#sometimes i engage with anons if i want to make a point(TM) or if i have the energy to properly respond | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

if-confessions · 11 months

Note

As a writer and a reader, who has been around this community for the last three years, it has been crazy seeing the change in the if fandom as a community.

It used to be a positive environment for supporting independent game creators, but there is so much negativity against IF writers now. the readers are pushy, critical and demanding, expect games to cater to their exact preferences or be customisable to the point it might as well be a 'fill in the blanks' game instead of a narrative. IF writers are antagonistic towards each other, resentful of other creators success. There is a trend that when games/demos are successful, the authors become the target of attacks that seem to be looking for any excuse to take them down, and punish them for their popularity. The result is that a lot of games that are in the alpha stage / completed no longer use tumblr at all, which is a shame, because it was a unique opportunity for readers to engage and support an indie game creator.

I think the IF fandom really needs to do some soul searching on the type of environment it has created for indie game development / IF writing.

[I am assuming Anon meant the Tumblr/CoG scene of IF, as this is not a sentiment/trend shared by the overall IF community. Other scenes of IF don't care or even reject customisation "expected" here (doesn't mean they don't have their issues either).]

LOL, Anon. I was having an eerily similar conversation about the customisation the other day.

Communities do change overtime. As older members leave (because they don't enjoy the Thing-tm anymore, they don't have time for it, they don't like where the community is moving, they've been rejected by the community, etc...) and newer members arrive, the dynamics adapts to the current members. Sometimes it is for the better (more positive contacts, barring less-desirable members creating conflict from staying, etc...), sometimes it's for the worse (like in your message, attracting more problematic members or enabling the worst in people).

An issue with Tumblr that other communities may not have is how "decentralised" and lawless it is. Some groups may have guidelines/rules for interactions (resource blogs/authors asks rules), but you can't control all the members like you could in a Forum, for example. There is no Code of Conduct that limits what is and isn't acceptable (aside from the very board Tumblr CoC and even a lot of shitty things can be posted). There is no mods that can take down a post that will sent the community aflame (unless it is Staff bc the post was against their ToC/CoC). There is no consequences against bandwagon hate/harassment (even with the block button). So you end up with... well, this...

It would be nice if there was a bit more unity in the community, but that would require many people changing their behaviour and essentially stop being complete asswipes. And they are not the kind to stop shitting on others...

I'm pretty sure that a lot of those issue could be solved if people:

stopped being a dick in someome's dms/asks (should be a given, but damn are anons wild sometimes) <- like +75% of the issues would be gone with just this

would be respectful when sending messages/commenting (not making request, being pushy, etc...)

stopped following authors/projects not making them happy (that's a vicious cycle, easy to start hating on them...)

didn't put their problems and frustrations on strangers on the internet*

went outside to touch some grass (or take a break from Tumblr, it will do wonders!)

*This does not apply to the confession booth btw.. I'm talking reg accounts here. This applies to everyone, btw. You'd think this would be common knowledge to be decent to one another... but I guess not.

As a side note, to remind everyone that:

you do not have to have an open inbox if you don't want to

you do not have to have your dms open either

you do not have to allow anonymous messages

you do not have to answer every messages you receive or reply to every comment you get

you can trash any message you do not feel comfortable answering

you can delete comments/replies you do not feel comfortable with

(creator) you do not have to include every request readers make

you can block/unfollow users for any reason (or no reason)

you can block/report hateful anonymous messages

you can restrict reblogs/replies

you can change your mind at any time about accepting a kind of asks (like the NSFW ones)

you do not have to be on Tumblr every free moment you have

you do not have to interact with every post crossing your dashboard

Having boundaries is good, setting and voicing those boundaries is better, enforcing those boundaries is extra important.

Until then...

🤷

Now making a fill-in the blank IF would be a fun idea...

[old comments in tags: be the change you want to see i guess im just trying to stay silly here /]

Under the cut, some more rambling and wild assumptions about how we got here.

===> Increased entitlement in the community

Note: this is a generalisation. Not every reader is entitled, not every request is outrageous, and not every author is a pushover. We are talking about visible trends.

There's no denying that it has had quite the impact on the community and how games are set. Gone(-kinda) are the days with completely unique characters with a unique voice and its set path, hail the rule of customisation that inevitably becomes too overwhelming for any creator to keep track and complete the story. Is the "CoG expectations" the culprit, there? With the CoG to Tumblr exodus, yaknow...

But it must have started from somewhere to have those vocal entitled readers hounding creators for all this stuff, they can't have appeared out of nowhere! Twine games from the 2010s were not chokefull of customisation...

Honestly, it wouldn't surprise me if it all started with some minor request for customisation, which was accepted by the author, which may have made other readers realise they too could have requests or expect the same kind of customisation in other project, and this snowballed into... *wave at the mess*, creating a vicious cycle of base customisation expectations (which are getting insane...), shunning pieces who do not fit those expectations, and still having more special requests*. *Honestly, the authors could just accept those request but as like paid content. Oh, you want more that will definitely fuck my whole timeline of planned work? Tip me like 100$ and I will...

At the same time, and this is an observation that has been accentuated with the kinds of asks I've gotten here, some authors have not helped the situation either. With people almost begging for interactions and notes or just to please the readers because they are interested in that stilly little project (or the pressure from blowing up, or before the idea is set in stone), some authors will seriously bend over and backwards for those requests, even if it means forgoing the OG plans altogether because it doesn't fit with the promised request.

Readers feels more empowered to ask -> there is a pressure to cater to readers to get interactions or the request has become part of the base expectations -> request is accepted, but author might feels resentful -> readers feels more entitled to ask -> etc...

Readers feel more empowered to ask -> the author refuses -> readers put pressure on the author because another one accepted it or iT Is cOmMon KnOwLeDge -> author feels resentful towards the community...

Which is kind of related to point number 2...

===> Numbers go up and Jealousy

Note about this point: I am not talking about the want to be seen by other people, to feel like your message has been heard, to have your presence acknowledged. That's what we are kinda all doing by putting our stuff out there.

Every time I get an ask about someone worrying that to do have enough traction on their project or get zero interactions and they have lost all their motivations or are resentful to newer projects blowing up*, I honestly struggle to see a positive future for this scene. It seems like everything is about notes and reblogs and how many followers you have and how many ratings you can get and how many asks you get and etc... *see the no demo discussion

What is supposed to be a hobby for 99% of us is turning into some ugly race to have the highest number of *wave again at things*, by tanking other creators rating average, manipulating your followers to boost your own, creating rumours about a project/author, sending hate anons, creating dumb drama, stealing/plagiarising whole ass games, etc... Just to be at the top and have the biggest number. Numbers, I feel like I need to point out, means absolutely nothing outside of this website (or even this scene of IF). I really don't understand this dumb race...

And it is so frustrating to see, because we should be hyping each other up, discussing each others fav games, being excited to see another voice join and create stuff. It's not like we have to all be the best of friends and blind ourselves from any misgivings. No, we should still be able to criticise constructively or call out bad behaviour. But the whole envy and jealousy* oozing from the community is really... bleh. *doesn't mean you can't be jealous/envious of someone else, I know I am. Just use those feelings creatively, not to put down yourself or others.

Same with the whole notes/interaction thing. Outside affirmation is great, it really is, and boy does it gives a nice boost to the ego and the energy levels to continue when you get some (especially when the other person is gushing about your project). But basing all your motivation to create on outside approval will lead to a lot of pressure to perform when you get it, despair and disappointment when you don't, and resentment when you see other get more.

===> Parting notes

Ugh... I spent too long on this shit. I'm going for a walk before I get more sad. Then, I'm coming back to play my friend's game and create something weird.

#confession time #if-confessions #dark side of if #follower behaviour #inbox boundaries #undecided tag

18 notes · View notes

endreal · 4 years

Note

WHY are trans people so entitled that they think asking everyone else to fund their surgeries is ok? pay for your own way. be a damn adult. lordy.

This is normally the kind of ask that I would block the sender and then delete because this is a glaring bad faith question from a person who seems to want to get a rise outta someone, but just this once I'd like to use it as a platform to make a broader point.

It is an incredibly beautiful thing to allow yourself to be a part of a community and to engage with it in healthy ways. Humans are inherently social, and inherently lean on each other in times of need. It's just What Humans Do(tm).

In a community that is predicated on nurture and mutual uplift, it's healthy to be able to ask for help (even sometimes if it's uncomfortable or difficult), accept beneficial help when it's offered, provide help when you're able, and appreciate those who reach out to help when they're able also.

In a community like that, concepts like obligation and entitlement start to fade into the background because when everyone is focused on lifting up each other when they're able, then everybody rises together even if it's just a little bit at a time.

And I think that sort of love is beautiful.

~Send me anons and asks for TMI Tuesday!~

42 notes · View notes

bartsugsy · 7 years

Note

Is it just me or is anyone else so offended by Rebecca's character because she is such a pale shadow of female representation? I'm outraged that in the 21st century a woman can be not even a set of character traits, but literally a walking (nice dressed) uterus who bends in the wind. No agency whatsoever. Deplorable! Rebecca makes me miss the 90s and the riot grrrl movement. She makes me want to daub myself in blood and put on a baby doll dress and scream into the abyss. What were they thinking?

ah anon, you know i can’tresist a good rebecca ask. it’s my weakness.

and like... you’re really not wrong.

i mean, i don’t know if it offends me - well, yes, it does, buti think rebecca was brought in for a few specific narrative purposes and iguess that’s ok in and of itself, but they’ve never fleshed her out into muchof a real character beyond those purposes so she exists in her currentiteration as a supporting character and they don’t seem to have any desire tochange that. which. just makes it uncomfortable, the more you think about it. andapparently I’ve thought about it a bunch.

i think the other thing is… those narrative purposes she has aremostly related to male characters. they’ve fleshed this out a little but mostlyshe’s been fairly irrelevant to every storyline - except one. there is onestoryline in which she is completely necessary in her function and it is clearly entirely the reason why she was brought in in the first place.

what i’m saying is that rebecca white literally exists todevelop robert sugden as a character and prop up his relationship with aaron.

(you could maybe argue that she is important to the whitestorylines but those have had very little long term affects beyond the waysthat link robert to the whites. i want to go into this more but i need toactually rewatch her white storyline stuff first, so maybe i’ll change my mind,but tbh it feels more like… her relationship with her family is a by-product ofbringing her in for her main purpose of affecting robert and robron. again,that’s for another post)

but that in turn leads to her being written like an inconsistentplot device. i think i’ve sort of developed enough of a fanwanky reasoningbehind her actions so far, but it doesn’t work as well as i’d like. it doesessentially boil down to her being in love with robert, though - she’s, ithink, actually a very tragic character and i have a lot of sympathy for her -but it takes a hell of a lot of mental gymnastics constantly to bring me backto that place, because the show doesn’t care enough to do it for us. and it’sannoying. because i do think they could make her story so compelling if theywanted to.

but ultimately they wouldn’t, because robert is in many ways avillain in her story and the story they want to tell is more robert being avillain in his own story (and again, that’s another post all on its own).they’re not telling rebecca’s story. not at all.

anyway! basically. female character essentially being the toolthe show uses to explore male character robert and his relationships. great. gr e a t.

and because what’s the point in making big sweeping contentiousstatements if you can’t back them up:

so the big thing the show has tried to drill into our headsrepeatedly is that robert was with chrissie for her money and her power,largely. he loved her in his own way, but he loved himself way more. he flirtedhis way up the company through lawrence, exploiting lawrence’s complicatedfeelings about his own sexuality and attraction to robert (see: the iconicscene close to the beginning of ryan!robert’s introduction where he saysexactly that to larry and suddenly we are given a window into why exactlylawrence hates robert so vehemently, to the point of faking a heart attack tostop his first attempt to marry chrissie). saw an opening and got with chrissieand then rebecca and then eventually chose chrissie, who undoubtedly has moreof a pull in the running of the company and more access to the money, as opposedto free-spirited rebecca, who we’ve seen is not at all competent at working inthe business and has very little overall experience with it.

we see robert repeatedly reaping the benefits of the whites’money and power - and the position that we know he is in fact very good at,thereby earning his own money on top of that (but again - in a position hefasttracked his way to via chrissie and lawrence).

anyways (you already know this is gonna be long af bc look howmuch im rambling) we see, particularly in the argument after chrissie finds outabout the home farm robbery and his reaction to almost dropping the cheque shegives him - and really everything robert does in that break up with chrissie,when he’s desperate to get his old life back, that robert ultimately cares moreabout the money than he does about his wife.

fast forward to robert post-coma, post-redemption arc and nowfully committed to being in a relationship with aaron. he still loves money andfights hard to make as much of it as possible, usually still somehow at theexpense of the whites, but we as an audience don’t have any solid proof thatrobert really cares more about aaron than he does about his og love, money.

we’ll come back to this in asecond, but the other thing we see in robert’s relationship with chrissie isthat he never exactly had any compunction to remain faithful to her. he says to aaronearly on (in the barn) that he has had a bunch of one night stands, but neveranything beyond that, which is the first indication to the audience that somehowaaron is different for robert. we later learn that he did in fact also sleepwith rebecca multiple times. according to robert, it was all before he andchrissie got serious, whatever that means in rob’s mind , at which pointhe stopped, although we also know that he and rebecca had sex at rob andchrissie’s engagement party (side note, my best guess - that was the last time they slepttogether and also when he knocked her up the first time).

anyways, outside of rebecca and later, aaron, robert had alsohad a bunch of one night stands and just… generally couldn’t keep it in hispants.

again, robert and aaron later become a real couple, long afterhe and chrissie are over for the last time and robert doesn’t seem to beinterested in anyone else (at all, he basically puts his life on hold tosupport aaron throughout the first part of 2016). but - equally, he’s never putin a situation where he’s had the chance.

bringing this back to rebecca - one of the first things she doesis show that she is working with robert to take down chrissie - she’s angry atchrissie for not telling her about lawrence getting shot, or anything that’sbeen going on (and - it’s chrissie that she wants to hurt, not larry or lucky,so we’re once again treated to two girls treating each other like shit for abit, joy of joys) and she wants to help robert get chrissie her comeuppance andalso protect her inheritance. robert brought her in and robert is the onlycharacter she’s not lying to, when she first comes to the village. her sceneswith her family all have the undertone of the fact that she is doing thisbecause robert convinced her to - it’s all about robert’s revenge, narrativelyspeaking.

to bring back my earlier points about robert’s love of money andinfidelity, a lot of her early scenes exist to set the stage for robertproposing in ssw and to show the audience that rob has, in fact, changed - sheoffers him all of home farm, all of that power back, and he says no. she triesto sleep with him repeatedly and he turns her down again and again.

and this pattern continues - she keeps pushing him and he flirtsback, kisses her even - his stupid way of keeping her inside so that they caneventually clear andy’s name, as he says to her when he finally shuts her downonce and for all outside the courthouse. the lines he says to her repeatedlyare things about how important aaron is to him - the show starts to build upthis picture that aaron is special to robert, but also robert is still hisrobert sugden-y self and isn’t above doing stupid things or pushing his stupidplans too far in order to get his way.

like. god i’m not going to list them all THIS IS LONG AND EXTRA TM ENOUGH but there are literallygifsets that exist of all the ways robert proclaims his love for aaron torebecca. so much of their scenes are used to both strengthen our knowledge ofhow much robert loves aaron and also to sow those seeds that robert does stupidand reckless things at the expense of that relationship sometimes - that heloves aaron but he sure as hell also loves money too.

but - again - in the narrative, we’ve been shown repeatedly thatwhen push comes to shove, robert always chooses aaron, that he doesn’t have anydesire to be unfaithful to aaron and he won’t choose money over hisrelationship. even when he was unfaithful, it was basically the product of an emotional breakdown as opposed to his apparent motivation of eh this person is hot and i’m bored why not when he was with chrissie.

and rebecca is the tool that leads the show to show us that so so often.similarly, rebecca is the catalyst for aaron’s jealousy and his eventual prisonstoryline.

everything since her entrance has slowly allowed the show tobuild up to aaron and robert breaking up. every one of their storylines hastied into that, or somehow been driven by her presence. every single one. andthe thing is… it’s nothing to do with who she even is - beyond that initialmanipulative streak she had which has disappeared entirely, it seems.

i know i’ve spoken a lot about her lack of agency as acharacter (and... just about her in general... here here here here here here here here and here are some casual examples... jfc...), so i don’t want to rehash that aspect but… it is more than that,isn’t it? it’s not just her lack of agency - it’s that, while she is absolutelyCRUCIAL to everything that has happened to robert and aaron and the constantcatalyst for every bad decision they’ve made, to showing us the ways thatthey’re not working, it’s not about who she is. who she is is irrelevant. theonly thing she ever needed to be was in love with robert and passive enough tokeep getting pulled back into his orbit and to help him do his bidding,regardless of how he has treated her. she never needed to be more than that andshe really… isn’t, in all honesty. again, i spoke earlier this week about herlack of core characteristics and that plays into that. more than that, eventhough she is the character that has been driving robert and aaron into Troublewith a capital T over and over, none of it has ever really been about her.

mostly - mostly it’s been about showcasing problems that alreadyexisted between them, working towards potentially resolving those issues, or atleast highlighting that they exist.

one argument to the above - recently it has become more abouther in the sense that aaron says that robert sleeping with rebecca inparticular, as his ex and as the catalyst for aaron’s initial jealousy - androbert being tied to her in particular with a baby, was so much more painfuland untenable to him than it might have been, had rob instead slept with arandom.

(it would never have been a random though because as the showtold us, even robert and rebecca sleeping together wasn’t about rebecca - itwas about robert in pain and wanting to hurt aaron. rebecca was an easy targetfor robert - the only thing she needed to be, in that episode, was desperatelyin love with robert enough to ignore any moral compunction she initially had tonot sleep with an emotionally destroyed dude who was married to someone sheproclaimed to like, which she was).

again - it always, always comes down to aaron and in particular,robert. and MORE THAN THAT, we now have robert on screen, being shown in apretty sympathetic light (for rob), in agony over the loss of aaron, once againallowing robert to show character development, to show his absurd love foraaron. and getting into spoiler territory, we know he’s going to get pulledback into the white orbit in a particularly 2015, pre aaron’s good influenceway - something made particularly possible by this brand new unshakeable bondto the whites through his son, who is currently chilling inside rebecca

(although you would never know if from her outfits)

none of rebecca’s story has been about rebecca. she’s pregnantand they haven’t even shown that really - not much beyond the fact that herfamily are supportive and the ways in which it has affected aaron and robert.

she just. she exists for robert and aaron and their story.possibly also the end of the whites, but that’s to be seen. that’s it. andthat… kind is really offensive.

or at least, it’s just writing that is very careless towards afemale character - something which is incredibly prevalent across the show as awhole, but particularly irksome here because this is the storyline we reallycare about lmfao

#yes so this is well over 2000 words #which is absurd #but i had a good time writing and that's what really counts isn't it #emmerdale meta #answering anons

32 notes · View notes

natashacoco · 4 years

Note

You give amazing advice from what I see, and I could really use some. How do you deal with fandom drama?

Y’all are seriously making my little Virgo heart burst with these advice asks.

It depends on the type of drama honestly. I’ve been on this site for 5+ years and I’ve been apart of 3.5 fandoms and drama happens to be part of it unfortunately.

My first suggestion would be to block the posts of the subject or whatever drama you don’t want to see. I think it’s called blacklist it? (I could be wrong and I’ve never personally done it, but I’m sure you could google it or even look up videos). That’s a good starting point.

Filter out the blogs that you’re generally going back to and interact with them. You’ll end up making amazing friends that way

If things persist, you can unfollow the blog, yes, you can unfollow a blog. No explanations are needed. I really wish people would’ve told me this when I joined my first fandom. I may get some unfollows for this but YOU DON’T HAVE TO CONTINUE TO FOLLOW BLOGS JUST BECAUSE OTHERS DO!!! I’m talking about the “big blogs” of the fandoms that sometimes come off as all mighty and kinda demand the follow as well as the “smaller” or not as well known ones that may just be starting out. Just because others follow them doesn’t mean you should feel pressured or obligated to follow them. Follow the people you want, and unfollow the ones you no longer do. I went on unfollow spree myself with a certain fandom and I only check it when I want to and I ain’t bothered by it one bit. You’re in control of your TM and generally what you wish to see on it. Follow the blogs that have content that you enjoy and that will make your tumblr experience amazing.

If things are really bad, you can either unfollow the tag for that particular fandom or even leave it altogether. Some things just aren’t worth it, trust me. At the end of the day anon, you’re on here to enjoy what you want to enjoy.

Side note: I wouldn’t suggest doing a call out post. I have in the past, but only in rare occurrences, even one where somebody asked me to step in because they feared getting attacked by a part of the fandom. Fandoms can be toxic and draining, but in the same breath they can also be really engaging and amazing with a supportive community.

I hope this helps!!!

#personal #advice #a certain fandom got too much drama going on #fandom life #fandom advice anon #ask #answered #anon #anonymous ask #anon ask #people in my last two fandoms need to hear this #don’t feel like you HAVE to follow people #do what you need to do #do what’s best for you

0 notes

rainbowderpturtle · 7 years

Text

re: that post about how tumblr is technically “public” but most ppl use it like it’s private and ppl who wanna Start Shit TM do the equivalent of kicking in ur bedroom door w/ a megaphone ???

man that really is like. the Worst part of tumblr. the thing i absolutely hate the most about this hellsite. giving shitheads who are already inclined not to mind their own damn business the impression that it is wholly unnecessary to mind your own DAMN BUSINESS

it’s absolutely mindboggling that at the flip of a coin, any interaction at all can be seen as a personal attack and an open invitation to critique every facet of ur existence, even if ur just yellin into the void on ur own personal blog and someone else actively searching for content might just HAPPEN to glance at it fdsjkf

like i haven’t actually reblogged anything and left a comment in what feels like 5 calendar years, i specifically say everything i Really Really want to say in tags, and everything else gets silenced. and thats not even shit i want to say TO anyone, and dont particularly want anyone to hear, it’s just to myself for my own records so maybe one day i’ll find that thing and remember those thoughts and ???? idk have FUN possibly ,

and still, STILL, EVEN THEN, theres still people, just, out in the world, walking around LIVING, like Shitty Anon TM, who specifically go to my blog to see my tags to see if they might be able to find something to disagree with so they can hand-craft me a personal message delivered directly to mine eyes in which they yell that they think im stupid or whatever

even the most casual, subtle, private content is Subject To Public Ridicule to the point where LITERALLY the ONLY WAY you can get nosy drama chasing bastards to give you ANY peace and quiet is to PASSWORD PROTECT YOUR BLOG so that NO ONE CAN SEE ANYTHING YOU DO, EVER unless u slip it to them under the table like its a drug deal fjdksljfd or they fuccin hack u i guESS like what kind of insane self centered nonsense .. .... ......

sometimes i look at my 20 side blogs i managed to maintain for about a month before i was forced to private them for my own mental fucking wellbeing and i just think fdhjhf what s th e poi nt ... ...... why not just type into a word document and right click save all pictures i like onto my computer like its 2004, its the same concept

genuinely, i don’t know how one would go about Fixing this, but if tumblr WERE to Fix this, it would probably solve 90% of my issues with this stupid thing and i’d be a lot more engaging around here. and it would make me a hell of a lot less sad and paranoid all the time, bc there would probably be less of sad queer kids trying to have a good time w/ their friends when all of a sudden Mister First Day Of A Freshman Year Debate Class rolls in and calls them nazis bc Hitler Exaggerated Truths To Serve His Own Purposes Once, And So Do These Random Teenagers, Coincidence???? I Think Not ,

idk i’m probably reading too much into it tm as usual but it just feels like an extension of the general public’s intolerance for queer kids and girls and stuff, y’know, existing in a visible way and being human.

#it longe #btw if ur a friem (or at least a chill person fdjhskf) u can always look at my readmores and talk 2 me & stuff :'>#i wont mind #unrelated concept of the day that i cant stop thinking about: Tru Objectivity is impossible & doesnt fit in the universe #its just unrealistic.gif #anyway the example at the end is a real thing that i saw today on tumblr dot com and i still cant believe it #the world is pudding #timetotext

0 notes