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popculturebuffet · 3 years

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The Loud House Valentine’s Day Double Feature (Back in Black and Stage Plight) or My My My Once Bitten Twice Shy

What is up my Loudites? And while I am returning to the Loud House I do have some sad news to get out of the way first.. i’m ending regular coverage of the Loud House. I don’t like doing this.. but when I picked up the show, I didn’t really have a set schedule.. and that was a bad thing as I didn’t get nearly everything I wanted done. Now I have one and honestly it’s been great: it allows me to stay focused and if I end up not feeling what I was going to do that day, provided it’s not a comission or specfically needed that day, I can swap things around a bit easier.

The reason I bring this up is Nick’s way of scheduling means I CAN’T reasonably put the show on the schedule. They often don’t announce airdates until the wee before, which isn’t a bad thing WATCHING, and isn’t unresonable for a children’s network. But for someone who likes to have a concrete schedule at the top of the month, still flexable and able to make changes if they come up but at least some idea of what i’ll be doing and when, that’s a non-starter, as not knowing when a show’s going to be there or not really messes with things. In contrast Disney puts up their entire programming schedule for next month towards the end, so I know if a show’s coming back, and thus that it’ll probably be around for next month’s too. And if it goes away a week earlier than expected then super I have that space for other sttuff. But I just have too much other stuff, paid and on my own time, to keep friday’s open in perpetuity.

I will however still reviewing the show infrequently as I still love it, Season 5 will probably have plenty of episodes I want to talk about, already it has Leni running for mayor which sounds like one of my wonky spinoff ideas and I love it all the more for that, and ther’es tons of episodes I have and haven’t seen to dig into. So like Lori I won’t be in the house on a daily basis but i’m still going to show up a lot. I already have an April Fools special planned, as well as a retrospective ready for some time in the future. And of course if more Sam and Luna episodes show up, you know i’ll be on those as fast as humanly possible so yeah not leaving the show.. just not coveirng it because I like having some control of my schedule, it’s a thing with me.

Good then we can get to why your ACTUALLY reading this unless you’ve already scrolled past or scrolled up to this. Next Sunday is Valentine’s Day, and so to continue Valnetine’s Shenanigans on this fine blog, i’m doing some romantic style episodes of the loud hosue for you. I did intend for this to be bigger, but frankly i’ve been running behind on reviews and running out of steam lately, so I paired it down to the two I wanted to do most. So for today we’ll be covering two of the show’s couples: One they badly need to bring back and I question why they haven’t, and one that I feel has gotten a lot of flack for things that aren’t it’s fault. Both are really adorable so expect some awkward blushing, bats, blood, and other stuff rhyming with B under the cut!

Back in Black: So we begin our double feature with Lucy

Yeah I have not covered this adorable harbinger of death enough on this blog, and intended to do this one, among other lucycentric episodes back in october.. and the fact I didn’t is a good argument for why I have a schedule now ain’t it? But sometimes your plans not panning out right at the exact time you planned them works out for you. Not getting to do Plan 9 From Mission Hill during Pride Month meant I got to do it on comission later. And not getting to do this one at Halloween means it still works fine just fine for valentine’s day.

So we begin the episode with Lincoln working on his science project, with Rusty coming over to help.

Shockingly though not only is he not just taking a nap or hitting on Lincon’s sisters while Lincoln works but actually helping, he’s actually good at it. I’m as suprsied as you. Though this is early in his characterization, so he hasn’t’nt been established as horribly sucking at everything or his friends being done with his bullshit QUITE yet. Give him time. This is an interesting moment in the character’s history though, as it’s the episode that firmly establishes him as a close friend of Lincolns. While he was already turned from a member of a random violence gang to LIncoln’s buddy in the span of season 1, this episode cements him as one of his closer pals simply by him coming over and the two being fairly familiar with one another. Granted by that same token Girl Jordan should be in the group.. and I have nothing to add to that. Add Girl Jordan to the Lincrew. Just do it.

Anyways Rusty brought his brother along. And you’d expect me to be terrified as there’s now three of them. But.. nope I like Rocky. He’s a chill kid and his personality goes together well with Lucy’s as while he’s a more typical kid, he’s still very subdued in his emotions like she is. Also he mentions both parents so my divorce theory.. is honestly still valid as this was three seasons ago and I could buy their mother left during that time.

And yes Lucy’s in love.. and stalking him a bit as she follows him around the house sighing while he wonders who did that.. though it is a nice clue their compatible. When you can sense the presence of someone whose big running gag is showing up out of nowhere to scare the crap out of people that means something. And it’s either that you’d really get that person or your Wolverine. Or one of his kids. Or his clones. Or clones of his clones. What i’m saying is Rusty’s mom banged the wolverine and his family tree is really weird even by marvel standards.

But I do give her a pass as she’s not trying to be creepy or obsessive, she just doesn’t know how to talk to him as he’s your average kid and she’s a creature of the night. It’s just a kid being shy which is very refreshing both because pre-savnio being fired the show had some very messed up ideas about relationships and gender politics at times, the latter of which actually crops up here, and because having grown up with the cartoons of the 90′s and 2000′s.. I had to put up with things like this.

Full Disclosure: I DO ship sonamy.. but only after around Sonic Chronicles, where Bioware and then Sega decided to not make “Constantly harasses sonic despite him clearly not being interested and saying so vocally” and “Obessess over him to a point I worry she’s going to break his legs so he’ll never run away from her again”, as well as aging her up from 12. Still find her ungodly annoying at best and terrible at worst before that point, Sonic CD and Sonic Advance excluded. And yes I am that huge of a nerd, damn proud of it too.

What i’m getting at is that a little girl unable to talk to a guy and only being kinda creepy because that’s what she does is LEAGUES better than “IT’S NOT CREEPY WHEN A WOMAN DOES IT”. Given this episode was written by a woman that probably helped a lot if not entirely but I don’t blame her for that.. more on that later.

Point is she’s smitten but her first attempt to talk goes back as he rushes to leave after she tries talking to him.. and also appears out of nowhere to spook him. Come on man, your better than that. YOu sensed her before why not now? Up your game. But yeah Lucy’s depressed while Lincoln talks to her about it, about them leaving and once Lucy confesses she’s into rocky asks what he’s into. Lincoln.. has no idea as he’s barely been around Rocky. He’s just an average kid he dosen’t quite understand. Normal is the word he uses and Lucy ponders that. We next see the three most traditionally feminine sisters, Lori, Leni and Lola, all pissed someone stole their stuff, though Lori does suspect Lola at first because let’s face it, this fits her MO of being an entitled brat and not being above petty theft. But no the culprit is Lucy who genuinely apologizes and understands that their mad but the other girls are fine with it given the context, which Lucy explained, and are happy to make her over. This is where the problem I was hinting at comes in: ALL the girls are on board with this makeover plan. the problem is.. only the three who came in in the first place make actually sense making Lucy more tradiotnally feminine. Lori loves fashion and is a control freak who has troubles with empathy at times especially at this point in the series, Leni while not INTETIONALLY hurtful is kind of ditzy and thus can miss some cues, and Lola has a yawning starless void where her soul should be. For these three? Yeah this plot actually makes sense they wouldn’t think of Lucy’s feelings and actually help her use who she is to get rocky or tell her it doesn’t matter she’s beautiful as she is.. then presumably bring the wrath of god down on that poor child before things were cleared up. The issue is more dragging the other sisters into it. It only fits the three above to really give a shit about making Lucy more “normal” and “Girly” and “Other stereotypical bullshit”. Luna is very chill and empathetic and would be the first to say “Wait maybe making her the opposite of herself isn’t a good idea”, Luan is likewise empathetic though I could possibly see it she really doesn’t need to be in this plot, Lynn ENTIRELY doesn’t fit as she prefers sports and getting dirty and what not and is the closest to Lucy out of the sisters and thus would probably be the most defensive about her not changing and that could’ve actually been interesting, Lana would be the same minus the being closest and Lisa is coldly detached a lot of the time and wouldn’t care about any of this on a good day. It feels HORRIBLY offensive and out of character to have them all suddenly be “nah your not girly enough”. These girls don’t give a shit about whose more feminine than who and it’s really bad to pidgeonhole them as that. However.. I dont’ blame episode writer Gloria Shen entirely for this. She wrote it, she gets some of the discredit.. but she didn’t DIRECT the episode and a LOT can change from page to screen. No THAT was series creator and known sexual preadator Chris Savino. And i’m not just blaming him because he’s a creepy asshole, but because the seasons he directed, seasons 1, 2 and most of 3, had a bad habit of having episodes where all the girls acted as a group and often to weak ends, like the green house, the one where they all fought, the gender swap episode or heavy meddle.. which is a headache for another day. Point is it doesn’t surprise me he didn’t fix this or even genuinely cared to differentiate them and it’d be until next season where the show fully became an ensemble piece. SO yeah I blame him on this not for his horrible history, but simply because it sounds like his writing style and as director, and a producer on the show, he had the power and responsibility to fix things and did nothing. So if it wasn’t directly his fault in the first place , he certainly didn’t fix it, call it out in storyboarding or well anything. So yeah shared blame all around.

So after a makeover montage, Lucy is uh... well I can’t describe the abomination they’ve created.

I mean.. none of it works, and I think that’s very much the intent, dosen’t make it any less horrifying. Nothing about this is right: makeup REALLY shouldn’t go on a child in any circumstace so the blush on her cheeks is creepy and makes her look like one of those creepy porcelian dolls that i’m 100% sure either are planning to kill us all one day or were made to keep the souls of the damned trapped inside forever. The ear rings just look creepy and again are a bit much for an 8 year old, and the blonde hair just brings it all together. The pink outfit is fine.. I guess but the face is just so unsettling I can’t process the rest of her outfit and i’m not even going to try.

Point is she looks terrifying, and not in the fun way she usually does, and Rocky dosen’t know what to make of this. Oh and if your wondering why he’s here Lynn just.. took a hockey stick to Lincoln’s project to get the Spokes Boys back over here, and Lisa mocked him for pointing out the obvious holes in their plan despite being 4 and LIncoln having a girlfriend at this point. Granted his relationship with Ronnie Anne at this point is also kinda effed up, but given you all pushed him in this direction, Lisa still has no room to talk and they amicably broke up at some point once the writers decided “Let’s pretend like this never happened and they were just friends, despite her being introduced with a crush on him and us still replaying episodes with said relationship in play, instead of actually dealing with this directly”. You may be easily able to guess what hte retrospective’s about at this point. So Lori comes in for phase two .. WITH BOBBY!

Just.. I cannot tell you how much I needed my boy to calm me down after the last two scenes of horribly off character writing and ... that thing up there. He dosen’t do much this episode but every episode is better with Bobby and that’s a scientefic fact. So Lori claims they had a double date fall through which Bobby barely follows along with.. and it does kinda feel pressurey to kinda force Rocky’s hand here but her intentions ARE good, and a group date is a good way to relive presssure. It just ends up falling through becaue Lori wants her to act intentionally helpless, which makes no sense both for Lori’s personality given how driven and controlling she is and how Bobby clearly knows both things and likes the first and she worked on the second for him. So yeah the golf date falls through and Lori apologizes for being a bitch about all of this, as they all do, which again. .has me questioning WHY we needed the whole sister group instead of just Lori and co. Or even just Lori. The show REALLY needed to learn character ballance and while it is struggling on occasion, as seen with how lincolncentric this season has been so far, this episode reminds me it used to be MUCH worse.

But Lucy thanks them because their intetnions were good, i’m going to need a citation on that given it came off as them wanting her to change because they found her weird nad not because they genuinely wanted to help her, and goes off to sulk about being alone. Lincoln dosen’t know what to do till the next day where, again suprisingly, Rusty had the right idea and had them come over to his place. We also find out he’s scared of blood.. which.. I can relate to. Seriously i’ve only insulted the guy once the whole episode

But we find that out because Rocky made his own because he actually found Lucy’s really cool, what a kid. So Lincoln gets the brothers over to his house by damaging the project himself then claming they need to go back and once he sees Lucy’s around has Rocky go into the kitchen to get them some sodas which he agrees to because why not.

So in a nice little change-up on the running gag Rocky shows up startling Lucy and we get a really fucking cute scene as they hash things out. They have a normal conversation, finally getting past their shared awkwardness, in part because he admits he prefers her as herself. As it turns out Rocky wasn’t scared.. he just thought she was too cool for him and felt intimidated and like Lucy had no idea what to say. The two then blush and after my heart melts and I freeze it back into shape in a few hours, the two decide to go look at her coffin collection and the next day proudly show off their perfected fake blood.. which destroys the project one more time. WAH WAH WAH. Oh rusty... I knew I could count on you to fuck up at least once.

Back in Black Final Thoughts: First off Black in Black: Weird Name. I mean it kinda gives the game away, not that fans would thikn horrifying mistake lucy would stick but still, and dosen’t really fit. Call it “Why Do Ghoul’s Fall in Love” or something like that or something related to makeovers. Makeover Mistep. Don’t Make Me Over. Makeover Your Case... okay that last one sounds more like the Legally Blond equilvent of Cobra Kai but the point is it’s just weird. Outside of the parts I already went in detail about why their dreadful.. this ep is pretty good. That one bit isn’t enough to derail the episode, merley take it’s goodness down a notch, and Lucy is genuinely fun to watch and her heartbreak is hard to watch, and Rocky was an engaging new character with lots of potetial. A large part of why I did this episode. is to ask WHY he hasn’t come back. Rusty’s now a major character, to the point he’s co-headlining an episode next week with Zach... why Zach’s getting an episode, a SECOND one at that I have no earthly idea but the point is the show’s getitng comfortable enought heir giving lincoln’s friends starring episodes without him too, as Liam got one , if alongside Lynn the power couple of 2021 I tells ya. My point is, besides when is Stella getting an episode dammit, that Rocky really should make a come back as he both provides another character for Rusty and the rest of the lincrew to bounce off of, and he and Lucy had genuine chemstiry and now she has her OWN cast there’s an easy story there about her friends reaction to her dating a non goth. There’s a lot of story potetial with this precious boy bring him back. But overall Pretty in Black is a decent episode, worth checking out if you haven’t seen it and rewatching even if you have.

Stage Plight: So we open with Luann, whose one of my personal faviorites along with Leni, Luna, and Lucy. Granted I haven’t checked out her yearly bouts of going ax crazy on her family yet, but we’ll see in april. But outside of that, which is easy enough to isee iven it’s three episodes out of 214 where she’s like this and she gets her compuance, I find her precious, awkward, and entertaining, from her habit of saying “Get it “ to her love of puns, to the fact she’s essentially a wholesome version of the batman villian the ventriloquist..

Yeah in case you forgot about this gag, she often talks through her dummy Mr. Coconuts.. who functions as her sounding board and helps her figure things out, talks like he’s from the 40′s or 50′s, and in general is a delight. He also once or twice, including this episode acts of his own free will so I don’t know if this is a Child’s Play situation and a dying comedian put his body in her dummy and she’s just rolling with it, if she somehow put a piece of her soul in a dummy or what the hell’s going on here. Compared to the series recently what with it’s mayoral campagins, children murdering guys, and actualy factual spies, this is mildly sane. MIldly. This may also be a serious and untreated case of Disociative Identnity Disorder, but given it’s not framed that way, and Coconuts just seems to be Luann’s way of talking with herself, for now she has’nt gone full vintriloquist. Thoguh givne her april fools day behavior and her profession as a comedian, she probably WILL become the new joker at a some point.

So the two are talking about Luann’s crush on Benny. Benny was introduced back in L is for Love and is one of the only three love interests there to actually return, and along with Sam the only onen to get multiple episodes about their relationship with their respective loud and a full personality. He was also MASSIVELY hated. For those who joined the fandom more recently, Luann was massively shipped with Maggie, an emo girl who showed up in Luann’s second spotlight episode and one where she didn’t torment her entire family, one I still need to see but have read about. It was pretty cute and nothing was wrong with that or the opposites attract dynamic. But said fans got REALLY and understandibly upset about his introduction and were presumibly none too happy he got to return and got his roll expanded. And I.. genuinely like the kid. I have nothing against Maggie and in fact poly ship her with both Luann and Benny, as both seem like they’d be open to that and her dour demanor creates a nice contrast between the chipper luann and the somewhat chipper but also chill benny in the middle. I just feel he’s a very likeable character, sweet and awkward and very much on Luann’s wavelength. Like Sam he’s SIMILAR to his love intrest, having Luann’s love of puns, mime and the theater, but is also not quite as giggly about it and as I said has a bit more of a chill to him, in contrast to how sam is slightly more energetic to Luna’s near constant calm off stage.

I also like him because he’s voiced by Sean Giabrone, an up and coming voice actor who I first met watching the Goldbergs as Adam. His other biggest role so far has been playing Jeff on Clarence, though he’s currently picked up another lead voice roll as Yumulack on Solar Opposites, easily one of the best parts of that show, and has done othe rminor and recurring work, but I feel he’s got the potetial to have a long and fruitful career in voice acting if he wants it. I mean he’s far from the first former ABC star or former Ron Stoppable to make a long and successful voice career of himself. Be the next will fredle man you can do it.

But yeah I like him and think their cute together and feel demonizing a ship for one that had a low chance of happening isn’t fair, especially when you know, we’re in a fandom where incest runs rampant and is STILL a recurring problem to this day. Pick your fucking battles for god’s sake. As I mentioned you can put maggie in with this relationship or Still ship luaggie regardless.

So back in the episode Luann and Coconuts notice Benny signing up for the school play and decide to join him.

Yeah i’ve noticed that a LOT of school set plots are about one of the mains joining a play to either be near or play romantic lead with their crush, or romantic hyjinks happening anyway. Seriously i’ts a lot. I DID think most of them were around romeo and juliet, and Proud Family, Pepper Anne, and Ned’s Declassified all are probably why, it’s actually way more diverse and i’m happy to give credit to shows and movies for that: Jimmy Neutron used Macbeth (IN SPACEEEEEE), American Dragon Jake Long used Antony and Cleopatra, as did the comic strip Foxtrot (That one I remembered), Daria used the canterbury tales, Arrested Development used Much Ado about Nothing, and one of my faviorite instances is the film Get Over it. It’s a cheesy as hell early 2000′s high school pg-13 comedy, that I loved as a teen and nos nostalgicaly love but am aware it has issues and some stitled acting as an adult where our hero joins the high school play in order to win his ex girlfriend back from the douchebag she’s seeing now and ends up falling for his best friend’s kid sister instead. They do a mid summer’ night’s dream, which is not only awesome SOMEONE thought to use that one , as the film has given me a special affection for the play.. but it’s a cheesy musical version written by the gloriously over acted director of the play played by martin short.

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My faviorite part of it is the boy band style number about Hermia. Yes really. And I didn’t even get into the fact Siquo is one of the main character’s best friends, Kristin Dunst had to reshoot a scene while making the first rami spider-man , our heroes weird parents who are sex therapists and have no real filter AND offer Coolio a threesome on their advice show, and yes the actual coolio and yes that was an actual person that existed, or best of all the douchey rival who stole our heroes girlfriend, whose not only a former boy band member whose band peformed the song love scud, but also threatens our hero with nunchucks at one point.

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Just see this movie.. i’ll hopefully talk about it some day.

Point is this kind of plot is stock.. but it’s the good kind you can do a lot of twists and turns with as every example mentioned, even the ones using the crush thing, had some clever twist or turn. And this one is no exception as we’ll see.

So we meet Ms. Berardo, the schools HAMMY as hell drama teacher who gives herself an entrance and is just wondrously entertaining throughout. She’s played by Grey Delise Griffin, which I could recognize immodestly and man does she bring it. Seriously bring her back. Wonderful character. So our heroine and her leading man audition and in a refreshing change of pace they do not get the lead rolls, instead a modern valley girl and a jock who writes his stuff on his arms do so instead. But since Bernado’s a bit nuts, she decides to have the Montagues and Capulets practice separately despite tha not making a ton of sense, to drive up tension and what not. I mean isolating an actor to drive up tension is a vallid technique but even having not read Romeo and Juliet since high school, over a decade ago, I can tell you they have several scenes together and this is a logistical nightmare. However our heroine finagles her way over to swapping camps so she can talk to Benny since honestly given the whole thing was a way to get to spend more time with him, she might as well quit otherwise. It also.. isn’t a bad tactic. She wants to know him before asking him out properly, which is fair and a good way to go, and they already know each other and are friendly, and it’s something she likes doing anyway as they were both involved with a play in his first appearance and her liking theater makes sense as she’s a comedian, and while she clearly prefers standup, it’s often a natural evolution to go fromt hat to acting in comedy stuff or making your own show, so it’s not a bad idea to learn that side of the buisness too.

So Luann FINALLY gets to talk to Benny.. after fast ball specialing mr coconuts in the way of someone trying to sit down

But we get a really cute moment as the two just.. talk like two dorky teenagers; They talk about the real mimes of la, which I want badly to be a show.. even if it’s just to find out what the Mime from Animaniacs is up to now. Where DID that guy go? Did the anvil finally kill him? These are the kinds of things that keep me up at night.. which is probably why I’m finishing this at 4 in the morning. But the two have genuine chemistry with Luann offering him her banana, phrasing, and making a pun he chuckles at. It’s adorable as all hell.

And Bernardo notices, and since her leads have no sparks she regretfully demotes them.. though their reaction is hilariously realistic as both are just happy to have less lines and walk off. She decides to cast Luann and Benny despite being freshman which would never happen but eh this is a unvierse with a snakebird and spies trying to destroy cherries with a death laser why I do I care two seasons later if two freshman got the leads in the play. Still I love the twist: our hero wasn’t trying to get the lead to creeiply force intamacy or anything.. the two just had natural chemistry and the director noticed that and wants to use it.

But while this should be great.. it isn’t as Luann keeps dodging actually kissing Benny when they rehearse the kiss. The reason.. is really frigging endearing. Luann simply hasn’t kissed anyone before, this will be her first.. and naturally she’s REALLY nervous about having it in front of a crowd or Benny thinking she’s a bad kisser. And I mean... while I had no personal experience at that age in kissing, most media and personal accounts detail it as awkward as fuck. But that’s the irony: she dosen’t KNOW it’s always awkward and thus is putting a ton of pressure on herself like anyone her age.

So she breaks under the pressure despite the reasurances of her Dummy/Possible Sign that she needs therapy and while she finds a way out the next Day Benny has aburbtly quit because of “chess club”.. which he’s not in. Luann finds him and talks to him about it, worried it’s her fault.. and she’s right, though Benny bowed out because she clearly wasn’t comfortable with him and didn’t want to make her kiss him when she clearly wasn’t comfortable with it. What a man what a man what a mighty good man. Luann TRIES to explain.. and then lets Mr Coconuts do it. Which usually in high school would lead to humilating rejection. instead Benny brings out his own puppet Mrs. Appleblossom.

Just those eyes.. black and souless.. like a doll’s eyes.. because htey are a doll’s eyes. So yeah Benny also has a puppet he uses to say the things he’s too nervous to say. Which is endearing even if again , KILL IT. KILL IT. I mean i’ts like tha tone guy from victorious if the puppets were actually charming and one of them looked like it was about to play hide the soul. Mrs. Appleblossom explains that Benny is also nervous and with the air cleared and the two realizing theyw ere nervous about the same thing... the inevitible happens

So that fades into the kiss happening on stage, with Luann’s family cheering her, our heroes take a fookin bow and Coconuts and Appleblossom look on.. and talk somehow...and somehow got in the seats on their own.

Stage Plight Final Thoughts: This episode.. is one of the series best, with great pacing, a low amount of repetition and a relatable conflict, while building up Luann’s love intrest to be a wonderful and engaging guy, and giving us a hell of a guest character and Mrs. Gerardo. This episod eis great, the chemistyr between Gambrone and Pucelli is fantastic. This one is just awesome and worth a look especially if the ship contrversy had hit you hard. It really is good. And there’s always room for benny. Until the next rainbow it’s been a pleasure.

#the loud house #lucy loud #luann loud #benny stein #lori loud #leni loud #lola loud #lincoln loud #rusty spokes #rocky spokes #valentine's day #animation #nickelodeon

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mabel-but-slytherin · 5 years

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Christmas Truce 2018

I know this is so very late, but like Danny I too can forget to prepare all of my Christmas gifts in time. I hope this is still on time for the Truce.

First a thank you to @monocheshaa for her wonderful gift for me, and a thank you/apology to @letswonderspirit for their patience! Based on the specific scene they asked for I think they were expecting art, but as I am a writer and cannot produce pictures with a fraction the beauty they can, you get this 3700 word fic instead. Enjoy!

Letswonderspirit asked for “Danny and Dani opening a present with Cujo inside. (If this is too specific than you can just do something with Cujo, I just really like dogs. thank you.)“

December 1st,

Danny Fenton walked through the Amity Park mall with a smile on his face for the first time in the month of December. He’d always hated the holiday spirit (spirits in general tended to haunt him or set his parents off, and Christmastime was no exception), but after being shown the Christmas Truce by Ghostwriter last year, Danny was determined to learn his lesson.

That wasn’t to say he didn’t come around to having a good holiday last year, but this time he was determined to get a head start on the season and do all the things he didn’t have the time and preparation to do. Namely, this year he wanted to be sure to get presents.

Being a first-time Christmas shopper, Danny was worried he’d have a hard time finding the time to sneak away from everyone and buy fitting gifts behind their backs. Yet it was not even 3pm on the first of the month and Danny already had half of his shopping done. New steel-toed black boots for Sam, a kit to build the first custom PDA-compatible laptop for Tucker, and most recently a memoir by the head of Harvard’s psychology department for Jazz.

Even making time wasn’t so hard. All Danny had to do was tell his friends that he wanted to catch up on homework before the next ghost attack and they gave him pleased but dubious looks and sent him home. Once there, Danny had no problem: he was a pro at sneaking out of the house under his parents’ noses. Slip one small hint of a Santa sighting at the mall two towns over and Maddie was dashing to her bazooka awhile Jack ran for his Fenton™ Wish List.

Speaking of lists, Danny pulled out his list of people left to shop for and crossed Jazz’s name off. Looking down he knocked off Mom and Dad while he was at it. Mom did most of the family shopping and would definitely prefer something home-made and deadlier than what he could buy at 16 years old, so he’d just spend some time in the lab putting together some gadget throughout the month. Dad was probably the easiest of all: he’d pulled his mom aside last week while he helped serve Thanksgiving dinner and asked if they could work together to make double fudge this year. The squeal and hug his mom gave was almost another gift itself.

That just left some of his other classmates, and honestly, although Danny was trying to make up for years of missing the Christmas spirit even he admitted they were probably optional. Dash definitely wasn’t getting anything from Fenton, as the only thing Danny could think he’d like is 20 minutes to wail on Fenturd with no chance of Lancer catching him (and telling him to save his arm strength for the big game Friday).

Sam told Danny that under no circumstances should he buy a present for Paulina, but Danny couldn’t help himself, and felt pretty proud to have found a Danny Phantom compact mirror in the makeup section of the mall and then transformed briefly in the changing room to autograph it in green sharpie. (He later told Sam he found the present while looking in the make-up section for an eyeliner for Sam’s Goth look. He still doesn’t understand why Sam tested her new steel toes on his shins when he told her his first thought was that Paulina would love it.)

And of course getting a gift for Paulina meant he had to pull something together for at least a couple other people or else risk coming across as creepy. Star just needed something fashionable and shiny, and given that Danny knew nothing about fashion he just went for shiny earrings and hoped she wouldn’t hit him. He probably didn’t need to get anything for Wes, but let’s just say a whole day walking through Amity Park mall revealed so many potential gag t-shirts that Danny couldn’t resist.

Valerie would be both the easiest and hardest to shop for. She was extremely practical ever since her dad lost her job, and would happily accept any homecooked treat or mall store gift card, but Danny also wanted to give her something more meaningful without being frivolous. Danny wanted to give her a box of tree-shaped sugar cookies and a matching Christmas tree sweater, but when the ecto-oven brought the cookies to life and Danny took them out with the closed Fenton™ pistol, the teen settled for giving her the sweater and the pistol instead.

A bead of sweat ran down Danny’s face as he imagined what her reaction would be to that…

With all the humans crossed off his list, Danny was ready to call it a day. Over a year of being a halfa had taught him better than to guess at ghost traditions, so his plan was to fly over to Ghostwriter’s next week to ask for advice on presents for the Truce before the scribe was too deep into the holiday rush. There were a bunch of things Danny wanted to ask, from prospective gifts to whether he should be getting something for just his allies or his nemeses, and how a good hit or faux pas might impact his survival in the coming year. No matter what, Danny had already swore he would take a hard pass on getting a gift for Vlad. Half-ghost he may be, that man was a full-blooded fruitloop and would inevitably read way into anything from Danny.

The young hero already started to fold the list to put in his pocket when his eyes froze on one last name scrawled at the bottom of his list with a question mark. It was no question that Danny cared about the last name and wanted to give her a nice Christmas, the only question was whether she would be there to receive it.

After all, Dani had stopped by every couple of months ever since she was stabilized and free to travel the world, but it was purposefully near-impossible to contact the young girl on the run, and Danny had no clue if she even knew of the holiday. Even if she did, there was the question of whether she would come visit him or celebrate abroad.

Either way, it was Dani’s first Christmas and she was Danny’s clone, which meant it was Danny’s responsibility to find her the perfect present just in case she stopped by, right? Well, ghost etiquette was one thing, but Danny had no idea who to ask on clone etiquette so as the older clone/brother in this situation he was going to call himself the expert and go with that.

That just left one major problem: what could a sixteen-year-old teenager from the Midwest who already burned half his allowance on other presents get for a half-ghost pickpocket whose already flown halfway around the world?

Two laps around the mall later and Danny was still stumped. Flashy clothes from most of the girly stores were flimsy and would only make her stand out. Anything bigger than a bag was too bulky to carry, any electronic device Danny would have to make sure she could use and charge it, and also pray there was no tracking to put her on someone’s radar. Money or gift cards was impractical and would probably look to her like a moral lecture, and while Danny briefly considered a souvenir from Amity Park as a good gag, the teen was embarrassed by how they probably paled in comparison to all the ones she’s probably seen.

Danny sighed and just decided to make his way home. The homework/mall Santa distractions would only buy him so much time and he still had a few weeks to finalize ideas, so there was no need to rush.

A piercing scream burst out throughout the mall and the cry of “GHOST!” made Danny groan and wonder where he could possibly stash his latest purchases before the next fight, as he highly doubted the Truce extended all the way to early bird shopping. Then a bark followed and Danny gave a sigh of relief. “Cujo! Get out of there!”

Maybe there wouldn’t be a fight after all.

December 24th,

Danny had been wondering how far the Christmas Truce stretched. Apparently, the answer was not until the stroke of midnight Christmas Day.

Or at least that’s what Skulker thought, coming after Danny shouting that his pelt would make such a nice gift to Ember that she’d have to accept his proposal. Danny wasn’t quite sure how to respond to that, and was currently trying to either wrestle him into the Thermos or run out the clock.

Of course, Danny also didn’t want to risk getting on the bad side of the entire Ghost Zone by violating the Truce and continuing to fight on Christmas morning. Skulker had the advantage of a mechanical exoskeleton featuring a timepiece, but Danny had to try to keep him somewhere that he had a view of the Amity Times clocktower.

That and the desire to minimize property damage on Christmas Eve left Danny stuck in the wide open space of the park. Which makes hiding and dodging Skulker’s myriad of bombs and nets a challenge.

“Seriously Skulker, you haven’t been able to catch me in over two years! Did you really think you would be able to capture me in under an hour?” Danny taunted as he evaded yet another cannon blast that expanded into a taser net shortly after passing over his shoulder.

“Quiet, welp! The best hunter knows how to claim victory under pressure!”

Danny paused before firing an ectoblast at Skulkers torso. “I thought the saying was ‘a great hunter knows how to bide his time…’”

“…And seize an opportunity.” Skulker finished as he took advantage of Danny’s distraction to pull out a small pistol and shoot the Fenton thermos out of his left hand. Danny cursed and rubbed his burnt hand as he watched the thermos fly halfway across the park.

“Yes, I quite like the saying.” Skulker continued. “Speaking of like, I also must admit I am enjoying this new pistol! You see, Ember and I have started this family tradition where we open one small present each on Christmas Eve, and I just happened to get this little thing. I can’t wait until tomorrow to open the other present under the tree, it’s shaped like a blaster and bigger than the tree itself!”

Danny shivered. “Okay, first off, I guess that explains the sudden Christmas Eve manhunt. Second, please never talk to me about you and Ember’s ‘family traditions’ ever again. Already imagined one messed up ghost couple future, don’t need another one.

“Third,” Danny said as he glanced between where his thermos went flying and Skulker preparing another round from the net launcher, “I don’t really want to be Christmas dinner. Let’s go back to the original plan of Christmas duck-duck-goose!”

Danny made a break in the direction of the thermos, then banked into a sharp curve as Skulker fired the net right behind him. The net again sailed past him as Skulker fell for the feint and carried on in the direction of the open field near the thermos.

Until a small green blur dashed across the grass towards where the thermos was lying.

Recognizing the ghostly green glow but too far to see the shape, Danny could only wonder either who would show up in the human world this close to Christmas Day or when Skulker got a hunting partner.

The figure’s identity was made apparent when it finished trotting over to the thermos, picked it up in its mouth, and let out a happy bark.

“Cujo!” Danny called. The small ghost dog wagged his tail and looked over in Danny’s direction.

“Oh wow, you must want to play fetch. Good boy, Cujo, bring the thermos over here!” Danny turned his spectral tail back into human (ghostly?) legs and patted them to further call Cujo over. The dog started trotting happily until it yelped as a third net flew by and tangled it in the grass.

“Phantom has a puppy?” Skulker wondered aloud. “And one that is fearless in the face of battle? You will make the finest gift to Ember this holiday! She will cement you as one of her cutest fans and I will train you into the Ghost Zone’s Greatest Hunting Dog! Skulker shouted as he flew over towards Cujo.

Cujo just ignored Skulker and started trying to drag the net towards where Danny was running to him. Skulker shook his head at the sight and reached towards his controls for the taser net. “First, to teach you some obedience.”

As soon as he turned the dial to its lowest setting, the net turned on and started to zap Cujo lightly. This caused the dog to yelp, and then grow angry.

And then to just grow.

Within seconds, Cujo stood tall in his full, monstrous height. The net snapped off of the dog now twice its size, and the freed prey turned his eyes directly onto Skulker.

“Oh no.” The hunter muttered.

Cujo charged towards Skulker as the mechanical ghost tried to fly away, and managed to close the distance in time to grab on to one of Skulker’s jet boots and pull it off like a 20-foot puppy stealing a stranger’s shoe. The ghost dog had just finished shaking the lone boot and turned to the sky to growl and the figure trying to balance with one-sided rocket propulsion when the clocktower struck midnight.

In a flash, Cujo shrunk back down to his puppy size and panted up at Skulker, tossing the boot around for a second before lying down and gnawing it like the advanced ghostly technology was his latest chew toy.

Skulker, realizing it was safe to land, crashed back down to the grass and tried to approach Cujo to retrieve his boot. Cujo remained in puppy form, but instantly grabbed the shoe and backed away, growling menacingly that the shoe was his.

“Oh, come now!” Skulker shouted. “It’s Christmas.”

“And that is his toy your trying to take, Grinch.” Danny smiled as he walked over and scratched Cujo behind the ears. Seeing Skulker’s frown, Danny sighed and slowly pulled the metal boot out of Cujo’s mouth before throwing the thermos to distract him. The dog happily ran after the thermos, leaving Danny to shake the pool of saliva off the boot before handing it back to Skulker.

“Just this once, because it’s Christmas.” Danny said.

Skulker grabbed the boot and shoved it on his foot before grimacing and the squelching sound it made. “Ugh. Fine, I accept your gift and will be prepared to make an honorable exchange for this gift at the Truce this evening. Merry Christmas, Whel- I mean, Danny.”

Danny smiled. “You’re welcome Skulker.” The teen nodded before grimacing himself. “Wait… gift exchange… Danny… I totally forgot to get a present for Dani!”

Skulker tilted his head. “You exchange presents between your two halves? That is… an odd halfa tradition I was not aware of.”

“No!” Danny shouted. “Not for me, other Dani! Man, I was planning on getting her something all month, but time totally flies.”

Danny turned around to see that Skulker had already flew back towards FentonWorks and the Ghost Portal while his back was turned. “Guess that’s not the only thing that flew by. And I gotta fly home myself.”

“Woof!” Danny looked down to see Cujo triumphantly wagging his tail over the Fenton Thermos lying at Danny’s feet. Looking around and seeing no other ghosts to take him back to the Ghost Zone, Danny scooped the little dog into his arms and start flying back towards home.

“You travel all over the place, Cujo, maybe you can help me? What present can I get for my clone/cousin who’s been all around the world and just grabs whatever she wants?”

December 25th,

Danny woke up the next morning to see a pair of nearly identical blue eyes perched over him, shining with a burst of holiday joy that Danny himself had never felt until this month.

“Good morning, Danny!” Dani cried out, “Guess what day it is?!”

“I don’t know,” Danny bit out teasingly as he laughed at her excitement, “Christmas?”

“Yeah!” Dani shouted, causing her original to just laugh at her even more. “Hey, I have a right to be excited, this is my first one!”

Danny just smiled. “In a way, this is my first one too.

“I’m glad you’re here and all, but what are you doing in my room?” Danny asked his clone.

Dani shrugged. “Well, everywhere I’ve been people are saying Christmas is time to spend with your family. And given that the rest of my family doesn’t know I exist, I can’t really go downstairs.”

Danny frowned at that, before seeing the matching expression on his younger clone’s face and realizing that his job for today is to make her smile. “I guess that just means we have to do the present exchange up here then before Mom and Dad wake up, and you can hang around the rest of the day invisibly. Let me go get Jazz so she can join us.”

That worked, and Dani’s face stretched into a grin for a moment before she paused. “Wait,” Dani said, “present exchange?”

At Danny’s nod she groaned. “Oh no! I forgot to get you guys anything!”

To her surprise, Danny just laughed. “Don’t sweat it!” He consoled her, “this is actually the first year I’ve been able to get everyone a present. We’ll just have you open your presents, and then you can tell Jazz and I all the cool stories about places you’ve been!”

Dani smiled again at this, missing Danny reaching under his bed to grab her present box before he slipped out the door to wake Jazz. He had just a couple finishing touches to put on her gift before he returned.

The three teens sat tightly together on Danny’s bed as both Fentons passed their wrapped presents over to Dani.

“Oooh, ooh, open mine first!” Jazz exclaimed, still able to get childishly excited about every holiday.

Dani obliged and started ripping the tape off of the elaborately wrapped package, before watching Jazz wince at the destruction of her wrapping perfection and attempting to pry to tape open without damaging the paper. A second later had the young clone groaning in frustration before slapping her head and phasing the paper right off.

Once the paper was gone, Dani awed over the beautiful ribbon in her hand. It perfectly matched the one Jazz wore in her hair with the exception of its dark red color that was the exact shade of Dani’s sweatshirt. Dani held it up to her hair and giggled and Jazz leaned across her lap to tie it, the young clone’s arms reaching out to pull Jazz into a hug when the older girl was done.

“Thank you so much Jazz! I love it!” Dani squealed as she squeezed tighter.

“You’re welcome!” Jazz replied. “I’m so glad you love it! I figured it would fit under your hood when you wanted to hide away somewhere, and that no matter where you are in this world or the Ghost Zone, we’ll match!”

Dani reached up to feel the ribbon and her grin stretched even wider. “I’ll just have to figure out a way to get it to stay on in my ghost form.”

Jazz smiled, and then let her expression shift into a smirk. “Or… you could just wear this one.” She said coyly, reaching into her pajama pocket to pull out another ribbon, this one ghostly green.

The two girls squealed and hugged yet again, and Danny hoped his gift would be just as well received. “Well Dani,” he said, passing over a wrapped box.

“Here’s your gift from me. I would just untie the bow and open the box rather than phase it out.”

Dani took that as permission to rip right into it and within seconds was raising the lid and getting ready to look inside. She was interrupted by a small yip.

“Danny!” Jazz shouted, aghast. “There were no air holes on there!”

Danny smirked, “Her gift doesn’t need it.”

Dani froze as she looked down into the box, further deepening Jazz’s puzzled expression. A second later Dani reached both hands into the box and pulled out a playfully panting Cujo.

“Oh my god Danny, this is amazing!”

“His name’s Cujo,” Danny told his clone as she cuddled Cujo up to her face and laughed when Cujo licked her. “He’s run through Amity Park a couple of times looking to play, but is always just going from place to place. I figured with each other you both might be less lonely.”

Cujo seemed to take that cue to look up and down Danielle, see the big red bow tied in her hair, and happily bark like he had just received his own half-human for Christmas.

Dani smiled so wide she nearly cried and had to place Cujo on the floor in order to make room for the giant hug she gave her clone/cousin. Cujo of course objected to the sudden lack of warmth and made it known by growing to his full size, prompting Dani to shout “Awesome!” and hug Danny even harder.

Danny just grinned and basked in Dani’s happiness. Yeah, sometimes the only thing to give someone who has the world is someone to share it with, and he was so glad that the two looked like they would be happy together.

They were so happy, that that very afternoon the Red Huntress came out chasing complaints of a giant green ghost dog roaming Amity Park, hoping to finally get revenge on the ghost boy for ruining her life. She was stunned to instead find Danielle riding in the ghost dog’s fur, laughing and hollering and shouting that this was the best Christmas ever.

For once in her career Valerie decided to let a ghost go, figuring that out of everyone, the ghost girl deserved to be happy on Christmas day. She was sure Mayor Masters would forgive her for taking a day off to spend with the her family. Even if the ghost dog pooped on his front lawn.

That was the moment Dani swore she and Cujo would be friends for life. The had a whole world to travel together, and a whole afterlifetime of Christmases to do it.

#danny phantom #christmas truce #christmas truce 2018 #letswonderspirit #dani phantom #cujo

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