thevoiddemandscookies

[thevoiddemandscookies]

Thinking about that group of friends that sat behind us at Smackdown last month. I made a sign for the show and they loved it. It was just a piece of printer paper that had a large “2” on it in sharpie. I held it up every time the referee only counted to 2 on a pin.

I hope they’re all doing good.

#wwe smackdown #I hope they know I think about them #i hope they’re doing well #2

[thevoiddemandscookies]

Logistically it makes sense for recent Pokemon games to make the Pokedex a phone app instead of needing to carry around a whole second device. But that's also boring. Bring back my boy.

[thevoiddemandscookies]

Reminds me of learning that the Arch in St. Louis, MO moves something like 18 inches in strong winds. Can you imagine being up there and suddenly you’re moving 1 foot to the left. No thank you

i don't like the fact that the eiffel tower can stretch. i don't like that

[thevoiddemandscookies]

adhd? nah babe, I have ad4K 1080p Widescreen

[thevoiddemandscookies]

Are you the “I have 3 drinks cause I need my water, caffeine, and fun drink” kind of ADHD

or are you the “I’m thirsty I should get some water”*three hours later* “why is my mouth so dry? Oh yeah I need get some water” kind of ADHD

#adhd #help I’m always thirsty #why am I like this #I remember to drink 1 (one) glass of water a day if I’m lucky

[thevoiddemandscookies]

Something good this week?

Hmm this week has been pretty rough mentally for me. My s/o and I decided to go out with some old coworkers/friends for Saturday brunch and later for drinks and dancing. We go to brunch (which was pretty good) and head home for a nap.

My s/o started to not feel good. He offers to drop me off so I can still hang out with my coworkers and says he might come out later if he feels better. He falls asleep on the couch so I put on a movie for me to watch. I pick Pride and Prejudice (2005) because I love it. I don’t get to finish it before I leave. An hour or so after I get dropped off by my s/o, he messages me that he finished and then restarted the movie and that he thinks Lizzie’s dad really is the best dad. I’m in this very loud gay bar, bass from the music thumping all of my organs around, and I smile at his message. I think to myself: I really married the right man. He later tells me that if I hadn’t brought it to him a few years ago to watch, he never would have seen it, and that he really likes it. He even said it’s like when he brought The Importance of Being Earnest (1952) for me to watch and how I feel in love with it. (It is so good, btw. Please find a way to watch the 1952 version. I bought it on dvd because I had to have a way to watch it whenever I wanted. I haven’t bought a movie since 2010. Everyone is invited over to watch it).

Ugh idk I just love him and he loves me and sometimes I get caught up in my own head and he gets busy with work and his own stuff and then we share something like this and it brings me back down. You’d think after 15 years of being in a relationship, we’d have run out of new things to learn about each other, but we do it all the time.

Sorry about the long reply. I’d really like to know what the last thing you baked was and if it was tasty? I’m craving cookies.

hey chat

#long post #one good thing this week #fish #cookies

[thevoiddemandscookies]

Went to my local art museum recently and in every section I went to (ancient Americas, African, Asian, European, etc) I saw something that made me think “people really just like decorating things”. A little tea set with leaves painted on it. A plate with a horse. A water vessel with little people. A jewelry box decorated with animals. Across all of these cultures, we all decorated the little things in our lives. I thought about my water bottle at home covered in stickers. Even I like to decorate my water vessel.

thinking about all the “small” art that’s ever existed. songs that were only ever sung in one village. stories written by children that got lost in the shuffle. personal paintings that didn’t survive the test of time. how they affected the lives of just a few, but still existed, still mattered to someone.

#art #humans have always been the same #thinking about the cave paintings teaching the children how to paint

[thevoiddemandscookies]

A long time friend of mine messaged me today. We speak frequently, so I was not surprised to see his name pop up on my phone. He says:

“Have I ever told you that every time I butter toast, I think of you”.

He recalls a time from more than 10 years ago where I was making breakfast for our group of friends and I offered to butter his toast for him. He says he liked the way I did it and tries to do it that same way.

It was so sweet. I don’t recall this happening at all. I don’t even think I butter my toast any particular way, but it’s so endearing that we remember moments like this. We really do love the people around us in such small ways that we don’t even realize it.

We live half a country apart from each other. We’ve seen each other only once in person since 2019. Yet every time he butters some toast, I’m there with him in his kitchen, sharing a moment over and over again. And I don’t even realize it.

#I truly love my friends #they truly love me too #long time friendship #buttered toast

[thevoiddemandscookies]

Goodbye, Earth

You have been abducted by a UFO. After you slowly regained your senses, you thought that the alien would dissect, torture or experiment on you, instead they are talking about saving you and others from that oppressive and hellish planet called Earth.

#personally I accept our new alien saviors #take me away

[thevoiddemandscookies]

Welcome to the Void, darlings.

Box of Space⭐✨🌟

I would bring the whole box home, consequences be damned.

[thevoiddemandscookies]

reblog to make ur blog smell like crispy autumn air, graveyards, carved pumpkin guts, moon water, and a damp cave full of bats 

[thevoiddemandscookies]

I dreamt last night that I went back in time to 2015. I was at a Trump rally. He was standing up at a podium in a meeting hall and said:

“We won’t stand for this consruption!”

The crowd cheered and I thought, what did he say??? Consruption?? He’s making that shit up. So I raised my hand and jumped around excitedly, trying hard not to laugh, like I was in school and yelled “Mr. Trump, Mr. Trump! Over here!”

He pointed to me and I scream/laughed: “WHAT THE FUCK IS CONSRUPTIONNNN?!!??!” I couldn’t keep the laughter in anymore. I was falling down laughing.

The crowd chased me out of the meeting room and I starting saying between gasps of laughter “no please wait I’m going to pee my pants!” I woke up laughing and I had to pee sooo bad I really did almost pee my pants.

#one time i dreamt #dreams #someone give me a time machine I’ll do it for real #don’t let my dreams be dreams

[thevoiddemandscookies]

It’s 10:30 am on a Monday. I have no job. I’m in debt. I sit in my dark kitchen. The sink is full of dirty dishes. My countertops are pilled with the remnants of dinner three nights ago. My garbage can is overflowing. The kitchen table has a half finished puzzle I haven’t touched in a month. I stare out the window.

This is my depression kitchen. It’s full of all of my anxiety and fears and feelings I avoid. The sight of it causes me to clench my jaw, makes me run through all my negative self-talk like a tape on fast forward. You’re not good enough-Why can’t you keep a clean kitchen-You don’t even work so you have all the time in the world-You’re a failure-No one could love you like this-

I sigh, try to calm my mind, try to keep from breaking down. I glance in the living room where my husband is hard at work. My cat wanders in and rubs against my leg. “Mmrrmp?” he says, looking up at me. I smile and pat his little head. If I can’t break my depression cycle because I can’t love myself, I can break it because I love them. And they love me. And for now, that’s enough.

#depression #mental illness #my negative self-talk sure is rude #I’m trying

[thevoiddemandscookies]

To the young woman who stopped to ask me about my band t-shirt at Michaels,

I apologize for not know how to talk to people. You were so sweet and friendly. I grew up being suspicious of strangers talking to me. I was working on it and had gotten better. The pandemic made me only socialize with my coworkers/classmates and undid my work over the last two years.

I hope you check out Space of Variations. Maybe I’ll see you at some local music shows.

Until next time,

The Void

#dear stranger #socially awkward #space of variations