#the real whumper was our own internal dialogue all along

[whump-queen]

“You’re better than this.”

[tw angst, depression, self-hatred, sort of a whumper-caretaker combo, implied suicidal ideation if you squint]

They felt their throat close up.

Was this supposed to feel like a pep talk?

They could read between the lines, you know. They weren’t that thick. They could hear the sentences finish in their head.

‘You’re pathetic. You’re lazy—’

“I—I know." Their throat clenched down again, the muscles tightening and squeezing around their words. They nearly grimaced at the sound of their own broken voice.

As if to prove them right.

“Hey. Look at me.”

The edge of frustration in that tone sent their emergency signals on edge. They lifted their gaze from that spot on the floor.

Whumper could see them fully now, and whumpee loathed how they must have looked right then—eyes brimming with tears, trying hard not to blink—god forbid the heavy drops breach their eyelashes and make everything worse.

Whumper grabbed them by the shoulders, their frustration boiling over, and shook them hard. Whumpee's voice cracked.

"Come on, snap out of it!"

“You know you’re better than this. You know you are—fuck, I know you are.“

They felt the tears now, streaking their cheeks and cooling in the chill of the room.

'Look at how far you’ve fallen.'

Whumper's tone grew more frantic now, that frustrated edge in their voice giving way to a full on desperate anger—

“Come ON— where did that FIRE go?”

'What the hell happened to you?'

“you used to be so—“

What— so strong? So self-assured? So confident?

. .

Was I?

Was that why you first fell for me?

It’s been so long. I can barely remember now.

.

Was that why you looked at me so differently that night, all those years ago?

With all the reverence and adoration in the world in your eyes—

as if you'd raze everything to the ground at my feet.

Please—tell me what it was— What did you see in me?

What did you see when you looked at me like that?

What was I like?

Please—please tell me—I—I cant find it anymore—

Whumper released their shoulders, turning away exasperated.

“Nobody’s gonna pull you up but you now.”

Whumpee curled in on themselves, the sobs were impossible to hold back now.

'You've got no one but yourself.'

Too much.

It hurts.

'Nobody but a person you despise.'

They let the tears fall willingly now, grieving something they could barely grasp.

That person they must've once been—they felt no more real than a ghost now.

Long dead.

They couldn’t do it anymore.

It hurt to remember.

It hurt to grieve.

Please.

Let them melt into the walls.

Let somebody find them in a week.

• • •

if you need therapy like me you can read more terrible angsty shit here:

Regrets | Tile | In the blur of the rain

#tf when u just— #*cries* #ammirite guys haha #whump drabble #angst whump #sad shit #angst #whump writing #my writing #tw mental health #depression #self hatred #tw depression #idk prolly more tags but #no energy rn so #lmk if I missed anything #pffft lmfao #when u get whumped by ur own brain pffskskdjfj #the real whumper was our own internal dialogue all along #✨✨✨ #rip that this is the first drabble i’ve posted in ages and it’s this shit #will be back with your regularly scheduled power trip content shortly 😭