thisisadonaldduckblognow

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

I've reblogged my moots' posts, but i want to say it for myself as well

I don't care what you make, I don't care what you support, as long as you tag your stuff properly, I have no problem with you

This goes for Tcest, April x Turtle, NSFW - if you create or engage in this content, you're welcome here as long as you don't force it onto me, which despite what a lot of people complain about, is not a problem I've run into

They're fictional characters, I just wanna have fun with my silly little turtles, and if you wanna have fun with these silly little turtles with me, you're welcome here

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

i don't care for the whole ~shovel talk~ thing in GENERAL bc it doesn't always vibe for me but sometimes i do like it in my fiction if it feels right and anyway what i'm here to say is

100% full belief in my heart i can feel it i know it, if the fam does shovel talks then in a surprise sweep, it's any s/o raph brings home who gets the worst ones LMFAO

#rottmnt #rise raph #rottmnt raph #i speak the truth and i know it #little brother and april squads strategy meeting like oh we're gonna defend him SO good he's SENSITIVE HE DESERVES ONLY THE BEST

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

i for one would like to know where this "family therapist bearing everyone's feelings" mikey fanon even comes from

to say nothing for "raph and leo were having constant terrible arguments and poor baby mikey was so upset and traumatized about it that he curled up hidden away in donnie's lab where donnie comforted him, powerless to do anything about the fighting" bc like

well the family therapist thing fascinates me but i think i've talked about that and why it doesn't read true to me before.

and the pre-movie raph and leo fighting so bad headcanon stuff, though, bugs me doubly hard bc i would assume that start of movie is like. as bad as it got for that tension. the breaking point. like, lecturing and needling that didn't come to a full head (raph punching out leo's wall and then trying to square up w leo) until leo specifically messed up a mission that involved the foot clan (which i would imagine is kind of a trigger point seeing as the last result of "foot clan gathers mysterious artifacts" was "the world almost ends, we lost our home, gram gram died in front of us, we nearly lost our dad etc").

like. mikey was fine as anything blowing off training w leo! he was having a grand ol time, doing his best lil bro copycatting of leo's smugness, playing the "every time raph says hero take a bite of pizza" game no complaints, no looks of doubt. heck, donnie's fine going along with the goofing off too! when raph follows leo into his room to try to talk to him, mikey and donnie both straight-up have their faces pressed to the window to try to eavesdrop! they both look equally freaked out about the sudden escalation to Big Punch!

like idk the evidence is just not there for me to buy the fanon interpretation on this one. there's no world where mikey and donnie wouldn't get fed tf up and stick their noses in that business if it was so upsetting imo. i think everyone's movie characterization suffers a little bit overall tho tbh, that's a whole other post though

#rottmnt #rottmnt movie #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt mikey #idk man there's just. #a character being more emotionally open than his fam doesnt automatically make him the family therapist #esp when a lot of what we do get of the dynamics in show makes it pretty clear mikey is 100% The Baby and sheltered #like it kind of grates on him even esp coming from raph! bc he WANTS to be seen as on more even ground etc

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

idg people using crowley's "i think i understand a whole lot better than you do" as like. legit. like just taking at his word that of course he knows better about heaven and what it's like than aziraphale, who's actually had to be part of and work for heaven for the past thousands of years and who knew even before the rebellion that it was dangerous to ask a lot of questions

like idk it's very dismissive and kind of condescending to me, it's hard to explain

their experiences with heaven and how heaven treats them are fundamentally different. a large part of that is based directly around the fact that crowley was cast out and aziraphale remained part of that system

and this isn't me hating on crowley, this isn't me sweeping his trauma under the rug, he was right to say no and put his foot down about going back. but like. it's this pervading idea that somehow despite his pre-rebellion anxiety and thousands of years of manipulation and abuse from heaven, aziraphale simply ~doesn't know better~

the entire argument is so much more complicated than one of them being totally right and the other one being totally wrong

#good omens #good omens 2

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

where was splinter during the pizza puffs episode though fr

raph is in the main living area of the lair yelling at the top of his lungs about how his brothers just ate mystic poison and then yelling about how he’s trying to teach them responsibility for their own problems bc they always expect him to do it for them and meanwhile their whole entire dad is not present LMAO

#rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #im mostly joking like i know lots of eps are solely about the boys and april its just #man not even a throwaway line for splinter's absence raph's having a whole mental break about this sir please

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

bangs pots and pans

raph was never any less suited to leadership than leo

raph was never any less suited to leadership than leo

raph was N E V E R any less suited to leadership than leo

idk how many times i can say it before it sinks in that in rise there was never once any point where that was the point being made

if you just like leo’s character better than you like raph’s, that’s fine! if you just like it better when leo is leader, that’s fine! i have no issue!

but we need to stop trying to circle that leadership change back to somehow being about better or worse or ~more cut out for it~ because it sucks to throw the great job raph did through the series under the bus in order to prop up leo’s good qualities. 

they’re both great leaders. they both have strong suits and weak suits in the role, they both have growth and development when they’re in that role. they BOTH make on-screen mistakes in that role and aren’t very good at it at first! not getting a more in-depth explanation about it in the movie or series stinks and it’s very interesting to explore, but seriously. 

#rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt raph #rise raph #like it's so...... #all of raph's growth as a leader and hard work at it was up and down about him growing as a leader #learning and adapting and incorporating things #when raph messes up the point is NEVER 'ohoho see he's just not as good at it or fit for it' #it's ALWAYS him learning something that he does better with next time #and in that vein leo showing those leadership qualities and potential! #is NEVER about 'oh he would be so much better at it than raph' #it's just about leo having that potential and that talent that went unnoticed! #and like. idk what to tell you leo was doing a not great job at start of movie like raph was doing start of series #if the point was always 'raph cant hack it leo was REALLY meant for this all along' then mayhaps... #one of the emotional high points and climaxes of the finale would not have been raph learning one more important lesson #and the team then fully unlocking the ninpo and rising to their potential #it probably would have been a finale arc about leo stepping up specifically in some way #and all this of course i say having put aside that leadership was never meant to be a big deal in rise anyway.... #pitting 2 bad bitches against each other like this for no reason like they're not both fantastic

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

i feel away about the fact that when the boys all get in trouble raph is the one who always says the apology to splinter about it 😭

off the top of my head i’ve got in ‘evil league of mutants’ when they get caught sneaking back into the lair, he’s the one with the “we’re sorry we snuck out but we learned a real important lesson”

‘insane in the mama train’ raph leads on the “we’re sorry please train us we’ll do better” 

annnnnnd ‘endgame’ he’s the one who apologizes to splinter about them not being able to do things the traditional hamato way

responsibility-taking level: 100

#rottmnt #rottmnt raph #rise raph #rise of the tmnt

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

i am going to stand on my Raph Is The Sun soapbox forever ftr. not that anyone has said not to.

i don’t mean that in an “everything and everyone revolves around raph all the time, bc he’s the most important one of them all” way. bc i’ll reiterate forever that there is no one member of this family who is the Most Important or most special, there is no member of this family who would be the most or least devastating to lose. like. if the hamatos lose anyone they’re never fully recovering.

i do mean what i say in the general sense of raph being a source of warmth and support, and in the sense that he does a lot of holding everyone together.

but more than anything when i say raph is the sun and his family is his solar system i mean like

raph isn’t the sun bc he’s the most important one that everyone revolves around, he’s the sun bc without a planetary system, a sun isn’t a sun. and i think so much of raph’s sense of personal identity and purpose is wrapped up in the roles he serves for his family so like. it just all checks out

#rottmnt raph #rise raph #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt #i wanted to talk about raph and how he picks things up that he sees as needing picked up but no one else is willing to take #substitute parenting; leadership; teambuilding; being a protector #that moment in the movie when casey says then it's too late and everyone is looking crestfallen #and raph looks around at them; and he finds the strength to be the one who says no it's not. it's not too late we can still do it. #like. it is so important #and the contrast to leo who is the other turtle with the motivational speech history #coleaders tbh but like. raph CHOOSING it over and over again choosing to step up choosing to carry hammering raw tenacity into hope #he is not a natural with words he is not eloquent but he puts so much into everything #they need hope they need motivation no one else is doing it so raph will do it for them #meanwhile leo the 'face man' who can whip up on the fly motivation with flair and charisma leo who is better at long game strategy #like for raph it's a choice for leo it's an epiphany #and the important thing is that they both get the job done that they're trying to do; they rally their family they push on #no one: me: makes a second post in the tags of a post for some reason #anyway anyone who says there's a better leader one or the other between leo and raph is a fool and a coward #theyre equally good and likewise equally both flawed and they both care a lot about their family

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

obsessed w this whole shot btw it captures SO much

raph highlighted by the sun, at the center of the scene and the other characters’ focus even without being center-frame (they are looking towards the sun, who brings safety and warmth; raph is facing towards his entire solar system, what he exists to protect

and i think about that metaphor a lot especially since when raph falls back, they all follow after him immediately, like he’s a center of gravity)

the wide and very noticeable gap between him and his brothers, who are all grouped closely together on their end, like a reflection of the distance in their relationships and viewpoints, a gap raph is understanding only exists because he kept it there.

the throughline of the boards they’re standing on!! like one very long beam they’re all standing on, raph alone on his end of it trying to carry enough weight to balance the rest of them out, but also one very long beam they’re all standing on at the same level, balancing out. (and april/karai at the center as the resting point, as the fulcrum of this realization and what comes next, the driving force for this breakthrough)

it’s maddening i am not normal about this.

#rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt raph #rise raph #rottmnt raphael #rise raphael #no one understands the impact this episode has on me emotionally i am fraught rn #it's so gorgeous and so good UGH

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

all the rise boys get done dirty on characterization by fandom in different ways i think. (not ALL the time every fanwork etc etc these are just like, trends i tend to notice?) every fandom suffers from losing character nuance.

- leo i’ve talked about plenty on this blog, how some of his canon traits (genuine belief in his skill and cockiness, capacity for joy, his manipulativeness whether for good or ill) seem to get watered down or wiped off the board and supplemented with generic sad boy. his struggles with purpose and identity and not wanting to fail somehow morph into “he hates and completely holds no value for himself”

- donnie’s canon personality gets blurred out and largely replaced with whatever list of Neurodivergent Traits. and i think there’s such a fine line to walk between exploring a character that’s been word of god confirmed as on the spectrum and overwriting what’s canonically there. it’s a hard needle to thread. it also feels like a lot of his canon emotiveness gets left off the table for some reason. bc he does have his moments of flat/deadpan delivery, but a lot of the time he’s honestly very emotive. he has the passion of a theatre kid and the vindictiveness of… also a theatre kid. and the mind of a scientist.

- raph loses so much of his rowdy teen boy energy it’s kind of wild? like interpretations sand off that he’s also impulsive and can be reckless and dumb and LOVES fighting and roughhousing and isn’t the most eloquent person. suddenly there’s this pitch perfect soft boy big bro who would never hurt a fly and always says the exact right supportive thing and singlehandedly raised his 3 brothers (which simultaneously sands off all the nuance of splinter’s issues emotionally connecting with his sons and how that affected all of them). and like i LOVE raph, he’s so full of love and care and anxiety, he clearly has learned to put a lot of work into being aware of his strength and size. but there’s a difference you know?

- mikey is like. where raph gets overparentified by fanon, mikey gets over “family therapist”-ed IMO. the impulsiveness, the goofiness, the powerful emotions including a VERY powerful temper, the flat-out dumb teen boy choices… they get ignored. suddenly there’s this only very sweet and earnest boy who has read a hundred psychology books and runs group family therapy weekly or something. he is crying in his room bc leo and raph are arguing about something. which is so. he IS very sweet and can be very earnest and is full of love! he HAS come in with his opinions and unsolicited advice a couple of times and life coached for the greater good. but there’s a difference between what he does in canon and the role he gets in fanon.

#rottmnt #long post #relob #EXCELLENT ADDITION april deserves her meta flowers

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

i wish i had the energy and eloquence to fully and properly get into the family therapist mikey thing tbh it’s so hard to just. explain what i MEAN. 

(ftr i am an adult who does regularly touch grass. i understand interpretation and ymmv on characterization. i understand the catharsis of vent art and vent fic and projecting issues onto characters to process them. i don’t read through stuff i’ve found issues with and then seethe about it, i keep scrolling or hit the back button and find something else. 

i am still gonna talk about trends i’ve noticed and things that i don’t get or that rub me the wrong way. please don’t come into my posts about my personal thoughts and opinions to, however well-meaning or politely, judge me for expressing them. consider doing what i do and keep scrolling. i won’t engage with that. i would ask that no one else engages with that in replies or comments.

i also legit don’t Get tone indicators just ftr. they elude me.)

bc so much of the draxum moral realignment stuff was mikey being motivated largely by what mikey wanted. he wanted to see barry as family, he wanted barry to become part of the family, he wanted the story of their mutation to be less uh. objectively crummy.

now, mikey’s wants in that area served as a CATALYST for other development, him pursuing that (often very hamfistedly and despite many objections) wound up paving the way, but it was ultimately in the spirit of his personal desire. which ftr im not criticizing that’s very much part of the character.

he brought draxum to the big hidden city day out because it was a Family Event and he personally considered draxum family. splinter and draxum kinda coming to a truce, splinter reconciling that his mutation (despite the horrific trauma and long-lasting impact of it) was still what gave him his sons who he loves more than anything, that was all splinter and draxum. mikey’s action of bringing barry along was a catalyst, he was able to speak to his own feelings about it to splinter when it came up, but he wasn’t sitting there going “tell me how that makes you feel and we’ll talk through it” yknow?

and it’s the same with the dr feelings thing with donnie, which is arguably as close to Playing Therapist as mikey gets on screen. bc that was just a very Extra way of confronting donnie about the shelldon stuff. like. that was mikey inserting himself into the situation so he could give his personal opinion about how donnie was messing up, just with a sweater and a powerpoint. like. an intervention i guess. if donnie hadn’t gotten the picture from the slides he was probably all lined up for a dr delicate touch meeting.

which like, was also not being donnie’s therapist as much as a once again very hamfisted way of addressing something that mikey felt in the right about?

i’m wondering if maybe what i picture when i hear about a child having to play therapist for the family isn’t the same as what modern fandom means by saying it. because i picture like, what steven universe went through. which was practically singlehandedly, as a child, walk a bunch of adults through their own grief and insecurities and shortcomings with unending patience and support, to a point of pushing all his own needs and emotional issues aside.

where steven seemed convinced there were things that he wasn’t allowed to express or outright things he never got to learn to express, mikey is probably the most emotionally open and honest of all the brothers. he feels more outright sheltered. 

especially where his big brothers are concerned. the entire episode about his first solo mission he was chafing about being unnecessarily overprotected by raph. there’s a lot tied up in his relationship to raph if we take what the creators said about them growing apart as they’ve grown up into account. 

so i guess for me, in my understanding of the trauma of playing therapist at a young age, i can’t really reconcile what canon gives us with the idea of any of the other brothers or splinter (who is notably emotionally disconnected from his sons at series start) genuinely dropping their issues on his lap. 

but in that vein, for as much as he’s emotionally open and honest, i’m sure there are also insecurities and issues that mikey doesn’t express. or. that canon for some reason just decided to not dig into in any of the episodes that actually got made.

but ohhhhh that’s a whole separate can of worms.

#rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt mikey #rise mikey

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

all the rise boys get done dirty on characterization by fandom in different ways i think. (not ALL the time every fanwork etc etc these are just like, trends i tend to notice?) every fandom suffers from losing character nuance.

- leo i’ve talked about plenty on this blog, how some of his canon traits (genuine belief in his skill and cockiness, capacity for joy, his manipulativeness whether for good or ill) seem to get watered down or wiped off the board and supplemented with generic sad boy. his struggles with purpose and identity and not wanting to fail somehow morph into “he hates and completely holds no value for himself”

- donnie’s canon personality gets blurred out and largely replaced with whatever list of Neurodivergent Traits. and i think there’s such a fine line to walk between exploring a character that’s been word of god confirmed as on the spectrum and overwriting what’s canonically there. it’s a hard needle to thread. it also feels like a lot of his canon emotiveness gets left off the table for some reason. bc he does have his moments of flat/deadpan delivery, but a lot of the time he’s honestly very emotive. he has the passion of a theatre kid and the vindictiveness of... also a theatre kid. and the mind of a scientist.

- raph loses so much of his rowdy teen boy energy it’s kind of wild? like interpretations sand off that he’s also impulsive and can be reckless and dumb and LOVES fighting and roughhousing and isn’t the most eloquent person. suddenly there’s this pitch perfect soft boy big bro who would never hurt a fly and always says the exact right supportive thing and singlehandedly raised his 3 brothers (which simultaneously sands off all the nuance of splinter’s issues emotionally connecting with his sons and how that affected all of them). and like i LOVE raph, he’s so full of love and care and anxiety, he clearly has learned to put a lot of work into being aware of his strength and size. but there’s a difference you know?

- mikey is like. where raph gets overparentified by fanon, mikey gets over “family therapist”-ed IMO. the impulsiveness, the goofiness, the powerful emotions including a VERY powerful temper, the flat-out dumb teen boy choices... they get ignored. suddenly there’s this only very sweet and earnest boy who has read a hundred psychology books and runs group family therapy weekly or something. he is crying in his room bc leo and raph are arguing about something. which is so. he IS very sweet and can be very earnest and is full of love! he HAS come in with his opinions and unsolicited advice a couple of times and life coached for the greater good. but there’s a difference between what he does in canon and the role he gets in fanon.

#rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #idk this is not a very eloquent rundown its very hard to explain exactly my vibe #ig the long story short is i feel like a lot of their most interesting and fun qualities get left in the dust #mikey as family therapist is getting under my skin the most rn i think its just so. #for as much as it seems like his brothers try to shelter him (esp raph with his overprotectiveness)..... i just dont see it #i dont see his brothers and definitely not his dad putting their issues on him like that... #him dragging donnie into that one dr feelings session and dragging draxum into a new moral alignment were different #than 'yeah everyone tells mikey their stuff and he has to do the labor of helping with it' #like it just doesnt vibe for me #i think he is very emotionally OPEN on all levels compared to his family #i think he is more likely to share when HE struggles #i dont think raph or leo is sitting with him at 3am like 'it all started when i was 4 and accidentally broke a plate' or what have you idk #it's all so ymmv i do just scroll past stuff i dont vibe with i dont drop hate on it i just #idk dudes its so hard to see the appeal in some of the choices made

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

ik it’s probably a classic case of extrapolating way too much but... the way raph’s character design lines up w his whole arc and role and struggles...

like the fact that he is so so so much bigger than the others. raph is big, raph is strong, raph is steady and sturdy and he can literally pick up his entire family and carry them all at once. 

and like, when raph is so big and so strong and such a reliable thing. when raph is the protector, the one calling the shots on missions, the mother hen, the first point of authority. when raph is there, overprotective, when raph (for all that his brothers poke at him not being good under pressure) always always ALWAYS comes through at the end of the day when things are serious, ALWAYS gives it everything he’s got. 

his design and his learned role/behaviors in this family are just the perfect storm of why it took up to the season finale to drive home the issue.

so much of the series carries the default energy of “raph will handle it.”

raph will hold up the ceiling above you. raph will throw himself over you and take a hit and get back up and keep fighting. raph has a power that makes him even bigger and draws more attention and makes him able to carry MORE. raph will be the substitute parent. raph will be put into the mentor role through leo’s leadership arc. 

and raph is big. he’s built to carry heavy loads. raph is strong. raph is bold and loud and always ready to try to push on. even if he doesn’t know what to do or what he’s doing, he won’t give up and we’ll all pull together and things will turn out okay.

(his room is full of teddy bears. he dipped out on a mission to try to take a picture of a pigeon carrying a slice of pizza. he’s terrified of being alone.

he’s just as much of a kid as his brothers are. he’s just as new and inexperienced with the things happening to them as his brothers are. but for him, for some reason, there’s like this double standard where that becomes a huge glaring flaw.)

idk this got very sloppy and uncoordinated. i’m very in my feelings about raph right now though.

#rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt raph #rise raph #rottmnt raphael #honestly i could go on forever and ever about the double standard thing where raph is concerned #like. w movie leo especially leo is learning lessons raph also had to learn in the series! making very similar mistakes! #but you never see analyses or essays pointing to those bad calls as signs that leo isn't up to the task... #(i mean there are some clear Reasons why that happens.) #(its the reason why raph and mikey are the bros who get the least content by a MILE. but. not the point of this post.) #the whole point is just the idle subconscious assumption and associations of it being fine to let raph carry everything #literally physically sure but also metaphorically #and the plight of the child who seems to Need Nothing (all children need; some sadly learn not to appear to need) #even my tags are incoherent rn clenches fists i love him so much is all #like there is a reason it takes to the series finale for him to have a proper breakdown and get actual support from his bros #and i am still mad we never got real good content for him and splinter #considering how similar their arcs ARE.... #thats a whole other thing whatever

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

me thinking about the moment in the movie where leo is fighting krangified raph and he is feeling so much pressure and so much stress and guilt and he is so so scared for his family and for raph especially because he just wants to get raph out safely, he just wants his brother with him and their family unharmed and in one piece, but he can’t get through why won’t raph HEAR him why isn’t raph LISTENING he just wants to SAVE HIM why is he making things SO HARD--

and that is the moment where it finally fully clicks for leo, after all this, where raph was coming from at the start of the movie. that it wasn’t about being stubborn or wanting to call all the shots and be the boss, it wasn’t pettiness or raph being hard on them for no reason. it was always just raph wanting them to be safe, and getting scared and frustrated when doing that was difficult. or when, perhaps, certain stinker lil brothers seemed to be going out of their way to make it difficult.

like he really has that hard stop moment of realization while he’s looking directly at raph... at his own reflection u could say... love that

#rottmnt #rottmnt leo #rottmnt raph #rise raph #rise leo #rise of the tmnt #ive seen the interpretation that leo yelling about raph making things so hard is also him sharing his own POV about their dynamic lately? #and i dig that too! #another notch in the ways that honestly they are very similar in motivation tbh #the OH moment! #OH this is why it's been so tense OH this is why raph has been so hardline and irritated when i fly off solo #like after raph was captured leo spent a lot of time kinda bullheadedly larping what he thought raph would do? #bc leo was angry (bc leo was feeling guilty and absolutely terrified) #all the way up to the roof scene where he finally learned his listen to the team lesson (a lesson raph also had to learn in the series) #like it was such a genuine misunderstanding and miscommunication leo is over here doing his best raph but what he THOUGHT raph was doing #and like raph is a great leader while raph is leader! does very well learns and grows ive gone on about that before but #like for all their similarities they are still different people with different strengths so the double whammy of trying to do a raph AND #sincerely not GETTING where raph had been coming from #was a recipe for disaster #and like leo's leadership strengths come through more after the roof scene but this scene is about his relationship to raph #this little moment where he stops himself and has this what am i DOING moment has this no wait i finally GET IT moment #like that's just all i can see when i see that scene; the final breakthrough for leo that makes him able to reach for raph properly #bc he WAS just fighting him before that; and maybe in raphs zombie mind hell that carried over idk

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

i want it known and i say this in full sincerity

u could make the best point about something rise-related in the world in a post. u could say something very interesting and funny and cool.

but if at any point u try to draw a line from a thing to the conclusion “raph is/was not fit to be leader” im gonna disregard everything else about that post, bc there is a base level fundamental misunderstanding there

#rottmnt raph #rottmnt #like...... he was not any more OR less suited to it than any of the bros would be.... tbh #and he ultimately did a genuinely VERY good job #we watched him learn and grow and improve and always try his best! #with the primary motive of keeping his brothers safe! #like idgi people love to say that and then make a point about XYZ qualities in leo that make him Really More Suited or whatever but #does leo not uhhh #not spend whatever timeskip between the series and movie not being a very good leader #does he not spend most of the movie not being very good at it and have to learn and grow and improve? #like just bc they both have different strengths and weaknesses AS leaders doesnt mean one is better or worse than the other #its so so so so not a competition like in rise so much of the POINT is the lack of contention about this EXACT thing #you can like leo as a leader and his good qualities without trying to sell that raph wasn't amazing too

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

thinking about this again after rewatching the ep and have decided its yet another notch in the “raph is the heart of the team” belt tbh. 

i mean anytime you have sunset duo together it’s a hearts-first mission lbr

super funny to me that it only took mikey 2 sentences to win raph over on giving draxum a second chance before draxum had even done anything like. decent.

mikey: (volunteers raph for night out on his draxum rehabilitation initiative)

raph: WHAT NO WHY ME

also raph: (still goes, defends draxum’s life in full earnestness solely bc mikey cares so much about this, helps pick him out a job)

[thisisadonaldduckblognow]

yes a thousand percent absolutely lets go

(firstly i am sorry my post put anyone to a point of feeling the need to apologize for or feel bad for being Very Into Leo’s character. as someone who is flagrantly Very Into Raph’s character, i promise i wasn’t trying to throw a stone in this glass house. i’ve gotten burnt out on a lot of fanon leo stuff but part of why im so !!!! about it is bc i too love leo’s characterization and potential.. i swear

catch me catching my brain and tone malfunctions behind dennys later, sorry again gang)

BUT YE I’LL TALK ABOUT MOVIE RAPH STUFF TO MY BEST CAPACITY ALL DAY

overall i honestly... totally get raph being hard to get a handle on in this respect. like it’s pretty difficult to pick where to start and how to express it even just in an informal tumblr analysis post, i still haven’t managed to put together any kind of fic myself LMAO. bear with me i will do my best!

so firstly there’s just the veritable gauntlet of “stuff raph experienced/was dealing with in the span of the movie” to consider, i think. 

- his fear and anxiety over his family’s safety, for which he always always feels personally responsible. when he called the retreat during that first fight with the krang, he was absolutely terrified-- and i can only imagine how much scarier it was after leo bailed on the escape pod. like, there’s no way raph was not hauling ass after leo the second he saw that happen.

= he takes a hit for leo, as in just barely stops it and loses a chunk of shell/plastron in the process. he sacrifices himself using his pod to get leo out of there safely (and there’s so much to be said about the fact that raph’s pod seems to be the only one that didn’t auto-activate. that only he and donnie seemed to know they even existed. there’s a whole talk they must have had right there, like raph would probably have had to ask specifically for this feature.)

- the krang try to intimidate answers out of him about the key, and when that doesn’t get them those answers, prime literally jams tentacles into his brain and roots around until he can find what they’re looking for. so that’s one bullet point on the list for outright mental violation. it looks/sounds very painful, not to mention terrifying. 

^^ and honestly, this point of suffering in particular is one that i think would be hardest for raph to actually bring up/talk about with his family. because none of them were there. none of them KNOW. and how do you explain that to them? how do you try to make yourself break that out when they’re already worried about the other stuff that happened to you and to everyone else? when part of you is guilty about it despite yourself, because so much of your identity is tied into being a protector that you can’t help but feel like you should have been able to wall that info off somehow and keep your family safe?

- gets infected by the krang and put into the big gross pod to... incubate, i guess? there’s so much unanswered about the point between brain torture and getting found by his family tbh. was he conscious and aware of being left alone in there? was that why he was so out of it even before the mutation?

- and then of course there’s said painful, grotesque body horror forced krang mutation that he has to go through once he’s out of the pod! thanks i hated it! like it seriously looks so gross and painful.

- ah yes and the mind control... being used as a tool and a puppet and specifically set out to hurt or even kill the family he loves and wants to protect. 

- the standard “we had our cool epic boss fight against the evil alien but he kicked our asses with one flick and then punched mikey and donnie all the way to staten island” physical roughage, too. leo portaled him after mikey and donnie so he could catch them. donnie took the brunt of the krang punch, and raph took the brunt of the hard landing (he is holding his side like he might have some rib issues, they all look rough af down there phew)

- leo’s sacrifice is leo’s sacrifice and definitely a leo development moment as an action itself, i’m never gonna say 'yep here’s how leo getting brutalized in prison dimension is all about raph’. i’m talking about the like, aftermath and pre-rescue emotional toll that that has etc etc etc. ftr.

point one there is obviously just the grief. like, raph is literally incapable of standing when it hits. he’s on all fours, he can’t open his eyes. i made a post comparing the caps of raph’s face getting stabbed and raph’s face when it was sinking in that leo was (apparently) Gone gone bc the expressions are nearly identical. like just. absolute agony. 

- and on top of that, i sincerely think that leo’s “you’re one to talk, hero moves are totally your thing” apparent last words are gonna stick with raph for a very long time. even after they save leo. the look on his face after leo says that... man. i think there’s a very real moment of raph going what have i done, what did i teach him? about the entire situation.

the way this is already tl;dr oh well SO IG SOME OF MY GENERAL TAKEAWAYS AND THINGS I THINK ABOUT WHEN IT COMES TO POST-MOVIE RAPH:

first and foremost. rip raph sufferer of some of the most intense eldest child syndrome i’ve ever seen. he feels bad that he got used to get his family’s location. he feels bad that he got used to harm and nearly kill his family. he probably feels bad that leo feels bad that his shell is damaged, smh. it’s guilt all the way down. the kind where he knows logically his family does not want or need apologies, that getting controlled was literally not his fault, but he feels bad anyway.

and like i said i get how it’s hard to get a handle on him for stuff, because raph is also... not super good at the emotional vulnerability sharing? it’s so wild because he’s very openly emotional and easy to read! he’ll cry during a sad movie scene and yell at a frustrating video game no problem, he’s very straightforward! but when it comes to sincere vulnerability and actually seeking comfort/closure about it, he has a big struggle vibe. good luck to the entire family bc every single brother is gonna be in a “oh but everyone else already has so much to deal with i don’t wanna pile more on with my problems” zone, i think. 

also just like. raph is a protector. that’s one of the core pillars of his sense of identity and worth. he takes care of his brothers. he keeps his family safe. and so so so much of what he went through or experienced in the movie went directly against that. raph, the big brother, the beating heart of the team, the one who takes hits, the overprotective mother hen, gets used to track down his family, and then gets used to hurt them. very nearly gets used to kill leo outright. isn’t there to take the hit for leo again at the end of the movie, is helpless as his little brother seemingly sacrifices his life to save them and the world. how does he come to terms with that? how does he feel like he still deserves the trust and faith that his family puts in him to keep being a rock? (they’re not scared of him, but he’s scared of him.)

and for real seriously how does he ever ever get around to dealing with that brain probe and the mutation specifically. his mind and his bodily autonomy got so deeply violated in the process of this movie. it’s scary! and painful! what kind of scenario would a writer even have to rig up to back him into enough of a corner to share those feelings with his family (who would absolutely want to comfort and support him)! it’s nightmarish stuff that’s gonna linger with him for the rest of his life. 

and in fact on the mutuation/mind control. i think the fact that leo was able to get through to raph just with words, that that was how he managed to break through the control, maybe means that raph was aware of what he was being made to do all along and just. unable to pull enough strength together to stop it before that point. woof.

idk idk if any of this makes real sense or helps for getting a handle on raph’s character at all tbh, it’s just a lot of me nonsensically putting him in a jar with a leaf and a stick for scientific observation ig. if ppl wanna hit me w questions or discussions about my personal opinions on my favorite boi feel free tbh

maybe the real raph character analysis was the hug and nightmare-free nap he probably desperately needs all along....... ah its too late hes dissociating on the couch. relatable.

#rottmnt #rottmnt raph #rise raph #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt movie #we try to make sense at almost midnight