#you're the one who changes people (widojest)

[reilora-borealis]

.... and you're NOT gonna tell us about the Shadowgast Playlist? Please 🫴, hand it over.

I said in my original post this was my toxic trait... nonetheless I am SO glad someone took the bait 😈

I'm not going to post the link because I value my spotify privacy and also I have an embarrassing username that no one needs to know about. However, since you asked nicely (and let's be honest, I wasn't expecting anyone to care! so thank you!), I will share ✨ my personal top 5 shadowgast songs ✨ with a bit of context for each.

If you're just here to roast my music taste, bear in mind... I said toxic trait. Proceed at your own risk.

1. Time in a Bottle by Jim Croce

"If I could make days last forever / If words could make wishes come true / I'd save every day like a treasure and then / Again, I would spend them with you..."

This one has two meaning imo: first, early-campaign Caleb wishing he could change the past to save his parents' lives; later, Essek wishing he had more time to spend with Caleb. The original version is beautiful, but there is also a cover by Yungblud (yes, it's on the Hobbs & Shaw soundtrack) that's badass but a very different vibe.

2. Lilith by Halsey

"I'm perfection when it comes to first impressions / I romanticize and then I get to stressing / Big brain like I'm teaching at a lesson / Baby, it's a blessing..."

Every time this song comes on I legit yell ESSEK ANTHEM! because it is. This is the Hot Villain theme song. The beat is so sexy. The lyrics are on point ("I am disgusting / I've been corrupted / And by now I don't need not help to be destructive"). The vibes are just immaculate.

3. No Halo by Brockhampton

"Went to church for the hell of it, stumbled in drunk as shit / Been going through it again / Been talking to myself, wondering who I am / Been thinking I am better than Him..."

Look. I could write an entire essay about this one song. Wizard hubris, depression, and the crisis of faith Essek goes through when the Nein find out about his betrayal. Also, for those who theorize Essek is the unwilling chosen of the Luxon - he could, in fact, be "God's special mess".

4. X&Y by Coldplay

"I dive in at the deep end / You become my best friend / I want to love you but I don't know if I can / I know something is broken / And I'm trying to fix it / Trying to repair it / Any way I can..."

Two characters who both think they are terrible people that don't deserve love, trying to be better and trying to better each other? And they fall in love? And they're narrative foils? No one is doing it like them! (Plus the chorus "You and me are drifting into outer space" just screams ~wizards in the star room~.)

5. All The Stars by Kendrick Lamar feat. SZA (album version)

"Tell me what you gon' do to me / Confrontation ain't nothing new to me / You can bring a bullet, bring a sword, bring a morgue / But you can't bring the truth to me..."

I don't know how this song manages to be both broody and uplifting at the same time, but it is and it's perfection. It's the grimness of reality and the hope for the future, the refrain of "All the stars are closer" symbolizing all the possibilities that are now within reach.

And oh boy, I don't have time to write about the whole playlist but if you've made it this far, here are some bonus mini listicles because this is my Roman Empire 😌

Entire playlist of just shadowgast-coded Hozier songs:

Arsonist's Lullabye

In The Woods Somewhere

De Selby (pt. 2)

Someone New

Like Real People Do

Moment's Silence

From Eden

All My Homies Hate Trent Ikithon songs:

Heathens by Twenty One Pilots

Eat Your Young by Hozier

Buzzkill by Mothica

Another Brick In The Wall, pt. II by Pink Floyd

My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark by Fall Out Boy

Other ships? In my shadowgast playlist? It's more likely than you think:

The Cave by Mumford & Sons (widobrave)

Cringe by Matt Maeson (widojest)

Tessellate by alt-J (blumendrei)

EDM wizard songs if you're into that sort of thing (I am):

Time Stops by Virtual Riot

I'd Love To Change The World (Matstubs Remix) by Jetta

I Could Be Anything by the Glitch Mob feat. Elohim

New Eyes by Echos

Keep in mind this is just a handful of songs out of like a hundred, so I welcome you to give me the benefit of the doubt and fill in the rest of the playlist in your mind with whatever makes me seem cool to you.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk, I am sorry it took me four days to write this... 😅

#shadowgast

[quantummindclassicalheart]

Master post of quantum's Critical Role fic

You can now find me on AO3 as FiveCamellia! I will be gradually archiving older fic there. Various other things I’ve written including scicomm stuff and poetry live in my general #writing tag, feel free to check it out! For scicomm specifically, check out my #quantum talks quantum tag.

(This is a repost of my old pinned post, but with the new post format.)

a dream within a dream (AO3, Tumblr. New! Completed 2023/01/21.) > When the fog of Rumblecusp steals away Caleb’s memories, Jester must help him remember. But this time, it’s going to take a little more than a fifth-level spell slot. For Widojest Secret Santa 2022.

The Lovers’ Lie (original song) > There is an old folk song that is sung in Exandria.  It goes by a lot of titles–In Marquet it’s commonly known as The Liar’s Love, while natives of Xhorhas would know it as The Fey Groom, and the elves of Syngorn’s version has a title that translates to “The Sacrifice of Truth for Love.” This is one bard’s rendition of the song in Common, as accompanied by ukulele.

verbal and somatic (AO3) > In which Jester has a creative idea for how to use the Polymorph spell, and with a truly heroic effort (and the benefit of War Caster), Caleb succeeds on a series of concentration checks with increasingly high DC. (AKA: Widojest body swap sexy times.) (Post-campaign, established relationship AU.)

a soft place to land (AO3) > A few years after their travels with the Mighty Nein, Caleb and Jester reunite for the summer and kinda sorta fall in love all over again. (Post-campaign, as the summary suggests, but more or less canon-compliant)

a dream of flight (AO3) > My first Loquaerryn fic, about their first dance (and what comes after). Laerryn is used to taking the lead, but when she meets Loquatius Seelie, he challenges everything she knows about following.

rainy days and twisting braids > Yasha braids Beau’s hair, and softness follows. For Beauyasha Week 2022 Day 2: Hair. (Takes place post-campaign.)

like it’s the last time > A Widojest epilogue “missing scene,” i.e. the final conversation Caleb and Jester never got in canon. It’s the night before Fjord and Jester leave Nicodranas, and the Nein are throwing a party. Everything should be great. Except Caleb’s been distant lately, and Jester wants to know why. (Takes place during the Campaign 2 finale, roughly.)

waves of memory > A short Shadowgast piece based on some merperson!Essek AU art.

we must all tend our gardens > A character study of everyone's favorite drow hotboi and his complicated relationship with faith, as told through gardening. (Takes place during the Campaign 2 finale.)

[podfic] Die Smaragdwelle (Jade_Sabre) > A reading of Die Smaragdwelle, a fairy tale about a princess swallowed up by an emerald wave and the wizard who had to find her. (Featuring my vocal impressions of all the Mighty Nein.)

und andere Zemnische Volksmärchen > What if things had gone just a little differently post-Katzenprinz? (Fluff. Fluff is what happens.) For Widojest Week 2021 Day 6: Der Katzenprinz.

four-and-a-half waltzes of caleb widogast > A series of vignettes in which Caleb shares four dances with four of the most important people in his life, and learns to embrace the magic of possibility. (Spoilers for all of Campaign 2, minus the finale.)

the divine transmutation of the self > In which magic changes Veth, and Veth changes her mind about magic. (Spoilers through C2E97)

drawn together > Making stuff for (and with) the people you care about is a love language. In which Beau decides to learn how to draw, and also learns a few other things along the way. (Takes place sometime post-C2E111) 

a taste of summer > In which Caleb’s hidden talent for baking and Jester’s love of sweets collide in the best possible way. (Takes place sometime post-C2E111) 

sunrise over eiselcross > A little scene between Fjord and Jester from the morning after their big conversation in C2E118.

you're still there > Beau has a nightmare about a path not taken. Yasha’s there to help her through it. Cuddles ensue. (Takes place sometime post-C2E111)

disguise selves > An AU where Caleb and Jester are (human) roommates, preparing for a Halloween costume party over Zoom. Jester being Jester, she insists on a photo shoot in costume. Everything goes better than expected. (no spoilers)

the nature of possibility > Two things possessed me to write this: the concept of including some actual thermodynamics in a fic about dunamancy, and the idea of hand contact during a spellcraft lesson. What ensued was nearly a thousand words of Shadowgast. (Takes place sometime post-C2E77)

an unnatural tide > Caleb doesn't normally forget things. But Rumblecusp isn't a normal island. What did he forget that last morning? Here's my best guess. (Spoilers for C2E105)

#writing #critical role #mighty nein #widojest #(mostly) #if you're new to my fic: here's a taster menu #like it's the last time is bittersweet but hopeful #a soft place to land is post-canon fix-it fluff #a dream within a dream is a character-driven magical adventure into caleb's memories and trauma #und andere Zemnische Volksmärchen diverges from canon right after Katzenprinz and turns into straight fluff #and a taste of summer is my take on a widojest baking fic. it is as sweet as a strawberry cake should be #that's just the widojest fics-- i also have a bit of shadowgast and beauyasha in there. check them out!

[whatkindofnameisella]

BEFORE THE BEGINNING (dealer’s choice)

from the writing askbox meme thingy!

this one says three sentences but who do you think you're talking to. i thought about this for 30 seconds and then wrote five pages in my journal like a madman before i went to bed last night. normal christmas things.

a scene long preceding the events of the never-quite-done 1880s/90s widojest au <3

There is a man that visits her mother's house.

Not that that's anything strange. There are many men that come to her mother's house, for many reasons. Why wouldn't they? There is their beautiful villa and the beautiful grounds and her beautiful mother, who sings with her heavenly voice at the most incredible parties almost every evening. Women come too, that's how amazing the parties are. Jester knows it. For a fact. She's allowed to attend them twice a month.

No, it's not the man that is strange. It's that he won't take off his top hat.

In the foyer? Top hat. In the front parlor? Top hat. In the smoking room? Top hat. In the ballroom, where people crane their necks to see and push their neighbors aside, and press eagerly shoulder to shoulder? In the corner, frowning, with his top hat. Jester's tried to get it off --- has tried bribing the footman and waxing the floors and standing very, very quietly behind the man and very, very slowly inching her hand up to his brim. And when those things have failed, she has employed her best sneaking skills to try and catch him de-chapeaued. She has lurked in dark corners, and waited. She has stolen one of the dresses with the very low necklines that she is not supposed to touch, and held a mask over her face and perched in the back of the room with all the ladies in that all the men eventually come to, and blush in, and she has waited. She has crept through the thin passageways between the walls, and put her eyes to the cracks in the plaster of the bathroom, and she has waited.

She has waited, and waited. But he has never come. He has never removed his hat.

That is, until luck finds her --- until she is leaning out of a window in one of the lonely, westward facing first floor alcoves, chin in her hands, and there are shadows moving in the warm dark.

She can't see; the only light is from her window, already dim, already half covered by her silhouette cast out wide on the lawn. What to do? Her pulse leaps. She darts down beneath the windowsill, crushing the silk of her dress, and cringes. Come tomorrow she'll be in even more trouble with the Chateau's head laundress than she already is for last Friday's grass stains. But ---

This is when luck comes into it.

"Shit!"

The expletive rings out across the empty gardens, and through Jester's window, and to her ears, the too-late-quieted rasp of a woman's voice, deep and callused. Jester slowly places her fingers on the sill; she pulls herself up only just enough for her eyes to peek over it; she gazes out on the sparsely lit lawn.

In the light of her mother's chandeliers leaking out into the cricket-song darkness, there is the man, dusting himself off. Holding his hat in one hand. Checking that his long, twisted hair has not come out of its bun with the other.

Jester gasps.

The sound is too loud. It escapes her mouth and enters the air and echoes, echoes --- and, what is now clear is a woman, looks up. Though her skin is tan her eyes are blue, and they pierce Jester, find her own just perched over the windowsill, from all the way across the lawn. It is all so clear to see, now --- the woman's jaw is just the slightest bit too soft, her lashes the slightest bit too long, her nose small and darling. But she places her hat back upon her head and everything sharpens. She looks not a woman in men's clothes, but a young, strapping man in his finest. The change is subtle, and wondrous, and amazingly natural.

The woman tips the brim of her hat. "Evening," she says, casual and terse, both a courtesy and a threat at once. Then she turns and continues on her way, hurrying across the gardens, wide shoulders disappearing into the night.

Jester lifts herself up from the windowsill to watch the woman's silhouette fade away. It is better than Jester ever could have wished.

Come two more weeks, she will join her mother's festivities, and she will make herself a new friend.

#rough ending but who cares. fun to write. #not 2 brag but i do love how i adapted them to this au. if i can ever finish it i hope you all will love it too. #cr #m9 #ella writes #if u can't tell this is jester and beau. just fyi. #ty ani for sending in this ask <3333333

[florallychaotic]

I am a firm believer in the fact that the widojest fans absolutely have the right to unashamedly go crazy go stupid right now

#widojest #cr spoilers #cr 2x140 #you're the one who changes people (widojest)

[tricktress]

thinking about the transmutative qualities of love .... might fuck around and write a poem about it. 

#i wasnt even in widojest brain mode but i was thinking of it in regards to like just the concept of love making u want to be better #and then started thinking about the word transumattive #thought about our fav transmutive wizard and here we are #'im the transmutive wizard but you're the one who changes people' #if ship not canon why they make me cry???

[quantummindclassicalheart]

nein nine Caleb Widogast valentines/pick-up lines. or: Widogast's Witty Seduction

I burn for you, valentine.

Would you like to see my magical tower?

Polymorph isn't the only thing about me that's poly.

I would bend reality for you, valentine.

No need for Haste-- let's take it Slow tonight.

I think I've still got a few charges left in my Staff of Power.

Wie spät ist es? My Keen Mind says it's time for us to get it on.

Let's make some magic together, valentine.

Who needs time travel when I can shape the future with you instead?

(previously: twelve Essek valentines)

#critical role #caleb widogast #the mighty nein #widojest #blumendrei #shadowgast #(by implication) #i almost wrote the 'i'm the transmutation wizard but you're the one who changes people' line #and then i remembered that was fully canon #there was also one that was far too risque for me to write out here #it started with nott eating frumpkin and you can fill in the rest #(also shout out to agentmintea's tags on my last post-- inspired me to write this caleb-themed set)

[florallychaotic]

I'm just saying in context of a Hadestown AU, Jester is Orpheus and Caleb is Eurydice but also Bren is Hades and High Priestess Lavorre is Persephone so that's cool for me to imagine

#widojest #please i can't be the only one qho sees this #please ask me if you want me to elaborate cause honestly i need an excuse to #you're the one who changes people (widojest) #series: critical role #ch: jester lavorre #ch: caleb widogast #caleb widogast #jester lavorre

[quantummindclassicalheart]

polymorph

a poem for Jester Lavorre

My love is ever-changing, and yet I would know her anywhere. In the blue of her skin and the violet of her eyes, Behind the glamours and the transmutations, it is always her.

There was a time when all I knew was fire, the kind that spreads and blazes and consumes without a second thought. There was a time when I was both candle and flame, burning myself up to keep the master warm. I suppose that too is a kind of transmutation.

And then I was stone, unknowing and unfeeling, as the years eroded my form and I, cold and insensate, waited to turn to dust.

But she changes people. She has changed my heart, Transmuted it from stone into something new. With her I am a firework bursting into color, I am a campfire on a winter's night, I am the embers in the hearth and the light that burns in the stars above.

I do not love her because she has changed me. She has changed me because I love her, And she loved me when I was still stone.

#critical role #widojest #WidojestWeek2021 #caleb widogast #jester lavorre #poetry #writing #prompt: polymorph #i haven't done poetry in a while! #i was thinking of how jester always turns herself into blue creatures #and that quote about how 'i'm the transmutation wizard but you're the one who changes people' #also the bit from avatar involving the sun warriors where aang and zuko learn the true nature of firebending #fire can be dangerous but it's more than death and destruction #and i think that's part of Caleb's journey too #(also: Caleb describes himself as stone but Jester calls herself 'the sapphire' so... parallels?)

[florallychaotic]

Was reviewing the extremely rough outline I started making last night for a widojest fic and ran into this gem:

#i mean even when im tired im right #widojest #you're the one who changes people (widojest) #okay to rb #ch: caleb widogast #ch: jester lavorre #series: critical role #who knows when this will become a reality but the goal is to someday have it be reality