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vividsekai · 2 years

Note

the youngest tenma (the one you wrote hcs about) with toya?? headcanons and platonic please :))

touya + tenma!reader

— [🌸] character/s. aoyagi touya

contents. platonic headcanons, fluffff

info. gn!reader, touya's adopted into the tenma family basically. word count: 726

authors note HI ANON IM SO SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG WITH THIS SJJDJD i got stuck in writers block for awhile 😭 i had some trouble with this so please tell me if this isnt to your liking!!! also there might be some typos since i had to rewrite it so please ignore thatt

the mentioned post

oh, the sun.

is what he thinks to himself when he sees you together with your siblings

news flash, aoyagi touya has a soft spot for you. you were one of the first people he befriended and the way you always tried to cheer him up back when he was still tied into doing classical music meant a lot to him. the both of you first met during one of the piano recitals your brother was attending and touya was also taking part in it, so when you stuck your head through the door of the room he was in and immediately just. sat beside him on the stool and introduced yourself eagerly and he was eventually able to call you his 'friend', he was grateful. he always looks back at the memory fondly (*´ω｀*) also, heres a not-so-secret of his. he sees you as his little sib too! who would've guessed

its literally so adorable seeing the both of you together saki and kasa are on the verge of tearing up

having a hard time studying? no worries, if he's free he'll help you with them! oh, you're having trouble with getting a plushie out of a claw machine? THATS OKAY!!!! here's the plushie that you wanted + 10 others that magically appeared out of thin air while touya was playing the claw machine. you could've sworn you heard the staff panicking behind the counter. nice job touya!

he invites you to the events vbs participates in! an and kohane are always so excited to see you in the crowd and akito just rolls his eyes at them but waves at you as a greeting anyways. touya's just happy that the people he's closest with get along well

speaking of people he's closest with, you drag him to a lot of the tenma outings. the more the merrier!!!

+ these things include: going around all the shops in vivid street, absolutely WRECKING tsukasa in ddr games, and shopping trips. (one of you has to do the work of carrying sakis shopping bags. goodluck lol)

in general going to the arcade is a staple of your guys' hangouts. sometimes when you're walking with touya to school and pass by it, you physically have to stop him from going inside becAUSE TOUYA CLASS STARTS IN 20 MINUTES WAIT HOLD ON

during the hanamatsuri festival, touya noticed something was off between you and tsukasa. he asked you what the problem and got the context on how saki and tsukasa got in a fight and you're not sure how to resolve it because this whole thing started because of a misunderstanding.

once he gets the full story, he, along with the help on honami bring the three of you back together! he really doesn't wanna see your crestfallen look ever again. plus, he wanted your siblings to make up again so </3

you guys are eachothers go-to for asking advice. if he needs help with some stuff, he always ends up approaching you first and you do the same with him! reliable big brother vibes JSJDJ

i'd like to add, after the fight he had with akito during vbs main story, you were the first person to notice and so, you made it your mission of the day to take his mind off of that and try to cheer him up. saki and tsukasa also tagged along and it ended up working! but also kinda didn't because he still looked upset by what happened. nudging him over, you told touya to go back and to talk to akito about it. you knew how important they were to eachother and you are NOT letting this slide over. go back boy!!!! listening to him talking about how he's part of a group unit now with 3 other people after the issue was resolved, he saw the biggest smile on your face and returned it with his own one too. PRECIOUS.

anyways. if he ever hears someone talking shit he WILL give them the nastiest glare he can muster. (it might be scary the first couple of seconds but he ends up looking like a cat to you after awhile /j). he's also the first one to hold you back if you're on the verge of throwing hands

in conclusion: tenma siblings so scrimblo. i will put you all in my pocket

#project sekai x reader #proseka x reader #aoyagi touya x reader #touya x reader #aoyagi toya x reader #toya x reader #es. writes #🐇. requests

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vanillamilkcloud · 4 years

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UNDER THE TREE || RM

pairing: Single Dad! RM x Baker! Reader

word count: 2,497

tags: fluff, some cookies were burnt, flour got in some spots, theres hot cocoa, domestic as hell, christmas obviously.

summary: after a visit to their favorite baker, Namjoon cant wrap presents for his boys. so with snagging your number some previous hours ago he decides to call for some help.

Kids were always hard, no matter what anyone did to try and help. Especially having two and also being a single dad. Though Namjoon had a way with the two that almost everyone wished they had with their kids. He had coaxed the boys into waking up this morning only to have them instantly asking about going to the bakery. It had become a sort of routine, once a week he’d show up at the door and instantly Hoseok would babble about everything he wanted while Yoongi pointed to things while hiding behind Namjoon’s leg.

And that was exactly your situation right now. Covered in flour, and some frosting on your cheek, standing behind the counter of the store.

“I want this and this and a cake pop and cake!” Hoseok giggled happily, his gloved hands pressed against the glass happily. Namjoon looked at you apologetically before glancing at what his son wanted.

“Cookie, you know you cant have all of that-” The blonde male had only started to speak before he saw you walking around the counter, handing the 4 year old a cake pop. At 8am, might you add. His baby voice was too hard to resist giving the sweets to him.

“Says who?” You gave an equal smile to the toddler’s as he squealed.

“Thank you noona!” He had already devoured the sweet in a happy fit of giggles. You couldn’t help but giggle at the bits of chocolate around his mouth. For a moment you had thought you heard Yoongi speak, only to be correct as he held his arms up. Namjoon chuckled softly.

“Sugar, what are you doing?”

“I want up.” He murmured, taking his chance to hide behind you now. You shrugged then picked up the small boy. Yoongi had instantly nuzzled into your chest, his little cheeks red from the cold. It made you frown though you knew you couldn’t help it.

“Can I give them mini mugs of hot cocoa Joonie?” You asked, fluttering your eyes in that way you knew would make Namjoon give into you. He let out a small groan as you looked absolutely perfect to him right now, and like the kids were actually both of yours. But Namjoon hadn’t had the courage to ask you yet to see if this relationship could actually.. be something. He had to think about plenty of other things right now besides having his bed warm again, and the boys having a mom finally.

“Do you even have mini mugs?”

You grinned happily before nodding, walking behind the counter with Yoongi in your arms and Hoseok trailing behind you. It was a bit hard to lean downward before pulling out two baby mugs and some straws. You put them on the counter carefully. “I got them just for these two little dudes. Just make sure to bring them when you guys come.”

Yoongi made grabby hands at one of them, so you let him take the cup. His eyes held a type of curiousity you hadn’t ever actually seen in him. The boy was generally shy and quiet but you seemed to understand now how Namjoon managed to know what he wanted constantly. It was rather cute in your eyes as you could catch Hoseok almost drooling over all the pastries behind the glass, and then whining as he wanted up too. You couldnt carry the both of them though.

Namjoon on the other hand, was more than happy with his open fawning over you. You were such an angel with the boys and it made him more than happy with his trips. Hoseok was more than ready to expose his dad though.

“Daddy staring!” He giggled brightly, looking up to his dad through the glass. It caused a chain reaction as Yoongi was more than happy to join in. “Does dada like noona?”

A bright blush covered the male’s cheek in an instant. He was quick to recover though as you couldnt help but to laugh while filling up the two mugs, hanging mini candy canes off the edge. “No, I dont like _____ Sugar.” Namjoon replied.

“Not what Uncle Jinnie said!”

Namjoon facepalmed, shaking his head with a groan. He’d need to have a serious talk with that man later. “Uncle Jinnie tricked you okay? What do you want for breakfast?”

That seemed to change the topics easily, you placing the hot chocolates in Namjoon’s hands to cool off before letting the boys point while behind the glass. Both of them seemed rather happy to have your candy cane donuts, the one treat youd serve only on Christmas Eve and Christmas. Namjoon had asked for his usual strawberry bagel with cream cheese, so then you were free to go back to the kitchen once more.

“Byebye noona!!” The boys called out, making you grin.

“Youll see me next week, this isnt bye babies!” You replied. Namjoon couldnt help but laugh as the two were instantly excited all over again. Except, he came here to do something too, so he came up to the window to your kitchen quickly.

“Wait, ___,” The blonde seemed shy, but you couldn’t help but to smile at him.

“Did you forget something?”

He gave you a nod, and you looked at him curiously. “I forgot your number, can you give it to me again?”

The words that fell out of his mouth made you laugh, as you had essentially walked into him saying that yet you still felt dumbfounded. How was he that smooth? "Mm, give me your phone then, I'll put it in."

Namjoon complied with the words as he was smiling happily; a few of the customers in the store seemed to only cheer for him. You wanted to run away from the situation but you couldn't deny him like that! On Christmas Eve either, you had no hope. Within a few moments you handed the phone back with a bit of flour over the case.

"Oh lord, I'm sorry. I didnt mean to get flour on it."

"Don't be," Namjoon grinned. "Im used to you leaving flour prints on what you touch by now."

He gave you a wave, and went back to his kids. You hummed softly as you went into the back of the store before finding yourself trying to quietly squeal. Namjoon had actually asked you for your number! What you didn't know was that everyone had actually heard your little squeal, and it couldnt help but make everyone laugh as you fawned over your crush. Everyone knew for ages that you both had a thing for each other and now it seemed to get somewhere.

After a long day at work, and perhaps burning a few things in your distraction, you’ve finally made it home. The call of your bed seems almost instantly heeded. But there’s other things you need to do.

Namjoon, on the other hand, is struggling to wrap presents. He had taken quite some time just to wrap simple box shapes and now this gift wrapping thing seemed impossible to him. There was blankets and stuffed animals to be wrapped still, along with pillows and bed sheets that Hoseok had wanted because of them being PJ Mask themed. It was also an issue of he didn’t happen to have enough paper to finish wrapping anything. The blonde combed a hand through his hair with a soft groan; He couldn’t leave the house to get any extra paper because then nobody was home with the boys. The male also didn’t want to leave them with anyone, so he scrolled through his phone contacts, clicking your name with a soft hum.

“Hello?” You asked, clearly a bit tired so Namjoon was almost tempted to hang up then and there.

“Hey _____.” He chuckled softly as he once again couldnt figure out how to wrap the damned elephant plushie.

“Oh, hi Joonie! What’s up?”

“I, um, well. I can’t wrap the kids presents so I thought you might be able to help. I don’t happen to have any paper or that left either, and I cant leave to get any.” Namjoon sighed softly as he tossed the paper in the trash once again, leaning against the sofa as he sat on the floor. “I swear I’ll pay you back for it, I just didn’t know who else to call.”

You giggled through the line, pretending to think in silence. It was almost audible how nervous he was. “I can come help. Can you text me your address then?”

“Yeah I can, thank you so much.”

The line went dead after that, as Namjoon sent you their address. He took the opportunity to go check on the boys. It had to be quick because Yoongi was a light sleeper unless Hoseok happened to move into his bed. Namjoon was certain those two would be inseperable later on, so he never bothered to seperate them. He opened the door quietly after making sure the hall light was off, only to chuckle as the boys were indeed under one blanket. With similar quietness he shut the door once again before walking to the kitchen and starting to brew a pot of coffee. The father didn’t happen to have any more hot chocolate either right now, as much as he knew you had a preference for the drink.

Namjoon let his thoughts wonder about you as he drew two mugs out of the cabinet, and not mini ones this time. The house was quiet besides the gentle christmas songs playing on the radio. Gingerbread had filled the air as hours ago the boys insisted to make gingerbread men for Santa, even left out with the milk on a plate with their notes. They were such precious things to him, the father felt a bit sad to realize that this is what their mother had decide to miss out on. But he also was happy because she wasn’t the type of woman to enjoy this type of stuff. She’d simply go about her business as she please. It was like a household housing two seperate families.

The knock on the door pulled Namjoon out of his mind, and he quickly answered it before you could knock again. Snow had covered your hat, the bits of your hair that decided to peek out under it, and on your shoulders. He was quick to let you in, even taking the bags of gift wrap and tape and perhaps a gift for each of the boys.

“Thank you so much-” He smiled warmly, rubbing his temples as he sat the bags on the sofa. You shook your head at him.

“Don’t thank me you dork. I’m more than happy to help you with anything.” The words were perhaps a bit more implying than what either of you cared to admit, but Namjoon was still happy none the less. Once you were free of your extra layers you took out the rolls of gift wrap and tape. You also made sure to put your gifts under the tree too.

Namjoon watched as you didnt bother to speak in your focus now. He couldn’t help but to admire your small form in his living room, almost expertly wrapping each thing he had struggled with. You simply didn’t want him to notice the bright blush on your cheeks. It made you excited to actually be here as much as it didn’t feel the same without the boys. You had spent so much time around them as a group that you felt shy when you both were alone.

“Here’s some coffee, since the boys drank all the hot chocolate.” Namjoon’s voice made you squeak, and he couldnt help but laugh brightly. His grin made his dimples show; you wanted to kiss him right there but you knew better.

“Thank you.” You whispered. The girly girl in you was practically squealing with how close he was. A yawn passed Namjoon’s lips as your hands held the elephant plushie that he didn’t have patience for only about an hour ago. He looked tired, but he didn’t want to have you leave. Your fingers worked in a quick motion to wrap it like a giant candy. WIth the use of scissors you even made the ends all pointy.

“Ill put them under, you can stay the night if you want.” Namjoon hummed, watching you look up at him curiously. The face you held seemed to depict that you were nervous to him. “I won’t do anything, at least right now.”

“What do you mean right now?” You looked more puzzled now. Namjoon facepalmed as he realized the words slipped before he had stopped it.

“Um, well, you see.” He started off, once again making you chuckle. You couldn’t read him often but this seemed to be one of the rare moments you could. Kim Namjoon was embarrassed and he couldnt change the topic. Hoseok and Yoongi were often his way of avoiding conversations like these with you. But they were fast asleep. “Consider it your Christmas present, but I’ve liked you for quite some time now. The boys even like you too. It means the damn world to me because I love those two to death and they almost always get excited as soon as I mention you.”

You couldn’t help but to blush with his confession, but it made you grin none the less. “Are we sure that isn’t because I give them sugar every time they come?”

Both of you exchanged a bright laugh at the words. The boys were only 4 and 5, of course sugar could buy their hearts in an instant. Namjoon couldn't help but to smile at you in such a pure adoration.

“No, because they dont touch much of the pastries we have unless we make them ourselves, or we got them from you.” The father replied. “And also, I’ve known you’ve liked me for awhile.”

This was your turn to groan. “Since when!” You whined, rubbing your temple with your fingers.

“The squeal when you gave me your number. I had just gotten up to leave with the boys when I heard it.”

You pouted softly, knowing that was probably the most obvious of times that you definetely had something for him. This you couldn’t try to deny either. “Okay fine, perhaps I’ve liked you for awhile now too.”

Namjoon smiled brightly, pulling you into a hug. There was something different about this though. It felt much more warm and loving than when he would be forced to hug you because of his kids. Only when you yawned did he realize you really needed to go to sleep, so he picked you up without a warning. The simple action made your heart swell as you realized this was probably one of the best things to happen just in time for the holidays.

#try 2 to post this #namjoon #namjoon imagine #bts x reader #bts #bts fanfic #bts rm #we love domestic relationships #whole shit load of fluff

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minijenn · 5 years

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And now, cause im bored, here's every chapter of Keys briefly summed up in just a few words each (possible spoilers ahead??)

Prologue: The Thirteen Keys: MoM fucks with his students, what else is new

Chapter 1: Remaining Recusant: Riku rescues his boyfriend through the power of Gay

Chapter 2: To Guard the Light: Bunch of boring lore but Sokai makes it worth it

Chapter 3: To Seek the Darkness: Organization shenanigans; Vanitas divorces his shitty, abusive not-dad

Chapter 4: Hero to Zero: Uhhhhh fuckin' Hercules or somethin idk

Chapter 5: Go the Distance: Rage Mode angst is Fun

Chapter 6: Wandering in the Dark: Riku gets a haircut in the Realm of Darkness and Sora really needs to stop lying to everyone

Chapter 7: Promising Beginnings: Kairi and Lea are forced to wear a "get along" shirt

Chapter 8: Lazy Afternoon Streets: Sora has an Identity Crisis part 1

Chapter 9: At Dusk: YA STUPID ORG XIII FUCKHEADS BEST LEAVE MY SON ALONE OR ELSE ILL THROW HANDS

Chapter 10: Sinister Whispers: ^^^ BASICALLY THAT AGAIN ONLY I MEAN IT THIS TIME

Chapter 11: You've Got a Friend in Me: Being a living toy has gotta create some sorta existential crisis, right?

Chapter 12: To Infinity and Beyond: JEN IS GONNA THROW HANDS WITH YOUNG XEHANORT I SWEAR TO GOD I AM

Chapter 13: Chase the Shadows: Detectives Mickey and Riku play a round of "Where's Terra?" And fail miserably

Chapter 14: Paradise Found: Fun with Balloons and Grumpy Geriatrics

Chapter 15: Adventure is Out There: Sora may or may not fall to his death from ridiculously high up in the air i dont fuckin know

Chapter 16: Unspoken, Unheard: Kairi writes Sora a bunch of letters cause she loves him so much but wont say it cause she shy ahah

Chapter 17: How Far I'll Go: MOANA AND SORA ARE MY NEW BROTP

Chapter 18: Know Who You Are: Vanitas gets yeeted by the Ocean cause he a naughty boyo

Chapter 19: The Streets of San Fransokyo: Sora doesnt understand how Technology works what else is new?

Chapter 20: Immortals: everything's all fun and games until Sora's dumbass self-sacrifical complex kicks in (again)

Chapter 21: Depths of Despair: LOOKS LIKE I GOTTA THROW HANDS WITH MALEFICENT NOW TOO

Chapter 22: Rise and Fall and Rise Again: Sora and Kairi hang out and DAMMIT JUST KISS ALREADY YOU DORKS

Chapter 23: The Lost Empire: Lingering Will pops in to say hi and also uhhhh whatever the fuck happens in Atlantis goes down idk

Chapter 24: Where the Dream Takes You: Sora may or may not have PTSD, boi should probs go see a therapist

Chapter 25: Drowning in Darkness: Aqua throws hands then proceeds to get Norted

Chapter 26: I See the Light: Basically KH3's take on Corona but things actually make sense this time

Chapter 27: What Once Was Mine: In which that bit from KH3 where Marluxia knocks Sora out actually leads to some legit payoff smh

Chapter 28: Firsthand Experience: Kairi and Lea take a trip to Disney World and yeet Vanitas (again) right the fuck outta there

Chapter 29: The World Es Mi Familia: Being an (unliving) skeleton also is bound to raise an existential crisis, right?

Chapter 30: Recuérdame: I cry while writing this chapter, both for my baby Xion and because Coco is just that damn tearjerking

Chapter 31: Destined Reunion: ALL THE POLY DESTINY TRIO FEELS

Chapter 32: Something There: At this point even Riku be lookin at Sora and Kairi and shouting "KISS ALREADY YOU ADORABLE DORKS"

Chapter 33: Tale as Old as Time: Sora commits an Actual Murder (am i kidding? Who knooooows)

Chapter 34: The Realm of Darkness: DARK AQUA CAN STEP ON MAH FACE IMO

Chapter 35: Rise to the Light: Great, now Aqua has PTSD too, thanks for nothin, Mickey

Chapter 36: Return to Depart: Sora has another Identity Crisis, part 2

Chapter 37: Broken Chains: Vanitas challenges Sora and Ven to a fight in the Denny's parking lot and fucking loses what else is new

Chapter 38: So This is Love: YES THEY FINALLY KISSED THOSE DORKS

Chapter 39: Almost There: Frogs and also like... Voodoo and so many BBS callbacks so damn many

Chapter 40: Dig a Little Deeper: Sora is too damn stubborn to admit he needs help what else is new

Chapter 41: Follow the Light: Wayfinder Family Reunion saves my life

Chapter 42: Solving Mysteries, Rewriting History: Sora and Goofy meet Donalds family (who then proceed to take the piss outta Donald cause this is Ducktales fam why wouldnt they)

Chapter 43: The Other Promise: Sora has yet another Identity Crisis, part 3

Chapter 44: Vector to the Heavens: Sora and Roxas drink their "Respect and Protect Xion" juice

Chapter 45: Another Arabian Night: Sora, Roxas, and Xion fuck around in a B-list Disney Direct to Video Sequel

Chapter 46: Out of Thin Air: GONNA THROW HANDS WITH XEHANORT HIMSELF THIS TIME AROUND GET AWAY FROM MY SON YA OLD FUCKHEAD

Chapter 47: Alone on the Run: Sora has a Bad Time, Riku and Kairi also have a Bad Time, generally everyone has a Bad Time

Chapter 48: Trust No One: Ven and Roxas add onto the never ending Twin Pile that apparently exists in Gravity Falls

Chapter 49: Not What He Seems: I KNOW ITS NOT UF BUT LOOKS LIKE I GOTTA THROW HANDS WITH BILL CIPHER ANYWAY SOMEHOW

Chapter 50: A Heart Torn Between: Vanitas learns that Girls exist while Sora continues to have a Very Bad Time

Chapter 51: Hawaiian Roller Coaster Ride: Riku's goin on a twink hunt, and dont think he dont know how to weeeeed em out

Chapter 52: Aloha 'Oe: Sora and Riku get into a bit of a lover's spat dont worry about it its nothin serious dont worry about it

Chapter 53: Treasured Memories: Namine is the Very First Person Ever to tell Vanitas he has emotional issues, its about damn time

Chapter 54: Let It Go: KAIRI'S FUCKIN PISSED SHE GONNA BRING HER DAMN DUMBASS WAYWARD BOYFRIEND HOME ALREADY DAMN also Sora hangs out with Elsa i guess

Chapter 55: Love Will Thaw: KAIRI KICKS EVERYONES ASSES INCLUDING SORA'S CAUSE LIKE I SAID SHES FUCKIN PISSED

Chapter 56: Back Into the Fold: Sora doesnt have an Identity Crisis anymore but he sure as hell has Anxiety now, part 4

Chapter 57: Farewell to the Wood: Absolute tone whiplash, brought to you by Winnie the Pooh and Sora's ongoing Existential Crisis too

Chapter 58: Link to All: Everyone just cries a lot for an entire chapter cause they all know they boutta fuckin dieeeee

Chapter 59: Face My Fears: I systematically rip every single one of our protagonists hearts out and stomp on each of them with no remorse whatsoever

Chapter 60: Fragments of Light: The B-Squad saves the day

Chapter 61: The Thirteenth Vessel: Sora hangs out with his New Fam, otherwise known as Organization XIII, family fun ensues and it totally isnt a massive angstfest i dont know what you mean

Chapter 62: Key to the Heart: Riku and Kairi throw hands with their boyfriend while also trying to save their boyfriend it makes sense if ya dont think about it

Chapter 63: The Final World: Sora is McFuckin dead and chilling in heaven with a cute baby plushie cat (hey its not a spoiler if KH3 did it first)

Chapter 64: At Daybreak: "But Jen, if you hate KHX so much then why do you keep making so many references to it???" BECAUSE THATS WHY NOW SHUT UP

Chapter 65: The Keyblade War: Keyblade Fight Club, either you Die or you DIE

Chapter 66: Clash of Light and Darkness: Bunch of teenagers throw hands with some bald old fuckhead, but in the end nobody wins except me

Chapter 67: Kingdom Hearts: You know you're in for something fucking nuts when the chapter title is named after the entire series

Chapter 68: The King and the Crown: Jen pulls off a plot twist so mind blowingly ridiculous that it would probably make Tetsuya Nomura blush

Chapter 69: Reconnect: Everyone has a happy ending except no not really i lied

Chapter 70: Don't Think Twice: Oops I Lied again :)

Epilogue: Dearly Beloved: Fuck KH3's ending this is my new canon now

#this is such a shitpost #though im not lying about any of this stuff tbh #there are indeed spoilers in here if ya squint #jen writes #keys to the kingdom

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natmagick · 3 years

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(TW I guess? I dont expect anyone to read this anyway so 🤷‍♀️ just in case anyone becomes concerned, I'm ok so dont lol.)

Ya know, I just need to get this off my chest and I'm doing it here bc no one irl knows me here, so rant time lol. I really hate my mind sometimes. Its hard for me to make decisions, and I have this mental complex where I feel like I have to 100% commit to something, speficially when it come to style or "atheistic", and if I don't I'm a "poser". No one has ever said this to me, so idk why my mind is telling me this. I get so frustrated with my self because I have days I want to be all edgy and whatever, but other days I want to be soft and cute. I want to cuddle (even tho I'm alone and quarantine isnt helping) and show off my plushies and wear pastels but then this voice in my head tells me I'm too big for that and that I spent so much time in middle and highschool purging pinks and pastels from my life that I'm just a big poser and lier if all of a sudden I change it up.

I also have other issues too. My mind isn't the same as I remember it being in grade school and after some research I legitimately believe I might have ADHD. If I do, and I don't wanna self diagnose here, it would explain alot of my behaviors and mental processes growing up, such as hyper-fixation on specific thing, talking too much, ect. (I'm also lowkey afraid of getting officially diagnosed, ik, it's stupid) But rn in my life, just a few months after a rather traumatic event happend, I can't focus for shit. Its effecting my school work (I'm in college) and I hate myself for it. I feel so... stupid. Like just focus, it's not that hard. And I do all the little things, I write things down and keep up pretty well with a planner, I try to set times and even play lofi study beats, lyrics distract me, and some times it works, other times it doesnt. I want to do it, I want to keep my grads up, I was always the "gifted" child, and I also have other things I want to do, but it's like I just physically cant.

(I also have gained some weight sence starting school which isnt helping my mental health rn but at the same time it's also not the most pressing matter to me rn, tho I do need to start eating better and taking better care of my body in general, tho at the same time the little voice in my head says "what's the point?". But like I said its not the most pressing matter rn.)

I want to do so many things, I want to paint and roller skate and write and read and actually do my school work so I can be the best in my career field and watch anime and listen to new music, sew, cook, bake, and all my other little hobbies(?), but I just feel like I physically cant. My room is a depression mess rn, and I feel like I'm stuck in my body. Like my mind is floating while body is weighed down. And its sucks because I feel so self aware but unable to do anything about it. Because at the same time I have another voice in my head that says I can dress the way I want, that I'm not "too big" nor am I stupid. That I still have my whole life ahead and I can do all the things I want to and I'll find love somewhere someday.

Parts of me are telling me to just hold on while other parts are asking what's the point, and I'm just so tired.

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dayoung-remade · 7 years

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hola! can you do the astrology x nct thing w me to? my placements are: capricorn sun, pisces moon, sagittarius mercury, aquarius venus, aquarius mars (and leo rising, if that's of importance) ~ ❤️

I ship u w yuta !! also i apologize 2 everyone who sent one in for my style while writing these being so inconsistent bye jfdk once i get used to these it’ll be more organised :p anyway its under the cut !!

yuta is a scorpio sun AND moon, so trust doesnt come easy with him. scorpios tend to trust caps the most out of any other sign, which automatically forms a deep bond. scorpios have a lot hidden inside, they’re so emo, they’ve learned to hide it. once they find someone they trust, they can finally open up about their feelings and thoughts. you have a pisces moon, which means you would be willing to hear him out.

your moon signs are made for each other tbh !! hes a scorpio moon. you have a great understanding of each others emotions, and u know how to cheer each other up when one of u is down. its the kind of bond where u could sense something is wrong without even being in the same room? one thing is yuta’s demonic scorpio ass loves to fight, but ur pisces moon doesnt want that. it could cause some issues, but they would always be solved bc as i said, u know how to cheer each other up !! i’ve seen lots of ppl describe the scorpio n pisces combo as psychic n its accurate !! if u were in a family gathering n yuta joined u, n u saw the aunt u hate going to talk to him, just make eye contact n he’d understand hes gotta Run. the downside to the pisces x scorpio combination is the way u deal w emotions. yuta still hates the kid who stole his lollipop inn the third grade and u forgave ur teacher that failed u an entire class for no reason, ya feel? so a little fight could cause big issues.

so ! ur mercury is in sagittarius .. u take no bullshit n say no bullshit. you’re blunt, but not w bad intention. yuta on the other hand, has his mercury in libra. but heres the thing !! mercury in libra sugarcoats everything they say, they know what ppl want and they give it to them. I HAVE NEVER HEARD YUTA SAY ANYTHING THAT ISNT HONEST ? ESPECIALLY TO THE OTHER MEMBERS LIKE HES CONTENT W HIS SCORPIO ASS HE LETS LOOSE !! BUT . he uses his manipulation skills on the fans bc he knows what we wanna hear bfjvdckx.. i think the reason hes so honest is his sag mars .. he doesnt give half a shit hfvj ok but anyway !! u guys wld b super fun. he’s a tease, one sec he’d b a bully n calling u a utahraptor lookin ass next sec he’d be a flirt fhdjsk

so, ur an aqua venus and hes a scorpio venus .. its hard. you need a lot of space in relationships, you dont wanna be dominated all the time n u dont need constant affection. that doesnt mean u dont care, u just need Space. yuta doesnt get that whole concept.. when a scorpio venus is in love, they’ll constantly be looking out for their s/o, they’ll be loving, caring and extremely passionate. yuta would think you’re too detached, and end up being insecure over how you aren’t returning th affection he gives u. u might find the attention he gives u overbearing. this could be fixed with discussion and understanding. u need to be more open to reciprocating the attention he gives u, and he needs to learn when to give u space. my ex was a scorpio venus n im a gem venus n it didnt end well, mainly bc i was too passive to tell him i needed space so !! thats rly important and could make or break the relationship

im not gna talk abt mars bc its only related to relationships in a sexual way n idk whos comfortable w that or not !!

ok i love this whole thing bc ! theres such a deep, strong, special bond going on and if the rest of the stuff i mentioned went well, it could literally be irreplaceable !! yuta wld be the type of bf to see a cute plushy n buy u it bc it reminded him of u, but also the type to buy an e.t plushy n say it reminded him of u vfnjcdm oh nd ur dates wld b walking around in a city window shopping n tasting different food or just hanging out in general.. imagine him taking u on a japan tour or smthn tht wld be so cute?? but ye his sag mars ass wld try to take u on a Japan Adventure but end up getting lost

#I DIDNT PROOF READ SORRY IF THERE ARE ERRORS #this one was tricky!! i have a hard time w scorpios in general #bc theyre so hard to understand .. my gemini ass cannot comprehend #astrology #asks

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tumblunni · 6 years

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Also HELL YES FOR CASUAL PLAYER LOVE

Im so happy to hear that Let's Go is indeed INTENTIONALLY designed to be "more casual" and everything these super anti-casual conpetitive players are complaining about was intentionalky put in there cos the developers legit think its better. THANK YOU!

i dunno man it just seems like we NEVER heae about the developers doing anything for the fans unless its enablibg competitive play or iv breeding or whatever. Like those are the only definitions of "fans" that interviewers seem to care about. And Its hard to know what the developers really think when the questions that are asked leave out a huge componant of the fanbase, yknow?

And uhh.. I mean its just good to specificially know that theyre okay with casual fans existing, like not just "its for kids" but "hey you are not bad if you are an adult who also enjoys the game for its intended appeal points and not for a huge mega complicated mathematical metagame people made up to be 'more mature'". I was really surprised to see that written interview with masuda specifically mentioning IV breeding as the place where conpetitive goes too far and makes the game not fun anymore. "Pokemon wasn't meant to be a game about hatching eggs and nothing else." Like.. Playing competitively itself is not bad, i dont wanna sound like i hate hardcore fans and im a big ol jerk. I admire the dedication because it all seems so super unattainable and mathematically magical to me! Im not into that stuff but i can admire that you have to be a damn genius to achieve all that stuff. BUT i also get what he's saying. Because it sucks when you HAVE to be a damn genius to EVEN START PLAYING! Whenever high level competitive strats become the goddamn baseline it makes competitive completely inaccessable to everyone except the most hardcore of the hardcore, and its like damn man how do you even become that if you have no way to start practising? Iv breeding is so INSANE in retrospect! Like when you think about it, its wild that people even cracked the code for how to game the system and get the highest possible randomized stats for every ridiculously minor thing. Like how the fuck did they even figure out any of this?? And then all the further madness into figuring out how to attain it and how to raise odds of shinys and hidden abilities and how they keep figuring out new ways to do it with every new system each game brings out. And then people will spend friggin LITERAL DAYS OF REAL TIME running up and down the same road in the game, hatching thousands of eggs just to get the one mathematically superior pokemon from a confluence of random events. And this is treated as fuckin REQUIRED to play the game! You can't touch competitive if you dont do it. And these bad sorts of competitive players will try and force this requirement onto other non-competitive parts of the game, and shame casual players for not doing it even though its literally not what they want to play the game for.

Seriously, man! Individual values were just designed to make individual pokemon more random, so the play experience would seem more unique to each run. It was literally invented for a "casual" reason! It just really sucks that they implimented it in a way that had an objective "best" value to get, so people ignored the whole point of "adding personality" and just wanted that one. Tho i mean at least they patched out the early issue where gender and shinyness were linked to these values so you couldnt get certain types of pokemon as the "best" version and it was even more limiting. Glad that GSC didnt have online metagame yet, lol! (Tho it makes it possible for people to more easily predict which pokenon will become Shiny when transferred from rby to gsc, which is neat.)

ANYWAY WHERE WAS I

Oh yeah! I appreciate that each generation of games lately has made it easier to see your IVs and EVs and to get them to their "best" versions, with even the FUCK YEAH feature pf being able to "fix" bad IVs on level 100 pokemon. I carried my Sneasel named Reaper since RSE and he's been completely unuseable for so long and bottlecaps fixed that! Kid me just played the game like he was my starter and i loved him. I didnt know about IVs or EVs, so i took this terribly-statted dude with a bad ability and made him fight all the wrong pokemon because he is my best friend and he needs to win every gym battle and i will buy him lemonades afterward. Also he wore the Blackglasses item forever cos i thougjt itd be cool if you could put accessories on your pokemon. So yeah i did Everything Wrong and thus all the pokemon i actually cared about were made weak and useless by my love and i had to spend 48 hours running down a stupid road to hatch and abandon 1400 new ones just to get one that was "useable". Thanks to bottlecaps, this is no more! Decade old weasel pals can be revived! Tho still it sucks that i hit level 100 before this mon's evolution came out. Alas!

BUT

Like.. Even tho now its slightly less hard to make a "perfect" pokemon its still tedious as hell and really takes you out of the moment and you have to already know beforehand that its necessary. Kids are just gonna blunder in and not even know why they keep losing due to no fault of their own. Adults are gonna also do that. Seriously this isnt a "kiddy fans vs mature fans" or "non fans versus FANS" thing, this is just "fans who have one very specific skill for memorizing a bunch of numbers and steps and enduring hours of boredom doing it vs..people who think that kinda ruins the game". And even if nintendo fully streamlined the process into sonething easy, itd still feel like an unnecessary roadblock in the way of just getting to play the damn game. We really need to add some sort of hardcore/casual or iv breeding/no iv breeding thing to league divisions, as well as the tier lists. This is why im so hyped for the current "Spooky Cup", since it actually seems like a "just for fun" multiplayer experience, and its kinda dumb that we have to rely on nintendo actually programming limitations into a tournement cos the players refuse to allow anyone to just do it normally. I did a big whoop at "no mega stones" and "everyone gets a participation prize even if they lose"! And the limitations being a random event based thing rather than a skill cap! Yay ghost types!! Reminds me of the baby pokemon only tourneys in the n64 games. That was a kind of hardcore challenge that had a bit of creativity to it!

So anyway anyway what i'm getting at...

I'm just happy that the devs are saying "yes this is a casual game with more of what casual players want, and less of those hardcore limitations" and THATS NOT MEANT TO BE A NEGATIVE!! Actual developers sitting on a couch hugging giant pikachu plushies and saying this game is for people who just want a fun game about..well, hugging pikachus! They changed the way you catch pokemon because they wanted it to be more fun. They brought back following pokemon because fun. You get all these new features for your starter because they wanted you to really feel like a kid going on their first pokemon adventure and sharing all these special moments with pikachu! They talked about how the art style was decided upon because it was the closest to "how you imagined it in your head when you played pokemon yellow", and "if it was photorealistic it just wouldnt feel right". They picked eevee for the second option because they actually paid attention to the fans and which pokemon was the second most popular and had a similar "both cute and cool" appeal with all audiences. And they put the most effort into the visuals and the cuteness and making everything just feel like a good and fun adventure that recaptures everything you wanted as a kid playing the first game.

And they just act so unapologetically HAPPY about all these parts of the game! These are their favourite parts! They're the goddamn DEVELOPERS and even they say that they prefer the story and the characters and the relaxing childlike whimsy to the concept of refining gameplay to a ridiculous hardcore perfection and throwing out everything else in pursuit of that. And man, seeing them hugging the big pika and eev plushies in EVERY PROMOTIONAL VIDEO and just enjoying playing their own game so much!! And babbling on about dressing up your pokemon!!

God its just SO GOOD to see this as a fan who's been here since the very beginnibg and is starting to feel quite self concious about being an adult fan who isnt doing it "properly". Like man the pressure of hardcore competotive being the "only right way" started even when i was just 11, like seriously THE AGE THE ACTUAL TRAINERS ARE IN THE GODDAMN GAME. Before you even hit your teens you already got stuck up older kids telling you you were too old to just enjoy a game cos you enjoyed the damn game, noooo you have to make it as unfun as possible and only derive enjoyment from defeating other people. It took me until ORAS to actually even be able to try competitive at all, i found it so overwhelming until they added other methods to EV train. And even then i still felt like the blandness of the preparation outweighed any fun of playing these "higher level" battles. Like sure maybe some people like that stuff but it felt so dissappointing after all these years of being pressured to try it...

Sometimes its just good to enjoy a game cos you legit like the world and characters. Sometimes its just really validating to see the developers talking about enjoying making those things, cos it gives you permission to be less embarrassed about it. Sometimes its good to also see them hugging a hundred dollar giant pikachu while you hug your hundred dollar giant mimikyu. Cos seriously what is the point of being an adult if youre not allowed to buy these adult sized plushies? What kid could ever afford those! Im not letting my childhood dream pass me by just because ~maturity~ when im finally able to slap a fat wad of cash on the table and yell GIVE ME THE BIGGEST CHU

I will embrace all my pure childhood love and enjoy this game of just huggins and nothing else! And i really like this concept for the series, if they continue doing Let's Go as a spinoff so we'd have a set of games appealing to each of the casual and hardcore demographics. I always feel bad complaining about hardcore when really my actual opinion on it is just "its not for me" and im actually only complaining about the rude fans who tell me im not a real fan unless i like their genre of stuff. Dude i was three years old when pokemon came out, i think ive earned my right by seniority to hug a plushie or two! So itd be awesome if hardcore doods could get their super hardcore game too, and we could just argue less cos we'd each be able to enjoy what we enjoy. Tho i mean the main series games already have a pretty clear divide between story/fun being the main game and hardcore competitive being a postgame thing. And yet we still get all this fandom fightibg over "ignore the actual 90% of the game, skip the plotline and only play competitive" apparantly being the "real" way to play it. Like man im worried that attitude is still gonna stick arpund even if they do give us separate games appealing to each side of the fandom?

EHHH WHATEVER! Im just gonna sit here in my corner of casual hugs and work on my self confidence to be able to stop feeling bad about not being someone else's idea of a "real" fan. If real fans can't have pikachu in a little hat, then that is not the life i wanna lead!

LITTLE GODDAMN HAT, MY GUY

#rambleramble #just a long vent ive had pent up since gen 4 lol #tho man people were still jerks in the competitive scene even back when it was just local link cables #just that there wasnt a massive internet community thats only really available to competitive people and excludes anyone else

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