#unconciously so as to not have to deal with things ending bc that scares me

[szczylpierdolony]

life is falling through my fingers more that usually

#i’ve been in a pretty much constant state of panic since january #and it’s gotten worse recently bc of 1. thesis writing (or lack thereof) #2. administrative problems at uni that i caused due to the constant state of anxiety and depression #like whyyyy do things like going to the uni office send me spiraling like nothing else #and i’ve been feeling weird and disconnected for a while now and nothing seems to interest me anymore #like i’m light headed in the worst way and i think if one thing goes badly i’ll genuinely fall down crying #and i can’t seem to do anything productive bc of the anxiety either #ok i checked usos. the administrative problem got more or less solved #oh thank god #i love depression loveee it love causing problems for myself that i later have to bother other people about bc i can’t solve them by myself #esp when you have to admit to them that mental illness is what caused them bc even when they’re sympathetic and nice about it i still feel #like such a pathetic idiot my god #also i’ve been thinking a lot abt how a pattern that repeats in my life is the lack of closure #from silly things to more serious ones #like how i didn’t attend my elementary school graduation nor the hs one #the first one bc of travelling and the second bc of covid #so i just closed my laptop and then went to pick up my diploma after matura results and that was it i never saw any of my teachers or #thanked them etc #and how all my friendships that died out were this kind of sudden drop like nothing happened but we just stopped talking one day and that #was it and idk where we stand #and how i seem to leave loose threads everywhere i go and i can’t tell if it’s just a coincidence or if i do that on purpose but #unconciously so as to not have to deal with things ending bc that scares me #i’ve never felt grounded in any moment and it’s so strange #also yeah yeah weird behaviour meant to save me from abandonment whatever #📓 #niedziela wieczór i humor popsuty co mogę powiedzieć

[mrs-hollandstan]

What about mob!tom's girlfriend suffering a miscarriage? He can be in his office when she comes in bleeding and then all his men is looking at her and when he rush to reach her, she falls unconcious into his arms? You decide the end bc you're dope. Thank youuuuu.

Please don't read if you're sensitive to miscarriage.

[[MORE]]

You and Tom could both describe the difficulties of getting pregnant. You both wanted it though and when you discovered you were, the both of you were more than excited to be welcoming a little love. However, statistically speaking, one in four women miscarry and eight percent of those miscarriages occur in the first twelve weeks.

It seemed like you were blessed with the news of your little love before it was brutally ripped away from you. It started with cramping and then what seemed to be a period on overdrive. The pain and bleeding scared you and the scene that walked into Tom's office had him rushing to your aid. The men out in the hallway stared at you wide eyed as you rushed to your boyfriend with tears streaming down your face and blood staining the white dress you wear.

Tom was out of his chair before you were even in the room completely, luckily catching you before you collapsed from a mixture of the emotions, the blood loss and the sheer shock. He's distraught, carrying you out to his car and hurrying you to the nearest hospital. He's not told the details of your predicament, but by the looks of it, he knows exactly what's happened. He knows that you've lost what you worked so hard for.

When you come to, groggy and disoriented, he's right at your side, doing his vest to comfort you,

"'S alright angel." He says, close to your face. You reach up for his hand, holding it,

"Tom-"

"Yeah baby?" He poses, searching your eyes as they gloss over. He knows that you know and vice versa. He nods as your lip starts to quiver, a single tear slipping from your eye,

"I'm sorry Tom." You sob. He clicks his tongue and holds you close, your face buried in his shoulder as you cry. He rubs up your back, holding back his own tears as he strives to comfort you. Stroking your hair down, he sighs,

"I'm just glad I didn't lose both of you. I would’ve killed myself if I’d lost you too.” He tells you. You pull back, letting him clear your tears,

“But… w-we worked so hard for th-is and now it’s just… gone. Our baby is gone Tom.” You chome out. It breaks his heart to hear you say it, but it’s reality and you have to deal with it. He nods, leaning in to let you lay your head against his shoulder,

“I know love, I know. And you and I will get through it, I promise.” He swears, letting you cry into him. You feel empty, upset with yourself for not being able to do the one thing you two wanted to do more than anything. Tom would, and could never blame you, but you blamed yourself. And he knew that. Rubbing up your back, he sighs, leaning his face into your neck. He kisses your shoulder, the both of you just holding each other,

"I know it's hard love, trust me. I hate this just as much as you do but it'll all pay off when we get another baby. Once we get our rainbow baby." He explains, comforting you somewhat effectively. You'd never be over the feeling of losing your little love. Leaning back, he takes hold of your hand, running his thumb over your knuckles,

"You and me are here. We're gonna try again, trust me. We will try for another baby before you know it and I know this sucks, it really fuckung does, but we're gonna be okay love." He promises. You nod, sniffling as he strokes your tears away, caressing your cheek,

"I love you more than anything and we are going to get our baby. I promise, okay?" You nod, settling into him when he makes himself comfortable beside you in bed, your head laid against his shoulder,

"We are never going to forget the love that went into conceiving that baby, but we'll get another little love soon." He concludes, squeezing you to him. And as much as it hurts, you know he's right.

#dad tom #tom holland gif #tom holland #tom holland smut #tom holland imagines #tom holland fan fic #tom holland one shot #mob!tom x reader #mob!tom holland #mob!tom #tw: misscarriage #trigger warning: misscarriage