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roadkiii · 1 year

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Entry 1.6.4-2 - The Oakenhall of Timberport

Welcome to my blog. I’m not tagging anything but entry #, so sorry if my unrelated mess somehow ends up in your search.

Just realized 1.6 came out in 2013 so we're now in a 10 year old edition, slowly catching up.

I'm wondering if maybe I should focus on more farming, just grind in my existing plains biomes especially since acacia/dark oak is being added in 1.7. Then I considered waiting until 1.7 to roam for horses, but if I run into a roofed forest then, I might lose access to a woodland mansion (not added until 1.11) so I truly can't wander much until biomes and caves are locked in.

This adds an interesting aspect to my gameplay, since usually in a Normal™ minecraft world I will typically wander too far from my base, die, have no idea where I was, and give up. Hence why my last major world project was hardcore. I hate being locked into hard mode but I acknowledge that I am not a good enough gamer to play on hard all day every day.

Tangent aside, I'm going to be stuck in 1.6 for a while I think. Which is disappointing, because I am Very excited for afk fish farming in 1.7 but can't upgrade.

If I'm going to be here for a while, I'm going to spend some time properly constructing buildings around the village. I've been doing little bits of terraforming and tearing down houses, I think my (kind of ugly) house) is one of the few buildings left standing. I'd like to relocate my house, maybe to the top of the mountain above Giratina, but I don't know.

I think this location would be good for a better hotel/inn setup than I currently have, I scaled down a "modern" build I saw on google for the previous villager housing and I don't think I'm a fan. Reconstruction time!

I do want to make sure I reuse these brick stairs for something in the new build though, bricks were (and kinda still are) a flex.

Also, because achievements reset again, I got "Getting Wood" for tearing down my own home. Incredible.

I think I could make a wheat farm underneath the housing, safely locked away from the villagers who will probably find a way to trample it.

[ONE WEEK OF GAMEPLAY LATER]

hey so uh. there were a few progress pics but tumblr ate my previous draft of this post. Say hello to Oakenhall. I played with fantasy name generator and kinda got stuck on a wood theme kick bc I want to use mostly wood for the village buildings and plant an illuminated (maybe more froglight mushroom themed later on) forest close to the walls.

It'll be expensive and time consuming, but I want to put logs columns where I would have placed corner stairs on the wall, if that makes sense.

like hiding where the wall corners meet.

Anyway, I wanted this blog to be a bit more journal-y so I'm going to start doing more weekly-ish posts where I play in small increments before work and *maybe* make more progress on days off, maybe. Then at the end of the week I'd just tour any unique changes rather than my current strategy of literally blogging while I play, which is kind of distracting.

Timberport Tuesdays. or smth.

ANYWAY. I want to make the most of this is a kind of taste of what the new entrys will be like.

This is the back of Oakenhall, I wanted to make some kind of back mural but with only a 3x5 area I just made it a little abstract rainbow.

This roof will take me forever I hate building roofs so much this is why I just squared off the old building

Also, can we talk about how time consuming wooden builds are?

Like between the walls and floor (don't get me started on accent logs) this takes so much wood. But also, I wanted to show somehow that this is plank floor so I used all the stairs I got from tearing down villager roofs as a kind of baseboard.

At the rate I'm going and how much wood I still need, I might have to take a break from building to enchant another axe (silk touch would be nice, even if its not on a pickaxe..)

I don't think I would ever make an automatic tree farm. If I'm going to build something from wood, I would much rather just cut down trees (getting saplings to hoard to turn into bone meal later) than have to create complex redstone contraptions to break the game and duplicate sand to mine the wood with TNT. Waaayyy too much work.

Between those two logs is the entrance, I have 8 doors and 8 beds on this floor. I still haven't crafted any paintings for the interior but I'm focusing on the 2nd floor walls rn so my wool is going to smth else

the 2nd story has 10 doors and 12 beds, I'm prepped for when they'll eventually need beds, and I may have some "accidental" villagers walking into lava so that I can get every profession here.

I do have quite the little collection of them now, I'm pretty sure they're ready to move into their new home. Could've swore I had a priest and a few more villagers but they could've wandered off or killed themselves climbing my incomplete demolitions. I did accidentally axe one.

Glad the golem is happy w/ the new place :)

I guess my next post will be next Tuesday if everything goes according to plan.

next (1.6.4-3)

#1.6.4 pt2

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tennessoui · 3 years

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Ummmmmm can i please request 5

This was written all on my phone waiting for my train and I’m trying to post it through my phone which tumblr is being a lil bitch about but here is

5. Falling Pregnant After A One Night Stand (3.6k)

(squick: a/b/o dynamics, mpreg)(two tags I never thought I’d write lmao)

Anakin’s working on the couch when he hears the key in the lock of the apartment door, signaling that finally—finally—Obi-Wan’s home from his week-long hastily planned stay at Bail’s place.

Bail and Breha’s place, Anakin reminds himself. Obi-Wan’s mated friends pose no competition to Anakin’s inner alpha, which definitely thinks of Obi-Wan as his omega.

Obi-Wan comes into the main room quietly, putting his bag on one of the barstools and leaning against the counter for a second, head bowed.

When he lets out a sigh and a heavy curse, Anakin can’t stop himself from speaking up, alarmed. “Are you alright? Did something happen?”

Obi-Wan jolts and turns around to face the couch, clearly startled. “Anakin!” he yelps, one hand flying to his stomach and the other to grip the counter behind him, as if Anakin is an intruder, and not the man he’s been living with for six years. “I thought you’d be at work!”

Anakin fights the urge to flush. The truth is, he’s tried to go into work for the past three days, but Obi-Wan’s absense has kicked his alpha hindbrain into a special kind of panic mode, where he can’t stand to leave the den until the omega returns to it safely.

It’s not like Anakin’s going to say that though, not after five years of pining for the older omega from afar. He’s a pro at this by now.

“Working from home today,” Anakin says. And then so Obi-Wan doesn’t think he’s spent his entire week alone on the couch waiting to be not alone anymore (he has), he lies, “Woke up hungover.”

“On a Thursday?” Obi-Wan says, sounding a bit concerned.

Anakin purses his lips and tries not to pout. He rakes his eyes over the omega, taking in his messed up hair and untrimmed beard and the dark circles that have popped up beneath his eyes. “You didn’t answer, Obi-Wan,” he accuses. “What’s wrong?”

The omega’s scent tinges with distress, which only proves Anakin’s point further. Obi-Wan never lets his scent leak through his blockers, not if he can help it. Anakin’s always made sure to luxuriate in his unbridled scent when he can, one that smells like maple and rain and cinnamon. But to smell it now just makes him feel more worried.

“Are you going into—“ Anakin stutters over the word heat. Obi-Wan’s at least feeling well enough to roll his eyes fondly. The older omega thinks Anakin’s one of those alphas that get wildly uncomfortable talking about an omega’s heat. It’s not true. Anakin’s helped friends through heats both platonically and sexually. Look, he’s run to the corner bodega at two in the morning to get Padmé heating pads to be left outside her door. He’s no stranger to heats.

But the idea of his prim and proper roommate writhing around in his nest, begging for something to fill him up the way he needs—that makes Anakin stutter and blush and trip over his words.

“No,” Obi-Wan says, but there’s something off in his tone, something sour in his scent. Anakin puts his laptop aside—the screen’s gone dark already anyway—and makes to stand, his inner alpha baying with the need to run his hands over the omega, to make sure he’s not bleeding or hurt or injured—

“I—I’m going to unpack and take a shower,” Obi-Wan decides, pushing away from the counter and closer to the couch. Not close enough. But closer. “And then I need to talk to you about something.”

“Are you…” Anakin casts around for the right word to say. Ill. Leaving me. Sick. Sick of me. Done with all of this. Dying.

Obi-Wan pauses and gives him his own sort of once-over. Whatever he finds in either his body language or his scent brings a soft smile to the omega’s face. “I’m fine, dear one. I—I need a shower. I don’t—smell right.”

Anakin blinks after him, hands balling into fists and relaxing as he processes those words. Usually it’s Anakin who wants Obi-Wan to shower off the stench of other alphas after his business trips or stays at his friends’ places. Obi-Wan’s always insisted he smells fine, but he’ll cave if Anakin’s mood gets bad enough.

It’s not something he’s especially proud of, but it’s worth it when Obi-Wan curls up onto the couch beside Anakin and he smells only like the shampoo and soap they share.

Sometimes if he’s tired enough, he’ll even let Anakin scent mark him so that next time he goes out, everyone will automatically assume he’s already in possession of an alpha and not looking for anything.

Sometimes, he even asks for it. Those times are the best.

Anakin tries to sit still while he waits for Obi-Wan to come back, but it’s impossible. He moves to the table, then to the kitchen counter, then back to the couch. Where should he sit, where would be a place he feels safe enough to receive whatever news Obi-Wan’s putting off telling him?

In the omega’s arms in his own bed, is the answer that comes to mind. But can he really ask that of Obi-Wan? They’ve done it before, when Anakin’s mother had died, when Ahsoka had left the city to get a degree abroad, when Anakin feels as though he’s going to shake apart if he doesn’t hold onto his omega and make sure that he at least can’t leave him too.

When Obi-Wan comes out of his room, all flushed from the shower with his hair still damp and messy, wearing a blue sweater Anakin’s pretty sure used to be his and a pair of sweatpants that are definitely currently his, there’s hardly a choice to make. If Obi-Wan wants to wear his scent, Anakin will give it to him.

Silently he takes his hand and leads him to his bedroom, toeing out of his shoes and tugging him into his bed and into his arms.

Obi-Wan goes so easily that it only makes Anakin more worried. His heart cannot take this level of stress and he has to hide his face in the crook of Obi-Wan’s neck and inhales greedily at the pure scent of omega—Obi-Wan omega—his omega.

“Obi-Wan,” he says nonsensically, just to feel the way the omega in his arms shudders at the sensation of his lips brushing against the sensitive skin of his neck.

But then Obi-Wan doesn’t stop shaking and Anakin can feel a growing wetness against his shirt. He can’t stop the distressed rumble that comes out of his throat, but he bites his tongue just in time to stop the alpha command to tell him. Obi-Wan wouldn’t like that and Anakin wouldn’t like doing it.

His hands stroke soothingly over the omega’s back as he starts purring from within his chest. An alpha’s purr is supposed to reassure an omega, make them feel safe and protected, but Obi-Wan doesn’t seem to realize this because he doesn’t stop crying.

“Talk to me,” Anakin murmurs nosing at the short hairs behind Obi-Wan’s ears. “Baby. Obi. Omega. What is wrong? What can I do?”

Obi-Wan wipes his eyes dry on Anakin’s shirt and looks up at him with a heartbroken but strangely resigned expression. Like he already knows what Anakin’s going to do, and he thinks nothing he says will change anything.

As if.

When Obi-Wan went on a two month long business trip three years ago, Anakin grew out a beard and it only took one look from the omega upon his return before Anakin was shaving it off. The point is, Obi-Wan doesn’t even need to speak half the time for Anakin to agree. He’s just that in love. It’s pathetic. He can’t remember who he was before it.

“I’m a mess, I’m sorry,” Obi-Wan finally gets out, retracting one of his hands from the tight grip he has on Anakin’s shirt to rub at his eye. “I told myself I wasn’t going to be like this, but. I don’t—it’s—“

“Hey, hey,” Anakin soothes, leaning back a bit so he can knock their foreheads together. Packmates do that all the time. “It’s okay.”

Obi-Wan nods slowly, and his scent expands with the pleasant notes of a comforted, protected omega.

“Do you remember…when I went to Seattle at the end of August for that conference?” he starts slowly.

Anakin hums in acknowledgement. He’d wanted to go with Obi-Wan, instincts demanding that the other side of the country was too far for the omega to travel alone, but he’d not been able to get time off of work.

His heart drops into his stomach at the idea that somehow maybe Obi-Wan met someone there during his four-day trip, and he’s in love with them and is trying to find a way to tell Anakin he’s moving.

Would it be pathetic if Anakin followed him? Would Obi-Wan’s new alpha allow Anakin to live with Obi-Wan still? Would Obi-Wan’s alpha be amenable to telling Anakin how he made Obi-Wan fall in love with him in a matter of days when Anakin’s been trying to get the man to love him romantically for six years?

Anakin’s heart rate is up, but it’s nothing compared to the staccato beat of Obi-Wan’s. He tries to send out more calming pheromones, but he can’t even find them for himself.

This is it. He’s about to lose Obi-Wan. The alpha inside of him whimpers, and it takes all of his willpower not to crush his omega tighter to his chest.

No. Not his.

“I met a man there, just at the hotel,” Obi-Wan says. It would have been kinder if he’d just stabbed Anakin with the kitchen knife. There’s no relief to be found in this slow death. Because—because surely, Anakin will die without Obi-Wan. Not physically, of course. He’s not one of those alphas who doesn’t know how to take care of himself.

Actually, it’s Anakin that cooks most of the time for both of them. And Anakin will do the shopping, will keep an eye on the amount of cleaning supplies they have, how much toilet paper, how many garbage bags.

But what would be the point of cooking anything if Obi-Wan isn’t there to taste it and shower him with praise? What’s the point of cleaning the apartment if Obi-Wan isn’t there to tuck himself into his arms on the couch and thank him for the work? What’s the point of anything if he’s doing it without Obi-Wan?

“Anakin, I—“ Obi-Wan stutters and falls silent. Anakin braces himself for the end he should have seen coming. “I’m pregnant.”

White noise. Anakin doesn't even think he’s breathing. Obi-Wan is pregnant. Obi-Wan…had a one-night stand in a city 2,400 miles away from Anakin, and he’s pregnant. Someone touched Obi-Wan, someone made Obi-Wan come, someone got Obi-Wan pregnant, and maybe…maybe there’s a chance they’ll get to keep Obi-Wan too.

The alpha in his chest howls at the thought. The idea that—that someone else will have a better claim on Obi-Wan’s heart. What’s six years of living together compared to a child?

Except Obi-Wan presses further into his chest, with a shaky whine. The omega is here now, not with any other alpha, not in any other city. He’s in Anakin’s bed, in Anakin’s arms.

Anakin opens and closes his mouth, trying to figure out what to say, how to say it, how to speak. He needs to know so much more. He needs to know what Obi-Wan is going to do, if he’s in contact with the father, if he’s planning to move, if he’s planning to raise the—

As if he can hear his thoughts, Obi-Wan starts talking again, very fast as if he’s afraid Anakin’s going to kick him out in a few minutes and he needs to get the whole story out before he does.

“I’m keeping it. Them. I—I’m so old now—“ he’s barely 38– “I’m afraid this could be my only chance at…at a family.”

Anakin closes his eyes and hides his face in the still-damp strands of Obi-Wan’s hair. He doesn’t want Obi-Wan to see how devastated he is at this response. Anakin’s family is Obi-Wan. He’d thought…he’d wanted….

“I understand if you want to move out before the lease ends,” Obi-Wan mumbles, but his hands clench tightly around Anakin’s back. “I know…a baby…another alpha’s baby…you shouldn’t have to take care of them. I know it’s not what you signed up for, I wouldn’t…I wouldn’t hold it against you.” His voice gets smaller and smaller until Anakin has to strain to hear him. “I can do this alone.”

He sounds as if he’s telling himself as much as he’s telling Anakin. But Anakin can’t even focus on that because his entire attention is caught by everything else Obi-Wan’s just said. Because it sounds…it sounds as if Obi-Wan is planning to stay in the city. In the apartment. Without the sire.

Alone.

As if Anakin would ever let Obi-Wan be alone, given the choice. As if Anakin would ever leave Obi-Wan to struggle through any difficulty without him.

Obi-Wan presses impossibly closer to him. “Say something,” he demands, running his nose up and down Anakin’s neck, over his scent glands, as if he expects Anakin to be able to form whole, coherent sentences when he’s doing that with his mouth.

The pregnancy must be messing with Obi-Wan’s instincts and emotions, Anakin realizes distantly. His body must know he’s not mated, that he’s about to be a visibly pregnant, unmated Omega in a dangerous city. No wonder he’s trying to cover himself so completely in Anakin’s scent. He has to wonder if Obi-Wan even understands what he’s doing. He’s never been one to try and he in touch with his Omegan side.

“Alpha,” Obi-Wan pleads, and Anakin has a second realization that it’s been ages since he’s said something. The room fills with the scent of distressed, in pain omega.

Anakin lets out an involuntary purr and tightens his hold on Obi-Wan’s body. It would be nice to look him in the eyes, but he thinks they both need as little distance between themselves as possible. “You’re going to make a great parent,” he soothes, nuzzling along Obi-Wan’s hairline. “And I’m not going to leave you unless you want me to.”

Obi-Wan stills completely as if shocked to his bones, and then he relaxes bonelessly into Anakin’s arms. This time, Anakin feels the tears as soon as they start and he goes about stroking up and down Obi-Wan’s spine again.

“I was so afraid,” Obi-Wan admits between sobs. Anakin thinks to himself privately that he definitely knows how that feels, but one of them shouldn’t be crying. “I didn’t know how to tell you—I didn’t want you to hate me for making such a stupid mistake—“

There’s nothing Obi-Wan could do to make him hate him. Sure, Anakin’s absolutely filled with hatred for whoever caught Obi-Wan’s eye on that business trip, but none of those emotions bleed over into what he feels for Obi-Wan. Not when his love is too strong and entrenched.

“Bail said you’d understand but I’m just—a mess, I don’t know what I’m doing half the time and these goddamn hormones are making me feel out of control—“ Obi-Wan continues. The fact that Bail fucking Organa found out about Obi-Wan’s pregnancy before Anakin did will drive him crazy if he lets it, so he puts that aside for now and focuses on comforting his omega.

“We’ll figure it out,” Anakin says, scenting Obi-Wan back. “It’ll be alright.”

————

A few hours later, Obi-Wan awakens from the nap he’s fallen into with a start. Anakin’s gotten no sleep, too busy drawing nonsense lines on Obi-Wan’s back and staring at the ceiling, thinking about the future. About what’s going to happen to them, around them.

No matter how much he hates the sire of the child in Obi-Wan, he already feels attached to the baby. It’s part of Obi-Wan. Maybe they’ll have his hair color or his eyes. Maybe they’ll have his compassion, his wit. Maybe they’ll let Anakin teach them how to play soccer or swim or cook.

The possibilities are endless and all of them involve Obi-Wan falling in love with him because of how amazing of a father he is to his child.

It’s not the most pressing thought in his mind, but he has to admit at least to himself that it’s there. That he’s just as in love with Obi-Wan as he was when he woke up in the morning. Now he just has another part of Obi-Wan to love: his child.

Maybe their child.

“I need to tell him,” Obi-Wan mumbles from his spot laying across Anakin’s chest. “I don’t—I don’t particularly want his involvement or, or money, but he should know. He should have the option to be in his child’s life.”

The part of Anakin who has just spent the past three hours getting used to the idea of raising Obi-Wan’s child as if he’s his own bristles at the idea of the sire being involved at all.

“Do you have his number?” Anakin asks reluctantly. He can’t imagine getting to sleep with someone as gorgeous as Obi-Wan and not trying to give him a means of keeping in contact.

But Obi-Wan shakes his head.

“His address?”

Another negative. “I…know his name and where he works.”

Anakin bares his teeth at the ceiling. “And?”

Obi-wan sounds more than a bit embarrassed. “Ah. He was the bartender at the hotel. And his name tag said Set.”

“You went to a medical conference full of alpha surgeons and researchers and you…slept with the bartender,” Anakin says blankly, before he can stop himself.

Obi-Wan huffs. It’s the most Obi-Wan response he’s given since he got home from Bail’s. “Sorry my one-night stands don’t meet your standards.”

Anakin hums. The truth is the only person who will ever meet his standards as a romantic partner for Obi-Wan is Anakin. “So what do you want to do? Call the hotel and ask for Set?”

Which, by the way, is the most pretentiously Seattle name he’s ever heard of. Set’s given name is probably, like, David and he just wanted to sound cool and grunge.

“I can’t just—this isn’t something I can say over the phone, Anakin,” Obi-Wan says. He falls silent.

“It’s mid-November,” Anakin points out. “Neither of us are hurting for money, but plane tickets are going to be astronomical until January at least. If they’re available at all.”

There’d be shitty seats available, of course, but Anakin’s not going to let his pregnant omega cram himself into an uncomfortable, smelly seat for eight hours.

“You don’t—I don’t expect you to come with me,” Obi-Wan mumbles into Anakin’s collarbone.

Anakin just manages to bite back a scoff and the urge to point out that last time Obi-Wan went off to Seattle without him, he got pregnant. Who knows what would happen if he does it again?

“Well, I’m gonna,” he says firmly. “But I think we should drive. It’ll take longer, but I’d feel much better about what you’re exposed to, not to mention how much more comfortable my car is than a coach seat. We can share a motel bed to cut costs, and—what? Why are you looking at me like that?”

Obi-Wan picks himself up off his chest to stare at him quizzically. “What if your job won’t let you take the days off? They didn’t even let you leave for the original Seattle trip and that was only a few days. We’re talking weeks here, Ani.”

Anakin sets his face into a scowl. He’s worked at the same finance firm since moving to New York, but if they won’t let him take time off for this, for Obi-Wan, he’ll quit. Simple as that. “Then I’ll go anyway and they can fire me.”

Predictably, Obi-Wan has several protests. Anakin will hear none of them. If he is fired, if he can’t find another finance job in the city that makes the same amount of money, then they’ll move out to somewhere else. He’s heard good things about Denver. And if Obi-Wan doesn’t want to move that far, maybe they can move upstate. It’ll be easier to raise a kid outside of the city anyway.

He’s not dumb enough to tell Obi-Wan this, knowing it makes him sound literally insane, but he is just stupid enough to cut Obi-Wan off and say, “you’re the most important person in my life, Obi-Wan. You….you both are.”

Hesitantly he moves his hand down to rest it gently over the slightest swell of Obi-Wan’s tummy. The omega’s breath catches in his throat, but he lets him touch.

“I’m going to be there with you, every step of the way if you’ll have me,” Anakin adds, stroking his thumb over the impossibly soft skin. Pregnant. Obi-Wan is pregnant.

It’ll take a few days more to get completely used to that idea, that’s for sure.

Obi-Wan studies his face with eyes still red-rimmed and puffy from all that crying a few hours ago. Slowly he raises his own hand to Anakin’s neck and rubs up and down his scent gland with something almost like longing in his expression. They’re so close together. Anakin would let him have anything—everything.

Everything.

“Alright,” Obi-Wan agrees with an air of strained incredulity in his voice , placing his other hand over Anakin’s on top of his abdomen. “Yes. Let’s drive to Seattle so I can tell my one-night stand that I’m carrying his child.”

Anakin nods and adds privately in his head, And so I can tell him that that kid’s gonna be mine in everything but blood and he better stay on his side of the goddamn country.

He’s not losing his family to some stupid Seattle alpha.

#asks #prompt fill #I could definitely see 2 more parts of this #part 2 the road trip #part 3 the get together where anakin meets set and is very surprised when they look identical #this was so fun and cute to write that’s why it’s 3.6k btw #squick tag: a/b/o #squick tag: mpreg #stuck between calling this the roadtrip au or the baby daddy au #baby daddy vs found father showdown fight to death au #anakin would 😌❤️#anyway this was supposed to have a lot more italics but they didn’t copy from the Google doc so when I finally get home I’ll add them #obikin #omega obi-wan kenobi #alpha anakin skywalker #roadtrip au

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floraone · 4 years

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So, September is coming up, and with it smutember, and we’re doing it again! (At least I hope you’re with me, lol).

Just like last year, it runs alongside to the official daily word prompts on the official smutember blog: Smutember is an event that runs all throughout September for all fandoms. The following is meant as an addition, not a replacement. If you want to do daily prompts, please use the official words prompts (linked above). However, since daily prompts can be a bit intimidating (especially for a fandom corner that’s 25+ years old like ours and people in it have busy lives), as the resident smut advocate in our fandom, I again customized an alternative that can still incorporate the official themes.

Just like last year, down below you have a list of TROPE AND THEME PROMPTS. They’re a remix of sorts of last year’s tropes, with some you’ve seen before and some new ones, meant to spark a variety of ideas. The idea is that with these you can post once (or twice) per week instead of daily.

Be it for fanart or fanfic or any other sort of fanwork, tropes can be combined, (and they can be combined with the daily themes too), whatever floats your boat. Also, specifically: This event isn’t Usamamo-centric only. I will reblog any Sailor Moon content of any pairing as long as it follows the rules! (See below)

The aim of this event is to create sex-positive content together that celebrates a healthy depiction of consentual sexuality. Erotic fanfiction is a beautiful art, especially in a fandom of ours so largely cultivated by women and for women, as well as a strong inclusive focus on queer and gender-queer content and their creators!

What’s new: I’m taking a page out of the mini-bang’s impressive book, and when smutember is over, I will compile all entries that followed the rules into an online-only e-zine! This also means that art that may be too explicit for tumblr can still be included in the e-zine!

Here are the weekly trope challenges:

Reinvent a trope!

WEEK 1 (September 1st - 7th): Pick 1 or 2

🍋 Reunion Sex 🍋 Sex Fails 🍋 Second Chance Sex 🍋 You Talk In Your Sleep 🍋 Unresolved Sexual Tension 🍋 New Old Flame 🍋 Go Seduce My Archnemesis 🍋 Bedsharing 🍋 Sex with the Ex/Break-Up Sex 🍋 In Public

WEEK 2 (September 8th - 14th): Pick 1 or 2

🍋 Make-Up Sex 🍋 Battle Couple 🍋 Mission Sex 🍋 Work-Out Sex 🍋 Accidental Pervert 🍋 Bathing/Shower 🍋 Pool/Onsen 🍋 Sexual Fantasies 🍋 Blind Date 🍋 Aroused By Your____ (pick a feature)

WEEK 3 (September 15th - 21st): Pick 1 or 2

🍋 Established Relationship 🍋 “Thank God We’re Alive” 🍋 Caught In The Act 🍋 First Times 🍋 Introduction By Hook-Up 🍋 Pining 🍋 Locked In Together In A Small Space/ Trapped Together 🍋 Huddling For Warmth 🍋 Socially Distanced Sex 🍋 Stupid Sexy Friend 🍋 Caught In The Rain 🍋 Living Food Platter/Eating Off You 🍋 Shunga

WEEK 4 (September 22nd - 30th): Pick 1 or 2

🍋 Mutual Masturbation 🍋 Awkward/Clumsy Sex 🍋 Oh Crap There’s Fanfic Of Us 🍋 Talking In Bed 🍋 Fidelity Test 🍋 Fake-NOT-Dating 🍋 Mindlink 🍋 Sex Games 🍋 Tinder 🍋 Blackout/Quarantine/Disaster Warning/Weathering The Storm

RULES

1. Rating: These fics don’t necessarily need to be M or, in the case of Ao3, E- rated. Obviously, they are very, very welcome to be explicit for this event, but you can also go T-rated and stay in lime or ‘blacked out’-territory if you’re uncomfortable with writing explicit scenes! Both is perfectly and absolutely welcome! This of course also goes for fanart - your fanart may depict sexy scenes, but does NOT have to be explicit! (It can, though! Be aware that for tumblr’s guidelines, when sharing your art first, you may have to clip your images as a sort of preview. The original can then be sent to me privately to include into the e-zine!) 2. Minimum Age of Characters: Since this is a community event, if you do go explicit M rated material: age them up where necessary! So that everyone can be comfortable writing and reading these, let them be 18 at the minimum if they’re going to openly and explicitly wohoo. (16-17 is the global average age of consent worldwide, and also the average age for first sex among girls in many western countries. However, since most fanfic readers are located in the US, where the age of consent is 18, we’re going with 18 so that everyone can be comfortable reading!) If you go for canon fics at a time they are below this age, where you do not want to age up (say you’re going for an episode fix!) please stay in T territory for this event. 3. Off limits: Depictions of sexual acts that contain harmful, violent and non-consenting behaviour with non-consenting individuals (or those that aren’t able to consent, for instance because of their age, or state of mind among else!). If it doesn’t fly by law or the ICD in real life, please refrain from depicting it in the context of this event. This means that dubcon and noncon will not be reblogged for the event, so that people can be safely consuming the content without being triggered. All content will be screened in this regard, and I may contact you regarding trigger warnings. This is not at all to censor content, or that this content is in any form less valid (as long as it is properly tagged and not including characters that aren’t of age), but simply to ensure a safe environment for everyone reading. 4. Tag your triggers. Except the aforementioned limitation of harmful content, nothing is off limits. Explore your kinks! But if you write something that might be offensive to your readers, please tag it. This is ALSO a good way for your readers to find exactly what they ARE looking for! On Ao3 this can be done directly on the fic tags, for FF fics and fic links you can do it here on Tumblr via the fic post tags or in ANs. This is in consideration of your readers. 5. You can obviously post art for this event too. All previous rules apply here, as well. Unfortunately, Tumblr is now against tasteful nudity. That doesn’t mean you can’t link to a deviant art or similar account though, should you want to. And, since this year will include an e-zine at the end of it, all art will still be included fully in it. Here too, please tag your triggers. If you still want to post art on Tumblr, choose a T rated image - clip them where needed, or keep them (semi-)clothed, show us a heated kiss, etc! (Obviously we would love ALL the art and the nude body is a beautiful, wonderful thing, but obviously Tumblr doesn’t agree with us anymore!) 6. Have fun! Celebrate sexuality in an open, sex-positive way with us, try to be unapologetic about your likes while you write this, and appreciate the beauty that comes in the form of content with a largely female-gazing creator-base and audience! Smut in fanfiction has been beautifully put as the subjectification of sexuality (as opposed to objectification). So let’s celebrate this art form together! 7. Reviews: No one is forced to review. It can be uncomfortable to review a fic that contains sexual acts for any number of always valid reasons. Keep in mind, however, that much like a Burlesque dancer on stage, putting out sexual content can also be very intimidating to an author, and nothing is more discouraging than silence when baring yourself to an audience like this. That being said: Both Ao3 and FF have the option to review in anon mode. That means you have the option to remain anonymous while cheering the author on all the same. Just like the Burlesque dancer, your resident smut authors prefer to go on stage to loud cheering - it makes it all less awkward for them, and feels a little more like a big celebration!

If you’re unsure what sex positivity entails and want to read up, I wrote a post about it here.

This event is not supposed to cause harm. This means that I will screen all content before I reblog it here, and include it in the e-zine. So that everyone of age can feel safe reading the fanworks in the event, dubcon and noncon will not be reblogged and included in the e-zine, and accurate tagging and content warning will be watched. This does NOT MEAN that you cannot post this material: your own desire to write it and someone else’s desire to explicitly read this material are valid. I do not entitle myself to censor. It just means it will not be reblogged and shared through the event so that everyone may feel safe to read to the best of my ability. (But, of course, remember that I, too, might be biased, and not discover subtle forms of it, either. We’re all, in the end, a product of our upbringing and society, and I cannot be completely unbiased.)

During the event, I will be posting all Sailor Moon Smutember contributions in this format on my blog if you @ me to the post.

The official hashtag for the event is #smutember2020 hosted by the official smutember blog. Using it helps people find the content who search for it as well as those who wish to block it!

#smutember2020 #smutember sailor moon fandom #smutember usamamo fandom corner #smutember2020 rules #Spread the word!

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bog-frog · 3 years

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Half the reason I want tumblr to allow nsfw posts again at this point is so I can turn on safe mode and not be bombarded with nudes whenever I venture outside my dash

It used to be just the bots, but now no one tags their stuff properly because that makes their content much harder to find

I just want to use tumblr without having to lock the doors as if I'm looking at porn on purpose

#n/sfw text

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themcuhasruinedme · 5 years

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Vintage Film Fest (Pt. 3)

[Summary]: You and Steve have been dating for a while and you surprise him with a pair of tickets to a vintage film festival as an anniversary date

[Pairing]: Steve x reader

[Word Count]: 2,806

Tagging: @theashhole @dividedwecantfall @peterman-parker @avengerofyourheart @nataliarxmanxva @metalarmproblems @mcuimxgine @accio-rogers @imagine-assembling-the-avengers @that-sokovian-bastard @hellomissmabel @abovethesmokestacks @peculiar-persephone @bellameys @beccaanne814 @hymnofthevalkyrie @buckys-shield @callamint @redgillan @lancefvcker @thetalesofmooseandsquirrel @iwillbeinmynest @theassetseyeliner @lilasiannerd @aubzylynn @sgtbxckybxrnes @iamwarrenspeace @marvelrevival @httpmcrvel @avengersnthings @feelmyroarrrr @girl-next-door-writes @honey-bee-holly @patzammit

A/N: Harold Lloyd gif was made by yours truly! So, since Tumblr links no longer work you can find the other parts of this short series in my masterlist. And again, I encourage you guys to watch the movies and shorts I mention in this as they are all wonderful and amazing (heads up though: some of them are silent!) and all can be found on YouTube.

Day three seemed to go by kinda slow and you kept watching the clock throughout the day, waiting for the time to hit when Steve and you were to drive over to the theater.

You had went out shopping a little earlier that day, going to your favorite vintage clothing shop - a place that had everything from 1920′s to 1950′s inspired clothes and dresses and found a really cute day dress that looked like it could be from the 1930′s.

Steve liked when you wore clothes like that. He would say that they look much better on you than any “modern day” style. But then again, he said anything looked good on you. You also believed that he liked it mostly because it brought him back to that period in time. And you were happy to have anything spark those memories, cuz it meant that you were in for a walk down memory lane with him and it was the best feeling both of you could have.

When it was finally time to go to the theater, Steve couldn’t believe his eyes.

“Wow, [Y/N]. You look gorgeous,” he said as he took you by the hand and turned you around to look over the dress.

“Thank you. I found it at that vintage clothes shop, the one I told you about.”

“Oh, you mean the one that you always go to?” he asked as he locked the front door behind you and escorted you to the car.

You nodded. “That’s the one. I’ll have to take you there some time. They have clothes for men there as well.”

Opening the door and gently letting you sit down in the passenger seat, Steve placed a kiss on the top of your hand. “We’ll make that our next date,” he said giving you a wink.

When you got to the theater, Steve helped you out of the car and held your hand as the two of you walked in and stood in line to get the popcorn and drinks. And when you got all your snacks for the movies, the two of you walked in to a quarter-filled theater.

“Not as bad as last night, huh?”

“Hush up,” he said and playfully nudged your arm.

Finding seats around the same area as the two previous nights, you both settled down and waited for he movie night to begin. As the night before, there was plenty of time to wait before the movies and shorts actually started which again made you need to pull out your phone and play some games on. This time you brought your earbuds with to also watch some videos on YouTube, mostly other shorts of Charlie, Buster and Harold that weren’t being played on the big screen.

When you felt Steve tap your arm then point to his ear, you removed your earbuds to hear that there was going to be a five minute delay which then you heard moans and groans from all parts of the theater, mostly from the kids. But that five minutes went by quickly.

When the lights went dark and the first film started up, you had a smile appear on your face as it was one of Laurel and Hardy’s famous silent shorts called Liberty.

The theater made have started out quiet but laughter rang out seeing Stan and Ollie in prisoner outfits being chased by a cop, getting in a get-away car and trying to change into normal clothes. Even more laughter happened when a cop started chasing the car which sent Stan and Ollie into panic mode and made them quickly get out of the car, only to find out they had each other’s pants on.

The laughter was practically non stop through out the rest of the short as Stan and Ollie keep trying to find places to change pants but had no luck and had even worse luck while they were behind a seafood restaurant with Stan having a crab fall into his pants and begin to have problems with the crab nipping his butt.

A lot of gasps and ooo’s came from the kids all over the theater as they watched Stan and Ollie somehow get stuck at the top of an unfinished building and almost fall off of it several times, due to the crab still being stuck in the pants which were now properly on Ollie.

And squeaks of joy scattered throughout the place when Stan and Ollie were finally able to safely get back down on the ground.

When the lights came on for the first break to start, Steve looked over at you and smiled. You smiled back and placed your head on his shoulder, the two of you waiting quietly for the next one to start. And quickly start it did.

Your smile got even bigger seeing that it was one of your favorite Buster talking shorts called The Timid Young Man. You remembered that when you had started really getting into watching everything Buster had did, you were very hesitant with watching his talking stuff because you weren’t entirely sure if you were going to like the way he sounded. But when you heard his beautiful low, Midwestern, gruff, flat baritone voice, all your worries went out the door because hearing it made you melt into a puddle.

The audience sat in silence and watched as a girl ran out of her wedding ceremony, saying how she didn’t want to marry the man then watched the scene change as another girl gets a key to Milton’s, Buster’s character, room and wakes him up to tell him that their wedding was that day.

“Last night you said you couldn’t live without me,” the woman told him.

“Oh, I must’ve been drunk,” he replied, which made the audience burst out laughing.

The audience then watched as his butler told him to leave and go up to the mountains so he wouldn’t have to marry her. It then turned into him picking up the runaway bride on his drive out, getting into a heated standoff with another driver and finally getting to camp where the woman set everything up while Milton went fishing, which in turn had the whole theater laughing over.

Plenty of laughter came and went throughout the short, especially when the driver they had met earlier wandered on to their camp and Milton tried to get rid of him by doing several different things including pouring gasoline into the man’s salad. And when the short ended and the lights came on, you could see smiles on so many faces in the theater.

Another break happened and as you and Steve sat quietly waiting for the next one to start, you felt a tap on your shoulder. Looking behind you, you saw the couple you and Steve talked to the night before. Your excitement caught Steve’s attention and he turned around also getting excited to see them. The four of you talked for a bit during the break and got quiet when the lights dimmed down.

The title card of one of Charlie’s famous silent short’s called A Dog’s Life flashed across the screen and you were in a moment of quietude. It may not have been one of his laughter filled comedies but it did have some laughs here and there.

As soon as the dog appeared on the screen, you heard so many awww’s from every corner of the theater and most of it was from the kids. But you couldn’t help but smile too as the screen stayed on the for for a bit.

But laughter started when The Tramp got busted by a cop for trying to steal a hot dog and when the cop tried to get him, The Tramp evaded him by rolling out from under the fence, untying the cop’s shoes and kicking him when the cop got stuck under the fence.

It became quiet while the audience watched The Tramp wander around looking for a job and then finding that there was one but several others wanted it as well, the laughter broke out again seeing the poor Tramp get out smarted by the others.

But when the scene came of The Tramp saving the little dog from a bunch of other dogs, all the kids in the audience whooped and cheered which then turned to more aww’s when The Tramp took care of the little dog by giving it some milk that was left over in a bottle on someone’s doorstep to drink.

Laughs came when The Tramp came across a street food vendor who had a plate of sliced bread on the counter and he started stuffing them in his mouth, only stopping when the owner turned around to suspect The Tramp of something. And laughs came again when The Tramp snuck the dog into a pub by hiding it in his oversized pants.

You nestled your head on Steve’s chest as you watched The Tramp meet a girl in the pub, quickly fall for her but then get tossed out because he had no money to pay for his tab. Steve looked down at you and placed a soft kiss on the top of your head which made you smile and sigh contently.

Watching The Tramp go back to his outdoor sleeping spot with the dog, who he named Scraps, was the most adorable thing you could ever see.

But soon the movie was over with laughs happening throughout the rest of the short and it was time for a longer break.

You and Steve took turns to go to the restroom and Steve got a couple boxes of candy from the concession stand as well. Coming back, he handed you a box of Reese’s Pieces, your absolute favorite. Eyeing it like a vulture, you snatched it out of his hand and as you started to open it, all he could do was laugh.

“What’s so funny?” you asked, shoveling a handful in your mouth.

“You,” he said. “It’s almost like you’ve never had candy in your life before.” “Well, excuse me if you bring over my favorite kind. I can’t help how my mind tells my body to react upon seeing my favorite candy.”

Steve just chuckled and shook his head. Another several minutes and the lights dimmed down once again for the next movie to start.

A talking Harold Lloyd movie called Feet First started and this was another one of your favorites from Harold. After all, how could you not love how hard he tries to be the best shoe salesman possible along with his sweet and boyish voice.

The audience watched as he helped a girl who got in a bad scrap with a man after her car hit his from behind then seeing Harold and the girl both instantly fall for each other.

Steve joked that that’s not how things worked in real life which made you jab your finger in his side.

“Ow,” he whispered while flinching a bit.

“Oh, don’t be such a baby,” you whispered back and linked your arms around Steve’s arm, adjusting the way you were sitting in your seat.

Laughter came and went as the audience watched Harold meet the girl again and believe her to be the boss’s daughter, which made him want to impress her even more. And then watching as he accidentally gets stuck on a ship eventually meeting the girl again along with his boss and his wife.

Gasps from the kids throughout the theater happened when Harold escaped from the ships crew by hiding in a mailbag which then got picked up and brought ashore to New York but fell off a delivery cart onto a window cleaner's cradle, which was then hoisted upwards.

More gasps and ooo’s followed as the audience watched the bag get caught on the side of the building as Harold struggled to get out of it. But laughter soon followed as everyone watched him get out of the bag after landing on the cradle and going into panic mode, clinging tightly to it and yelling for help while the two window washers at the top of the building hoisting it up were totally oblivious to then fact that Harold was on it.

Soon it was a mix of gasps and laughter as you all watched Harold try to get into the building while also trying to not fall off, along with the cradle going up and down only causing problems for him.

When the happy ending came and the movie finished, the lights came on and the last break of the night started. You decided to pull out your phone and scroll through your social media for a bit while Steve did the same, which made the two of you show each other several different posts which made you both laugh until the final movie started.

It was another talking Buster movie, which this one also happened to be one of your top three favorites called Speak Easily. Even though most fans considered his talking movies to not be good at all, mostly due to how MGM treated him, making a character for him that acted like a total buffoon, there were still a few decent ones and this was one of them.

The audience watched as the timid and shy Professor Post, Buster’s character, was told by his assistant to get out and see the world because the Professor was such a lonely person. He told his assistant that even though he wanted to, he couldn’t afford to spend his money to indulge on “a whim”.

Giggles from all the kids throughout the theater came when the assistant gave the Professor a letter saying that he inherited $750,000 which made the Professor excited and that he decided he was going to go out and “buy companionship”. Laughter happened while you all watched the Professor pack his trunk with anything he grabbed, including his own bed.

Quietness came while the screen showed the Professor board the train, meet the manager of a dancing troupe that was on the same train and immediately fall head over heels for one of the dancers named Pansy. Aww’s filled the theater while watching the Professor take care of a baby from someone that was part of the troupe but laughter rang out when the Professor noticed his trunk wasn’t on the train and stopped it, causing an argument with the luggage man.

Gasps came from the kids as you all found out that the letter the Professor got was actually written by his assistant only to help get him out and see the world because the assistant couldn’t stand seeing the Professor be so lonely from day to day.

Laughter came and went throughout the rest of the movie as the audience watched the Professor miss his train, meet back up with the dancing troupe at the opera house and quietness fell upon the theater when the sheriff came to take the troupes things but then the Professor paid the man which then made the manager decide to let the Professor take over the show and manage it to repay him for his kindness.

More laughter came with seeing the Professor trying to direct the show so they could get it on Broadway, get somewhat flustered and tongue-tied with a spoiled actress who joined the production, incorporating new dance moves into the show, the actress “buttering up” the Professor and then seeing the two of them get drunk at her apartment.

Even more laughter happened when both of them fell asleep in her apartment and the Professor not realizing what happened until he woke up the next morning and tried to sneak out quietly but didn’t even manage to make it out of the bedroom without waking her.

As more laughs came and went through the last bit of the movie with the show being put on, the manager finding out the Professor didn’t have all that money, the show crew trying to keep the Professor away from the stage and Buster causing chaos that only he would know how to do, it was sure a delight to end the night with.

When the screen went black and the lights came on to say that night number three was over, you and Steve waited until almost everyone was gone to walk back to the car. Linking your arm to Steve’s as you slowly walked through the parking lot, you placed your head on his shoulder.

“So, can I ask you yet if you’ve been having fun with this?”

You looked up at him and giggled. “And I’ll say again, do you really have to ask? This has been one of the greatest dates we’ve done.”

He smiled at you and kissed the top of your head. “You’re exactly right.”

#avengers imagine #marvel imagine #steve rogers #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers x reader

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starrypawz · 5 years

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Things Tumblr could’ve done to prevent this mess

Decided from day 1 tumblr was a no nsfw zone

Decided from day 1 tumblr was an 18+ only site

Decided from day 1 to have the site broken into age gated sections

Decided from day 1 to have a functioning safe mode

Decided from day 1 to have a mandatory safe mode on the accounts of minors

Decided from day 1 to have content filtering inbuilt

Decided from day 1 that nsfw blogs can’t be viewed without a tumblr account

Decided from day 1 to make it easier to lock down your tumblr to control your audience

Made it so that when a user tags their original content nsfw that tag wll carry over to other reblogs

Allow people to set their posts to no reblogs allowed

Have a functioning report and banning system that WORKS and keeps banned users off the site

Have a working block system that can’t be easily evaded

Put in safeguards for account creation to make it harder for bot accounts to be made

Actually listened to users expressing their concern about bots and inappropriate TOS breaking content WHEN IT FIRST STARTED TO HAPPEN

#test

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aflawedfashion · 5 years

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Edit: this post is old and outdated. If you found it because you’re trying to get out of safe mode... unfortunately, that’s no longer possible. We’re all in safe mode now.

As Tumblr automatically hides more and more posts behind the adult content wall in search results, I feel like it needs to be more publicized how to turn this off. Most people don’t even know this option exists. It’s entirely separate from safe mode.

Some posts do seem to disappear entirely, but a significant number of posts that don’t show up in search results are not just disappearing into a void, but are being automatically placed behind Tumblr’s adult content lock.

In the upper right hand corner of your search results, you’ll find a lock on the website:

Unlock that to see more posts. it will unlock porn, but if you’re in an edit tag or a ship tag, that’s unlikely to be a significant problem for most shows and ships. It’s more likely that you’re missing out on regular posts from fans that you actually want to see in those tags than you will get overloaded with porn spam.

Note: there’s definitely a lot of adult content on this site. You may want to selectively lock and unlock that based on what searches you’re making, if you’re in public, and your comfort level with explicit content.

I’ve switched to an iPhone, but when I was on android, if you scrolled the top bar with search options all the way to the side, that’s where you could find the lock. I don’t know if this has changed or not in the last year.

#on ios it's somewhere in the settings and frankly it still hides things #because ios has strict rules #and now apparently they've even removed it from the app store #i expect it will come back even more locked down #if you have the tumblr app downloaded on your iphone right now don't delete it until it comes back #although I believe you can get it back in your purchased app history

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ceejay1163 · 5 years

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The Teal* Bronco (*Turquoise)

First off I want to tag the amazing @aquadolan whose hilariously accurate reaction videos make me laugh cry every time I see them and makes me feel like we are experiencing the video together and having a laugh like a couple of mates despite being in opposite sides of the world.

Now for my reactions to 'Tricking my brother into thinking his car was flipped'

The ring mmhmmm just yes

The clapping tho? Not about it

Ethan has a shorter attention span then me and that's impressive

I did not pick the boys to like roller skating although they ice skate so it makes sense

Little bitch haha

I like the jumper. It looks fuzzy and cozy

How long did this take to plan? Honestly it seems like it would be taken forever

Roasting the matchingness to the car

He seems to actually be jealous that Gray's favourite car isn't the one he bought. That's adorable. Fuck I'm not even 2 mins into the video

And now the car is broken

Wait did I fuck up? Am I recording?

The gum Ethan. Eww for fuck sake mate don't be a pig.

'I have really bad attentional problems' yeah.. your English might need some work too

When's the last time I ate? -literally something I say most days

Roast him for dropping out of school and not remembering common phrases and sayings

Why do all Ethans pranks involve Graysons cars?

Also not wanting to say what time you wake up. Same

Laughing at yourself

I'm cool, I'm cool actually no I'm not

Groggy or drunk?

Slap. Pain kink anyone?

That damn projector

Air quotes

Did anyone understand the car mumbo jumbo? Like at all? Did anyone care?

Good job keeping a straight face Ethan. He won't suspect a thing.

Fun-ny

Why do boys turn everything into challenges? My nephews do it all the time

Full actor mode

Too many words in Google mate. Google doesn't care why you need a Photoshop artist

More air quotes. Except out of sync.

It's just a prank bro.

Bitter he can't go skating. Poor bubba

Morning voice half an octave lower. Yes please

Groaning. Thank you

I always end up falling asleep at least twice after waking up the first time before getting up. V relatable

Him jumping into bed to pretend to be asleep reminds me of being a kid and bolting through the house in the middle of the night after getting up to get a drink or something, trying to avoid monsters or waking up the parents

Jumpers with shorts?

He's got slippers. Awww

Realising a flaw in his plan when the car doesn't work.

Too many cars in the driveway

CRINGEY PHOTOS. WOO.

Fucking drama queen

That stupid photoshopped photo

Real us. Not actor mode us haha

Mr Dolan 😏

Doesn't analyze it too much. Good idea

He has such bloke-ish child like writing

The calf tattoo 🥺

Socks and slides Grayson? That's almost as bad as socks and sandals. Fucking hell

Love a man in light grey sweats

Run Ethan go back to bed. You're so grounded (idk)

He pulled Ethans hip so hard. Jesus

What is that bike thingy in the background?

WHO DOESN'T LOCK THEIR FUCKING CAR??? YOU FUCKING IMBECILE

Now Gray let's put on our big boy thinking caps. It's not Ethans fault. Entirely. You also didn't lock the fucking car

Booty 👀

Not knowing if you have insurance. Mate you should look into that. (Also a very me thing to not know)

Gray is loosing it. Like actually looks like he's gonna do the frustrated crying thing

"That's not chill you need to fix that." Pretty sure sleeping is pretty chill. Also how does one fix being a heavy sleeper (other then by having kids)

"You need to be able to wake up in the morning and get shit done" no need to call me out like that

Let me call the *mumble mumble mumble*

It's fucking turquoise- whelp fuck have to change the title

Who steals a turquoise car at 9am? He's loosing it

Awe he doesn't want people to get hurt. Cutie

Seriously why hasn't he called the police yet? When I got home from my nanas funeral to find my house broken into the first thing I did was call the cops. And then cry cos it was like 10pm and I'd just driven like 12 hrs so I was hella tired

He's V loud. And then V quiet.

You motherfucker. Ok rude but understandable

That sigh of relief and the laughter

All of the adrenaline just left Gray immediately. Also hiding under a blankie? adorable

"Where did you put it?" Immediately forgets haha

Did you ruin it and turn it pink or something? You're getting a rep E and why does Gray assume it would be painted pink?

The sound effect over Gray pulling up his pants to hide his plumbers crack 😂

You need to rub it out. I mean ok sure

"I kinked up bro" just why 😂

Slap. SPINNING. It's a theme park ride

You stole my car- Dude where's my car movie anyone?

Car upside down you say? Forshadowing

Grayson gives up on life.

Nope never mind he's dramatically throwing himself onto the bed and screaming into the blankets like a teenage girl

Also booty

FROG

Don't dance Grayson

It's all in the puff bro

Mr Dillon, not Dolan, Dillion

Grayson has left the building look

Nose boop

The eye movement. Wait you what?

Beard pulling

Give me the phone. No you are having the phone. Ok fine.

Intense eye contact for real tho

That dumbass look on his face. Grayson is shooketh to hell

Do they even understand any of this car mumbo jumbo? Does it even make any sense?

I don't know shit about insurance. Seriously dude that's not smart

MY CAR

That's not chill bro that's not chill at all. Putting them on a ban for the words chill and bro. More to be added. They use those words more then I use the word mate and that's impressive

I'm taking the phone and subtly suggesting human error (negligence) and a potential law suit

Oh you have footage? Talk to my older brother

I don't know much about cars. Dude

More stupid looks from Gray

I don't wanna see it

More screaming

More yelling Grayson

We can move your car but it's gonna cost you more money

Not falling for that pic

Just put it on the next one. Gray it's not a fucking bus. There's no schedule to have the next one come out. Use your head darlin'

More yelling in the car and swearing

How did he organise the street thing? Like actually.

Also surely it's illegal to pretend to have roadworks and fuck up traffic

VROOM. You go lil blue car

BULGE 👀 this is when I stopped paying attention the first time I watched it.

What is the camera guy (kyle?) wearing? Who said that be one were allowed to be a thing again? I'm not impressed

Grayson is v frustrated

DON'T LITTER

Neither of you should be allowed to dance. Its not good

That's the wrong question to ask about the camera guy's clothes

Fist clap

Wait where's the car? Is it safe? Poor Gray his brain is malfunctioning

Camera goes to Grayson. Ooh look bulge. Pans away. Move back ooh bulge.

If they keep upping the ante someone's gonna get hurt

I don't know what's inside of me. Never a good thing to say

Still allergic to dogs 🥺

HOLY SHIT THAT HAPPENED

I haven't heard you scream that much for that long 👀

Grayson's pretty loud. I would like to test that. Please and thank you.

Deep breathing

SOOOO HARD. (I volunteer)

I am going to prank the actual s out of Ethan. Really taking the not swearing thing seriously huh

Sure whatever you say. He doesn't believe you'll get him back Gray. Kick his ass

Bruh

Eric deserves a medal for his phone acting. Well done faceless dude named Eric

I give up. I give up on everything. If that's not a fucking mood

Double bitched sounds like it should mean something else. Just saying

Boob caress

My guard's up. No your guard can't be up. Pretty sure that's not how it works Grayson

Just don't hurt me. Grayson is so not listening to him. He's still mad

No rules

It was fake There's no rules

Ethan being hurt Gray doesn't love his present

Still mad.

Rubs sweat all over comfy jumper. Childish

HE STILL LOOKS FUCKING LIVID.

Alrighty take three of finishing this thing. Tumblr crashed yesterday after I spent like 2 hours writing this and deleted half my comments. I couldn't finish it then cos it was almost 2am and I had work today so I redid it from like the 20 minute mark of the video. Then I saved it to my drafts And published it but it deleted the last like 5 minutes of comments so I had to redo them again. Here's hoping Tumblr sorts it's shit out cos it's late and I have work again tomorrow. 🐨

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