thepancakeboi

[thepancakeboi]

When you get this, please respond with five things that make you happy! Then, send to the last ten people in your notifications (anonymously if possible). You never know who might benefit from spreading positivity! (no obligation; but this made me happy and maybe it’ll make you happy as well.)

Admin: I haven't been on this in over a year omg-

So I am not dead. I just...have fallen from this hyperfixation. While I miss writing about Shuake and all, I just don't have the muse or time anymore. A shame, really.

But that's not what this is about. This is about positivity. Something I admittedly struggle with a lot. So, let's see...okay. Here we go, a dose of positivity.

My friends. I don't think this is too much of a shocker. But I really don't deserve the people in my life who I am privileged enough to call "friend".

Music. Whether it's listening to music or dabbling with creating it, music is what keeps me sane even on the days it feels like everything is falling apart. Or, at least, gives me something to focus on.

Writing and/or creating characters. I'll admit, sometimes it's hard. ...okay, maybe always it is. But truly, the times when it goes well. Or reading that random thing I wrote years ago because it made me happy.

Cosplaying. Oh where do I begin? I really wish I could indulge in this hobby more often. It just...gives me such a euphoric happiness that it's hard to explain.

Memories. The good ones, that is. I remember all the good times I had on here: the grin that would come to my face for every person who enjoyed my writings or found my incorrect quotes amusing. The time I woke up to nearly 200 notes on an incorrect quote in a 24-hour period (much to my surprise). Scrolling through my dash and finding so much amazing content. Thank you for the memories.

If you happen to see this, consider yourself sent this same message. Spread around the positivity for me. You never know when you need it.

In the meantime, I will be leaving for now. Will I come back? Well, I cannot say one way or the other, but likely not. So if this is the last I'm on here, I just want to say thank you to every single person who ever saw my blog.

Until next time,

-Akeppi

[thepancakeboi]

Goro, trying to kill a bug: “I’m gonna kill you and you’re going to like it.”

Ren, in another room: “Kinky.”

#source: a conversation between me and bestpersonaprotag #p5 #persona 5 #p5r #persona 5 royal #goro akechi #akechi #ren amamiya #akira kurusu #akeshu #shuake #incorrect quotes

[thepancakeboi]

The First Night

ShuAke Week 2021

Day 7: Road Trip / Animals / Nature

On their “road trip” summer vacation / investigate the Jails that have started popping up in this new Metaverse, the newly-reinstated Phantom Thieves have decided to stop for the night. Goro has some contemplating to do about the situation he finds himself in, and one thing plagues his thoughts...

Why did they let me come?

That was the only question on my mind as I sat on the ground, back against the camper behind me. Of all the things I expected to do this summer, going on a road trip with the former...well, reinstated Phantom Thieves would have never been one of my guesses. It was tense. Even so, we were trying to get along, for Ren’s sake. Haru, understandably, didn’t say a word to me since we left that day. Sophia had been persistent in her attempts to have me open up and talk. But I was not going to force any of them to like me.

We had stopped for the night. The girls were sleeping in the camper, and the guys were up in a tent on the roof. I didn’t want to become a problem, so there I was. Sleeping outside on a hot day. Better that than the tent with the guys...and Ren.

Ren. He was the reason they let me come with. That look of disbelief and elation on his face when he realized I was truly alive...they all saw it as clearly as I did. Morgana had told me in secret how Ren had not been himself when he thought I was gone. No wonder he’d been so close to me since that day-

“Is it hot out here, or is it you?”

Speak of the devil. Of course, that teasing voice could only be Ren. I watched as he dropped the pile of blankets and pillows he had been carrying. “What are you doing?” I asked, deciding to ignore his earlier remark for now.

“What do you think?” He started to lay out the blankets, staring at me the entire time. “Figure it out, detective.”

It didn’t take a detective to connect the dots here. He and I both knew that. “Why don’t you sleep with your friends?”

“I wanna be with you,” he replied like it was the most obvious statement in the world.

“Fine. Do what you want. I don’t care.”

He gave a toothy grin, somehow satisfied by my disinterested response. He finished setting up the blankets and laid down, patting the spot next to him. I obliged, silently grateful. We laid there in comfortable silence for a few minutes. And then he slips his hand into mine. For the second time that night, I asked, “What are you doing?”

“Holding your hand.” Again, he said it like it was obvious. Which it was, I suppose. “You don’t wear gloves anymore.”

Truth be told, I had been surprised it took him this long to bring that up. “So?”

At that, Ren pulled something out of his pocket. It was the glove I had ‘given’ him after our duel last November. “I kept it,” he said before I could say anything, “because it’s from you.”

“You sentimental idiot.”

“Thank you.”

“It wasn’t a compliment.”

Ren laughed, shaking his head as he pocketed the glove again. But something about that laugh seemed...hollow. Forced. Did I do something wrong? No, I did. I could tell that much. “Ren-?”

“I’m okay,” he said without prompting, a little too quickly.

I knew what he was thinking. “You’re not going to lose me again.”

“Wha?” he asked with slightly exaggerated confusion. “Where’s this coming from?”

“Don’t play dumb. You’re worried that you’ll wake up and I won’t be around. I’m not leaving. Not now, and not ever.”

Ren didn’t say anything at first. We both were surprised at my words. Several seconds passed before he pulled me into a tight hug. “I won’t let you go,” he mumbled.

I gently wrapped my arms around him, trying to be reassuring with my embrace. “I know. I know... Goodnight, Ren.”

“Goodnight, Akeppi~”

No, I’m not commenting on how we had slept in each other’s arms, cuddling despite the heat. Nor am I going to say anything about how we had enjoyed each other’s company.

But, when I had woken up to him still fast asleep, he had been smiling.

#shuakeweek2021 #akeshu #shuake #p5 strikers #but with goro because ahhh #this idea originally spawned months ago when my sleep-deprived brain thought of it #this is admittedly short but it's been forever and a half since i played strikers #akeppi writes

[thepancakeboi]

Admin: I just realized I spelled “Hiding” earlier as “Hidding”. Oops. ’:D

[thepancakeboi]

I suppose this is where Admin's justice ends.

Fyi I can and have softened people before, sexuality be damned. Doesn't matter if they're gay/lesbian, straight, bi, pan, ace, demi (aka what I headcanon Goro as), and all the other ones that are out there. No character is safe. :)

next person to baby akechi is getting fucking case closed. i am so so so sick of how u people treat gay men. u SOFTEN akechi? you soften him like the butter?

#please take this as me joking #it's just for me you only see me doing it with goro #because that's my blog? #hopefully this doesn't sound passive aggressive ahhh #sorry i will stop here bye bye good night/day/whatever time it may be

[thepancakeboi]

Admin here. Not feeling up to snuff to write anything for today. Real life got...yikes. Tomorrow I hope will bring good things (with writing, at least).

[thepancakeboi]

Hidding True Colours

ShuAke Week 2021

Day 5: Fairytale / Velvet Room / AU

After a harrowing escape from their worst monster yet, Ren and Goro have some time for a reprieve. They’ve saved each other from near-death situations time and time again. Yet Goro has never seen his companion’s face under the paper bag covering his head. Goro decides it’s time to see what Ren is hiding.

Notes: Excerpt from a project of mine combining the plot of Little Nightmares 2 (great game imo) with Ren and Goro as the main characters (Mono and Six, respectively). As such, characterization won’t be quite the same as usual.

Ren grabbed Goro’s outstretched hand by the wrist, gray eyes full of mirth as he asked, “What are you doing?”

You’re still hiding your face under there, Goro thought but didn’t say aloud. He reached for the bag with his other hand, but Ren caught that one too. Goro refused to give up. He kept attempting to grab the bag. His hand touched the paper bag after several seconds. There! At that moment, Ren realized exactly what Goro was trying to do. Ren lurched back. His grip on Goro’s wrists tightened, arms rigid as he kept Goro from removing the paper bag from his head. Ren’s adverse reaction shocked Goro. But that wasn’t what truly confused him. It was Ren’s expression, or what little he could see of the other boy’s face. Ren’s eyes were wide, pupils barely visible as he stared at Goro.

Ren was terrified.

Ren’s voice shook a little as he once again asked, “What are you doing?”

This time, Goro decided he should probably verbally answer that question. “I want to see your face.”

“No,” Ren responded, shaking his head.

“Why not?”

“Because.”

“Because,” Goro repeated with an annoyed sigh. “Because what?”

“Because.”

“Oh, for god’s sake. Just take the damn bag off. You’ve seen my face, so it’s only fair.”

“No, I haven’t! Your face is covered by hair,” Ren retorted, letting go of one of Goro’s arms for a brief moment to twirl a lock of his brown hair. “And you have a hood now!”

“Still more than I’ve seen of yours. All I have seen are your eyes. Do you even have a reason for keeping your face hidden under that paper bag all the time?”

Ren would’ve responded, but the words got caught in his throat. He withdrew from Goro. Why did he hide? He’d never put it into words before, and now that he was being confronted about it by Goro, he wasn’t sure where to begin. Goro patiently waited. Ren was grateful for at least that much. “The world hates me,” he finally murmured.

“The world doesn’t hate just you,” Goro responded, not thinking through his words. “It hates everyone.”

“You’re wrong.” Ren drew his legs toward himself, hugging his knees as he continued. “I keep trying to help people, but no one wants it. Everyone rejects me. And the people I do manage to help...they’ve all died. The world keeps me alive and alone, laughing at my misery. No one cares about me, so why bother showing myself? But I just want to help everyone...”

“Ren...” Goro didn’t know how to respond. So, he said the only thing that came to mind. “You’re not alone. Not anymore. I’m here.”

“You didn’t want my help either.”

“No, I didn’t,” Goro acquiesced, “but I trusted no one. I...I was scared. Every day, I thought it would be my last, but it never was. I had learned to trust only myself. The idea of having to rely on someone else...was abhorrent to me. But you made me realize how foolish that was. The world doesn’t hate you-”

“Yes, it does, just like everyone else-”

“That’s not true! I care about you, damnit!”

They both went silent. All they could do was look at each other, surprised by Goro’s sudden outburst. Ren wasn’t sure he could believe what he was hearing, even with everything they’d been through together. Today should have been more than enough to prove that there was something special between them. Yet, someone...actually cared about him? No, it was too good to be true...right? Ren hesitantly broke the silence as he asked, “Do you...really mean that?”

“Of course, I do,” Goro responded instantly, no longer filtering his words. There was no point in hiding from Ren anymore. They couldn’t keep hiding like this. “I trust you with my life. Don’t you trust me?”

“Yes.”

“Why not show me your face then?”

“No.”

“What? What’s stopping you?”

“It’s just...”

Ren didn’t seem like he was going to finish that thought. It was up to Goro to prompt Ren’s thinking. “You can tell me.”

“Okay, then why the gloves?”

That startled Goro. “Huh?”

“I told you why I hide my face under this,” Ren explained, pointing at the bag still covering his head, “so now it’s your turn. Why do you wear those gloves all the time?”

“...I don’t know.”

That was a lie. Goro knew exactly why he wore them.

He also knew that Ren was seeing right through his excuse. Goro expected Ren to call him out on it, yet the other boy stayed silent. Ren was waiting, patient. Goro fixed his gaze on his hands, eyes boring into the black fabric that covered them. He couldn’t bring himself to look at Ren right now. His voice shook as he said, “I...don’t want to talk about it. But if I...if I show you, will you let me see your face?”

No response.

“Actually, you don’t have to.” Goro steeled himself for what he was about to do next. He could do this. Clutching the glove covering his right hand, he yanked it off before he changed his mind.

Pale, bony hands. Skin marred by scar after scar. Fingers disfigured and joints misaligned.

These were the hands Goro hid from view from everyone, especially himself. He almost expected Ren to scream or freak out. But that didn’t happen. Instead, Ren reached out and grabbed the gloved hand. Goro didn’t resist as Ren pulled it off. His left hand was a similar sight, although it was less disjointed. To his surprise, Ren took Goro’s hand in his, gently caressing his fingers. Shivers ran down Goro’s spine.

Goro decided to try and remove the bag from Ren’s face again. This time, when Goro grabbed it, Ren didn’t flinch. Was Ren...allowing Goro to do this? They stayed still for a couple of seconds, gauging the other’s reaction. Ren...was all right with this. Off went the bag, and what greeted Goro sent his heart racing. Not for a bad reason, far from it. Ren’s black hair was messy and unkempt. It looked soft and fluffy, a fact that Goro quickly confirmed when he ran his hand through it. With the bag gone, those silvery-gray eyes of his were brilliant. A fire burned in those eyes, and now Goro could see one thing clearly:

Ren was beautiful.

#shuakeweek2021 #akeshu #shuake #more like a crossover than an au but that's still au right? #persona 5 x little nightmares 2 #akeppi writes

[thepancakeboi]

Admin: Today is day 4 of Shuake Week 2021 and it’s “free day”. So I’m taking that to do...nothing. It’s a free day and I’m taking it to relax while I figure out what the next few days will bring. Especially when day 5 includes “AU” and I’m here like “which one?”

[thepancakeboi]

Gloved Elegy

I’ve never seen you cry except for me Sometimes I wonder why you even care For someone like me, heart black and ugly

Do you just show your love, emotions bare? Is it because I haunt your every thought? Or is it pity from how life’s unfair?

Why’d you even keep it, that glove you got? It causes pain and grief. What do you do When even seeing it makes you distraught?

All these hidden meanings that you construe For a rival, a friend, an enemy Empty, meaningless words that leave you blue

Alive and with you I will never be And grief for a glove is all you will see

7/28. Day 3: Glove / Grief / Dreams

#shuakeweek2021 #akeshu #shuake #akeppi writes #poetry #the potential angst is so strong with this day's prompts #angst is fun lol #listen if you get hurt by my angsty stuff i felt it just as much (if not more so) than you

[thepancakeboi]

Admin: I-I didn’t know how much I needed to hear that until now. From the bottom of whatever heart exists in this cage of bones: thank you.

Admin: Okay so like Shuake Week started today and I...legitimately don't have the mental motivation to write oneshots like I normally would.

So instead my beautiful dumbass brain said "hey you like writing poetry do that". And here I am now, doing that.

[thepancakeboi]

Fateful Love

Fate has always been fickle as can be It left my life in such a disarray But fate is more than sorrow and dismay Because fate is what brought you, my beauty Somehow despite everything you love me Even with all my misdeeds on display There to guide me back when I’ve gone astray You are my world, the only one I see

But if we would have met as children I think we could have been great together If only I hadn’t drowned in my sin Can we still be friends, rivals, something more? Because you make me light as a feather And release my love for you deep within

7/27. Day 2: Childhood / Family / Fate

#shuakeweek2021 #akeshu #shuake #akeppi writes #poetry #i am posting this less than 10 minutes before the day changes what a time

[thepancakeboi]

Opposing Similarities

When we first met that fateful day in June

I was intrigued by fire in your eyes

Perhaps we could talk again sometime soon?

You quickly agreed, much to my surprise

It’s true when they say opposites attract

Yet we are more alike than we realize

Stubborn and hate to lose, that’s simply fact

Both seeking to destroy this web of lies

Two sides of one coin, “rivals forever”

You’re the thesis to my antithesis

The bond between us I hate to sever

But I cannot afford to reminisce

Into the depths of hell your soul descends

Checkmate, Ren. This is where your justice ends.

7/26. Day 1: Chess / Status effect / Two sides, same coin

#shuakeweek2021 #how do I tag this lol I don’t normally post poetry #akeshu #shuake #akeppi writes #poetry #also I know I made that the last line #yes I am horrible #no I do not care #fight me lol

[thepancakeboi]

Admin: Okay so like Shuake Week started today and I...legitimately don't have the mental motivation to write oneshots like I normally would.

So instead my beautiful dumbass brain said "hey you like writing poetry do that". And here I am now, doing that.

#i am sorry that i can't get myself to write the oneshots #every time i go to try it just doesn't come out #maybe writer's block? maybe depression? who knows lol

[thepancakeboi]

Admin: Shuake Week 2021 is 5 days away and I have as much of an idea of what I’m doing for it as I did three months ago. Aka...none at all-

#how does one write #ahhhhhhhhhhh

[thepancakeboi]

Admin: Are you saying this didn't happen?

What SHOULD'VE happened during the aquarium date

[thepancakeboi]

Admin: Truth be told, I probably wouldn't have known Makoto was older than Goro if I hadn't had a day where I wanted to see how many of the Phantom Thieves would be older/younger than me (older than Ann by 3 days lol). Otherwise, I would've just thought "they're around the same age since they're 3rd years".

why do so many people seem to forget that Makoto is older than Akechi

also why do people seem to think being 18 in Japan makes you an adult. Japan has different laws guys. Legal adult age over there is 20. They did recently pass the law to bring it down to 18, but that doesn’t go into effect until 2022; so in 2016 (when p5 takes place) both Makoto and Akechi are legally still minors.

[thepancakeboi]

Admin: I hate to be the bearer of bad news but the giveaway was a month ago and preorders ended two days ago (I should know, since I preordered...three hours before they ended-)

But yes. This’ll be neat to be getting (and I loved that post)

🌟 GIVEAWAY 🌟

We hit 1000 sales! As thanks, SHOWTIME is hosting a giveaway from 6/14 to 6/16. One winner across all of our accounts will receive Bundle #4 for free!

RULES

You must be following the account.

1 entry per person.

Tag at least one other user in the replies!

* Purchasers of SHOWTIME are allowed to partake in this giveaway. The winner’s bundle will be updated to the highest tier and made free. * The winner must respond within 24 hours in order to claim their prize.