always in your computer can give an headache so I bought an Eyewear to protect my eyes atleast from these radiation.

6. Teaches you to be lazy. IF only you are not taking seriously your studies. But in my case, In face to face, back then, I am diligently taking notes every discussion but now, just taking screenshot and printing the slides in one click.

7. And of course, You have no money.

On the other hand, Pros are:

1. You can sleep anytime. Just turn off your cam, then get your pillow, Zzzzz. Unless, your prof calls you for recitation.

2. You don't have to ligo. You can save water. Just brush your hair and then you can go to class. Walang makakaamoy. Tipid din sa damit lol.

3. You can procrastinate. I hate to admit but it's me.

4. You don't have to walk. After you wake up, you just have to sit and then open your computer or phone then you're in.

5. You can cheat. Not advisable but yes. If you want to pass without learning, you cheat. But if you wanna learn, you shouldn't.

7. You always have your "me time".

8. You can eat anytime.

9. You don't have to go to dorm, more quality time in your family.

10. You can leave class easily.

Therefore, I firmly believe that you never stop learning. You learn something new everyday. It's funny we never noticed. It's funny to think that the world is having problem with these pandemic while my problem is how to pass my subject. Haha

I may say, Dentistry is really really hard than much as I expected. Each steps are hard, sometimes, out of nowhere, I ask myself why am I even here? Why did I chose this again? Why do I keep trying? Is this really my calling? Ofc I admit all of that, There's a lot of what ifs. But to think in diff point of view, What if I never give up? What if I'll make it? What if I can? You see. It's the way you think. You're perception in life is what molds you. You can be a dentist if you think you can. You can be an engineer if you think you can. You can even be the next president if you want to. Everybody starts in having perception then next, execution.

I may not be smartest one, but no matter how smart or how beautiful you are, those things aren't valuable if you don't let God use you. Remember, when you feel inferiority, insecurity and self doubts creep into your heart, Ask God helps you to see yourselves the way He does.

Let our Delays, disappointments, fear, anger turns to breakthrough, patience, willingness and love. Repeat after me:

In God's Time. I will be.

We never know when will this end, God only knows. We just have to be strong and ask God to have MORE faith on Him.

Verse to hold on:

“If you can believe, all things are possible to HIM who believes.” Mark 9:23

More of Him, Less of Me.

I know it's been a year but still... God is by my side.

#dental #pandemic #covid 19 #online classroom

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