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obscenely domestic starter sentences

❝ Stop man-handling the ice cream! ❞ ❝ Change the channel and I’ll kill you. ❞ ❝ You actual shit, you started without me!? ❞ ❝ Since I’m up, by default I will get your _____. ❞ ❝ Did you just throw a sock ball at me!? ❞ ❝ How about this, how about you fight the rest of the cereal by yourself and I’ll courageously make pancakes for those of us who want a little warmth in our mornings. ❞ ❝ Whiskey is a breakfast staple, anyone who says otherwise is fucking lying. ❞ ❝ My underwear are now bright pink because of you, thank you very much. ❞ ❝ Can you stop kicking me? ❞ ❝ I don’t go shopping I get and retrieve. I have a narrow focus, unlike some people. ❞ ❝ Did you walk the dog? ❞ ❝ You, me, PJ’s, pizza, bed. The PJ’s are optional. ❞ ❝ Only you could make the idea of beating up already dead meat sound attractive. ❞ ❝ I can feel you staring at me, why don’t you just come in? ❞ ❝ Good news; we have internet again! ❞ ❝ I don’t want to file taxes, why don’t you be the adult? ❞ ❝ You snuggling me over an open flame is an invitation for my nipples to disappear. ❞ ❝ I know you’re scared of my mother but contemplating arson isn’t the way to fix this. ❞ ❝ I installed a stripper pole while you were gone because it made me think of you. ❞ ❝ All I was doing was helping the barista learn to spell my name properly. The song and dance should NOT have gotten you that embarrassed. ❞ ❝ How about we just never mention this again? ❞ ❝ Have you seen my earrings/necklace/rings? ❞  ❝ You are literally the child we both want/neither of us want. ❞ ❝ Did you call the doctor about that? ❞ ❝ Let me pop it, just let me pop it, nothing bad will happen, I swear! ❞ ❝ You almost left me at the gas station! ❞ ❝ Alright look! Next time you want to barbecue with the hair dryer, just make sure I’m home! ❞ ❝ I didn’t think the sink had this much water inside of it. ❞ ❝ Don’t be mad, but _____. ❞

Bonus for multi-lingual situations: ❝ Can you translate the news for me? None of this makes sense. ❞ ❝ What is the word for this? *points at ____* I keep wanting to say ‘printer’ but I feel that is wrong. ❞ ❝ Next time she calls you a ____ you just reply with _____. ❞ ❝ I’m sorry but my pronunciation must sound really bad to you. ❞ ❝ Shit! The government doesn’t have my alphabet, put this in a way I understand! ❞ ❝ Can you finger spell that for me, I’m not quite up to that level yet. ❞ ❝ That was said so horribly wrong but you sounded very cute while trying. A for effort. ❞

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Protective sentence starters??

because visualizing muses in these situations generally equates to puppies guarding each other and its wonderful

“No, don’t do that it’s not safe.”

“You’re scared of that, aren’t you?”

“Don’t touch her/him!”

“It’s cute that you tried to protect me and all, but you’re like a foot shorter than me, you know?”

“I will always step in between you and something like that.”

“Why? Because I don’t want you to get hurt, that’s why!”

“Do you think just because my feet don’t touch the bottom of the pool that I need a floatie?”

“The stepping stool is unecessary.”

“I’m not apologizing for what I said to that asshole/jerk… He/she was saying terrible things about you.”

“If you say another word about her/him, you’ll regret it.” 

“I don’t want to put you in that type of environment.”

“Make sure to tell me if you get worried, or nervous, or claustrophobic, or-”

“You could have been hurt.”

“I indirected him/her on Twitter for your honor.”

“I think you should leave this type of thing to me.”

“I’m gonna protect you.”

“You can hold onto me if you’re scared, you know?”

“I’m not leaving you alone.  Not now, not ever.”

“Let’s all watch a different movie.  This one freaks her/him out.”

“I get where you’re coming from dude, but honestly shut the hell up and don’t talk about her/him that way.”

“She/He isn’t an object.”

“She/he told me what you did, and all I’m gonna do is tell you to stay away.”

“You don’t know anything about her/him!”

“What?  You think that was funny?  You just insulter her/him, and expect me to laugh?”

“I’m not gonna let you put up with that.”

“Really, if you told me to I’d go punch them for you.”

“Wait, let me walk you home.”

“I’ll drive you, please– please don’t go like this.”

“It’s dangerous.”

“I’m worried about you.”

“I meant it when I said I would protect you.”

“I’m not stepping aside until you back up.”

“It’s too cold for you to come out here without a jacket on.”

“I’ll go see what the noise was.”

“Stay on the phone with me.”

“Promise me you’ll be safe.”

“I don��t feel comfortable with you going there on your own.”

“He/She did what to you?”

“I won’t let you go through something like that again.”

“I’m not perfect, but I’m trying my hardest to do everything to keep you safe.”

“Stay behind me.”

“I promised your mom to make sure you didn’t do anything stupid tonight.”

“I love you.  Of course I’m gonna defend you like that.”

“No, he/she isn’t good enough to take you out.  Trust me, I know.” 

“Are you planning to stay glued to my side this whole evening?”

“I’ll be okay, because I know you’re back here ready to step in if I need you.”

“Thank you for always sticking with me.”

“I’m really worried about her/him, but I don’t think he/she wants me to call.”

“I don’t know what I would do if something happened to you.”

“Like, I don’t expect to ever have to take a bullet for you, but I would.”

send a name and a sentence xx

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Jealous Anti with phone and coworker

It’s just another normal evening at your house. You’re watching some TV all cuddled up in a blanket, while browsing around on your phone. A high-pitched ding goes off, its from a coworker you swapped numbers with a while back. “Hey Y/N! I was wondering if you wanted to maybe go grab some drinks with me tonight?” He says. You think for a moment before getting up and going to the closet in your bedroom. You sigh as you realize you have nothing to go out in. “Sorry, not tonight :/” you reply.

“Aw come on! Come have some fun with me!” He says back

“I don’t have anything to wear”

“A pretty girl like you would look great in anything. You’d look even better without anything on :p” You blush at how forward he is as you plop back down on the couch. Beside you is Anti, he must’ve just glitched onto the couch. “I bet I could help with the last part tonight” he says

Anti sees the deep blush on your cheeks and neck, suddenly very jealous. He knows that your all his, but no onevshould ever make you blush other than him. With a growl he makes the screen flash green and black, glitches on the screen make it impossible to do much of anything. You turn your head to glare at him, he shoots back with almost angry canines showing. “Anti, stop it” you say into the air. His eyes began to glow green as he takes control of your phone, scrolling thorough messages and photos. He sees a picture of you and some guy, he starts putting unconnected pieces together. “W̷h̴o̸ ̴i̸s̵ ̴h̸e̸?̵” Anti hisses as he moves back to the texts he’d sent. He takes note of their flirty nature before glitching into your phone, he grips and pulls at his hair as his head snaps from side to side. “ANTI! Enough, let me explain!” You say as he calms a bit and appears once again beside you.

“We just work together, he asked to go out for drinks tonight and I told him no. Before you had interrupted me I was going to tell him I had a boyfriend and that he shouldn’t talk that way about me.” You pause, seeing his fists unclench. “Anti, I love you. I would never cheat on you. I’m hurt that you think I could ever bring myself to go behind your back like that.” You let out a deep breath and just turn away from him. You pick up your phone to make sure your coworker doesn’t get the wrong idea, but the screen is filled with that weird glitchy text Anti always types in. It reads, “I love you, and I’m sorry” you turn back to him, practically leaping onto him.

“T̴h̸a̴t̸ ̴w̴a̴s̴ ̴a̷ ̷r̸e̵a̴l̴ ̶d̴i̸c̷k̴ ̴m̶o̴v̷e̶ ̵o̵n̴ ̴m̴y̷ ̶p̴a̴r̶t̴,̶ ̴l̶o̸v̴e̵.̵ ̸I̵'̷m̷ ̶s̷o̶r̶r̴y̶.̴” he says with a somber smile. You don’t say anything back, you only lean in and kiss him. It’s chaste and sweet as he hums when your fingers are entangled in his green hair. He wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you closer. When you break away, you lay your head on his chest. “I̶ ̶t̴a̴k̵e̵ ̵i̷t̸ ̸y̵o̵u̵ ̷f̶o̴r̷g̷i̶v̶e̵ ̵m̶e̷ ̷t̶h̸e̷n̵?̵” he chuckles as you nuzzle into his neck, a hand reaching up to play with his hair.

Anti lets a sound almost like a purr escape his throat as you continue to move your fingers through his hair, scratching his scalp with your nails every so often. For the longest time the two of you sit there, cuddling and enjoying each other’s company. You and Anti fight sometimes, but you wouldn’t want your night to end any other way than with you in his arms.

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I’m so fucking proud of you ily

You guys are the best ♥️

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You guyss!

I’m the lead in my new school’s competition play!

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Why are you so adorable? 💕

Aww! Why are you so sweet? 😋♥️

#britney babbles #send me asks #asks #the lovelies

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Welcome back!! *hugs*

Aaaaaa!! You should know.. I looovve hugs!! *hugs* ♥️

#britney babbles #send me asks #the lovelies

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Woooowie! Where the hecc have I been?!

I’m sure there’s at least a couple of you guys who might wonder where I’ve been for so so long 😅 I absolutely understand and I’m touched anyone noticed I wasn’t here in the first place! You guys are so sweet! I remember I said I was gonna get back to writing but, outta nowhere my life changed pretty dramatically. My parents lost their jobs and I was moved across the US. I left my friends, extended family, and so much more behind. It’s been a shakey couple of months. We don’t even have a proper house yet, we’re staying in a free house provided by my parents new company. I uh, I don’t even have a bed to sleep on or my own room right now 😪

I feel guilty about promising you guys new content and then never following through.

To make it up to you guys, everyone is welcome to ask me any questions or ask for short requests. I’m gonna start off slow, especially as I’m currently working two jobs to make the payment for my car.

Thanks guys!

I love you all very much!

I hope I can find the time to get back into writing stuff and making you guys happy!

Have a wonderful day! Drop by and come say hello whenever you feel like!

Byeee!! 💋

#guess whos here?! #britney babbles #announcement

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Hello! Could I request a Tyler x reader where she’s on Broadway (in the musical ‘Chicago’) But is still a part of teamiplier and everyone goes to see her? And she’s in Cell Block Tango and so when the show is done she’s goes and sees the boys and there like... intimidated? But Tyler is intimidated and like...oddly attracted to her? And that’s what leads to them confessing their feelings for each other? Sorry if it’s such a long request!

Absolutely!! As a big fan of musical theatre it’s hella cool to have a request like this! I’m excited to start writing it! Thanks for the request anon!!

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Questioning/Bisexual space moodboard, for anon  -(Helper Lavi)

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A Take on Loving You.

Loving you is the color purple. It’s the smell of warm tea on a cold night. The feeling of walking through soft grass without shoes. The sound of waves crashing on a beach, sparking under the summer sun.

God. The feeling of being with you is like missing a step on the stairs. Or like the bubbly, dizzy feeling of falling down after spinning in circles.

You’re the air in my lungs and the flowers planted in my heart. I wonder every day how you put them there with such ease.

Truth is, Nothing comes close to what you really are to me. Not the smell of a brand new book being looked over for the first time. Not the rush of running down a barren street till you can’t breathe. Not the way the stars look on a summer’s night. Not even the glow of candle light spilled in a dark room, casting romantic shadows.

I think I know what love is to me now.

It’s always been you.

#poetry #poems #love poems #love poem

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if u call me baby in that soft voice i’ll do whatever u want me to do